


The Euphonius Scrolls

by Karl5



Category: Hercules: The Legendary Journeys
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 21:55:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 186,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13257393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karl5/pseuds/Karl5
Summary: A gem dealer by the name of Euphonius tells the story of his adventures mostly with Iolaus but also with Hercules, both sexual and not.  Most of the action follow the ins and outs of the series episodes, but sometimes it goes off on a tangent.





	1. Family

The Euphonius Scrolls  
Karl5

FAMILY

Despite a minor setback, it had been a very good day, so I was eminently pleased with myself. I was returning home from a successful trip, having sold a very nice emerald and diamond bracelet to a rich lady for a goodly number of dinars. By noon tomorrow, I'd be at my new house in Lydicea. I could've been there tonight, if my horse hadn't been stolen. Oh well, these things happen now and again. Of course, I wasn't exactly looking forward to seeing my father when I got home. The old man was pretty sick and simply couldn't manage by himself anymore, so when I had ended up with the property as a result of a bad debt, I had insisted he move in with me. He didn't like it much.

But I'd deal with all that tomorrow. Tonight I wanted nothing so much as a chance to get cleaned up and find a soft bed to sleep on. Oh yes, and someone else to share that bed would be nice also. I'd pay for that last item, if I had to, but I thought I'd look around a bit first and see if there was anything available for free. Accordingly, even as I arranged with the innkeeper for a hot bath and a room, I was also checking out the other men sitting around in the common room drinking, eating, or just generally hanging out. 

Hey, this is Greece, right? Unlike some other less-enlightened cultures out there, we know better than to restrict ourselves to the dubious pleasures of women. As for me, personally I prefer men. (Not boys, mind you, as so many men my age do. Children hold no interest for me.)

I noticed several possibilities, including one who really wasn't my type but was kind of intriguing anyway. Oh well, first a bath and some clean clothes, then I'd come back down and see if any of my likely prospects were still around. After all, I'd been on the road for three days and doubtless smelled that way, not to mention having a number of scrapes and bruises that would be much better for a good soaking.

As it happened, the only one of my possibilities still there when I returned a while later was the one I had marked down as questionable. I walked casually over to the fireplace and made as if to warm my hands at the flames, all the while keeping one eye on the little fellow with blond hair who sat by himself at a table against the wall, staring morosely into the tankard in his hand when he wasn't busy drinking from it. Two empty mugs sat on the table in front of him, mute evidence of the fact that he was doing his level best to get drunk as fast as he could. Although the tavern was noisy and crowded by this late in the evening, no one else shared the table with him. That was unusual in and of itself. After all, he was pretty good-looking, even if he wasn't my type. (My taste in men runs more towards tall, dark, and vaguely sinister types. This guy would never make the cut on that score. Far too pretty.)

I moved over to the bar to get some ale, and also to get a better view of the man who'd caught my eye. Despite a somewhat boyish appearance, on closer inspection I could tell he wasn't all that much younger than my own 45 years. Nice build too, but I had the insane urge to comb his curly sun-bleached hair, since it had that unkempt look that really irritates me. And he was kind of on the short side. Little men too often have something to prove. (I ought to know. I'm none too tall myself. Truth to be told, if this guy stood up, our eyes would probably be just about on the same level.)

So, overall, he wasn't my ideal lay. Why was I even considering making a move on him? To this day, I couldn't tell you. There was just something about him, I guess. Or maybe I was more than ordinarily horny.

I know, I know. I should have seen the warning signs: good-looking guy with no one, either male or female, even close to him, the empty mugs clearly showing his effort to get drunk, the men at nearby tables eyeing him strangely, as if they were a bit leery of him. But, as I just said, I was thinking with my prick rather than my brain, something that happens fairly often even to the best of us.

Overall, he was cute enough. I figured I wouldn't mind having him in my bed, if he went in for such diversions. I decided to give it my best shot. All he could do was tell me to fuck off, right? While I myself am nothing special in the looks department, I'm not terribly hard on the eyes either. If you saw me in a crowd, you probably wouldn't notice me. But then, that's the way I like it, most of the time. It's safer than being conspicuous, if you're a travelling merchant who deals in expensive goods.

Picking up my ale and the plate of rather dubious stew that had just been set in front of me, I strolled casually over to my disheveled blond target. 

"Care for some company?" I asked lightly.

He looked me up and down as if he really wasn't too sure if he did or not. The expression on his face almost made me reconsider. Then the blue-gray eyes softened slightly and he nodded.

Needing nothing more by way of an invitation, I sat down across from him. "My name's Euphonius. And you?"

"Iolaus," he replied shortly, before he went back to drinking whatever it was he was drinking.

The name didn't ring any bells with me. After all, it's a reasonably common name.

I tried every conversational gambit I knew to draw him out, but he just kept drinking and offered me nothing but monosyllables in reply. Despite his behavior, I got the feeling he didn't usually try to drink himself into oblivion this way. When he reached the bottom of his mug, I decided to try the direct approach. I gave an exasperated sigh and said, "Look, I can buy you another one of those, if you wish. But I'd much rather offer you something better. I've got a room upstairs, if you're interested."

I put one hand suggestively on his leather-clad thigh and gave him my best seductive smile. For a moment there, I didn't think it was going to work. He looked at me straight on and the blue eyes went cold and dead. I was afraid he was about to haul off and hit me. Then he smiled crookedly and the menace was gone as quickly as it had appeared.

"Okay. Yeah. That sounds good to me."

"C'mon, then." 

I stood up and headed for the stairs. He leaned over and picked up a sword that was almost as big as he was, then followed me somewhat unsteadily across the crowded tavern.

I had taken one of the nicest rooms the inn had to offer. Before going downstairs, I'd left one candle burning in a sconce on the far wall, just enough to shed a little light, but not too much. More romantic that way.

There was a brief moment of awkwardness once we were actually alone together. He looked at me kind of like he wasn't real sure how he had gotten himself into this, which made very little sense, as I was certain he had realized earlier on that I was picking him up. Naivete didn't fit him, so I figured there was some other reason. Maybe a lover somewhere? Or more likely just too much to drink and now he was having second thoughts?

I decided not to give him time to back out. Plastering myself against the front of his body, I wrapped one arm around his neck and kissed him, using the other hand to grab his crotch. Even through the leather, it was easy to tell that his cock wasn't having any second thoughts. That was a good sign.

He let the sword slip from his hand as I fondled him. When I saw the semi-glazed look in his eyes shift from half-drunk to sex, I broke off the kiss and stepped back a little.

"So, what's your pleasure, my friend?" I asked softly. "I can play it from either side."

He blinked, then focused on my face as his mouth went tight. "My choice?"

I nodded eagerly, trying to peel his vest down off his shoulders with the one hand that wasn't otherwise engaged.

"On your face. On the bed. Now," was the succinct and surprisingly harsh reply.

It was my turn to hesitate. Had I perhaps miscalculated here? Maybe he wasn't the gentle little pretty boy he appeared to be? If I had learned one thing in my long and varied sex life, it's that you don't judge a person's actions in bed by their appearance. But he just didn't come across as the abrupt and cruel type.

Still, I could be wrong.

"Is there a problem?" he asked, when I didn't move immediately. He had taken off his belt and held it in one hand.

"Uh – no. Of course not."

And there wasn't, not really. I'm used to fairly rough sex. I didn't mind it when he proceeded to pull my pants off and fuck me with very little in the way of preliminaries. Like I said, I've dealt with that before and I can handle it. I can even enjoy it, if it's done properly. What I haven't dealt with is someone who mutters an unending litany of extremely colorful curses and imprecations during the entire time he's pounding his cock into my ass, and then finally comes with something more like a strangled sob than a moan of pleasure.

He rolled off me and collapsed on the bed. I studied his face in profile for several seconds as he lay there catching his breath.

It was quite obvious that he was pretty damn mad at somebody or something, but, despite the way he'd just acted, I didn't think it was me. I jumped to a hasty conclusion and decided to try it out on reality.

"I'm not the one you really want in this bed, am I?" I asked carefully.

He just shook his head.

"Okay, now who is it you really want to be fucking?"

"Hercules."

"Hercules?!" Something clicked into place in my mind. "Oh, shit! You mean you're *that* Iolaus?"

"Yeah," he said, looking somewhat taken aback by my evident consternation. "I thought you knew. Most everybody around here does."

I shook my head slowly, still staring at him in shock. It made sense now. This was the man some people called Hercules' Golden Hunter, the demi-God's long-time friend and companion –- and his lover. What on earth was I doing in bed with someone like that? It could be just plain dangerous.

"He's going to kill me," I moaned.

Iolaus blinked, still puzzled. "Who? Herc? What for?"

"Well, I mean, you and me –- uh –- "

He laughed then, but it wasn't a particularly joyful sound. Bitter would describe it more accurately. "Don't worry. Hercules wouldn't hurt anyone just because I screwed around with them. It's not like that between us." A really dark shadow crossed his face. "Besides, it doesn't matter anyway. He's gone." 

He turned away from me, covering his eyes with one hand as he did so.

Okay, I could roll over and pretend to fall asleep now, effectively getting myself out of this situation before it became any worse. In the morning, if not before, he'd be gone. But he looked awfully forlorn curled up on the edge of the bed that way. And awfully gorgeous, even from behind.

So since when have I ever done the sensible thing when it comes to something like this? I scooted over behind him, put one arm carefully around his waist, and pulled him against me as tightly as I dared.

"You want to tell me about it?" I said to the tangled blond curls on the back of his head.

He sighed and I felt his body relax a fraction. Without ever once turning to face me, he recited the story about the death of Hercules' mother, and how Zeus had offered his half-mortal son the chance to be a full God and live on Mount Olympus.

"I told him to go," he concluded wretchedly. "It was the hardest thing I've ever done."

His voice broke. With something akin to surprise, I realized he was crying. I didn't know what to say, so I just held him. I never have known how to react to people when they cry. It's been so many years since I've had anything worth crying over, that I've almost forgotten what it feels like. Besides, my father always taught me a man doesn't cry, so I guess I've gotten out of the habit myself. 

But Iolaus was most certainly a man. And he was most certainly crying. Even if I couldn't see his face from my present vantage point, I could feel his shoulders shaking.

A couple of awkward minutes later, he pulled himself together. Wiping his eyes on the edge of the bedcovers, he propped himself up on one elbow as if he were about to get up.

That wasn't what I wanted. In an attempt to distract him from leaving, I said the first thing that came to my mind.

"So I guess you're pretty mad at this Hercules guy, huh?"

That had the desired effect. Instead of standing up, he turned over and faced me.

"I'm mad about the way things worked out. I'm not mad at him."

"Oh, really? I suppose you usually curse while you're fucking someone?"

He actually laughed with something like amusement before he admitted, "Okay, I'm mad at him too."

The expression on his face changed abruptly, as if he had just now recalled what we'd been doing and who was paying for the bed we’d been doing it in.

"Gods, you must be totally disgusted with me! First I screw you as if I'm raping somebody, then I lie here sniveling about another man. This can't be what you had in mind when you picked me up. I'll get out of here and let you have some peace."

"No. Stay. It's pretty late and you probably couldn't get a room at this hour anyway.

He looked rather doubtful. "You don't mind?"

"I don't mind. Why don't we just get some sleep?"

He reached over and touched my face. "Are you sure? I could try to make it up to you, for before."

I was sorely tempted by the offer, but his eyes were still red and bloodshot and I heard the lack of any real enthusiasm in his voice.

"Thanks, but no thanks. Your heart wouldn't be in it anyway. Not now."

He sighed and settled himself onto the pillow. "You're right."

He fell asleep before I did, but not by much. I can remember watching his shadowed profile in the semi-darkness and wondering exactly what I had gotten myself into this time.

 

I woke up to the glare of early morning sun on my face and the feel of his hand between my legs, caressing me gently. When I opened my eyes, he was leaning above me and smiling.

"You were kind to me last night," he said. "How about if we try it again?"

"I told you, you don't have to --"

"Your prick says differently. Besides, I want to. Now shut up."

So was I supposed to argue with him?

I'm not usually one for graphic descriptions of what happens in my bed. Let's just say he knew what he was doing and he did it very well indeed. By the time we were finished, I decided that I envied this Hercules character big-time.

As we were cleaning up and getting dressed, Iolaus asked me about the assorted collection of bruises he'd noticed on my body, now that it was light in the room.

"Oh, that's nothing much," I said negligently. "I was robbed on the way here. All they got was my horse and the money I keep handy as a decoy. No one ever finds my main stash of dinars. I'm pretty good at putting up just the right amount of resistance to be believable, but not so much that I get hurt badly." I shrugged and rubbed the bump behind my left ear ruefully. "I seem to have miscalculated a little this time."

"You carry a lot of money with you?"

"Sometimes. I'm a merchant. I deal in valuable goods."

By this time, we both had our clothes on. "C'mon, let's get something to eat and hit the road," I suggested. "Where are you heading from here?"

"Lydicea."

"Just what I was hoping you'd say. Since we're both going to the same place, how about if we travel together? I'm always glad of company, especially if my company carries a big sword and knows how to use it."

Of course, I could easily have bought another horse and been on my way, but I didn't mention that. I was starting to seriously like this little guy, and with Hercules out of the picture –- Hey, who knows what could happen?

He laughed and nodded, as I had hoped he would.

 

The day was warm, the sun was shining, the road was not too dusty, and it turned out that Iolaus was an excellent talker, now that he wasn't sitting around trying to drown himself in alcohol. I was almost sorry our destination wasn't further away. As it was, we'd be there by mid-morning.

"So why are you going to Lydicea?" I asked him when we were barely an hour's walk from our destination. I figured if I knew why he was in town, maybe I could get a rough idea whether or not he was planning to stay for long.

"My mother moved there a few years ago, after she remarried. I haven't seen her in years and I've never even met her new husband, but ever since Alcmene's death, she's been on my mind a lot. I thought it was about time I went home for a visit." He glanced over at me, clearly relieved to change the subject. "How about you? What kind of business does a successful merchant have in an out-of-the-way little town?"

So I told him about the house I'd recently acquired, and my father, and the widow I had hired as a housekeeper. "Of course, I'm not home a lot. Mostly I'm on the road, looking for stuff to buy that will turn a profit. Only luxury goods, mind you. I don't deal with ordinary things."

"You can make a living that way?"

"Oh, yeah. If you know what you're doing. What do you do to keep the dinars coming in?"

"Well, Herc and I, we usually just traveled around helping people with problems. You know, kill a monster here, save a village there. That sort of thing."

"Oh, come on now. Get real. You can't earn money like that."

"We never starved. And it sure beats farming."

"Anything beats farming." 

"You got that right!"

"So, what are you going to do to earn a living now that Hercules is out of the picture?"

"I don't know. I'm a fair blacksmith. Maybe I'll try that, but I haven't really decided yet. Maybe I'll just travel around for a while and see what comes up."

He got unusually quiet. Maybe I'd said the wrong thing, mentioning Hercules. Then again, if that's where his thoughts were, maybe I could get him to tell me more about it. 

"Have you and Hercules been together for a long time? As lovers, I mean?"

"Oh, we played around a lot when we were young. Then, after a while, he seemed to lose interest. I thought we'd outgrown it, like many boys do. Well, I thought Herc had outgrown it, at any rate. The Gods know, I never did. But we drifted apart. I found a woman, even got married. I wanted kids and all. You know how it is."

"Yeah, I know how it is. My father reminds me every chance he gets that I'm supposed to have presented him with a flock of grandchildren by now. He keeps telling me how disappointed he is because I haven't. It's not that he has any objection to my fooling around with men. He just expects me to get married also."

"Parents can be like that, can't they?"

I nodded. But this really wasn't what I wanted to talk about. I knew more than enough about myself. It was him I wanted to hear about.

"So what happened?" I prompted. "You know, with the wife and kids and all?"

"She died," he said shortly.

Oops! I'd walked into that one with both feet in my mouth, as usual. I noticed he'd said nothing about the kids, if there had been any, but I wasn't about to pursue it. I decided not to give him time to dwell on the subject of his family.

"Okay, so what about you and Hercules then?"

"Oh, he got married too and I figured that was that: there'd be nothing more between us for sure. I was wrong. After Hera killed his family –- well, we kind of picked up where we'd left off, still on a more or less casual basis. Herc still basically wanted a wife, and I confess I find women every bit as enjoyable as men. Things didn't even start to get intense between us until after Serena died." His forehead creased into a frown. "But no one knows about Serena, because Herc went back and changed time so it never happened. But I still remember it, somehow, even though it didn't happen, and –-"

"Iolaus, you're not making much sense here," I interrupted.

He shook his head and looked even more perplexed. "I know. Going back in time doesn't make sense. I tried it once myself. Very confusing. So many things went wrong." He broke off and just grinned. "Okay, forget it. I'm babbling."

"So what about after Serena died, or didn't die, or whatever happened to her?" I prompted.

"Well, anyway, after that, I thought it was going to be me and Herc forever. Now --" He hesitated and the desolation came back into his eyes. "I guess not."

By now we were at the gate to my property. The main part of Lydicea was just ahead, but you couldn't quite see the buildings yet, although they were just over the next hill. 

"This is where I get off," I said, surprised at how much I didn't want to part company with Iolaus.

He glanced over at the good-sized house sitting by a small stream. "Nice place."

"Yeah, it is." I stood with my hand on the gate for too long, watching him as he looked around appreciatively at the cultivated fields and the neat vegetable garden alongside the house. "Easy enough to keep up, if you've got the dinars to hire people to do the work for you," I volunteered.

He nodded. "Yeah. I guess it would be." He smiled, and the sun was eclipsed by the brightness of his face. "Guess I'd better be on my way." He held out a hand in farewell. 

I took that hand and held on for as long as I reasonably could. "I'll look for you in town later on, okay?" I suggested hopefully. "There's a nice tavern there." Recalling how much he had seemed to enjoy the breakfast we'd had earlier that morning, I added quickly, "Really good food. And the ale's better than the stuff we had last night. How about it?"

"Yeah. Maybe."

Well, it wasn't a no.

"Later then?"

He laughed. "You're persistent, aren't you?"

"Yeah. One of my faults."

"Okay, I'll look for you in town," he finally agreed, blinding me again with his smile. "I intended to all along, you know," he finished as he turned and headed on down the road.

I stood there watching him. He turned and waved just before disappearing over the top of the hill. I really didn't want this guy to start to mean anything to me. I'm very happy alone. I'm not looking for a permanent lover or anything like that. Relationships have never been my strong point, which is doubtless one of the several good reasons I have for not getting married. I've never been so miserable as when I've tried to live with someone, nor so happy as when I've been by myself. I learned that a long time ago, so now I try to always keep it casual, and, hopefully, friendly, but never intense. 

Nevertheless, something melted deep inside when Iolaus smiled at me. I reminded myself sternly that I would *not* fall for him, come what may. Screw him anytime I had the opportunity, yes. But love him I would not. 

I sighed, took a deep breath, and went through the gate, steeling myself to encounter my father. Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy, but Dad and I just never did see things the same way, and I never really felt I was anything but a big disappointment to him somehow.

As I expected, he was waiting just inside the door, in his usual chair next to the front window. The housekeeper wasn't around, so I figured she was busy somewhere in back. Her daughter would be in school at this time of day.

"So, my wandering son returns once again, eh?" Phyleus greeted me. "Successfully, I trust?"

"Very much so."

"So successful you even sold your horse?" he asked, with an acerbic smile that took a little of the bite out of the words.

"Well, I did have one little bit of bad luck," I admitted. "I'll tell you all about that later, okay? First I want to get cleaned up and changed."

I almost thought I was going to escape to the safety of my rooms when Dad had a brief coughing fit. I hurried to his side, but he waved me off, gesturing that he would be okay in a minute. The weakness in his lungs had gotten worse lately, although he refused to admit it. That was a large part of the reason I had insisted on his living here.

No sooner had he recovered his breath, than he frowned at me and asked, "Who was that man who came walking up the road with you?"

Damn! He would have to notice Iolaus.

I shrugged. "Just a friend. Someone I met last night. He was on his way here, so we traveled together."

"I see."

He didn't say anything more, but I knew what he was thinking from the set of his mouth. Then the annoyance turned to a smile. "You know, you got a real find in Ysabel. I like her very much."

Ysabel was the housekeeper. As I mentioned earlier, a widow with a young daughter. The Trojan War left a lot of widows and orphans behind. 

"Oh?" I replied noncommittally.

"She keeps a very neat house, gets a good price on food in the marketplace. And her cooking –- Well, her meals are better than your mother used to make, and you know I wouldn't say that lightly."

No, he certainly wouldn't. Even though she died more than twenty years ago, I can still recall my mother's meals. And her love, and her caring, and her bravery when she faced the lingering illness that resulted in her death.

But I could take a guess at what all this praise of Ysabel was leading up to. "I'm glad you're so pleased with her."

"Oh yes. She's so sweet-tempered and gentle. And little Daria's a good girl. I'm quite fond of her. Ysabel would make some man a good wife, let me tell you."

"So why not ask her to marry you?" I inquired innocently.

"Son, she's more than twenty years younger than I am. I was thinking more about you."

"We've been over this before, Dad."

"I know," he said with a sigh that turned into a ragged cough. "I just keep hoping you'll decide to live up to your responsibilities as a man one of these days."

He struggled up out of his chair and walked out the door, effectively preventing me from continuing the discussion. He did that a lot, and I always found it frustrating. However, this time there really wasn't anything more for me to say on the topic. I like my life as it is. A wife and kids aren't going to happen. Period. End of discussion.

Someday, Dad was going to get that through his head. Maybe.

 

As it turned out, Ysabel's cooking was entirely worthy of my father's praises. I barely knew the woman herself, but I had to admit her housekeeping skills left little to be desired, since the place was spotless and the kitchen garden neat and well-tended. I had apparently done well when I'd hired her.

For a middle-aged woman, she wasn't hard to look at, either.

However, despite my father's fond hopes of matchmaking, I noticed all too quickly that it wasn't me Ysabel fussed over, nor was it my face on which her eyes lingered longingly: it was his. Possibly I could encourage this turn of events? If the old man had a wife of his own once again, maybe he'd quite worrying about my love life? It was a thought.

Meanwhile, talking about my love life, it might be worth stopping by the tavern for a bit, just in case Iolaus were to show up. It was early yet, but one never knows.

On the pretext of wanting to shop for a new pair of boots, I headed into town, where I just happened to decide I was awfully thirsty and stopped in for a drink.

I had almost finished my second mug of ale when Iolaus appeared at the door. He actually seemed glad to see me, flashing one of his bright smiles and joining me at my table. A gesture to the serving wench brought us more ale.

"So, how'd you make out with your mother?" I asked.

"Pretty well, considering. It's my step-father I'm having problems with. He's very resentful of the way my absence hurt Erytheia. I did get her to talk to me about it." He grinned sheepishly and took another swallow of his ale. "She actually thought she had done something to drive me away, when it wasn't her fault at all, it was mine."

"Did you tell her that?"

"Yeah. I told her I was ashamed to go home because I always wanted to be the kind of man she would be proud of, and I didn't think I was."

I could sure relate to that. I always wanted my father to be proud of me too, and he never seemed to be. But we were talking about Iolaus here, not me.

"So what did she say to that?" I prompted.

"She told me she loved me, but didn't know me well enough to be proud of me."

I nodded, commiserating. "Parents are often the ones who know you least. It has nothing to do with love."

"Yeah, but with my mother, it's because I wasn't even around."

There was regret in his voice. He took another swallow from his tankard, then just sat staring at it listlessly.

And I sat staring at him, wondering what I could do to help. And wondering why it mattered to me.

This was definitely not good. I was getting way too fond of this guy. Bad enough I couldn't be near him without wanting him in my bed again, but now I was actually beginning to care about him. 

Euphonius, this has got to stop, I instructed myself firmly. You have no chance at all of keeping him, Hercules or no Hercules. He's a hero. You're a wimp. Case closed.

Nevertheless, I was about to offer him more of my sage wisdom regarding the relationship between parents and children when a terrible commotion burst out in the street. There was the distant whump of something exploding, then shouting and loud voices mingled with screams of "Fire!". 

Iolaus was on his feet and headed for the door before I even thought of reacting, but it didn't take me long to run after him. Through drifting smoke and running people, I caught a glimpse of his blond hair disappearing around a building, headed for the main street in town. I sprinted in that direction myself, not so much because I thought there was anything I could do as because I didn't want to let him out of my sight.

As I rounded the building, I saw him not far ahead of me. He stopped short in front of a tall man with long hair who was herding a group of kids away from the burning school. Much to my relief, I saw Daria with the children. Ysabel had her hand and was leading her daughter to safety.

I dismissed them from my mind when I heard Iolaus exclaim, "Hercules!"

I looked back at the big man. So this was the famous hero, huh? No doubt about it, he was pretty damn impressive, not to mention just plain gorgeous. Even in the excitement of the moment, I had time to notice that. But he was also the one who had walked out on Iolaus, so I felt a brief flare of resentment and dislike for him, no matter whether he was God, mortal, or part of both.

Hercules yelled something to Iolaus about making sure everyone was out of the school. My heart skipped a beat as I watched Iolaus disappear into the smoke and flame of the burning school building without a moment of hesitation. I sprinted across the street to the doorway. By now gasping for breath, I got there just in time to see a couple of young boys come staggering out, coughing and sobbing. One fell across the threshold and the other stumbled over him.

I snatched up the child on the ground, took the other boy by the arm, and got them both clear of the fire, then hurried back to see if I could do anything more.

Iolaus was inside the flaming building. I heard his voice, shouting to the children to keep calm and follow him. Coward that I am, I just stayed by the door and helped the kids he brought out. Right before a chunk of the roof caved in, Iolaus staggered out into the street, one arm around the schoolteacher. I grabbed the man's other arm and we hauled him clear of the flying sparks and flaming debris.

Iolaus was smudged with soot and I could see a rather nasty burn on his arm. He doubled over, coughing violently, as the schoolteacher collapsed on the ground. I didn't know who to tend to first. Fireballs flared and exploded, as more buildings burst into flame. I looked around, trying to figure out what was going on.

A golden young man perched on some kind of a flying board tossed fire casually here and there. He was clearly no mortal. Not with that kind of power. From the coloring and the way he practically glowed, I figured him to be Apollo.

I've always believed that a prudent person stays well out of the way of the Gods. But this one wasn't giving us much choice.

As I stared in horror, I saw this golden asshole hurl another fireball toward the shop across the street, in front of which stood Ysabel, Daria, and my father! Time slowed down for me in that awful way it has of doing in really bad situations. As the fireball exploded against the front of the shop, my father threw himself at Ysabel, pushing her and her child to the ground and falling on top of them. The building blew apart. Chunks of wall crashed down.

Screaming, "Father! No!", I raced over to the pile of blazing debris, pulling desperately at whatever I could reach that wasn't already aflame. Iolaus appeared at my side, pulling and heaving the pieces of wood with more strength than I'd have expected from Hercules himself, much less a small mortal man. Powered by the unnatural strength of desperation, I was astonished by my own actions in digging through the burning wreckage. The heat seemed not to matter as I fought to reach the buried people.

"Euphonius, under here!" Iolaus yelled, straining to hold the end of a heavy chunk of wall a few feet up off the ground.

Catching a glimpse of fabric through the swirling dust and smoke, I hunched down and worked my way beneath the piece of wall, clawing frantically at the smoking bits of wood beneath. I found my father first and pulled him out, then went back for the others, as Iolaus struggled not to drop the heavy load on top of us. I can claim no particular courage here. It simply never occurred to me that I might have been killed if he had buckled under the weight.

I barely got Ysabel and Daria clear of the flaming debris when Iolaus dropped the whole mess with a crash.

The town burned around me, but I had eyes only for the people we had rescued. Ysabel was already sitting up, choking and gasping for breath and holding her daughter to her breast. They seemed relatively unharmed, but my father lay where I had left him, blood oozing from his mouth and nose. Charred chunks of flesh showed in the places where his clothing had burned completely away.

Kneeling beside him, I took him in my arms. His chest rose and fell in tortured gasps, each breath forming red bubbles on his lips.

"Dad," I whispered brokenly. "Oh, Dad, no."

With Iolaus helping her, Ysabel staggered over to kneel opposite me. Still coughing, she nevertheless bent over my father, stroking his face and calling his name.

Iolaus squatted down next to her, one arm still around her shoulder for support. His other hand skimmed quickly over my father's chest as he glanced at the burned patches of skin showing through torn clothing. As he looked up at me over Ysabel's bowed head, I saw in his face the confirmation of what I already knew.  
Just then, my father gave a few weak coughs and opened his eyes.

"I love you, Phyleus," Ysabel said softly.

He blinked and looked surprised. Clearly, that was not what he'd expected to hear. His eyes met mine. "Take care of them, Euphonius," he said, struggling to get the words past his lips.

I nodded, my eyes filling with tears.

"Don't let me see you cry over me, son," the dying man said, the effort of speaking causing him to grimace with pain.

I nodded, trying valiantly to choke back my tears, but a few leaked down my cheeks. It seemed I couldn't even obey my father's dying wish and act like a man this one last time, which only added to my distress.

"I'm sorry, Dad. I'm so sorry," I blurted out. "I wish I'd been someone you could have been proud of." 

His eyes closed and he drew in a ragged breath. Still fighting back my tears, I leaned close to his ear and whispered, "I love you, Dad."

He coughed again, and the words he said didn't come out clearly. I thought, I hoped, that what he was trying to say was "I love you too." 

Then the rest of the air gurgled out of his lungs, and his chest didn't rise again. His eyes half-closed and lost their focus.

Wailing, Ysabel fell on his chest. I let her take him from my arms, and she cradled him to her breast, sobbing and kissing his face. Little Daria stood beside her, sobbing.

I couldn't bear to watch their grief. Rising to my feet, I turned away, still trying to hide my unwanted tears.

Then Iolaus was in front of me, a hand on either of my shoulders. I tried to turn away from him also, but he wouldn't let me. I had no choice but to meet his eyes.

"He was wrong, you know," Iolaus told me gently. "You're not any less a man because you have feelings. You can be strong and brave and still cry. In fact, if you don't, there's something wrong with you."

I remembered this man's body shaking with sobs as I held him in my arms just last night. If he wasn't strong, then who was? If he isn't a hero, then heroes don't exist.

"I should have done something more," I objected. "I should have saved him."

"No. You did all you could. And when you've done all you can, then that's all you can do."

I looked at him. There was a restrained sorrow in his voice as he said that. I saw it reflected very clearly in those blue-gray eyes as well. It was obvious that he'd faced some sort of failure of his own, somewhere along the line.

I nodded and something broke loose inside. The tears at last rolled freely down my face. His arms went around me and he pulled me into a hug. I cried on his shoulder, clutching him against me like a drowning man might clutch at his rescuer.

 

I wasn't involved in the rest of the action that day. I didn't see Hercules confront Apollo and stop him from causing any more destruction. I was too busy getting my father back to our house, where Ysabel took charge of washing the body and preparing it for the funeral pyre.

Overwrought, I was pacing the front yard when a thought occurred to me: I would put up the necessary dinars to rebuild the school. That seemed a fitting memorial to my father. He had always been fond of children, after all. And they had always seemed to like him.

No sooner thought than acted upon. Telling Ysabel where I was going, I headed over the hill and into Lydicea to find the schoolmaster.

The fires were out by this time. People were at work salvaging what they could from the wreckage and cleaning up the useless debris. I caught sight of the schoolteacher up on the roof of the school, with Iolaus next to him. The teacher came down a rough flight of makeshift stairs, but before I could reach him, someone else beat me to it. Not wanting to intrude, I faded back out of sight under the stairway, impatiently waiting my turn.

So it was that I overheard the conversation and discovered the tall, scholarly-looking man was Pandion, Iolaus' step-father, come to town to find out what had happened. As the teacher told him how Iolaus had gotten himself and many of the children out of the burning building at the risk of his own life, I couldn't help moving a little closer so I could hear better.

When the teacher walked away, I was all set to follow him, but I heard Iolaus call out to his step-father and come down the stairs. Okay, so call me nosey. I stayed where I was and listened to them talk, curious as to what would happen.

They both tried to apologize to each other, with Pandion finally admitting that Iolaus does what he does for a good reason.

When Iolaus concluded hopefully, "We can be friends, can't we?" I grinned to myself, watching them clasp forearms and smile at each other.

With my curiosity satisfied and a foolish grin still lingering on my face, I left to find the teacher, who greeted my proposal for rebuilding with joy and gratitude. That done, I returned home to mourn my father.

 

The following morning, I went to find Iolaus so I could thank him for the help and support he'd given me. The door was opened by a small woman with her gray hair pulled tightly back into a long braid falling over her left shoulder. She was fairly plain, but had nice eyes, with a sort of kindness in them. This had to be Erytheia, Iolaus' mother.

When I asked for her son, she told me he'd just left, heading off again in a search for new adventures.

"He never did stay in one place very long, even as a child," Erytheia told me with a sad smile. "You can probably catch up with him, if you hurry. He was going to take the path through the woods that makes a shortcut to the main road."

I knew the way she meant. I set off at a quick pace, hoping to overtake him before he'd gotten too far. The path was well-traveled and easy to follow. I had just caught sight of Iolaus' blond hair through the trees up ahead and was about to call out his name when the air shimmered and sparkled on the trail at a point close behind him. Much to my surprise, Hercules coalesced out of the sparkles and strode quickly after Iolaus, not even noticing me behind him. I scurried over into the bushes, not too sure what was going on and not wanting to take any chances.

I saw Iolaus stop abruptly next to a treetrunk overhanging the path and duck aside. He came up with a fallen limb in his hands, spinning around and swinging it at the unseen man he must have heard approaching from behind. 

The big man blocked the limb easily and said, with a hint of amusement in his voice, "I –- uh –- I missed you too."

"Hercules –-" Iolaus tossed the limb aside. "It's –- it's good to see you," he concluded tentatively.

"It's good to see you," was the other man's reply. "Well, I'm back."

"Back?" Iolaus' face lit up as if the sun were shining again after many long nights of darkness. "You mean, like back, back? Like really back? No more Olympus? No more Hercules the God?"

"Just half God."

They clasped forearms. Iolaus patted Hercules' arm with his other hand, as if he couldn't hardly wait to touch him.

"That's terrific! So –- what happened?"

Almost self-consciously, they let go of each other.

"I realized how much my family means to me –- ," Hercules said, "and you're it."

Iolaus got this kind of goofy grin on his face, then suddenly turned away and started off down the trail. Hercules ran after him. I saw him catch up, and they walked on together, still talking, but by now they were too far away for me to hear their voices.

As I watched them disappear among the trees, I couldn't help but be happy for Iolaus. Oh sure, I'm going to miss him. He was a good lay. I'm not likely to find another one like him in a long while. I only hope Hercules realizes what he's got there, that's all.

No, I'm not going to end it that way. I'm trying to be tough and cold, but that's only more macho bullshit to cover up the hurt. Iolaus touched me where I hadn't been touched in a long, long time. He touched my heart, not just my prick. And if there were tears leaking from my eyes as I watched him walk away with the man he loves –- Well, there's nothing wrong with that. You're allowed to cry when you lose a part of your family, aren't you?

I turned around and trudged back down the trail. Tonight there would be a funeral pyre waiting for my father's body. I knew that even as I mourned for my father, some of my tears would also be for the lack of a certain pretty little blond hero who no longer stood by my side.


	2. CLOSEST TO YOUR HEART

CLOSEST TO YOUR HEART  
I am the darkness that you hold closest to your heart.

 

I was at Erytheia's house when the message arrived, brought by a grizzled old sailor. Ever since Iolaus had left town after his all too brief reunion with his mother, she and I had become friends. Erytheia had asked me over for lunch that day, as she often did when I wasn't off travelling, and she was bustling around at the stove.

Women like me, even though I'm not much attracted to them. I'm a good listener, and I always take their words very seriously, something most men haven't realized they need to do. Besides, Erytheia and I share a common interest: her son.

Anyway, my mouth was already watering in anticipation of one of her excellent meals when a knock came at the door.

"I'll get it," I offered.

"No, that's all right, Euphonius. Stay where you are."

She opened the door and took the scroll, absently thanking the bearer. All the color drained from her face as she read it. I thought she was going to faint, so I put an arm around her waist and led her to a chair

"What is it? What's wrong?"

"Iolaus," she said, as the tears started running down her cheeks. 

I took up the parchment that had fallen from her limp fingers. It told me only what I had already guessed from Erytheia's reaction: Iolaus was dead. He died a hero, the letter said, sacrificing his life to save the Queen of Sumeria, who was the author of the message. He died in Hercules' arms, and was interred with great ceremony and honor. She wrote also of her love for him, this Queen.

In future years, I would hear all the details of Iolaus' death, embroidered, elaborated, exaggerated, and eulogized upon by many different bards. But none of that would hurt nearly so much as holding his mother in my arms while she cried, and cursed the Gods, who had taken her son from her just as she had been getting to know him once again. 

For her sake, I choked back my own sorrow over the man I had known for so short a time, but had found myself caring for so deeply, ever since that night he had shared my bed, while Hercules was away being a God on Mount Olympus. She knew about that, because I had told her after we had become friends. But Erytheia was his mother, and her grief took precedence over mine.

When Pandion came back from the village, I turned her over to him, leaving them to console each other, as it should be. I was, after all, just a friend of the family.

In a daze, I walked through the little village of Lydicea and down the road to my house just beyond the other side of the town, getting as far as the trees at the edge of my property before I broke down. By the time I got home, my hands were raw from pounding out my anger on the rough tree bark and I had no more curses to choke out to the uncaring universe. My housekeeper took one look at me and set her small daughter to heating water, in order to clean my hands and brew a calming tea. I couldn't even tell her what was wrong until several hours later.

I had originally planned to start out on a trip to Athens the next day, hoping to find a deal on some jewelry. I'm a merchant, but I only trade in quality merchandise. That way I don't have to work too hard at it, since one decent sale can keep me in dinars for months. But for that sort of thing to work, one has to know one's gems and precious metals, not to mention have connections to people with enough wealth to want to buy what I have to offer. It had taken me the biggest part of my 45 years to acquire the knowledge and the contacts, but I'd done it. I'm reasonably well off. Now, I go to the various markets and bazaars, travelling inconspicuously and modestly and trusting my instincts to tell me when that rare piece of truly valuable jewelry shows up in the unsuspecting hands of someone who has no idea of its worth.

This being the case, I spend a lot of time away from my home in Lydicea, leaving it in the care of Ysabel, the housekeeper I just mentioned, a middle-aged widow whose husband died in the Trojan War.

Under normal circumstances, I enjoy my itinerant lifestyle and would have been more than ready to hit the road once again. Now, however, the news of Iolaus' death sent me into a funk. I moped around the house, unable to work up any real interest in anything. I tried to tell myself this was stupid. I barely knew the man. Yes, he had helped me deal with the death of my father, when Apollo came to town and started tossing fireballs around. And, yes, as I've mentioned, we had spent one night together, when he'd thought he'd lost Hercules to Olympus. But that was it. There was no logical reason why his death should hurt me so badly. It made no sense, and yet, the weeks went by, and my apathy only grew worse.

Before Iolaus died, I had been able to imagine our paths might cross again. Before, I had been able to listen to the travelling bards tell of Hercules' exploits, always with my heart and mind focused on the actions of his little blonde sidekick, although most of the audiences didn't even seem to care what happened to the brave mortal warrior, who stood faithfully in the shadow of the famous half-God hero. Before, I had been able to picture that bright smile and heroic heart, happy with the companion and lover he had chosen. Shit, before I had even been able to picture the two of them together, bodies interlaced and entwined as they sought pleasure in each other. I try not to give in to jealousy. I knew I could never take him away from Hercules. But there were times I thought I'd give my soul if I could.

And yet, the honest truth still remained that I barely knew the man, so why did his death hit me so hard?

I had no answers. The weeks went by, and I was at home. Ysabel worried and fussed over me, to no avail.

It almost seemed the countryside shared my grief, as a fierce drought swept the land, bringing the threat of famine in its wake. Everyone was on edge and anxious, wondering what was happening. The Gods turned deaf ears to the desperate pleas of their followers. No answers came from Olympus. It was even rumored that they had fled Greece.

 

The night I dreamed about Iolaus, it didn't surprise me all that much. I'd dreamed about my father fairly often in the months after his death and some of those dreams had been so real that it was frightening, even when the dreams themselves had been essentially happy ones.

That's why I wasn't particularly surprised to find Iolaus leaning over me, kissing his way down my chest towards my groin. (To be perfectly honest, I'd had that sort of dream a number of times even before he had died. You know how it is.) 

His mouth closed over my already hard cock and I was loving every minute of it, until it dawned on me that something wasn't quite right here. 

"Uh – Iolaus -- you're dead," I said flatly, reacting much as I usually did to the dream images of my father. That realization was generally enough to wake me up, but it didn't work this time.

His mouth left my straining cock, to be replaced immediately by his fingers.

"Yeah," he replied agreeably. "So what?"

"Uh -- so we shouldn't be doing this?" I suggested, taken aback by his casual attitude.

"You're enjoying it, aren't you?"

That was an incredible understatement for what I was feeling. It was all I could do to keep talking as my body squirmed under his expert touch.

"But this is only a dream," I tried to point out reasonably.

"And I suppose you've never had a wet dream before?" he asked, with a smile that was somehow twice as seductive as I remembered it to be. "About me?"

I'd have been lying through my teeth if I'd denied that.

His golden head ducked down once more towards my groin, but an uneasiness came sneaking into my mind, outweighing even the glorious sensation of his tongue licking my cock. This whole thing was starting to seem all too real for me.

"There's something wrong here," I objected, although not very forcefully.

"Euphonius," he asked archly, "do you really want me to stop what I'm doing?"

"Yes." 

He stopped, propped his head up on one hand, and just lay there looking at me. I was too far gone to leave it at that, and he knew it.

"Uh –- I mean, no."

"I didn't think so."

His mouth returned to where it had been, only this time he went down on me with a vengeance, taking my cock entirely into his mouth and sucking hard, even as he stuck one finger up my ass.

"Oh Gods!" I gasped, as I came. 

I was still trying to catch my breath when he moved to lie on top of me. Looking down at my face, he smiled and kissed me very gently. I felt his erection pressed against my groin.

"Want me to keep going?" he asked, sounding very confident of the answer.

By now my mind was clearer. "No." I took hold of his shoulders and pushed him far enough away that I could focus my eyes on him. "What's going on?"

A quick flash of annoyance crossed his face, gone almost before I was sure I had seen it.

"Nothing's going on," he replied. "Isn't it enough that I'm here? One of the advantages of being dead is that I can hear it when someone thinks about me, and you've been thinking about me a lot, haven't you?"

"You know that?"

"I know more than that." The seductive grin was back. One finger traced delicately over my lips as he went on. "You'd like to take me away from Hercules, wouldn't you? Well, here's your chance."

I shook my head. "Somehow, I don't believe that."

The grin slipped a notch, and his eyes turned solid black.

"Are you refusing me, Euphonius?" 

There was a tone in his voice that I'd never heard before. This was becoming very strange. 

"No," I replied. "I could never do that. Dead or alive or anything in between, I want you."

That seemed to satisfy him. The darkness left his eyes.

"But I need to know what's going on," I persisted. "Why are you here? What do you want?"

He kissed me, fast and hard enough that my lip split against his teeth. Then he leaned back and looked down at me.

"All in good time, my friend. All in good time. Let's just say, you haven't seen the last of me yet. Come to Corinth. You'll find me there."

An instant later, he was gone and I was alone in my bed. I sat up in shock, staring around in the dim light of the gibbous moon that hung just outside my window. The whole thing couldn't have happened. I had been asleep, that was all. 

My lip hurt. When I touched it, there was blood running down my chin. That's when it occurred to me that, if this had been nothing more than another wet dream, why wasn't the lower part of me –- uh -- wet?

Do I really need to tell you that I started out for Corinth the following morning? 

 

I had no idea of what I was going to find, but it surpassed all my hopes and imaginings. Almost as if something were guiding my steps, I was drawn to a small temple. I don't even recall to which God it was dedicated. Or should I say, had been dedicated? It was obviously under new management now.

I went inside, still somewhat puzzled as to what I was doing there. I almost fainted dead away from shock when I heard Iolaus' voice and caught sight of him standing in front of a group of people, exhorting them about something. I didn't even notice what he was saying, so caught up was I in simply staring at him. (Not that it mattered what he said. All that mattered was that he was standing there saying it.)

He looked gorgeous, in a white floor-length robe with wide sleeves. The stole around his neck was decorated with red, white, and gold sunburst patterns and he wore heavy gold bracelets on his wrists. On top of all that, his hair was combed back more neatly than I was accustomed to seeing it and seemed a bit shorter and less wild.

My mouth was probably still hanging open in surprise as I worked my way into the small crowd listening to him. I had to find out more about this. The young woman next to me was staring up at him with a rapt expression on her face, so I figured she might make a good informant.

Leaning close to her, I asked in a whisper, "Excuse me, but can you tell me what's going on here?"

"This is Iolaus, the God of Light," she replied, voice as rapt as her face. "He's come to offer us salvation."

"Iolaus? The one who was Hercules' friend?"

"Yes. Hercules went crazy while they were in Sumeria," she told me, eyes still fixed on her saviour, as if reciting a familiar formula. "When he vowed to destroy the Olympian Gods, Iolaus ate ambrosia in order to become a God himself. Now he has returned, to save Greece from the insane son of Zeus."

That didn't quite jibe with what I knew, but I kept quiet, only nodding sagely at the information.

The God of Light concluded his sermon by asking his followers if they accepted him. Without fully realizing I was doing it, I responded with the others, "Now and forever!"

He smiled benevolently, then walked down among the people, who reached out to him, ecstatically happy if he deigned to touch or take notice of one of them. I watched from off to the side. I was still standing there leaning against a column when he dismissed his followers and they went off about their business.

He looked at me, then walked over, his face glowing with apparent delight. The eyes I remembered as blue were solid black, which somehow served to make him look more devastatingly desirable than usual.

"You came," was all he said.

I barely had the presence of mind to reply, "Was there ever any doubt?"

"No, not really." He laughed and draped an arm around my shoulders, leading me out of the main part of the temple, down a short hallway, and into a small, well-appointed room. I wasn't really surprised when he pulled me into an embrace and kissed me hard on the mouth. I guess I didn't respond as enthusiastically as he expected, because he broke off abruptly, held me at arm's length, and studied me with a funny look on his face.

"Okay, what is it? What's wrong?" he finally asked.

"Iolaus, I –- uh –- I know what really happened in Sumeria. I read the letter."

"What letter?" he asked guardedly.

"The letter Queen Nebula sent to your mother. I was there when it arrived."

"I see. That explains how you knew I was dead, before it became general knowledge." His voice turned strange, and scarlet fire glowed behind the blackness of his eyes. "And what exactly is it that you think you know about Sumeria?" 

"I know you died saving the queen's life, and were embalmed and interred according to the local customs. You didn't just eat ambrosia and become a God, the way you told these people."

He considered that for a while, still studying me with a speculative look on his face. Then the fire in his eyes faded away and he grinned. 

"You're right. It didn't happen that way at all."

That really wasn't the sort of answer I'd expected. Before I even realized it, I blurted out, "So why have you lied about it?"

He shook his head, still smiling. 

"Euphonius, there's something you've got to understand about religion," he said in a confidential tone. "There's the official dogma, the pretty story that gets told to the masses because that's all they're capable of understanding. Then there are the real truths, the secrets that are revealed only to true disciples, believers who are able to see beyond the surface, people I can trust." Still smiling, he drew me down next to him on a brocade-covered couch. "People such as you."

Okay, he had me now. I'd have believed him if he'd told me the world was round, instead of flat. What he actually said was nowhere near as preposterous as that.

"Yes, I died saving Nebula's life. But Hercules did go mad and vow to destroy the Gods. After all, why else would they have deserted Greece, as they have, if not in fear of his return? And he will return, make no mistake about it."

I didn't much like that idea. Iolaus had loved Hercules. What might happen if the demi-God were back in the picture? Would Iolaus go back to him, mad or not? Or draw him into his following as a favorite?

I don't know if my face reflected my feelings or whether Iolaus was able to pick up on them some other way, but he raised an eyebrow questioningly as he looked at me. His grip on my shoulder tightened and he pulled my lips against his for another kiss that left me almost literally drooling for more. Then he laughed briefly.

"Trust me," he said, one hand holding either side of my head as he looked into my eyes. "You don't have to worry about the bastard son of Zeus."

"So why aren't you dead?" I was determined to have an answer, even if it meant that he'd stomp out of the room in a fury right then and there.

"You really want to know?" 

He leaned forward, as if to kiss me again.

"Yes," I said, before he could follow through on his obvious intentions.

With a theatrically-exasperated sigh, he trailed one hand around the side of my neck and began unfastening the neck of my shirt. "Okay, I died," he murmured softly. "But Zeus offered me the chance to come back, if I promised to stop his son from carrying out his insane crusade against the Gods."

"Why didn't you just tell us that? It sounds perfectly reasonable to me."

He shook his head. "Too complicated. The common folk might feel a little edgy about someone rising from the dead and all. Better to give them something simpler to believe. Besides, how does it look if Zeus charges me with stopping Hercules, then he and all the other Gods just take a hike? Doesn't seem as if he has all that much confidence in me, does it?"

I couldn't disagree with that. My shirt was open to the waist now.

"But you believe me, don't you?" he asked, his fingers tracing an incandescent path down the center of my chest.

"Oh, yes," I replied, trying hard to breathe.

"And you won't doubt me anymore, will you?"

His fingers had found my groin, and closed softly around my quivering penis and tight scrotum.

"No," I barely managed to gasp. "Oh, no."

"Good," he said, as he turned my world into blazing ecstasy. "I knew you were mine."

 

Oh, yes. I was his, body and soul, from that day on. As his following grew among the people of Corinth and the surrounding countryside, I was right there by his side.

I had no shame. I followed him around like a puppy dog, hoping he'd throw me a bone. And he did, from time to time. I knew perfectly well that I wasn't the only one of his disciples whose bed he frequented, but that didn't matter. As long as I was one of those chosen to be rewarded with his presence, it was fine with me. Sometimes it involved more than one of us at a time. I didn't care. I did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, with whomever he wanted, male or female. 

I was one of the inner circle, helping him plan, coming up with catchy phrases for his sermons, and supplying money when he asked for it. It was the happiest time of my life, and it didn't last long enough.

Okay, about now you're probably going to ask me how I could have been such a fool. All I can say is that I had no idea what was truly going on, when I first got into it. Remember, I really didn't know Iolaus all that well, having only met him a short time before his death and having spent a mere couple of days with him. It didn't occur to me to question my good fortune at having him back again.

At least, it didn't occur to me right away, in that first blaze of glory, lust, and ecstasy that he inspired. A few niggling objections surfaced in my mind now and then, but I squelched them. I wanted him to be what he said he was. I wanted it desperately.

However, it wasn't long before I found that fervent promise not to doubt him very hard to keep. The next campaign the God of Light decided to pursue was to round up the local scholars and convince them to see the light also. I had no real problems with that, as they caved in to the pressure fairly easily. It was only when he said we were going to clean out the libraries and burn the scrolls that those nasty little questions poked themselves into my mind once again.

It came to a head when I found myself actually standing next to Iolaus as his followers carried armloads of scrolls out of one of the scholar's houses, dumping them in the street in a chaotic pile. I learned some things about myself that day that I'd rather not have known.

"Do we really have to do this?" I asked him in a carefully-guarded undertone, as another load was tossed down in front of us. "I've read a lot of these writings. There's historic stuff here that shouldn't be casually destroyed."

"Euphonius, didn't you agree with me when I told you about the danger that the scholars and intellectuals pose to us?" he replied in a long-suffering tone.

"Yes, but this is different." I kept my voice barely above a whisper, not wanting any of the others to overhear. That might have been awkward.

"Well, there's something even more dangerous than those scholars," he went on, his face frozen in a confidently-benevolent expression as he beamed at the people adding more scrolls to the growing pile, "and that's their ideas. The writings on these parchments would lead impressionable folks to challenge my teachings. These ancient authorities and self-styled experts babble on endlessly about confusing philosophies, poorly thought out systems of ethics, and stupid morals. We have to sweep all this outdated nonsense away, to make way for the new dispensation." He picked up a scroll which lay at his feet. Shaking it open, he bunched up the parchment in his hands and ripped it in pieces, then tossed the pieces disdainfully back onto the pile. He smiled and said loudly, "You can't build a new world without destroying the old one. Give me the torch."

One of the white-robed flunkies did as he was ordered. I just stood there frozen as Iolaus waved the flaming torch above his head, to the cheers of the crowd. Then he lowered the torch and placed it in my hand, closing my fingers around it and holding them there.

"I want you to prove your devotion to me, Euphonius," he said very softly, the beneficent smile still on his face, as the crowd began chanting his name.

I almost tried to pull away, but knew it would be futile. He's not any taller than I am, but he's one heck of a lot stronger. "Please," I begged, tears coming to my eyes.

The midday sunlight gleamed in his blonde hair so that it formed a golden halo around his face. The flickering torch made his black eyes glitter like precious gems. This was the very vision of my God of Light. He was my hero, my love, my leader, and my master.

He leaned close, as if he were bestowing a kiss on an honored disciple.

"Do it!" he said, his voice a mere breath against my ear. 

May the Gods forgive me. I did it. As the parchment flared and burned, the crowd went wild, dancing in a maniacal frenzy around the makeshift bonfire. Iolaus stood beside me, one arm around my waist. I vowed never to question him again, but still the tears ran down my face unbidden, and a cold dead feeling was born in a walled-off corner of my heart.

It wasn't long after that when the beginning of the end arrived. 

We expected Hercules to return to Greece, so when the word came that he was actually in Corinth, we were prepared. Iolaus was out in the streets walking with his followers when we heard the shouts. He was carrying a young boy in his arms, much to the devoted mother's delight, and we were just the other side of the elaborate archway that led into the marketplace. 

He turned to me where I stood in my usual place, a bit behind him and off to his right, and smiled. "Now it begins," he said softly.

Waving his disciples aside, he made his way through the gathering crowd to confront the demi-God. I had no idea at the time who the two women were who stood there with Hercules, but I found out later.

"The Day of Reckoning is at hand," Iolaus announced loudly. "But fear not, my children. I will save you from Hercules."

As the crowd voiced its appreciation and relief, he leaned over toward me and placed the child he was carrying in my arms. "Ditch the kid," he muttered in an undertone.

I gave the boy back to his adoring mother as Iolaus went on to exhort Hercules to leave and not hurt anyone, offering to help him repent and accusing him of killing the Druids and scaring the Olympian Gods away.

During all this, I stood there watching Hercules' reactions. I have to confess I enjoyed it immensely. I didn't even have to admit that I hated the demi-God for the place he had held in Iolaus' heart. I could hate him for being the insane berserker Iolaus told us he was, come to ravage Greece and overthrow the reign of the God of Light.

Trouble was, he didn't act insane. Or even violent, for that matter. Well, perhaps it was a show. Evil is crafty and devious when pursuing its ends.

Iolaus finished by telling Hercules that the least he could do was allow these people the freedom to worship in peace.

As the demi-God and his friends skulked off, Iolaus seemed to have gotten the best of this first encounter, much to my delight.

 

Later that day, something happened that failed to delight me by a long shot. I was sitting in my room in the newest and fanciest temple we had recently taken over, contemplating whether I wanted to have a slice of the exotic green kiwifruit or the orange mango on the gold platter before me. Or maybe just the plain old grapes in the silver bowl. I wasn't very hungry; just in the mood for a snack.

Iolaus came striding in the door, rubbing his hands together in satisfaction. Sitting down next to me, he grabbed the bunch of grapes and began popping them into his mouth. "I did it," he said cheerfully.

"Did what?"

"I've got Nebula on our side."

"Nebula? What are you talking about?"

He smiled around the mouthful of purple fruit. "You mean you didn't recognize her? No, I guess not. You've never met her. Sorry. That stunning dark-skinned woman who was with Hercules earlier today. Surely you at least noticed her?"

I searched my memory. Yes, one of the two women fit that description. "She's the Queen of Sumeria?" I asked doubtfully. "Sure didn't look much like it to me."

"Oh, she's royalty, all right. Trust me. I know."

I really didn't like the self-satisfied expression on his face. He looked at me and laughed. "How'd you like to screw a queen, Euphonius? I'll share her with you, if you ask nicely."

Okay, I liked that even less. And I remembered the letter, and the way she had described her love for Iolaus.

"I have you. Why would I want anyone else?" I guess I sounded kind of stuffy here, because he laughed again.

"What's the matter? Jealous?" He held out a grape, dangling it in front of my mouth suggestively. 

Figuratively and literally, I took the bait, accepting the offered piece of fruit from his fingers, along with everything else that came with it. By the time we were finished, I'd stopped worrying about Nebula, or anybody else, for that matter.

 

However, I was a little worried about the worship service scheduled for early the following morning. Iolaus said he had something special planned, but refused to tell any of us what it was. 

The service itself started off pretty much the same way as most of them did, with the choir singing, and Iolaus' honeyed voice whipping his followers into further ecstasies of devotion. I watched from my usual vantage point, just around the corner of a low archway that framed a small side altar, not far from where the choir sat. I could keep an eye on everything from there, but remain pretty much unseen.

Iolaus was in great form that morning. His followers ate it up when he told them,   
"I'm gonna show you a world where the only crime is to not do whatever you wanna do! 'Do what thou wilt' shall be the whole of the Law."

I wished I could say I had been the one to come up with that particular phrase, but I can't. That one had been his idea.

When he reached the point of asking them, as he always did, "Do you accept me?", they went wild, chanting the expected response and thronging around to touch him, as they usually did.

Then something happened that I had not expected. After he'd calmed everyone down a bit and restored a semblance of order, he told them he needed their help with someone who would not accept the gift of freedom.

When the diminutive redhead I suddenly recognized as one of the women with Hercules was brought out and tied down on the altar, I got a bad feeling about what was going on. Nebula came with her, taking a place all too familiarly beside my God of Light.

All I could do was watch in stunned disbelief as Iolaus leaned over his victim, whispering something I couldn't hear and laying aside his stole. He even kissed her on the forehead. Then Nebula said a few words to him, drew her knife and raised it above the helpless woman.

I suppose I should have objected or done something to stop it. I'm afraid that thought never occurred to me. I was simply too surprised to do more than stare.

The knife descended, cutting through the bonds that held the woman in place instead of through her body. The temple doors burst open. Hercules stormed in, accompanied by several people.

"All right, Dahok! Now it's your turn to pray!" the demi-God shouted.

The grey-haired man standing next to him raised his staff and proclaimed into the shocked silence, "Deception is the will and the way of darkness! The power of grace is upon you!"

I glanced at Iolaus and saw his eyes glow bright red. His followers seemed to go mad, rushing at the newcomers and attacking them fiercely. The choir started singing. The world went insane.

I stared at the resulting melee from the safety of my vantage point. Then a bunch of crazed disciples rushed out from behind me, dragging me along with them.

As you may have imagined, hand-to-hand fighting isn't my strong point. I found myself swept toward the gray-haired man, who wasted no time whacking me in the face with his staff, as he was doing to everyone else. I flew backwards into my archway, colliding with the wall alongside the small altar and crumpling to the floor.

I came to slowly, with this incredible pain wrapped around my head. My right eye didn't seem to want to open. When I reached up to touch it, I found it was swollen almost shut. My fingers came away red and sticky with the half-dried blood that had run down my face from a gash on my forehead. The back of my head hurt too, and further exploration revealed a tender lump the size of a small egg. I must have hit it when I'd hit the wall.

As I struggled to sit up, I heard voices. At first I couldn't quite follow what they were saying, but I figured I'd be better off keeping quiet and out of sight until I knew what was going on. After all, the last I'd seen, there had been an all-out battle going on. I had no idea which side had won.

Crawling across the floor, I pulled myself up on the rough stones and peeked carefully around the side of the archway.

Iolaus lay on the main altar, held down by heavy silver chains at his wrists and ankles. Blue light streamed over him from the tip of that same damn staff that had laid me low, which was now standing upright between him and the stained glass windows. Hercules, Nebula, and a couple of the others stood over him.

Guess my side had lost the battle. This wasn't good.

Trying to clear the cobwebs of pain and confusion from my brain, I concentrated hard on what was going on. The first coherent thing I could pick out was Iolaus' voice, sounding somehow deeper and rougher than usual. Maybe it was my ears playing tricks on me, due to the head injury?

"Zarathustra," he said to the grey-haired man who had knocked me out, "have a thousand winters taught you nothing? I'm as much a part of this world as the light that warms the day."

Okay, that made absolutely no sense to me. Not at the time, at any rate. Later, I'd have reason to remember what I'd heard, and think some long and terrible thoughts about it. But that came afterwards. This was now.

Black dots swam across my vision. I shook my head, trying to clear them away, and immediately regretted it. I settled for blinking the only eye that I could keep open, trying to make out what was going on. I wasn't close enough to see him very clearly, but Iolaus looked extremely frazzled and bedraggled, and that was putting it nicely.

He started saying something totally incomprehensible and writhing around on the altar as if someone had stuck a red-hot poker up his ass. Lightning flashed wildly and loud claps of thunder split the air. Everything shook. 

I lost my grip on the edge of the arch and fell down, striking my battered head against the floor as I did so. For an unknown length of time, everything went mercifully black.

When I came to again and summoned enough courage to drag myself to my feet and look, the only ones still there were Iolaus and Hercules. 

Iolaus was half-sitting, propped on his elbows as well as he could considering the chains that bound his wrists. Since he was facing pretty much in my direction, I got a good look at him this time. His robe was unlaced and open, and there was an odd symbol painted on his chest. No, not painted: carved into the flesh and outlined in dried blood.

I winced.

Hercules said something about getting through to Iolaus. That made no more sense to me than anything else that had happened.

Iolaus shook his head. "Uh-uh. Zarathustra was the only one who knew how to perform the ritual. Now it's just you and me – buddy." He laughed, low and horribly.

The conversation got even more confusing after that. They were talking about Iolaus as if he weren't there, for one thing. I clung sickly to the rough stones of the archway, trying to get my sluggish brain to put the pieces together into some sort of coherent pattern.

"Iolaus would never invite you into his heart," Hercules said. "Why don't you tell me how you seduced my friend?"

Huh?

"Why should I tell you anything?"

"Because I don't believe you."

"Then I'll do better than tell you, Hercules. I'll show you."

I'm not really sure what happened then. I know I collapsed when everything turned red. After that, a pretty strange scenario played out in my head. It was as if I wasn't really there, just watching it all, like you do a play on a stage. It started with Iolaus dying in Hercules' arms, with the demi-God's name on his lips. It only got stranger from there.

You've most likely heard the basic story yourself, since there have been numerous bards reciting various versions. If all those tales didn't share an essential sameness with what I experienced, I'd have been tempted to believe I'd imagined the whole thing. As it is, I have to believe it happened, but don't ask me how or where. Or even why I saw it, except maybe that the psychic overflow was just so powerful that it spilled over onto me simply because I was fairly nearby.

I'll spare you the details, since I'm sure you know them. Let's just say I was totally confused at first. Then Iolaus mentioned Dahok, as if he was talking to him, not Hercules, as he appeared to be doing.

Dahok? What on earth did Dahok have to do with anything? I'd heard the name earlier, come to think of it. Hercules had said it, when he'd interrupted our service. And I'd heard it even before then, in connection with some very nasty tales about a warrior princess and her companion. Dahok was certainly not something I'd want to meet in a dark alley. Or anyplace else, for that matter.

And then, as I watched the drama play out, I realized that I'd already met Dahok. In fact, I'd done one heck of a lot more than meet him. My heart went cold at that thought. I was very surprised when it continued beating.

Things jumped back and forth between scenes of Iolaus talking to something that looked like Hercules, and the real Hercules here at the temple, talking to something that looked like Iolaus. Strangely enough, a lot of what the phony Hercules said to Iolaus was true. That made it even more awful, somehow.

When Iolaus finally gave in to Dahok's offer of enough power to make the world a better place, the strange visions faded. I found myself still lying on the floor behind the archway, sick at heart and shivering with exhaustion and pain.

A wave of revulsion that was almost physical swept over me, as I had no choice but to realize that I had fallen for a temptation far less noble than the one that had trapped Iolaus. I had sold myself, not for an opportunity to make the world right, but for nothing more than my own lust, and the chance to be free from all constraints, even the necessary ones.

If I had been summoned into Hades' presence then and there, I'd have made no objection. I'd have deserved it, for being such a fool. 

There was a lot of noise and shouting going on in the temple, but I had no idea what it meant. I was past the point of caring, lost in my own private morass of self-hatred.

Then something even more awful than revulsion raked through my ravaged mind, and a voice spoke inside my head in a way I hope I never hear again in my life.

"Euphonius? You're here? Ah, yes, you're over there. Good. I need your help. Get up. Jump out as if you're going to kill Hercules."

Me? Kill Hercules? Ridiculous, I thought back, still trying to make sense of what was going on in my addled brain.

"No, you idiot! Just try, that's all I need. Break his concentration so I can get at him. Distract him! Or he's going to do something I don't want him to do." 

I didn't even try to voice a refusal. I just willed my body not to move.

His voice changed. Suddenly, he sounded just like the Iolaus I had known. "I thought you loved me, Euphonius. Come on. Do it!"

May the Gods forgive me. I was tempted. 

Then I heard another voice in my head, a voice that didn't belong to Dahok, but to the man called Zarathustra: "Deception is the will and the way of darkness!" 

You're lying to me, I replied, just as you lied to Iolaus.

The voice went back to being Dahok's. "What can I offer you, my friend?" he asked seductively, "What do I have that you *really* want, more than anything else in the world?"

That was easy. "Iolaus."

"Fine. Do what I want, and you can have him. It'll be just the way it used to be. Do it now! Move! Attack Hercules!"

I took what little courage I had and focused it all into my reply. No. I don't mean I want Iolaus for myself. I mean I want his freedom. From you.

The laugh that rang through my head turned my blood to ice.

"No chance, asshole. If you won't help me, I have no further use for you."

The pain in my head multiplied itself by about a thousand, then squared that sum. I had no idea I could hurt so much and still be alive. I stumbled backwards as if I'd been thrown, coming up against the small altar behind me and tumbling clear over it and down to the floor, taking most of the things on the altar with me. I probably did my own imitation of hot-poker-up-the-ass writhing, at that point, and I doubt very much that I was breathing.

Then it cut off as suddenly as it had come, as if Dahok had been forced to direct his attentions to something more important than my death. 

I just lay there in the narrow space between the altar and the wall, curled into a ball and gasping for breath. Every muscle in my body hurt, and a couple of them were cramped up something fierce. I don't think I could have moved if my life depended on it. Blood trickled into my one good eye from the reopened cut on my forehead. Black fog blurred the edges of what little vision I had left.

Seared on the black nothingness that closed in around me, I saw more pictures. Hercules and Iolaus, fighting something I didn't even want to get a clear look at, finally tossing it into a pit of flame. Bright light, and the guy with the staff, whose name I now knew to be Zarathustra. Hercules and Iolaus, hugging each other as if they'd never let go. 

And Iolaus, standing in that searing brightness, one hand lifted in a gesture of farewell, as Zarathustra's voice said, "You were right, Hercules. The Impulse to Create does have a name."

That was it. Mercifully, I passed out again.

When the curtain of blackness drew away, I was still in the same place, but I didn't hurt quite so much. Definite improvement, that.

I pulled myself up to my knees. I heard muffled sounds, as if there were quite a few people nearby. Fortunately, no one had noticed me, since I'd been pretty much out of sight on the floor behind the small altar. Cautiously, I peeked over the top. Yep, lots of people out in the main part of the temple. Not good. How was I going to get out of here without being seen, as I much preferred to do at this point?

First thing was to get cleaned up a bit. One of the brass vases that had been on the altar lay on its side next to me, flowers mostly strewn about the floor in a puddle of water. But there was still quite a bit of water inside the vase. Using that and the scarf I had around my neck, I managed to wipe most of the dried blood out of my eyes and off my face. The white altar cloth hung skewed and sideways, so I pulled it off, careful to slide the one remaining candlestick off the cloth and leave it in its proper place. Arranging the cloth over my head and around my shoulders like a makeshift cowl to hide my bruised face, I crawled to one side of the altar and rose slowly to my feet. It took a moment for the world to stop spinning, but I leaned against the wall and used that moment to check out the situation.

The main body of the temple was full of people, as I had previously noticed. They were sitting on the stone benches, squatting in the aisles, and standing against the walls, all facing towards the main altar. I recognized some of them as followers of Iolaus. 

No, I corrected myself firmly, not Iolaus. Dahok. Don't ever forget that.

No one took any notice of me as I took a few shaky steps toward the archway, hoping to mingle with the crowd and sneak away. This was good. The last thing I needed was to be recognized as one of the more active people in the cult, since I now knew what it had really been all about. I felt like a first-prize piece of shit, or worse. All I wanted was to skulk away and hide in a deep, dark hole somewhere.

But first I had to get out of there. I moved around the side of the arch, joining the others standing by the wall. The crowd was fairly quiet, but most people were crying. Some of the women were wailing in grief. I wasn't real sure I wanted to look in the direction of the main altar, but I knew I had to. I propped my back against the cold stone behind me and raised my eyes.

Iolaus' body was there, but he wasn't tied and spread-eagled, nor was he wearing the white robe. He was covered almost to his chin by a heavy gold cloth. Someone had evidently cleaned up the corpse and arranged it in a much more peaceful position. 

As I looked at what was left of Iolaus, somewhere in my heart a small piece of me turned to blue crystal ice, ice that burned like fire. I'll get you for this, Dahok, I vowed, recalling that half-glimpsed monstrosity I had seen falling into the firepit. You are my sworn enemy. Now and forever!

I could see Hercules kneeling beside the altar, his forehead pressed against the cold stone. Nebula knelt next to him, her shoulders shaking with her sobs. I saw the big man put his arm around Nebula and draw her close against his side, as much for his comfort as for hers, I think.

Although I wasn't really sure how I felt about the demi-God, I knew my heart bled for him that day. Yes, I had cared deeply for Iolaus. But my feelings were as nothing compared to how Hercules must have felt. This was his long-time friend and companion, and his lover. And now he had to mourn Iolaus' passing for the second time, and remember always what he had had to do to lay his beloved to rest.

I had thought I had no more tears to shed, but, watching Hercules and Nebula kneeling there together, I found out that wasn't true. Sinking down to the floor, I let myself feel the grief that had gathered inside me. I wanted to run screaming to the altar and throw myself onto the body lying there, but that would do no good. I had no right to such a melodramatic display.

The only thing I could do to keep myself even marginally sane was to recall that last vision I'd seen of Iolaus, waving good-bye. Yes, the man I had known and loved was dead, but I knew he was safe in the Light forever. What more can you wish for someone, if you truly love them?

Except, of course, to have them with you always. 

 

CLOSEST TO YOUR HEART

I am the darkness that you hold closest to your heart.

 

I was at Erytheia's house when the message arrived, brought by a grizzled old sailor. Ever since Iolaus had left town after his all too brief reunion with his mother, she and I had become friends. Erytheia had asked me over for lunch that day, as she often did when I wasn't off travelling, and she was bustling around at the stove.

Women like me, even though I'm not much attracted to them. I'm a good listener, and I always take their words very seriously, something most men haven't realized they need to do. Besides, Erytheia and I share a common interest: her son.

Anyway, my mouth was already watering in anticipation of one of her excellent meals when a knock came at the door.

"I'll get it," I offered.

"No, that's all right, Euphonius. Stay where you are."

She opened the door and took the scroll, absently thanking the bearer. All the color drained from her face as she read it. I thought she was going to faint, so I put an arm around her waist and led her to a chair

"What is it? What's wrong?"

"Iolaus," she said, as the tears started running down her cheeks. 

I took up the parchment that had fallen from her limp fingers. It told me only what I had already guessed from Erytheia's reaction: Iolaus was dead. He died a hero, the letter said, sacrificing his life to save the Queen of Sumeria, who was the author of the message. He died in Hercules' arms, and was interred with great ceremony and honor. She wrote also of her love for him, this Queen.

In future years, I would hear all the details of Iolaus' death, embroidered, elaborated, exaggerated, and eulogized upon by many different bards. But none of that would hurt nearly so much as holding his mother in my arms while she cried, and cursed the Gods, who had taken her son from her just as she had been getting to know him once again. 

For her sake, I choked back my own sorrow over the man I had known for so short a time, but had found myself caring for so deeply, ever since that night he had shared my bed, while Hercules was away being a God on Mount Olympus. She knew about that, because I had told her after we had become friends. But Erytheia was his mother, and her grief took precedence over mine.

When Pandion came back from the village, I turned her over to him, leaving them to console each other, as it should be. I was, after all, just a friend of the family.

In a daze, I walked through the little village of Lydicea and down the road to my house just beyond the other side of the town, getting as far as the trees at the edge of my property before I broke down. By the time I got home, my hands were raw from pounding out my anger on the rough tree bark and I had no more curses to choke out to the uncaring universe. My housekeeper took one look at me and set her small daughter to heating water, in order to clean my hands and brew a calming tea. I couldn't even tell her what was wrong until several hours later.

I had originally planned to start out on a trip to Athens the next day, hoping to find a deal on some jewelry. I'm a merchant, but I only trade in quality merchandise. That way I don't have to work too hard at it, since one decent sale can keep me in dinars for months. But for that sort of thing to work, one has to know one's gems and precious metals, not to mention have connections to people with enough wealth to want to buy what I have to offer. It had taken me the biggest part of my 45 years to acquire the knowledge and the contacts, but I'd done it. I'm reasonably well off. Now, I go to the various markets and bazaars, travelling inconspicuously and modestly and trusting my instincts to tell me when that rare piece of truly valuable jewelry shows up in the unsuspecting hands of someone who has no idea of its worth.

This being the case, I spend a lot of time away from my home in Lydicea, leaving it in the care of Ysabel, the housekeeper I just mentioned, a middle-aged widow whose husband died in the Trojan War.

Under normal circumstances, I enjoy my itinerant lifestyle and would have been more than ready to hit the road once again. Now, however, the news of Iolaus' death sent me into a funk. I moped around the house, unable to work up any real interest in anything. I tried to tell myself this was stupid. I barely knew the man. Yes, he had helped me deal with the death of my father, when Apollo came to town and started tossing fireballs around. And, yes, as I've mentioned, we had spent one night together, when he'd thought he'd lost Hercules to Olympus. But that was it. There was no logical reason why his death should hurt me so badly. It made no sense, and yet, the weeks went by, and my apathy only grew worse.

Before Iolaus died, I had been able to imagine our paths might cross again. Before, I had been able to listen to the travelling bards tell of Hercules' exploits, always with my heart and mind focused on the actions of his little blonde sidekick, although most of the audiences didn't even seem to care what happened to the brave mortal warrior, who stood faithfully in the shadow of the famous half-God hero. Before, I had been able to picture that bright smile and heroic heart, happy with the companion and lover he had chosen. Shit, before I had even been able to picture the two of them together, bodies interlaced and entwined as they sought pleasure in each other. I try not to give in to jealousy. I knew I could never take him away from Hercules. But there were times I thought I'd give my soul if I could.

And yet, the honest truth still remained that I barely knew the man, so why did his death hit me so hard?

I had no answers. The weeks went by, and I was at home. Ysabel worried and fussed over me, to no avail.

It almost seemed the countryside shared my grief, as a fierce drought swept the land, bringing the threat of famine in its wake. Everyone was on edge and anxious, wondering what was happening. The Gods turned deaf ears to the desperate pleas of their followers. No answers came from Olympus. It was even rumored that they had fled Greece.

 

The night I dreamed about Iolaus, it didn't surprise me all that much. I'd dreamed about my father fairly often in the months after his death and some of those dreams had been so real that it was frightening, even when the dreams themselves had been essentially happy ones.

That's why I wasn't particularly surprised to find Iolaus leaning over me, kissing his way down my chest towards my groin. (To be perfectly honest, I'd had that sort of dream a number of times even before he had died. You know how it is.) 

His mouth closed over my already hard cock and I was loving every minute of it, until it dawned on me that something wasn't quite right here. 

"Uh – Iolaus -- you're dead," I said flatly, reacting much as I usually did to the dream images of my father. That realization was generally enough to wake me up, but it didn't work this time.

His mouth left my straining cock, to be replaced immediately by his fingers.

"Yeah," he replied agreeably. "So what?"

"Uh -- so we shouldn't be doing this?" I suggested, taken aback by his casual attitude.

"You're enjoying it, aren't you?"

That was an incredible understatement for what I was feeling. It was all I could do to keep talking as my body squirmed under his expert touch.

"But this is only a dream," I tried to point out reasonably.

"And I suppose you've never had a wet dream before?" he asked, with a smile that was somehow twice as seductive as I remembered it to be. "About me?"

I'd have been lying through my teeth if I'd denied that.

His golden head ducked down once more towards my groin, but an uneasiness came sneaking into my mind, outweighing even the glorious sensation of his tongue licking my cock. This whole thing was starting to seem all too real for me.

"There's something wrong here," I objected, although not very forcefully.

"Euphonius," he asked archly, "do you really want me to stop what I'm doing?"

"Yes." 

He stopped, propped his head up on one hand, and just lay there looking at me. I was too far gone to leave it at that, and he knew it.

"Uh –- I mean, no."

"I didn't think so."

His mouth returned to where it had been, only this time he went down on me with a vengeance, taking my cock entirely into his mouth and sucking hard, even as he stuck one finger up my ass.

"Oh Gods!" I gasped, as I came. 

I was still trying to catch my breath when he moved to lie on top of me. Looking down at my face, he smiled and kissed me very gently. I felt his erection pressed against my groin.

"Want me to keep going?" he asked, sounding very confident of the answer.

By now my mind was clearer. "No." I took hold of his shoulders and pushed him far enough away that I could focus my eyes on him. "What's going on?"

A quick flash of annoyance crossed his face, gone almost before I was sure I had seen it.

"Nothing's going on," he replied. "Isn't it enough that I'm here? One of the advantages of being dead is that I can hear it when someone thinks about me, and you've been thinking about me a lot, haven't you?"

"You know that?"

"I know more than that." The seductive grin was back. One finger traced delicately over my lips as he went on. "You'd like to take me away from Hercules, wouldn't you? Well, here's your chance."

I shook my head. "Somehow, I don't believe that."

The grin slipped a notch, and his eyes turned solid black.

"Are you refusing me, Euphonius?" 

There was a tone in his voice that I'd never heard before. This was becoming very strange. 

"No," I replied. "I could never do that. Dead or alive or anything in between, I want you."

That seemed to satisfy him. The darkness left his eyes.

"But I need to know what's going on," I persisted. "Why are you here? What do you want?"

He kissed me, fast and hard enough that my lip split against his teeth. Then he leaned back and looked down at me.

"All in good time, my friend. All in good time. Let's just say, you haven't seen the last of me yet. Come to Corinth. You'll find me there."

An instant later, he was gone and I was alone in my bed. I sat up in shock, staring around in the dim light of the gibbous moon that hung just outside my window. The whole thing couldn't have happened. I had been asleep, that was all. 

My lip hurt. When I touched it, there was blood running down my chin. That's when it occurred to me that, if this had been nothing more than another wet dream, why wasn't the lower part of me –- uh -- wet?

Do I really need to tell you that I started out for Corinth the following morning? 

 

I had no idea of what I was going to find, but it surpassed all my hopes and imaginings. Almost as if something were guiding my steps, I was drawn to a small temple. I don't even recall to which God it was dedicated. Or should I say, had been dedicated? It was obviously under new management now.

I went inside, still somewhat puzzled as to what I was doing there. I almost fainted dead away from shock when I heard Iolaus' voice and caught sight of him standing in front of a group of people, exhorting them about something. I didn't even notice what he was saying, so caught up was I in simply staring at him. (Not that it mattered what he said. All that mattered was that he was standing there saying it.)

He looked gorgeous, in a white floor-length robe with wide sleeves. The stole around his neck was decorated with red, white, and gold sunburst patterns and he wore heavy gold bracelets on his wrists. On top of all that, his hair was combed back more neatly than I was accustomed to seeing it and seemed a bit shorter and less wild.

My mouth was probably still hanging open in surprise as I worked my way into the small crowd listening to him. I had to find out more about this. The young woman next to me was staring up at him with a rapt expression on her face, so I figured she might make a good informant.

Leaning close to her, I asked in a whisper, "Excuse me, but can you tell me what's going on here?"

"This is Iolaus, the God of Light," she replied, voice as rapt as her face. "He's come to offer us salvation."

"Iolaus? The one who was Hercules' friend?"

"Yes. Hercules went crazy while they were in Sumeria," she told me, eyes still fixed on her saviour, as if reciting a familiar formula. "When he vowed to destroy the Olympian Gods, Iolaus ate ambrosia in order to become a God himself. Now he has returned, to save Greece from the insane son of Zeus."

That didn't quite jibe with what I knew, but I kept quiet, only nodding sagely at the information.

The God of Light concluded his sermon by asking his followers if they accepted him. Without fully realizing I was doing it, I responded with the others, "Now and forever!"

He smiled benevolently, then walked down among the people, who reached out to him, ecstatically happy if he deigned to touch or take notice of one of them. I watched from off to the side. I was still standing there leaning against a column when he dismissed his followers and they went off about their business.

He looked at me, then walked over, his face glowing with apparent delight. The eyes I remembered as blue were solid black, which somehow served to make him look more devastatingly desirable than usual.

"You came," was all he said.

I barely had the presence of mind to reply, "Was there ever any doubt?"

"No, not really." He laughed and draped an arm around my shoulders, leading me out of the main part of the temple, down a short hallway, and into a small, well-appointed room. I wasn't really surprised when he pulled me into an embrace and kissed me hard on the mouth. I guess I didn't respond as enthusiastically as he expected, because he broke off abruptly, held me at arm's length, and studied me with a funny look on his face.

"Okay, what is it? What's wrong?" he finally asked.

"Iolaus, I –- uh –- I know what really happened in Sumeria. I read the letter."

"What letter?" he asked guardedly.

"The letter Queen Nebula sent to your mother. I was there when it arrived."

"I see. That explains how you knew I was dead, before it became general knowledge." His voice turned strange, and scarlet fire glowed behind the blackness of his eyes. "And what exactly is it that you think you know about Sumeria?" 

"I know you died saving the queen's life, and were embalmed and interred according to the local customs. You didn't just eat ambrosia and become a God, the way you told these people."

He considered that for a while, still studying me with a speculative look on his face. Then the fire in his eyes faded away and he grinned. 

"You're right. It didn't happen that way at all."

That really wasn't the sort of answer I'd expected. Before I even realized it, I blurted out, "So why have you lied about it?"

He shook his head, still smiling. 

"Euphonius, there's something you've got to understand about religion," he said in a confidential tone. "There's the official dogma, the pretty story that gets told to the masses because that's all they're capable of understanding. Then there are the real truths, the secrets that are revealed only to true disciples, believers who are able to see beyond the surface, people I can trust." Still smiling, he drew me down next to him on a brocade-covered couch. "People such as you."

Okay, he had me now. I'd have believed him if he'd told me the world was round, instead of flat. What he actually said was nowhere near as preposterous as that.

"Yes, I died saving Nebula's life. But Hercules did go mad and vow to destroy the Gods. After all, why else would they have deserted Greece, as they have, if not in fear of his return? And he will return, make no mistake about it."

I didn't much like that idea. Iolaus had loved Hercules. What might happen if the demi-God were back in the picture? Would Iolaus go back to him, mad or not? Or draw him into his following as a favorite?

I don't know if my face reflected my feelings or whether Iolaus was able to pick up on them some other way, but he raised an eyebrow questioningly as he looked at me. His grip on my shoulder tightened and he pulled my lips against his for another kiss that left me almost literally drooling for more. Then he laughed briefly.

"Trust me," he said, one hand holding either side of my head as he looked into my eyes. "You don't have to worry about the bastard son of Zeus."

"So why aren't you dead?" I was determined to have an answer, even if it meant that he'd stomp out of the room in a fury right then and there.

"You really want to know?" 

He leaned forward, as if to kiss me again.

"Yes," I said, before he could follow through on his obvious intentions.

With a theatrically-exasperated sigh, he trailed one hand around the side of my neck and began unfastening the neck of my shirt. "Okay, I died," he murmured softly. "But Zeus offered me the chance to come back, if I promised to stop his son from carrying out his insane crusade against the Gods."

"Why didn't you just tell us that? It sounds perfectly reasonable to me."

He shook his head. "Too complicated. The common folk might feel a little edgy about someone rising from the dead and all. Better to give them something simpler to believe. Besides, how does it look if Zeus charges me with stopping Hercules, then he and all the other Gods just take a hike? Doesn't seem as if he has all that much confidence in me, does it?"

I couldn't disagree with that. My shirt was open to the waist now.

"But you believe me, don't you?" he asked, his fingers tracing an incandescent path down the center of my chest.

"Oh, yes," I replied, trying hard to breathe.

"And you won't doubt me anymore, will you?"

His fingers had found my groin, and closed softly around my quivering penis and tight scrotum.

"No," I barely managed to gasp. "Oh, no."

"Good," he said, as he turned my world into blazing ecstasy. "I knew you were mine."

 

Oh, yes. I was his, body and soul, from that day on. As his following grew among the people of Corinth and the surrounding countryside, I was right there by his side.

I had no shame. I followed him around like a puppy dog, hoping he'd throw me a bone. And he did, from time to time. I knew perfectly well that I wasn't the only one of his disciples whose bed he frequented, but that didn't matter. As long as I was one of those chosen to be rewarded with his presence, it was fine with me. Sometimes it involved more than one of us at a time. I didn't care. I did whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, with whomever he wanted, male or female. 

I was one of the inner circle, helping him plan, coming up with catchy phrases for his sermons, and supplying money when he asked for it. It was the happiest time of my life, and it didn't last long enough.

Okay, about now you're probably going to ask me how I could have been such a fool. All I can say is that I had no idea what was truly going on, when I first got into it. Remember, I really didn't know Iolaus all that well, having only met him a short time before his death and having spent a mere couple of days with him. It didn't occur to me to question my good fortune at having him back again.

At least, it didn't occur to me right away, in that first blaze of glory, lust, and ecstasy that he inspired. A few niggling objections surfaced in my mind now and then, but I squelched them. I wanted him to be what he said he was. I wanted it desperately.

However, it wasn't long before I found that fervent promise not to doubt him very hard to keep. The next campaign the God of Light decided to pursue was to round up the local scholars and convince them to see the light also. I had no real problems with that, as they caved in to the pressure fairly easily. It was only when he said we were going to clean out the libraries and burn the scrolls that those nasty little questions poked themselves into my mind once again.

It came to a head when I found myself actually standing next to Iolaus as his followers carried armloads of scrolls out of one of the scholar's houses, dumping them in the street in a chaotic pile. I learned some things about myself that day that I'd rather not have known.

"Do we really have to do this?" I asked him in a carefully-guarded undertone, as another load was tossed down in front of us. "I've read a lot of these writings. There's historic stuff here that shouldn't be casually destroyed."

"Euphonius, didn't you agree with me when I told you about the danger that the scholars and intellectuals pose to us?" he replied in a long-suffering tone.

"Yes, but this is different." I kept my voice barely above a whisper, not wanting any of the others to overhear. That might have been awkward.

"Well, there's something even more dangerous than those scholars," he went on, his face frozen in a confidently-benevolent expression as he beamed at the people adding more scrolls to the growing pile, "and that's their ideas. The writings on these parchments would lead impressionable folks to challenge my teachings. These ancient authorities and self-styled experts babble on endlessly about confusing philosophies, poorly thought out systems of ethics, and stupid morals. We have to sweep all this outdated nonsense away, to make way for the new dispensation." He picked up a scroll which lay at his feet. Shaking it open, he bunched up the parchment in his hands and ripped it in pieces, then tossed the pieces disdainfully back onto the pile. He smiled and said loudly, "You can't build a new world without destroying the old one. Give me the torch."

One of the white-robed flunkies did as he was ordered. I just stood there frozen as Iolaus waved the flaming torch above his head, to the cheers of the crowd. Then he lowered the torch and placed it in my hand, closing my fingers around it and holding them there.

"I want you to prove your devotion to me, Euphonius," he said very softly, the beneficent smile still on his face, as the crowd began chanting his name.

I almost tried to pull away, but knew it would be futile. He's not any taller than I am, but he's one heck of a lot stronger. "Please," I begged, tears coming to my eyes.

The midday sunlight gleamed in his blonde hair so that it formed a golden halo around his face. The flickering torch made his black eyes glitter like precious gems. This was the very vision of my God of Light. He was my hero, my love, my leader, and my master.

He leaned close, as if he were bestowing a kiss on an honored disciple.

"Do it!" he said, his voice a mere breath against my ear. 

May the Gods forgive me. I did it. As the parchment flared and burned, the crowd went wild, dancing in a maniacal frenzy around the makeshift bonfire. Iolaus stood beside me, one arm around my waist. I vowed never to question him again, but still the tears ran down my face unbidden, and a cold dead feeling was born in a walled-off corner of my heart.

It wasn't long after that when the beginning of the end arrived. 

We expected Hercules to return to Greece, so when the word came that he was actually in Corinth, we were prepared. Iolaus was out in the streets walking with his followers when we heard the shouts. He was carrying a young boy in his arms, much to the devoted mother's delight, and we were just the other side of the elaborate archway that led into the marketplace. 

He turned to me where I stood in my usual place, a bit behind him and off to his right, and smiled. "Now it begins," he said softly.

Waving his disciples aside, he made his way through the gathering crowd to confront the demi-God. I had no idea at the time who the two women were who stood there with Hercules, but I found out later.

"The Day of Reckoning is at hand," Iolaus announced loudly. "But fear not, my children. I will save you from Hercules."

As the crowd voiced its appreciation and relief, he leaned over toward me and placed the child he was carrying in my arms. "Ditch the kid," he muttered in an undertone.

I gave the boy back to his adoring mother as Iolaus went on to exhort Hercules to leave and not hurt anyone, offering to help him repent and accusing him of killing the Druids and scaring the Olympian Gods away.

During all this, I stood there watching Hercules' reactions. I have to confess I enjoyed it immensely. I didn't even have to admit that I hated the demi-God for the place he had held in Iolaus' heart. I could hate him for being the insane berserker Iolaus told us he was, come to ravage Greece and overthrow the reign of the God of Light.

Trouble was, he didn't act insane. Or even violent, for that matter. Well, perhaps it was a show. Evil is crafty and devious when pursuing its ends.

Iolaus finished by telling Hercules that the least he could do was allow these people the freedom to worship in peace.

As the demi-God and his friends skulked off, Iolaus seemed to have gotten the best of this first encounter, much to my delight.

 

Later that day, something happened that failed to delight me by a long shot. I was sitting in my room in the newest and fanciest temple we had recently taken over, contemplating whether I wanted to have a slice of the exotic green kiwifruit or the orange mango on the gold platter before me. Or maybe just the plain old grapes in the silver bowl. I wasn't very hungry; just in the mood for a snack.

Iolaus came striding in the door, rubbing his hands together in satisfaction. Sitting down next to me, he grabbed the bunch of grapes and began popping them into his mouth. "I did it," he said cheerfully.

"Did what?"

"I've got Nebula on our side."

"Nebula? What are you talking about?"

He smiled around the mouthful of purple fruit. "You mean you didn't recognize her? No, I guess not. You've never met her. Sorry. That stunning dark-skinned woman who was with Hercules earlier today. Surely you at least noticed her?"

I searched my memory. Yes, one of the two women fit that description. "She's the Queen of Sumeria?" I asked doubtfully. "Sure didn't look much like it to me."

"Oh, she's royalty, all right. Trust me. I know."

I really didn't like the self-satisfied expression on his face. He looked at me and laughed. "How'd you like to screw a queen, Euphonius? I'll share her with you, if you ask nicely."

Okay, I liked that even less. And I remembered the letter, and the way she had described her love for Iolaus.

"I have you. Why would I want anyone else?" I guess I sounded kind of stuffy here, because he laughed again.

"What's the matter? Jealous?" He held out a grape, dangling it in front of my mouth suggestively. 

Figuratively and literally, I took the bait, accepting the offered piece of fruit from his fingers, along with everything else that came with it. By the time we were finished, I'd stopped worrying about Nebula, or anybody else, for that matter.

 

However, I was a little worried about the worship service scheduled for early the following morning. Iolaus said he had something special planned, but refused to tell any of us what it was. 

The service itself started off pretty much the same way as most of them did, with the choir singing, and Iolaus' honeyed voice whipping his followers into further ecstasies of devotion. I watched from my usual vantage point, just around the corner of a low archway that framed a small side altar, not far from where the choir sat. I could keep an eye on everything from there, but remain pretty much unseen.

Iolaus was in great form that morning. His followers ate it up when he told them,   
"I'm gonna show you a world where the only crime is to not do whatever you wanna do! 'Do what thou wilt' shall be the whole of the Law."

I wished I could say I had been the one to come up with that particular phrase, but I can't. That one had been his idea.

When he reached the point of asking them, as he always did, "Do you accept me?", they went wild, chanting the expected response and thronging around to touch him, as they usually did.

Then something happened that I had not expected. After he'd calmed everyone down a bit and restored a semblance of order, he told them he needed their help with someone who would not accept the gift of freedom.

When the diminutive redhead I suddenly recognized as one of the women with Hercules was brought out and tied down on the altar, I got a bad feeling about what was going on. Nebula came with her, taking a place all too familiarly beside my God of Light.

All I could do was watch in stunned disbelief as Iolaus leaned over his victim, whispering something I couldn't hear and laying aside his stole. He even kissed her on the forehead. Then Nebula said a few words to him, drew her knife and raised it above the helpless woman.

I suppose I should have objected or done something to stop it. I'm afraid that thought never occurred to me. I was simply too surprised to do more than stare.

The knife descended, cutting through the bonds that held the woman in place instead of through her body. The temple doors burst open. Hercules stormed in, accompanied by several people.

"All right, Dahok! Now it's your turn to pray!" the demi-God shouted.

The grey-haired man standing next to him raised his staff and proclaimed into the shocked silence, "Deception is the will and the way of darkness! The power of grace is upon you!"

I glanced at Iolaus and saw his eyes glow bright red. His followers seemed to go mad, rushing at the newcomers and attacking them fiercely. The choir started singing. The world went insane.

I stared at the resulting melee from the safety of my vantage point. Then a bunch of crazed disciples rushed out from behind me, dragging me along with them.

As you may have imagined, hand-to-hand fighting isn't my strong point. I found myself swept toward the gray-haired man, who wasted no time whacking me in the face with his staff, as he was doing to everyone else. I flew backwards into my archway, colliding with the wall alongside the small altar and crumpling to the floor.

I came to slowly, with this incredible pain wrapped around my head. My right eye didn't seem to want to open. When I reached up to touch it, I found it was swollen almost shut. My fingers came away red and sticky with the half-dried blood that had run down my face from a gash on my forehead. The back of my head hurt too, and further exploration revealed a tender lump the size of a small egg. I must have hit it when I'd hit the wall.

As I struggled to sit up, I heard voices. At first I couldn't quite follow what they were saying, but I figured I'd be better off keeping quiet and out of sight until I knew what was going on. After all, the last I'd seen, there had been an all-out battle going on. I had no idea which side had won.

Crawling across the floor, I pulled myself up on the rough stones and peeked carefully around the side of the archway.

Iolaus lay on the main altar, held down by heavy silver chains at his wrists and ankles. Blue light streamed over him from the tip of that same damn staff that had laid me low, which was now standing upright between him and the stained glass windows. Hercules, Nebula, and a couple of the others stood over him.

Guess my side had lost the battle. This wasn't good.

Trying to clear the cobwebs of pain and confusion from my brain, I concentrated hard on what was going on. The first coherent thing I could pick out was Iolaus' voice, sounding somehow deeper and rougher than usual. Maybe it was my ears playing tricks on me, due to the head injury?

"Zarathustra," he said to the grey-haired man who had knocked me out, "have a thousand winters taught you nothing? I'm as much a part of this world as the light that warms the day."

Okay, that made absolutely no sense to me. Not at the time, at any rate. Later, I'd have reason to remember what I'd heard, and think some long and terrible thoughts about it. But that came afterwards. This was now.

Black dots swam across my vision. I shook my head, trying to clear them away, and immediately regretted it. I settled for blinking the only eye that I could keep open, trying to make out what was going on. I wasn't close enough to see him very clearly, but Iolaus looked extremely frazzled and bedraggled, and that was putting it nicely.

He started saying something totally incomprehensible and writhing around on the altar as if someone had stuck a red-hot poker up his ass. Lightning flashed wildly and loud claps of thunder split the air. Everything shook. 

I lost my grip on the edge of the arch and fell down, striking my battered head against the floor as I did so. For an unknown length of time, everything went mercifully black.

When I came to again and summoned enough courage to drag myself to my feet and look, the only ones still there were Iolaus and Hercules. 

Iolaus was half-sitting, propped on his elbows as well as he could considering the chains that bound his wrists. Since he was facing pretty much in my direction, I got a good look at him this time. His robe was unlaced and open, and there was an odd symbol painted on his chest. No, not painted: carved into the flesh and outlined in dried blood.

I winced.

Hercules said something about getting through to Iolaus. That made no more sense to me than anything else that had happened.

Iolaus shook his head. "Uh-uh. Zarathustra was the only one who knew how to perform the ritual. Now it's just you and me – buddy." He laughed, low and horribly.

The conversation got even more confusing after that. They were talking about Iolaus as if he weren't there, for one thing. I clung sickly to the rough stones of the archway, trying to get my sluggish brain to put the pieces together into some sort of coherent pattern.

"Iolaus would never invite you into his heart," Hercules said. "Why don't you tell me how you seduced my friend?"

Huh?

"Why should I tell you anything?"

"Because I don't believe you."

"Then I'll do better than tell you, Hercules. I'll show you."

I'm not really sure what happened then. I know I collapsed when everything turned red. After that, a pretty strange scenario played out in my head. It was as if I wasn't really there, just watching it all, like you do a play on a stage. It started with Iolaus dying in Hercules' arms, with the demi-God's name on his lips. It only got stranger from there.

You've most likely heard the basic story yourself, since there have been numerous bards reciting various versions. If all those tales didn't share an essential sameness with what I experienced, I'd have been tempted to believe I'd imagined the whole thing. As it is, I have to believe it happened, but don't ask me how or where. Or even why I saw it, except maybe that the psychic overflow was just so powerful that it spilled over onto me simply because I was fairly nearby.

I'll spare you the details, since I'm sure you know them. Let's just say I was totally confused at first. Then Iolaus mentioned Dahok, as if he was talking to him, not Hercules, as he appeared to be doing.

Dahok? What on earth did Dahok have to do with anything? I'd heard the name earlier, come to think of it. Hercules had said it, when he'd interrupted our service. And I'd heard it even before then, in connection with some very nasty tales about a warrior princess and her companion. Dahok was certainly not something I'd want to meet in a dark alley. Or anyplace else, for that matter.

And then, as I watched the drama play out, I realized that I'd already met Dahok. In fact, I'd done one heck of a lot more than meet him. My heart went cold at that thought. I was very surprised when it continued beating.

Things jumped back and forth between scenes of Iolaus talking to something that looked like Hercules, and the real Hercules here at the temple, talking to something that looked like Iolaus. Strangely enough, a lot of what the phony Hercules said to Iolaus was true. That made it even more awful, somehow.

When Iolaus finally gave in to Dahok's offer of enough power to make the world a better place, the strange visions faded. I found myself still lying on the floor behind the archway, sick at heart and shivering with exhaustion and pain.

A wave of revulsion that was almost physical swept over me, as I had no choice but to realize that I had fallen for a temptation far less noble than the one that had trapped Iolaus. I had sold myself, not for an opportunity to make the world right, but for nothing more than my own lust, and the chance to be free from all constraints, even the necessary ones.

If I had been summoned into Hades' presence then and there, I'd have made no objection. I'd have deserved it, for being such a fool. 

There was a lot of noise and shouting going on in the temple, but I had no idea what it meant. I was past the point of caring, lost in my own private morass of self-hatred.

Then something even more awful than revulsion raked through my ravaged mind, and a voice spoke inside my head in a way I hope I never hear again in my life.

"Euphonius? You're here? Ah, yes, you're over there. Good. I need your help. Get up. Jump out as if you're going to kill Hercules."

Me? Kill Hercules? Ridiculous, I thought back, still trying to make sense of what was going on in my addled brain.

"No, you idiot! Just try, that's all I need. Break his concentration so I can get at him. Distract him! Or he's going to do something I don't want him to do." 

I didn't even try to voice a refusal. I just willed my body not to move.

His voice changed. Suddenly, he sounded just like the Iolaus I had known. "I thought you loved me, Euphonius. Come on. Do it!"

May the Gods forgive me. I was tempted. 

Then I heard another voice in my head, a voice that didn't belong to Dahok, but to the man called Zarathustra: "Deception is the will and the way of darkness!" 

You're lying to me, I replied, just as you lied to Iolaus.

The voice went back to being Dahok's. "What can I offer you, my friend?" he asked seductively, "What do I have that you *really* want, more than anything else in the world?"

That was easy. "Iolaus."

"Fine. Do what I want, and you can have him. It'll be just the way it used to be. Do it now! Move! Attack Hercules!"

I took what little courage I had and focused it all into my reply. No. I don't mean I want Iolaus for myself. I mean I want his freedom. From you.

The laugh that rang through my head turned my blood to ice.

"No chance, asshole. If you won't help me, I have no further use for you."

The pain in my head multiplied itself by about a thousand, then squared that sum. I had no idea I could hurt so much and still be alive. I stumbled backwards as if I'd been thrown, coming up against the small altar behind me and tumbling clear over it and down to the floor, taking most of the things on the altar with me. I probably did my own imitation of hot-poker-up-the-ass writhing, at that point, and I doubt very much that I was breathing.

Then it cut off as suddenly as it had come, as if Dahok had been forced to direct his attentions to something more important than my death. 

I just lay there in the narrow space between the altar and the wall, curled into a ball and gasping for breath. Every muscle in my body hurt, and a couple of them were cramped up something fierce. I don't think I could have moved if my life depended on it. Blood trickled into my one good eye from the reopened cut on my forehead. Black fog blurred the edges of what little vision I had left.

Seared on the black nothingness that closed in around me, I saw more pictures. Hercules and Iolaus, fighting something I didn't even want to get a clear look at, finally tossing it into a pit of flame. Bright light, and the guy with the staff, whose name I now knew to be Zarathustra. Hercules and Iolaus, hugging each other as if they'd never let go. 

And Iolaus, standing in that searing brightness, one hand lifted in a gesture of farewell, as Zarathustra's voice said, "You were right, Hercules. The Impulse to Create does have a name."

That was it. Mercifully, I passed out again.

When the curtain of blackness drew away, I was still in the same place, but I didn't hurt quite so much. Definite improvement, that.

I pulled myself up to my knees. I heard muffled sounds, as if there were quite a few people nearby. Fortunately, no one had noticed me, since I'd been pretty much out of sight on the floor behind the small altar. Cautiously, I peeked over the top. Yep, lots of people out in the main part of the temple. Not good. How was I going to get out of here without being seen, as I much preferred to do at this point?

First thing was to get cleaned up a bit. One of the brass vases that had been on the altar lay on its side next to me, flowers mostly strewn about the floor in a puddle of water. But there was still quite a bit of water inside the vase. Using that and the scarf I had around my neck, I managed to wipe most of the dried blood out of my eyes and off my face. The white altar cloth hung skewed and sideways, so I pulled it off, careful to slide the one remaining candlestick off the cloth and leave it in its proper place. Arranging the cloth over my head and around my shoulders like a makeshift cowl to hide my bruised face, I crawled to one side of the altar and rose slowly to my feet. It took a moment for the world to stop spinning, but I leaned against the wall and used that moment to check out the situation.

The main body of the temple was full of people, as I had previously noticed. They were sitting on the stone benches, squatting in the aisles, and standing against the walls, all facing towards the main altar. I recognized some of them as followers of Iolaus. 

No, I corrected myself firmly, not Iolaus. Dahok. Don't ever forget that.

No one took any notice of me as I took a few shaky steps toward the archway, hoping to mingle with the crowd and sneak away. This was good. The last thing I needed was to be recognized as one of the more active people in the cult, since I now knew what it had really been all about. I felt like a first-prize piece of shit, or worse. All I wanted was to skulk away and hide in a deep, dark hole somewhere.

But first I had to get out of there. I moved around the side of the arch, joining the others standing by the wall. The crowd was fairly quiet, but most people were crying. Some of the women were wailing in grief. I wasn't real sure I wanted to look in the direction of the main altar, but I knew I had to. I propped my back against the cold stone behind me and raised my eyes.

Iolaus' body was there, but he wasn't tied and spread-eagled, nor was he wearing the white robe. He was covered almost to his chin by a heavy gold cloth. Someone had evidently cleaned up the corpse and arranged it in a much more peaceful position. 

As I looked at what was left of Iolaus, somewhere in my heart a small piece of me turned to blue crystal ice, ice that burned like fire. I'll get you for this, Dahok, I vowed, recalling that half-glimpsed monstrosity I had seen falling into the firepit. You are my sworn enemy. Now and forever!

I could see Hercules kneeling beside the altar, his forehead pressed against the cold stone. Nebula knelt next to him, her shoulders shaking with her sobs. I saw the big man put his arm around Nebula and draw her close against his side, as much for his comfort as for hers, I think.

Although I wasn't really sure how I felt about the demi-God, I knew my heart bled for him that day. Yes, I had cared deeply for Iolaus. But my feelings were as nothing compared to how Hercules must have felt. This was his long-time friend and companion, and his lover. And now he had to mourn Iolaus' passing for the second time, and remember always what he had had to do to lay his beloved to rest.

I had thought I had no more tears to shed, but, watching Hercules and Nebula kneeling there together, I found out that wasn't true. Sinking down to the floor, I let myself feel the grief that had gathered inside me. I wanted to run screaming to the altar and throw myself onto the body lying there, but that would do no good. I had no right to such a melodramatic display.

The only thing I could do to keep myself even marginally sane was to recall that last vision I'd seen of Iolaus, waving good-bye. Yes, the man I had known and loved was dead, but I knew he was safe in the Light forever. What more can you wish for someone, if you truly love them?

Except, of course, to have them with you always.


	3. THE NEXT MONSTER

THE NEXT MONSTER

After the dust had settled from the debacle in which I had been so shamefully involved as a worshipper of Dahok, I found myself poorer by a goodly number of dinars, among other things. I set out to remedy that situation with a vengeance. (The "other things" would be a lot more difficult to remedy. I've got a feeling they'll haunt me for the rest of my life. But more about that later. First things first.)

No sooner had I regained my health, and most of my sanity, than I set out on a purchasing expedition, hoping to make some good buys on the jewelry and other precious antiquities in which I deal, in order that I might replenish my severely-depleted finances. By that time, Ysabel, my housekeeper, was glad to have me off and out from underfoot. She had gotten pretty tired of taking care of me, not to mention listening to my various rantings and ravings over what had happened. I might mention that she was aware of the state of my finances also, having known just how much I had donated to the cause of the so-called God of Light.

So it was that I found myself following a seldom-frequented road along a river, hoping to cut short the distance to Epidaurus so I'd arrive in time for the Mid-Summer festival being held there. Wherever people gather to buy and sell things, I can often pick up something at a good price. You can pretty much count on there being some folks who simply don't know the true value of what they have to sell. That's where I come in.

At any rate, the road, being unused and poorly maintained, had turned out to be harder travelling for my horse than I had reckoned on. As dusk approached, we were both tired and thirsty, not to mention pretty damn dusty. I could see the glint of water between the trees, so I dismounted and led my mare through the thick underbrush, planning to let her drink while I washed up a little. 

As I cleared the last of the trees and bushes, I stepped out rather unexpectedly onto a muddy strip of open ground sloping down to the river. Losing my footing, I slid ungracefully down the bank and stumbled right smack into someone standing there with a fishing pole in his hands. Much to my dismay, we both lost our balance, slipped, and ended up face down in the shallow muck.

Muttering a few well-chosen obscenities, I struggled to my feet, grabbing the man I had bumped into and trying to help him up also. As we both wiped off the worst of the mud, I got a good look at his face.

"Great fucking Zeus!" I exclaimed in horror, as I jumped back several feet, slipped, and ended up sitting in the mud again. "What are you doing here?!"

He regarded my performance curiously.

"Uh –- fishing?" he suggested, hastily retrieving his pole and taking a few steps away from the obviously crazy person confronting him. At least he managed his retreat with a little more grace and style than I had.

I scuttled backwards even further and found myself actually in the water. I didn't care about that. The last time I had seen this man, I had ended up in some really deep shit, so I wasn't inclined to get anywhere near him.

"What's the matter?" he asked hesitantly. "Can I help you get up?"

"No! Keep away from me! You can't fool me again, Dahok! I want nothing more to do with you!"

"Dahok? I think you've got me mixed up with someone else, friend."

That's when I noticed that he seemed about as leery of me as I was of him. That just didn't make sense, considering who and what I thought he was. I examined him a little closer. Despite the mud-splatters, his clothing was pretty fancy for someone out in the woods. The fitted top looked more like something you'd wear at court, not to mention the shiny orange-gold tights. Combined with the fact that he had no shoes on, probably due to the layer of mud he'd been standing in, and the added fact that he badly needed a shave, he presented a most incongruous appearance, to say the least.

By this time, I had managed to flounder my way into the deeper water and had gotten to my feet. My clothes were totally soaked and my boots were getting heavier every time I tried to take a step. I'm not a particularly strong swimmer and I could feel the current tugging at my thighs.

"Are you sure you don't need some help?" the strangely-clad creature suggested deceitfully, extending the tip of his fishing pole in my direction, as if he thought I might grab onto it for support.

He looked innocent enough, but I couldn't bring myself to trust him. Not by a long shot.

"Not from you. Go away! Leave me alone!"

I was still backing up as fast as I could, never mind the river behind me. My foot caught on a rock and I went under.

Next thing I knew, he was next to me, pulling me up. Although he wasn't any taller than I am, he must have been a little better at keeping his footing. Or perhaps it was just that, being barefoot, he wasn't hampered by soggy riding boots. Either way, we were now in no immediate danger of being swept away.

Maybe I'd figured him wrong? Would Dahok really be floundering around in the mud with a fishing pole, or pulling me out of the water?

"Look," he said reasonably, guiding me towards the riverbank, "I think I know what the problem is. I've run into it a couple of times before, but mostly I get confused with Hercule's friend, the other Iolaus, not with Dahok."

"Uh-uh. You can't fool me that easily. The last I saw of Iolaus, he was –-" I hesitated, not sure exactly how to describe what I had seen, or how to convince anyone else it had been real and not some kind of hallucination. He'd been standing in a really bright light, holding up one hand in a gesture of farewell just before he dissolved into sparkles. "He was –- well –- he was dead," I concluded lamely.

The other man just nodded. "Yeah. He is dead. I'm --" This time he was the one at a loss for words. He shook his head slowly. "Well, my name's Iolaus, but I'm not the Iolaus you knew. Or Dahok either, for that matter." He shrugged. "It's a long story."

"I think I'd like to hear it," I replied, my fear dissolving rapidly into curiosity. "But not now. We need to get the rest of this mud cleaned off of us before it dries, then get out of the water. Uh -- by the way, I'm sorry about all this mess."

"No problem. I've been in far worse places," he assured me, as we rinsed off and then picked our way up onto the less soggy ground.

I caught the reins of my mare on the way. She had simply stood in the water, drinking her fill and watching all our antics with an admirable calm.

"I'm camped not far away," the man who had called himself Iolaus said. "Care to join me? I caught a few fish earlier on and the wood's ready for a fire. It's going to get a bit chilly pretty soon, when the sun goes down."

"I've got some food in my saddlebags," I offered. "And I still want to hear that long story you mentioned."

"Sure," he said, picking up a couple of good-sized river trout that had been lying lined up neatly under a bush. He held them up, smiling. "Not bad, huh? I knew that bug thing I tied to my hook would work." He showed me the arrangement of feathers and string at the end of his fishing line as we made our way to his campsite. It did look kind of like a bug.

"You caught all those fish with that? No bait?"

"Uh-huh. Think it might catch on?"

"Well, perhaps. But you'll have to come up with something better to call it. 'Bug thing' doesn't sound too classy. It'll never fly."

"You think so?" he asked.

"I know so. I'm a salesman of sorts, and I know all about marketing strategies."

"Okay. I'll see if I can come up with a better name for it."

"By the way, speaking of names, mine's Euphonius," I added as we got to his campsite, realizing I'd never properly introduced myself.

I was in for another surprise when he squatted next to his pile of wood and started digging through his backpack. He came up with some kind of a small metal jug with a wheel on it and proceeded to start the fire with it. The darn thing worked. I just shook my head in amazement as I took the saddle off my horse and tied her to a nearby tree.

Once the fire was going good, we got out of our wet clothes and wrapped up in our blankets. I unpacked some onions and carrots and black bread from my saddlebags as my contribution to supper, but he insisted on cooking the fish himself. Fish isn't my favorite food and I wasn't all that hungry, but I had already determined to be polite and eat at least a little of it. 

While he fiddled with the food, I wrung out our clothes and hung them up on some bushes. (By the way, I was right about that outfit he'd been wearing. The fabric was expensive stuff, not like what you'd find in the local marketplaces.) Dumping the water out of my boots, I dried them as well as I could with the end of my blanket, not forgetting to also clean off the small knife I always keep in a sheath inside the right boot. I'm no great fighter, but it's come in handy a couple of times. Besides, I liked the feel of the blade in my hand, and the look of the graceful dragon carved into the jade handle. I stowed it inside one of my saddlebags, to keep it safe and dry.

As we were doing all this busywork, he started telling me about that other world he'd come from, where people were mostly very different from what they are here. I found myself wondering what I might be like in that world. Interesting thought, that.

So entranced was I by his tale that I didn't notice until the fish was almost ready to eat and he had come to the end of the story that I was sitting here pretty damn near to being stark naked, with someone who was the spitting image of the Iolaus I had once lusted after to the point of near catastrophe. Not that this would do me any good, of course. The gorgeous little fellow chattering on so unconcernedly might inhabit a very familiar body, but he was nevertheless a total stranger to me.

"Something wrong?" he asked, apparently sensing the sudden change that came over me at that thought.

"Uh –- no. Nothing at all. Just thinking."

He slid a portion of fish out of the pan and onto a plate, then handed it to me. The vegetables I'd given him were sliced up and mixed with small chunks of trout, all covered with some kind of sauce. 

As he scooped some onto his own plate and began eating, I asked with as casual an air as possible, "So, if you came to this world with Hercules, how come you two aren't together?"

"We - uh –- we figured it would be better to go our separate ways for a while. It was kind of disturbing, for both of us. You know, with each of us looking so much like someone the other had known, and yet being so different?"

"Yeah, I guess that would be hard to handle." To say the least! I added to myself. It's hard enough for me, right now.

I took an experimental nibble at the food he had served me. It was actually pretty good, considering. I didn't find so much as a single bone in the pieces of fish, and those nasty little bones are one of the chief reasons I dislike the stuff in the first place. Before I quite realized it, I had eaten the whole portion.

"Want some more?" he inquired.

I nodded. When I'd finished, I reached into my saddlebag and pulled out a couple of apples, offering one to him. 

"Thanks," he said, taking the fruit from my hand. As he sliced it carefully into neat sections, his expression changed a little, and I knew something had occurred to him. Something that bothered him.

"What?" I asked.

He looked away, then said hesitantly, "Did you know that other Iolaus very well?"

So how do I answer that?

"Too well -- and not well enough," was all I could think of. He kept looking at me, waiting for more. "Okay. Probably better than I should have, especially after he got involved with Dahok. But then, that wasn't really him, just his body."

The mention of Dahok brought back to my mind the oath I had sworn to take vengeance on that loathesome demon back then, when I'd stood looking at what was left of Iolaus' mutilated body lying on the altar. Oh, it had sounded good at the time, but as yet I hadn't figured out any way to get revenge on an entity such as Dahok. 

This line of conversation was making me distinctly uncomfortable for other reasons also. I couldn't pretend to myself any longer: I felt a definite attraction to this pretty little man sitting next to me by the fire. He was one strange dude, but I found myself wanting him even more the better I got to know him. Question was, did he want me? Was he even interested in men, for that matter? Just because he seemed somewhat on the neat and prissy side, not to mention the fact that he was clearly an expert in the culinary arts, that didn't make him any more likely to share my desire for the same sex than anyone else. In fact, I've known a good number of men who would make this cute little fellow look positively macho in comparison, yet they were strictly interested in women. Come to think of it, I've known some men who do share my preferences who would make Hercules look like a wimp. Appearances can be deceiving.

Meanwhile, the subject of my speculations sat looking down at the flames, but I could see that he was watching me out of the corner of his eye, his forehead creased into a slight frown. "You and the other Iolaus were lovers, weren't you?" he said at last.

He was pretty quick on the uptake, if he'd guessed that from the little I'd said.

"That kind of depends on what, or maybe who, you mean. With Dahok, yes. I suppose you might call it that, although love had very little to do with it, I'm afraid. With Iolaus himself –- well, he was more of a one-night stand. Not that I wouldn't have wanted it to become more, but he was already involved with –- someone else." Don't ask me why I didn't tell him the someone else was Hercules. I just didn't. Let Hercules tell him that, if he wanted to and hadn't already.

Iolaus looked almost as uncomfortable as I did. Something about this was disturbing him, and I didn't think it was exactly lust for my body. I mean, I'm not real hard to look at, and I'm in reasonably good shape for a man who'll be approaching fifty not too many years from now, but a gorgeous hunk I wasn't, and I had never fooled myself in that regard.

"I know what happened with Dahok," Iolaus said. "Hercules told me about it. It must have been pretty awful."

"That's putting it mildly." I realized I was still holding an untouched apple in my hand, so I took a bite and swallowed it before going on. "You know how life is: sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes you screw up completely." I shrugged. "Well, that whole business with Dahok belongs in that last category, as far as I'm concerned."

"Yeah," he agreed, nodding. "I'll lay odds that you're not the only one who feels that way either."

But Dahok wasn't what was bothering him, not really. All of a sudden I knew where I had seen that particular look on someone's face before, and I wasn't happy with the connections it made in my brain. You see, sometimes love can be very unloving. There are people who enjoy hurting other people, and I don't mean hurting someone who wants to be hurt, since I know full well there are some folks who do enjoy that. I'm talking about true sadists, not the ones who play consensual games with willing partners. I'd once known a girl who had gotten involved with someone like that. She was my favorite cousin. Much of the time, this sort of thing happens between husbands and wives, but it can happen with men too, especially if there's a serious power differential between them.

Remembering the scars I had seen on his back when he'd taken his clothes off, I took an educated guess about Iolaus' past. "You and the Sovereign –- you were lovers, weren't you?"

His short and very bitter laugh didn't surprise me as much as it should have. "I don't know if you could call it that. As you said, love had very little to do with it."

"Yeah. But I was referring to lust as the other factor. I don't think that's what you mean."

"It's not." The creases in his forehead deepened and his lips compressed tightly into a straight line.

"You don't like men?" I asked, deliberately misunderstanding him in an effort to draw him out.

"No, it's not that. It's what he did, and the way he did it that I didn't like."

"I take it you didn't exactly want to be his bed partner?"

"As you said, that's putting it mildly. I hated it. Even when he –- made me enjoy it, I still hated it." He turned away. Clenching his fist, he smashed it down against his thigh hard enough to hurt. "And I didn't have the guts to try to get away from him."

"It wasn't your fault."

"If I'd been a real man, instead of a wimp –-"

I put one hand tentatively on his shoulder, interrupting him before he could finish. "Don't even go there. It's a dead end and a trap. The only shame lies with the one who forces someone else against their will, not with the one who has no choice."

"There's always a choice," he said grimly.

"Yeah. Refuse and die. That's not what I meant by choice."

"I was a coward," he insisted, his voice shaking around the word. "I'm still a coward. I wish I had the courage to be a hero, like that other Iolaus you knew."

My hand was still on his shoulder. I could feel the tension in the bunched muscles. "I've heard it said that heroes are only made when all retreat is cut off," I said, in an effort to lighten things up a little. I started massaging his neck. (Okay, I had my own agenda here. But the guy gave a whole new meaning to being tense.) 

"Hercules says courage doesn't mean not being afraid," he replied, pretty much ignoring my efforts to loosen him up. "It means doing what you have to do, despite your fear. Trouble is, I don't think I could even do that."

"What would Hercules know about it? With Zeus as a father and all the strength and power any man could want, how could he have any idea what it's like to be afraid?"

Iolaus sighed and relaxed back against me a fraction. Good, I was getting somewhere. "You're wrong about that," he objected. "Herc's afraid of things."

"How do you know?"

"I asked him. He said something to the effect that when the sun's out, he feels as if he'll live forever, but at night, when he can't sleep and the worries start creeping in -- Well, the next monster is going to get him for sure."

Hmm. I'd never really liked the demi-God much, perhaps mostly because he had Iolaus and I didn't, but this shed a new light on the man. Possibly I'd misjudged him. Maybe he was a little more human than I thought.

"But mostly," Iolaus went on, letting his head loll forward on his chest, "I think he's afraid the people he cares for will be hurt or killed. He's lost most of the ones he loved, you know."

"Yeah. I know. I listen to the stories the bards tell." Of course, I listen mostly to hear about Iolaus' part in the tales. But I didn't think it would help any to tell that to my new friend, especially since he seemed to be getting very comfortable with what I was doing.

"Herc even lost me," he went on. "Well, not me, the --"

"I know who you mean," I said softly, cutting off his explanation.

He sighed, then flexed his neck around experimentally. "That feels good," he said, sounding almost surprised.

I moved my hands to his shoulders and arms, pushing the blanket down as I did so and kneading the tight muscles. (And the man had muscles, make no mistake about that. I couldn't help wondering if it had been his own idea to keep himself in good physical condition, or the Sovereign's.)

"That feels good too," he said after a while.

Pulling him closer, I slid my hands around to the front of his chest and said into his ear, "I can make it feel even better, if you want me to."

I could tell he knew what I was suggesting, since he tensed up again, but he didn't move away. I could see him press his lips together, almost as if he were steeling himself against something he knew would be unpleasant. 

"Hey, relax," I said softly, brushing the side of his face with my lips. "It won't hurt. But if you want me to back off, just say so. It's your choice."

"My choice?"

Tears came to my eyes as I was overcome by a vivid memory of that other Iolaus saying the same words to me once, under somewhat similar circumstances but with a slightly different meaning.

"Your choice," I affirmed, fighting to keep my voice steady. "I will never do anything to hurt you."

He was looking straight ahead, as if he saw something off in the distance, something he didn't like. "You really mean that?"

Gods, this dude needed a lot of reassurance, didn't he?

"I mean it. In fact, I swear it, on my father's grave."

He turned his head to look at me, not quite smiling. Letting out a deep breath, he replied, "I want it."

"Good. So do I."

As I leaned in to kiss him, his smile became a little more definite.

I'm not one for explicit descriptions of what I do in bed (or, in this case, perhaps I should say beside the campfire), but I will tell you there was absolutely nothing I needed to teach him in the way of technique. He seemed a bit at a loss as to how to proceed when there was no one telling him what to do, but he got over that fairly quickly.

I was pretty sure there were moments when what we did called up some unpleasant memories from his experiences with the Sovereign, but I had a few bad moments of my own to deal with also. After all, he not only looked, and quite often responded, just as the original Iolaus had, but, except for the blue of his eyes, he also looked exactly like the demon-possessed version of Iolaus, and there was nothing that two men could do to each other that I hadn't already done with that particular incarnation of Dahok.

Do I really need to tell you it was incredibly wonderful, despite the numerous ghosts that shared our bedroll with us? By the time we finally fell asleep, the night was well advanced and dawn was only a few hours away.

However, we never made it through to dawn. I was dragged unwillingly out of a sound sleep, not to mention out of Iolaus' arms, by the sound of a horse's shrill neighing. The fire had burned low, but still had some life in it, so I knew not too much time had passed. 

I sat up, searching the surrounding darkness for any possible danger. I had tied my mare to a tree at the edge of the small clearing, on the side closest to the river. She was screaming with fear, plunging up and down as if she were alternatively trying to pull loose from something or stomping on it.

Iolaus sat up next to me, rubbing his eyes and looking around. "What is it? What's wrong?" he whispered.

"Dunno," I replied, still trying to make out what was going on. 

All of a sudden, his eyes went wide and his face froze into an expression of absolute terror, mouth gaping open. He tried to say something, but no words came out. He just pointed at the shifting shadows near my struggling horse.

His night vision must be better than mine. It took me several more seconds before I could see anything, and then I almost wished I hadn't.

A net of ghastly white things I could only describe as very thin tentacles undulated on the ground near my horse, several having already attached themselves to the terrified animal despite her efforts to free herself. Even as I watched, another one slid around her rear foot, the tip anchoring itself in her flesh.

It took a moment before either of us reacted, and in that moment, I felt something touch my bare ankle, feeling rather like the bite of one of those stinging ants that attack so furiously when you step on one of their hills. I swatted at it automatically, and found my hand gripping something that reminded me of strong fishing line more than anything else.

Throwing off the blanket, I saw one of those awful tentacles wrapping itself around my ankle. The stinging sensation had already faded, leaving a numb spot where the tip had embedded itself. Panic flashed through my mind. I tugged frantically on the tentacle, trying to tear it loose. It ripped out fairly easily, but by then there were three more around my other leg.

Iolaus hadn't moved from where he sat next to me, staring transfixed at my legs as I tried to yank myself free. So far, none of the tentacles had reached him yet.

"Run!" I shouted, shoving him away from me. 

As another tentacle grabbed one of my wrists, he finally reacted, gathering his legs underneath him and getting to his knees. But instead of running, he reached into his backpack and took out that thing he'd used to start our campfire. Flicking it into life, he held the flame under the things that had attacked me. They blackened and withered, finally burning through. I jerked my leg loose, but felt more stings on the other leg. 

There were more of the tentacles slithering towards us now. Despite Iolaus' efforts, it was clear we'd soon be overwhelmed. I saw one of them catch his arm, even as I became aware of a light but definite pull on the leg that was most firmly entwined. Whatever this was, it wanted to drag me towards the river. Not good.

"Iolaus, run, please," I said more calmly now. "Get out of here while you still can."

He shook his head, still burning away tentacles as quickly as he could. One of the things raised up behind him, then twined into his long hair. This was a battle we wouldn't win, despite his efforts. As the pressure on my leg increased, I thought with grim irony that the barbed ends of the tentacles were rather like fishhooks. Only trouble was, I was the fish, not the fisherman. I pulled back against the pressure and was able to hold my ground. But for how long?

Iolaus was having trouble wielding his flame by now, since he was steadily being drawn into the net himself. As I scrabbled for a firm grip on something, my hand caught my saddlebag, which we had been using as a pillow. I reached inside and pulled out my knife, sawing desperately at the tentacles that held me. They were tough, but I managed to cut through most of them, albeit far too slowly. 

Iolaus was now able to concentrate his efforts on freeing himself. Between the two of us, we were barely holding the weaving nest of tentacles at bay. There was no central thing to fight, just these deadly filaments, no single one of which could hold us by itself. It was the sheer multitude of them that was the threat, plus the deadening poison I could feel spreading from each little sting. I didn't even want to think about why this creature, whatever it was, wanted us in the river.

Something had to be controlling the tentacles. They placed themselves too accurately to be operating blindly. But what was it? And where was it?

I had almost fought myself free. With a little more effort, I might actually get clear of this mess. With renewed hope, I slashed harder at the filaments still binding me.

That's when I realized that Iolaus wasn't having as much luck as I was. The things were getting better at evading his makeshift torch. I might get away, but he was now tangled much more tightly and being pulled inexorably towards the bushes, despite his best struggles. And there were even more tentacles slithering into view, as the monster sensed victory over at least one of its victims.

I could have run. I was no hero, and I wasn't about to be made into one by virtue of my retreat being cut off, as I had so cynically said earlier. But could I run away and leave Iolaus to his fate, after he'd given up his own chance to escape by trying to help me? 

Still slashing at the tentacles that threatened me, I pulled back a little, frantically searching for something definite to fight. These things were just too intelligent. There had to be something controlling them. It had to be there somewhere. Didn't it?

It was, hovering on a thick stalk just poking itself through the surrounding bushes. The stalk bulged at the top, and something that looked very like an eye with a horizontal pupil regarded the scene with a cold stare.

Iolaus saw it at about the same time, but by then it was virtually looming over him as he was being dragged along the ground. He had dropped his firemaker, probably due to the effects of the poison. I was having trouble feeling my feet as it was, and the thing had evidently concentrated its attack on his hands.

I looked at the all-too-small knife I held. No way could I reach the eyestalk by slashing through all those tentacles. If I had any sense, I'd run while I still could, as a bunch of them seemed to be massing for another try at me.

I had an idea, but if I followed through on it, it could just as easily fail and land me in deep shit also.

Iolaus' eyes met mine and I knew he had assessed his situation pretty much as I had. "Euphonius, run," he gasped, still struggling but not so strongly as before.

Aw, shit! I thought. If I don't try, I won't be able to live with myself. 

I got to my knees, gauging the distance between myself and that malevolent eye. Couldn't be much more than twenty feet. Chancy, but doable.

I tossed my knife at the eyestalk, watching it flip end for end several times as it flew through the air. Everything seemed to slow down, as it has a way of doing in moments of great peril. If I missed, or miscalculated as to which end of the knife would be aimed toward my target when it hit, I'd be at the mercy of the net of tentacles that were rapidly weaving their way in my direction.

I hadn't miscalculated. My blade buried itself to the hilt in the center of that awful pupil. 

The eyestalk whipped around wildly. The knife came loose and damn near skewered me before it hit the ground. I scooped it up, taking advantage of that small piece of luck. Green gunk spewed from the eye as it continued its futile contortions. The tentacles went into spasms, thrashing as crazily as the eyestalk was now doing. I heard Iolaus scream as the ones that had been holding him whipped around, either tearing completely out of him or ripping themselves apart if they couldn't. The ones that had latched onto my legs did the same thing, with enough violence to toss me flat on my back, knocking the air out of my lungs as I hit.

When I could breathe again, I crawled weakly over to Iolaus. There was no sign of the monster that had attacked us. I figured it was too much to hope for that it was dead, but at least it had gone away. For now.

He was conscious, but rather bruised from having been flipped against a tree when the tentacles went crazy. I propped him up against the tree trunk, checking for worse injuries.

"I'm okay, I think," he managed to say, smiling a little. "You throw knives?"

I made a face, still feeling for broken bones. "Only as a last resort. Miss your target, and you're without a weapon and worse off than before."

"I mean, you know how to throw knives?"

"Yeah. All it takes is practice. It's kind of a hobby of mine, and it's come in handy a few times."

He glanced in the direction of the river. "Yeah. I guess so."

Much to my relief, I hadn't found any real damage. We both had a lot of sore spots where the "fishhooks" had torn loose, and a few of the nasty little barbs were still embedded in various parts of our bodies. We'd have to get them out pretty quickly, just in case they continued to ooze poison. Considering the deadening effect of the poison, that wouldn't hurt too much. Not until later on, anyway.

I smiled. "Hey, you didn't do too bad with that spark jug thingie of yours either."

He laughed at that, a strange, upscale giggle. "Guess we're a couple of dangerous dudes, huh?"

That notion seemed so ridiculous to both of us that we started laughing for real. And then we found we couldn't stop, finally sliding to the ground and guffawing helplessly. If anyone had happened by just then, they'd have taken us for a couple of idiots, lying there naked, streaked with dirt and covered with sores, and doing nothing but laughing about it.

Eventually, we sobered up, wiping the tears from our eyes and struggling to our feet.

"We better get out of here," Iolaus suggested, grimacing as he jerked a particularly deeply-embedded barb out of his shoulder.

"Yeah," I agreed readily. "And the sooner the better. That thing might come back."

"What was it?"

"How should I know?"

"Well, this is your world, not mine. Are monsters like that pretty common around here?"

"I wouldn't call them common, but they're around."

"Yeah. Same in my world. I was hoping it would be different here."

We had been getting gingerly into our still-damp clothes as we talked.

"By the way," he said, "thanks for saving me."

"Are you kidding? You saved me first."

He thought about that for a minute, pulling on some really funny-looking shoes with absurdly pointed toes. "You mean I actually did something brave?"

"Yeah," I concluded with a smile. "You sure did."

And so did I, I thought in surprise.

"Wow," he said slowly, a pleased look gradually coming over his face. "I can't wait to tell Hercules about this."

Can't say I was exactly enthusiastic about that response, but I certainly couldn't blame him for it.

I went over to check on my mare. She was in about the same shape as we were, but fortunately no worse. Carefully, I put the blanket and saddle on her back, not sure she would be willing to tolerate it. The poison must have deadened her sores as effectively as it had ours. She stood there patiently as I hoisted my saddlebags into place also.

I mounted as gently as I could. Reaching down a hand to Iolaus, who had gathered his things into his backpack and now stood next to me, I said, "Come on. Let's go."

"I don't know how to ride."

"You don't have to. Just hop up behind me and hold on."

He looked rather doubtfully at the distance between his rear and the back of my horse. I freed my boot from the stirrup. "Put one foot in here and then push yourself up with the other one."

He lifted one leg dubiously. "I don't think my shoe will fit in there."

"Take the damn things off! They look silly anyway."

He looked down at his feet, then smiled. "Yeah, they do, don't they?"

"Yes. Now get them off and get up here." 

Without further comment, he did as he was told.

 

Once we had put some distance between ourselves and the monster, we both relaxed a little. Unfortunately, the effects of the poison were beginning to wear off. I can't speak for my travelling companion, but I wasn't feeling too great by the time my ill-chosen shortcut rejoined the main road. 

"Okay, where to now?" I asked Iolaus.

"Well, I was headed for Argos."

"Oh, that's not too far from here. In fact, it's on my way to Epidaurus. I'll drop you there." 

Actually, it was a little out of my way, but I didn't want to leave him yet, especially out in the middle of nowhere. He'd been stung worse than I had, so he had to be hurting worse than I was and I'd far rather see him in some sort of a safe place before we split up.

"Thanks. I'd appreciate that." I thought I heard relief in his voice. Guess the thought of hiking down the road didn't exactly appeal to him either.

We rode in silence for a while, his arms still loosely around my waist and his head occasionally dropping forward to rest against my shoulder. Truth to tell, I was having a bit of trouble staying awake myself and probably drifted off now and then also. Fortunately, my long-suffering mare kept plodding along, even without my guidance and encouragement.

 

"Euphonius?" Iolaus said later on, when we stopped to rest and eat a bit of food.

"Yeah?"

"You said you lived in that same town as my –- I mean, Iolaus' mother?"

"Uh-huh."

"Do you think she'd mind if I stopped by to visit her someday? Or would that be a bad idea?"

I thought it over for a while. Erytheia and I were friends. Over the last few months, I had gotten to know her pretty well. She and my housekeeper, Ysabel, had hit it off also. Erytheia had helped Ysabel put me back together again after I'd returned from Corinth and my misadventures with Dahok. She had asked me to tell her about what happened to her son. I did, but it was a severely-edited version I gave her, in an effort to spare her feelings as much as possible. (Okay, and to spare myself as much shame as possible also. But everything I told her was the truth, even if it had been tailored a bit.) 

However, I still owed Iolaus an answer to his question, and he was sitting there looking at me with the fear of rejection written all over his expressive face.

"Yes, I think she'd like to see you," I assured him. "I think she could handle it."

I discovered he could smile just as blindingly as the other Iolaus, if he had reason to do so.

"Maybe I'll come to Lydicea someday."

"Fine with me," I said. "I'd be more than happy to see you again."

He glanced away, taking a couple of bites of the piece of bread in his hand and not saying anything.

"What's the matter?" I finally asked, fearing the worst. Maybe he never wanted to see me again. I had thought he'd enjoyed last evening's activities, but I could be wrong. It may have just brought back too many memories.

"Would Hercules –- I mean, do you think he'd -– well, enjoy the kind of thing we did last night?"

Oh, shit! This wasn't what I had been hoping to hear either.

"I'm afraid that's something you'll have to ask him yourself," I replied, in as neutral a tone as I could manage.

"I know that." He still wasn't looking at me. "I only meant is he interested in men, not is he interested in me. I mean, I know he was married and all, but so was the Sovereign, at one time in his life."

"Oh. Um -- yeah, I think it would be safe to assume Hercules swings that way too. In fact, I'm pretty sure of it."

Iolaus looked at me then, and I could tell what he was thinking. I smiled at the idea. Me and the big guy? I don't think so. 

"No," I hastened to assure him. "I don't mean I know it from personal experience. I just have it on –- shall we say? –- good authority. That's all."

Yeah, like the other Iolaus told me. That's all.

I was still determined not to tell him about the relationship between the demi-God and that other version of himself. After all, you could hardly expect me to be an enthusiastic matchmaker here, could you?

My answer seemed to satisfy him, since he nodded his head. Wiping the breadcrumbs off his lap, he stood up, almost able not to wince at the aches and pains that had to be tormenting him. "Let's get going, huh? I'm dying for a hot bath."

"Yeah, me too. Argos isn't much further now."

 

It was late afternoon when we got to the city. Iolaus didn't have much in the way of money, so I paid for the room and the hot bath, not to mention some decent salve from the local healer for our various sores and bruises.

After all that had happened, I'm afraid we were both far too worn out to do anything more strenuous that night than sleep.

Morning came, and Iolaus was already awake and eating something when I finally opened my eyes. He held up the plate and announced cheerfully, "I went and got us some fruit. You want some?"

Oh, great, I thought to myself. Just what I need: a morning person.

"Later," I said, covering my head with the pillow. "When I wake up."

"But you are awake," he persisted, oblivious to the full extent of my pathetic and bleary-eyed condition. "And the sun's been up for ages. See?"

Next thing I knew, he had lifted the pillow off my face. He stood there grinning at me, his smile so bright that it dazzled my eyes almost as painfully as did the bright light streaming through the window.

"Iolaus," I growled, only half in jest, "either take off your clothes and get in bed with me, or put that pillow back and leave me alone. Those are your only two options, if you want to keep living."

He was still thinking over my threat when it finally got through to my brain that he was right: the morning was obviously pretty far along. I groaned dramatically. "Cancel what I just said. If I don't get up and get out of here very soon, I'll miss the Festival in Epidaurus. And I can't afford to do that."

Did I imagine the slightly crestfallen look on his face? I hope not, since he could hardly have been disappointed if the option he had chosen would have been to put the pillow back down over my face.

With as much grace as I could muster, I dragged myself out of bed and got dressed, eating a little of his fruit as I was doing so.

I watched him out of the corner of my eye as I shaved. He was just sitting there, staring at me strangely.

"You're awfully quiet," he remarked, as I finished what I was doing and rinsed off my face. "Is something wrong?"

"Whatever gave you that idea? I'm always like this in the morning."

But that wasn't the whole truth, and I think he knew it. I was contemplating the imminent necessity of saying good-bye to him. And I didn't want to do it.

"There's something you're not telling me, isn't there?" he went on.

Oh yeah, I thought to myself, looking in the mirror to comb my hair and seeing his reflection in the background at the same time. Lots of things. Like how much I love you. Like how much I want you. Like how much I've missed you. I know full well that you aren't the same as that other Iolaus I knew, but part of his spirit lives on inside you, even if you don't realize that yet. And I'm not going to tell you any of this. Not here, not now. You have to find yourself first. Not only that, but you also have to find out what, if anything, you and Hercules mean to each other first.

I shook my head at his question. In the mirror, I saw his face take on a very troubled look. Uh-oh.

"You don't like me," he said, sounding totally defeated as he stood and picked up his backpack. "That's okay. I'll leave now. Thanks for everything, huh?"

I reached the door before he did, blocking his way. "That's not true, so don't ever think it, you hear me?"

"But --" He sounded puzzled and didn't look as if he quite believed me.

"No buts. I like you just fine. I'm very glad we met, and the other night was terrific."

His face lit up again. "Even if it was almost the last thing we ever did on earth?" he suggested archly.

"It would have been worth it, even so," I said, just a little too seriously. "Look, I've got to go. And you have a lot to learn about this world."

He nodded, lips compressed into an expression of what I hope was mild disappointment over my insistence on leaving. 

I gathered up my saddlebags, put my arm around his shoulders, and guided him out of the room and down to the stables. It didn't take the stable boy long to saddle up my mare and bring her out, once he saw the dinar I took from my belt pouch.

"I -- hope I'll see you again," Iolaus said softly as I put my foot into the stirrup and mounted up.

I reached down and held out my hand. He clasped it firmly.

"You'll see me again, if you want to," I told him, as I let go. "You know where I live, don't you?"

"Yeah," he said softly, as I turned my horse's head to the street. 

I kicked my usually placid mare into a gallop, not daring to look back, for fear I wouldn't be able to ride away if I once turned around and saw him standing there. I wanted nothing more than to go back and beg him to come along with me, but that wouldn't have been fair. Not to him, and, ultimately, not to me. He had to discover what his path would be in this world, free from the Sovereign's influence. He'd already realized that when he'd parted with Hercules.

Maybe I'd see him again, or maybe I wouldn't. In the final analysis, any future encounter between us would probably depend on what Iolaus found out about himself, not to mention whatever he found out about Hercules' feelings for him. Or -- who could tell? -- maybe he'd discover that what he truly wanted was a woman.

Of course, even if he and Hercules became an item, it still wasn't hopeless. The other Iolaus had once told me that he and his half-God lover weren't committed to a monogamous relationship, regardless of the bond between them. Maybe things would work out that way with this Iolaus? Or perhaps he'd marry a woman, but decide he still liked to fool around with men on the side, a fairly common practice in this enlightened day and age. That still left things open to certain, shall we say, possibilities? Maybe every so often, if our paths should cross --?

I smiled as I slowed my horse to a canter.


	4. AS MUCH A PART

AS MUCH A PART

 

When I heard the knock on the door, I almost jumped out of my skin. I wasn't expecting visitors, so I figured for sure it was some of Krathes' goons coming to get me.

"I'll answer it, Ysabel," I called to my housekeeper, wanting to keep her clear of any possible trouble.

I stood behind the door for just a second, my fingers on the latch, trying to calm the pounding of my heart. Cautiously, I opened the door. And breathed a sigh of relief and joy.

Iolaus stood on my doorstep, dressed much as I had seen him last, except that his hair was cut a bit shorter and his tunic seemed to have lost its sleeves, not to mention most of its tassels and pom-poms. The gold tights had been replaced with brown leather trousers, and he had ditched the stupid-looking pointy shoes. Overall, it was a big improvement, despite his being somewhat dusty and travel-worn.

"Hi, Euphonius," he said, smiling tentatively, as if unsure of his welcome.

"Hi, yourself," I managed to reply. "Come on in. Glad to see you."

"You didn't look very glad," he remarked.

"That's because I thought you were going to be someone else. You're always welcome here. You should know that." I took his duffel bag and stowed it in a handy corner. "What brings you to my neck of the woods?"

"Well, last time we met, you told me I should come by if I ever wanted to visit with my –- I mean, Erytheia. Remember?"

"Yeah, I remember."

We stood looking at each other for an awkward moment. I knew what that one night we'd spent by the river together had meant to me. What I didn't know was what, if anything, it had meant to him.

He smiled a little again. I held out my arms. With only a moment's hesitation, he stepped forward and we embraced.

"Gods, it's good to see you!" I exclaimed. Then I realized Ysabel was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, along with her young daughter. I broke off the hug and turned in their direction.

"Ysabel, this is Iolaus. Iolaus, Ysabel, my housekeeper. And that's Daria hiding behind the door. We usually call her Dari, for short."

As they exchanged the customary pleasantries, Daria came out of hiding. She was a bit shy, just getting to that awkward age where a girl isn't quite ready to start becoming a woman, but she isn't just a child anymore either. In other words, Daria would be eleven years old later this month.

She studied my guest for a long moment before asking shyly, "Are you the Iolaus?"

I winced when I saw the look on his face, but there was nothing I could say at that point to make it right.

"No, dear, I'm afraid not," he replied. "I'm not the one who was with Hercules all his life. I'm just –-"

She cut him off impatiently. "No, I don't mean that other Iolaus. I mean the one who fought the monster with Uncle Euphonius a couple of months ago."

"Uh –- yes," he stammered, his face lighting up with surprised joy, "I guess I am that Iolaus."

"Wow!" she said. "Awesome!"

"Well, I'd hardly call it awesome," he pointed out, a rueful smile on his face. "We came very close to being killed."

"Yeah, but you weren't. Will you show me that fire-starting thingie Uncle Euphonius told me about?"

Iolaus looked at me, as if to ask my permission. I shrugged. "Why not?"

He dug through his duffel bag and pulled out the small metal jug with the wheel on top. When he lit the flame, Ysabel jumped back in surprise, then went over to investigate. Mumbling something about it being a real handy gadget, she dragged him into the kitchen to see how well it would do at starting a fire in her stove. By the time I got Iolaus out of her clutches, every candle and oil lamp in the kitchen was blazing away, in addition to the stove, and Ysabel had extracted a promise from him to make one of those spark jugs for her. Daria, meanwhile, wanted to know exactly how he had used it to burn the tentacles of the monster that had attacked us.

Watching Iolaus' demonstration, I wondered what the original Iolaus would have thought of this charming little man. Lately, I had taken to "talking" to that other Iolaus in my mind. I hadn't known him for very long, but he had had a significant impact on my life nevertheless, and I missed him dreadfully. I didn't really think he could hear me, of course, even though some people claim the dead can hear our thoughts if we're thinking about them. But it felt less as if he was truly gone if I could talk to him now and then, even if only in my imagination. I could picture him watching this Iolaus, enthusiastically describing our battle with the river monster. I almost thought I could see the way he would smile over this strange version of himself. 

So what do you think? I asked the imaginary watcher. He's not you, but he's a pretty nice guy, especially considering his history with the Sovereign. He could've turned out one heck of a lot worse.

Of course, I got no answer to my question. I never really expected one. Meanwhile, this Iolaus had finished his story about our adventure. It sounded much more exciting, and far less painful, than it had seemed when it was actually happening. But I guess that's the way it is with stories.

"Uh, Dari, it wasn't all my doing, you know," Iolaus pointed out to the admiring little girl. "Your uncle did as much damage with his knife as I did with the flame. Maybe more."

"I know. But I've seen him throw his knife. I've never seen anything like this burning thing."

Ysabel interrupted her daughter's enthusiasm. "That's enough now. Come and help me get some refreshments ready for our guest."

"Oh, all right."

When the two of them had gone into the other room, I motioned Iolaus to a chair, then sat down myself.

"That's quite a cute little niece you've got there," he said.

"I'm afraid she's not really my niece, just Ysabel's daughter. She calls me uncle because she has to call me something. But she's a good child and I'm quite fond of her."

With a glance at the outside door, he changed the subject abruptly. "So who was it you didn't want to find on your doorstep?"

"You sure you want to know? It's not really your problem."

"I know. But I'd still like to hear about it."

"Well, okay. It's like this." I settled back in my chair and propped my feet on a stool. "That last buying trip I was on, -- when I ran into you, remember? -- took quite a lot longer than I had planned. Almost three months, as a matter of fact. When I got home, things had changed here in the village. The richest man in Lydicea, Nicander, had died and his son, Krathes, had taken over his estate. Krathes was always pretty obnoxious. I'm sure you know the kind: a spoiled brat that grew into a selfish young man. Ordinarily, this wouldn't matter much, but Nicander owned the vineyards outside town, not to mention most of the land around here. The old man was a fair and generous employer, and a kind landlord to the peasants farming his land. Krathes, on the other hand, is interested only in how much money he can wring out of them. That being the case, do I really need to spell it out for you? Those people who could leave, did. The rest are stuck, some working in the vineyards for low wages and others paying exorbitant amounts of rent on their farms, barely able to make ends meet."

Iolaus nodded, his lips tightening. "That was pretty much standard operating procedure, in the place I came from."

"Well, it's not all that usual here. I saw how things were going, but it didn't seem as if it involved me. After all, the vineyards aren't my business. What Krathes does with his own property is his concern. Or so I thought, until it got worse. He wasn't content with just being the richest and most influential man in the village. There were a couple of protests, people who couldn't pay their rent refusing to leave, that sort of thing. So Krathes brought in some hired thugs. Now, anyone who complains is likely to get hurt, if not thrown in prison. So far, no one's actually been killed, but I'm sure it will come to that eventually."

"You were expecting them to come after you?" When I nodded, he went on, "Why? What did you do?"

"Nothing really. I tried to talk sense to Krathes, one businessman to another. I tried to tell him he'd get more work from his employees if he treated them better. You know, use a carrot instead of a stick."

"And?"

"And he didn't want to hear it. He told me to mind my own business, or I'd find myself without any business to mind. I lost my temper and let my tongue run rough-shod over my brains, as I'm wont to do. He called in a couple of his goons, roughed me up a little, and had me thrown out in the street, warning me to keep quiet or I'd be sorry."

"I take it you haven't kept quiet?" 

"Well, I haven't exactly fomented a revolution," I replied uncomfortably. As a matter of fact, that little run-in with Krathes had shaken my confidence badly. The bruises had healed; the fear hadn't. But I didn't really want to say that to Iolaus, so I tried to put my actions in the best light possible. "All I've done is spoken to a few of the other relatively well-off folks around town, trying to get some idea where their sympathies lie." I smiled ruefully, knowing I could have –- should have –- done a lot more. "Discretion isn't my strong point, I'm afraid. I think Krathes may have gotten wind of it."

Ysabel came in with a tray of sweets, cutting short our discussion. Daria brought us each a mug of ale, smiling shyly at Iolaus as she served him.

Iolaus inspected the delicate little cakes and the pastries dripping with honey and pistachios. "These look lovely," he said. Ysabel beamed.

"They taste as good as they look," I put in, helping myself to one. 

Iolaus did the same, taking a bite and savoring the flavor. "They certainly do," he concurred heartily. "Ysabel, you must tell me how you made this. I've never tasted anything quite like it."

That elicited a detailed description from Ysabel of her recipe, which turned into a discussion of the finer points of baking. They were still at it by the time I had eaten my fill. Cooking interests me about as much as mucking out the stables. I began to squirm with boredom.

"Uh –- Iolaus," I finally said, "didn't you want to visit Erytheia?"

"Oh yeah. Right. Shall we go?"

"You're pretty dusty. Wouldn't you like a chance to clean up a little first?" I suggested. "And I could use a change of clothes, if we're going into town. How about you?"

"I don't have anything else to wear, much less anything clean," he said with an apologetic grin.

"No problem. You're about my size, and I have plenty of stuff. Come on with me."

I took him into my dressing room and waved at the rather lengthy rack of clothes. "Pick out something that suits you. Ysabel will have some water heated up soon."

Iolaus looked over my ample wardrobe with surprise. He seemed to have some knowledge of really good fabric, since he fingered some of the better materials appreciatively. "I've never seen you wearing anything like this," he said at last.

"Oh, I never dress fancy when I'm on the road," I replied as I tried to decide what to wear myself. "Too dangerous. Makes me look too rich." 

Picking out a long tunic and pants in muted shades of brown to match my hair, I wandered over to the table where I kept my jewelry boxes, carefully considering what would go best with the outfit I had chosen. "I also don't wear any jewelry when I'm travelling, except for a piece or two of fake stuff, as a decoy for thieves. They take what they can see, plus the few dinars I keep in my pouch, and don't look real close for anything else."

"Clever."

"Thanks," I replied absently, as I sorted through one of the boxes. I'm small and rather on the scrawny side, never having had the sort of body that puts on muscle easily. And, if the truth be told, I've never had the inclination to spend hours doing the sweaty exercises necessary to build muscle, nor do I intend to start doing so now, at my age. I'll leave that particular form of masochism to the young dudes. (Okay, so in other words, I'm lazy. Satisfied?)

"The way I figure it," I continued, "if you don't have muscles, you've got to have brains. Right?"

"Good point."

He seemed to be having a problem deciding what he wanted to wear, so I remarked casually, "I think the light blue one on the end would look good on you."

He took it off the rack. "Really?"

"Yeah."

"Okay."

I held the jewelry box out to him. "Here. Want to borrow a ring? Or a chain or something? Take your choice."

"Oh, I couldn't."

I shrugged. "Why not? It's not like I don't have plenty of them. I'm a jewelry merchant, remember?" Of course, I used to have a lot more of the expensive types of gems, before I got involved with Dahok and sold them to finance his new religion. But I wasn't going to mention that to Iolaus. After all, it wasn't his fault that he looked the same as Dahok had, when that son-of-a-bitch wrapped me around his little finger and took me for whatever he could get. (Okay, so perhaps it wasn't exactly his finger that he had had me wrapped around, but rather another part of his anatomy.) But all that was in the past. 

I picked up a pale blue moonstone ring. "Here. This will look good with that outfit. It fits my middle finger, so it might work for you as a pinky ring." I fluttered him an elaborate gesture with one hand. "My fingers are somewhat thinner than yours, see?"

Laughing, he tried on the ring. It fit, just as I had figured.

For myself, I chose a cameo ring carved from tiger-eye, plus a somewhat gaudy golden topaz pendant. Nothing too expensive. As I draped the chain of the pendant over my head, I said, "I don't get to wear my jewelry much around here. Only on special occasions." I grinned at him and leered comically. "You're a special occasion, gorgeous."

He laughed and shook his head. "Be serious."

"You don't think I'm serious?" I replied, smiling archly. "Have you looked in a mirror lately?"

He laughed again. Gods, did he truly not realize how beautiful he was?

As he unbuttoned his tunic and took it off, I guess the expression on my face must have shown pretty clearly what I was thinking. Or maybe it was the interest that another part of me was starting to show in him that caught his attention.

"Uh –- Euphonius?" he began hesitantly. "There's –- something I have to tell you."

Uh-oh. That particular phrase rarely means it's something good. At that moment, I'd have laid odds that he and Hercules had gotten together and he wasn't interested in screwing around with me anymore. My heart sank.

"What is it?" I asked, already mentally bracing myself against whatever he was about to say.

That's when Ysabel rapped quickly on the door and came bustling in with a couple of jugs of hot water, followed by Daria carrying an armload of towels.

Iolaus and I exchanged looks as she poured some of the water in the basin in the washstand, then proceeded to fuss with laying out the towels for us.

"Sometimes," I said very softly, "her timing leaves a lot to be desired." I shrugged. "Whatever it is, we can talk about it later on. Okay?"

He nodded. "Maybe that would be better. I'm –- I'm actually kind of nervous right now anyway, about meeting Erytheia."

"Later then," I agreed. "Come on. Let's get washed up before that water gets cold."

 

He hadn't been kidding about being worried over Erytheia. I could see the way he moved as we walked into the village, and his face looked as if he were trying hard not to throw up. His nerves must have been tied in knots.

"Look, you don't have to do this, you know," I suggested, as we rounded a corner.

"I want to," was the tight-lipped response.

"Okay then. That's their house right over there. Let me go first."

He nodded, still looking as if he might vomit any time now. Or worse, faint dead away.

I stepped up on the porch and knocked on the door, almost hoping she wasn't at home. 

No such luck. Erytheia quickly appeared in the doorway. "Oh, hello, Euphonius," she said, with her usual warm smile. "How nice to see you! Do come in."

"Erytheia, there's someone out here who'd like to meet you. Remember I told you about --"

I didn't get any further before she had bustled past me and was out on the porch, staring at my companion. 

"Iolaus?" she said disbelievingly. 

He nodded and went a shade paler. "That's my name, but I'm not –-"

"I know, dear. Euphonius explained it all to me." Her voice quavered a little. 

He started to turn away. "Maybe I shouldn't have come."

"Oh no, no! I'm very happy to see you." Erytheia took his arm. "It's -- well, it's just a bit of a shock, that's all. Please, come inside, both of you. Pandion's in the village getting a few things for me, but he'll be back soon. We've talked about you. I've been hoping you'd come by."

He smiled that bright smile then, but I could see the tears shining in his eyes. "Really?"

Erytheia's only response was to wrap her arms around him and draw him into an embrace, which he returned immediately. They both started to cry. (Okay, so I started to cry also. What else did you expect? Was I supposed to just stand there?)

Everything went great after that, until Erytheia's husband came home. Even then, it wasn't his fault. It was the three men who arrived at the door practically on his heels.

"Are you Pandion, the poet?" the nastiest-looking one of them demanded, not even bothering to ask permission before barging into the house.

"I am," the older man replied with dignity.

"Come with us."

"Wait a minute. Where are you taking him?" I stepped forward so as to block their way. 

The lead goon favored me with a glare. "He's under arrest for sedition."

"Sedition?! That's ridiculous! What did he do?"

"That's none of your business. Don't worry, he'll get a fair trial."

Iolaus came over by my side. "Somehow, I doubt that," he said.

"And just who are you?"

I pulled Iolaus back behind me.

"He's my guest. No one you need concern yourself about."

The lead goon looked me over more closely. "Aren't you that jewelry merchant, Eunonymous?"

"Euphonius," I corrected him brusquely. "Yeah, that's me. And I still want to know what Pandion did to deserve this."

The poet took a small scroll out of his pocket and handed it to me. "I think this will explain things pretty well," he said.

Puzzled, I unrolled the scroll and read it through, with Iolaus looking over my shoulder.

"The Song of the Grape"*

With fingertips weary and torn,  
And naught in her stomach but rhymes,  
A young woman stands, dressed only in rags,  
Reaching among the vines.

"Pick – pick – pick!" she says,  
"While the cock is crowing aloof;  
And pick – pick – pick  
Till the stars shine through the roof!

"Work – work – work," she sighs,  
"Till my brain begins to swim;  
Work – work – work  
Till my eyes are heavy and dim!

"Pick – pick – pick!" she says,  
"My labor never flags;  
And what are its wages? A bed of straw,  
A crust of bread – and rags.

"Work –work—work!" she cries,   
"From weary chime to chime,  
Work – work – work –  
As prisoners work for crime!

"Oh, men with sisters dear!  
Oh, men with mothers and wives!  
It is not wine you're drinking here,  
But human creatures' lives!"

She brushes off a weary tear  
And tries hard not to weep.  
O Gods! That bread should be so dear,  
And flesh and blood so cheap!

 

I was frankly surprised at Pandion's daring to write such a thing. It was a far cry from the sophisticated sort of verse he generally produced. This would appeal to the common folk –- and I could easily see why it did not appeal to Krathes. However –-

"This is hardly what I would call sedition," I objected. "It's poetry. There's nothing illegal about writing poetry."

"What do I care what you would call it? Krathes runs things in this town and he says bring this guy in. Now suppose you just step aside and let us do our job, okay?"

I didn't move. The fear was creeping into my heart now, but I was ashamed to back down in front of everyone.

"I'm warning you, merchant," the goon went on, glowering at me. "Keep out of this, unless you want to go to jail for obstructing justice."

"Some justice," Iolaus put in sourly, still behind me.

"Stay out of this," I said to him in an undertone.

"Euphonius -–" he started to object.

"Please. This isn't your concern." I turned back to the thug. "I'm not moving. Take your friends and get out of here."

"Okay, you asked for it."

I'm sorry to report that it took very little effort for them to grab me and toss me against the wall. I'm not much good at hand to hand fighting. As I struggled to sit up, Iolaus came over to help me, feeling through my hair for any damage to the back of my head. He touched a place that made me wince and his hand came away sticky with blood, so I figured I'd landed pretty hard. Nevertheless, I was going to try again when Pandion said firmly, "Don't, Euphonius. You'll be of no help to anyone if they throw you in prison too."

In or out of prison, I didn't think I'd be of much help to anyone in any case. However, I did feel bad enough, not to mention scared enough, that I used his remark as an excuse to stay down, even as I berated myself for doing so.

The three goons dragged the poet out the door. Erytheia collapsed onto a chair, burying her face in her hands and sobbing.

Iolaus and I glanced at each other uncomfortably. 

"I'm okay. Go to her," I said.

He got up and put an arm around the old woman's shoulders. "It'll be all right," I heard him murmur to her. "Hercules is going to meet me here tomorrow. When he hears what's going on, he'll fix everything. You'll see."

Erytheia let herself be comforted, her tears slowly subsiding. All I felt was shame, and a growing anger that I hadn't been able to stop what had happened, and perhaps hadn't even tried as hard as I could have. Somehow, the idea that our best hope lay in waiting for a do-gooder of a demi-God to arrive did nothing to lessen my resentment. Besides which, this was the first I had heard of Hercules' imminent arrival. So okay, I'm jealous of him. Always have been, ever since I had met the other Iolaus and found out he and Hercules were lovers. I had always figured it was just a matter of time before the bastard son of Zeus and this Iolaus ended up in the same sort of relationship.

 

The day went downhill from there. Iolaus and Erytheia spent the rest of the afternoon talking, but Pandion's plight hung over their meeting like a pall.

The evening meal back at my house was a disaster. Iolaus was clearly forcing himself to eat and be polite to Ysabel and Daria, and I was mostly silent, still thinking depressing and resentful thoughts about what had happened that day and about what was probably happening between Iolaus and Hercules.

Tactful as always, Ysabel sent her daughter to spend the night at a friend's house soon after the meal was over, then retired to her own suite of rooms in the side wing of the house, leaving Iolaus and me alone on the porch to watch the sun set over the hills. She had unobtrusively supplied us with a bottle of wine before bidding us a good evening.

Ignoring the various chairs, Iolaus sat down with a sigh on the top step of the porch and stared out at the lowering sun. I considered my options, then settled on filling the wineglasses, sitting down next to him, and offering him one.

"Here you go," I prompted, drawing his attention back from the far distance. He still seemed abstracted as he took a swallow of the excellent wine. "Not a really good visit so far, huh?"

"Don't worry. When Hercules gets here, he'll make things right."

"Yeah, I know. That's what you told Erytheia." Not the topic I wanted to discuss. Nevertheless, I couldn't help adding sourly, "But why does it have to be that way?"

He turned to me, looking puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"Well, it just seems like it's always 'Hercules, help us!' 'Hercules, do something!'. Why is it always up to him to fix our problems?" I said, perhaps with more heat than I had intended. 

"He's half God, for one thing," Iolaus pointed out reasonably. "And he's stronger than anyone else. He's –-"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. But he's still only one man. Why are all the problems in the world his exclusive responsibility? What about the rest of us? Are we nothing but a pack of craven cowards, unable to deal with things for ourselves?"

Yeah, I guess I got a little angry here, and it probably showed in my voice. But remember, I was pretty sure Iolaus was about to break it to me gently that we were through, because he loved Hercules now. I wasn't in exactly the best frame of mind.

"Euphonius, he's a trained warrior," the other man pointed out. "He knows how to fight. We don't. Or at least, not very well." He hesitated for a moment, as a pained expression crossed his face. "But yeah, I think I know what you mean. It's frustrating sometimes, isn't it?"

"Uh-huh." Almost as frustrating as being here so close to you and not being sure if you want me to get any closer.

"But what else can we do?" he went on. "You and I can't go up against Krathes by ourselves. We'd just end up in prison with Pandion. Or dead."

I sighed. "I know. But still –-"

"But still it hurts to have to think of yourself as a wimp, doesn't it?" he finished for me. "Always running to the big guy for help?"

I nodded glumly. The silence lengthened uncomfortably, as we both faced away to watch the dying light in the sky. It hadn't even been a very interesting sunset.

Finally, I decided the time had come to find out just how things stood between us. Draining my glass, I set it down behind me. Then I draped one arm around the other man's shoulder, simultaneously running my other hand up his thigh as I suggested brightly, "Hey, don't we have better things to do right now than sit here thinking of ourselves as wimps?"

He grabbed the hand on his thigh and stopped my upward progress just short of its goal, but he didn't move out of my arms. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about."

"Okay, so talk. I'm listening."

"I –- I met someone."

Not exactly how I'd expect him to begin telling me about Hercules.

"Someone?" I prompted.

"Yeah. Her name's Nautica." An infatuated expression crossed his face, then turned to wistful sorrow as he continued, "She's a mermaid."

"A mermaid?! You're in love with a mermaid?!" I said, almost shouting. Gods, I had been prepared to lose him to another man, but not like this. "You have got to be kidding!"

I had been startled enough by this pronouncement to lean back away from him a bit. I could see the misery on his face, as I watched his profile. His lips clenched together before he spoke, and his words echoed the desolation he was so obviously feeling.

"I almost wish I were, because I just don't know of any way we're going to be able to be together."

With an unhappy sigh, I took my hand off of his leg.

"Okay, tell me all about it. Who is she? How'd you two meet?"

"You really want to know? I mean, you can't be too pleased about this, all things considered."

"Well, it's not what I thought you'd say, and it's certainly not what I wanted to hear you say. I won't lie about that. But, yeah, I do want to know."

It was fairly dark by now, and the first bugs of the evening were starting to come out. I swatted at an intrusive gnat, then stood up and dragged my companion to his feet. "Let's go inside. This sounds like a long story and we need to be more comfortable."

Picking up the wine bottle in one hand, I led Iolaus into the darkened house with the other. He followed without objection until he realized we were in my bedroom, then he pulled away from me with a certain amount of consternation on his face. I knew pretty well what he was thinking.

I flopped down on the bed, folded up the pillows to make a decent backrest, and patted the space next to me. "Sit down, relax, and tell me about your lady love," I invited. "That's all."

After only a moment of hesitation, he took me up on the offer, settling cross-legged next to me on the mattress and relating the tale of Triton's daughter, who had fled the ocean to avoid an unwelcome marriage, only to find herself in love on the land with a man she could not have.

I listened, spellbound, even as I cried inside.

It was rather ironic, really. I wanted him more than life itself, and he wanted someone else, just as the other Iolaus had. And not just any old someone else either. Not even just an ordinary woman. Oh no. It had to be something exotic. How in Tartarus do you compete with a mermaid? How do you even try?

Perhaps the very unwelcome answer is that you don't. His heart is given elsewhere. It will never be yours, I told myself sternly.

Iolaus finished the story, his voice shaking uncontrollably as he described taking her back to the ocean and watching her swim away. He fell silent for a moment, wiped his eyes, and took a shaky breath. Then he turned to me and went on, "I don't know how to explain this. It's like when I'm with Nautica, I'm the person I've always wanted to be. I'm not afraid anymore. I care more about her life and well-being than I do for my own. I mean, I went after her, when she'd been captured by Discord's thugs. Me, the clown, the jester, the ultimate wimp! I only knew I had to save her and keep her from harm. I wasn't thinking about what might happen to me. That just didn't seem important at the time. Do you understand what I mean?"

"Yeah. I think so." Every time I look at you, if you really want to know. 

He smiled gamely. "Maybe now that I know what it feels like to be brave, I'll be able to do it again, even without her."

"Sure, why not?"

He frowned and turned away.

"Oh, who am I kidding? That was a fluke. It was only because I had to protect her. When she was with me, I felt like a man. Now --" he shrugged helplessly -- "I'm just me again. If I think I can be a hero like Hercules, I'm just fooling myself."

"Look, you don't have to be a hero like Hercules," I pointed out, still trying to get my own runaway feelings under control. "We can't all be heroes like him. He's the son of a God, so it's easy. He's probably got more strength in his left wrist than most men have in their entire bodies. His power and strength is his blessing -- or perhaps his curse. He has the choice to use that gift for good, or for evil. The choices he makes are his choices and his responsibility. Ordinary mortals like us have other choices to make. You only have to be yourself, whatever that is."

"But the other Iolaus --"

"Oh, screw the other Iolaus!" I exclaimed impatiently. "You're not him. You don't have to be like him. Case closed. End of sentence. Besides," I added, "I like you the way you are."

"You really mean that?"

Gods, he sounds as if that possibility had never occurred to him!

"Of course I do." By way of showing him just how much I meant it, I kissed him on the lips. I couldn't help it. He was so close, and so fucking beautiful.

Okay, so maybe I had no business coming on to him at that particular moment, but I had this sinking feeling in my heart that he and his lady love just might get together one day, despite the odds. This could very well be my last chance.

He didn't pull away really fast, and when he did, he said softly, "Do you still want me?" 

"Do you even have to ask?"

He laughed that strange upscale giggle of his. "No, I guess not. I'm just not too sure about this. I mean, Nautica --"

"Look, it's not like you're married to her," I said, cutting him off. "You're not even engaged or anything. In fact, you don't even know if you'll ever see her again, right?"

He nodded unhappily. 

I pressed my advantage. "As of now, you're still free to do whatever you want."

"It just doesn't seem ethical somehow."

"If things do work out between you and your little mermaid, and the time comes when it's good-bye, then it's good-bye. I can respect that and I can deal with it. But that time hasn't come just yet, has it? You still want me."

That last was merely a statement of fact. I could see the evidence of his desire between his legs, and I knew I'd won this debate.

"Yeah, I do," he admitted. "But –-"

"But--?" I prompted, pulling him back to lie against me. He didn't resist. In fact, he squirmed rather eagerly into my arms.

"But I'm confused. I love Nautica, yet I still like this. But she's a woman –-"

"And I'm a man," I finished for him. "So what's the problem?"

"I just always thought -- I mean --" He ran a hand through his fair hair. "Gods, I don't know what I mean anymore!"

"Iolaus, my dear, even I myself have been known to make love to a woman, on occasion. It's not always just one or the other. There's a whole world in between."

"Yeah, I know. But --"

"No buts," I said firmly, cutting off any further protests by sliding my hand down the soft blue fabric of the borrowed clothing he wore and getting a good hold on his hard cock. He didn't say anything else after that. Not for quite a while.

Now, I've read some drippingly-descriptive but totally unrealistic descriptions of sex where men are hung like stallions and shoot their cum so hard they splatter the walls, while simultaneously bellowing like a herd of wild animals and proclaiming their undying love for each other. Sorry to disappoint you, folks, but it usually doesn't happen quite that way. 

Oh yeah, sex can be pretty terrific, and it's still the greatest show on earth, especially if you also care for your partner. But let's have a little realism here, huh? The earth doesn't really move. It just feels as if it does. And it sure felt that way that night, even if we were both just human beings and not super-studs.

But you want to know something? In the final analysis, what mattered most wasn't really who came, or how many times, or how good it felt. The memories I'll keep most dear to my heart will be the other things, like the expression on his face when he was lost in passion, and the feel of his body under my fingers, and the unguarded words of longing and encouragement, and his lips, yielding or demanding against mine.

Oh yes, maybe the other part of it is what fascinates the youngsters, but, delicious as it is, I'm too old for that to be the only reason for wanting someone in my bed.

 

When we had finally worn each other out, Iolaus fell asleep first. I did the corny old thing you always read about but seldom do in practice: I lay there and watched him sleep.

We were still more or less entwined, since his head had been resting on my shoulder when he'd dozed off. My arm was already numb and tingly, but it was so good to have him next to me that I didn't dare move lest I should disturb him. I still felt this terrible premonition that I'd never hold him again, after tonight. For one thing, Hercules would be here tomorrow. Even if they weren't lovers, his presence would make this sort of thing more difficult. Then there was that thrice-accursed mermaid who had won his heart.

I studied his face with a kind of grim determination, so I'd be sure to remember exactly how he looked after he was gone.

And I couldn't help but remember that other, almost identical face, in the same shadowed moonlight on the one single night we had spent together.

And I felt the anger burning in my heart, and heard again the curse I'd flung at Dahok, as I'd watched the lifeless body lying on the altar.

"I'm still out to get you, you son-of-a-bitch," I whispered almost inaudibly to the night and the Darkness. "If I ever figure out a way to do it, that is."

Even as I lay staring at the man slumbering peacefully beside me, I saw yet another face overlaid on his, a face with glowing red eyes. And I heard the mocking voice say once again, "Zarathustra, have a thousand winters taught you nothing? I'm as much a part of this world as the light that warms the day."

Now, quite a lot of what I had overheard Dahok saying to Hercules during that awful time was actually the truth. Perhaps the real power of evil comes from its ability to intermix truth and lies, until you can't tell one from the other anymore.

In an effort to separate the truth from the lies, I had spent some time on my last trip to Athens looking up Zarathustra's writings in one of the libraries.

His philosophy, to put it very simply, is that there is one God, Ahura Mazda, who created the universe. However, the universe works on the basis of moral dualism. There is the Impulse to Create and the Impulse to Destroy. We are not under orders from Ahura Mazda to follow one course of action or another. Instead, we mortals have been granted the freedom to choose between these two forces. Having chosen, we must then be prepared to face the consequences of our choices. The right choice would bring happiness and bliss; the wrong one only suffering and misery.

I found this to be as reasonable a description of the universe as any other, so I'd been thinking about it quite a lot. I hadn't figured out where the usual collection of Gods fit into this scheme of things, but I was working on it. 

In my mind, Dahok was a personification of Zarathustra's Impulse to Destroy. If this were true, he wasn't gone, could never be destroyed, but had only been pushed a little further away, as the balance swung forever back and forth between the Light and the Darkness.

When I finally fell asleep, it was only to flounder in a morass of nightmare, where the brooding form of Ultimate Evil hovered eternally over humankind, awaiting only its next opportunity to manifest, while I just stood there, futilely screaming curses against it.

 

Just as Iolaus had predicted, Hercules arrived in Lydicea the next day. It was mid-morning when he got there, and we were at Erytheia's house, trying to keep her spirits up in the absence of any news of Pandion's situation.

While Iolaus sat talking to the older woman, one arm around her waist, I sat watching him, as surreptitiously as possible. He wore another borrowed outfit, since Ysabel was still busy cleaning and mending his own clothes. This time he had plain brown trousers and a simple pale gold shirt with long full sleeves and an embroidered collar. He'd picked this one out of my wardrobe himself and I had to admit it looked far better on him than it ever had on me.

The first clue we had that Hercules was in town was when he showed up in the doorway, knocking rather tentatively on the frame as he stood peering from the bright outdoor sunshine into the relative obscurity within.

"Iolaus?" he asked, as if uncertain that he'd come to the right place.

Iolaus' face brightened at the sound of his name, and he flashed his smile at Erytheia as if to say, "See? It'll be okay now."

"Yeah, Hercules," he called out. "Over here. Come on in!"

Introductions were quickly made all around. Of course, I already knew who he was, since I'd been a rather unwilling witness to his confrontation with Dahok in Iolaus' body. I didn't think Hercules knew me though, unless he'd caught sight of my face in the crowd somewhere. I suppose some part of me wished he would remember, but a larger part devoutly hoped he wouldn't.

Be that as it may, he did give me a rather strange look as he nodded in acknowledgement of my name and the info that I was the friend Iolaus had told him about who lived in this village.

Iolaus rapidly filled him in on how Pandion had been taken prisoner. I just stayed out of the way and watched, except when Iolaus referred Hercules to me to explain further about the situation in town. Even then I kept my answers as direct and succinct as I could. I just didn't feel comfortable around him, for a variety of reasons. I preferred to fade into the woodwork. I'm good at that.

We had just about gotten Hercules up to speed when Ysabel rushed through the door, red-faced and out of breath.

"Euphonius," she gasped, "they're going to execute him! You've got to do something!"

"Hold on," I told the frantic woman. "Sit down, catch your breath. Who's being executed?"

"Pandion! Krathes is going to have him beheaded! It was just announced in the marketplace. They've got him there now!"

As Erytheia gasped in shock, Hercules leapt to his feet and ran out the door. Iolaus recovered from his surprise faster than the rest of us and was hot on the big man's heels, with the two women and me bringing up the rear.

Ysabel's report had been all too accurate: there was already a black-clad executioner taking a few practice swings with his axe at the wooden block set up in a cleared space in the center of the market. Pandion, his hands tied behind his back, stood between two of Krathes' thugs, doing his best to look dignified and unafraid.

Krathes stood near the executioner's block, arms crossed on his chest, appearing rather pleased with himself as one of his henchmen read the sentence pronounced on the condemned poet.

There was quite a mob of townspeople mixed in with the paid goons at Krathes' back, mostly armed with makeshift weapons of various sorts. Although they stood in close ranks behind their apparent leader, they shifted uncomfortably and didn't really look too happy about the situation. I knew many of these men: if they were following Krathes, they weren't doing it because they particularly liked the idea. He must have threatened them with something.

Hercules stepped up in front of Krathes, while the rest of us were still trying to push our way through the crowd that filled the marketplace.

"I think we've had about enough of this nonsense," he said loudly. "Let him go."

Krathes eyed the newcomer distastefully but without fear. "And just who might you be?" he asked haughtily.

"A friend of the man you propose to kill."

Krathes' narrowed his eyes and examined the demi-God with new interest. "You're Hercules, aren't you? I heard a rumor that you were in the area." He smiled. "Well, you'd do well not to interfere in matters you know nothing about."

"I know this man did nothing more than write a poem you didn't like. Since when is bad poetry a capital offense?"

A couple of people in the crowd dared to laugh. Krathes was not pleased. He gestured to his goons and Pandion was shoved forward onto his knees, his head forced down onto the block.

"You don't listen too well, do you, big man?" Krathes announced loudly. "I told you this is none of your business."

As the executioner lifted his axe, Erytheia screamed out her husband's name.

With a quick bound forward, Hercules caught the upraised axe and jerked it from the other man's hands.

"I'm making it my business," he replied, grabbing Pandion and thrusting the poet behind him.

Iolaus had reached the front of the crowd by now. He took hold of Pandion and started untying his hands. Erytheia and I were there in the next instant, pulling both Pandion and Iolaus back into the safety of the milling crowd.

Krathes, not at all pleased with this development, waved his troops forward. "Kill him!" he shouted, pointing a finger at Hercules.

Rather predictably, a general melee ensued, with Krathes' entire mob of recruited townsfolk making a half-hearted effort to do as commanded, while they were urged on and aided by the relatively few actual warriors in Krathes' employ. Hercules clearly understood the nature of his attackers, as he did his best not to hurt anyone. However, this very consideration made it all the harder for him to defend himself, as he was virtually overwhelmed with bodies and wasn't always certain which of them were truly dangerous opponents.

Krathes stood in a relatively clear space by himself, smugly watching the chaos he had set in progress. He had every right to be smug, since the demi-God was beginning to get the worst of things.

Iolaus stood next to me, watching. When Hercules went down for the second time, covered in thrashing bodies, Iolaus turned to me. "Euphonius? What you said last night, about how it shouldn't always be up to him?"

"Yeah?" I replied, suddenly noticing the frown on his face and the determined set of his lips.

"You're right."

He pulled a pole loose from a nearby merchant's tent and headed straight for Krathes, shouting, "Call them off! Now!"

"Iolaus, no!" I protested. But he ignored me, as I knew he would.

Iolaus got in one good blow with the pole before Krathes realized he was under attack. Then the bigger man drew his sword. Iolaus held him off, dodging, leaping, and just generally managing not to occupy the same bit of space as that sweeping blade, while getting in a surprising number of jabs with his makeshift staff.

It occurred to me that perhaps I should try to help him somehow. And yet I hesitated, torn between fear and guilt, and knowing how totally inept I was at fighting.

Besides, Iolaus was doing fairly well by himself. I was amazed at his courage, not to mention some of the rather goofy stunts he threw in now and then to confuse his opponent.

Then I saw how hard he was breathing and I knew he couldn't possibly keep it up much longer, not against a larger and better-armed opponent. It could only be a matter of time before he'd wear out, or make a fatal mistake.

And still I hesitated, watching him battle overwhelming odds for the sake of justice and his friends' lives.

That's when I heard a voice in my head, a very familiar voice that I had thought never to hear again, or at least not from its original owner.

"Euphonius, this is what it truly means to oppose Dahok. Everywhere and always, stand up against the Impulse to Destroy, in whatever form it takes. Speak what is true and do what is right, regardless of the consequences. You may never win the final victory, but you can take your place on the side of Light, and not Darkness."

That's when I realized what I should have known all along: it really is just that simple. The only way to get back at Dahok is to do whatever you can to stop the spread of darkness and evil in the world, and to further the cause of goodness and light. When you put it like that, it sounds pretty sappy, doesn't it? But that's the bottom line. And you know what? In the final analysis, it just may take more courage than fighting monsters.

Just now though, it was obviously taking all the courage Iolaus had.

I saw the sword slash across his body; a glancing blow, since he'd been twisting away and out of reach as it connected, but it was enough to drop him to the ground, clutching the side of his chest. Beneath his fingers, red blood stained the pale gold shirt. He tried to get to his feet, but his face went dead white and he collapsed limply to the ground again.

Krathes laughed and kicked his fallen opponent cruelly. As he began to raise his sword for a killing blow, time slowed and focused for me, as it has a way of doing in times of great danger. My first impulse was to shout to Hercules for help, but there was no way the demi-God could reach Iolaus in time, since he was still buried under his own adversaries. I wasn't even sure Hercules had seen his friend's peril.

I was close enough, but I had no weapon that could stop Krathes.

Or did I? Glancing around desperately, my eye fell on one of the merchant's booths, where a number of ornate broadswords lay shining in the noonday light. Useless to me, as I haven't the strength or training to use them. But nestled among the heavy weapons was a narrow-bladed, much lighter sword of a kind I recognized from a long, long time ago. The slender blade was rusted and wanted care, obviously not something most people would consider using. My fingers closed around the hilt before I even thought about it, and the rapier was in my hand.

"Leave him alone, asshole!" I called out, running across the street to confront Krathes where he stood over Iolaus.

The big man turned toward me, a look of surprised pleasure coming over his face. His broadsword swung around to point at me. "I thought you had already learned not to interfere, merchant. Do you need another lesson?"

I tried to meet his eyes without flinching, but inside I was rapidly turning into terrified mush. I'm no swashbuckling hero. Whatever did I think I was doing here? 

My hesitation must have shown on my face, because Krathes went on unctuously, "That's what I thought. Now, get out of my way. I'm going to slice this meddlesome little twerp into so many pieces that there won't be enough left of him to bury."

One moment I had been so scared I was about to wet my pants, but then all that changed. Iolaus had fought the Darkness, irregardless of the cost. If he could do it, so could I.

I raised the rapier in front of me. "You touch him only over my cold, dead body," I said slowly, and unoriginally, I fear.

Krathes gave a short laugh and raised his sword. "That can be arranged," he replied, just as unoriginally. 

The man might have been big, but he was also clumsy and overconfident. Each time the sword came at me, I ducked or sidestepped, retreating steadily backwards in order to lure him away from Iolaus. 

"Stand still and fight, you coward," he bellowed.

I shook my head. "Uh-uh. You come and get me, if you think you can." 

I took a few deliberately ineffectual swipes at him with my rapier as I continued to back up.

Krathes laughed loudly. "You call that thing a weapon?" he taunted, as he stepped toward me and swung again, even more violently than before.

"Well, actually –-" I began, as the heavy sword came down in a vicious slash that nicked my left shoulder as I dodged aside. I lunged forward and ran my narrow blade straight through his chest, twisting it as hard as I could before wrenching it loose. "-- yes, I do," I finished, as Krathes looked down at the blood spreading across his shirt. He stood there stupidly, as if he couldn't believe what had happened.

The one thing you don't do is stop, just because you got in one good hit. I ran him through the body again, and was aiming a third blow at his throat when his eyes rolled up and he fell backwards into the street. For a moment, I just stared at him, almost as surprised as he had been.

Once I realized I was no longer in danger, I turned my attention back to Iolaus. Erytheia and Ysabel had gone to him as soon as I'd lured Krathes away. Erytheia held his head, while my redoubtable housekeeper pressed the bunched-up pieces of his shirt against the cut on his chest. I started towards them, but Hercules beat me to it. By the time I got close, he was leaning over his friend, anxiously examining the damage.

"Iolaus?" I heard him say softly.

Ysabel was the one to reply, her eyes focused on her makeshift bandage and the amount of blood leaking through it. "We need to get him back to my house, so I can stitch up that wound."

Hercules nodded, taking hold of Iolaus and lifting him in his arms as easily as another man might lift a child. 

This brought the wounded man around. He grimaced then opened his eyes blearily. "Hercules?" 

"It's okay, buddy. Just take it easy. You'll be fine."

Iolaus let his head loll against the big man's shoulder with a sigh. Hercules strode swiftly toward my house, following Ysabel's directions. I started after them, but was stopped by a hand on my arm.

"Keep the little sword," said the owner of that hand, smiling broadly. I recognized him as one of the town merchants, obviously the one from whose booth I had grabbed the weapon. He held out a narrow leather scabbard. "It's worth the price, and more, to be rid of Krathes."

"Thanks," I replied distractedly. Truth to be told, I had forgotten I still held the bloody rapier. I wiped the blade on the edge of my tunic, slid it into the scabbard, and ran off after Hercules.

By the time I caught up, they had already gotten to my house. The main room was empty. I saw Daria coming through the archway, carrying a bowl of water.

"Where --?" I started.

"It's okay, Uncle Euphonius. My mother's taking care of him." She nodded back in the direction she had come. "They're in my bedroom." Before I could even start to go around her, she added, "Mother says no one should go in. She's busy. That big man is in there with her."

I felt pretty useless, but at least everything seemed to be under control. Daria eyed me closely.

"Uncle Euphonius," she said sternly, "come over here and sit down."

"What for?"

"So I can fix your shoulder. It's bleeding."

And so it was. Until Daria had brought it to my attention, it hadn't hurt. Now it decided to make up for lost time. I sat down, feeling suddenly light-headed. I didn't even question the fact that it was a child tearing my shirt away from the cut and carefully cleaning the wound with a wet cloth. I just clenched my teeth together and worried about Iolaus. I knew he had to be in much worse shape than I was. I also knew it wasn't much fun to have a sizable gash stitched together, since I had watched Ysabel at work on such things before. Still, I didn't hear any screaming coming from the other room, nor any weeping and wailing which might have indicated that the silence was anything other than a good thing.

"Uncle Euphonius?" Daria interrupted my thoughts as she dropped the wet cloth into the basin and picked up some dry bandages. Without waiting for an acknowledgement from me, she went on, "You really like Iolaus, don't you?"

"Yes, dear. He's a very good friend."

She placed a pad of material over the now-only-slightly-bleeding cut on my shoulder, pressing hard. "He's more than just a friend, isn't he?"

"Uh –- Dari --"

"I'm not a baby anymore, Uncle Euphonius. You can tell me the truth."

I looked up at the little girl so expertly tending my wound, and gave her the kind of smile an adult gives a favored child. "I can, huh?"

"Yes," she replied solemnly. "You and Iolaus are lovers, aren't you?"

Gods, had she really grown up so quickly, and I hadn't noticed?!

When I answered her question, my voice had lost its patronizing tone and the smile on my face had changed. "I didn't know it was so obvious."

"It is to me." She lifted the pad, nodding in satisfaction at the lack of fresh blood, just as I had seen her mother do countless times for others.

"Well then," I replied, "I guess you could say that Iolaus and I are good friends, and sometimes lovers, if you wanted to."

"Good."

"Why good?"

"Because I like Iolaus." She picked up more bandages. "Now take off your shirt. I need to wrap this around your chest and over your shoulder in order to get it to hold the dressing in place."

I obeyed my little nurse, still smiling at how grown up she'd become. 

Daria had barely finished what she was doing when Ysabel came bustling out of the other room. I jumped immediately to my feet.

"How is he?" I asked.

"Relax. He'll be fine." She handed a basin of very red water to her daughter, saying, "Here. Get rid of this, please." 

Without a word, the girl did as she was instructed. Before she had left the room, her mother had taken in the bandage around my chest with a practiced eye. "Good job, Dari," she called. Then she turned back to me. "It took quite a few stitches to close that gash, but it wasn't very deep. It should heal without any problems."

"Okay if I go in now?"

Ysabel almost refused. I saw it in her face. Then her expression softened as she looked at me. "Yes. But be quiet. I gave him some poppy juice, so he may be asleep."

I opened the door very quietly and slipped inside the small room. Hercules sat on the edge of the bed, turned partly away from me. One of his hands was on Iolaus' arm, while the other rested on the sleeping man's forehead, absently brushing back a wave of blond hair. I figured he hadn't heard me come in, since he hadn't turned to see who it was. I didn't speak for a moment, watching the two of them together.

There was something here I didn't quite understand. The naked look of love and longing on the big man's face didn't jibe with the fact that he and this Iolaus weren't actually lovers, as far as I knew. In fact, he had to know about the mermaid who had won his friend's heart. If Iolaus had told me, he had to have told Hercules. So why --?

Come on now, Euphonius, said that voice I had heard just a little while ago in my mind, talking about resisting Dahok. It isn't that hard to figure out, is it?

All of a sudden, it wasn't hard at all.

He still loves you, doesn't he? I said wordlessly to the voice of the dead Iolaus. And he'd like to love that part of you that he sees in this other Iolaus, but he won't, because he knows this Iolaus doesn't feel that way about him, and he's just too nice a guy to force the issue? Am I right?

You got it, was the reply. It managed to sound somehow less than happy.

I was less than happy about that particular moment of insight myself. I would have preferred to continue resenting Hercules, rather than respecting him for his restraint and caring, not to mention empathizing with his love.

I shuffled my feet and deliberately pushed against the door, trying to sound as if I'd just come into the room. Hercules looked around.

"How's he doing?" I asked softly.

"Good. Sleeping." The big man looked a little closer at me, a slight frown creasing his forehead below the fringe of hair hanging into his face. "I saw you fighting with Krathes. Where'd you learn to use a little sword like that?"

I perched carefully at the foot of the bed, lifting the sheathed rapier I still held clutched in my right hand so that it rested across my lap. When this was all over, I'd have to clean it up good and see if I could restore it to its original condition.

"Well," I began, "there was this young prince I met, many years ago. He was quite a womanizer and drank way too much for his own good, but I saw him practicing with a sword like this when I was at court selling some jewelry to his father. It was one of my first big sales, if I remember correctly. I didn't have the strength to handle a broadsword, but this sort of thing --" I raised the rapier slightly –- "looked like something I could manage, so I asked him to show me how he did it. He was more than glad to find someone else interested in his rather impractical weapon, so I stayed a few weeks and learned how it worked. Come to think of it, he was about Iolaus' height and looked a little bit like him, except he was skinnier and wore his hair much shorter. But that was a long time ago and we were both quite young."

I smiled to myself, thinking of the other activities the young man and I had enjoyed in addition to our weapons practice.

Hercules smiled also. "I think I just might know who that prince was, although I never met him personally."

"Really?"

I was about to ask for more details when Ysabel ducked into the room to check on her patient. Satisfied that he was doing fine, she shooed me out. I knew better than to argue with my redoubtable housekeeper, so I never did get the chance to ask Hercules more about Orestes.

 

There isn't much to tell after that. With Krathes dead and no other living relatives to be found, all the property went to the tenants, due to a previously-unknown arrangement Nicander had made prior to his own death. When that news was made public, the town immediately declared a celebration. The festivities spanned the next few days, and the stream of people coming by my house never stopped. Many of them just wanted to meet the famous Hercules, or see this new incarnation of Iolaus, but some also wanted to thank me for the part I had played in Krathes' death. I was very surprised to be considered a bit of a hero. Definitely not my usual mode of being, to be sure!

By the time the celebration had ended, Iolaus was up and around, looking not too much worse for the experience. As I had expected, I had no further opportunities to be alone with him, even if he hadn't been still recuperating from his wound. Hercules rarely let him out of his sight, although I doubt anyone other than me would have noticed it. I was beginning to feel decidedly sorry for the demi-God, having someone he might well have loved so close by all the time, but not being able to do anything about it, knowing full well that this Iolaus loved someone else.

It wasn't until the two of them were actually in the process of leaving that I got a moment to talk to Iolaus alone. I had stayed a little apart from the mob of well-wishers come to make their farewells. I was prepared to simply watch from a distance, thinking it would be easier that way, but Iolaus had a different idea. Separating himself from the crowd around Hercules, he came over to where I was standing.

"You saved my life," he began. With a rather uncertain quirk of his lips, he held out his hand. 

I took the offered hand, then pulled him into a hug.

"Whoever, or whatever, you love in the future," I said to him, "and whether or not we ever get together again, I'll always be your friend. You got that?"

"Uh-huh." He could have let go of me then and turned to leave, but he didn't. He just kept holding on. "Euphonius?"

"What?"

"Thanks. For everything."

I swallowed the lump in my throat and forced myself to release him. "No problem."

He stepped back and began to turn away, then turned to me again.

"Oh, I almost forgot. I'm still wearing your ring." 

He started to pull the blue moonstone circlet off his finger. I covered his hands with my own, effectively stopping him. 

"Keep it. Please."

"I can't do that," he objected.

"Sure you can. Just promise me one thing."

"What?"

"When you wear it, think of me."

Iolaus nodded.

 

*"The Song of the Grape" is a paraphrase of parts of Thomas Hood's poem, "The Song of the Shirt"


	5. DEAD BUGS IN AMBER

DEAD BUGS IN AMBER

 

"I'll give you thirty dinars for the lot, but only if you throw this one in with it too."

Casually, I picked up the amber necklace and tossed it on the pile of cheap jewelry I had already accumulated in front of me on the display table. The value of that last item was easily three times what I was offering for the entire lot, but I was gambling on the ignorance of the other man. Most of the people who come to these festivals to sell odds and ends don't have a very good idea of what their merchandise is worth. They're casual sellers of junk, not real merchants such as myself.

"What do you say? Is it a deal?"

He took the necklace in his hand and held it up to the light. "Well, I dunno. Seems like this ought to be worth a bit more. It's a pretty color."

It was indeed: dark red amber is far more rare than the usual brown variety. I took back the necklace, pretending to inspect it closely. I pointed at the large flat piece that was the pendant on the string of small beads. It wasn't nearly so red as the beads, and I wanted to draw his attention away from the color. "Looks like there's a couple of insects embedded in this chunk," I said distastefully.

"Yeah," he concurred. "But I still think it's worth more --"

"Come on, there's a frigging bug stuck in it! Who's going to buy that?"

"Why do you want it, then?"

Oops! Perhaps I'd overdone it. He was getting suspicious.

"Maybe I like insects," I replied with a casual shrug. "I'm offering thirty dinars for the lot. Do you want the money, or the bugs?"

He was still making up his mind when a hand reached over and took the necklace out of my grasp. There was a familiar moonstone ring on the little finger of that hand, a ring I had given to its present owner not all that long ago. 

When I turned to face Iolaus, I almost called out his name in greeting, but I was warned into silence by a slight shake of his head. He was still looking at the amber. "You're right. There are bugs in there." He held it up in front of his eyes, studying it closely. "This one looks like some kind of a mosquito, actually. Yuck!" Making a face, he dropped the necklace back onto my pile.

"It's a deal," the seller said quickly, doubtless convinced by that final demonstration of distaste. "Thirty dinars."

As I counted out the money, Iolaus sorted through the rest of my newly-acquired goodies, pretending to nothing but a casual curiosity. When I went to scoop them into my pouch, he plucked a small silver bracelet from the pile. "I'll give you one dinar for this," he offered, still not acknowledging that we knew each other.

"One dinar? It's worth three, at least," I replied, playing along.

"Come on. If my wife says she wants it, I'll go up to two dinars. She's around the corner at the butcher's stall." 

I followed him away from the table, still haggling over the price. As soon as we were out of sight, we both burst out laughing as we hugged each other in cheerful greeting.

"Okay, Euphonius," he finally managed to say. "Just how much is that necklace really worth?"

"Oh, I know a rich lady who likes amber, especially if it has yucky bugs in it. I figure I can sell it to her for between 80 and 90 dinars," I replied casually. "Thanks for helping me clinch the sale."

"Hey, what are friends for?"

"Well, right now, they're for buying each other a drink." I pointed to the Twin Serpents Tavern, just across the street. "What do you say?"

"Sounds good to me. Wait a moment, though." He stood up on his toes, searching the marketplace for something or someone. Then he waved. I looked in the direction of that wave and saw Hercules in the midst of a bevy of admiring young women, looking decidedly uncomfortable. When Iolaus caught the demi-God's eye, he pointed to the tavern and mimicked drinking. The other man nodded his understanding and waved back.

"Okay, let's go."

"What's up with Hercules and the girls? Isn't he coming with us?"

"Nah. They're after him to go judge the baking contest. He hates judging things, but he's not real good at refusing either."

Fine with me. I preferred having Iolaus all to myself anyway. He'd changed a lot since I'd run into him a good number of months ago. (Well, this version of him, at any rate. I had known his original namesake briefly and still mourned his death.) Back then, this Iolaus had been a rather timid little fellow from some other strange version of the world. Now, he'd gained a considerable amount of self-confidence, for one thing. And he smiled a heck of a lot more, for another. Yeah, the smile was sometimes rather brittle, as if it were in danger of collapsing at a moment's notice, but it was there.

We sat down at a corner table and waved to the bartender for drinks. I emptied my pouch of newly-acquired baubles on the table and began sorting gleefully through the merchandise. I knew this tavern well, and knew it was a safe place, so I didn't have to worry about thieves or anything like that. I also knew the Twin Serpents was mostly frequented by men who shared my preferences. (If I tell you the serving wenches weren't really women, and the pretty young things you could pay to warm your bed were handsome boys, would that give you a hint as to what I mean? I thought so.) At any rate, I was quite at home here.

"Did you really want that silver bracelet?" I asked Iolaus. Gods forbid that "wife" he had referred to earlier should be for real! Bad enough he was enamoured of a mermaid, or had been, last I'd heard. At least he couldn't have his sea-bound lady love, and so might occasionally settle for –- uh –- something else?

"No. I made that up on the spur of the moment," he answered.

I took a swallow of the ale that had just been served in order to hide my relief at his words, then went back to sorting through my pile of jewelry. The amber necklace truly was the only item of any great value, although a few of the bracelets were fairly nice. I held it up to the light, smiling.

"There's an old legend," I began, staring at the honey-brown pendant in satisfaction, "that says amber is formed when the rays of a brilliantly setting sun congeal in an evening sea, and then are cast ashore. The occasional odd bugs and stuff are just things that happened to get in the way as the light and water came together. I don't believe it for an instant, but it sounds nice, doesn't it?”

I glanced over at my companion as I hung the string of amber around my own neck, tucking it under the collar of my tunic and shirt for safe-keeping. We were sitting sideways-on to each other, rather than across the table. Iolaus seemed to be staring at me rather strangely, a frown creasing the space between his eyebrows. Not the response I had expected to my little tale about the formation of amber.

"What?" I asked, turning to face him more directly.

He shook his head, as if to drive some unwelcome thought away. "You don't want to know," he said at last, raising his mug to his lips and drinking more than was likely to be usual, for him.

Pushing aside my pile of baubles, I placed my hand over his other hand where it rested on the table. "I do want to know. What's wrong?"

"I -- uh -- I think I met your double in my world. I didn't recognize it until now, when I saw all this --" He gestured at the jewelry with the hand that held the mug -- " and saw you in profile. He had a nasty scar across one side of his face and wore his hair very short, so he didn't look quite like you from the front, and he went by a nickname that slips my mind just now, but he had this –- thing -- for jewels."

"Oh, was he a jewelry dealer also?" I asked lightly. I still didn't like the look on his face.

My question was greeted by a short and unfunny laugh. "More like the leader of a band of thieves and cutthroats. He paid for his purchases with blood and death, not dinars."

Iolaus tried to pull his hand out of mine, but I held on tighter. I had a bad feeling about this doppelganger of mine.

"How'd you run into someone like that?" I asked, after my companion had had a chance to take another generous swallow of his ale.

He closed his eyes and shook his head.

"Come on," I encouraged. "I want to know what I was in your world. You can tell me."

He looked at me for a long moment, then pressed his lips together and nodded. "He had to sell his ill-gotten gains to someone, and that someone was the Sovereign. Since he was very careful to restrict his predations to the surrounding kingdoms, he was always welcome at the Sovereign's court."

"So how well did you know this –- uh –- other me?"

"Not well at all, and better than I'd have liked," Iolaus admitted unhappily.

Uh-oh, I had a pretty good idea of what that could mean. I'd used that line myself, on occasion.

"Would you care to elaborate?"

"Not really, but I will. The Sovereign had a habit of offering me as a plaything to those of his guests who were inclined in that direction." His gaze drifted off into the distance, and his voice went very soft, as if he were remembering something all too clearly. "As I said, your other self had this thing for jewelry. Wore a lot of it himself, and he used to make me wear it whenever he --"

I put a finger on his lips, stopping the words. Then I turned him to face me again. "Don't. I get the picture."

Indeed, I got the picture all too well. One of my earliest experiences with men had involved a sea captain who liked gemstones and suchlike other pretty things. In fact, that was where I had gotten started in my current line of work, which had proven quite profitable to me, over the years. I could think of some rather good uses for jewelry in a sexual encounter myself. A lot of things would look really nice on Iolaus. And there were other ways to use them too, if we were --

No, don't even go there. I didn't need to be thinking like this. Not now. And I knew I'd never suggest such a thing to my gorgeous companion, even if the occasion arose, not after he'd told me about my double.

I gathered up the jewelry on the table rather hastily and dumped it back into its pouch.

"I'm –- uh –- sorry."

"Not your fault." He shrugged, drained his mug, and smiled at me. "As far as I'm concerned, your other self was just one in a long list of brutal, vicious creeps. That's all over now, thanks to Hercules' getting me out of there."

I signaled the bartender for refills, even though I'd barely touched mine. (No, I swear I wasn't trying to get Iolaus drunk so I could take advantage of him. Really. I just thought maybe he needed to chill out a little, that's all.)

"So tell me what's been going on with you? What brings you to Sparta? Are you just here for the festival, or on some mission with the big guy?" I asked, hoping to change the subject to something a bit more cheerful.

He took another long swallow from his brimming tankard, and giggled. By now, his eyes were looking a bit unfocussed. Not surprising. The ale here at the Twin Serpents has a pretty high alcohol content.

"Wanna hear about my latest adventure with Hercules?" he asked.

"Uh –- yeah." As long as it doesn't involve you and him in bed together, I thought to myself. But that really wasn't fair. To the best of my knowledge, Hercules and this Iolaus had never gotten it on, although I had reason to suspect that the demi-God wouldn't have been averse to such a thing. "Tell me about it."

Thus encouraged, Iolaus regaled me with a long story about a cursed Cyclops' eye, and people gradually fading out of sight, and a Goddess by the unflattering name of Discord. By the time he got to the part about Hercules and Ares having it out in a quarry, he had almost finished the rest of his ale and was becoming uncharacteristically enthusiastic and ungrammatical in telling his story. More to the point, he had one hand under the table and was gradually sliding it up the inside of my thigh.

Gods, I thought, he's either totally soused, or pretty damn horny! Either way, it was fine with me. I was enjoying the tale immensely, not to mention the rest of the action.

"So, in a moment of sudden inspiration, I tossed the Cyclops' eye to Ares," he concluded, fighting off another fit of laughter. "And the big dummy threw it at Hercules, even though Hercules warned him not to! It shattered, the energy bounced around the walls of the quarry, then headed straight for the God of War. Poof! He disappeared from sight!"

By now, he had surrendered to the giggles. "You should have seen the look on Ares' face just before he blinked out! It was hilarious!"

"I didn't think it was so funny," a dangerously deep voice interrupted. 

Iolaus and I both glanced up at this, only to find a big dude in black leather standing next to us. Iolaus' mouth dropped open and he just stared. The big dude leaned over and placed both hands flat on the table.

"In fact," he went on, far too quietly, "it was a major hassle getting rid of that invisible business. If I weren't a God, it may well have proven fatal." 

The big dude scowled blackly. I shivered, and not only from fear. The guy was absolutely drop-dead gorgeous, with this really neat moustache and beard. And he was just the tall, dark, and dangerous-looking type that appealed to me. He might have stepped right out of one of my more vicious fantasies.

However, he seemed to be focused on my drinking companion, who looked rather more as if the vision in black leather had come from one of his nightmares, rather than his dreams. 

As far as I'm concerned, no one messes with Iolaus. I stood up and demanded of the big stranger, "Who the fuck are you?"

He looked down at me scornfully. (Did I mention I'm not very tall? Only about Iolaus' height, to be exact.) 

"I'm Ares, pretty boy. Who the fuck are you?

Now, it's been many years since I've been a pretty boy, but there are those who consider me kind of cute, for an old dude. Not in Iolaus' class, of course, but not hard to look at either.

Then the rest of what he had said registered, not to mention the remark he'd made earlier.

"Ares?" I repeated skeptically. "As in Ares, God of War?"

"You got it."

I gave him a rather dubious glance. Yeah, he looked the part, but so would just about any nice-looking guy with bulging muscles wearing black leather. In point of fact, he was almost too nice-looking, despite the fierce expression on his face. Since I normally have very little to do with the inhabitants of Mount Olympus, it didn't at first occur to me that this was a really, truly God. I thought he might be somebody who enjoyed pretending to be the God of War, especially considering the usual clientele of the Twin Serpents Tavern.

The supposed God grabbed Iolaus by the neck and lifted him not only up from his seat but a good distance off the floor to boot. "You are coming with me."

Now, I didn't care if this fucker thought he was a God or just a truly irresistible stud. No one was going to do that to Iolaus, and especially not when he was here with me. If I get too angry, I tend to forget my less-than-average height, not to mention how generally useless I am in the personal combat department. I charged the big man, grabbing the arm that held my friend. At that same moment, I saw Ares gesture with his other hand and he and Iolaus both began to glow around the edges. But by then, I had collided with his other arm.

The world went bright and sparkly and then rapidly coalesced again –- someplace else.

Ares glared down at me. "What are you doing here?"

I let go of his arm and shrugged. I didn't even know where "here" was, much less what I was doing there. And I had the awful feeling this guy just might be exactly who and what he said he was.

He released his grip on Iolaus, who fell to the floor on his knees, trying to catch his breath.

"You okay?" I asked, as I helped him up.

He just nodded, still gasping for air and rubbing his bruised throat. I looked around, trying to make sense of our new surroundings. It looked rather like a small temple, deserted and a bit dusty just now, but obviously still in use, judging by the pile of gifts on the altar and the various fancy-looking weapons hung on every wall. Not a temple to Aphrodite, that was clear enough. 

Sunlight streamed into the otherwise rather dark room from a row of large windows along the side wall, and I could see a wide stretch of glittering water in the distance, as if the temple were up on a hill overlooking the sea. That being the case, we were clearly no longer anywhere near where we had been. You can't see the ocean from Sparta.

"Like it?" Ares asked, noticing the way I was sizing up the accommodations. "It's one of my more remote temples. My meddling half-brother will have to go some to find us here."

Iolaus had managed to recover himself by now. "What do you want?" he demanded, rather bravely, I thought, considering who it was that he was talking to. Or maybe he was still pretty drunk and didn't realize what was going on quite yet.

The God of War –- yes, I had admitted his identity by now, much as I didn't want to –- swaggered over and stood looking down at us, his lush lips parted slightly and his face set in a thoughtful expression. "I haven't decided yet. But don't worry -- it won't be anything nice," he assured Iolaus. Then his eyes focused on me. "Just who are you, anyway?" he asked. "And no smart answers this time. Got it?"

"Yeah. Got it. Uh –- my name's Euphonius. I'm a jewelry merchant," I said, trying to sound innocent and harmless.

Ares jerked his thumb at Iolaus, whose arm I was still holding. "So what were you doing with him?"

I almost replied, "Whatever he wanted to do with me," but thought better of it. This was clearly not the time to open my big mouth. "He's a friend," I said simply.

Leather Boy looked me up and down, then smirked. "Yeah, right."

Okay, so I'm not terribly macho in appearance, I usually wear too much jewelry, and I'm kind of prissy. That still didn't give him the right to sneer at me like that. 

I frowned. He frowned even more menacingly. I quickly concluded that discretion was the better part of valor, especially since I'm not too well-endowed in the valor department anyway. I readjusted my face into an innocuous smile and let my eyes roam around the temple. "Nice place you've got here."

"I like it. I come here when I want to -- you know, get away from it all. Quiet, secluded, and my followers know better than to interrupt me when the doors are closed." He grabbed Iolaus away from me and held him in front of him, one hand clutching either shoulder of the red-brown sleeveless top as he looked the smaller man up and down. "So, Jester, you're looking more presentable these days. Much better than the first time we met." He pursed his full lips than shook his head slightly. "Really didn't like the hat and the pointy shoes, if you know what I mean."

Iolaus just stood there staring down at the ground.

"You almost look as if you might eventually turn into a man, instead of a spineless coward," Ares went on. "I'd guess my do-gooder of a half-brother might have had something to do with that, eh? Well, maybe I liked you better the way you were. And maybe I can do something about turning you back into a wimp."

He gave Iolaus a rough shake. "What do you say to that, pal? I daresay my brother would be rather displeased at such an outcome, wouldn't he?"

Iolaus finally reacted. He reached up and took hold of the leather-covered forearms that held his shoulders as he said softly but firmly, "You can do whatever you want to my body. What you can't do is get at my soul. No one can get to me like that anymore. No one."

"Oh, you really think so, little man? I'm a God. I can do things that even your beloved Sovereign couldn't do."

"I don't care if you're Zeus himself, and I don't care what you do. It doesn't matter."

Ares laughed scornfully. "We'll just see about that."

Much to my surprise, the War God released Iolaus, but grabbed one hand and held it up before his eyes, examining the moonstone ring on my friend's little finger. "Since when have you started wearing jewelry?"

"I gave it to him," I said, before Iolaus could answer.

"Oh, you did, did you?" The dark gaze turned to me and I could see him weighing something behind those eyes. "Well, maybe you'd like to help me out here, Euphorius."

"Uh –- that's Euphonius," I corrected him carefully.

He laughed again. "Euphonius, then. Yes, indeed. I think you'll do nicely for what I have in mind."

"And what exactly do you have in mind?" I tried to keep my tone light, as if it didn't matter, but the truth was I was having a hard time pretending to be calm. Not only was I just about scared shitless, I was also too damned aroused by the sight of this gorgeous hunk in his tight leather outfit. Torn between terror and lust, it was devilishly difficult to carry on a casual conversation.

He smiled. I'd have sworn he knew what was running through my mind. "Oh, I'll think of something good, don't worry."

He turned his attention back to Iolaus. With a negligent gesture toward the far wall, he said, "You. Over there. Lose the clothes."

In the blink of an eye, Iolaus was spread-eagled literally in the first window in that wall, stark naked, wrists and ankles bound by leather straps. Behind him, the sunlight played on the waves, forming a brilliant backdrop to his body. The expression on his face went, in quick succession, from surprised, to alarmed, to grimly angry.

If he'd been posing like that willingly, it would have been a gorgeous sight. As it was, the revulsion on his face rather marred the erotic image he presented. Beams of light touched his pale hair and danced gaily on the inside ceiling of the temple, reflected from the ever-moving waves of the sea.

"Nice," Ares remarked, inspecting his artistic creation casually. Then his dark eyes turned to me. "But we're going to make it nicer, aren't we?" He put one large hand on my shoulder and led me up the few steps to the altar.

In the center was a large gold platter filled with coins and a tangled heap of various kinds of jewelry. 

"This is where my followers place their more delicate offerings," the God said. "Perhaps you have something you'd like to contribute?"

Eager to please, I snatched the pouch off my belt and dumped my cache of recently-acquired goodies into the plate.

"Excellent. Now --" He waved his hand negligently over the platter and its load of riches –- "I figure you as a man who knows fine jewelry and how to use it to its best advantage. Is that true, merchant?"

I nodded quickly.

"Good. I want you to sort through all this junk, pick out the best pieces, and dress up our little friend in the window. You understand me?"

"Uh –- yeah," I managed to reply.

This wasn't good at all. Could Ares possibly have overheard our conversation earlier, when Iolaus had talked about my alter ego in his world? Or was he just pulling all this out of his own perverted imagination? I didn't know, and I didn't ask.

I spilled the plate out onto the altar, desperately trying to think of something to do to stop this. I truly wasn't all that worried about what Ares would do to Iolaus' body, since I figured he couldn't do anything the Sovereign hadn't already done. It was his mind I was worried about.

Meanwhile, the dark God sauntered over to a very fancy chair, almost a throne, set a little back from the altar and sprawled across it, one leg hooked over the arm. "Get on with it, merchant," he ordered, waving impatiently towards Iolaus.

I picked up a delicate gold circlet set with glittering diamonds. It was sort of a small crown, and had probably been a lady's hair ornament. Ares had said use the good stuff, and this was clearly the richest piece in the platter.

I walked over to Iolaus, trying to keep my eyes on his face rather than the rest of his naked body, which was not an easy feat, believe me!

Watching me approach, he had this very awful look on his face, as if he'd just seen a ghost. As I placed the circlet on his head and arranged his hair artfully around it, he said very softly, "What Ares called you? That was your name, in my world. I just remembered."

"What?" I kept my voice low also, not wanting Ares to hear us.

"Merchant. You –- I mean, he –- called himself the Merchant."

Oh, shit! We did not need this. I could hear the horror in the shakiness of his voice.

"Iolaus, listen to me. I'm not him. And you're not the Jester anymore. Don't think about that. Stay here. Now. This is not going to be fun, but you can do it. You hear me?"

"Yeah." But he didn't sound convinced, not by any means.

"It'll be all right. Let Ares play all the games he wants. The more time it takes, the more time that gives Hercules to track you down. He will, you know. Just hang in there, okay?"

The smile that twisted his lips was pretty sick, but it was a smile. Glancing pointedly at the straps that held him suspended in the window frame, he said, "I don't seem to have a lot of choice except to hang in here, do I?"

"That's the spirit. I'll be back with something else. I intend to drag this out for as long as I can, okay?"

He nodded.

Gods, but he looked pretty with those diamonds in his hair! I tried very hard not to think about that.

The next thing I came up with was a pair of gold armbands. They were made to look like loosely-coiled serpents, nicely detailed and with good-sized rubies for eyes. I thought they looked about the right size to fit Iolaus' upper arms, and they had hinges, so could be put on despite the straps that bound his wrists.

I was right. They fit perfectly, serving to draw attention to his nice but not excessively over-developed biceps.

But my poor friend didn't seem too pleased with his latest ornaments. "I don't like this," he whispered. "It –- reminds me too much --"

I stepped in closer, pretending to adjust the position of the crown, which had slipped slightly. "Shh. I know what it reminds you of. But if we don't play his game, Ares might get mad and really hurt us."

"You call this a game?"

"Yeah, I do. I've seen it before. In fact, I've played it myself," I replied, trying to sound calm and sure of myself. "I've also seen real torture and rape. This is something else. I don't think Ares means to actually maim or kill us, as long as we play along with him."

"I'm not so sure about that."

"You can never be entirely certain, unless you know your partner a whole lot better than I know Ares. But I don't think serious damage is what he has in mind. I do think he's going to play games with your head, so be aware of that, huh?"

"Oh, I'm already very aware of that, don't worry."

"Good. Now let me go see what else I can find in the way of jewelry."

After that, I came up with a few more items, taking my sweet time with each one. It was mostly rather innocuous stuff, like a gold choker set with chrysolite, and a couple of anklets and bracelets, that sort of thing. Iolaus made no further objection as I continued to decorate him.

Then I picked up a woven gold chain necklace, with a carved pendant made of jet. The pendant was large, but jet isn't very heavy. It's easily worked and polishes well. This was an exceptionally fine piece, made to look like the snarling head of a black panther, with a fire opal set in its mouth.

Opals, like many other gemstones, are said to bring good fortune, and I figured we could use some of that in our present predicament. Of course, it also occurred to me that opals, while beautiful, are easily cracked and discolored. They are delicate and fragile gems, perhaps just a little too similar to Iolaus' state of mind just now.

As I started over to the window with my latest acquisition, Ares interrupted my progress by growling at me, "Come on, merchant. Are you going to take all day? Couldn't you just pick out everything you want at once and get this done?"

"Hey, I've got to step back and consider the overall effect as I do it," I objected. "What's the rush? You're enjoying the show, aren't you?"

The God of War only scowled. 

Now, as I've already said, I was pretty sure I could handle this scene. What I wasn't so sure of was whether Iolaus could, despite his brave words to Ares earlier. While it's not my usual style, I'd learned this game a very long time ago, but with a difference: once I'd gotten used to it, I had been a willing participant. Iolaus had not, and he'd been systematically abused against his will for most of his life. Forcing him to relive that experience could just be enough to push him over the edge of his sanity, which had to be somewhat precarious to begin with, considering all the things he'd been through.

I'm just telling you this so you'll realize I wasn't being all that brave or anything when I did what I did next. I was only trying to get the God of War to focus on me because I was seriously afraid of the damage he could do to Iolaus, if he tried. I've seen how a person can go weird if a situation reaches the point where the mind can't handle it anymore.

Making a show of wiping the perspiration from my forehead, I untied the sash around my waist and went on to remove my knee-length outer tunic, which left me in just my light shirt and trousers. I tossed the tunic negligently over into a corner, resumed my interrupted progress towards Iolaus, and fastened the chain with its panther pendant around his neck. He looked at me strangely, frown lines appearing between his eyebrows, but said nothing.

I went back to the altar, again searching through the jewelry, even though I knew full well what I intended to use next. There was a belt made of shining links of gold, the ornate clasp set with numerous red stones. They might have been rubies, but I thought it likelier they were garnets, judging by the color. Red garnets are a warrior's talisman, supposed to protect you from harm.

Before taking up the belt, however, I turned to Ares and looked at him, as if for permission. "It's hot in here." I began unlacing my shirt. "Do you mind?"

"Be my guest."

I pulled the shirt over my head and tossed it on top of the tunic. It truly was rather warm inside the temple, but not so hot that I needed to undress, and Ares couldn't help but realize that.

Picking up the gold belt, I made my way over to Iolaus yet again, watching the War God out of the corner of my eyes in order to see if he was watching me.

No, I wasn't fooling myself into thinking I was anywhere near as lovely as Iolaus. While people don't exactly run away screaming in horror at the sight of my naked body, neither do they usually run screaming with joy and desire towards it. Still, I'm passable, for a man my age. Ares was obviously noticing. Good.

I fastened the belt around Iolaus' waist. 

"Do you know what you're doing, coming on to him?" he hissed, clearly picking up on my intentions.

"Yes. Now keep quiet."

"But this isn't just some ordinary man. This is –-"

"Ares, God of War," I finished for him. "Yes, I know. But he's not much different than a dozen or so other big guys in leather that I've known at various times in my life. Trust me."

Okay, I was pretending to a confidence I didn't entirely feel. But I'd do whatever I had to, if it meant I could spare my friend some of what was to come. 

I went back to the altar, then turned to study my decorated creation in the window. 

By now, there wasn't too much more of Iolaus on which I could possibly hang something. Except, of course, . . . 

After much deliberation, I picked out a very long string of pearls and unfastened the clasp.

"Euphonius, enough already," Iolaus protested when he saw me coming towards him.

I tucked one end of the necklace securely into the belt around his waist before I answered. "The longer I can string this out –- and you should pardon the pun –- the more time that gives Hercules to come after us. I told you that before. Now be quiet."

Before he had a chance to protest further, I had wrapped the pearls around his cock and balls, bringing the loose end up the front of his body and tucking it into the gold belt. 

When I turned to go back to the altar to see if I could come up with anything else, I found myself face to face with the God of War.

He studied Iolaus for a moment, then nodded. "I like it, merchant. You've made him look much more –- interesting."

I looked back over my shoulder at the man framed in the window. Oh, yeah. I had to agree with Ares. Now, if only I had been free to enjoy it. Although the whole scene was a turn-on for me, I knew it wasn't for Iolaus. Or at least, if it was, he didn't truly want it to be.

When I turned back, Ares was looking down at me. Reaching out a hand, he fingered the smooth beads of the necklace I was wearing. "What's this stuff?"

"Amber." Okay, I'd gotten his attention on me instead of Iolaus. Now I needed to keep it there. "If you look close at the pendant, you can see a couple of bugs."

"You're kidding, right?"

"No, really. Amber is nothing but real old tree sap. Sometimes stuff gets stuck in it before it hardens."

He pulled the pendant, and me along with it, closer to his face and squinted at it. "You mean these little specks?"

"Yeah." I put my hand over his, angling the flat oval bead so that the light illuminated it to better advantage. "See?"

He saw. But he also saw our heads together, and my face almost touching his. I smiled invitingly.

"Are you coming on to me, merchant?" the dark God demanded.

"Maybe. Interested?"

He twisted his hand so the string of beads was wrapped tightly around it, then used the necklace like a leash to pull me forward onto my toes and close up against his body. I could feel his hard cock through the leather pants. Of course, that meant he could easily enough feel my own erection also.

"What do you think?" he said, smiling cruelly. He twisted the beads, so the necklace dug into my neck, threatening to cut off my breath, but not quite doing so. "I think you're enjoying this too, aren't you?"

I nodded, agreeing with the all too obvious truth. 

Ares laughed and pulled harder on the necklace. The string broke, and the beads scattered across the stone floor with a sound like falling water. 

"Aww, I broke your pretty little bauble," he taunted. Then he grabbed me with his free hand and pulled me over to the altar. Setting down the amber pendant which had been clenched in his palm, he looked through the various offerings, quickly settling on a gold and turquoise necklace. It had a round centerpiece, with dangling fringes of alternating delicate gold chain and small turquoise stones set in hinged strings.

"Maybe you'd like to have this to replace it, merchant?"

"Do I have a choice?" I didn't want him to think I was being too cooperative.

"No," he replied, fastening the clasp behind my neck. Taking hold of the necklace by the round center, he let the metal fringes trail across my chest, running them over each nipple in turn and watching my reaction. "You want this too, don't you?"

I licked my lips and nodded.

A very nasty look came over his face. "Or are you just trying to keep me away from your friend? Hmm?" He inclined his head forward and looked at me from under lowered eyebrows as he demanded, "Which is it?"

I stared into the narrowed eyes not a hands breadth from my own and answered truthfully, "Both." With a boldness I really didn't feel, I stepped forward so my leg was between his and rubbed my hard cock against his leather-clad groin. "Does it matter?"

His eyes widened a fraction as he reacted, but he still didn't look convinced. "Don't play games with me, merchant. Or I'll make you very, very sorry. You and your friend both." His face changed and his eyebrows drew even lower, as if he'd just thought of something distasteful. "Or maybe he's more than a friend? Have you two been getting it on?" he demanded. "Does my dear brother know you're screwing his little clown?"

"Yes –- yes -- and I don't think so," I answered each question in turn. "What's the matter? Jealous?"

That was a mistake. At one small gesture of his hand, I found myself flying through the air. I barely had time to realize I'd miscalculated Ares' limits before I smashed into the far wall, then slid down to land hard on the floor. For a moment I just lay there, dazed and hurting.

With a satisfied nod in my direction, the God of War strode over to Iolaus. He ran the back of his hand down the side of the other man's face.

Iolaus jerked his head away from Ares' touch. "Fuck off," he said defiantly.

Ares laughed, grabbed a handful of the blond hair, and pulled his victim's head back. "Oh, we've added some nasty language to our vocabulary lately, have we?" he said mockingly. "You don't sound quite so willing as your buddy over across the room."

"I'm not."

"Good. I prefer it that way." He forced a brutal kiss on the bound man.

My bruised brain was beginning to think again. I managed to get to my knees, but only by leaning against the wall.

Iolaus must not have responded to the kiss, since Ares broke it off and backhanded him across the face. "Come on, Jester. You can do better than that. Word has it that you've had a lot of practice with the Sovereign, so you can't mind it all that much."

Twisting his head to wipe the blood from his split lip against his shoulder, Iolaus replied disdainfully, "That was before I knew anything about friendship and caring. Now I do, thanks to Hercules and a few other people." He spit the rest of the blood in his mouth at Ares' feet, then looked at the War God with black hatred in his eyes. "Go on, rape me. It doesn't matter. You can take anything you want by force, except for anything that's worth having, like respect and love."

Ares laughed. "Pretty speech, little man. But respect isn't what I'm after. And love? Oh, puh-leeze!"

He strode over to the altar, picked up my amber pendant, and held it in front of Iolaus' face. "Brave words from a pathetic fool. You know what you remind me of, Jester? You're like one of these little bugs, trapped by your past, and trapped for all time. You're a coward and a victim, and that's all you'll ever be."

By now I was thinking fairly clearly, although I still felt rather dizzy, not to mention sore all down my back, where I had gotten too well acquainted with the stone wall. But I couldn't just stand by and let Ares use my own jewelry against my friend.

"No," I objected, rather more weakly than I would have wanted. "Don't listen to him, Iolaus. The bugs are dead. You're alive, and you've still got possibilities. You don't have to be trapped, if you don't want to be."

Ares' black glare focused in my direction. "I think you'd better keep out of this now, merchant. Unless you want to make me very angry. And you wouldn't like that."

Okay, let's see if I can scrape together enough dignity and courage to play my next card.

"Don't make me laugh, Ares. I've seen the face of Ultimate Darkness, and, next to Dahok, you're a pussycat."

He was clearly taken aback by my taunt. I'd swear his complexion went a shade paler as he strode over, grabbed my upper arms, and pulled me roughly to my feet. "Dahok? What do you know of Dahok?"

"I know you were way out of your league when you got mixed up with him," I said with a twisted smile. "What's the matter? Is the big bad God of War actually afraid of something? That would be amusing."

"Shut up!"

"Make me."

Very slowly, a strange smile crossed his face. "I'm beginning to like you, merchant."

"Well, I don't like you," I replied.

"Maybe not, but you want me anyway, don't you? We've already established that. Okay. But just one little thing. No more about Dahok --" Letting go of my arms, he held out his palm, which filled with sparkling fire, then made a sort of a throwing gesture at Iolaus. 

Iolaus screamed once, when the energy bolt first hit him, then convulsed in silence.

"— or your friend over there suffers for it," Ares finished. "Got it?"

"Got it," I replied, licking suddenly dry lips.

He stalked across the room to Iolaus. He snapped his fingers and the leather straps disappeared so suddenly that the smaller man would have slumped to the floor in surprise, if Ares hadn't caught hold of one arm and held him on his feet. He dragged his captive over to the altar, then swept everything else off with his free hand. 

Releasing his hold on Iolaus' arm, the War God stared down at him with a smile, as he casually bounced another fireball on his palm and ordered, "Climb up there and lie down on your back, or your friend gets fried."

I stopped breathing, wondering just how far Iolaus was willing to carry his defiance and whether or not I was going to suffer for it.

Apparently he wasn't prepared to carry it quite that far, much to my relief. After a moment's hesitation, he did as he was told.

Ares disappeared the fireball and walked around the altar slowly, gloating over his unwilling sacrifice. 

Now, I know enough to realize that sex can mean everything –- or it can mean nothing at all. To me, with Iolaus, it meant everything. But right now, for him, it would be far better if it meant nothing at all. But I didn't know any way to make that happen. All I could do was stand there and look helpless.

Then the God of War smiled in my direction and gestured. "Come over here, merchant."

I did, still fighting off a residue of dizziness. 

"Pretty, huh?" Ares asked. 

It was obvious that he didn't mean me. I nodded. 

We were standing sideways-on to the altar. Iolaus just lay there, his arms by his sides, his legs together, and his eyes closed. His pearl-wrapped prick showed no trace of arousal, a fact which could surely not have escaped Ares' attention.

I'm afraid I couldn't say the same for myself. The pretty body that I had always desired, the jewelry, and even –- may the Gods forgive me! -- the fact that Iolaus was clearly furious and did not want this to happen, all combined to make me want him more.

"What's the matter, merchant? Nothing to say?"

I shook my head, not really trusting my voice.

Ares pulled me backwards against the front of his body. One hand reached around to grab my genitals through the thin fabric of my pants, as he said into my ear, "You want first crack at him? I just might let you, if you ask nicely."

Oh, Gods, he would offer me that! In my all too few sexual encounters with this Iolaus, I'd always treated him very gently, since he had told me of his history with the Sovereign and I didn't want to freak him out. But that doesn't mean I wasn't capable of doing otherwise. There's a very fine line separating erotic games from rape and abuse. The whole crux of the matter is consent. If you're a willing participant, it's not evil. If you don't, even a relatively innocent action can be wrong.

This would be very wrong indeed.

I shook my head again. No matter that my knees were shaking with desire and that I wanted nothing more than to beg for the privilege of screwing Iolaus, even now, even here, with Ares watching and probably laughing at us. But I knew if I did that, Iolaus would hate me for it later on. And his hatred was the one thing I most emphatically didn't want far far more than I would ever want his body.

"No, huh? Tsk tsk tsk. You disappoint me, merchant." 

So saying, the War God let me go and turned his attention to Iolaus, who still had his eyes tightly shut and hadn't moved a muscle. Pulling off the wide black leather belt around his waist so that his vest fell open and the impressive bulge in his pants was quite visible, Ares placed his hands on his hips and cocked his pelvis forward. 

He clearly knew how to wield that gorgeous body like a weapon. All he did was stand there in silence, looking down at Iolaus, whose head was almost on the same level as his groin.

Unable to withstand the continued silence and his own curiosity, Iolaus finally opened his eyes to see what was going on. 

Ares laughed. "Oh, good. At last I've gotten your attention."

Iolaus turned his head away. "Am I supposed to be impressed?" he said coldly.

From the look on Ares' face, I suddenly feared for my friend's life. Rape is, after all, preferable to death. At least, in my estimation, it is. Maybe it was time for Iolaus to shut up and just let it happen. But there was no way I could tell him that. Not now.

Ares turned his anger into another mocking laugh, then said viciously, "You can knock off the act now, you stupid little twit! You're not a hero. You're nothing but Hercules' little pussy. Tell me, does my dear brother screw you as hard as I'm going to?"

"Hercules doesn't screw me at all," Iolaus retorted, a rather puzzled expression coming over his face.

Ares realized he'd missed his target with that shot, but he took aim and tried again, this time with much more accuracy. "You mean Mr. Nice Guy never came on to you?" He shook his head pityingly. "The original Iolaus was his lover. Everybody knows that. Guess you weren't even good enough for him to be interested in you, huh?"

It hurt me more to see the look on Iolaus' face when Ares said that to him than it did when the God had thrown me across the room. I opened my big mouth, even against my own better judgement. "That's not true! Hercules wants him. He just doesn't think Iolaus is interested, that's all, and he's too decent a guy to push him."

If Iolaus had looked puzzled before, he was downright surprised this time, which fact was not lost on Ares. I saw the dark glare become speculation as he turned to me.

"Oh, is that so? Mind telling me how you come to know so much about my dear brother's motivations? Are you going to claim there's something between you two also?"

I almost laughed at that. "Me and Hercules? Nah, I'm afraid not. I'm just taking an educated guess here." And that's all it was, truth to be told. But I was pretty sure I was right, since I'd seen the way the demi-God treated Iolaus, not to mention how he looked at him when the other man wasn't watching. I shrugged. "Hey, what do I know? I'm just the gem merchant, right?"

"Right," the dark God agreed. He opened his pants, freeing himself from the confines of the leather. To say this guy was well-endowed would have been an understatement. He grinned at me. "You have a big mouth and a smart tongue, merchant. Can you use it for anything other than talking?"

"Uh -– my mouth isn't that big," I had to admit.

Placing one heavy hand on my shoulder, he pushed me down on my knees in front of him. "Try," he said. "Get me ready."

"You already are," I pointed out from my new vantage point, staring head-on at the head of his impressive cock, which already protruded fully from the normal covering of its foreskin. 

"Do it anyway. I like it," he commanded.

Needing no further encouragement, I licked, nibbled, stroked, sucked, and just generally played around with that lovely cock enthusiastically. The only thing I didn't do was try to get the entire thing into my mouth. Despite what Ares had said earlier on, my big mouth is a verbal attribute, not a physical one. If I tried real hard, I could indeed get my lips around the head of his dick, but no way could I get him completely into my mouth without dislocating my jaw. 

At least that's what I thought, until he caught hold of my hair while I was making one of my better efforts and pulled my head tighter up against his groin. I choked, unable to breathe around the mass of flesh that was suddenly forced down my throat. Automatically, I tried to pull away, but that was useless. As I struggled to get some air into my lungs, the only thing that kept me from utter panic was the thought that he really wasn't out to kill me and would have to let me go soon. 

He did, but only to ram himself back again a moment later. As he continued, I did my best to suppress the urge to gag. My fear eased off somewhat and I found I could breathe in between thrusts. Sucking wasn't really a possibility, since it was all I could do just to keep my mouth open that wide. The hinges of my jaw ached from the effort, but I dared not relax. I didn't think he'd appreciate it much if I bit him, or scraped my teeth across the tender skin of his cock. Yeah, Ares enjoyed pain, but I had no reason to think he enjoyed feeling it, instead of causing it.

Beyond a certain point, a lot of something becomes too much. This stopped being erotic to me and became just plain exhausting. I began to wish he'd come, even though I knew I'd really be hard-pressed to breathe if he did. Getting bolder, or perhaps just more desperate, I reached up with one hand and touched his balls. When this action didn't result in being blasted with a fireball, I concluded he liked it and became more inventive with my fondling. 

By then I was deliberately trying to make him come. That would end my particular torment, gain us a little time, and perhaps keep his mind off Iolaus for a bit.

Of course, it didn't work. He seemed to have this sort of phenomenal control over his body. No mortal man would have lasted so long at that stage of arousal, and still been able to think about anything other than his own release, but Ares did.

All of a sudden, my mouth was empty and he'd pulled me back onto my feet with the hand that was still clenched in my hair. I just gasped and looked rather shocked at the change.

"Not bad, merchant," was all he said. If I could have made him stop calling me that without telling him why, I would have. I was beginning to really hate it, because I was also beginning to realize just how easily I could turn into something very like my alter ego.

Ares turned his attention back to Iolaus. "Turn over. And swing around sideways so your legs are on the floor."

Iolaus did as he was told.

"Now grab the other edge of the altar. Yeah, like that. Merchant, go around and hold his wrists."

"Are you kidding? I couldn't hold him down even if I wanted to. He's stronger than I am, in case you haven't noticed."

"Oh, I've noticed. But don't worry, he won't struggle. I'm betting the Sovereign trained him better than that. Besides, if he does, I'll hurt him. Or, better yet, I'll hurt you. Keep that in mind, Jester."

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I did as Ares had commanded, going to stand across the altar from him and resting my hands over Iolaus' wrists where he was gripping the narrow stone edge. I told myself I wasn't holding him down. I was only touching him in order to provide moral support.

By now, I was out of options. Except for one.

"Please, don't," I appealed to Ares, trying to sound totally pitiful. "Leave him alone."

Iolaus glared up at me and said harshly, "Don't beg, Euphonius. It won't do any good."

I shut up and bit my lip.

"Are you speaking from experience, Jester?" Ares asked mockingly.

"Yes, damn you!"

Ares ran one hand over the gold belt around his captive's waist, then slid it down to caress his ass. "You want this. Admit it."

"No, I don't," Iolaus insisted. 

He was still totally furious. Good. In such a situation, hatred isn't the worst emotion you can feel. Self-hatred is.

"I'll make you want it, before I'm done," Ares said smoothly. "Oh, we are so angry, aren't we? What's the matter? You don't like this anymore because you found a sweet little mermaid who makes you feel like a real man?" The God positioned himself between Iolaus' legs, pushing them farther apart. Taking hold of his cock, he pressed it against the exposed opening. "Do you honestly imagine you're man enough to love any woman, much less a mermaid? What a joke! But we can't really expect anything but jokes from a professional fool, now can we?"

Those last words brought a terrible look to Iolaus' face, even as he tried to turn his head down against the surface of the altar. I don't know how to describe it, except that it seemed as if he wanted to cry or scream, but could do neither. It was easy to see that last remark had hit home.

Satisfied, Ares thrust his hips forward, pushing into the other man in one quick uncaring movement.

Iolaus didn't so much as flinch when Ares penetrated him. Well, why should he? He was used to the Sovereign, and I doubt if the Sovereign had been any less brutal, or any less well-endowed.

But tears seeped around his tightly-closed eyelids, and I saw despair in the set of his lips.

Squatting down to bring my face level with Iolaus', I leaned forward and kissed the side of his head, whispering brokenly in his ear. "Nothing, my love. It means nothing. It proves nothing –- except that he has the power -- and we know that already. After all, he's a God. Don't believe anything he says. Don't give him the victory. This means nothing, nothing at all."

I couldn't tell if he even heard what I said, or if he was lost in his own inner torment of memory and sorrow.

It went on for what seemed an eternity. I was just beginning to wonder why Ares didn't come and get it over with, when I realized what he was trying to do.

The War God was playing this game on another level now. Easy enough it is to simply rape a man, if you have the physical advantage over him. Do that, and your victim is free to suffer the shame and pain, and then righteously hate you afterwards. But make him enjoy what you do, and give him the time to realize he's enjoying it, that's something else again. And make him enjoy it so much that he begs you to keep on fucking him, that's even worse.

My eyes were at a level low enough that I could see under the altar by squatting down just a little. As unobviously as possible, I looked to see if Iolaus showed any signs of being interested in what was going on.

Apparently, my poor friend knew that mind game as well as I did. All those years of being the unwilling plaything of the Sovereign may have taught him how it worked. Very possibly, he'd even learned how to resist it, and could at least try to deny his tormentor his desire, if not his body. Whether or not that was the reason, his cock seemed to be ignoring Ares' actions completely.

The dark God had seen the direction of my glance, unfortunately. 

"So you've noticed, have you, merchant?" he remarked, almost casually. Then, to Iolaus: "You really think I can't turn you on?"

"You can't make me want it," was the grim response.

"Think again, Jester." Ares reached around with one hand. He ran one finger along Iolaus' limp cock and it sprang to life. Iolaus gasped and almost came up off the altar, except that he was still pinned down by the other man's cock up his ass.

"No, no, no, no," he moaned.

"You see? You can't deny me. No one denies a God."

I took a wild guess here. "Iolaus, it isn't you. It's a God-thing. He can make your body react, if he wants to."

Ares narrowed his eyes at me. "And how would you know?"

"Because you didn't do anything when you touched him that should have affected him like that, under ordinary circumstances."

The War God didn't deny it. He just looked at me scornfully. "I don't have to do anything to you, merchant. You want me anyway." 

His accusation was all too true. My stiff cock strained against the fabric of my trousers. I couldn't even begin to suppress my own desire.

"And you want him too," Ares went on. "You'd like it to be your cock up his ass right now, wouldn't you? The offer's still good, merchant. You just have to wait for me to finish with him, that's all."

"No. I won't."

"You really think you have a choice in the matter? You were right before, about the God-thing. I don't even have to touch you." He focused his dark eyes on me and smiled. 

If it was possible for desire to increase geometrically, mine did, by a factor of at least ten. I sucked in my breath in surprise and frustration. Without fully realizing I was doing so, I released Iolaus' wrists and brought my hands down to my aching cock, wanting only to seek my own release.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Ares said, cold menace in his voice. "I can hurt him a whole lot more than I already have, if you make me angry."

I froze in mid-grope. "Ares, please!" I managed to say, my voice half-strangled in my throat.

"You want to do something with your hands?"

I nodded frantically.

"Fine. Then do your little friend here, while I finish this off."

That was definitely not what I had in mind, as it would only make things worse, as far as I was concerned. On the other hand, how much worse could it get? And I still retained enough sense to realize he had threatened Iolaus with real harm, if I displeased him.

Okay, so I let go of his wrists and crawled under the altar to see what I could do with various other parts of his body. The sooner this was over, the better.

The string of pearls was still looped around his genitals, and I was sure the two strands that ran up the front of his body to the belt had to be crushed painfully between the top of the altar and his pelvic bones, with all of Ares' weight pressed against him. Well, if nothing else, I could fix that. I had left sufficient slack that it was easy enough to unwrap the pearls and work them off of his cock. With a strength born of desperation, I snapped the string, then pulled both strings off to either side of his hips, timing my actions with the War God's thrusts.

That done, it didn't take very long for the combined ministrations of my fingers and tongue to bring him to climax. I did my best to be gentle, and to try to communicate my caring and love through my touch, but I don't know that it mattered much to him.

Ares reacted, or perhaps simply allowed himself to react at last, to the spasms of Iolaus' body as his seed spurted out and against my hands. The son of a bitch actually laughed when he came, pushing brutally hard into his victim for the last few strokes.

I cursed at him under my breath, even as I reached down to try to do something about my own desperate cock. But Ares wouldn't even allow me that. Growling "Get up here, merchant," he grabbed my hair and pulled me up next to him, where he still stood pressed tightly against Iolaus' ass.

"It's your turn," he said, as he withdrew his cock with tantalizing slowness.

I wanted nothing more than to take what was offered to me. By then, I'd have fucked a hydra, I was that desperate.

In the story of our lives, we are always the good guys, at least in our own minds. It might be better if we could admit that every now and then, we just might be able to be the bad guys. The Darkness never truly goes away. It's always there, waiting and biding its time.

And the thought of that Darkness, and the way Dahok had so cruelly and callously used me for his own ends not all that long ago, made me angry. But not as angry as the thought of what he'd done to that other Iolaus. I had rashly vowed vengeance on Dahok for that, and I had learned since then that the only vengeance I could ever take on that despicable entity was not to give in to darkness and evil, in whatever shape or form it presented itself to me.

Gathering the last shreds of my determination and dignity, I said, "No."

"Euphonius, I can handle it," Iolaus spoke up, much to my surprise. I had figured him to be a total wreck by now. "It doesn't matter if you fuck me too."

"It matters to me," was all the answer I could choke out.

"Aw, come on, merchant. Do it. Can't you see he wants you to?" Ares said, pulling me closer, so that I stood between Iolaus' spread legs.

I looked the War God straight in the face and said clearly, "When my cock falls off."

He laughed in that annoying way he has and said with a smile, "That can be arranged."

But it was a taunt, not a threat. I could tell that.

"But before your cock does fall off," he went on, "wouldn't you like it to spend a little more time up his ass?"

I shook my head, hands clenched tightly at my sides, if only to keep them from reaching out for Iolaus.

To this day, I don't know if I'd have been able to hold out much longer. I'd like to think I would, but I'll never be sure, because that's when Hercules chose to arrive on the scene. 

The doors of the temple flew open and crashed back against the wall, and the demi-God appeared in the doorway, looking like the very vision of Vengeance Incensed. 

"Ares, leave them alone!!" he bellowed.

Ares took a step backward, looking almost afraid when confronted by his brother's fierce anger. 

Hercules strode over to the altar, taking in the situation at a glance. But that glance held on Iolaus' naked, jewelry-adorned body for just a little too long, and I saw the demi-God's eyes widen and his lips part slightly. Oh yeah, he wanted him, just as he had wanted the other Iolaus. 

With an effort that I may have been the only one to notice, he pulled himself together.

"Let him go, Ares." His voice was calm now with suppressed fury.

By this time, the God of War had regained his cool. Making a show of tucking his cock back into his pants, he said, "You're too late, little brother. I've had him already."

"Damn you!! I'll --"

Iolaus pushed himself up from the altar, much to everyone's surprise, and interrupted the demi-God. "No, Hercules. It's not worth it. He didn't hurt me. Not really."

He stood facing the God of War, who towered over him as usual, but somehow didn't look quite as tall anymore. Although he wore nothing but jewelry and his own dignity, Iolaus managed to convey the definite impression that he was the one in control of the situation now.

He laughed in the big man's face. "Ares? I don't give a flying fuck what you did. It doesn't make any difference. As I said earlier, you can get anything you want that way -- except for anything that matters. You may have shoved your cock up my ass, but that only makes you the bigger asshole, not me."

Hercules just stared in disbelief, his mouth hanging open, but I couldn't stop myself; I laughed. 

The War God, however, was not amused. He turned on me. "You wanted it, didn't you, merchant? There could easily be a next time, you know. When your spoilsport friends aren't around?" He grinned knowingly. "Would you like that?"

"Maybe I would. You never know," I admitted. 

A cunning smile crossed his face. His dark eyes flickered down to my crotch, and my cock went blessedly limp. Then he turned away with a snort and began to sparkle around the edges. "

“Oh, and Ares?" I added, before he could disappear. "Watch out for those dead bugs. They may not be quite as dead as you think they are."

With a really nasty scowl in my direction, the God of War blinked out of view, as Iolaus and I shared a smile.

Hercules frowned in puzzlement. "Dead bugs?"

"You had to be there," I quipped.

"Oh. Okay," he said, still looking blank.

"I'm explain it to you later," Iolaus offered, now laughing himself at the expression on the big man's face. His laughter stopped as abruptly as it had begun. He looked down at his body, as if remembering his lack of clothing. Going to the window overlooking the sea, he started slowly divesting himself of the jewelry. Without saying a word, a piece at a time, he took it off, then tossed it far out the window.

Hercules just stood there staring at his friend's strange behavior. Then he started roaming around the temple, to all appearances as if he were searching for something.

I knew, as I was sure Iolaus also knew, the value of the gems he was discarding. It took all the self-control that I could muster not to go over and stop him, but I didn't. Fingering the turquoise and gold necklace still hanging around my neck, I wondered briefly if I should get rid of it also. Then common sense won out and I knew I wouldn't do that, despite the circumstances that had led to my acquiring it.

Walking over to the corner where I had earlier tossed my clothes, I pulled my shirt and tunic back on. After fastening my sash, I headed over to the window, where my naked friend had just tossed away the last of his adornments, save one. He was trying to pull the moonstone ring I had given him off his little finger. Maybe he felt even that was enough to remind him of what Ares had done, but I couldn't stand by and say nothing.

I put my hand over his, stopping him from working at the ring. He looked up at me in surprise, so I shook my head. "No. Keep it to remember that you won this battle, that you can't be turned back into what you were."

He still looked doubtful. I wasn't sure what else I could say that would convince him. Behind him, the sunlight glittered on the waves, drawing my gaze out over the sparkling sea. I stared for a moment, then closed my eyes briefly against the dazzling glare.

In the afterimage behind my eyelids, I saw Iolaus, and someone who could only have been his little mermaid. She was very beautiful, with blue eyes that almost matched his own, and long wavy hair just a bit lighter than his. Although there were nooses tied around both of their necks, their foreheads were touching, and they stared into each others' eyes, totally enraptured. Then they separated a little and I heard him say, "Nautica?"

"Yes, Iolaus?" she responded.

"Will you marry me?"

"Oh, yes, Iolaus!"

The smile on his face was genuine now, and I thought it would last. I had not the foggiest notion of how they were ever supposed to be together, much less get married, but they very clearly were.

Then the strange vision was gone, and I opened my eyes. Iolaus stood by himself, framed by the shining sea and still looking uncertainly at the ring on his finger.

"Please," I said, "if you don't want to wear it yourself, then at least keep it and save it for the one you truly love. I have a feeling you'll need something to use as a wedding gift sometime soon."

"Euphonius, what are you talking about?"

"Just keep it, huh? Trust me."

He nodded, but didn't say anything. Just then, Hercules appeared holding Iolaus' clothes.

"Found them over in the corner," he said softly. Then, with a smile: "Ares always was a neat housekeeper."

Iolaus dressed quickly. There were a few livid bruises on his body, probably where the jewelry he'd been wearing had been forced against the altar. Other than that, he didn't seem to be hurt. I wondered if his spirit was in as good a condition as his body.

I guess my concern showed in my face, since he remarked, "Hey, don't worry. I'm okay. I really meant what I said to Ares, you know. I'll be fine."

I nodded.

Then he placed one hand gently on my forearm and added, "How about you?"

"I'll survive. Takes more than watching a stupid God rape a friend of mine to seriously bother me." I patted his hand as I went on, "As long as you're okay."

He gave me a tight-lipped smile. "I'm fine, merchant."

"Don't call me --" I started to protest, then I saw the corners of his mouth turn up into that bright smile he has.

"Don't worry. I was only kidding," he said.

Hercules, meanwhile, had been watching us with varying degrees of non-comprehension and confusion on his handsome face.

"Iolaus?" he said at last. "How about we do some fishing? After all, we're already near the sea. There's a town just down the road. You could maybe tell me what went on here while we're doing it?"

"Yeah, sure. That sounds good." He turned to me. "What are you going to do now?"

"I guess I'll head home." I held my hands out and shrugged. "Of course, it would help if I knew where we are."

"Oh, that's easy," Hercules said. "We're just outside Karystos, on Euboea."

Well, that explained the ocean on the other side of the window. We were quite a ways from where I lived, though. It would be a long trip home, especially with very little money still left to me. I could always sell the necklace I was wearing, but somehow I didn't want to do that. Wait a moment, what was I thinking? Hadn't Ares dumped all kinds of valuable stuff off his altar and onto the floor? I glanced around the temple. Yeah, and it was still there.

"Want to come with us as far as the town?" Iolaus asked.

Yeah, I must admit I did want to go with him. But I also figured he needed some time alone to talk to Hercules about what had happened.

"You two go on," I said. "I'll catch up with you later. I'm going to sort out which of this jewelry is mine." I winked and leered at them in an attempt to look comically greedy. "And I just might pick out a few other baubles also, since I figure Ares owes us for the grief he put us through. Maybe you can afford to throw this kind of merchandise out the window, buddy, but I sure can't."

"Okay. See you later, then."

I watched them walk out of the temple. As they went through the door, Hercules draped his arm around the other man's shoulder companionably, and I knew I was right to stay behind. They needed the time together.

I turned to the task of retrieving the jewelry from the floor. While picking things up, I found the pendant from my broken necklace. Standing up to ease my aching knees, I rubbed the smooth surface of the amber between my fingers. Maybe my brave words to Ares hadn't been entirely true. Maybe I was still stuck, like the dead bugs in my pendant. Stuck on a sweet, brave man who would never be mine.

I decided I wouldn't be selling this particular piece of amber, as I had originally planned. I thought I might just keep it, to remind me of the little blond hero I knew I'd never have for my own.


	6. HARDER EVERY TIME

HARDER EVERY TIME  
"A mermaid?! Aphrodite turned him into a mermaid?!" I said in stunned disbelief.   
"Well, technically, I think the proper term would be merman," Hercules corrected me. "Iolaus was hardly a maid, you know."  
Oh yeah, I had reason to know that pretty well. Reasons I wasn't exactly going to tell the other man sitting next to me on the beach, especially considering the amount of wine I knew he had drunk. I wasn't entirely sober myself, but I wasn't so soused that I'd open my big mouth about Iolaus and me. Not yet, at any rate.  
"Uh -- okay. Merman." I glanced sideways at Hercules. "Half fish?" I asked. He nodded. "Tail instead of legs?" He nodded again. "Lives in the water?" He nodded some more. "Oh, shit!" I finally exclaimed.  
Hercules just took another long swig from the wineskin in his hand and continued to nod drearily in agreement with my assessment of the situation.  
I had caught up with the demi-God in the Slippery Eel Tavern in this small seaport town just a couple of hours ago. It had been still early in the evening, and he was far too drunk. When I had first caught sight of him, I had looked around hopefully for Iolaus. After all, we had just parted company that morning, after Hercules had rescued the two of us from Ares. It had taken me longer than it should have to make my way into the town, as I'd run across someone on the road who had recognized me and wanted to look over my merchandise.  
For those of you with minds as dirty as mine, I'm not talking about that sort of merchandise. I'm referring to the jewelry I sell.  
At any rate, my prospective customer and I had spent the biggest part of the day haggling over prices. By the time I'd gotten back on the road and reached the seaport, it was well after nightfall, and far too late for the two of them to still be doing the fishing I knew they had planned. I went to the Slippery Eel, looking for a meal, a room, and perhaps my two friends.  
Well, I had found one of them, at least. I sat down by the big man, greeting him casually and asking for Iolaus' whereabouts.  
"Gone," was the terse answer. He didn't even look up at me, just drank some more, as my heart fell through the soles of my suede boots.  
"What do you mean, gone? Gone where? He's okay, isn't he?"  
Still staring morosely down at the table, the demi-God nodded, hopefully in answer to my last question. At least nothing terrible had happened to Iolaus.  
"Tell me what's going on," I requested.  
He shook his head and raised his tankard to his lips once more.  
Now, I had no reason to believe that Hercules was a heavy drinker. Besides, I wanted answers, and I wanted them now. Perhaps foolishly, I waited until he set the mug down and then placed both my hands over the top.  
"Where is he, and what happened? Damn it, man, I want to know! I happen to be very fond of Iolaus!"  
Hercules' eyes focused. He shook the long hair out of his face and really looked at me for the first time since I had sat down. Some of the wine-induced bleariness went out of his eyes. "Oh -- uh -- Euphonius, right? We just left you this morning."  
I nodded. At least he'd remembered my name and actually gotten it right. That's more than some people do.  
"Yeah. That's me. Now tell me why he's gone, and where he's gone to."  
Hercules looked around the tavern, which was quickly filling with revelers. A pained expression came over his face and he exhaled with a resigned sigh. "All right, but not here." He stood up, weaving slightly from side to side. "Take a walk with me. If I can still walk, that is." He waved at the bartender as he put one large arm around my shoulder and we started across the crowded room. "Two fresh wineskins for me and my friend here," he ordered.  
"Uh -- I really think you've had enough," I said, as he stumbled and we both nearly went down.  
"You're gonna need it," he insisted, gathering up the wine. I tossed a coin to the barkeep as we headed for the door.  
We walked, if you can call it that, to the edge of town and onto a fairly empty stretch of beach. It was long past sundown, and the stars were bright in a clear summer sky, but there was no moon.  
"Yeah, this is good. Much quieter here," my companion said, his words a bit slurred. "Sit down. I'll tell you all about it." He handed me one of the wineskins, then focused his eyes out over the waves. "Did Iolaus tell you about Nautica?"  
"Yeah. A little."  
"Okay. Well, we ran into her this morning, while we were sitting on the dock and fishing."  
He went on to tell me about how they had discovered that she was being forced into marrying someone else in order to save her father's life, and they had tried to stop the wedding, with some help from Aphrodite.  
My breath caught for a moment when he described Iolaus and Nautica tied up and standing on a barrel, nooses around their necks, as they were about to be strung up. It was the very same thing I had seen in what I can only call a vision, shortly before we had parted company at Ares' temple early that same morning. I'd never expected it to come true so fast, if at all.  
My stomach lurched when Hercules told me about Iolaus declaring he'd give up the world for Nautica. After that, I knew what was coming.  
By the time the demi-God had reached the end of his tale, he had drained his wineskin and started sharing mine. He was no longer making any effort to hide the tears running down his cheeks.  
"As we watched them swim away," he concluded at last, "Aphrodite turned to me and said, 'It's hard to say good-bye.' Her words tore at my heart, but I just looked out over the ocean, seeing Serena's face in my mind, and then my other Iolaus' smile, as he disappeared into the Light, then this Iolaus, with the love glowing in his eyes for his mermaid. 'It's harder every time,' I managed to reply."  
He shrugged and drank more. "That's it. That's the story. I've lost both of them." Finally, he looked at me and tried to smile. "The only real consolation is that he's out there somewhere, alive and well and happy."  
"But you're here, and alone," I pointed out, trying to get past the pain searing my own heart.  
"Yeah. I guess we're both alone, aren't we?" He continued to study me. "You were very fond of him too, weren't you?"   
That was an understatement, but I figured I'd best let it stand. "Yeah. He was -- a good friend."   
Hercules looked at me strangely, but didn't ask further. Instead, his eyes returned to the sea, where the small waves washed up on the beach, whispering softly to each other.   
I sat there arguing with myself. Okay, do I tell him the rest of the truth, and risk being taken apart with his bare hands? No, he wouldn't really do that, just because Iolaus and I had spent some time in bed together. But I knew the hurt I'd see in his eyes, so I kept silent.   
Besides, I wasn't at all sure I could talk about it myself. Recalling what had happened at Ares' temple had been painful enough before I'd known Iolaus was gone. Now, it was sheer torture. I saw in my mind the expression on his face as he was being tormented by the God of War. And I had been a part of that torment, even though I had done it only in order to spare him as much as possible. That unfortunate incident would be the last time Iolaus and I would ever see each other again, and it had been so awful for him.   
If only things could have been different! And now they never would be, not if he was actually a merman, and preparing to be wed, or perhaps by now actually married, to Triton's fair daughter.   
I fought down the jealousy that rose in my mind at that last thought. If I loved him, how then could I begrudge him that happiness?   
"Give me back the wine, huh?" I asked Hercules. I took a big swallow, then dumped the rest into the sand.   
"Hey! Why'd you go and do that?" my companion demanded, none too happily and none too soberly.   
"Because it won't help. Not really. Trust me on this. The Gods know, I've tried it often enough myself."   
"I know. But what will?"   
"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Only perhaps enough time, and the knowledge that the ones you love are well and happy."   
Herc nodded in unhappy agreement with my assessment of the situation. For a time, we both just sat there, each with our own memories of both the hunter and the jester.   
"I know you and the first Iolaus were lovers," I said carefully, "but you loved this one too, didn't you?" I nodded slightly towards the ocean.   
He glanced at me with a "How'd you know that?" expression on his face.   
"It wasn't hard to see, if you know what you're looking at," I assured him. "I'm right, aren't I?"   
"It might be more accurate to say I would have liked to have loved him," was the bitter reply.   
"Because of the Sovereign?"   
"Yeah. Until this morning, Iolaus never came right out and told me, but I gathered that at least a part of the abuse that bastard had dumped on him was sexual."  
Suddenly, Hercules was on his feet, glowering at something only he could see. "The Sovereign -- me, in another world. How could I --?"   
I remembered what Iolaus had told me about my particular incarnation in that inverted universe, and I knew exactly what he meant. "It wasn't you," I said softly, wishing I could entirely believe my own words. "Or maybe it was you, but only as you would have been under different circumstances."   
"I know. My mind tells me that. I've met the Sovereign, and fought with him. But when I think of anyone hurting Iolaus that way --" He ran one hand through his long hair, pushing it out of his face. Then he began pacing back and forth as he went on, "But we look so much alike. If it hurt me to look at him, because he reminded me so much of my Iolaus, what must it have done to him, being around me all the time? I saw the fear in his eyes once or twice, when I startled him or surprised him when he wasn't paying attention. I didn't dare tell him anything of what I felt, because I was afraid I'd scare him away permanently."   
I looked up at the big man standing in front of me. He seemed as if he needed some sort of absolution for his imagined sins. Well, maybe so did I.   
Then he sighed heavily and held out his hands in a helpless gesture. "Maybe if we'd had more time to get used to each other. Maybe if I'd --" He left that hanging. "Well, even then, maybe he wouldn't have been interested. He certainly fell for a woman quickly enough, so maybe he doesn't even care for men. It isn't really the thing to do, at least not among men the same age. Older men with young men is more the standard in our society."   
He turned away and stared back out over the ocean. "But why am I telling you this? You know it already, don't you?"   
I just nodded. There were too many feelings running through my slightly-bleary brain just then. All I wanted to do was go off somewhere and try to sort them all out.   
He squatted down next to me. "Maybe it was my fault," he went on. "Maybe I should have tried harder with him, and he'd have loved me too." Picking up a handful of sand , he let it run through his fingers, staring at it and shaking his hand.   
His words cut me to the quick, because I'd been thinking the exact same thing. I'd have liked to have gotten up and walked away, to be alone with my own sorrow. But the edge of despair in the other man's voice cut a new gash in my bleeding heart. I had known his first Iolaus for a few days, but the two of them had been together for most of a lifetime. What was my loss, really, compared to his?   
"No. Don't eat yourself up over this," I said in reassurance. "Iolaus knew. Or, at least, after last night with Ares, he knew. A few things were said about you."   
Yeah, by my big mouth. But I didn't mention that. Instead, I put my hand gently on his forearm -- well, on that fancy silver doodad he wears on the leather gauntlet, at any rate -- and said, "This Iolaus may have been forced into sex with the Sovereign, and may even have considered making love to men of his own freewill." Yeah, like he did with me a few times. "But I think he was basically interested in women, in the final analysis. Even so, I know he cared for you, and he knew that you cared for him."   
"You really mean that?"   
"Yes. And I knew him -- pretty well."   
Herc nodded, never even asking me the obvious question about just how I knew him that well. I found myself wondering precisely how much Iolaus had told him about last night, and about me. Was the man truly so ingenuous, or merely being kind enough not to push it? Either way, I turned the conversation back toward a more general subject. "Choice of sexual partners is more of a continuum than an either/or situation. Some of us fall towards one end, some towards the other, but there's a lot of space in between."   
"Yeah, you could be right," he agreed. "I mostly tend to love women myself, but there have been exceptions." He smiled crookedly. "Iolaus, in both of his incarnations, was probably the biggest exception, but there were a couple of others."   
"So the bards have said," I replied with a smile, hoping to lighten the mood.   
"Really?" The shocked expression on his face might have been funny, under other circumstances. "You mean, they wrote about that too? Oh, -- shit!" he concluded, as if the word weren't normally part of his vocabulary and he was trying it on for size.   
"That's one of the problems with being a hero; you have very few secrets."   
He sat back down alongside me, staring again out over the surf. "You know, Euphonius, maybe I'm more than a little tired of being a hero. Maybe I'd have been better off being something else." The bitterness in his voice surprised me almost as much as the frown that spread over his handsome face. "Maybe the people I loved would have been better off, if I'd been something else."   
"Hercules, that isn't --"   
He cut me off with a curt gesture of his hand. "Maybe I should have done more things for myself, taken more of what I wanted out of life, instead of trying to live up to some impossible ideal." His voice was harsh and angry now. "I could have stayed home with Deianeira and the children, and been an ordinary man. I didn't have to break up with Morrigan. Maybe I even could have changed time so that I had Serena --" He hesitated. "Oh, sorry. You probably don't know about Serena, and I've been talking about her as if you did."   
"Yeah, I know. The first Iolaus told me. Or at least he told me what he could remember of it. He said it was like a strange memory, as if it had happened, but it hadn't."   
Oops! I didn't think I'd mentioned to Hercules before that I'd known the original Iolaus, and I'd just let that remark slip out. But he didn't catch it, much to my relief.   
"Playing with time is like that," was all he said.   
"Maybe it's something that's best left to the Gods," I suggested.   
He snorted in derision at my mention of the Gods. "Much good that would do. They'd probably screw it up totally." Then he went on, "But I can't blame the Gods for everything, can I? Some of it is my fault. I chose to be what I am. I give up too much for others, and then cry when I have nothing left. I mean, look at what just happened with Iolaus. I never even tried to love him, before he fell for someone else. And I was the one who suggested the solution to Aphrodite. What is it with me? Why do I do these things? Do I just like to screw myself?"   
Now, how was I supposed to answer that? "You do it because you're a good and decent man, who cares more about the happiness of others than about your own. There aren't all that many people like you out there. As I said, I've heard the stories the bards tell. I know you've lost just about everyone you've ever loved. But that happens to ordinary people too, often enough."   
He still looked pretty damn unhappy. I tried to come up with something that would encourage him, but I'm afraid I didn't do too well. "Come on, man. It's not so bad to be a famous hero. Look there." I pointed up at the sky, locating the vaguely rectangular shape next to the Corona Borealis. "There's even a constellation of stars called by your name, because of all the marvelous things you've done."   
He didn't so much as look up. "So what? That's just a bunch of stars. I can't hold them close when I'm lonely, or feel their fingers caressing my skin."   
Okay, he had a point there. If that's how he was feeling, perhaps a different sort of consideration would work better. "Do you think there aren't literally hundreds of women in this world, not to mention a fair number of men, who wouldn't be very happy to love you, on any terms? That's another one of the perks of being famous, you know."   
Smashing one big fist into the sand to emphasize his words, he exclaimed, "I don't want them. I want him!"   
So do I. Oh, so do I! But I couldn't exactly tell Hercules that, could I?   
I truly felt in no mood to console the demi-God, since I was pretty miserable myself over Iolaus' leaving. But my feelings weren't the most important thing here. He was. I knew full well that Hercules was far more important to the world than I would ever be, because he had the power to inspire the rest of us to be heroes also, in our own ways. I sell jewelry: he sells hope and courage. There could be no comparison.   
Besides, I knew full well that Iolaus, in either version of himself, wouldn't have wanted to see Hercules give up. And I cared enough about Iolaus to know I had to give it my best try.   
"Maybe I should have done what my father wanted," the other man went on, "and joined him as a God on Mount Olympus. Maybe the offer is still open, and it's still an option."   
"Just what we need," I replied with a snort, "another God. As if we don't have more than enough of them already."   
I was genuinely alarmed at the direction his thoughts were taking, but I wasn't quite sure what to say. Hercules gave me a sidelong glance, evidently surprised by my remark.   
"We need heroes, not Gods," I elaborated. "We need the ones who inspire us to be like them. We need someone who shows us it is possible, or we lose hope. We need the ones who encourage us to be more than we are, and more than we ever thought we could be." I stopped abruptly, somewhat surprised at the intensity of the feeling that had inspired my words. Then I plunged on. "I can see why your Iolaus loved you, and why he chose to spend his life by your side. You bring out the best in people." I drew in a deep breath before concluding, "We need Hercules the hero, not Hercules the God."   
But he closed his eyes and shook his head in negation of my fervent words.   
"That's not true," he stated flatly.   
"Of course it is! Look what you did for this Iolaus, just by being his friend. So he's gone. So he won't be yours. So what? Part of him is yours forever, because you showed him how to find his own courage. You set his feet on a better path."   
Even as I said it, I realized that this Iolaus had taught me a few things about courage himself. Several times while I'd known him, he'd risked his life for other people and things, which had prompted me to do the same. Oh, I was no hero. I knew that. But thanks largely to his example, I had found that I wasn't the craven coward I'd always thought myself to be either. And you know what? It's a good feeling.   
But, despite my words, Hercules shook his head again. "Maybe I was only being selfish when I brought him to this world. I've asked myself over and over whether I wanted this Iolaus for himself, or just because he reminded me so much of my other Iolaus. I honestly don't know. That's another reason I never came on to him. Unless I could answer that question, it wouldn't have been fair."   
"At least you took the time to think about what was fair. Most men go after whatever they can get, in any way possible, and don't worry about other considerations." I shrugged. "I ought to know. I've gone after a pretty face or a nice body often enough myself, with no thought of the person behind it." Putting one hand on his arm, I concluded, "Don't change. And don't regret any of it. You've done more good for this world than most of us."   
Pretty words. Now, if only I could take my own advice, especially about not regretting the past.   
But I might as well have kept quiet, for all the effect my words were having on the man beside me. He shook his head again. "I'm tired of dealing with mortals. You're all just too fragile. No matter what I do, I can't keep the people I love alive."   
"You can't be responsible for everyone," I said. "And this Iolaus is still alive and probably very happy with Nautica right now."   
He winced. Yeah, I guess that thought wasn't exactly very comforting, in certain ways.   
"I let Dahok kill the other Iolaus," he said disconsolately.   
"As I heard the story, you couldn't have done much to stop it."   
"I should have been able to stop it, dammit!!"   
"You risked everything to save his soul, didn't you? What more do you want? You're half God. He was mortal," I pointed out. "Mortals can die. That's how it works."   
"Do you think I wasn't aware of that? I was Hercules, famous hero and demi-God, the strongest man in the world, able to heal faster, go farther, do anything. And here was little Iolaus, always by my side. I never forgot he was mortal." He hesitated a moment. "Well, most of the time, anyway. Sometimes I was able to forget. Sometimes I could pretend he'd be with me always." A determined look came over his face. "All I do is lose the ones I love. I'm tired of it. Maybe I'd be better off on Mount Olympus. I never want to be hurt like this again."   
He rose abruptly to his feet and bellowed at the sky, "Zeus!! I want to talk to you! Zeus!!"   
There was no answer. Nothing happened. I glanced around uneasily, but not so much as a sparkle disturbed the midnight darkness. Emboldened by this evidence of divine indifference, I stood up beside him and said gently, "You don't want to do this. You tried being a God once, remember? And you came back -- for your family. For -- him."   
He gave me that strange look again, but didn't ask how I knew about that. All he said was, "But he's not here anymore. Why should I bother?" He turned away from me and shook his fist at the stars. "Zeus!!" he bellowed again, his voice filled with anger. "Zeus, damn you! Answer me!!"   
"Look," I said, when nothing happened, "at least wait until morning, when all that wine you've drunk has worn off and you can consider this more clearly."   
I put one hand on his arm, trying to get him to sit down again. He shook it off, and bellowed once again at the empty sky.   
Well, I'd tried my best to dissuade him, and failed. What else was left to me?   
That's when I heard that familiar voice in my mind, the one I'd heard a few times before and never quite known what to make of it. The one that sounded so much like the Iolaus I once knew briefly, just before he died.   
"Euphonius, do something! If Hercules turns aside from his destiny, the Darkness is always there, waiting for him. To become a full God, in this frame of mind, could be very dangerous."   
Well, whether or not it truly was Iolaus' voice in my head, the point it made was true enough.   
"He's in too much pain right now," it continued. "Do you really want someone that angry at almost everything and everyone to be able to toss fireballs around?"   
I certainly couldn't deny that. The potential for great good exists only where there is also the potential for great evil. With merely his incredible strength as a half-God, Hercules could be very dangerous, if he chose to be. And with the complete power of a God, he could become truly vicious.   
The flip side of that, of course, is that he could be a correspondingly enormous force for good, so long as that was what he chose to do. And this man obviously had. But that didn't mean he didn't know the Darkness. We all do. And it didn't mean he was impervious to temptation, especially not now, when he was hurting so badly.   
"What do you want me to do?" I asked the voice in my head. Iolaus or not, it might have some decent advice. Still, it was at times like these that I seriously questioned my sanity.   
"Stop him."   
"I tried to convince him," I protested. "It didn't work."   
"I didn't mean you should talk to him."   
"Then what am I supposed to do? Wrestle him to the ground and gag him, so he can't call Zeus?" Oh, I was definitely going off the deep end now.   
"No," came the slightly amused response. "He's hurting. He's alone. Help him."   
"I could maybe send him a fruit basket?" I suggested.   
"Euphonius!!"   
"Hey, relax. I was only kidding." Yep, Euphonius. Right over the edge, for sure.   
"Give him someone to hold onto, you idiot!" the voice fairly screamed at me. But the tone wasn't insulting, despite the epithet. It almost sounded as if he were smothering a laugh as he elaborated, "Screw him."   
"Who? Me?"   
"Do you see anyone else around? Come on, he just needs someone to care about him. You can do that, can't you?   
"You're serious?" I blithered.   
"Yep."   
"Oh, great! And exactly how am I supposed to do it?"   
"Oh, I'm sure you'll think of something," came the amused reply.   
Hercules, meanwhile, was still standing there glaring at the moonless sky. No, on closer inspection, he wasn't quite glaring anymore. He looked rather distracted, and perhaps a bit uncomfortable. And almost as if he'd seen -- or heard? -- a ghost.   
I touched his arm. "Hercules? You okay?"   
"Uh -- yeah. I -- uh -- Well, Iolaus -- the first Iolaus, I mean -- he sort of -- uh -- talks to me sometimes," he admitted, still staring uneasily up at the brightly-sparkling stars in the constellation that bore his name.   
I was tempted to ask what he thought he had heard, but didn't dare. I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to know.   
"Anyway, I think he does," the big man went on, sounding doubtful and confused. "Maybe I'm just imagining it, because I miss him so much. You know, the dead are supposed to hear your thoughts, and all? But no one ever said they might answer you."   
"You aren't imagining it," I assured him. "It happens to me too. I thought I was crazy. You know, thinking about him too much, or something?" I gave him my brightest smile. "We could both just sit here and go insane together, you know."   
Damn! I'd gone and done it again. If I had never even told Hercules that I'd known the original Iolaus, I'd certainly never told him that I'd known the man well enough to care about him and think of him after he was dead. And I'd certainly never told him about all the times when Dahok had been pretending to be Iolaus, and I had -- No, I didn't even want to go there.   
The demi-God smiled crookedly at me, but there were tears shining in his eyes. "Yeah, that's it. Maybe we're both crazy?" He turned away, covering his face with his hands. "It's just that it sounds so much like him, and it breaks my heart."   
Somewhat hesitantly, I put my hands gently on his back and rubbed. "It's all right. I understand," I said, as the tears overflowed from my eyes also.   
It wasn't long before Hercules turned around and wrapped his arms around me. The bruises on my back hurt a bit when he touched them, but I wasn't about to complain. It felt too good, despite the pain.   
For a long moment, we just stood there. I pressed the side of my face against the soft fabric of the shirt he wore, not altogether certain whether I was merely trying to comfort a friend, or follow my imagined Iolaus' instructions to seduce him, but not really caring, since it felt so good just to have another human body in my arms, when I was hurting so much. The tears running down my face were not unwelcome. After all, the first thing I had ever learned from Iolaus, back when he was still alive, was that there's no shame in feeling sorrow, or in crying over it.   
"I'm sorry," the demi-God said at last, loosening his hold on me somewhat and wiping his face with one hand. "There have just been -- too many good-byes lately, I guess."   
"I know the feeling," I replied, trying to steady my voice and surreptitiously wipe my own eyes.   
He drew back, holding me at arms-length as he said, "There's more here than you're telling me, isn't there? We don't know each other well enough for you to be crying over me."   
Our eyes met, and an instant understanding passed between us. (Yes, it really does happen that way sometimes. You look at someone else's face, and you just know they know exactly how you feel.)   
When I didn't answer, he stated flatly, "You loved Iolaus also, didn't you?"   
Sudden anger flashed in his eyes. His hands were painfully tight around my upper arms, and he had lifted me almost off of my feet. Deliberately, or just because he wasn't paying attention to the effect of his strength? I wasn't entirely sure if he was asking the question about this Iolaus, or the other one, or even both of them.   
"Okay," I admitted, "Yes, I loved him. And yes, in answer to the question you haven't asked, I had sex with him."   
There. That was an honest answer, regardless of which of them he had meant.   
The big man winced visibly, but at least he didn't pick me up and toss me into the ocean. That was a good sign. But when I met his eyes, I saw his pain.   
"Well," he said at last, "that's more than I ever managed to do."   
Okay, that meant he was thinking of the Iolaus who had just left, not the other one. I permitted myself a small sigh of relief.   
However, that relief turned out to be premature. His grip on my arms tightened a bit more. "Wait a minute. You said you heard his voice in your mind too, and I don't think you're talking about telepathy with a mermaid -- uh -- merman." His expression darkened as he thought back over our conversation. "Both of them?"   
"Uh, yeah," I had to admit. By now my feet were dangling in the air and I was staring him in the face, not an entirely comfortable position.   
His usually handsome features twisted into something I hope I never see again, and I had a quick glimpse of what this man could be like, if he ever gave in to the Darkness. I figured I might be about to join Iolaus on the Other Side.   
"I wasn't trying to take him away from you," I said desperately. "It was only one night, and it was when you'd gone off to be a God. You'd left him, and he was alone and hurting, that's all. He loved you, Herc. He always has."   
"Don't call me that." His voice was harsh and raw.   
"What?" I asked, puzzled.   
"Herc. Don't call me that."   
"But Iolaus referred to you that way," I pointed out.   
"I know. And he's the only one allowed to do it. You're not, you cheap little over-aged whore."   
Okay, maybe I deserved that. I certainly wasn't going to argue the point. A very angry half-God is not something one particularly wants to see. Not from up close, anyway.   
"Uh -- all right -- Hercules."   
From his infuriated expression, I felt I knew pretty much what it had been like for poor Iolaus with the Sovereign. And that gave me an idea, albeit a dangerous one.   
"Why don't you just grow a beard and a moustache?" I asked him scornfully.   
Now it was his turn to be puzzled. "What in Hades' name are you talking about?"   
"I figure if you're going to start acting like the Sovereign, you should at least try to look like him also," I quipped. "I know a good place to buy some pretty stunning black leather outfits, if you're interested. You'd look good in something like that."   
For a long moment, I thought I'd pushed him too far. His fingers dug into my arms so hard that I couldn't stifle a yelp of pain. Visions of my dismembered body washing up on shore tomorrow morning flashed across my mind.   
Then he froze, his face changing abruptly. He squeezed his eyes closed, and tears seeped out around the edges.   
"Oh -- shit!" he said in a ragged whisper.   
I was still dangling in the air, and I had no feeling in my arms below the elbows.   
"Uh -- Herc -- Hercules, I mean. Put me down, huh? I'm afraid of heights." I'm not, really. But it sounded like a good line, at the time.   
He opened his eyes, looked at me, looked down at the sand, then shook his head and set me on my feet, much to my relief.   
"I'm sorry," he said at last. "You were only trying to tell me that Iolaus loved me. I had no right --"   
I rubbed my bruised arms, trying to get the circulation back. "It's okay."   
"No, it's not okay. I knew Iolaus bedded lots of women, even while we were together. I shouldn't have been surprised that there would be other men also. After all, we never promised each other that there wouldn't be. I had no right to get so angry, and I'm sorry if I hurt you."   
"But you didn't. See?" I held out my arms, as if to show that everything was undamaged.   
His pain-filled gaze met mine. "I'm just so lost without him."   
I moved closer. "Iolaus loved you, Hercules, more than he loved life itself. Do you think he would want to see you so unhappy now?"   
The big man smiled tentatively. Apparently taking my still outstretched arms as an invitation, he stepped forward and wrapped his own arms around me in a hug that may well have been meant as comradely, except that I leaned into it and wrapped my own arms around him in return. Somehow, we just didn't let go when we should have. Instead, he tightened the embrace, holding me so hard that the heavy metal of his belt buckle dug almost painfully into my ribs. He sighed.   
Along with the belt buckle, there was something else pushing firmly against me, and I didn't think it was made of metal. "I guess you only spoke the naked truth, huh?" I said gently.

"What are you talking about?" His voice had that soft-edged, slightly-distracted quality you get when your body begins to react to something.   
"What you told Aphrodite?" I squirmed deliberately against him so he'd be sure to know what I was talking about. "It really does get harder every time, doesn't it?"   
He sort of laughed. "Sometimes it feels that way." For the space of a couple of heartbeats, he said nothing, then, "Uh -- Euphonius?"   
"If that was a question, the answer is yes."   
"I rather thought you'd say that." He leaned down and kissed me. His breath smelled of the wine he'd been drinking, but his lips were delicious, at the same time both gentle and fiercely demanding.   
Do I really have to tell you that I kissed him back? We took turns exploring each other's mouths with our tongues.   
I know, I know. I have a tendency to think too much, in a situation where all I really should be doing is feeling. I can't help it. That's just how I am. Even while I was passionately kissing the demi-God, I couldn't help thinking about the irony of the current situation. Here was Hercules, a bit too drunk and missing Iolaus. My first time with the original Iolaus, he had been drunk and missing Hercules. He had no more wanted me for myself than Hercules did now, and I knew it. Isn't life strange sometimes?   
Well, I really didn't care all that much why he wanted me. It still felt damn good, and I wanted it to keep on. After the frustrating time I'd had last night, courtesy of the God of War, just about anything would have been welcome. And Hercules certainly didn't come under the category of "just about anything".   
In any case, as the kiss deepened and our hands started roaming around each other's bodies, I finally stopped thinking for a while.   
It didn't take too long for me to get Herc's shirt untucked from his pants, so I could wrap my arms around his naked back. I've always loved touching people. I can get turned on just running my fingers over someone else's skin, not to mention what happens when someone else touches me. And if the skin is smooth and soft, with hard muscle underneath the surface, so much the better.   
As I raked my fingernails lightly down his back and across his hips just above his belt, he broke off the kiss and straightened up with a sharp intake of breath.   
Being relatively short has its advantages: as I stood pressed tightly against his chest, his nipples were conveniently located for my mouth to find. Not all men like that sort of thing, so I just licked tentatively across one of them, at first. When he arched his back and thrust his hips against me, I took that for a sign of encouragement and began sucking harder.   
Yes, I felt the increasing pressure of my own cock, but right then I was concentrating on the other man's arousal, not my own. I slid one hand around to his chest and started playing with his other nipple, even as I continued working on the one in my mouth. His hands clutched my ass, pulling our lower bodies tightly together.   
I tried to get my other hand down to his belt, in order to open his pants, but heavy belt buckles are pretty difficult to unfasten when they're trapped between two squirming bodies. In a sort of unspoken mutual agreement, we stepped apart in order to make it easier, each working on his own clothing. My tunic, shirt, and drawstring trousers came off a whole lot faster than those tight woven-leather pants he wears, not to mention the boots.   
It was dark on the beach. Still no moon. But the starlight was enough to show me the man standing in front of me as he struggled out of the last of his clothes. Looking at him naked, I wondered briefly what it would be like to have a body and face that beautiful. Sure as death and taxes, I'd never know. Still, I wasn't so naïve as to think it was only a good thing. All too often, surface beauty attracts surface emotions. Like any gift of the Gods, it might be a blessing, or it might be a curse.   
Oh, but I truly wouldn't mind being cursed like that!   
I had no time for further consideration as he pulled me up against him. Once again, the height difference made itself very obvious, as his hard cock was against my stomach, while mine was halfway down his thighs.   
He solved that problem very easily, as I was certain he'd done many times before, by simply lifting me in his arms and laying me on the sand, while he lay down alongside me so that we were face to face.   
"There," he said softly. "Now we're the same height, right?"   
The question didn't require an answer, so it didn't get one. I wrapped myself around him, as he pulled me into his arms, working our cocks back and forth between our thighs.   
Now, it's entirely possible to get off this way, and many men prefer it to other styles of love-making. If we simply continued what we were doing, we'd both come. But there were other options available and I had enough time to wonder just exactly where we would go from here, if anywhere. It's always a bit of a question, with a stranger. You know. What does he like? What is he willing to accept? And what won't he do under any circumstances?   
Euphonius, I told myself firmly, shut up and fuck.   
"I'd like more than this," Hercules whispered in my ear a few moments later. "If it's all right with you?"   
He had the strength to break me in half, yet still he asked my permission?   
"It's fine with me. But I'm really not in the mood to lie flat on my back, if you don't mind. Your brother kind of tossed me into a wall."   
"Ares did that?" he said, sounding shocked. "He should be more careful what he does with mortals. It's one thing to throw me around, or one of his Godling flunkies. We can handle it."   
"I didn't exactly break anything. Just a lot of bruises and scrapes," I assured him.   
He immediately loosened his hold. "Have I been hurting you?"   
"Oh, Gods, no! Don't let go." I smiled and kissed him gently.   
"Euphonius?" he asked tentatively, as we broke off the kiss.   
"Yeah?"   
"Fuck me."   
"What?" I replied stupidly.   
He smiled. "I know what you're thinking. Iolaus was the pretty one, the little one, so it's natural to assume he was the one on the bottom, right? Well, it wasn't always like that between us. Sometimes Iolaus would --"   
"Okay, I get the picture. As they say, never assume."   
"You don't mind?"   
"Mind? Oh heavens, no!"   
He laid down beside me again and we went back to our mutual caressing and squirming against each other, but now I knew where it was going. It's usually better not to rush into such things. I took his cock into my hand, teasing gently at the partially retracted foreskin and then rubbing my palm along the bottom of his shaft, while my fingers encircled the rest of it loosely.   
When I felt he was just about ready, I asked softly, "How do you like it? On your back or on your knees?"   
"Considering all this sand, I think I'd rather not lie on my back."   
"Yeah. Gotcha." I sat up on my knees. "I need to get something first."   
Rummaging quickly through the heap of clothing on the sand, I pulled a little vial of scented oil out of my belt pouch.   
Hercules looked at me strangely.   
"You always carry that with you?" he asked.   
"Yeah," I admitted. "Be prepared: that's my motto."   
He laughed, as I had hoped he would. Sometimes sex should be very serious, but sometimes it's better if it's just fun. I didn't intend to give him too much time to think about the blond warrior whose cock he really wanted up his ass.   
I was about to pour more of the scented oil into my hand when he said, "Why don't you let me do that?"   
I gave him the bottle. Still lying on one side and watching me, he emptied some of the fragrant liquid into one large palm, propped his head on the other, and proceeded to rub the oil over my own very interested penis.   
Now, I had been trying all along to make it good for him and not pay too much attention to what I wanted, but that was getting, as they say, harder all the time. He seemed to be enjoying it, though, as he made a big production out of making sure I was well lubricated. I didn't complain.   
Just when I was beginning to forget what I was about to do, he got up and rolled over.   
Now, there are times when the entire concept of sex strikes me as so ridiculous that I actually do laugh, to the consternation of some of my partners. But this was beyond ridiculous: this was utterly fantastic. Never in my life had I expected to have the famous Hercules, son of Zeus and subject of stories and legends, on his hands and knees before me, with his pretty ass up in the air.   
I was truly grateful that he couldn't see the idiotic grin on my face as I spread his cheeks. As I started to press one finger into him, he whispered, "No. Just do it."   
All right then, he didn't need much in the way of preparation. My cock, although nicely long, was much thinner than Iolaus', so it really shouldn't be a problem. I entered him slowly, just in case, but he didn't so much as wince.   
Now, you're going to think I'm crazy here, but I felt disconnected somehow from the entire situation. It wasn't that it didn't feel good -- it did. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy what I was doing, especially when I reached around with one hand and started stroking his cock. Judging by the way we established a very satisfying mutual rhythm with a minimum of difficulty, we were both very much into it. And it certainly wasn't that the world didn't finally narrow down into one bright, blazing point of focus in my groin, straining for release. It's just that it was strange. As if something, or someone, who should have been there wasn't.   
Okay, maybe I was just thinking too much again. I couldn't help but feel that this would fall into the category of mercy fuck. However, I really wasn't sure which of us was showing mercy to the other. Herc may well have been using me, and I know for sure I was using him.   
But when he gasped Iolaus' name as he came, it was all I could do to stop myself from doing the same thing. The name, I mean. I couldn't have stopped my body's response to the other man's orgasm if I'd wanted to, as the muscles of his anus clamped rhythmically around my shaft, milking my cum into his body.   
When the last shiver of ecstasy had faded from our bodies, I pulled out and collapsed in the sand next to him.   
For a little while after that, neither of us said anything. Then I noticed him looking beyond me, where the waves rolled gently against the shore, and where, even now, Iolaus swam with his little mermaid. I knew what he had to be thinking.   
I propped myself up on one elbow, effectively blocking his view of the sea.   
"Let me ask you something," I said. "If you could forget completely about Iolaus, would you want that?"   
"No, not really. But it hurts so damn much to remember!"   
"Yeah, it does. But there's a lot of joy mixed in with that hurt, isn't there? A lot of fond memories and happy times?"   
"Yeah."   
Yeah. You and your Iolaus had a lifetime of memories, I thought resentfully. I had a few days with him before he died. That's it.   
No. This is no time for self-pity. Get a grip, Euphonius! If your memories aren't as long or as wonderful as his, then neither is the depth of your pain.   
"That's how it is in life," I went on. "You take the pain and the joy together. If you want the one, you have to take the other along with it."   
He said nothing, just closed his eyes and looked as if he was going to cry.   
"Herc?" Too late, I realized I'd called him by Iolaus' nickname. But this time, he didn't react to my slip, just glanced at me questioningly. "I've got sand in some pretty uncomfortable places. How about we take a quick dip to wash off?"   
"Sounds good to me."   
He stood up, then reached one hand down in invitation. When I grasped it, he pulled me to my feet. In companionable silence, we walked across the beach and into the water.   
The sea was calm that night. The waves were small and gentle, and we were easily able to wade out past where they were breaking. As the saltwater rose around me, I winced at the sudden sting where the scabs had been torn a little from the edges of a few of the scrapes on my back. But no matter. They would doubtless be better for the soaking, in the long run.   
We rinsed off, then floated for a bit on our backs, letting the waves lift us up in their arms.   
"You know, there's something I've been wondering," Hercules said at last.   
"Yeah? What?"   
"How do mermaids -- mermen? - merpeople? Damn, what does one call them? Well, anyway, how do they make love?"   
I came to my feet, toes just touching the sand below me. "Good question. I've never seen one up close. Have you?"   
"No. I only saw Iolaus in the water, swimming away."   
"So just how the fuck do they do it?"   
"You got me," he replied.   
"No, wrong tense. I had you."   
We both dissolved into helpless laughter, even though my remark hadn't been all that clever. I don't think I'd have been able to laugh any harder if he'd tickled me. (Which, thankfully, he did not. I hate that!)   
"Come on. Let's get out of here and get dressed, before I turn into a prune," I suggested, as the laughter subsided.   
We were back on the beach, trying to shake off as much of the moisture as possible before putting on our clothes, when Hercules said, apropos of nothing, "Iolaus told me what Ares did to him last night. Thanks for trying to help him, even if it wasn't entirely successful."   
"I just wish I could have done more. But why are you thanking me?" I replied, genuinely puzzled. "I didn't do anything for you. I was trying to protect Iolaus for his own sake."   
Herc seemed a bit taken aback by this. "I -- well, I always felt responsible for him, since I brought him to this universe and all."   
"Well, maybe you are responsible, to an extent. But we're all responsible for things, to an extent. Beyond that, it's the other person's doing, for better or for worse."   
He twisted his long hair, wringing out the water. "No, I should be able to --"   
"Oh, please!" I said as I stepped into my trousers. "Give us a break. Give yourself a break. You can't fix everything. Sometimes you just have to let us poor weak mortals make our own choices and take our own chances. Like us, do everything you can to make the world a better place, but realize it isn't going to happen immediately. Our children's children's children will be struggling with evil and darkness, no matter what you do, or what I do. It isn't going to go away. You may win a victory here and there against Dahok, but you won't destroy him. And even if you did, something else would crop up to take his place. That's just how it is."   
Whether or not he accepted my explanation, I was never to know. Before he could say anything in reply, the air just in front of him took on a sort of transparent sparkle, to be replaced quickly with a dignified-looking older man wearing ornate robes.   
Herc rapidly grabbed up his pants and held them in front of his groin. "Uh -- Father -- you really shouldn't -- " he began.   
Zeus waved a hand in a careless gesture. "Son, do you think I don't know what a man's body looks like by now?" He smiled. "Sorry it took me so long to get here. I heard you calling me, but I was busy at the time. I was actually going to pop in just a little while ago, but by then you seemed to be the busy one."   
As Hercules blushed, the King of the Gods came over and put an arm around his shoulders. "So what is it this time, boy? Is there something I can help you with?"   
His glance fell on me just briefly. Did I imagine it, or did one eyebrow lift a fraction, almost as if he were asking me a question?   
Now, I didn't even begin to think that a short time in my arms would make Hercules fall madly in love with me, much less convince him to continue with his mortal life just for my sake. He'd been willing to leave to become a God once before, and even his love for Iolaus hadn't been enough to stop him.   
However, sexual frustration can be a contributing factor to despair and hopelessness. He might at least be in a better mood now. At any rate, he hadn't rushed over to Zeus immediately and demanded a one-way ticket to Olympus.   
Before he could say anything, I stood up, still half naked, and determined to give it one last shot.   
"Hercules, remember what we said about the sorrow and the joy? That's what it is to be mortal. If you want to be part of our lives, you have to live with it."   
"I don't have to like it."   
I sighed, certain that I'd lost, and said resignedly, "Then go join the Gods on Mount Olympus, if you don't like things down here." A sudden pang of anger pierced my heart and drove my tongue to continue remorselessly, "You're lucky. You can run away. We can't. Go on, big man. Go crying to your immortal father. Go live forever with your precious relatives, and leave us to mourn our losses. But don't do it because you couldn't handle being mortal or because you just gave up. Do it because you feel that's where your destiny lies, or because you think you can do the most good that way, or for any other truly worthwhile reason. Do it because you're running to something, not running away." He looked so miserable. I put one hand up to stroke his cheek, moderating the anger in my voice. "Herc, do you really think Iolaus would respect your reasons, otherwise?"   
I shook my head and would have turned my back on them, but Hercules' big hand came down on my shoulder and he said to Zeus, "I'm sorry if I disturbed you, father."   
"That's all right," Zeus replied equably. "What was it you wanted me for, anyway?"   
"I've -- changed my mind." A slow smile spread across his face. "I guess it wasn't all that important anyway."   
The King of the Gods looked at his half-mortal son as if he'd gone crazy. Then he shook his head and smiled, as he sparkled out of sight.   
We spent the rest of that night sleeping on the beach in each other's arms, but when I awoke in the first light of sunrise, Hercules was gone. Gathering the rest of my clothes, I stood up and stretched. Then I dusted the sand off my trousers, pulled on my shirt and tunic, and tied my sash at my waist. With a rather stupid smile on my lips, I picked up the half-empty vial of oil from where we'd left it and tucked it away. Time to move on.   
I looked around the deserted beach, watching the sky turn bright as the sun crept up over the horizon. It was going to be a calm day. I stared into the growing sparkle of sunlight on the water.   
Wherever Hercules had gone, I wished him success in getting over his lost love. I knew I'd be all right, in time, for love had long ago taught me its most awful lesson: that I could live without it, if I had to.   
Absently, I reached into the pouch hanging at my waist and brought out the amber pendant that had played a part in the other night's activities with Ares. If only it could have been different, somehow. If only I could have held on to this Iolaus, and made him love me. But that hadn't happened, and both the Iolauses I had known and loved were gone forever.   
I ran my fingers over the smooth surface of the oval bead. I should forget them, both of them. Cast them out of my memory, and wipe them out of my heart. Yes, that would be best. Just toss them away, as I could toss this bit of amber out into the ocean, if I chose to do so. None of it had to be a part of my life anymore. None of it had to mean anything to me. I could do that. A quick flick of my wrist, a quick flick of my mind, and it would all be just part of the past, done and over and gone completely. I didn't have to hurt like this, if I didn't want to.   
I drew back my arm to throw. I didn't need this pain. I didn't want the memories of Iolaus -- no, not either of them. The golden hair, the quick wit, that flashing smile, his eyes, his honest loving truth. It would be far easier to live without all this, to give it up completely.   
I stood there, squinting into the fierce morning sunshine. Then I blinked, and the idyllic scenery blurred and floated sideways in the moisture that filled my eyes and ran slowly down my cheeks.   
Tasting the salt of my own tears, I lowered my arm.   
Tears like the sea, made of salt and water, a mixture of sorrow and joy.   
For this is what it means to be mortal: to live the sorrow, and the joy. Hadn't I told Hercules that very same thing?   
I put the piece of amber back into my pouch, wiping my face with the back of my hand, and looked out over the sparkling sea with a smile on my lips, thinking of the one who had bravely chosen to start over again in a strange world, not once, but twice.   
Farewell, Iolaus. May you find the happiness you deserve, in the new life you have chosen. Peace and love go with you always, dear heart.   
Only sometimes -- if you would -- remember me, as I shall remember you.


	7. ANYONE FOR A SWIM?

ANYONE FOR A SWIM?

 

I walked along the dock at Piraeus, still limping slightly from the wound in my leg that I'd received several weeks ago. As I studied the names on the bows of the various ships in port, I was searching for one called the Princess, hoping it would be a decent-looking vessel. The cries of the seabirds and the fresh smell of salty air brought back fond memories of the long ago time when I had been an aspiring sailor myself. 

I smiled as I recalled my lost youth. Ah, to have those days back once again!

My thoughts were jerked abruptly into the present as I caught sight of the ship I sought. My first impression was along the lines of "If that's a princess, then I'm a queen." It wasn't the most shipshape or seaworthy vessel I had ever laid eyes upon, but it was the only one bound for Mythemna on the Isle of Lesbos, so I had little choice. I had gotten a tip that a poetess by the name of Sappho was looking for designs for some very special jewelry she wanted to have made, and I had to get there before the news reached any of my competitors. I had with me a special collection of custom-made items for her consideration. If she liked any of the designs I had chosen, I stood to make a sizable profit.

I walked up the gangplank and glanced around the deck, hoping to catch sight of the captain. Two surly-looking men sat huddled together at the stern, but they seemed entirely caught up in some sort of gambling game that they were playing. Not the most attentive crew I had ever seen. Then a third man appeared from the aft cabin. I suspected he might be the captain, as he appeared somewhat less disreputable than the others.

"You be wanting something?" he asked, striding towards me. He was a huge, hairy bear of a man. Not exactly my type, but I was going to sail with him, not screw around with him.

"I'd like to book passage to Mythemna, if you have the space."

"Don't carry passengers," was the gruff reply.

"I'll pay well." Taking two gold coins from my pouch, I held them up so they sparkled in the sunlight.

He raised his thick eyebrows, then stared sharply at the coins. "Might make an exception for that kind of money," he allowed, looking me over with more interest. "Ain't no fancy ship I got. Not the kind of thing the likes of you would be wanting to travel on."

"I'll manage. I'm in a hurry to get to Lesbos."

He studied me for a few more minutes, a frown on his face. I just stood there, trying to look like the sort of man that might impress him. That was pretty difficult, considering my less than average height and too-nice tunic. I had hoped for passage on a more luxurious vessel, and had dressed with that in mind.

I remembered another captain once, long ago, who had scrutinized me in much the same fashion, with just such a doubtful expression on his face. My lips curved up into a slight smile at the long-unvisited memory of Zaytoun, captain and owner of the Sea Jewel. 

Still waiting patiently for an answer, I glanced around the deck. The Princess was pretty much your basic merchant ship, but it wasn't in very good condition. The entire vessel was badly in need of paint, and I could see several patches on the linen sail, even furled as it was on the single mast. Still, it looked as if it could make a fair speed. Under good conditions, the trip should take about ten days. I figured I could put up with the rather rough conditions for that length of time.

I looked back at the captain, raising one eyebrow and smiling as if I were confident of his acceptance. He nodded fractionally, and took the coins from my hand. "Name's Ursus," he said tersely. "Who might you be?"

"Euphonius. I'm a jewelry merchant."

"All right, Euonymous --"

"Uh –- that's Euphonius. Euonymous is a kind of bush."

Ursus frowned at the interruption. I got the definite impression he didn't much care about my name, as long as he had my money. "We sail with the tide," he said before he turned away. "Make sure you're on board."

I was. But I had spent the intervening time shopping for some less expensive clothing, and getting myself a small supply of decent food items to supplement what I expected to be a pretty poor diet aboard the ship. I also invested in a cloak for warmth. It was early spring and although the air was warm, I knew the ocean water was still rather cold, so it was likely to be a chilly voyage.

For the first few days, all went well. Oh, the crew groused a lot, talking about the unusual number of storms lately, and the ships that had been lost. I ignored all that. Sailors are a suspicious and superstitious bunch, always on the lookout for trouble. If it's not there, they'll invent it. Still, I didn't like the way they'd glance out over the sea so often, nor did I care for the worried expression on the captain's face each time a few clouds gathered in the distance.

The two young men who made up the crew earned my dislike almost immediately. They laughed far more than was necessary every time I lost my footing on the rolling deck, and made it very clear that they considered me an over-aged, over-privileged nuisance, and had only refrained from tossing me overboard because the captain forbade it. I quickly learned to avoid them as much as was possible in the cramped confines of a small vessel.

We were six days out from port and roughly in the middle of the Aegean Sea when disaster struck. Until then, we had made fairly good time, but this morning the wind just didn't want to cooperate. I stood aft, not far from the steering oar, looking over the rail. The sea spread out around us, reflecting the dull blue-gray of the angry clouds overhead. The waves flowed in disordered ranks, confused by the fickle wind, which couldn't seem to decide on a direction from which to blow.

Ursus eyed the water with a distrustful eye and I heard him mutter to himself, "Don't like this much at all, I don't."

I pulled my cloak closer around me as I heard the smart slap of a wave against the prow. Spray flew white, splattering us with cold and salty water as a fitful gust of wind carried it over the entire length of the boat. I shivered and thought about going below, but wasn't too sure I wanted to risk being trapped belowdecks if something awful happened.

The storm came up literally out of nowhere. One minute the weather was nasty but not dangerous, and the next a howling gale swept down on us from the north. We were caught entirely unawares, our sail set and vulnerable to the full force of the wind, which caught the sail and rolled the vessel over on its beam ends.

I had the misfortune to be standing at what was now the unexpected leeward rail. Before I knew what was happening, I was covered with water, my grip on the rail torn loose as I was swept overboard. 

I'm not a strong swimmer, but I can keep from drowning if I have to. I struggled to the surface, desperately trying to catch my breath amidst the roiling waves. The water was cold: not that deadly cold that takes your breath away when you hit it, but cold enough to be distinctly uncomfortable. 

My frantic calls for help went unheeded in the face of the gale. No one on the Princess could have rescued me anyway, as the little vessel was now fighting for its own life, riding low in the water, its sail in tatters. Through the blowing spume, I could just see the crew rushing frantically around the deck.

I was barely able to keep afloat. My injured leg hurt from my frantic kicking. Buffeted by whitecaps, I could just about keep my head above the water long enough to breathe. In the confusion of wind, rain, and spray, I thought I heard a deep peal of laughter rumble like distant thunder above the chaos of the storm.

I kept my eyes on the ship as well as I could, still hoping for rescue. Then the sea rose in a bulge of frothing white water. As it grew higher, it took on the form of a huge, bearded man, rising up until only the lower part of his body remained submerged. He held a trident in his left hand and appeared to have a dark crown on his head. His eyes glowed with lambent white fire as he scanned the ocean surrounding him.

Other than his great size, the astounding thing about him was that he seemed to be made up of shining, blue-gray water. Lightning flashed around him, and his cruel laughter echoed above the storm along with the thunder.

My shock-numbed brain could come up with only one name for that terrifying apparition: Poseidon, God of the Seas.

Drawing back his huge hand in a fist, he threatened to hit the ship with a blow that would surely drive it beneath the surface. A small voice came to my ears, barely audible amidst the chaos of sound and storm. "No! Don't!" was what I thought I heard it say.

I narrowed my salt-stung eyes against the wind and made out a human-sized figure in the sea, waving its arms at the Sea God. Undeterred by the wrathful deity, it appeared to be remonstrating with him, gesturing wildly as it struggled to be heard.

Poseidon turned toward his tiny opponent, the scowl deepening on his fluid face, and his eyes glowing brighter.

"Out of my way, puny mortal!" he roared.

But the puny mortal in question refused to move, redoubling its efforts to get between the God and the sinking ship.

Poseidon's watery body turned darker, the blue-gray deepening into the iron gray of the storm clouds above his head. He made a pushing gesture with his free hand, and a huge wave arose from the sea, heading directly at the small creature confronting him, and also, incidentally, heading in my general direction. The unnatural wave towered high over the man in the water, ready to break on top of him. Just before the crest of the wave tumbled forward, I saw him dive.

"I'll deal with you later, insolent little creature!" Poseidon roared as his opponent evaded destruction.

With another sweep of his arm, the vengeful God called up a virtual wall of water, sending it smashing down on top of the Princess. That was the last I was to see of that ill-fated vessel.

Unfortunately, the other wave kept coming at me, its strength unabated by the distance. Just like its original target, I took a deep breath and attempted to avoid the churning mass of white water by diving below it, but it didn't work. I was caught in the undertow, dragged down and flipped head over heels until I was no longer sure which way was up. I tried to fight that deadly current, but I was far too exhausted and weak. My cloak tangled around me and I couldn't even get my feet free to kick. As my lungs begged desperately for air, I had time enough to think it was all over.

Then something grabbed me from behind and jerked me hard backwards. Oh, just great; it wasn't bad enough that I was drowning, but now I was going to be eaten by a shark or some other sea monster. I struggled weakly against the creature, but to no avail. Then I realized that it seemed to be towing me upwards. If I could just hold my breath for a little longer, I might at least get some air before I died. That sounded good, under the circumstances. I stopped fighting. 

My head broke the surface, and I gasped for air, at the same time trying to twist around to confront whatever monster it was that had me in its clutches.

I came face to face with Iolaus. No, that wasn't possible. How could he be here? This had to be an hallucination. Then I caught a quick glimpse of the rest of his body as we were tumbled by another wave, and I knew exactly why he could be here.

I tried to call his name but my voice failed me. I was overtaken by a fit of coughing as I inhaled foam from the crest of another breaking wave.

"It's all right," he assured me. "You'll make it."

Buffeted by waves, choking on water, I yet tried to speak to him. "Is it really you?"

"Who else?" came the jaunty reply, as he grabbed hold of my sodden clothing and pulled me up against him, just before we were knocked down by another breaking wave. While we were underwater, I thought I heard him make some rather strange clicking sounds, but it was hard to be sure, considering the circumstances.

Once we came up, he shifted around so he was behind me, one arm across my chest. "Just relax. I've got you," he said into my ear as he began towing me through the water, heading away from the center of the still-raging storm. 

I'm afraid I wasn't much help. My cloak was tangled around me, and my fingers had grown numb and awkward. Slowly, we made it into calmer water.

I had just about decided I might not die after all when an upright fin cut through the water, heading right at us.

"Shark!!" I screamed, twisting around and grabbing frantically at Iolaus, just about ready to try to climb out of the water by climbing on top of him.

"I know," he replied calmly, evading my grip. "He's just checking us out, not attacking. Don't kick or thrash around." Wrapping his arms around me, he drew me close against the front of his body once again, keeping us both afloat with the slow and gentle motion of his tail. 

I tried my best to overcome my panic, going as limp as I could manage and relaxing the death grip I had around his neck.

"That's it. Stay calm. There's an excellent chance we'll be okay," he said.

"An excellent chance?" I quavered. That didn't sound very encouraging.

"Yeah." His eyes never left the fin, which was still approaching. 

The shark must not have found us particularly toothsome, as it just circled around a bit. I shivered as I saw the creature's black eyes below the surface, but its mouth seemed to be solidly closed. 

Then I saw more fins coming at us. I almost lost it entirely, until I realized from the shape of those fins and the way they moved that they were only dolphins. 

As the newcomers drew nearer, the shark decided not to hang around, much to my relief. One of the dolphins surfaced almost underneath me, pushing me up. Iolaus guided my hands to the dorsal fin, trying to fold my numb fingers around it. 

"Hang on," his voice said in my ear. "They'll tow us."

The dolphin moved forward slowly. Even though I tried to hold on as tightly as I could, my hands began to slip as I was overcome by an encroaching darkness that I couldn't fight off.

I felt arms come around me, and strong fingers covered my own, locking them in place, just before I passed out.

 

I moaned softly and opened my eyes, only to be treated to a most wondrous sight: a beautiful yellow-haired young woman nursing a small baby. Not all that unusual, granted, except that both mother and child seemed to be half fish, from the waist down. As for myself, I was lying in a warm pool of water, so shallow that my bare back rested comfortably on the sandy bottom even as my head was propped up on something hard, perhaps a stone. The warm water, combined with the warmth of the sun on the unsubmerged parts of my body, felt absolutely marvelous.

For those first couple of seconds, the lovely mermaid seemed unaware that I was conscious, so I had a chance to study her without being noticed. She too was reclining in the pool, her babe at her breast. Yes, my first incredible impression had been correct; from just below her navel, she was a fish. No, on second thought, not quite a fish. Her lower half actually looked more like dolphin skin, rather than fish scales. It tapered down to a broad tail, just beyond where her feet should have been, and that tail ran from side to side, not up and down like a fish's would. It seemed to end in two layers of fringy-looking stuff, with the longer fringe in back. It was even bent slightly, at about the point where her knees would be.

Utterly fascinated, I just stared at her. When a hand touched my bare shoulder, I nearly jumped out of my skin.

"Hey, take it easy. You're okay."

I turned to the side and found Iolaus sitting on the rocks next to my head with only the end of his tail trailing into the water. By now I was at least beginning to get used to the idea of mermaids –- uh –- mermen? –- uh –- merfolk? -- or was it merpeople? –- so I could manage to be less astonished at his appearance.

"It is you!" I exclaimed stupidly. "It really is you!"

"Uh-huh," he agreed.

"Never in my wildest dreams did I ever expect to see you again. And I certainly never expected to see your wife and baby!" I looked at the mermaid again, suddenly wondering if I had made an unjustified assumption. "This is Nautica, isn't it?"

I knew full well how he and Nautica had fallen in love, and gone to live together in the sea, with Aphrodite's help. Hercules had told me about it shortly after it had happened. But life goes on and things change. It was within the realm of possibility that he had taken up with some other mermaid by now.

"Oh, yes," Iolaus replied, rescuing me from the possible faux pas. "This is Nautica."

"I never thought I'd meet you either, Euphonius," the lovely mermaid said with a bright smile. "Iolaus has told me all about how the two of you were friends, when he was back on the land."

All about us? Somehow, I doubted that. Or, then again, maybe he had.

"Sometimes it seems that the world is awfully small," I said, making my lips into a gracious smile, "and the circles come around far more tightly than you ever expected. I guess the Fates must get a kick out of doing these things to us poor mortals." I shook my head. "I still can't quite believe it."

I tried to sit up, but it seemed my entire body ached with cold and sluggishness.  
It was about that time that I looked down at myself and realized that my clothing was gone. Except for my loin cloth and the amethyst pendant around my neck, I was essentially naked. However, since neither Iolaus nor his mermaid was wearing even that much, I decided that embarrassment was quite unnecessary.

"Where am I?" I finally got around to asking.

"In our nursery pool," Iolaus replied, gesturing around with one hand. "I figured it would be warm enough to revive you."

I looked around at what he had called their nursery pool. It was a small rocky islet that had what appeared to be a partly artificial pool in the center. The pool was hidden from view by the surrounding rocks, and a partial roof made of carefully arranged driftwood formed a shady section at the other end. The entire islet was far too small to attract the attention of passing ships, if any should pass by.

"Very nice set up," I commented.

"We like it." 

Things got quiet for a moment, as none of us seemed to know what to say next. 

A thousand things ran through my mind as I looked at him, but most of them couldn't be said in front of his wife. I knew full well that anything that had once been between us was long over and done. Even back then, we had basically been friends, not truly lovers in anything beyond a physical sense. I also knew that I had cared a whole lot more for him than he had for me. I had always known that. But still, it was good to see him, and to know he was not only alive and well, but also very happy in his new life.

Iolaus, meanwhile, just sat there, looking at his family with adoring eyes.

Nautica must have picked up on some of my feelings, because when the infant burped and stopped nursing, she glanced over to her husband. "Would you take care of the baby while I go for a swim? I'll see if I can find some food for our guest, now that he's awake." She pulled a large net bag from a niche in the rocks and slung it over one shoulder, blunting the possible discourtesy of leaving so abruptly by adding, "I'm sure you two have a lot to talk about, and I won't be long."

Iolaus took the infant, settling it comfortably against his chest and sliding into the pool, where he submerged far enough so that the baby's lower half was in the water.

So what does one say to someone who just happens to have turned into a merman since the last time you saw him? Well, no matter what else he was, he was obviously a proud parent, judging by the way he was beaming down at the baby in his lap.

"What a beautiful child!" I said with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. I'm not much for children, especially small ones. They're all right, as long as they're someone else's. 

I was rewarded with one of Iolaus' smiles, so I figured I must have said the right thing. Following up on my success, I asked, "Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Oh, a girl, of course. She was born almost three weeks ago. Boys are extremely rare." The smile turned into a frown. "And getting even rarer, in recent generations. Or, at least, that's what Nautica tells me."

I drew the obvious conclusion from what he'd said. "Then there aren't all that many mermen?"

"Nope. Not compared to the mermaids, that is." 

"Does that mean you get more than your fair share of the ladies?" I asked, half-playfully.

"Well, yeah," he admitted, perfectly serious. "When they can find me, that is. We're pretty spread out these days."

I digested that for a moment. "Nautica doesn't mind?"

"Not really. She's lived with this situation all her life and knows it's our only chance to keep from dying out. Besides, she knows I love her and belong to her, in the final analysis. The rest of it doesn't matter."

I looked down at the child again. As I mentioned, I'm not one to go ga-ga over babies, but I did have to admit that this was one very cute kid. A pale blond fuzz was all she had in the way of hair, but her eyes were sky-blue and her baby smile lit up the world the same way her father's did. It was clear that she'd be a real heart breaker when she grew up.

Well, if there were any mermen around by then with hearts waiting to be broken, that is. According to what Iolaus had just told me, perhaps her prospects weren't all too good in the romance department.

And speaking of romance --

My eyes once again traveled over Iolaus' body. Even with a tail, he was still all too attractive to me. Then I caught sight of Nautica's bright blond head, bobbing up and down with the waves as she swam nearby. The mother of his baby. His wife.

I sighed and pushed aside all thought of the things Iolaus and I had done together in the past. Fish or man, he was off limits now.

Yeah, you heard me right: Euphonius, who chases just about anything in pants, or sometimes robes, would draw the line at a married man. I don't do lies and deceit very well, at least not since I ran afoul of Dahok, and felt in my own heart the damage they can do. No matter that I loved Iolaus and wanted him still. He belonged to Nautica now, and I would do nothing to cause them trouble. She might not mind him mating with other mermaids out of necessity, but I doubted she'd take kindly to unnecessary screwing around.

And besides –- how in the name of Eros himself does one make love to someone who's half fish?

I managed to get my mouth in gear once again. "So what's the little one's name?"

"Pearl," he replied, still glowing with pride at my attention to his daughter.

Pearl. The image of a long string of pearls flashed through my mind, wrapped around Iolaus' erect penis, while Ares looked on.

No, no, no! I reminded myself firmly. Forget that! Talk about something else.

"I guess things are going pretty good for you, huh? You've adapted to your new life?"

"Yeah. It gets easier, when you've done it before." He looked down at his lower body with a wry smile. "It was a little –- strange –- at first, though."

All right, my curiosity got the better of me by then.

"I can't help but wonder –- I mean –-" I spread my hands in a helpless gesture, not sure what words I could use. "Well, just how do you and Nautica -- ?"

He laughed. "Don't ask. You really don't want to know, trust me."

I did want to know, but I also didn't want to pry. As I saw Nautica turn back towards the islet, I dutifully changed the subject yet again. "That was Poseidon we saw back there in the water, wasn't it?" Iolaus nodded, no longer looking so happy. "So what's his problem anyway? Why did he sink the ship?" 

"Seems there's been a drastic drop in attendance at his temples lately. No sacrifices, no offerings, that sort of thing. Meanwhile, business has picked up for most of the other Gods, and a few of them have even been teasing him about it."

"I gather he's pretty pissed off, in that case?" 

Iolaus nodded, rocking the baby gently in his arms. Pearl's eyes were beginning to drift closed. "Even under the best of circumstances, Poseidon is an edgy and untrustworthy God, as Gods go," he explained softly. "Like the ocean he rules, he's extremely volatile, and can change in an instant from benign to malevolent. He's been on a rampage lately, causing storms and sinking ships. I wouldn't put it past him to send a tidal wave against some of the seaport towns pretty soon now."

"I don't get it," I said, also quietly, careful not to disturb the drowsing infant. "I mean, I can see why he might be angry, but why isn't he getting the worship that he used to?"

"I'm not sure, but my theory is that so much more is happening on land these days that the importance of the ocean is being overlooked." He had lowered his voice still further, and his baby-rocking became slower. "You know, cities getting bigger, more land under cultivation, better roads. People are turning to Demeter, Artemis, Aphrodite, even Hera, rather than Poseidon."

"Not a real good idea," I said, "considering that Greece is pretty well surrounded by water. Besides, what about all the sea-going folks? I don't think your average sailor is lacking in respect."

"Maybe not, but most sailors aren't exactly rolling in dinars either. They don't earn enough to make the big offerings and hold fancy ceremonies, the way the landsmen can."

"Has anyone tried to explain this to Poseidon?"

Iolaus laughed softly and waved his hand. "Try reasoning with the wind and the waves. You'd probably have more success. He doesn't want to hear it. He's always been jealous of the other Gods anyway, ever since things were divided up between them. Zeus got the earth and Hades got the underworld, but Poseidon was never content with having the ocean as his portion. He's tried to take over parts of the land before, without success."

By now, Nautica had reached the islet and was pulling herself up over the rocks. With a brief glance at the baby sleeping peacefully in her husband's arms, she made herself comfortable next to us, then dug through her carrying bag and held out a large handful of bright green, slippery-looking seaweed in our direction. She unloaded several good-sized fish from the bag also, plus a number of oysters and more seaweed of a different kind.

"Hungry?" Iolaus asked, taking the vegetation and pulling off a chunk.

"Sea lettuce?" I asked warily, digging through my memory for the name of the stuff he was so happily munching on.

"Yeah. It's pretty good. Try it."

Gingerly, I took a small piece in my hand and nibbled on an edge. It wasn't too bad, but it was rather salty.

Salty. That reminded me of just how thirsty I was. "Anything to drink?" I inquired hopefully.

"Oh, sure. We catch rainwater in the pools up on the higher rocks. It's a little awkward for us to reach, but we don't require very much fresh water ourselves. Nautica, would you hold Pearl while I --"

"Stay there," I said quickly. "I can get it myself."

I rose to my feet. My bad leg was stiff, and I felt just a little shaky at first, but as soon as that passed, I stepped up onto the rocks beside the pool and went over to look on top of the higher ones at the far end. Sure enough, there were several small pools of sparkling water easily within my reach.

"Here, use this," Nautica said, holding up a large flat shell. "I'd like a little also, if you don't mind."

I filled the shell and handed it down to her. When she had had enough, I quenched my own thirst, then filled my makeshift cup and brought it back with me to the pool. The rainwater was slightly salty, but not enough to make it dangerous to drink. 

By now, Iolaus had given the baby to her mother and was working on the fish Nautica had caught, carefully filleting them with a bone knife. As I sat down on the rocks at the edge of the pool, most of my body out of the water, the breeze was chilly on my skin. The sun had begun its trek down the western sky. It would be cold once night fell, which made me wonder about my clothes. Belatedly, I recalled the jewelry I had been carrying to Lesbos.

"What happened to the clothing I was wearing?" I asked Iolaus.

"It's spread out on the rocks around the other side of the islet, drying out."

That was good. Hopefully, my cache of jewelry was also safe. 

"I'll go see how it's doing. Not that I don't like your pool, of course, but I'm starting to look like a prune and it's chilly out of the water."

"Okay. Just be careful. Some of those rocks are covered with barnacles."

He wasn't kidding. Careful as I was, I still managed to slice the edge of my foot on one of them. When I reached my clothes, I found they were still too wet to be worth putting on. Much to my relief, the faded neckerchief was laid out in the sun along with everything else. Picking up the knotted and well-worn cloth, I made my way carefully back to the poolside and sat down in a patch of warm sunlight that was pretty well sheltered from the breeze. Until my clothes dried out, that was the best I'd be able to do.

"So why were you at sea in the first place?" Iolaus asked me, still working on the fish.

"The usual," I said with a shrug. "Trying to make a sale."

I told them about the tip I had gotten, and the jewelry Sappho wanted.

"Would you show it to us?" Nautica requested.

"Sure. I'd be glad of some feedback, actually. But bear in mind that these are only cheap models made of pewter. Once the ladies choose the designs they want, I can have them made up with whatever precious metals and gems they prefer."

Carefully untying the knots in the neckerchief, I dumped the small models out onto a conveniently flat rock, then picked them up one at a time, describing each one in turn, then handing it to Nautica, who passed it over to Iolaus.

"This is a symbol often used to represent women," I explained as I held up the first one. "It's supposed to look rather like a hand mirror and is associated with Aphrodite."

As Nautica took it from me, she looked a bit puzzled.

"You've got it upside-down, my dear. Turn it the other way. That's it. See the circle on top, with the cross underneath to act as a handle?"

She nodded, studying it without any great show of enthusiasm. I moved on to the next one.

"Here's a labyrus, a double-sided axe. I know a lot of amazons who favor these as weapons, so I thought it might appeal to some of the more aggressive of Sappho's students."

The mermaid took it also, but hardly spared a glance at this one before giving it to her husband.

Moving on, I held up the most simple of the designs. "This, of course, is the crescent moon." I smiled. "Women are always associated with the moon, for obvious reasons."

"Really?" Nautica said, looking totally puzzled.

Oops! Maybe such considerations didn't apply to mermaids.

"I'll explain it to you later, dear," Iolaus put in.

"All right," she replied equably. Then, to me, pointing to one of the models still lying on the rock, "What's this fat little figure here?"

"It's supposed to represent the power and mystery of women's fertility, and their role as the bearers of life." I shrugged. "Personally, I think it's fat and ill-proportioned to the point of caricature, with those exaggerated breasts and hips, but there are folks who like it."

Nautica took it, but made a face. All right, this was also a loser, for mermaids anyway.

"Now, this is the one that appeals to me the most. It's a stylized orchid, deliberately made to emphasize its resemblance to a woman's –- uh –- lower regions." I glanced at Nautica, then added, "Well, a human woman, anyway. No, I'm sorry, that didn't come out right either. But I'm sure you know what I mean." I turned it around, admiring the detailed workmanship. "Clever, huh? I'm not so sure the ladies of Lesbos will appreciate it, but I think it's both graceful and artistic, even if I'm not a man who greatly admires those –- ah –- nether regions."

I placed the little flower into her hand, then waited until it had reached Iolaus and been returned to me. Spreading them all out on the rock again, I asked, "So what do you think, my dear? Which one is your favorite?"

She didn't hesitate at all before pointing to the crescent moon. "This one. Even if I don't know it's meaning for humans, I love to watch the moon, and the way it changes all the time."

"Interesting. I wonder if the Lesbian ladies will agree with you, or choose something different." I held it up, turning it this way and that. "If they choose this one, I can see lots of possibilities for making it much fancier. A little engraving, some gems set in various places." My eyes still on the crescent, I looked sideways to judge Nautica's reaction.

"Oh yes, that would look lovely." She held out her hand to show the ring she wore. "Maybe some gems like this one? It has the look of moonlight in it."

"Of course it does, my dear. It's a moonstone. But that's an excellent suggestion. I'll definitely keep it in mind." I tried very hard to keep the pang of regret I felt in my heart from showing in my voice. I recognized that ring all too well. I had given it to Iolaus some time ago, after our misadventure with Ares, telling him to save it for the one he would truly love. 

Briefly, the image of the man who had once been the Sovereign's court jester flashed through my mind as I had known him back then, without the tail. 

I looked down at my hands, making a show of gathering up the little pewter figures. I tied them into the faded linen square, then deftly fastened it around my neck so that the knot which held the jewelry was hidden by the larger and looser knot that secured the kerchief in place.

Iolaus watched me closely, then grinned as he inspected the finished effect. "Pretty good hiding place."

"It's an old sailor's trick," I replied with a smile.

He got the joke. I could tell from the smile and the giggle. Hercules must have told him about the old hunter's tricks.

"I didn't know you were a sailor," he said, as he handed me a neatly filleted strip of raw fish wrapped in some kind of seaweed.

I regarded the fish rather dubiously, but took an experimental nibble. Not much chance of starting a fire out here, so I figured I'd best get used to eating whatever merfolks ate, at least for the time being.

"Yeah, I was a sailor. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say that I tried to be. Back in the days of my misspent youth, I wanted to go to sea in the worst way." I shrugged, then made a half-hearted attempt to flex my biceps. "Can you imagine me doing something like that? I was fourteen years oId and was the same height then as I am now, and a whole lot scrawnier. But both my parents were tall and I figured I'd grow in the next couple of years."

"Why did you want to do that anyway? Doesn't seem your style somehow." Iolaus was now working on cracking some oysters with a rock, while Nautica attacked the seaweed-wrapped fish with enthusiasm. Before continuing with my tale, I took another piece and tried to match her enthusiasm, but raw fish isn't a favorite of mine.

"Mostly because I wanted to get out of the small town where I was raised. You know, travel, excitement, that sort of thing. Anyway, no captain in his right mind would hire me, so I did something really stupid. I stowed away on the biggest, fanciest merchant ship I could find. She was called the Sea Jewel, and she was bound for Egypt, so I figured the captain would have no choice about taking me on once we were far from land. Real bright, huh? What actually happened when my presence was discovered was that I ended up being turned over to the crew for fun and games, if you get my meaning."

Nautica nodded sagely. Maybe she wasn't as naïve as she seemed. 

I shrugged. "Well, anyway, it wasn't a whole lot of fun for a boy that young whose experience with men had been rather limited up until then. Nevertheless, I used the situation to my advantage when the captain, an Arab by the name of Zaytoun, took a fancy to me as a bed partner. By the time we reached Egypt, I had learned quite a bit about sailing and navigation, along with a whole lot of other things. Much to my dismay, I discovered that I truly couldn't handle the heavy work, but the navigation part of it made sense to me. I had sharp eyes in those days and was pretty good at climbing, so I made an exceptional lookout. As a result, the captain kept me on for the next couple of years."

Memories flooded back to me from that long-ago time spent at sea. 

"Those were some of the best years of my life. Zaytoun did a good business and was quite rich," I went on, remembering. "He had a fondness for fancy jewelry and baubles of all kinds." I stopped myself abruptly, not sure if I should be mentioning this. Oh, why not? It had happened, hadn't it? I caught Iolaus' eye. "He liked to dress me up in some of his goodies when he made love to me."

I saw his reaction when his eyes widened a fraction, but it was surprise, not fear. Then he smiled a tiny bit and nodded fractionally. He remembered that time with Ares also, and now he knew where I had gotten the idea for what I had done to him.

Nautica, meanwhile, was totally engrossed in the oyster she was eating, so it all went right over her head, as I had hoped it would. She looked up, and prompted "So what happened next?"

"I learned a lot about gemstones and precious metals from Zaytoun, and came to share his interest in them. At any rate, when the ship ran aground one night on an uncharted shoal far from land and sank, I happened to be wearing some of his finery. I also happened to be the only survivor, as far as I know. When I was picked up by a passing ship, I still had on one dangly earring containing several diamonds, and a necklace made of solid gold beads."

I remembered that earring so well. The captain had pierced my left ear himself, so I could wear the more usual gold ring preferred by sailors, but those dangly diamonds had figured in some of our happier nights, as had the gold beads. I sighed. Those were the days, all right.

The sound of Iolaus hammering on a very stubborn oyster brought me back to the present.

"So anyway, I made myself as useful to the crew of the ship that rescued me as I could, but they still decided to put me ashore at their next port of call, which happened to be Kalamai, not far from Sparta." 

I tried one of the raw oysters. Not much better than the raw fish, but I was pretty hungry. 

"So there I was, a scrawny little lad of seventeen years, far from home and with only two things of value to my name: the necklace of gold beads and the diamond earring. By then I had realized I was never going to get any taller, so I reluctantly gave up my hopes for a life at sea. I don't know what I might have done, because I was feeling pretty discouraged and bitter about the entire world just then. I figured I could sell either my jewelry or my body. Since I was pretty attached to the jewelry, for sentimental reasons as much as any other, I was seriously considering the latter choice."

Pearl chose that moment to wake up and begin to fuss. Before she could even get started, Nautica guided her mouth to one of her swollen breasts and the baby began nursing contentedly. "Go on," the mermaid prompted. "What did you do then?"

"I hadn't decided what my future course of action would be when the Gods decided for me. I caught sight of an old lady strolling briskly along the street, wearing a small but expensive-looking blue sapphire pendant on a delicate chain around her neck. She was no taller than I was, only a bit stockier, so I figured her to be an easy mark. 

"Cautiously, I followed her down the street, watching for an opportunity. When she turned into a deserted alley, I was right behind her. Catching up quickly, I took hold of her shoulder and swung her around, grabbing the pendant and pushing her backwards, expecting the chain to break as she fell, which would give me enough time to run away. 

"Much to my surprise, she grabbed my shirt and took me down with her, planting one foot firmly in my stomach and tossing me head over heels as she rolled onto her back. I landed hard, so by the time I was able to breathe again, she was squatting next to me and had my right arm twisted painfully up behind my back.

"What can I tell you?" I held out my open hands in a gesture of helplessness. "I started to cry. She took me to her home, cleaned me up, fed me a good meal, and put me to bed. It turned out she ran the most prosperous and famous School of Dance in Kalamai. That's how I met the Widow Twanky."

"Twanky?" Iolaus put in, his eyes widening in surprise. "Hercules told me a bit about her." Then he frowned. "I'm afraid the Widow Twanky in my world wasn't quite so much of a lady. The only kind of dancing she did was flat on her back. She ran the biggest and fanciest whorehouse in the city."

"Really? Well, this world's version of the Widow was a fine lady indeed. The next morning, we talked. She was the one who gave me the idea of trading in jewelry, and talked me into giving up one of my pieces. I watched as she sold the diamond earring to one of her well-heeled dance students. Then we took the money and bought something else at a good price. As I mentioned, I knew my gems and jewels by then, so I was a fairly knowledgeable trader.

"I stayed with Twanky for the best part of a year, developing my newfound business interests. She even tried to teach me to dance, but that was a hopeless cause. Not only did I trip over my own feet, but I stomped all over hers as well. She did teach me how to deal with customers though, and how to run a business. She also taught me just about everything there is to know about how to make love to a woman, while she was at it."

"I thought you didn't go in for that kind of thing," Iolaus objected.

"Usually I don't. But it depends on the woman. And the Widow Twanky is quite a woman. She gives new meaning to the word ‘lady’. If I were female, I'd want to be just like her.

"Oh."

"I owe her big-time. The Gods alone know what I would have become without her help. Probably some kind of a thief or ne'er-do-well."

By the time I had finished the story, evening had come. We all sat watching the sunset throw fantastic colors across the clouds. Then we settled down to sleep. Iolaus, Nautica, and the baby made themselves comfortable mostly in the water, but I tried to find a soft spot on the rocks. My clothes were still rather damp, but I used them as a cushion below me, and spread my cloak over me to keep off the breeze.

As might be expected, I didn't sleep too well, tossing and turning on the hard and chilly surface. I'm not usually a morning person, but I was very glad to see the sun lift itself above the horizon at long last. I sat up, stretching to work the kinks out of my stiff body. The others were still sound asleep, so I tried to be very quiet as I went to the puddles of rainwater on the high rocks and got myself a drink. Then I climbed up on the rocks, gazing out over the ocean.

The sea was unusually calm, with only small waves lapping against the little islet. There was nothing to disturb them except a gentle breeze, just enough to ripple the smooth surface of the water. 

I scanned the horizon in all directions, hoping to catch sight of land, even if it were far away. Nothing, as far as the eye could see. Well, that wasn't surprising. Shortly before the Princess sank, I had estimated our position to be just about halfway between the mainland of Greece and the Isle of Lesbos. Even with a dolphin towing me, Iolaus and I couldn't have traveled too far from that unfortunate spot. Poseidon had picked just about the worst possible place to sink us.

Or then again, maybe not. It had at least been close enough to where Iolaus lived for him to take notice and try to stop it. If not for that, I'd have surely been dead by now.

I wondered briefly whether Ursus or his crew had been lucky enough to survive. After all, how many life-saving merfolks could there possibly have been in the vicinity? In all honesty, I couldn't bring myself to truly regret their absence, but one has to feel a kind of sorrow whenever another person's life comes to an end, whether or not you liked them. 

I stared pensively out across the sea, where so many people had ended their mortal existence through untold numbers of years. It was so beautiful, and yet so deadly.

As the sun lifted itself higher into the clear blue sky, the water below became even more beautiful.

A field of diamonds, glittering on blue satin.

A billion stars, sparkling in the night of the sea, their hard-edged glimmers blazing with fragments of captured sunshine.

Silver flames, dancing and cavorting across the waves.

I could go on, but I think you get the picture.

I glanced over at the merfolk, still peacefully asleep. There were times when I envied Iolaus and Nautica their life in the sea.

And, of course, I envied Nautica her life with Iolaus. I thought back over the all too short time I had been with him, and how he'd changed from a timid little wimp to a brave man. And then to a merman. I sighed. At least I had had him for a little while, and I'd like to think that I may have helped him find his place in this world, even if he'd left it for yet another sort of world, in the end.

I was still up on the rocks, looking down at the pool, when the baby squirmed and made some small noises. Iolaus awoke. Taking Pearl from where she lay in her mother's arms, he brought her to the far side of the pool, trying to keep her amused and quiet so Nautica would have a chance to sleep for a bit longer. 

I climbed down from the rocks, bringing a shellful of water with me, and sat alongside Iolaus. 

He looked at me strangely, then glanced down at his daughter as he asked softly,  
"Euphonius, that story you told us yesterday?"

"Yeah?"

"That's where you got the idea to dress me up in all that jewelry, when Ares held us captive, isn't it?"

"Uh-huh." I couldn't tell if he was just uncomfortable about what had happened, or angry. "Seemed as good a way as any of stalling for time, in the hopes that Hercules would get there."

"Oh, I'm not mad about it. I suppose it really was a good idea, under the circumstances." He still sounded distinctly uncomfortable. Then he looked up at me and met my eyes. "I got the impression that you liked a lot of what Ares did."

"No. I didn't. I --" He still looked at me, dead on and very seriously. "Okay, I can't claim I didn't find it exciting. But I didn't want to see you hurt," I protested. "I'd have done anything to save you, I just --"

He held up one hand, stopping my outpouring of words. "Don't worry, I'm not blaming you. It was Ares' doing, and Gods are notoriously hard to stop." 

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

"You know, just before he left, Ares mentioned coming after you again."

"Yeah. I remember." I shrugged. "Sometimes I'm not sure whether to wish he would, or hope he doesn't."

Iolaus' face creased into a sharp frown. "If I were you, I'd hope he doesn't. I've had about enough dealings with Gods to last me the rest of my life."

"Aphrodite helped you out, didn't she?"

"Yeah. Guess I could make an exception for her. But Ares –- no way!"

I decided that a change of subject would be prudent. Inclining my head and fixing my gaze on Pearl, I shook my head sorrowfully and said, "I can't help but think how much the Iolaus of this world would have liked to be sitting here with his child in his arms."

"I heard a rumor that he was alive again. Is that true?"

"Oh, yeah. In fact, I ran into him myself, not too long ago. He's fine. He and Hercules are back together again."

Iolaus' delighted smile at the news made my day. But little Pearl had finally reached the limit of her patience and began wailing for her next meal. Nautica woke up, taking the baby in her arms and nursing her. Iolaus scrounged some of yesterday's leftover seaweed out of their pool and we had breakfast.

I saw a strange sparkle come into his eyes as he watched me unenthusiastically eating a piece of sea lettuce. I'd seen that same sparkle before, once or twice. Leaning close to his wife, he whispered something in her ear. Nautica nodded. Pearl had finished nursing, so she handed the baby to Iolaus, who swam over and seated himself alongside me. I could tell he had something on his mind.

"Euphonius, may I ask you a favor?"

"Sure."

"Would you mind baby-sitting for a little while? Nautica and I would really appreciate the chance to go for a swim together."

Seeing the expression in his eyes, and the slight blush that spread over Nautica's face, I put two and two together and got three: one very young baby, and two parents who had had no time by themselves since the birth. 

"No problem. Give her to me. I'm sure we can't get into too much trouble by ourselves."

"Oh, we won't go far. Don't worry. And I'll try to bring back something better to eat than that seaweed," he promised.

"Thanks. I'd like that."

Somewhat tentatively, I took the infant into my arms, cradling it against my chest. I've held babies before, so I knew better than to let its head bobble around. However, this wasn't quite like holding your usual baby. I rather expected her tail and lower half to be cold and slimy, but it wasn't. Instead, it felt like the skin of the dolphin who had helped save my life: smooth, yet tough, and no colder than the rest of the child's body.

Her parents looked at me apprehensively, as if they weren't too sure this was a good idea. Making a shooing motion with one hand, I said, "Go on. We'll be just fine."

Their eyes met. They smiled at each other, then touched their foreheads together and kissed. As gracefully as they could, they maneuvered themselves over the rocks and into the ocean.

I stood up with Pearl and waved to them. "Have fun!"

While they may have been awkward and clumsy on land, in the water it was an entirely different story. I watched them swim side by side, using the same undulating motion as dolphins do. Then I figured I'd better sit down, or I'd soon become an uninvited voyeur to their lovemaking.

Having noticed the way they usually held Pearl so that she was half in the water, I sat on a stone just below the surface of the pool and lowered her gently to my lap, so her tail would be submerged.

The baby blinked a few times, almost as if she were trying to focus her eyes on me in order to figure out who this stranger was, then she squirmed and screwed up her face, getting ready to cry. I jiggled her around and said silly things in an effort to stop her, and then I dipped one hand into the water and flicked a few droplets at her face. She laughed at that, so I did it again. In a few more minutes, we were getting along famously, with her smiling and grabbing for my fingers.

When I accidentally glanced out to sea, I realized I was sitting high enough that I could catch a glimpse of Pearl's parents, if I lifted my head a bit and looked over the rocks. True to their promise, they hadn't gone far, remaining easily within earshot of the islet.

Well, I didn't exactly watch, but I couldn't help it if my head sometimes raised up a little and my eyes inadvertently strayed out over the ocean, could I? After all, they were far enough away and mostly underwater, so I really couldn't see what they were doing in any detail, even if I'd stood up on the rocks and stared at them the entire time. 

About all I could tell is that they did a lot of swimming around, diving and such, and they were always facing towards each other. I concluded that whatever sex organs they had must be on the front of the body. Since I hadn't seen anything even remotely suggesting such a thing when they'd been here and in the pool, I also assumed that any such organs must be pretty much out of sight somewhere, until they were needed. If nothing else, that sort of arrangement would make the merpeople very streamlined in the water.

I was still playing with Pearl when a cold breeze hit my cheek. When I looked up, heavy clouds had covered the sun and were spreading with an unnatural speed from horizon to horizon. The previously gentle waves started to break on the rocks. Lightning split the sky, followed by a loud crack of thunder. The baby began wailing at the top of her lungs, but I could barely hear her in the rising wind.

Before I even had time to worry about them, Nautica and Iolaus appeared in the churning water near the islet.

"What is it? What's going on?" I shouted over the gale.

"I don't know, but I don't like this!"

"Poseidon?" I suggested, recalling that final threat the Sea God had hurled at Iolaus during the shipwreck.

Iolaus pressed his lips together grimly and frowned. The sea boiled violently on the other side of the islet and the Sea God answered my question by appearing in person, a fierce expression on his fluid face. 

This was definitely not good. Not good at all.

I hugged the screaming baby close against my chest, trying to shield her from the chaos. Nautica fought her way over the rocks and into the pool, trying desperately to reach her child, while Iolaus swam around to place himself between the angry God and his family.

"Insolent mortal!" Poseidon bellowed, gesturing at the swimming merman. "Now you pay for interfering in my business!"

A large wave hit Iolaus and washed him hard against one of the outlying rocks, then down into the churning white water. When he surfaced, there was blood on his chest and arms.

The God laughed and lifted his trident above his head. Lightning crackled around the gleaming prongs and thunder roared an echo to his laughter.

Nautica had reached me by that time, taking Pearl and gesturing toward the most protected side of the pool. I followed her, but stood up and looked over the rocks, trying to see what was happening to Iolaus.

The clouds overhead boiled with energy. A long finger of darkness reached down to touch the sea, and I recognized the dread shape of a waterspout forming. In case you've been fortunate enough never to have seen one in person, a waterspout is a sea-going tornado, and it's capable of wreaking the same destruction over the ocean as it does on land.

"You and your family shall be no more!" Poseidon roared.

"No!" Iolaus screamed, now swimming toward the God but at an angle away from the islet. "Your anger is at me! Leave them out of it!"

The waterspout moved toward us, still gaining strength. However, as Iolaus swam sideways, Poseidon turned toward him.

"You will all die, torn to shreds and blown over the sea to feed my fish!" The God's laughter boomed above the hideous noise of the violently twisting waterspout.

I leaned down to Nautica and screamed in her ear, "Get out of here! Quickly!"

"Iolaus --" she objected.

I shook my head violently. "No! You've got to save Pearl! Go!"

She nodded grimly. I helped them both into the water, trying to keep low so as not to distract Poseidon's focus from Iolaus. The waves broke high and hard against the rocks, but once she had reached the water, Nautica moved with incredible swiftness, getting clear of the islet.

She glanced back at me, but I waved her away. Clutching her child tightly against her chest, she dove below the wind-whipped surface and I didn't see them come up anywhere nearby.

The waterspout was still moving towards the islet, but more slowly now. Iolaus and Poseidon shouted at each other, but I could no longer make out the words. I hoped Iolaus had seen his wife and child dive to safety, but I wasn't sure. For a brief moment, I considered following Nautica and trying to swim away, but I knew I wouldn't last very long in the storm-tossed water. I could only cling to the wet and slippery rocks and hope for the best.

Iolaus had lured Poseidon further away, but the God's rage was gathering strength even faster than the waterspout. His blue-gray body had changed to the angry blue-black of a storm cloud, and he shook his trident, sending lightning blazing in all directions across the sky.

Suddenly, the waterspout stopped moving in my direction. Stalling for a moment as if in hesitation, it then turned toward Iolaus, faster and sharper than any natural storm could possibly do.

My heart sank. Iolaus might have been successful in diverting Poseidon's wrath away from his family, but now he himself would die. And I could do nothing but watch helplessly, and hope I wouldn't be next.

There had to be something I could do, someone who could help us. But the only hero I knew with anything like that kind of strength was Hercules, and he was not here. Who else could possibly stop a powerful God like Poseidon?

Then it hit me: only another God –- or Goddess. And hadn't Aphrodite helped Iolaus before? After all, she was rumored to have a soft spot in her heart for Iolaus, in either of his incarnations.

I squeezed my eyes shut and fixed my mind on the image of the Goddess of Love and Beauty, as I had seen her represented in the statue in her temple in Corinth: lovely face, long golden tresses, not much in the way of clothing, but a body that even a man such as myself couldn't help but admire.

"Sweet Aphrodite, hear my prayer! Iolaus needs your help! Please come! Oh, please!" 

I went on in this manner for what seemed to me to be forever but was probably just a few moments. Then, in a poof of rose-pink sparkles and hearts, someone who could only be the Goddess herself materialized on the rocks beside me.

Taking a quick glance at the storm-tossed chaos surrounding her, she frowned and grabbed for her blowing hair. "Eew! Icky!" she said as she turned to me and looked me up and down. "Who's responsible for this major bad hair day, Cutie? And where's my little Curly and that danger that you were hollering about?"

Cutie? Me? Oh well, I've been called worse.

"Curly –- uh –- I mean, Iolaus –- is over there. And Poseidon's about to splatter him across the sea."

"Oh, he is, is he? I don't think so!"

Next thing I knew, the scantily-clad fluff of a Goddess reappeared between Poseidon and Iolaus, towering fully as high as the Sea God himself and glowing with a bright pink aura of energy.

"Stop it, Uncle Posie! Stop it right now!" she scolded, shaking a delicate finger in the surprised God's face. "You leave Curly out of this. He's my friend."

"But, Dite, he --"

"I don't care what he did. I won't let you hurt him." She held out one beautiful hand, ostentatiously inspecting her fingernails. "Unless you want all of your friendly little sea nymphs to forget what love means, that is."

"You wouldn't?!"

She put her hands on her hips and stared angrily at Poseidon. "You harm one hair on my Curly's head, and I'll show you what I'll do!"

Poseidon harrumphed loudly. The waterspout backed up a bit. I started breathing again.

"But Dite, these mortals need to be taught a lesson. They're not showing me the proper respect anymore. They need to learn to fear my power."

"I know, Uncle," she crooned sympathetically. "Things haven't been going so good for you, have they? But killing the mortals won't help." She shrugged prettily. "I mean, a dead mortal offers no sacrifices, ya know?"

Poseidon shook his fist. "They aren't offering me enough sacrifices now anyway! I'm sinking more ships than ever and calling up more storms, but do they notice? Do they even care?"

By now, Iolaus had swum over into the calmer water surrounding Aphrodite.

"They care!" he called up to the two Olympians. "It's not that the sailors fail to honor you, but there are more land-dwellers nowadays, so they're outnumbered. And those landlubbers have other interests and other Gods."

Poseidon glared down at him. "Even the sailors don't honor me. I'm tired of this. I'll teach them a lesson they won't forget!"

"Even if you kill us all?" Iolaus replied. "It isn't really the lack of sacrifices that's infuriating you, is it? It's something more important than that."

Poseidon inclined his head and stared hard at the merman. Undaunted, Iolaus went on, "I think I hear you saying that what you want isn't really the grand offerings of temples, right? You don't need temples. What are they except buildings on the solid ground? Of what use to you is the devotion of a bunch of cowardly landlubbers? No, you need the respect of the gallant men who go down to the sea in ships. You want worship from the ones who deal with you on a daily basis, plying the majestic oceans for a living and risking their lives each time they sail out from port. But isn't the risk of their lives precisely the proper sort of honor to pay to a great God such as yourself?"

Iolaus was pouring it on a little thick here, but it seemed to be working. Poseidon stroked his beard vainly and nodded in agreement. "Go on."

"Your true followers love the sea," Iolaus said, warming to his topic, "just as they love you, despite the dangers. But when do they have time to hang out in temples, when they're always at sea? What greater sacrifice could you ask than the constant risk of their own lives, each time they set sail into unknown dangers? They love the wind in their hair and the stars in the rigging; the play of sunlight on the waves and the smell of the salt water in the early spring; the --"

"Enough!" Poseidon bellowed, gesturing at the whirling funnel of water beside him. "It's clear that you could spout poetry for as long as I could spout water."

Aphrodite gave a little laugh at that, but the most Iolaus dared was a tentative smile. 

"Granted that all you've said is true," the Sea God went on, preening a little, "they still aren't showing me any particular honor by sailing around on their puny ships. How do I know they really want to serve me?"

The merman seemed at a loss for words, and Poseidon's brow furrowed into the beginning of a frown.

"What if your followers wore something special," Iolaus began hesitantly, "or just carried it on their person? Something that was sacred to you and was meant to show you honor? It would be a symbol of each man's respect and a token of his devotion."

Poseidon nodded. He seemed to be buying it. "What sort of thing did you have in mind?"

"How about a precious gem of some kind?"

"Yeah," he said thoughtfully. "Something really fancy. Like a diamond, for the sparkle of the sun on my waves. Or a sapphire, for the deep blue of my ocean?"

"Uh –- trouble is, most seamen can't afford that sort of gem," the merman suggested.

"You mean I'm not worthy of the best?" Thunder rumbled in the distance.

"Of course you are! But your true followers are simple sailors, not rich landowners and merchants. There must be some kind of gem that would be suitable." He glanced over to me. This was obviously my cue.

Poseidon didn't look too pleased. The thunder grew louder as he face darkened.

"I've got an idea!" I shouted, hoping to be heard above the pounding surf and blowing wind. They all turned to me, and I wondered briefly if I should've kept my big mouth shut.

I swallowed hard and cleared my throat, preparing to scream again, but suddenly Poseidon waved his hand and the wind dropped to nothing, while the sea became flat calm around us, even though the waterspout continued to spin like a threatening top not very far away. The sudden silence was almost more ominous than the storm had been.

Poseidon stared hard at me, as if he had just now noticed my presence. Then he reached down with one giant hand, grabbed me around the waist, and lifted me up to his face to study me more closely.

If anything, the Sea God was even more frightening when seen up close. The glowing eyes were fully as large as my entire head, and the watery surface of his face shifted color alarmingly. Being up so high in the air wasn't a lot of fun either, especially since my legs were left dangling over nothing, while his fingers encircled my torso in a damp embrace. I'd probably have pissed in my pants, had I been wearing any.

"So what do you suggest?" Poseidon asked. 

Good question. It was hard to think in this position, but I did my best, sorting through the catalog of precious gems in my head. Then it came to me.

"An amethyst." I groped for the chain around my neck, with the large and nicely cut amethyst in its gold setting. Holding the pendant up in front of me and hoping the God had good enough sight in those awful eyes to see it, I waxed rhapsodic over the virtues of my chosen gem. "Pale purple for the morning mist over the sea, or deeper purple for the soft glow of the water beneath a sunset sky. Well-off captains and ship owners could have fancy, gem-cut stones such as this, while your ordinary sailor could easily afford a simple chunk of the crystal strung on a bit of leather around his neck or carried in his pocket. Let it be known that you're likely to show favor to the seaman who has one, preserving him from danger and guiding him to a safe harbor."

Aphrodite, still in her giant-size form, chose that moment to get into the conversation. Moving over by her Olympian uncle, she inspected the amethyst. "Ohh," she cooed. "I think it's lovely. Such a nice clear color." Fluttering her eyelashes prettily at Poseidon, she exclaimed, "Kewl!"

The Sea God brought me closer to his face, squinting at the pendant. Then I saw the focus of those watery eyes come back to me. "I like the way you think, little man, and I'm going to give your idea a try. But if it doesn't work --" He frowned blackly. Thunder and lightning once again blazed around us.

"It'll work, it'll work!" I hastened to assure him. "Just give your priests a chance to get the word out, and every sailor who's worth his salt will be wearing an amethyst." I looked down, suppressing a qualm of nausea at the expanse of open air between my feet and the sea, as I shouted to the merman below me, "Don't you agree, Iolaus?"

"Oh yeah! Definitely!" he called up to us. I saw Nautica surface next to him, holding Pearl, and breathed a sigh of relief at knowing they were safe.

Poseidon directed an angry glare at the little family, and for a moment I was afraid they weren't so safe after all.

"And as for you," the God began, shaking his trident at the merfolk. I held my breath again. "Next time, think well before interfering in the affairs of the Gods. Got that?"

"Yes, sir!" Iolaus replied, as he and Nautica both nodded so hard their bodies rocked back and forth in the water. They were clearly overjoyed at getting off so easily.

Poseidon lowered his hand down next to the islet and let me go. I stepped onto solid ground, somewhat dizzy from the rapid descent. He snapped his fingers and the waterspout evaporated. Then the God of the Sea sank into the water and was gone.

I just stared in dazed astonishment at the suddenly quiet ocean, as Iolaus and Nautica swam over. Iolaus helped his wife out of the water so that she was sitting on one of the rocks, her tail washed by the gentle waves. Pearl cuddled closer in her arms, looking out at the world with wide blue eyes. She seemed uncertain whether to laugh or cry, until Nautica offered her a breast and she began suckling contentedly.

Aphrodite appeared beside me, once more back to her normal size. At least I assumed it to be normal. With a Goddess, who can know?

"Way to go, Cutie!" she exclaimed, planting a big kiss on my cheek. "Old Posie doesn't generally pay much attention to mortals' ideas. I thought he was about to squash you flatter than an oyster, there for a minute."

I rubbed my cheek where she had kissed me. "Uh –- thanks. I think."

"Dite?" Iolaus called up from the water. "Since you're here anyway, maybe you'd do us a small favor?"

"For you, Curly, anything." Then she noticed the lacerations on his chest and arms from being flung against the rocks earlier. "Yuck! You're a mess!" Tossing some sparkling bright pink hearts and flowers his way, she giggled happily. "There. All better."

"Thanks, Dite," he replied. "But that wasn't exactly what I had in mind. Euphonius was on his way to Mythemna when Poseidon sank his ship, so perhaps --"

"Mythemna, on Lesbos?" the Goddess interrupted, making a face. "Icky! Why would anyone want to go there? Especially a man?"

"I'm hoping to sell them some jewelry --"

Her face lit up. "Jewelry? Anything real pretty and dainty? Pearls? Diamonds?"

"I'm afraid not. Nothing that would be anywhere near worthy of your beauty, my dear." I was starting to get into the spirit of it now. "However, if you take me to Lesbos, I'll be sure to make you a very special offering once I return to the mainland. Something I know you'll absolutely adore."

"Groovy! Anything in pink?"

She would ask for that. I thought fast. "Let's see now, there aren't a whole lot of pink gemstones. Water opals are nice, but they show a variety of pastel colors, not just pink."

Nope, not a winner, judging by her face. I've had years of experience in figuring out if a woman likes what I'm trying to sell her. You can see it in the eyes, and the way their lips part just a little when something strikes their fancy.

"Then again, there's always tourmaline, which comes in all sorts of colors," I suggested. "It's most often pink and green, and you can even get them both in one jewel. Makes for a stunning effect, if it's done right."

Also not a winner, although this suggestion had more appeal than the last. I scrunched up my face and made a show of trying to come up with something else, before I brought up the one I had had in mind all along.

"Got it!" I exclaimed. "Rubies! Most of them are deep red, but they can also be found in various shades of pink." I glanced her way, looking hopeful. Yep, got her this time. I went on with even more enthusiasm. "I see you in a delicate necklace of pink rubies set in a mesh of fine gold chain so that they form the pattern of a scallop shell that would hang just above the swell of your lovely bosom. This would be set off by a pair of earrings, each made up of a ruby in the center of a small gold shell." I gave the Goddess my best smile, the one that was guaranteed to clinch a sale with my female customers. Sure enough, her eyes sparkled with delight. "Well, what do you think? Worth a little trip to Lesbos?"

"Oh," she cooed, moving closer alongside me and playing with my hair. "You really know how to please a girl, don't you?"

"Uh –- yeah, I guess." This was working just a little too well. Too bad I'm not more of a fan of feminine beauty. This lady was impressive, for sure. "So about that trip to Lesbos?"

"Cutie, you're on your way."

Then I realized how little I was wearing. "Wait a minute! I've got to get my clothes on." I grinned. "Lesbos isn't exactly the place for a man to arrive naked, huh?"

"You got that right." She shook her head in puzzlement. "A whole bunch of women, without any men. I just don't get it."

As I went to gather up my clothes, Iolaus surprised me by saying to her, "Don't knock it if you haven't tried it. Who knows? Might be fun."

Much to my disgust, my clothing had gotten wet all over again during the confrontation with Poseidon. Nevertheless, I tried to struggle into my soaking pants and tunic as best I could, while they continued the conversation.

"You really think so, Sweetcheeks?"

"Uh-huh."

The Goddess gave a careless little shrug of her shoulders and her nose crinkled as she frowned slightly. "Not really my thing. But then again, you're right; I've never tried it." Suddenly the rather vapid expression turned thoughtful. "Hey, maybe I will. Been getting a bit stale lately in the variety department."

I was so surprised by her response that I dropped the soggy boot I was trying to pull on. 

Then she turned to me and made a face. "Eew! You look like a drowned rat." She gave a dainty wave of her hand. "There. All dry."

I found myself not only dry, but fully dressed in an elegant but tasteful brown velvet robe. "Thank you! I love it!"

Linking her arm through mine, she went on, "Come on, Cutie. Not only will I send you to Lesbos, I'll escort you there myself."

In a shimmer of pink sparkles, we started to disappear. I barely had time to wave good-bye before we were gone completely, but the picture of Iolaus, Nautica, and Pearl, all smiling happily, engraved itself forever on my memory.

 

And no, I'm not going to tell you what Aphrodite did on Lesbos. A man's got to be crazy to start gossip about the Goddess of Love. But I will say she enjoyed her time on the island. And as for me, do I really need to mention that I got an impressive and extremely profitable order of jewelry from the Lesbian ladies? Amazing what the presence of a Goddess can do for you in a place like that!


	8. RESOLUTIONS

RESOLUTIONS

 

Things got pretty bad there for a while, what with drought, famine, flood, plague, and even more armed skirmishes than were usual. Quite a few folks went totally hysterical, claiming the end of the world was at hand and other such foolishness. Me, I just sat tight and waited it out, figuring there was little else to do, and my household and I would either survive or we wouldn't. 

As it turned out, we made it. But the jewelry business had been hard hit by all these disasters, so I was hurting financially, if not in other ways. Just a couple of days after the world seemed to have stabilized again, I bid my housekeeper and her daughter good-bye and set out for Corinth, hoping to sell a few items at the marketplace and maybe even some of my more expensive pieces to the courtesans at King Iphicles' palace.

Unfortunately, I didn't reach the city the following day as planned. I suppose I should have realized that the recent social and economic disruptions would result in an increased number of brigands ready to prey on travelers, but I'd never had any truly serious problems of that sort before, so it wasn't in the forefront of my mind as I rode along. Besides, I always took precautions against losing my merchandise to thieves. 

It was windy and rather chilly that day, so I had my brown wool cloak wrapped close around me. I'd made very poor time because some of the roads were still in bad condition, but I was eagerly looking forward to a warm bed and a hot supper at an inn in the village I knew lay only about five more kilometers further on. It was late in the afternoon and the sky had been clouding over rapidly. I was just wondering if I should kick my horse into a gallop, in hopes of making it to the village before the rain began, when I found myself suddenly confronted by a group of men standing in the road, fierce scowls on their faces. One held a bow and arrow, while the others had their swords in hand.

If I'd had any lingering doubts about their intentions, they were quickly dispelled when one of the men grabbed the reins of my horse and ordered, "Dismount. Now!"

As usual, when confronted with this sort of challenge, I complied hurriedly. This wasn't the first time such a thing had happened, so I wasn't terribly worried.

Holding my hands open to show that I was unarmed and essentially harmless, I gave them my most winning smile. "I'm afraid you'll get little of value from me, gentlemen. I'm just a simple traveler, on my way to visit friends in Corinth."

The apparent leader of the group, a disreputable-looking rogue wearing an ill-matched and filthy assortment of worn leather armor, favored me with a sneering grin as he said, "You can stop the act now. We know you're that jewelry merchant from Lydicea, Euboulos."

"No, Euboulos writes poetry," I corrected gently. "You've got the wrong man. My name's Euphonius."

He shrugged, the point of his sword never wavering from the center of my chest. "So maybe I got the name wrong, but you're still the merchant."

Being recognized wasn't good, but I continued on with my usual tactics. Feigning more fear than I actually felt, I took the pouch from my belt and held it out to him. "Here. Take this if you must, but please leave me alone. It's all I have."

The bandit emptied the contents of the pouch into his hand, barely glancing at the coins and the collection of inexpensive but gaudy rings and necklaces I always carry in plain sight. I was just hoping they wouldn't steal my horse also. I wasn't up for walking the rest of the way to the village.

By now, one of the others had taken the bedroll and saddlebags off my horse and was digging greedily through my belongings, scattering my spare clothes and other travel supplies around him as he did so. Even under such circumstances, I couldn't help but notice that he was the best-looking one of the entire bunch, comparatively speaking.

"Nothing in here, Lycus," Handsome reported to the leader with disgust. "Just clothes, food, and some herbs."

"Hey, be careful with that!" I protested, as he dumped one of the packets on the ground. "It's my favorite tea."

Actually, it was no such thing. I had just purchased the collection of medicinal herbs and without the little papers on which I had carefully written names and instructions for use, I had no idea which was for what. I simply wished to distract them.

My attention was brought quickly back to Lycus when he backhanded me across the face hard enough to split my lip. "Shut up! I want the rest of your jewelry, and I want it now."

Beginning to get just a bit worried but still determined not to lose my most valuable merchandise, I made a show of wiping my hand across my mouth and staring wide-eyed at the blood. Then I pulled a blue topaz ring off my finger, slid the heavy silver bracelet down over my hand, and took off the amethyst pendant around my neck, offering all three items to my assailant. 

"Here. Take it all. Just don't hurt me," I begged abjectly.

This was usually all it took to convince the usual run of brigands that they had cleaned me out, but Lycus barely glanced at what I had given him.

"Where's the real stuff, merchant? I know gems, and I know your reputation. You've got more than this, and I want it."

Apparently, the man had a lot more upstairs than his appearance would indicate. Of course I had more; I always did. All of my really expensive items were well hidden in various places on my person or with my travel supplies. This was the first time someone had failed to be taken in by my regular ploys. It occurred to me that I could be in real trouble. Nevertheless, I wasn't about to concede defeat just yet. I still thought I could beat these thugs at their own game.

"I don't have anything else. I lost everything in the flood. If you know I'm from Lydicea, you know how bad things were there just a week ago. It was terrible! My home, my belongings, all gone. This is all I have left. Please, leave me something! I'm trying to start over again. You can't take it all. Please!"

By now I was on my knees in front of the outlaw leader, tears running down my cheeks as I babbled on about the supposed disaster that had overtaken my village. What can I say? I'm a fairly good actor, when I have to be. Yeah, it's pretty undignified, but it's also pretty undignified to lose all your merchandise to a band of thieves.

"Shut up and stand up," Lycus growled disgustedly. "Search him," he commanded his cronies.

One of the ruffians grabbed my arms and pulled them behind my back, while another pawed through my clothing and ran his filthy hands over my body, grinning with a grotesque and toothless smile. I stood there, totally unresisting.

"Nothing, boss," Toothless said at last. "Maybe he's telling the truth?"

"Yeah. And maybe he's not." Lycus stepped up closer to me, sheathing his sword. "Where is it, merchant?" His hand reached down and grabbed my genitals hard enough to make me grimace. "Tell me. Or we'll search you in places you won't like to be searched."

I still thought I could bluff this through. Looking him in the eye, I smiled sweetly. "How do you know I wouldn't like that?"

"If I do it, little man, you won't enjoy it. Trust me."

I smiled wider and thrust my hips forward against his hand, all the while measuring the distance to my horse, who had wandered down the road a short way. "Maybe I like it rough."

"And maybe we could search him a whole lot better if we took his clothes off," Toothless suggested, leering.

"Yeah," concurred the thug behind me, relaxing his grip on my arms.

Lycus stripped off my cloak and tossed it aside, reaching for the laces at the neck of my tunic. I continued to smile, but allowed a bit of fear to show in my eyes, even as I realized sickly that the fear was more than pretense at this point. 

He seemed to like that. Trailing grimy fingers across the side of my face, he asked mockingly, "Not so sure after all, are you, merchant?"

"Please, no --" I began, sagging as if my knees were about to give way. I shifted, pulling my hands free with one savage jerk, and twisted, driving an elbow into his midsection. Then I took off down the road, hoping to reach my horse. I may not be much of a fighter, but I can run pretty fast for a man my age.

"Stop him!" someone yelled.

I had ahold of the saddle and was raising my foot to the stirrup when I heard the twang of a bowstring. My left leg gave out and I went sprawling in the dust.

My terrified horse galloped away. I clutched at my leg, where blood was already seeping out around the arrow sticking all the way through my calf. It hadn't started to hurt yet, but I knew I'd feel it any second now. I looked up at the angry faces glaring down at me. "Can't blame a man for trying, can you?" I said hopefully.

Lycus grabbed a handful of my hair, pulling my head back and pressing the tip of a dagger against my throat. "I'm going to search you the hard way, merchant. I'm going to slice you into very small pieces, very slowly. If you're hiding any more jewelry, I'll find it. If not, I'll enjoy hearing you scream." He glanced at the others and ordered, "Hold him down."

I cried out in pain as they pushed me forward and my weight came down on my injured leg. Then my leg collapsed and I rapidly found myself pinned face down in the dust of the road. By now, giving up my entire stock of jewelry seemed like a good option. I should have done it long ago. I spit out the dirt that filled my mouth and was about to tell them that slicing me up wasn't necessary when I heard a voice shout, "Leave him alone!"

I knew the voice, and I knew the man it belonged to. I looked around to find Hercules standing in the road, holding one of the brigands up by the back of the neck. He tossed the man negligently into the bushes as the rest turned and charged at him.

Lycus had evidently forgotten about me as he ran after the others. I tried to drag myself away from the action, but the arrow in my leg made it rather difficult, not to mention very painful, to move.

Glancing hastily back over my shoulder, I saw Iolaus jump out of the bushes and fling himself into the melee. I'm afraid I merely stared at him for a long moment, as he and Hercules wreaked havoc among the brigands. Iolaus was long dead. I knew that. I had read all about what happened in Sumeria almost two years ago. I couldn't believe I was seeing him now. Either I had gone plumb crazy, or he was somehow alive.

But maybe he wouldn't be for long, considering the odds. He was clearly trying to get over to Hercules, but hadn't made it. Surrounded by opponents, he was still managing to hold them off despite being badly outnumbered. The most dangerous-looking of his attackers was a tall man with a patch covering his left eye. Pulling my knife from my boot, I threw it at him. As much by luck as by skill, my dagger embedded itself in Eyepatch's thigh, taking one ruffian out of the fight.

Dragging myself painfully along on hands and knees, I tried to crawl further from danger, even as I looked around quickly. Not far from me, the bowman who had downed me nocked an arrow and aimed for Iolaus, whose back was now toward us. 

Coming up on my good leg, I threw myself at the bow just as the archer released the string. The arrow thunked into a treetrunk not far from Iolaus' head, even as I hit the ground and screamed in pain. But I still held the bow in one hand, preventing the archer from shooting again. He kicked at me, but I kept my grip. We struggled for possession of the bow as the archer drew his dagger. 

Hercules must have seen my peril, because I heard him shout from somewhere behind me, "Iolaus, over there! Quick!"

By the time I had dodged the dagger a couple of times, my two rescuers were standing over me, back to back and fending off the rest of the bandits. Hercules' attention was focused on his opponents, but Iolaus glanced down at me. For just a moment, he froze, surprise showing in his eyes. "Euphonius?" he said, hesitating momentarily, a strange look on his face.

Toothless took advantage of that hesitation to jab his sword into Hercules' undefended back. The big man staggered forward a few steps, then fell down on his knees, while Iolaus' eyes went wide with shock. The blue eyes narrowed and a terrible look came over his face, not very different from the rage I had sometimes seen when Dahok had been in control of his body. 

Hercules pushed himself up on his hands, his eyes seeking and then looking past his partner. From my vantage point on the ground, I could also see Toothless drawing back his sword behind Iolaus' back.

"Iolaus, watch out!" the dem-iGod gasped faintly.

Almost too late, the blond warrior twisted and sidestepped. The heavy blade missed its target, but the point caught him on the upper arm. Undeterred, Iolaus raised his broadsword, continuing his turn. He sliced across and down into his opponent's shoulder hard enough to almost severe the man's head from his body.

Everything got very quiet as the corpse fell to the ground, blood spurting from the gaping wound. Then the bandits surged forward, screaming their outrage. Iolaus fought like a small but manic whirlwind, despite the blood running down his arm.

I crawled over to Hercules, who had once again collapsed forward onto his face, struggling to breathe. I ripped his shirt open, fearful of what I would see. As he took a breath, the raw edges of the wound pulled in. When he breathed out, bloody froth bubbled out. I had seen such injuries before, and I knew how dangerous they could be. I could only think of one thing to do. Pressing the palm of my hand over the wound, I kept it tightly covered, preventing any more air from being sucked in.

As his breathing eased, the demi-God lifted his head once again and looked around. Seeing Iolaus on his own, he tried to raise himself up, gasping, "Got to help --"

"No, don't even try. Iolaus has it under control."

I pushed him back down, the mere fact that I was able to do so testifying to how badly he was hurt. He turned his face to me and studied me, blinking his eyes. "Euphonius?" Then he got this kind of disconcerted look on his face, as if he'd just suddenly recalled what we'd done the last time we'd met. His eyes flickered down to the arrow in my leg. 

The wound wasn't bleeding much, but his bringing it to the forefront of my attention only made me realize how badly it hurt. With my attention split between taking care of Hercules and keeping a cautious eye on the battle raging around us, I couldn't spend too much time watching Iolaus. However, from what little I saw, he was fighting like a berserker, single-handedly keeping all the bandits away from us. How one man could possibly hold off so many opponents at once, I had no idea. I was just grateful that he was able to do it, or Hercules and I would have been dead meat for sure.

Perhaps the earlier death of Toothless had taken some of the heart out of our assailants. When Iolaus laid open a gash on Lycus' head, the outlaw leader fell to the ground, screaming for someone to come and get him and then for them to break off the attack.

I breathed a sigh of relief as they scattered in all directions, but was chagrined to notice that one of them mounted my horse and galloped down the road.

As soon as he was certain that the bandits were truly gone, Iolaus rushed over to us and dropped to his knees beside Hercules. Blood still ran down his left arm and dripped into the dirt from a long gash that went most of the way from his shoulder to his elbow, but he seemed unaware of his own injury, in his concern for his partner.

"Herc?" he asked tentatively, the wildness of battle slowly seeping out of his eyes.

"I'm –- okay," the demi-God managed to answer, between labored breaths.

Thus assured, Iolaus calmed down enough to assess the situation, quickly taking in my hand on the wound in the other man's back, the arrow through my leg, and the blood still running from his own arm.

With my free hand, I pulled a scarf from inside my tunic and held it out to him. "Here. You've got to stop your arm from bleeding before you can help us."

Iolaus took the offered bandage, pressing the scarf tightly against his arm, and instructing me tersely, "Keep pressure on Herc's wound when he breathes in, but lift the edge of your hand just a little when he breathes out, so some of the air will escape."

I did as I was told, suggesting, "I have some spare clothing in my bedroll. We can use it for bandages. I've also got some medicinal herbs and stuff, if the bandits didn't trash them all."

Iolaus nodded quickly, then stood up and salvaged my saddlebags, bedroll, cloak, and various other items out of the mess on the road. Using his teeth and his injured arm, he ripped up a white linen shirt into strips.

I took the fabric from his hand. "Come here. Let me help you tie that scarf around your arm, so you have both hands free."

Squatting down, we managed to secure the makeshift bandage, using one hand apiece. "This needs stitches," I told him. 

"Later. We've got to see to Herc." He rummaged through the saddlebags rapidly, looking for the herbs I had mentioned.

Opening one pouch, he sniffed tentatively at it, then discarded it and sampled another. "This smells like Huang Tu Tang. Stops bleeding." He opened a ceramic jar, dipped his finger into the paste, and smelled and tasted it. "And this is Ju Muu Tsay, good for keeping wounds from going bad and for bringing down fever." His face brightened. "Pretty good stuff." Next, he pulled out a small glass vial. Before I could say anything, he had opened the stopper and sniffed. "Lavender oil?"

"Yeah. Real concentrated." I smiled apologetically. "I'm afraid that won't be much help right now. Those two other things with the strange names are all I've got in the way of healing herbs."

"That's okay. They'll do fine." 

Frowning slightly, he watched Hercules' uneven efforts to breathe. Very little air was escaping now when the demi-God exhaled. "We need something that will stop –- Oh, I know!" He ripped one of the leather knee patches off his pants, smeared some of the paste and powder on one side of it, and then moved over closer to me. "Okay, on his next exhale, lift your hand. I'll use this. We can bandage it on real tight."

By the time we had finished, the big man was sitting up and looking a bit more alert, but he was far from well. Pale and weak, at least he was conscious.

Iolaus nodded in satisfaction, then turned his attention to me. "Let's take a look at your leg now."

That's when the lowering clouds above us ran out of patience and began to rain. It was only a smattering of drops to begin with, but it promised to get worse pretty quickly. The wind picked up, stirring and swirling the dust on the road.

Iolaus glanced up at the sky and frowned, then turned his attention back to my leg.

I had been trying to ignore the arrow, telling myself that it didn't hurt all that much, if I managed not to bump it against anything. 

"Turn over a little so I can see the wound," he said gently.

I did, at the same time looking fearfully back over my shoulder. He carefully tore the fabric of my pants and touched the shaft of the arrow. I sucked my lower lip between my teeth and tried to keep quiet, as he broke the feathered end off. 

"Pull it out," I said, making an effort to sound brave. 

He looked at me somewhat doubtfully. "This is gonna hurt."

There was really no way around this and I knew it, but I didn't have to be a wimp about it, especially in front of him. "Just do it." 

"Herc, can you help me here?"

The demi-God nodded. Gesturing for me to come within his reach, he took hold of my leg with both hands, one above and one below the arrow. 

I closed my eyes, clenched my fists, and clamped my teeth together, determined not to scream or struggle. When Iolaus pulled the arrow through, I managed the first part, but not the second. Fortunately, you don't move much when Hercules has ahold of you.

The process of being cleaned up and bandaged was almost a relief after that. As Iolaus applied some of the salve and wrapped my leg with more strips of torn linen, I glanced at him once or twice. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but I didn't know if he even wanted to listen. His eyes looked strange, almost shadowed. Maybe he'd changed, after that encounter with Dahok. Or maybe he'd never even known what went on between me and the creature Dahok had made of him. Or maybe he was doing his best to forget about it. 

Or maybe he didn't really want to see me again at all. During those first moments of recognition, it hadn't exactly been unadulterated joy that I'd seen in his expression. Of course, that didn't prove anything. We'd been in the middle of a fight, after all.

Come to think of it, how was it that he was alive at all?

I never had the chance to ask him anything, as the rain began in earnest, with a little thunder thrown in for good measure. The drops were large and cold.

Iolaus frowned once more at the uncooperative weather and studied the sky. "We've got to find shelter. It's likely to get worse before it gets better."

He was all too right. Between the cold raindrops and the aftereffects of pain and fear, I was already shivering violently. Hercules, demi-God or no, didn't look real good either.

"I saw a cave a short way back," Iolaus suggested. "That's our best bet." 

"I don't think I can walk." 

"Sitting here in this storm isn't exactly an option. It's going to get even colder during the night." He looked at Hercules. "Can you make it, buddy?"

The big man nodded, but said nothing.

Iolaus got to his feet, his wet hair plastered to his head and straggling limply across his face. "Let me see if I can find you something to lean on," he told me.

He was back quickly with a solid tree branch, the limbs hacked off. Handing it to me, he reached out and pulled me to my feet. Pain flooded down into my leg, but I clenched my lips together and propped most of my weight onto the makeshift staff, then took a few experimental steps. I could walk, just barely. I nodded grimly. Iolaus handed me my soaking wet cloak and I wrapped it tightly around me.

Then he helped Hercules to stand. The demi-God staggered and went very pale, but remained upright. 

Iolaus threw the blanket from my bedroll over his partner's shoulders, then tucked the rest of my gear back into the saddlebags and put them over his own shoulders. Fitting himself under one of Hercules' arms, he guided the demi-God forward, with me hobbling along by his side.

I heard him say encouragingly, "Hey, Herc, this is good. I get to carry you for a change."

Hercules didn't laugh, but he did smile faintly.

With the wind whipping around us and the rain settling into a steady downpour, we started back along the increasingly-muddy road I had traveled so hopefully just a short time ago. 

I never knew just how long a "short distance" could be, until I walked it that day, the cold rain drenching me, each step sending a fresh spike of agony up my leg, and two of the people I loved and respected most in this world shuffling along painfully beside me. The road soon turned into a muddy rivulet, and lightning flashed around the skies as if Zeus himself was on a rampage. With the hood of my cloak pulled far down over my eyes and the rain blowing and tumbling in the fitful gusts of wind, I could barely see where I was going. It was a wonder none of us stumbled and fell into the muck clinging to our feet.

I must have spaced out there for a while, as I don't have a very coherent memory of our trek in the rain. I wasn't able to do any truly profound thinking, but what thoughts I did have were a strange and unsettling mixture of incredulous joy that Iolaus was really alive and well, and a stomach-wrenching dread of having to face him once again, after everything that had happened since that first, and last, time we had met, way back before he had died. There were unresolved issues between us on several levels, issues I had never thought to have to face, at least not in this mortal lifetime.

At a certain point, I heard Iolaus' voice say, "Over there," then the going seemed to get rougher. An occasional tree branch brushed against me, and my feet encountered solid ground, even though it was inclined a bit uphill.

The next thing I knew, the rain had stopped hitting me. I collapsed gratefully onto a dry bit of ground. It was so dark that I could see nothing except shadows, but one of those shadows sat down heavily next to me.

I tried to get up, but a hand groped over in my direction, coming to rest on my shoulder. From close beside me, Iolaus' voice said, "Relax. We're in the cave." He slid his hand down my arm to find my own hand, then guided it over to rest on Hercules' chest. The demi-God must have been lying beside me, although I could still see nothing clearly. 

"You stay here with Herc," Iolaus instructed. "I'm going to check this place out, and hopefully find some debris I can use to start a fire."

"Oh. Good," was all I could think of to say, but I was exquisitely aware of that hand that had touched me and run down my arm. A sudden image flashed through my mind of how good it would feel to have him run his hand across my shoulder, down my body -- 

I dismissed the disturbing thought as ridiculous, forcing my attention back to the present reality of pervading cold and dampness Just to make matters worse, my leg, which had almost settled into a numb throbbing ache while I had been walking, now started to hurt again in earnest after I had been foolish enough to jostle it in my futile effort to get up.

From somewhere deeper into the cave, I heard Iolaus moving around, a few rustling noises, something that sounded like a rock bouncing off a number of hard surfaces, and then a distant splash. More soft footsteps and rustling went on, and then a small light flared and began to grow slowly in the surrounding darkness. I could make out Iolaus' dim silhouette nearby, carefully feeding the tentative flame with a few twigs. I looked around in the gloom, finding the ceiling of the cave to be not much more than a meter above my head, while the walls were pretty close on either side of us. About the only direction in which the small enclosure seemed to extend was back into the hillside.

"You couldn't have found us a bigger cave?" I said softly.

"Hey, you and I can almost stand upright, even if Herc can't," Iolaus pointed out, still encouraging his small flame to grow. "And he's not likely to be walking around for a while yet."

In the increasing light, I could see the demi-God sprawled out on the floor next to me. My hand still rested on his chest and I could feel his labored breathing, but he seemed to be either unconscious, or, hopefully, just asleep

"Will he be okay?" I asked Iolaus, trying to sound optimistic.

"I think so. Wait'll I get this fire going so I can see a little better and I'll check on him." He blew on the struggling flame, feeding it some dried lichen. "Whatever you do," he continued, gesturing behind his back with a quick jerk of his chin, "don't try to go any further into the cave than that grouping of rocks over there. It drops off into a chasm rather suddenly." He smiled. "Good place to take a piss, though, if you're careful."

I made a note of that, studying the rocks he had indicated. On first glance, that direction seemed inviting. The roof rose up slightly and the floor sloped downward, so it led one to imagine there might be a roomier cavern just a little ways ahead, where the darkness still hung like an impenetrable black veil.

While I held out my shaking hands to the welcome warmth of the fire, Iolaus worked at pulling off his boots, then took off his vest. Next, he leaned over and carefully removed Hercules' shirt, taking off the big man's boots also.

"What are you doing?" 

"Taking off some of these wet clothes. You'll never get warm if you keep them on, you know. We can lay them out to dry on the rocks over there."

"Uh –- okay." 

I had reasons for not particularly wanting to undress, but I knew he was right. At this point, I needed the warmth of the fire, not the heat-absorbing interference of wet fabric. I set aside my sodden wool cloak, then unlaced my tunic and pulled it over my head, untucking it from the brown silk sash around my waist. I might have to part with the tunic, but the sash was staying, along with the carved wooden circlet that took the place of a knot and held it in place.

As Iolaus wrung out and hung up our wet clothing, I began working on my low suede boots. I didn't want to remove the left one, and it wasn't only because I knew it would hurt to get it off, considering the arrow puncture not far above the top. Putting off the inevitable for as long as I could, I started on the other one first. 

"Oh, damn!" I muttered to myself. "Euphonius, you asshole!"

As he sat down beside me, Iolaus asked, "Why do you call yourself that?" 

From the look on his face, I thought I was going to get a lecture on self-esteem, so I hastened to explain the problem. "Because sometimes, I am an asshole. And this is one of those times. My boot knife is gone. I forgot to retrieve it after our fight with those bandits."

"Oh, I see." 

"Here, give me a hand with this other boot. I don't think I can manage it by myself."

He did, and the entire process only increased the pain in my leg. I hunched over the struggling fire, shivering.

The close proximity of Iolaus' half-naked body wasn't doing anything to help me convince myself that I couldn't possibly want him as much as my cock seemed to think it did.

After feeding a few more sticks into the flames, he moved over to check on Hercules' wound, adjusting the wet bandages so they were tighter.

As I watched him fussing over his partner, a nasty little voice in the back of my mind kept insisting, You don't really like seeing him with Hercules, do you? You'd far rather have that gorgeous little body all to yourself, wouldn't you?

I did my best to ignore the voice, even though I knew it spoke only the truth.

To cover up my treasonous thoughts, I forced myself into showing concern over the unconscious man. "You sure he'll be all right?"

"Yeah. Herc heals real fast. Half God, you know. I've seen him hurt a lot worse. Even pulled an arrow out of his side once, and he was good as new in a few days."

I was inclined to be a bit more doubtful about the injured man's prospects, but decided not to say anything.

By now, Iolaus had my saddlebags open on his lap and was once again digging through them. "Okay if I tear up another shirt?"

"Sure. Go ahead."

He pulled out the needle and thread I carried for emergency clothing repairs, then began untying the bandage on his arm. "I hope you know how to use this, since someone needs to stitch up my arm."

"I'm not exactly a seamstress," I said shakily, taking the needle and regarding the gaping edges of the gash that ran straight down his upper arm. "It would have been easier if I'd been able to do it sooner."

"I know." Iolaus handed me the pouch of the healing powder. "Here, use some of this while you're at it."

I sprinkled it on the open wound, then clenched my teeth and pushed the needle through the raw flesh. Despite my disclaimer, I'm pretty good with my hands, but it would have been nice to have had more light. I worked rapidly, not wanting this to last any longer than it had to.

"How do you know about these herbs?" I asked, hoping to distract him from the pain. 

"Spent some time in the East, long ago," he replied, picking up with his other hand the ceramic jar containing the –- what had he called it? Ju Muu Tsay? "Haven't seen this kind of thing since then, though. Where'd you get it?"

"From a herbalist I met in a tavern several weeks ago. Very nice young woman by the name of Katelin."

By now, I had almost finished my unwelcome task. As I tied off the last stitch, Iolaus opened the jar and scooped some of the paste onto his fingers, spreading it over the closed wound. When he reached back into the container to get more, he frowned in puzzlement, withdrawing a sticky lump. "What's this?"

I took the offending object from his hand. "Don't worry about it. It's mine." Rubbing the worst of the goop off on my cloak, I held up a large, exquisitely carved jet brooch, inlaid with diamonds of varying sizes and hues, which flashed brightly in the firelight. I shrugged. "Got to hide the really good stuff somewhere, don't I?"

As I wrapped the linen strips around his arm, Iolaus pointed out, "Not much of a hiding place. If the bandits had stolen your horse, they'd have gotten it anyway."

"I know, but this is too big and unwieldy to fit in my usual places." I tucked the brooch back into the paste, pushing it firmly to the bottom of the partially empty jar.

"Where's the rest of your stuff hidden?" Iolaus asked, an amused glint in his eyes.

"Trade secret," I replied with a smile.

 

Between the torrent still coming down outside, the damp cold, and our various injuries, we spent a wretched evening in the cave. I propped my leg up on a couple of flat rocks, hoping to ease the pain somewhat. I was terrified that the wound would turn bad, as I started alternating between chills and fever. When I could pull myself out of my own misery, I'd notice that Iolaus didn't seem to be doing much better. We both mostly just sat there listening to the pounding rain and feeling terrible. Hercules was still out cold. Maybe he was the lucky one.

There were things I wanted to say to Iolaus, but this just didn't seem to be the time. Or at least that's the excuse I made to myself. Some of those things might not be too pleasant, and we were already miserable enough as it was.

We tried making a bit of broth out of some dried meat I had, but the fire was so small that it didn't cook well, and we hadn't much more dry wood to use. Still, it was something to eat.

Later on, as the temperature fell even further, we huddled together under the damp blanket for warmth, my wool cloak the only thing between the ground and us. Iolaus insisted that I lie closest to the fire, then squeezed himself in between Hercules and me. That left the demi-God on the end, but I assumed he wasn't as sensitive to cold as we were, or Iolaus wouldn't have arranged things that way.

Or maybe he just didn't want me next to his partner, if he knew what had once gone on between us. Or did he know? I really wasn't sure.

As for the close proximity of Iolaus himself, I should have been hurting far too badly for it to have felt at all exciting to have him lying up against me, and yet some part of my mind insisted on throwing up memories from the time when he had been Dahok, and that lovely little body had been very often close against mine.

I shook my head, trying to dislodge the images. Come off it, Euphonius, I told myself sternly. This is crazy. You're not that horny. You can't be. Go to sleep.

But sleep was slow in coming, despite my exhaustion. And all night long, my dreams were haunted by images from the past; images that left my cock hard and aching when I awoke in the half-light of dawn.

The fire had burned out long ago, and even the embers had turned to ash. My leg didn't hurt all that much though, and I didn't notice the feverish alternation of hot and cold that had drained my energy the previous evening.

Glancing toward the entrance to our meagre shelter, I could see that the rain had stopped falling. I turned my head slowly. Iolaus was lying there on his side, his back to Hercules, who now faced away from us both. I studied him through bleary eyes. Like most of us, he looked younger asleep, his muscles relaxed and the lines smoothed from his face by the lack of expression. 

The blond stubble on his chin was thicker, and I could almost imagine what he'd look like with a real beard.

Absently, I rubbed my own chin. I guess we all needed a shave, by then. What I wouldn't give for a room at an inn, with a hot bath waiting for me. I closed my eyes, picturing that wished-for comfort. And a bed with a soft mattress –-

\-- and Iolaus lying beside me, in that very same bed. While I was at it, I added Hercules to the picture also.

I sighed, telling myself sternly, Stop it right now, you idiot. This is getting you nowhere that you want to go.

Dismissing the inn, the bed, and its fantasy occupants, I opened my eyes and looked once more at the little man beside me. Why did I find him so attractive, anyway? He really wasn't my type. I ran more to the tall, dark, and dangerous type. Oh really? Like maybe Ares, for instance? You've got to be kidding, Euphonius, old boy. 

Nope, I'm afraid not. Well, all right, yeah, the God of War had given me a rather hard time not too long ago. But that was still the kind of man I generally lusted after. Certainly not this little blond, barely as tall as I was, with the awful hair.

Between the dampness and the restless night's sleep, his extravagantly curly hair was even more disheveled than usual. I frowned slightly. Of all his features, it was only that messy hair that I truly disliked. I always had the urge to comb it out and brush it neatly into place. His counterpart from that other universe had actually had nicer hair, shorter and more wavy, instead of this mess of tangled curls. In fact, even as Dahok, he'd worn his hair in a far more flattering manner. 

My frown deepened at the thought of Dahok, and my eyes focused on the talisman around Iolaus' neck. Something about it had seemed different than I recalled. I had noticed that yesterday, but hadn't really had the time to think about it. Now, it lay flat on the cloak beneath us, and I could see it more clearly. What had changed?

I thought back to my first, and only, prior experience with this man. Hercules had gone to Mount Olympus to be a God, and Iolaus, heart-broken, went home to visit his mother in the town where I just happened to live also. Almost two years had passed since then, but I summoned up his image from where it lay enshrined in my memory, not quite buried under the newer memories of the former Jester and Dahok's evil creation.

Yes, there it was. The talisman had an almost serpent-like design, with a simple curve on the side to his left, and a more detailed and complex design on the right. Now, it was lopsided, with sharp edges where the far right part had been, as if it had been sheared off.

I barely had time to wonder how that had happened when an image flashed through my mind: a strange knife with a wavy blade flying through the air toward a beautiful dark woman. Then Iolaus, flinging himself in front of it, being thrown viciously backwards against a row of steps as the knife embedded itself in his chest, splitting his talisman into two unequal pieces.

I must have gasped or something, because Iolaus woke up. Seeing the horrified expression on my face, he pushed himself up on one elbow, alert and searching for danger. "What is it? What's wrong?" he asked me urgently.

"Uh - nothing, nothing," I hastened to reassure him. "Just thinking about what happened yesterday. You know, how we all could have died?"

He smiled and relaxed back down. "But we didn't."

I smiled back. "No, we didn't, did we?"

"How's your leg?"

"Not bad now, but I'm sure it will feel worse when I try to stand. How about you?"

He flexed his bandaged arm experimentally. "Not bad now," he replied, mimicking my tone of voice precisely, "but I'm sure it will feel worse when I try to swing my sword."

He laughed that infectious upscale giggle. My spirits lifted along with it.

Then he became suddenly serious, as he turned away from me and toward the big man lying behind him. "Guess I'd better take a look at Herc's wound."

"Good idea. You'll excuse me if I stay right here for a bit longer? This is the first time I've been warm and relatively comfortable for quite a while."

"Sure," came the distracted reply as he fussed over Hercules.

That's when it hit me exactly why I found the man so attractive. It really wasn't the nice body, or the blue eyes, or the pleasing features. In fact, it had nothing to do with any of those things. (Well, okay, maybe it had a little something to do with them. I'm only human, after all.) However, the main thing was the spirit that inhabited that compact body. It was his courage and energy, and sheer enthusiasm for life. It was the gentleness underneath the warrior's skills, the intelligence behind the carefree façade.

He was everything I wished I could be, but knew full well that I wasn't. In some ways, that was a rather depressing thought, but in other ways, it was encouraging. His very existence inspired me to try to be like him as much as I could.

 

Once Iolaus had satisfied himself that Hercules, if not much better, was at least no worse, he squirmed out from under our blankets, retrieved his boots and began pulling them on, no easy task considering that they were still rather damp.

"Going somewhere?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We've got to eat. Maybe I can catch some game, and scrounge up enough dry wood to cook it properly. If not, there should be at least some berries or roots or something."

I sat up also, resigned to the imminent necessity of facing the day.

Iolaus put a hand on my shoulder. "You stay here with Herc, okay? He may wake up. Besides, I don't think you could keep up with me too well hopping along on one leg."

He was entirely right. But as I watched him stride jauntily out into the morning sunlight, I decided it was about time I got up also.

Cautiously, I crawled over to the rocks, where our clothes had been spread to dry as best they might. It was a rather painful struggle to get my left boot on, but I managed. The rest was easy, after that. I smoothed down my tunic, running my fingers over the lumpy embroidered collar with quiet satisfaction. Then I retrieved the staff Iolaus had made for me and pulled myself upright. As I figured, my wounded leg began to ache as soon as I put any weight on it. Walking any distance was not an option, but my overfull bladder was clamoring uncomfortably for some relief.

Glancing past the knee-high jumble of rocks Iolaus had warned me about, I could see the chasm beyond them in the dim light. It took a bit of careful maneuvering, but I managed to find a place where I could stand not far from the edge and piss into the darkness down below. I couldn't see the bottom, and I didn't hear anything landing anywhere. When I had finished, I tossed a small rock into the yawning pit. I heard it bounce a few times. Eventually, there came a distant splash. Quite a ways down, for sure. Even more cautiously than I had approached, I backed away from my makeshift latrine.

Returning to our campsite, I hunkered down next to Hercules to wait for Iolaus' return. The demi-God seemed still to be asleep, but every now and then he stirred restlessly. His breathing was steady, but his forehead was still warm with fever when I touched it gently with my lips. All in all, he looked much better than I'd have expected, considering the severity of his wound.

 

Iolaus reappeared a short time later, a fat quail dangling from one hand and several large farkenberries cradled against his chest with his injured arm. 

"Catch," he said with a broad grin, dumping the quail on the ground and then tossing me a piece of the fruit. "I'll be back shortly with some brush for a fire."

I peeled the skin back and devoured the soft green pulp hungrily. True to his word, Iolaus soon returned with an armful of almost dry kindling. As he worked on getting a small cook fire going, I plucked the quail and spitted it on a stick, all the while stealing covert glances at my companion. A slight frown marred his features, and he was unusually quiet, as if something was bothering him.

After Iolaus had died and I'd been mixed up with both his Jester and Dahok counterparts, it had often been my habit, when asked how well I knew him, to respond with the somewhat flippant, "Too well, and not well enough."

Now, looking at the original man, unaccountably returned from death, it occurred to me that I had spoken more truly than I had known: I did indeed know him far too well in some ways, yet in others, I hardly knew him at all.

Judging by the sense of unease and discomfort in his entire posture and expression, I wondered if perhaps he might be thinking something along much the same lines about me just then. 

OK, I decided, nothing ever gets resolved by silence. Someone's got to start talking, and I just may have a bigger mouth than he does, judging by the large number of times I've put my foot into it.

"Iolaus?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?" 

He got that wary look people usually get when confronted with that particular request. "Yeah," he replied cautiously, turning the quail on its spit.

"How come you're alive? I mean, last I knew, you were dead, after that exorcism business and all." I figured that would be a fairly easy way for this discussion to start, for both of us.

This was apparently a much simpler question than he'd been expecting. As the quail continued to roast, he told me about how the Light had determined to wipe out humankind, then rescinded that decision after what he and Hercules had done.

Well, apparently the doomsayers who'd been claiming it was the end of the world had almost been right after all, I reflected as he told the tale. I was somewhat taken aback by the uncaring attitude toward humanity that had been shown by the Light. It seemed to me that this so-called Light could use a little enlightenment of its own. But then again, perhaps such a transcendent force isn't necessarily obligated to treat us as we might prefer it to, any more than the Olympian Gods did. 

Finished with his story, Iolaus took the cooked quail off the flames. "So I ended up banished from the Light, sent back to continue my life on the mortal plane." He grinned. "Some punishment, huh?"

He handed me a hot chunk of meat, dripping with juices. I juggled it from hand to hand, still considering the implications of his story. "What was it like in the Light?" I finally asked.

"I can't quite describe it. I was still myself, but –-" He shook his head. "In many ways, it was glorious. And yet, there were still things I couldn't agree with."

Yeah. Probably the same things I had been wondering about myself earlier on.

"Anything like the Elysian Fields are supposed to be?" I queried.

"No, not really." He took a bite out of his own chunk of quail. 

I nibbled on mine carefully. Quail aren't very big, and I wanted it to last as long as possible. "I find this rather confusing, about the Light and all. What happened to Tartarus, and Hades and Celesta?"

"I'm not really sure, but I have this feeling that the afterlife comes in many forms, for different people with different ideas in different parts of the world. There may even be new ideas in the future, and new varieties of the afterlife as a result." He frowned in frustration at the strangeness of the concept.

I thought about it for a minute, having never approached such a thing from that direction. 

"You mean, what you believe is what you get," I hazarded, "so be careful of the forms you create, because you just may have to spend eternity with them?"

He nodded, continuing to devour the roasted bird. "Yeah. That works."

"I read up on that stuff Zarathustra talked about," I went on. "You know, the Urge to Create and the Urge to Destroy, and how they're always there, opposing and balancing each other?" I shrugged, licking my fingers. "Made sense to me."

"Yeah," he agreed. "When I was in the East, they had another way of explaining it, but it wasn't all that different. There was the concept of yin and yang, the opposites which are forever intertwined."

We were getting off into philosophy, which was all very interesting but not one of the questions that was really bothering me. I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to know the answers, but I'm nothing if not terminally curious.

"When you were –- dead," I began, guiding the conversation in a potentially more dangerous direction, "did you know what was going on down here? I mean, they say the dead can hear it when a person thinks about them. Is that true?"

He smiled wanly. "Uh-huh. You and Herc were both thinking rather loudly about me on a number of occasions."

I digested that information in silence for a moment, then gave a nervous laugh. "There were times when I heard your voice talking to me, but I was never sure if that was for real, or if I was going crazy."

"You weren't crazy. It's difficult to actually get through to the living, but I managed it now and then."

I almost wished he hadn't said that, because then it meant he also knew about that night on the beach, not very long ago. Not to mention a whole lot of other things. I shifted my gaze to the flames before going on. "You –- know about me and Hercules?"

"Uh-huh."

"You're not mad?"

He studied the remaining slivers of meat on the bone in his hand. "How could I be mad? I was the one who told you to screw him, wasn't I?"

"Uh, yeah." But the tone of his voice carried a meaning that contradicted his casual words. "You told me. But somehow I don't think that's what you really wanted."

"It wasn't," he admitted. "I really wanted to be there to make love to him myself." 

"I'm sorry --"

"Nothing to be sorry about." He shrugged. "Neither Herc nor I are usually very jealous. We've each been known to bed others on occasion, usually women, but sometimes men."

"Aren't you afraid one of you will –-?"

"What?" he said, a gentle smile on his lips. "Fall in love with someone else? There's always a chance. But that chance exists whether or not you've sworn eternal fidelity. In the final analysis, Hercules and I will stay together because that's how we both want it to be, or not at all. Coerced love isn't worth having. Not to us, anyway."

Now might be a good time to change the subject a bit, I told myself.

"What about the other Iolaus?"

"What about him?" he replied cautiously.

It was almost ironic: in many ways, I knew that other Iolaus better than I knew this one. After all, I'd spent a lot more time in the company of the man who had once been the Sovereign's Jester than I'd spent with the man sitting across the fire from me now.

"Well, what did you think of that other version of yourself?"

His smile held more brightness this time. "Oh, I rather liked him. I hope he's happy."

"So do I.'

Something in my voice must have alerted him to what I was really thinking about, since he added, "I know about you and him too."

"I kind of figured that."

I sat staring morosely into the fire, not willing to meet his gaze. There was something else I wanted to ask him, but didn't dare. As it was, he answered me anyway.

"Euphonius, I also know what went on between you and Dahok. I couldn't do anything about it, but I saw what happened."

"Oh, Gods, that too?"

He nodded, but this time he was the one looking into the fire. "I had no choice but to know. Dahok made me watch everything he did with my body. I couldn't stop it. At first, I tried, but every time I did, he –- punished me. The harder I fought, the worse it got." The look on his face led me to believe that the punishment had been pretty awful. "Besides, it did no good. I couldn't stop him. After a while, I gave up trying, until the end, when Hercules got through to me during the exorcism."

When he finally looked up at me, I saw shadows in the bright blue eyes that had once held only openness and cheer.

Now I felt even worse. Did my very presence remind him of that awful experience? Would he see Dahok, every time he looked at my face? If so, how could he help hating me for that?

"I'm sorry," I began miserably. "I shouldn't have let him --"

He laughed bitterly. "You're sorry? How do you think I feel? It was my body, my own damn fault, for letting him trick me."

Well, maybe it wasn't me Iolaus hated, after all. It sounded as if he was doing a pretty good job on himself instead. And that very fact sent a hot flash of anger through my heart.

This isn't over between us, Dahok, I thought fiercely. Not just because he's back. For the shadows in those once-laughing eyes, and the damage you've done to that gentle soul, I'll hate you forever. I haven't forgotten my vow, nor will I.

But I had damage control to attempt just now, and rage wouldn't help.

"It wasn't your fault," I tried to object. "You didn't know --"

"I should have known!"

"No. It wasn't really you --"

"Oh, but on some level, it was me."

"Not on any level that counts. It doesn't matter. In the end, you were judged acceptable by the Light, weren't you?" 

"Yeah. But I can't seem to forget that I was tricked so easily. If I screwed up once, I could do it again. I'm just not sure of myself anymore."

His voice trailed off, as he turned his head away again, his shoulders drooping. 

"Iolaus," I asked gently, "have you ever heard the voice of the demon who stands behind you and ceaselessly whispers in your ear that you're nothing but a piece of shit?"

Almost imperceptibly, he nodded.

"And have you seen the nightmare shape of that same demon on the wall," I went on, "and felt the hideous fear that it is really only your own shadow?"

Again, he nodded.

"Well, to me, that's one of the many voices of Dahok. The Impulse to Destroy, the darkness in our souls that never truly dies, no matter how often we try to kill it. I'm not a hero, like you are, but I've heard that voice all my life, and I've learned to fight it. I've also learned that the battle's never over."

I paused for a moment, to see if he'd react. He didn't.

"I've also learned that that vicious little voice lies. For deception is the will and the way of Darkness."

He looked up tentatively, a faint smile haunting his lips. "Now, where have I heard that before?"

From Zarathustra, actually. But I didn't say that. Instead, I leaned forward and asked intently, "If you hadn't walked through the darkness, would you ever have reached the Light?"

His eyes brightened a little, but the shadow was still there as he replied, "I know. But it isn't just for myself that I feel bad. I did a lot of damage to other folks when I sold myself out to Dahok. You of all people should understand that."

Now I had to look away, as memories washed through my mind of the time when I'd been the shameless flunky of the creature Dahok had made of him. The times I'd ignored my own conscience in order to do what he told me. How much I'd enjoyed my position as one of his most trusted followers. And how much I'd enjoyed being allowed to share his bed. Oh yeah, I understood what he meant. But I also understood something more.

"Whatever I did was out of my own weakness, and it was my fault, not yours. Dahok only provided the opportunity; it was my choice to take him up on it. And my choice to oppose him, in the end." I met his eyes squarely once again. "It was a valuable learning experience, and I think I'm better for it."

He sighed, and tried to come up with a smile of acceptance, but the shadow still lurked behind his blue gaze. "I don't think it was a very valuable experience for Hercules," he said softly.

"What do you mean?"

"There's been a sort of uneasiness between us, since I've come back from the Light. I'm not sure what the problem is, but I can think of plenty of reasons why he might not love me anymore. I mean, after the way I betrayed everything we'd ever stood for by letting Dahok trick me." He shook his head hopelessly. "Gods, even before that, I died to save Nebula, after making love to her! That had to have hurt him a lot."

"I thought you said you guys weren't jealous about other lovers?"

He grimaced. "We're not, when it's just sex. Nebula and I –- well, it might have turned into more than that, and I think Herc knew it."

I mulled that over for a bit, then asked, "Have you talked to him about all this?"

"No. I haven't been able to. We've been real busy in the short time since I returned. I've tried to bring it up to him, but I'm afraid." Absently, his fingers drifted to the talisman at his chest. He rubbed the rough edge.

"Afraid of what?"

"Of what his reaction might be. Things have been awkward between us. Maybe he just doesn't care anymore."

As his head drooped in renewed despair, his fingers continued to play with the piece of shattered stone he wore.

It occurred to me that there was nothing I could do to fix the broken talisman, but I could perhaps try to fix something else that seemed to be broken. If I could find the right words.

I reached out to capture his restless fingers as I said softly, "Don't even think it." Taking a breath, I went on, "Iolaus, my dear friend, listen to me. Dahok speaks in the silences we build around our hearts, and in the silent walls we build between ourselves and others. Talk to Hercules about all this."

"I don't know if I can."

"You can. And you will, if you love him."

He nodded. The hand I held twisted around to grasp my fingers and he raised them to his lips and kissed them. "Thanks," he said softly.

I closed my eyes, wincing against the pain in my heart at the touch of those lips that could not be mine.

"Iolaus, I care more about you than I have any right to," I admitted. "Maybe more than I wish I did."

"I know. And you'll always be a special friend."

"But not the one you truly love. I know that. And I can deal with it."

Oh, can you now, Euphonius? Are you so sure?

Yes, I'm sure. Shut up!

 

It wasn't long after that when Iolaus took off to do some more hunting, since we were both still hungry. Or maybe he just wanted to be alone for a while, to think over the things we had discussed.

I tried to find a comfortable position and settled down as best I could to take a nap. 

I must have dropped off for a while, because I awoke with a start when I heard a voice behind me say uncertainly, "Iolaus?"

I turned. Hercules lay on his side, trying to push himself up into a sitting position as his eyes roamed over our small shelter.

I moved over closer to him. "Iolaus is fine. He's out hunting."

The demi-God nodded, still trying to rise. I offered him a hand. "Here. Let me help."

As soon as he was sitting cross-legged, he gave a huge sigh and shook his long hair back from his face.

"How you feeling?" I asked.

He thought about that for a moment. "Not bad." Flexing his shoulders and stretching his arms above his head, he twisted experimentally from side to side. "Not bad at all," he concluded with a smile. "We been here long?"

"Almost a day now. Between my injured leg and you being pretty well out of it, we couldn't leave, even when the rain finally stopped."

A shadow crossed his face. "Iolaus' arm?"

"Stitch up, bandaged, healing well," I affirmed succinctly. "Any other questions?"

"Not really." Then he changed his mind. "We got anything to eat? I'm starving!"

A good appetite is a good sign, or at least that's what my mother used to tell me. Iolaus must be right about the demi-God's ability to heal quickly. Either that or Katelin's herbs can work miracles. By rights, he should have been dead.

"Well, we made short work of the quail, but I've probably got a few strips of dried meat in my saddlebags. Let me take a look." Limping over to my small pile of belongings, I produced a bit of dried lamb, which was somewhat the worse for wear but perfectly edible, if you've got a strong jaw.

"Thanks," Herc said, gnawing on it as if he were indeed starving.

"No problem. With luck, Iolaus will be back soon with something a bit more tender."

The big man sighed again as he continued to chew, and a slight frown furrowed his forehead. "Uh –- Euphonius?"

Uh-oh!

"That's my name," I replied lightly.

"About that night on the beach?"

I just nodded and said encouragingly, "Uh-huh?"

"Does Iolaus, I mean --?"

"He knows about it. He knows about everything that went on while he was dead, not to mention while he was Dahok."

Hercules grimaced and made a noise that sounded rather as if he was choking on his mouthful of meat.

"Don't worry," I hastened to assure him. "He's not mad or anything."

"How do you know?"

"We spent a bit of time talking it over earlier today and comparing notes, okay? Trust me, it's not a problem." Then I really noticed the unhappy look on his face and added, "Or at least it isn't a problem if you don't turn it into one."

He shook his head. "I can imagine how he must feel about me. After all, I spent all that time with Morrigan. Then I wanted the other Iolaus so badly, even if I never did anything about it. Even you and I, that night on the beach --" He stopped, then tried again. "I mean, we --"

"Yeah, we screwed around under the stars that night. So what?" I shrugged, trying to make light of it. "Iolaus told me you two aren't exactly married. And besides, he was dead. You're not required to remain faithful all your life to a dead man, you know."

“Yeah. I guess." he agreed reluctantly.

"And he was dead those other times with Morrigan too, as far as you knew, wasn't he?"

The demi-God nodded, but still seemed far from convinced. "I feel so guilty. I must have hurt him so much by doing all that. And Morrigan and I, we were getting pretty serious, for a while there. It wasn't just playing around."

By the Gods! Hadn't I just heard this same conversation a short time ago, but in reverse?

The demi-God shook his head miserably. "He must hate me."

"He doesn't," I said firmly. "But you've got to talk it over with him, get it out in the open so you can settle this."

"I can't."

I rolled my eyes in exasperation, knowing he couldn't see me. Not again! I groaned to myself, then started in on another round of reassurance and comfort, this time aimed at the worried demi-God instead of his gorgeous sidekick.

In the end, I used the same line on him that I had used on Iolaus, about Dahok and the walls that silence builds. But even as Hercules' spirit lightened at my words, my heart grew dark. Why did I have to be the one to try to convince them to resolve their problems, while all I really wanted was for them to split up, so I'd have a chance at Iolaus?

Lose the conscience, Euphonius, old boy, and you could have a whole lot more fun, I told myself sadly as Iolaus came striding jauntily into the cave, carrying a couple of rabbits in his hand. 

His face blazed with sudden sunshine as he caught sight of Hercules sitting up. 

"Herc!" he exclaimed, dropping the rabbits. At first, I thought he was going to run over and throw himself at his partner, but he didn't. A wariness came into his eyes, overlying the joy that was there.

Leaning heavily on my staff, I pulled myself to my feet. "Now that you're back," I told our mighty hunter, "I'm going outside for a while. I need a little sunlight and fresh air."

Iolaus gave me a puzzled look. "But your leg --" he began.

I took a few steps. I couldn't walk very well, and putting much of my weight on my foot was out of the question. I winced. Oh yes, my injured leg still hurt a lot, but my wounded heart hurt a lot worse.

"I won't go far," I said with a forced smile. "Don't think I could if I wanted to, and besides, I'm looking forward to a chunk of those rabbits, once you've got them cooked."

"Oh. Yeah. Okay," was the distracted reply as I limped out of our little cave.

There. You've got your privacy. Now talk to each other, damn it!

The fresh air and sunshine did feel nice, after being cramped into the dank dimness of the cave for so long, but it did nothing to lighten the darkness inside my head. I sank down against a tree just a short way from the entrance and did my best to appreciate the warmth of the afternoon sun, determined to stay right there until I could smell roasting rabbit and had an excuse to go back inside. I might have dozed off for a little while, because the shadows had shifted a bit next time I looked around, and a faint aroma of roasting meat came to my nose. I also noticed that my bladder was once again full, so I dragged myself to my feet and started pissing against the tree, prior to heading back to the cave for some dinner.

"Well, well. Look who's here," came a harsh voice from behind me.

I barely had time to get my dripping dick back into my pants and grab my staff before a hand grabbed my shoulder and swung me around. 

Lycus and his bunch of outlaws formed a semi-circle, weapons drawn and smug grins on their faces. 

Oh, shit!!

"Hello, little merchant," the bandit leader greeted me. The dirty bandage around his head did nothing whatsoever to improve his appearance. 

"Uh -– hello," I replied, leaning ostentatiously on my staff to show it was a crutch, not a weapon. "It seems that we meet again, huh?"

"Yeah. And this time, you're not going to get off so easily." He pushed me around to face the cave. "All right, tell your friends to get their sorry asses out here."

"Friends?" I replied ingenuously. "What makes you think there's anyone else around?"

"Cut the shit, merchant," the one I'd dubbed Handsome cut in. "I spotted the little blond guy a few hours ago, out hunting. I followed him back here, then went to get the others."

Well, so much for lying. Guess I'd have to try something else. 

"Iolaus!" I shouted at the top of my voice. "Watch out! The bandits –!"

That was as far as I got before Lycus jabbed me in the gut with his fist and I collapsed, gasping. Before I had even gotten my breath back, I found myself hauled to my feet.

"You, in the cave!" Lycus announced loudly. "Come out, or your pal here dies real quick!"

I'd like to believe that I'd have told Herc and Iolaus not to do it, but I could barely breathe, much less say anything. It was all I could do to stand up, nearly doubled over and clutching my staff for support.

I could just make out movement in the shadows beneath the rocky overhang, then Iolaus stepped out into the light, with Hercules leaning on his shoulder. Iolaus didn't have his sword with him, and I couldn't help wondering about that.

They were immediately surrounded and herded back against the rock wall next to the cave entrance. At a gesture from Lycus, two of his men stationed themselves next to each of my friends, swords close against their necks. Herc and Iolaus didn't say a thing, just stood there looking sick, weak, and helpless.

The leader turned his attention back to me. "All right, merchant. I know you've got more valuables than we took from you last time. Give them to me, or your buddies are history." 

Drawing a deep and heartfelt sigh, I said only, "You win."

I removed my sash, pulling both ends free of the wooden circlet that normally held them fast. The circlet was carved in the semblance of a wreath of olive leaves, with several oversized leaves in a bunch on the part that was most visible. Carefully, I drew the tip of my finger across the inside surface of the leafy part, feeling for the barely visible slit in the smooth wood. When I found it, I caught the edge with my fingernail and slid open the lid of a small compartment. I dumped a pair of elaborate earrings into my palm and held them out to Lycus, who inspected them closely and smiled.

"Nice," he remarked. "Don't run across such good quality opals too often."

"Yeah," I agreed glumly. "The Romans say opals bring good fortune." I shrugged. "Guess they were wrong, in this case."

"Oh, they'll bring you good fortune, all right. You and your pals just might be fortunate enough to live through this little episode, if you've got more stuff like this to contribute. I'd call that pretty lucky, at this point."

Briefly, I debated telling him that was all I had, but decided against it. I doubted they'd believe that I had tried so hard to preserve my cache of truly valuable items at our first meeting, if all I had was a pair of earrings, however nice they might be.

Pulling the neck of my tunic around to where I could see the embroidered design that edged the collar, I found the bit of loose thread that seemed to have frayed off. A strong tug, and the end of the collar unraveled, allowing me to slip a pearl necklace from its hiding place inside.

Without a word, I placed it in Lycus' outstretched hand.

I didn't figure they were satisfied just yet, so I reached for my boot, in all innocence. Imagine my surprise when I felt myself grabbed roughly by several hands and pulled upright, to find Lycus' sword pointed at my chest.

"Uh –- is there a problem here?" I asked carefully.

"You keep a knife in your boot. I saw you skewer one of my men with it," the outlaw leader grated.

I gave a short laugh. "I'm afraid you overestimate my prowess as a fighter if you think I could take on all of you with nothing but a throwing knife. Besides, that wasn't my intention at all. I was merely attempting to get you more of my valuables."

"And why should I believe that?"

"First off, because I never got my knife back after our earlier disagreement, so how could I have it now?"

"Might have one in the other boot though," Eyepatch suggested sourly, rubbing the bandage around his thigh where I had nailed him in our earlier fight.

"Might, but don't. Check and see," I suggested. "And while you're at it, take off the left one, would you? That's what I was trying to do when I was so rudely interrupted. There's something inside it that I know you'll like." I raised my foot off the ground, lifting my eyebrows and staring down at it significantly. "Be careful, okay? This leg doesn't feel too good right now." 

Eyepatch took the hint, searching inside the top of my right boot first and not finding a weapon. Then he pulled off the other boot, not too roughly, turning it over and shaking it, as if he expected something to fall out. When nothing happened, he scowled at me, then stuck a hand into the boot, only to withdraw it empty.

The sword point pressed even harder against my chest, as Lycus demanded, "Thought you said there was something in there. You think we're stupid or something?"

"No," I assured him, squelching the smartass rejoinder I was sorely tempted to make. "Give it to me and I'll show you."

I was abruptly set free, with the boot shoved into my hands. Carefully, I reached inside, forcing my fingers all the way to the end and pulling down the flap of leather that formed a false toe, then pressing it down so it laid on the sole instead. Withdrawing my hand, I shook a large ruby into my palm and held it up for inspection.

Lycus grabbed the ruby, then took my boot, sticking his own hand inside. "Clever," he replied with a smile. "Check the other one also," he ordered his men.

"Oh come now. Do you really think I'd use the same place twice?" I objected mildly, but put up no show of resistance when they pushed me down and removed my remaining boot, then searched it thoroughly, with no success.

I sat there, glad to have the weight off my injured leg, and gave an innocent shrug of the shoulders.

"What else have you got?" Lycus demanded.

"Nothing. You've cleaned me out." Once again, I had no trouble sounding miserable when I told him that. "You can let us go now."

The raucous laughter that greeted my statement wasn't entirely a surprise, but I had hoped perhaps I'd be proven wrong.

"You really think we're gonna just let you and your friends walk away, after the big guy over there roughed us up with his bare hands and Blondie killed one of my men?" He moved closer, glowering down at me. "Besides, I don't like you much either, you tricky little smartass. I think we'll enjoy sending all of you to meet Hades. Let's see how well your tricks work on him, shall we?"

"But you promised --" I began, pushing myself up onto my knees.

"All I can recall promising is that you'd die if your friends didn't give themselves up. Never said anything about not killing you all anyway." He grinned nastily as he kicked my left leg with the toe of his boot. I screamed and wrapped myself around the pain. "And never said anything about making it nice and easy either," he added.

"Boss, how about we have a little fun with him first?" Handsome suggested. "I'd be glad to take the first crack at him. Or maybe the pretty little blond guy who killed Alexis."

The chorus of lascivious agreement from the rest of the outlaws was enough to snap my mind back into action, despite the agony in my leg. The situation was clearly hopeless now, so I did the only thing I could think of to try to get out of this mess.

"No, please!" I begged desperately. "I lied! I've still got one more piece of jewelry. I don't care what you do to the others, but if you'll spare my life, I'll get it for you."

As Lycus hesitated, I kept my eyes averted and away from Hercules and Iolaus, not wanting to see the look of hurt and betrayal I was sure would be on their faces.

The bandit leader took the bait, but was clearly skeptical. "Why should I let you live?" he demanded. "If I take you apart piece by piece, I'll find anything else you've got anyway."

"Uh-uh," I replied, shaking my head. "Trust me, you won't find it that way."

"I don't believe you."

I shrugged. "Okay. But are you really willing to toss away your chance to have something that will make all this other stuff look like small change?"

It didn't take him long to decide he wasn't that much of a gambler.

"All right. You come up with something that good, and you're free."

Now it was my turn to play hard to get. "Why should I believe you?"

"I swear, by --" he frowned, evidently thinking hard about how he could impress me with his sincerity. "By Hermes, the God of Thieves." Smiling in satisfaction, he declared, "You don't think I'd go back on that, do you?"

Actually, I had little hope that he'd honor any oath, whether he made it to Hermes, Eros, or Zeus himself, but I gave him a look that said he'd convinced me against my better judgement and nodded. "Hand me my saddlebags," I requested, motioning towards the pile of gear with my chin. At the same time, I glanced sideways at Iolaus, trying to catch his attention. He looked every bit as disgusted with me as I had feared, his lips drawn into a thin line and his forehead furrowed in a frown. Slowly, as if accidentally, I lowered one eyelid in a wink, hoping to alert him to the fact that this situation wasn't entirely what he thought it to be. 

Did I see a slight lessening of the tension around his mouth and a sudden gleam in his eyes, or was that just wishful thinking?

I took the saddlebags and went down on one knee, setting them on the ground so I was facing Herc and Iolaus, but most of the others had to shift around with their backs to my friends if they wanted to see what I was doing.

I rummaged through the loose clothing and assorted items, then triumphantly withdrew the jar of healing paste, pulled out the brooch, wiped it clean on the edge of my tunic, then stood up, holding it out to my fascinated audience. 

Turning it this way and that to catch the light, I pointed out all the wonders of this lovely piece of jewelry: the fine quality and varying hues of the inset diamonds, the detailed carving, and whatever else I could think of to keep everyone's attention firmly on me. Meanwhile, I shot a glance at Iolaus. He seemed alert and ready, so I had hopes that he had caught on to what I was doing. In fact, he seemed just a bit too ready. In order to keep him from acting too soon, I caught his eye and shook my head slightly from side to side, while everyone else was focused on the jewelry in my hands.

Finally, I gave the brooch to Lycus. Before he could react, I said tentatively, "There's more." Squatting down and once again rummaging through the leather bags, I gestured with my other hand that they should all come closer. Obligingly and unsuspectingly, they did, a few even squatting down to get a better view, while Lycus leaned over in front of me.

Meanwhile, I had gotten a firm hold on my little bottle of concentrated lavender oil and had worked the top off with a finger while covering the opening with my thumb, still keeping it hidden from sight. I wasn't at all sure the oil would have the desired effect, but Katelin had warned me about using it full strength. Besides, what more did I have to lose?

All eyes were focused expectantly on the saddlebags. Even the men guarding Herc and Iolaus were looking my way, instead of at their prisoners. I gave the guards a quick smile, which was really meant to tip off my friends.

Drawing the small vial slowly and dramatically from the pouch, I dashed the stinging oil first into Lycus' eyes, then into the faces of anyone else nearby. At the same time, I screeched like an enraged harpy, lurched to my feet, and rammed my head into the nearest stomach I could reach.

Hercules and Iolaus took full advantage of the distraction I had created. By the time I looked in their direction, they had overcome the guards and were wading into the midst of the rest of the ruffians, most of whom had turned away from me at the commotion. Iolaus now had his sword, so he must have left it nearby, just inside the cave entrance. I had barely a moment to admire how smoothly the two heroes fought together, even injured as they were, each relying instinctively on the other and coordinating their moves to the best possible effect, before I realized that I could be in danger and began scuttling backwards.

Lycus scrubbed at his burning eyes, swearing fiercely. He managed to blink them open just as I was trying to reach the doubtful shelter of our little cave. Raising his sword, he stumbled towards me, uttering some vile imprecations.

I deemed it prudent to retreat more rapidly into the darkness beneath the rocky overhang, hoping my two warrior friends would get around to dealing with the outlaw leader before he could catch me. 

My hopes were quickly dashed as Lycus followed me into the cave, cursing even more viciously as his head struck the low ceiling. He crouched, still trying to clear his eyes. 

"I've got you now, merchant. You're cornered like the little rat that you are," he said.

Cornered I might be, but he had to be just about blind, what with the oil and then going from bright daylight into the dim cave. I scuttled backwards on hands and knees, keeping low and reaching behind me to feel for the tumbled pile of rocks that I knew was there. When my hand encountered rough stone, I pulled myself up as straight as I could using my staff and deliberately scuffed my foot on the floor.

Lycus turned towards the noise, declaring triumphantly, "Gotcha now!"

"No way, asshole!" I retorted rudely, making even more noise as I appeared to scramble away.

Furious, Lycus charged across the remaining distance between us. I dropped flat to the floor just before he would have bowled into me, using my staff to catch his legs and trip him forward and over my body. His momentum carried him over the rocks and beyond. The next thing I heard was a long scream of terror, ending in a dull thud and then a splash. After that, there was only silence in the cave, except for the sounds of the battle still raging outside.

As soon as my heart stopped pounding and I could breathe again, I crawled over to the entrance and peeked out. Things were about over by then, with several of the bandits lying unconscious, while the rest had clearly surrendered.

Herc leaned against a tree, pale and breathing hard. Iolaus still held his sword pointed in the direction of his prisoners, but blood had soaked the bandage on his arm and was liberally dripping from his elbow. He had to have torn out the stitches, I realized ruefully.

Then he caught sight of me. "Euphonius," he said with a calm he could hardly have felt, "get over here and tie these men up." 

Before they realize just how close I am to collapsing and attack me! I automatically finished the rest of his request to myself as I hurried to comply with it. Despite the fierce determination on his face, I knew he had to be in bad shape.

Fortunately, the danger of the situation kept my mind off my throbbing leg for a while longer. I managed to secure our prisoners reasonably well before the world began turning black and I had to lie down. By then, Iolaus had gotten Hercules into a sitting position, and had bound more cloth around his own injured arm, stopping the bleeding. 

"Now what?" I asked faintly as the blackness started to clear away from my vision.

Iolaus looked around, thought for a moment, then said grimly, "Now we find where these bastards have left their horses and we head for town with our prisoners."

"Sounds like a plan," I agreed. "Just let me catch my breath, and I'll be right with you."

"I can handle it." He stood up, still a bit white around the lips. "Herc, you still with us?"

The demi-God opened his eyes. "Yeah. Don't worry about me. You find the horses while I check on our prisoners and tie up the unconscious ones."

"You sure?"

Hercules rose to his feet, shaking the hair out of his face. "Yeah. No problem."

"I'll get the rest of our stuff together," I volunteered, by now somewhat recovered.

Iolaus nodded and started off into the woods, as Hercules headed for the bandits lying scattered around the clearing.

I pulled myself up with my staff and limped around, searching the trampled grass and brush of the erstwhile battlefield for any signs of my stolen jewelry. The necklace and even the earrings were relatively easy to find, but the ruby was a bit more difficult. Finally, Hercules came over to me and held out his hand, the red jewel in the center of his big palm. "This what you're looking for?"

"Yeah," I admitted, somewhat shamefaced. "Thanks. You – uh – haven't found the diamond brooch, have you?"

He shook his head. "Last I saw, Lycus was holding it."

I winced. That was the last I'd seen of it too, but I had been hoping I'd been wrong. I limped painfully towards the cave, planning to get the rest of our few belongings together.

As I stuffed everything into my saddlebags, I glanced deeper into the darkness, at the abyss where Lycus had fallen. I figured I knew pretty well where my brooch had gone. The irony was that I had even sent it there myself.

I gave a sigh. Oh well, guess you can't win 'em all, can you? At least we were all alive and reasonably well. 

 

Much later, long after that day had become that evening, the three of us sat in the common room of the little inn where I had originally expected to spend the previous night. The bandits had been turned over to the local magistrate, we'd all been to see the village healer and had been freshly cleaned up, patched up, and bandaged, and we were now hungrily attacking a succulent lamb stew and downing our first tankards of ale.

Thanks to the excellent care I'd received, my leg hurt a lot less, and I was able to walk short distances without leaning on the staff. However, standing for any length of time made it ache abominably and it was very tender to the touch. Even sitting down, I propped it up as high as I could whenever possible. Just now I was sitting sideways on the bench, in order to keep my foot up off the floor.

Hercules and Iolaus were across the table from me, and I could tell from the way they were talking and joking around together that they had pretty well resolved the issues that had hung between them. It was also very clear from the way they were looking at each other that they'd be getting a room for the night pretty damn soon also.

Although I was trying to put on a good show of cheer and conviviality, I was less than happy inside. Wasn't I the one who had encouraged them to talk, to work things out? So why did I now have to fight back tears, seeing that my advice had been so successful?

And why did my heart, not to mention the rest of my uncooperative body, burn with jealousy and desire at the mere thought of them making love to each other? Who was I, after all, to even dare to want someone like Iolaus? And it was Iolaus I chiefly wanted, despite Hercules' all too obvious good looks. But they were warriors and heroes. I was nothing but a wimp.

And yet, I wanted him so much I could taste it, so much that I dared not even stand up to make a graceful exit because they'd see the evidence of my desire all too clearly.

Get a grip, Euphonius, I chided myself. You have no right: not to the body, that you knew so well when it belonged to Dahok; not to the heart, that has always belonged to Hercules. You have no claim on him, and you know it. So smile and swallow the tears, and be only what you can be to him: a good friend.

That's when I noticed the object of my affection and desire glance sharply at me. Then he leaned close to Hercules and whispered in his ear. They held a brief discussion, none of which I could hear over the general hubbub of the tavern. Nevertheless, I was pretty sure they were planning to retire for the night, so I plastered a carefree and falsely drunken smile across my face as Hercules nodded and Iolaus turned to me.

"You slept with us last night, Euphonius," he said with a mischievous grin. "Wanna do it again?"

I had to catch my mouth before it fell open. Then I reminded myself that it was probably just an invitation to sleep and nothing more, since we were all still recovering from our various wounds.

I managed to nod and say, "Sure. Love to."

"All right!" Iolaus rose. "I'll go arrange things with the innkeeper."

 

We must have ended up in the best room in the place, because it was certainly of a far better quality than I had expected, in such a small village. Perhaps the innkeeper was glad to have the famous Hercules as a customer. At any rate, our room was exceptionally clean, warm, and generously lit with a number of candles. 

It was also furnished with one nice, large, comfortable-looking bed. 

Still not sure exactly what the invitation to share their room included, I kept my eyes and thoughts as far from that bed as possible, even when my two friends pulled off their boots and reclined on top of it. Iolaus had apparently gotten an extra wineskin before coming to the room. He held it up to his partner, his eyes sparkling. Hercules opened his mouth. Laughing, Iolaus poured so much wine between the other man's lips that it ran down his broad chest. Then, of course, he had to take Herc's shirt off and lick up the spilled liquid.

That was too much for me. I strolled casually over to the window and made a show of looking out at the sky. The stars shone brightly, and a full moon floated overhead. I suppose it would have been a beautiful sight, if I hadn't been totally preoccupied with something else.

Euphonius, you asshole, I berated myself. Isn't this the very same situation you wished for last night, complete with bed, inn, and your wished-for partners? So what's the problem?

The problem is they're lovers, I answered miserably. And you're not part of that equation.

"Hey, Euphonius," Hercules voice said softly, breaking into the argument I was having with myself. "Aren't you going to drink some of this wine? If you don't, we'll have to finish it all ourselves, and Iolaus would get disgustingly drunk, if he isn't already."

"Me, drunk?" I heard Iolaus protest. "Never! No way! And certainly not in a disgusting manner."

"See?" Hercules continued. "He's already soused. Come on over here and help us out."

What could I do? I turned away from the safety of the window and perched on the edge of the bed next to Iolaus, taking the offered wineskin and downing as much of the sweet wine as I could manage in one long gulp.

No, I just couldn't do this. Much as I wanted to screw them both, I didn't want to come between them in any way. And I certainly didn't want either of them to wake up tomorrow morning and hate me for it, as could well happen, considering they were both less than sober right now.

I made to get up, but Iolaus grabbed my hand, keeping me there. I shook my head and tried to give him back the wineskin, but he wouldn't take it. As I gave in and took another swallow, the fingers holding onto my hand slid up my arm to my shoulder and he tried to pull me down to lie next to him.

"Uh –- guys –- are you sure?" I asked, as I resisted that not-so-subtle pressure.

"Yeah," Hercules replied, propping himself up on one elbow and looking me square in the eye. Suddenly he sounded perfectly serious and not very drunk at all. "It's okay. Really."

I shook my head, but my resolve was wavering badly. "Nah. This is between the two of you. I'm not --"

"Euphonius?" Iolaus interrupted me.

"What?"

"Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?"

"Well, yes, now that you mention it."

"Okay, then. Shut up."

He pulled my head down and kissed me soundly. I shut up.

As he continued kissing me, his fingers traced trails of fire over my skin, moving across my shoulder and along the nape of my neck. Then he wrapped his arm around my waist and turned over, pulling me down on top of him and then across his chest so that I ended up in the middle of the bed, between him and Hercules.

Unfortunately, even though he had done it slowly and carefully, my wounded leg still managed to land rather too hard on the mattress. The resulting stab of sudden pain made me break off our kiss in order to gasp. I was also fairly certain that my weight had come down on his right arm as I rolled over him, even though he didn't react quite as noticeably as I did. 

"I don't want to be a wimp," I said, "but are you sure that we're in good enough shape to be doing this sort of thing?"

"Thought I told you to shut up," Iolaus murmured, just before his lips claimed mine once again. As our tongues explored each other's wine-sweetened mouths, I felt Hercules snuggle up close behind me. 

"Don't worry," he whispered. "We're not exactly planning to swing from any chandeliers. It'll be okay."

I relaxed a little at his words, but even more at the touch of his hands rubbing the back of my neck and shoulders. My objections dissolved along with the tension in my muscles.

They were both expert at touching and caressing, but I discovered that Iolaus had a lighter, more teasing style. I joined in the action also, running one hand down his chest, underneath his vest. Pressed together front to front as we were, I could feel his cock twitch even through the warm leather of his codpiece. As my own fingers slid over his body, I took a poignant delight in his response to my touch. There was no hurry, no driving urgency, at least not just yet.

Oh Gods, how long had it been since I'd done anything like this? Simply touching someone can be glorious. I sometimes think we humans are meant to touch each other far more often than we do. We need that sort of contact, to keep us sane and happy. 

Iolaus finally broke off the kiss but no sooner had he done so than Hercules' lips replaced his. As I squirmed carefully around to face the other man, I felt those big hands reach under my tunic. Obligingly, I unfastened my sash and tossed it aside, allowing him easier access to my chest and stomach. 

The view of Herc's hair with the candlelight shining behind it was something I couldn't resist. I played with it tentatively and felt it slide through my fingers like strands of silk. Over and over our lips came together with a tenderness we hadn't shared that other time on the beach. 

Iolaus reached around from behind me and trailed his hand up my leg to touch my hard shaft through the thin cotton of my pants. Then Hercules  
pushed my tunic up almost to my shoulders and pulled me tightly against the front of his body. I could feel the rough fabric of the bandage around his chest and briefly worried that this might be hurting him, but considering that he didn't let go, I figured it didn't bother him too much.

The sensations of our warm, hot flesh rubbing together, combined with Iolaus' hand cupping my genitals were enough to make me want to finish this now. I lifted myself to that stroking hand only to have it suddenly disappear.

Before either Herc or I realized what he was doing, Iolaus had bounced off his side of the bed and was down by my feet. He took hold of one of my boots and started pulling it off. 

"I really hate shoes in bed," he said. "They ruin the mood." He waved negligently at us as he finished removing the offending piece of footwear. "Go back to what you were doing, guys."

I looked over to see the demi-God arch a stern eyebrow at his lover. "Watch out for his injured leg."

"Hercules, has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?" I asked archly, pulling his lips once more to mine and kissing him as Iolaus went on to the other boot. Gentle as he was trying to be, it still hurt. I must have winced, because Hercules drew back and chuckled gently. "Just poke his arm and then ask him if it hurts, Euphonius. That's what he does to me all the time."

"I do not!"

"Do too!" Hercules replied good-naturedly, retrieving the wineskin from the floor and taking another swig. With a somewhat shy grin, he proceeded to work his heavy woven trousers down over his hips and off his legs. At the same time, Iolaus removed his own vest and pants, with considerably less trouble than his partner was having.

I've died and gone to the Elysian Fields, I thought, seeing both of them finally stark naked.

"Your turn to strip," Iolaus said.

They might be gorgeous, but I knew full well that I was rather ordinary in comparison, not to mention about ten years older. Still, it would appear that I had no other choice, and I'm not in such bad shape for a man of my age. Sitting up, I pulled my tunic over my head, then started on my pants, with Iolaus helping me work the left leg carefully down over my bandaged calf.

Soon we were all tangled together on the bed once again, with me still in the middle. I had to admit it was much nicer without all that leather and cloth in the way.

In some inexplicable manner, the previously random groping and squirming soon began to focus on me. I wasn't complaining, especially when Hercules' hand started to get really serious with my cock. I felt the familiar tightening in my groin, but I didn't want it to be over so fast. I tried to pull back, to slow down, but Iolaus said softly, "Relax. Go with it." 

His breath tickled my ear, as his teeth nibbled on my earlobe. All right, if that's how he wanted it. I thrust enthusiastically into the hand now steadily milking my cock, as Iolaus' fingers played with my nipples and his voice whispered encouragingly in my ear. But despite the incredible pleasure of their combined ministrations, something stirred uncomfortably on the edges of my awareness. Something about that voice, and the words he was using.

I was teetering on the edge of orgasm, when he said softly, "Oh, yes. Come for me."

I froze. Those particular words sent a shiver of terror down my spine. For a split second, I wondered why. And then I knew.

Sometimes, when he had been Dahok, he'd said the very same thing to me, in just that same tone of voice, under very similar circumstances. My eyes flew open and I turned to look at him, afraid of what I'd see.

Alarmed blue eyes met mine. "What is it? What's wrong?" he asked urgently.

This wasn't the demon, I told myself, trying to banish the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. This was truly Iolaus, the Iolaus I knew and loved. Yes, and the same Iolaus who had also the knowledge of what had happened between me and the creature who had possessed him, and who therefore knew just how I responded to certain things.

"Dahok," I tried to explain. "He --"

Iolaus pressed his lips together, and the shadows gathered in his eyes as he realized what he'd done. "Oh, no! I'm sorry. I just automatically –- oh, shit!"

He tried to turn away, but I grabbed him. "No, it's all right. Just took me by surprise, that's all."

Hercules, meanwhile, had stopped what he had been doing and was just holding my aching cock in his hand.

Iolaus allowed me to turn his face to mine. "It's okay," I insisted. "I love to hear you talk like that. Your voice haunts my dreams and fantasies." I grinned and gave him a quick kiss. "Let's get back to what we were doing, shall we?"

With a nod, he relaxed beside me once again. But he had very little to say now. No matter. I was so close that it took very little more encouragement from anyone for me to fall over that delicious edge.

I had barely recovered my senses when something amusing occurred to me. I couldn't help it. I started to laugh. Okay, I have an inappropriate sense of humor sometimes. But after that little incident with Iolaus, I wanted to lighten things up a bit.

"What's so funny?" Hercules inquired, a quizzical look on his face.

"Well, before all this started, I was thinking how I didn't want to do anything to come between you two. And –- uh –- I just did." 

Iolaus giggled, but the demi-God still didn't get it. "You know, come?" I prompted, drawing one finger ostentatiously through the blob of gooey liquid on my stomach. "Between you?" 

"Oh." Comprehension dawned. "Oh, yeah."

Iolaus once again bounced abruptly off the bed, circled around to the other side, then lay down next to his partner, announcing merrily, "Okay, Herc, your turn to be in the middle."

With a lazy smile, the demi-God obligingly scooted over and spread himself on the bed between the two of us. Iolaus promptly plastered his entire body to his partner's left side and kissed him.

Now, I've had a bit of experience with orgies and multiple partners, but this was different. This time I cared deeply about both of these men, and I have to say I was somewhat nervous as a result. I let Iolaus take the lead, merely using my fingers to explore Hercules' chest, carefully skirting the bandage wrapped around his body.

Eventually, Iolaus broke off the kiss, groped for the almost empty wineskin and poured a small amount in Hercules' navel, lapping it out with his tongue. 

Noticing the direction in which Iolaus was inexorably travelling, I allowed my hands to follow him, teasingly tracing a path down the big man's side and hip then coming up inside his thigh. With some misgiving, I realized that Hercules' erect cock would never fit comfortably into my mouth, but perhaps Iolaus had had more experience with it. I watched as he licked its glistening length, then drew the already partially retracted foreskin carefully back and ran his tongue over the slit.

Hercules drew in a hissing breath and threw his head back against the pillow.

Since Iolaus seemed to have all the action on the bottom pretty well in hand, or perhaps mouth, I moved up to kiss and nibble on Herc's shoulders, neck, and face, running my fingers through his hair as I did so.

Soon enough, we had the big man twisting and squirming.

"Harder, Iolaus. Harder," he urged. Then his entire body arched to the orgasm as it raced through him. 

Even before he'd fully caught his breath, the big man abruptly pulled Iolaus into his arms. 

"I love you. I was lost without you," he said gently.

I could see the tension in Iolaus' face relax as he heard his partner's words. The shadows faded from his eyes for a brief moment as he whispered, "I love you too, Herc," then leaned down for a tender kiss.

I just lay there watching as the kiss went on to grow deeper and more passionate. They were beautiful together. My cock stirred to life once again, even as I also noticed the sharpened ache in my injured leg as a result of all the moving around I'd been doing. But the pain faded out of my mind as I became more caught up in watching my two friends kissing.

Then Hercules did much the same thing to Iolaus that Iolaus had done earlier to me, except that he didn't roll him over quite as far. Breaking off the kiss, he pulled Iolaus up and over so that the smaller man lay face up on top of his own body. With Iolaus in that position, the entire front of his body was accessible to the demi-God's hands. Hercules proceeded to stroke and caress his partner, returning repeatedly to his groin but never quite touching the hard shaft that jerked and twitched under those wonderful but frustrating ministrations.

Once, as Iolaus' hand strayed down to his crotch, Hercules pulled it firmly away and whispered, "No."

By now, I was yearning to touch that tempting cock myself, but I got the definite feeling that my assistance was not wanted. There was more than merely pleasure going on here. This was for real, and it was meant to be just between them. I could hardly get up and leave the room without breaking the mood, so I just kept still where I was and kept on watching them. I couldn't help reaching for my own erect cock though, stroking gently and slowly.

Then Hercules shifted around so that Iolaus was once again on the mattress, still lying on his back. The demi-God rolled over so that his upper body was partially covering the smaller man, while his left leg came down across Iolaus' thighs, pressing in between them until they spread apart. Meanwhile, he kissed Iolaus hard, while his free hand played with one nipple, squeezing and pulling. 

As Hercules moved against him slowly, Iolaus tried to rub his straining cock against Hercules' leg, but it didn't work. Frustrated, his hand moved once again to his groin.

The demi=God saw what he was doing. "Hands," he said gently.

"Aw please, Herc!" 

"Patience, buddy. Patience," the big man said with a low chuckle.

And he continued to thrust against his partner, keeping him pinned down. The top of his thigh just touched the side of Iolaus' balls, putting pressure on them with each stroke but never once making contact with his shaft.

Iolaus squirmed desperately against the man who covered him. By now, I was thrusting into my own hand in time with his frantic strokes. Hercules was clearly aroused himself, his own cock trapped tightly between their bodies and rubbing against Iolaus' hip.

Then Iolaus sucked in his breath with a shivery sigh, arched his body hard against his lover, and came with enough force to splatter his seed into the thick hair on the demi-God's chest. Hercules responded by hugging himself even tighter up against Iolaus as his own climax overtook him.

"Whew!" Iolaus exclaimed when they finally broke their embrace. "I never did it that way before. You didn't even touch me!"

Hercules smiled lazily in acknowledgement, his eyes devouring his lover's face as he relaxed back against the pillows.

Then they seemed to remember my presence. They turned to me in unison, just as I was jerking myself off. I smiled somewhat shamefacedly, not entirely sure how they'd react.

A seriously wicked grin spread across Iolaus' face and he said softly, "Come for me."

I did.

"Oh, Gods!" I gasped unoriginally. Then, after a brief pause to catch my breath and grinning at Hercules, "Or half-Gods, as the case may be."

They laughed.

As the laughter died away, we all just lay there in silence for a moment. Once again, I wasn't sure what I should do next. I shifted slightly, trying to get my leg, which once more insisted on reminding me of its displeasure, into a more comfortable position.

Hercules planted a gentle kiss on the top of Iolaus' head, and Iolaus snuggled closer up against him. I could see that the big man's eyes were already drifting closed. Sleepytime, I concluded, and was about to turn over and curl up by myself when Hercules glanced at me and then gestured with his free hand for me to come closer.

More than happy to oblige, I fitted myself against Iolaus' back and settled down to sleep with my arm around his waist.

As Morpheus drew his heavy curtain over us all, I was well content. I could have died then and there, and I'd have been satisfied with my life. 

 

For the second time in as many days, I awoke with Iolaus lying beside me, facing me, and Hercules behind him, facing away from us both. I grinned to myself at the position. Not only did they fight back to back, but they also slept that way. 

As I lay there waiting for the dawn, I reflected ruefully that my business trip certainly hadn't gone exactly as planned, and I was poorer by the amount the bandits had stolen from me. Then I glanced over at Hercules and Iolaus, and knew that I had ended up richer in other and far more important ways. 

I closed my eyes again, determined to make the moment last just as long as I could. I knew full well that when the sun came up, the two of them would be going on their way once more, and I wouldn't be a part of that, despite last night's fun and games.

I had barely begun to indulge my incipient self-pity when Iolaus shifted position next to me. I almost thought he'd wakened up, but then he sighed softly and settled down again, one arm draped across my chest.

It felt really, really good to have him snuggled up beside me. I couldn't help but think how nice it would be to have him always there. Still half asleep, I started spinning a wistful fantasy of him leaving Hercules and travelling around with me. I guess I must have dozed off then, as my daydream began to take on a life of its own.

I saw myself walking down the road toward my home, chatting happily with Iolaus, who was by my side. Even as I smiled and talked, I was wondering, now that I've got him, what will I do with him? Keep him in my house, with my housekeeper and her daughter, while I travel around earning dinars? 

Absurd image here of Iolaus in an apron, his face smeared with flour as he helped Ysabel bake bread.

Nope, that wouldn't work. Perhaps the former Jester would have enjoyed that sort of life, but this Iolaus certainly wouldn't.

Well then, have him tag along on my business trips, helping me buy and sell jewelry?

Another picture of Iolaus, this time wearing a fancy tunic and holding up a dangly red carnelian earring to a giggling courtesan, who had eyes only for the yummy little man, rather than the bit of finery he was trying to sell. 

"Here you are, my dear," he said. "This one is absolutely you. It goes so well with your coloring, and picks up the red highlights in your hair."

No, that was so dreadful as to be almost funny.

Meanwhile, what was happening to Hercules, since Iolaus had dropped him in order to be with me?

I saw the demi-God wandering around aimlessly by himself, alone and dispirited. This was even more devastating than when Iolaus was dead, because now his beloved was alive, but didn't want him. Oh yes, Hercules still tried to be a hero, but his heart wasn't in it. Over the years, he grew sad and hopeless, and then bitter. Then one day, fighting something –- monsters, bandits, Gods –- it didn't matter what –- he got careless and died from a sneak attack, because he forgot there was no one there guarding his back.

Iolaus, hearing about Hercules' death, went into a fit of guilt and depression and hanged himself from the ceiling of my home with a heavy gold chain.

I woke up with a start, the innocent dream having turned itself into a nightmare. With a sigh of relief, I saw Iolaus curled up next to me, still slumbering peacefully. Hercules lay on his side behind him, one muscular arm resting over the smaller man's waist.

I smiled. Yeah, they'd be leaving me soon enough and that hurt. But that was how it should be, after all. They were warriors and heroes, and they belonged together. 

As the light of a new day crept slowly through the window, my smile grew wider and the pain in my heart dissolved. Iolaus was alive again, and he was still my friend. More than my friend, actually, considering last night. In the final analysis though, I knew he belonged to Hercules. 

But still, he was alive. 

And somehow just that simple little fact was enough to make me feel more truly alive also.


	9. REMEMBERED A HERO

REMEMBERED A HERO

"You fought hard for your country, and you fought brave. You will always be remembered a hero."  
Hercules, in "War Wounds"

 

It all started when my housekeeper's young daughter came running into my room in tears, sobbing loudly.

"Dari, what is it? What's wrong?" I asked, wondering what could possibly have brought her to such a state. At all of thirteen years old, Dari was no crybaby. In fact, she was usually quite stoic and reserved, for a girl.

She threw herself into my arms, weeping against my shirt. "Oh, Uncle Euphonius! It's Xena and Gabrielle! They're dead!"

"Dead? How do you know? The last I heard, they were fine, and Xena had a baby."

"I was on my way home from school when I stopped to listen to a travelling bard. It must be true. He got the story from Joxer."

Half from curiosity, and half in an attempt to distract the child from her crying, I asked what had happened. Between sobs, she told me about how Xena and Gabrielle had been pursued by the remaining Gods. (Zeus and Hera had supposedly disappeared somehow, if you can believe that. I don't.) Finally, the two women had been driven over a cliff in a wagon, along with the baby girl. Gabrielle died in the fall, the infant when the wagon burned, and Xena, seeing what had happened, took poison and died in Ares' arms, despite the War God's efforts to stop her.

Assuming the tale to be true, Xena's death was a great loss to the world. She had always been a hero, fighting against injustice and cruelty, and inspiring hope in the common folk wherever she went. Pretty much like Hercules, in fact. But still, Dari's hysterics were a bit much, considering that Xena was a complete stranger.

"Why are you so upset, honey?" I soothed. "It's awful that such good people died, but you don't even know them."

Dari took a long and shaky breath, clearly trying to get her tears under control. "Xena's my hero. I want to be a warrior and fight monsters and bad guys, just like she did."

I'll be the first one to admit that I hadn't paid too much attention to my housekeeper's little girl over the years that she'd been with me, so I didn't know the child on much more than a superficial level. Not surprising, since I don't spend a lot of my time at home, given my profession as a travelling jewelry merchant. Now, however, what Dari said was beginning to worry me. She was a nice enough little kid, and I always figured she'd turn into a nice enough young woman, and then, someday, a wife and mother. Becoming a warrior just wasn't in the picture.

"I've fought a few bad guys and monsters myself, dear," I told her. "Believe me, it isn't all it's cracked up to be. It's pretty scary, not to mention just plain old hard work."

She pulled herself out of my arms and glared at me stubbornly. "I don't care. That's what I want to do."

I couldn't see letting her carry on with this absurd notion any longer.

"And what does your mother think of all this?" I asked reasonably.

She shrugged, as if Ysabel's opinion mattered little to her. "Mommy wants me to grow up to be like her, and learn to do all the things she does."

"So don't you think you'd be much better off doing as she says?"

"But, Uncle Euphonius, I thought at least that you might understand."

"I'm sorry, but I don't. Being a warrior isn't for girls."

"Xena did it, and she's a girl."

She had me there. "Let's just say that Xena was a very special girl. Most girls don't grow up to be like her."

"I will."

"I doubt it. Someday you'll find a nice young man and --"

"— and clean his house, cook his meals, and have his children, the way Mommy does for you." She stopped for a moment, considering. "Well, not having children maybe, but all the rest of it. I don't want to do that. It's boring."

What could I say? It did sound awfully boring, the way she described it. Not exactly what I'd want for my own life, but then, I'm a man.

"Your mother doesn't seem to mind," I replied lamely.

"I'm not my mother and I'm not gonna do it!" she retorted, hands on hips.

I fell back on that tired old cliché, which also just happens to be true. "You'll feel different about it when you grow up."

"No, I won't," she informed me emphatically. "Oh, you just don't understand!"

With that, Dari burst into tears once again and ran out of the room, much to my relief. I figured if I gave her a few days, she'd get over this silly notion.

 

I thought I had handled everything just fine, and was congratulating myself on being so good with a child who, after all, wasn't even my own, when she came up to me later that day while I was gathering things together for my travelling pack, looked me square in the eye, and asked, "Uncle Euphonius, you're going off again soon, aren't you?"

I nodded, wondering why she cared. Holding up my sea-green cotton tunic, I tried to decide between that and a heavier dark blue one.

"Where are you going?"

Definitely the cotton. Summer was coming and the days would only be getting hotter. "I've got to pick up a shipment of rubies, for a very special piece of jewelry I'm having made."

"Is that for the necklace you promised Aphrodite, after she helped you make that big sale?"

"Yep." I picked up the blue tunic and went over to hang it back in the closet.

"Why do you have to go get them yourself?"

"I want to make sure they're exactly right," I explained from inside the closet. "Pink rubies are difficult to find, but Lucama claims to have just what I want. He's an old man, not at all willing to make the trip here to Lydicea, so I'm going to him. If I like what I see, I'll deliver the jewels to the artisan on my way back."

"Will you be going near Corinth?"

As I came back into the main part of my room, I was sure she was driving at something with this persistent line of questioning, but I didn't know what it was. "Yes. That's where the craftswoman lives who'll be making the necklace."

"Will you take me along with you? I need to go to Corinth."

Ah! Now we’re getting somewhere!

"Why?"

"I want to make a sacrifice in Ares' temple."

"A sacrifice? Whatever for?"

"Ares is the God of warriors."

Oh, shit, not that again!

"No, dear," I corrected sharply. "Ares is the God of War. It's not the same."

"What's the difference? In the stories the bards tell, most of the warriors serve Ares, therefore he must be the right God for me." She crossed her arms and stared at me sternly, certain of her logic.

"Warriors aren't necessarily the same as soldiers, Dari." I sat down on the bed, all thought of packing gone from my mind.

"They both know how to fight, and they both have lots of courage," she replied firmly. "That's what I want to be. And I need Ares to help me."

"Uh –- you don't want to have anything to do with Ares. Trust me. I met him once, and it wasn't a real good experience."

Her eyes went wide. "You did? Wow! What did he do?"

I'd gotten her attention now, but I didn't particularly want it. Or, at least, not over this. "I can't tell you all the details, but it was pretty nasty."

"Uncle Euphonius!" she exclaimed in annoyance. "You can tell me. I'm a big girl now, not a baby."

"Yes, I know. But still --" I sighed, knowing I'd have to explain something about what had happened. "Remember Iolaus, from the other world, not the one in this world?"

"The cute little guy who gave my mother that fire-starting thingie, and later became a merman?" I nodded. "Yeah, I remember. I liked him."

"Well, Ares kidnapped him and -– uh –- hurt him."

"Really? How do you know?"

"I was with Iolaus at the time, and just sort of got kidnapped with him by accident."

Dari looked at me skeptically, then made up her mind. "If Ares hurt Iolaus, he must have had a good reason. The Gods know what they're doing, right?"

Now how could I answer that one truthfully, without destroying her faith in the Gods? And if I did that, her mother would be pissed off for sure. A pissed off housekeeper I did not need.

"Well, mostly they do," I temporized.

She nodded as if that decided the argument. "Then I want to go to Ares' temple in Corinth and ask him to help me."

I decided to try a different tack, since this one wasn't working. "Why do you need help from the God of War to be a warrior?"

Looking exasperated, she replied shortly, "Because I can't do it by myself."

"Why not?"

"How am I going to learn the fighting skills I need around here, in this silly little village? There's no one to teach me."

"You go to school in the village, Dari. That's what you should be studying, not how to hurt and kill people."

"I want to learn both." She crossed her arms and glared at me, the very picture of stubborn determination. "If you won't help me, I'm gonna run away."

Oops, this could be serious! I didn't want to have to scour the countryside looking for a lost child, especially when I was about to take off on an important trip. Besides, maybe taking her along would be a good idea. She was certainly old enough to start learning about the jewelry business. Possibly travelling with me would get her interested in it. She seemed dead set against marriage, so it wouldn't hurt if she acquired some firsthand knowledge of the outside world, since she might one day have to make her own way in it.

"Tell you what: if your mother agrees, you can come along, all right?"

"Great! And we can stop at Ares' temple on the way back?"

"Well, we'll see about that when the time comes. But no more talk of running away. Deal?"

She nodded and stuck out her hand. "Deal," she agreed as we solemnly shook on it. 

 

By the following day, everything was almost ready for us to leave. A message had been sent off to Lucama, advising him that I would soon be on my way. The blacksmith was putting fresh shoes on my horse. I had the supplies all packed, and the dinars I'd be carrying to make the payment if the deal went through were all carefully hidden in various places.

I was taking a well-earned nap when Dari knocked on the door to my room and announced, "You have a visitor."

Still groggy and half-asleep, I ran my fingers through my hair to smooth it into place, brushed the wrinkles out of my clothing, and stumbled out to see who it was that had disturbed my rest. As you may well imagine, I wasn't in the best of moods. Not until I caught sight of the man standing at the door, anyway.

"Iolaus! What a pleasant surprise!" I exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

He gave me his usual blinding smile and shrugged. "Visiting my mother for a few days. Thought I'd look you up while I was here."

Erytheia lived in Lydicea, the village just over the hill from my estate. In fact, I had first met Iolaus when he had stopped by to see his mother, many years ago.

I glanced around outside the door, expecting to find Hercules somewhere nearby. "Where's the big guy?" I asked with a smile.

"Oh, Herc promised Iphicles that he'd help him with some important negotiations that are going on over a peace treaty or something. Totally boring, and they don't need me. It'll probably take a couple of weeks, so I said I'd go off on my own for a bit, then meet him back in Corinth later on."

His voice was sunny and cheerful, so I don't know exactly what made me think there was more to it than he had so casually explained.

"Well, let's go to the tavern and have a bite to eat, shall we? I'd offer you something here, but my housekeeper had to go off to help one of the neighbor women, and I have no idea when she'll be back." I shrugged apologetically. "Ysabel's kind of taken over as the town midwife lately, since the last one died."

"The tavern's fine. Let's go."

"Wait a minute. I need to put on some nicer clothes. I just woke up and --"

He took my arm and dragged me out the door. "Don't worry, you look fine. Or at least no worse than I usually do. Come on. It's been a long time since lunch and I'm starving."

 

Several helpings of a spicy lamb stew and a few drinks later, we sat talking over old times at my favorite corner table at the small inn. Try as he might to sound cheerful, Iolaus had something bothering him. Underneath the bright smile, sorrow seemed to be lurking.

Eventually, he brought it up. "You heard about Xena and Gabrielle, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Real shame. My housekeeper's little girl is quite upset about it."

"Why?"

I shrugged carelessly. "You know how kids are. Xena was one of her heroes."

He thought that over for a minute. "You ever meet Xena or Gabrielle?"

"No, I'm afraid not."

"I did, many times."

"I know. I've heard the bards' tales."

He pressed his lips together. "Don't believe everything you hear. Sometimes the stories are grossly exaggerated. And sometimes, they miss things altogether."

"Care to let me know what they've missed this time? Or maybe what they've exaggerated? I've heard tell that you and Xena had a bit of a problem once."

"Yeah. But I forgave her for all that. Or at least, I tried to. It wasn't easy, watching her with Hercules, after what she'd done to me. But she had changed, and we did our best to get past that." He paused for a moment, and a vague smile came to his face, as if he were thinking wistfully of the past. "Gabrielle, now. There was someone I think I almost could have loved, if she hadn't been with Xena, and I hadn't been with Herc." He smiled up at me, securely back in the present. "It would have fit so well. You know, the two sidekicks of the two famous heroes, and all that? But Gabrielle was a sweet young woman, when I first met her. Life with Xena matured her, and made her different." He shrugged, trying to pass it off lightly. "Well, times change, and people change. It probably wouldn't have worked out, even if we'd both been free and interested enough in each other to have tried."

"So what's the problem?"

"What problem?"

"The one that's had you so down in the mouth ever since you arrived."

"I'm not –- I mean --" He scrubbed his hand over his face, then looked up at me. "Yeah, okay, I guess I haven't been my usual self, have I?"

"Not even close," I said. "Whatever it is, you can tell me about it."

He smiled slightly. "The news of Xena's death really got to Herc, even though they'd only been good friends for a long time now. I tried to console him, but it seemed like every time he looked at me, he remembered what had happened between Xena and me all those years ago. He never said anything, but I could see it on his face. That's why I was almost glad when Iphicles asked that Herc come and help him. I figured he'd get over it faster with something new to occupy his mind for a while."

"And maybe without you around to remind him of the past?"

"Yeah. That too."

"I see." I downed another draught of my ale, then went on heartily, "Well, Herc's loss is my gain. I'm sure glad to see you again. How long will you be staying?"

"Oh, just a couple of days. There are a few odd jobs my mother would like me to take care of. Pandion's a nice guy and a great poet, but he's not much of a handyman, I'm afraid. After that, I was going to go hunting for a bit and then sell the pelts. Herc may not worry about money too much, but I like for us to have a bit of cash when we're travelling." He nodded towards our savaged lamb stew and grinned. "Dinners are more reliable when you've got some dinars with you."

"I can well understand that." An idea struck me just then. "Maybe you'd like to come along with me on a business trip?" I suggested. "I've got to pick up some pink rubies, and would be very happy to have an escort on the way. I could pay you more than the worth of a few animal skins. Above and beyond your charming company --" I flashed him my best smile –- "I'd like to have you along for safety's sake. After that last little encounter I had with bandits, I'm being a bit more cautious than I used to be. If you and Hercules hadn't come along at just the right time, I'd've been dead."

"Yeah, I remember that." He changed the subject abruptly by asking, "So what are you going to do with pink rubies?" 

I got the feeling he was stalling for time, while he tried to make up his mind about my offer of employment, so I gave him the time he wanted. I told him about the rubies, and then had to recite the tale of my adventure with the other Iolaus and Nautica, and how they were happily living together in the ocean and already had a baby daughter.

"And that's how I came to owe a special gift to Aphrodite," I concluded. "Believe me, after the deal I struck with the ladies on Lesbos, I can well afford to have that necklace made up for her. The only problem has been finding enough pink rubies. I finally located a merchant who has what I need, but he lives in Gargatha --"

"Gargatha?" Iolaus interrupted me. "That seaport town a little ways beyond Epidaurus?"

"Yeah. You know the place?"

"Sure do. Got some old friends there, in fact."

"So come along with me, and you can visit them," I invited cheerfully.

"I don't know --" he replied, clearly hesitant to agree to what had seemed to me such an excellent offer on my part.

By now I thought I had figured out why. Things had gotten a little hot and heavy in the sex department, the last time I had been with him and Hercules. Maybe he was afraid I had designs on him, designs that he might not be particularly willing to draw. After all, inviting him to accompany me on a long trip, where we'd be alone together –-

Well, if that was the problem, I could fix it easily enough.

"Oh, did I forget to mention that my housekeeper's little girl will be going also? I'd really like to be sure she's safe."

Yeah, I was using Dari to try to convince him, but it was only the truth, after all. Iolaus and I wouldn't be alone together, since there would be a child with us. 

Whether or not I had guessed right, this consideration seemed to make a difference. Brightening up a bit, he asked, "How soon are you leaving?"

I revised my departure date quickly. "Three, four days from now. Will that give you enough time to finish what you need to do for your mother?"

"Yeah. Okay, count me in."

I raised my mug as if making a toast. He lifted his own, tapping mine and then drinking the rest of his ale. I did the same, and the sudden warmth in my heart wasn't only caused by the alcohol I had so quickly imbibed.

 

Four days hence, we were on the road. I had arranged for a horse for Iolaus also, so we were making good time. Dari rode behind me on my horse, her eyes wide with excitement as she started on her big adventure, but her mouth mostly closed by shyness in front of a strange man she barely knew, who nevertheless looked so much the same as the other Iolaus she had met and liked a couple of years ago. 

Dari's presence, combined with her unusual quiet, made the first day of travel somewhat strained and awkward, but she soon warmed up to Iolaus, who seemed to genuinely like children and did his best to draw her out, with a certain amount of success.

I found it a bit unsettling to watch the two of them together. It was clearly apparent to me that Dari was broadening her hero worship of Xena to include Iolaus also. This could be good or it could be bad.

 

By the second day, Dari had stopped doing such an excellent imitation of a clam. Now she was full of questions for her newfound friend. Wearying of her constant chatter, I let her ride behind Iolaus on his horse, instead of with me. At least that way one of us would get some peace.

When we made camp for the night, Iolaus went off to hunt game while I started the fire. Dari collected dry wood for me, then sat off by herself fiddling with something I couldn't quite see.

No sooner had Iolaus stepped out of the bushes carrying three fat rabbits than Dari leapt to her feet, holding a dagger in her upraised hand. With a playful grin on her face, she swung the knife at our returning hunter before I could stop her.

I don't believe he even recognized who it was, but simply reacted to something coming at him, dodging aside and grabbing Dari's arm. In fact, if he hadn't gotten a good look at her right then, he very likely would have gone on to break her arm. As it was, he merely took the dagger from her hand and released her.

"I was only kidding around," she said, staring up at the scowl on Iolaus' face.

"Shame on you, Dari. That's not how a true warrior acts," I chided her. 

Raising her head haughtily, she said to me, with a bit too much arrogance in her voice, "How would you know, Uncle Euphonius? You're not a warrior."

What could I say? It was true. I had fought no wars and won no victories –- or at least not the kind of victories she had in mind.

"Your uncle's right," Iolaus put in sternly, backing me up. "A real warrior doesn't launch a surprise attack unless she's prepared to follow through on it."

I gave Dari a "There! You see?" look as I asked her, "Where'd you get that dagger, young lady?"

"It's mine. Momma pays me to help her sometimes, especially when she has to go to a birthing." She looked at me warily, obviously afraid I was going to take it away from her. Clutching the knife tighter in her hand, she went on, "It took me a long time to get enough dinars, Uncle Euphonius. I worked hard for this."

My frown darkened. Iolaus laughed. "Hey, don't worry. There's nothing wrong with the kid carrying a dagger. Never know when it might come in handy, these days."

Even so, I debated confiscating the knife, then decided against it. Dari was a truthful child. If she said she had bought it honestly, then she had. It was not my right to take away something that belonged to her.

"Well, all right," I finally said resentfully. 

For his part, Iolaus asked the girl, "Know how to butcher a rabbit?" 

When she nodded, he pointed to the three rabbits he had killed and said, "Okay then, get busy. Let's see if you can handle that knife of yours."

Dari's smile lit up almost as brightly as Iolaus'. I don't think I've ever seen anyone skin and slice up rabbits with quite as much care and attention as she gave to the task that night, cheerfully demonstrating her skill with the sharp blade and beaming at any word of praise that came from her new hero's mouth.

When she was finished, she slid the dagger into a worn leather sheath and strapped it around her waist, glancing surreptitiously at me as she did so. I pretended not to notice.

 

Later on that evening, Iolaus and I sat around the fire together after Dari had reluctantly rolled up in her blanket and gone to sleep.

"Your niece is quite something," he remarked.

"She's not really my niece, you know. Just my housekeeper's daughter."

"Oh yeah. It's hard to remember that, when she keeps calling you uncle."

I shrugged. "She's done that for years. I never saw any reason to stop her."

"Oh no. No reason." He shook his head. "Feisty little kid, isn't she?"

"She's gotten it into her head that she wants to be a soldier. Xena's her hero." I glanced at him, and I suppose I looked as displeased as I felt. "If you haven't displaced Xena in her affections, that is."

"Nothing wrong with a kid having a hero," he replied with a disarming grin.

However, I was not ready to be disarmed just then. "Maybe not. But I don't want her growing up to be a warrior." 

"Why not? That's what I am," my companion pointed out. Whether or not he was insulted, I couldn't tell.

"No. You're a hero, and you travel around with Hercules."

"I don't see a whole lot of difference there, buddy," he replied.

"Well, I do." 

Wrapping my blanket around me, I lay down and closed my eyes, effectively ending the conversation.

 

It turned out not to be that easy to keep the conversation closed, however. Over the next few days, Dari took to spending all the time she possibly could with Iolaus, asking him about his adventures and hanging on his every word. Very quickly, it began to annoy me, but Iolaus didn't seem to mind. In fact, he appeared to be enjoying her admiration and attention.

Then it occurred to me that perhaps this was truly not hero-worship, but just a young girl's first crush on an attractive man. That notion made me a bit more satisfied, because it allowed me to dismiss the seriousness of this whole warrior business. However, it also filled me with a strange disquiet, and I couldn't quite put my finger on the reason. For me to be jealous of a child was patently ridiculous. If I wanted to be jealous, Hercules made a far better target.

The happy thought that Dari was really attracted to Iolaus and not to the idea of being a warrior didn't last very long. That very evening, we had barely dismounted when I caught the two of them apparently rough-housing together. My first impression was that Dari just enjoyed it because he was grabbing her and touching her, but then I saw them stop, and he began showing her how to do some of the moves. She listened with a sort of concentration I had rarely seen in a child, but her attention was clearly on the moves, rather than on the man.

"Dari!" I snapped. "Stop fooling around! There's a stream just through those trees over there. Go get washed. You're all dusty."

"But Uncle Euphonius, I'm busy now."

"Do as you're told, young lady."

With an exasperated glance in Iolaus' direction, she obeyed, heading for the trees as she stripped off her outer tunic.

Iolaus came over to me and started taking the saddles off our horses. "Something wrong?" he asked. "You're not usually so hard on the kid." 

Considering how I feel about Iolaus, I never thought that he could get me angry with him over anything. And yet, angry I was.

"You're encouraging her, damn it!" I replied. "You know I don't want her to be a warrior, but you're always egging her on."

"Since when?"

"Since you met her, for the Gods' sakes! Telling her all those stories of yours. Filling her head with ideas unsuitable for a little girl. Making her think she could do that kind of thing. And now even showing her how to do it."

"Hey, take it easy. Yeah, I've been talking about me and Herc, but have you heard all that I've been saying?"

"No," I was forced to admit. "She's always wanting to ride with you."

"Uh-huh. And you've been riding ahead or behind, so you didn't have to listen to all the chatter, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, for your information, I haven't just been telling her about the heroic and fun things. I've been giving her an accurate description of the downside of a warrior's life also: the danger, the fear, the pain, and the regret over some of the things you've done."

"Can't you just refuse to talk about all that? Try to discourage her completely?"

"Euphonius, my friend, you don't discourage something by refusing to discuss it. You know better than that," he replied gently.

"Yeah, I guess I do. I'm just so worried about her, and I don't know what to do."

"I've got an idea. How about if she meets some of my friends in Gargatha? Soldiers who fought in the Trojan War?"

"We won the Trojan War. Why let her meet the victors? I'd rather we show her some of the victims instead." I shook my head, having second thoughts. "But I guess that wouldn't work, would it? Troy is a long way away, and by now it's been rebuilt and everything. Oh well, so much for that idea."

"You're right about Troy, but you're wrong about Dari."

"Oh? In what way?"

"Showing her the killing and destruction probably wouldn't discourage her any more than my telling her about the disadvantages of a warrior's life. It would be far more effective to let her meet some of the victors instead."

"What good will that do?" I objected.

"Don't show her the losers. Show her the winners. Let her see what it is that she wants to be."

"Oh sure. So she can have even more heroes. I fail to see how that would help the situation."

Iolaus snorted and shook his head, as if he were amazed at my obtuseness. Then he asked, "You know anything much about where we're going?"

"Gargatha? What's that got to do with what we were talking about?"

"You don't know, then?"

"No, not really. Just that it's a small seaport town that's been growing quite rapidly in recent years. What else is there to know?"

"Ever hear of the infamous island prison that used to be not far from Corinth called Golgoth?"

"Yeah. So?"

"Well, Gargatha was deliberately given a similar name, so the events that took place at that prison wouldn't be forgotten."

"What events?"

Iolaus looked up to the sky and gave an exaggeratedly long-suffering glance before he replied. "Remember all the trouble King Iphicles had with some of the disgruntled veterans of the Trojan War, and how he finally decided to set aside land on his northern borders for them to make a new start?"

"Oh yeah, that nasty incident at the prison. But that was quite a few years ago."

"Uh-huh. Well, some of those vets didn't want to farm, but they did like the idea of a new life on the outskirts of civilization, so they set off for the southern peninsula instead, looking for a good spot to settle down near the sea. Just an out-of-the-way place where they could fish and maybe do a little trading along the coast, since some of them had had experience on ships during the war. Along that coast, there's always problems with pirates raiding the towns, but with this group of organized warriors there, Gargatha quickly gained a reputation as a good place to be left alone."

"You're telling me we're heading to a town full of belligerent ex-soldiers and marauding pirates?!" I exclaimed.

"Not exactly." He put a hand on my arm, trying to calm me down. "The pirates haven't been a problem for years. And once the vets got the town going, other people also decided to settle there, precisely because it was so safe."

"If I'd known all this, I'm not sure I'd have brought Dari along," I replied, uncomforted by his assurances.

"But this is an excellent chance for us to try to change her mind. Like I said, I know a lot of these ex-soldiers."

"Great! I should introduce her to exactly the folks that I don't want her to imitate. We've been over this already. I don't see the point."

Another long-suffering look from my companion. "This would show her what war does to people who seek it out, even when they win."

I was still thinking about that when he went on to ask the question I had managed to keep out of my mind until then. "Euphonius, are you really just upset over my encouraging Dari, or is there something else behind it?"

"Something else?" I asked, stalling for time to think. "What did you have in mind?"

"Oh, jealousy, for one thing."

"I am not jealous of a little girl," I replied stiffly.

He grinned and punched me lightly on the arm. "Yeah, you are. Come on, admit it. You'd rather that I be paying attention to you, not her."

"That's not true. I don't --"

"Sure you do," he interrupted.

And the worst part of it was that he was right. Yeah, there had been that night with him and Hercules, but that might have been just a fluke. I was scared to death that I'd never have him in my arms again.

"Okay, okay. I want you," I admitted. "I've wanted you from the moment I first saw you. So what? I know you're with Hercules. I know you don't love me, and never will. Again, so what? This is old news."

He stopped my impassioned outburst by putting his hand over mine. "I know. And I will be your friend, regardless of whatever else happens, or doesn't happen, between us." 

As always, he smiled and my heart melted. And my cock stiffened. The world turned into that timeless moment when you each stare into the others' eyes longingly, then lean forward for a passionate kiss –- 

Iolaus drew back, shaking his head. "No, not now. I just don't feel like it."

I wasn't willing to give up quite that easily. "What's wrong? Is it because of Hercules? You know I'll never try to take you away from him. Sure, I care a lot for you, but I'm not the happily-ever-after, forever-and-ever type. You should know that by now."

Despite my sincere protestations, he looked doubtful. "It isn't always easy to hold someone so loosely. I know. I've tried it at various times. If you really want something badly, you tend to hold onto it as tightly as you can."

"I'm not like that."

"You may think you're not, and you may say you're not, but when it comes right down to it --" He made a palms-up gesture, then fixed me with a somewhat sheepish smile. "Well, things aren't always the way we think they're going to be, that's all. I don't want to end up hurting you."

He was right, and I knew it. And yet I truly was willing to hold him just that loosely, as long as I knew I could hold him at all. I'd seen him and Hercules together, and I knew I couldn't break into that partnership. The Gods knew, I'd even helped get them back together not all that long ago, when guilt and misunderstanding had threatened to end their relationship. 

"If it came to a choice," I reassured him, "I'd rather have your friendship and respect than your gorgeous body." I said that last bit with a smile and a joking tone, so he wouldn't feel I was getting too heavy. "But I'd far rather have both, if possible. I can handle it. What you and Hercules have is special. I'd never want to come between you two, don't worry. You and I, we could never have that sort of relationship. I know that. Our lifestyles are too different. I'd never expect you to --"

He silenced me by holding up one hand. "It isn't just that. I just can't. Can you understand that?"

"Yeah," I admitted helplessly. Gesturing towards the river, I added, "Besides, Dari will be back any minute. This is bad timing right now anyway. But maybe some other time?"

"Maybe. I don't know." He sounded genuinely confused. "I don't want to promise --"

This time I was the one to stop him with a wave of the hand. "No promises. I'm not looking for promises. Only possibilities."

In silence, he nodded. And I had to be content with that.

 

Later that night, I tossed sleeplessly beneath my blanket. The ground seemed to get harder and more uncomfortable no matter which way I turned, so eventually I sat up and huddled a little closer to the glowing embers of our fire, moving as noiselessly as possible so as not to wake my companions. Iolaus lay facing away from me, distinguishable only by his light hair in the faint moonlight that filtered through the trees.

Did I love him? Yes. There was no question of that. Did I want him in my bed? Yes, just as often as he wished to be there. But did I want him as a permanent fixture in my life? No, not really. As I had tried to tell him, that isn't my style of love, and never has been. That's why I live essentially alone, and like it that way.

But that didn't prevent me from burning with desire every time I laid eyes on him. Nor did it stop the wistfully lusty thoughts that haunted me whenever he wasn't around. Nor, for that matter, did it stop the hard-on I had now, just from looking at him asleep over there.

But I'm not a young stud anymore, and these days my head is more likely to overrule my cock, rather than the other way around.

So why had he turned me down? He and Herc had never promised, nor practiced, exclusive monogamy. As I understood it, they were both free to have sex with others, male or female. Maybe he really just wasn't in the mood? Maybe our little disagreement about his friends in Gargatha had upset him? No, that would be just too trivial. He had to be worried that I'd become too possessive.

So how do you convince someone that you love him so much, you'll even let him go?

I curled up again and tried to fall asleep, mulling over that question in my mind.

 

The following day, I rode in front, but allowed my horse to slow down every so often in order to bring me closer to Dari and Iolaus, not trying to be too obvious, but wanting to know just exactly what he was telling her.

"I remember that other Iolaus," came her voice from behind me, "the one from the nasty universe. When I first met him, he wasn't much of a fighter, but he had courage. The bards say he became a hero, even before he became a merman, because Hercules helped him. If a little wimp like that can do it, I can too."

As far as I could tell, Iolaus didn't turn a hair at the reference to his alter ego as a little wimp. He just said, "You may think this is strange, but Aphrodite taught that other Iolaus more about fighting than Hercules did."

"Really?" When she answered him, she sounded very suspicious. "How do you know?"

"Herc told me."

"Aphrodite? That silly Goddess?"

Iolaus laughed. "You'd better not let her hear you call her silly, my young friend. She can be pretty serious, in her own inimitable way."

"I don't care. I don't like her."

"Why not?"

"Because my mother always wants me to go to her temple and make an offering. She thinks I need help from Aphrodite. You know, in the romance department?"

"Plenty of time for that when you grow up."

"Nah, not me. I'm not interested."

"You will be, one of these days. Trust me."

Satisfied that they were at least not talking about martial matters, I kicked my horse into a slightly faster walk as Dari staunchly defended her stand against love to an amused Iolaus.

 

That night, it was Dari who sought me out, while Iolaus was off hunting us dinner again. She came over to where I was working on the fire, looking strangely hesitant and nervous.

"Uncle Euphonius, can I ask you something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Were Xena and Gabrielle lovers?"

"I'm not really certain. Some bards say they were and some say they were just friends." I hit on an idea that would get me out of this possibly awkward situation. "Why don't you ask Iolaus? He knew them pretty well."

"I wasn't sure that was something I could ask him. I mean, I know about him and Xena and all." She looked up at me, meeting my eyes directly. "I also know about him and Hercules. And you."

"How --?"

"He told me. Oh, Uncle Euphonius, don't look so surprised. I've known about your preference for men for years. You know that. This isn't any different."

Gah! Now a child is more blasé about my sex life than I am!

"All right," I said slowly and calmly. Suddenly the little girl sitting next to me looked less like a child and more like a young woman. "If you want my opinion, and that's all it is, an opinion, then yes, Gabrielle and Xena were lovers."

She nodded in what appeared to be satisfaction, before saying very solemnly, "That's what I think also." Then her eyes turned tender and she touched my hand. "Thanks for being honest with me, Uncle Euphonius, and also for not treating me like a baby."

The fall of her light tunic in the firelight revealed the slight curves of a young girl's breasts. Funny how I had never noticed that before.

"You're certainly not a baby, my dear," I told her. "But you're not a grown woman yet either. Don't forget that."

"I won't," she promised. Then she kissed my cheek quickly and stood back, placing one hand on the hilt of the dagger at her waist. "But I'll get there soon, you know." With a short laugh, she ran off.

I shook my head, wondering what on earth had brought on that conversation. At any rate, it was an improvement over her usual subject. At least she was thinking of something else.

 

We arrived in Gargatha at mid-day. While I asked directions to Lucama's shop, Iolaus took the horses to the stables and went off to try to find his friends. Dari had wanted to go with him, but I made her stay with me instead, figuring she'd do better to learn a bit about buying merchandise than by hanging around Iolaus. She made a face, but obeyed without objection. Good. She was learning.

Besides, she had doubtless overheard me tell Iolaus to invite his buddies to a feast that night at the Victory, the best tavern in town, so she knew she'd get to meet them later.

 

I held the rubies up to the light and examined each one carefully. Two were fairly small, meant for earrings, while the other twelve were of a larger size, destined for Aphrodite's necklace. Although they all appeared to be of good quality, I shook my head and said to Lucama, "Well, I just don't know. They aren't quite the shade of pink that I had in mind." 

"Hey, what do you expect?" he objected, picking up one of the larger ones and waving it in my face. "Most rubies are deep red. I had to scour the earth for some that looked even a little bit pink. You should be glad I have any at all."

"All right, all right," I replied grudgingly. "How much do you want for these inferior gems?"

"Inferior?! You dare insult my merchandise?" He held the ruby up to the window. "Just look at the quality of the cut, the brilliance of the stone!" Clapping a hand on Dari's shoulder, he pulled her over to the proper angle to see the light coming through. "Here, girl, look at this. You just tell me if this isn't a lovely shade of pink."

She squinted her eyes and made a show of studying the stone from several angles. "Well, I guess it's pink enough. But it's supposed to be a gift to Aphrodite." She looked up at Lucama, all innocence. "Wouldn't she like more of a rose color?"

"The Goddess of Love?" the merchant replied, his thick eyebrows lifting upwards in surprise. "These are for her?"

Dari nodded, copying his wide-eyed expression, as if she herself was awed at the concept.

I had to stifle a grin at how well she was handling things.

"Well now," Lucama said, stroking his beard thoughtfully. "Since these rubies are meant for a Goddess, I might just have to give you a better deal."

When he quoted me a price, it was far more reasonable than I had expected. However, I couldn't let him know that.

"By Zeus' magnificent –-,"I started to swear, then stopped short, noticing Dari's presence and quickly changing the body part I had intended to mention, "Uh -- beard! Do you call that a proper price for these stones? You're insulting my intelligence, if you think I'll pay such an exorbitant amount." 

Of course, we went on from there, until we finally ended up with a price we could both agree on. It was mostly bluff and blunder, as is usually the way in business transactions. Nevertheless, I was entirely satisfied, especially since Dari's remarks had helped quite a bit. At last she had shown an aptitude for doing something useful. I even bought a nice ruby ring for myself, with the money I had saved on the other rubies.

As I counted out the dinars for Lucama, Dari asked softly, "Uncle Euphonius, may I go find Iolaus now?"

"All right. But don't forget about dinner at the tavern later on. And don't get in any trouble."

"Thanks, Uncle Euphonius! I'll behave," she said over her shoulder as she darted out the door.

Not too much later, the deal had been concluded and I had safely stowed the gems away with my things. I had strolled around the town, checking the place out, glancing into some of the shops and even making a few good buys here and there. Every so often, I happened to glance at my new ring, admiring it cheerfully. Like any good merchant, I love a bargain. And I do so much love shiny things.

It was just beginning to get dark as I headed for the Victory Tavern and the meal I was hosting for Iolaus and his friends. By now, I was having some serious misgivings about the wisdom of introducing Dari to what sounded like some pretty disreputable characters, but it was far too late to cancel the banquet. 

When I saw Dari coming up the street towards the tavern with Iolaus next to her, I was somewhat relieved, until a tall stranger holding a sword jumped out of an alley in front of them with a decidedly unfriendly shout.

Iolaus swung around, his sword rising to meet his opponent's. At the same time, he pushed Dari behind him, out of harm's way. The two men traded a few fierce blows, while I hurried forward, intent on getting Dari away from the fracas.

Iolaus tripped as he took a step backward, landing hard in the dirt. The stranger was on him immediately, the tip of his blade at my friend's throat.

I stopped abruptly, drawing out the throwing knife I keep in my boot. My arm was already back and in another heartbeat I'd have tossed the blade. Fortunately, I was now close enough to see them both clearly and to hear what they were saying.

The attacker had this funny sort of a smile on his face. His lips spread in a grimace so wide as to be almost a caricature of mirth, displaying clenched teeth. But the smile never reached his eyes, which stared with a kind of maniac glee, giving a definite impression of insanity.

Iolaus casually pushed aside the point of the sword. "Siann, don't smile like that, huh?"

"This smile is the last thing some people have seen," the madman replied calmly.

A shiver ran down my spine at the words, but the stranger broke the spell immediately by lowering the sword, pulling Iolaus to his feet, and hugging him tightly. As I watched the laughing and mutual back-pounding, I realized they had to be old friends, and the fierce swordplay had been play only.

Somewhat embarrassed at what I'd almost done, I slid my knife back into its accustomed hiding place and walked over to put a protective arm around Dari.

"You might have hurt the child with all that fooling around," I chided the two of them, eyeing the stranger coldly. He was taller than I am, which isn't saying a whole lot, and appeared to be about Iolaus' age. Short dark hair fell forward over a surprisingly delicate face. A somewhat stocky body, but not fat by any means. Not bad-looking, I decided, but nothing to cheer about.

The stranger favored me with a slight smile. He was clearly scrutinizing me also, as his eyes traveled up and down my torso, then landed on my face. "Don't be such a spoilsport," he said, in a voice far too high for his years. "We wouldn't have harmed the girl." Then he turned to Iolaus, draping one arm around his shoulders and clearly dismissing me from his thoughts. "C'mon, buddy. Let's go inside and have a drink. You did say you were holding a feast, didn't you?"

"Not me," Iolaus hastened to point out. "My friend Euphonius is paying."

"Just as long as it's free, I don't care. C'mon."

Iolaus didn't budge. "Siann, I think I'd better introduce you to our host." He glanced significantly at me. "Euphonius, I'd like you to meet Siann. She and I fought together in the war." 

I did a mental double take. She? By the Gods, this is a woman! I kept a totally neutral expression on my face, not wanting her to realize I had ever thought otherwise. If this was one of Iolaus' so-called friends, I was not impressed. Quite the opposite, in fact.

"Glad to meet you, Euphronius," Siann said, seeming not the least bit embarrassed by her faux pas.

"Euphonius, not Euphronius," I corrected automatically. I hate it when people mess up my name, since it means pleasing to the ear.

"Oh, sorry." She tried again, with almost sarcastic precision, "Eu-phon-I-us. What kind of a dumb name is that, anyway?" 

Have you ever met someone and taken an immediate dislike to them, whether or not later events proved you to be correct? If you have, then you'll know how I reacted to Siann. 

"My name literally means pleasing to the ears. My parents thought it sounded nice," I replied frostily. I wasn't sure if she even got the pun, but that's my standard answer to a question about my name.

"Let's go inside," Iolaus suggested, seeing us staring at each other in a less than friendly manner.

 

Once inside the Victory Tavern, I made sure that Dari was safely seated between Iolaus and me, still having serious doubts about the wisdom of hosting this little dinner party. If all of Iolaus' buddies were as uncouth as Siann, perhaps I shouldn't even have brought the child into this situation. But it was too late now. She clearly loved every minute of it, staring around wide-eyed at all of her "heroes".

Heroes indeed! I reflected, glancing around the crowded tavern. This ragtag bunch of scruffy, aging ex-soldiers didn't impress me in the least. However, I had no choice but to smile and act the part of the gracious host as Iolaus introduced a succession of his friends. There was much exuberant greeting and backslapping going on. One huge man caught Iolaus up in a fierce bear hug, actually lifting him clear off the floor. This was an even more remarkable feat when you considered that the man had only one arm. His other sleeve was folded up and pinned at the shoulder. Not only that, but he walked with a distinct limp.

Somewhat sheepishly, Iolaus introduced the one-armed giant as Vachon.

Once Dari had eaten her fill, she ran off and left me to sit and drink with the others. I saw her moving about the room, fetching food and ale for the various war heroes and listening raptly to their words. This wasn't working well at all. No, indeed. I should never have brought her here.

Siann had seated herself across the table from me. Woman she might be, but I noticed sourly that she had a man's appetite. She polished off the ale like a man also. Five empty tankards stood neatly in a line before her, and she was working diligently on draining the sixth.

"Hey, Euphorbia," she finally said, seeing me watching her. "How'd you get to be friends with Iolaus anyway?"

"Euphonius," I corrected sourly. The faintly mocking smile on her face told me clearly enough that she had deliberately screwed up my name, but I chose to pretend otherwise. "Euphorbia is a tropical plant."

"Oh, is it really?" she remarked innocently.

"Yes. And in answer to your question, I met Iolaus a number of years ago, when he came to my village to visit his mother."

Getting up from her place, she came around the table and sat down next to me. One arm draped around my shoulders, she played with a bit of my hair as she said, "So, Eponymous, you're kinda cute, I think. Whaddya say we get to know each other a little better?"

Surprised, I wasn't entirely sure if she was actually making a pass at me, or simply making fun of me.

"Siann --" Iolaus began warningly.

I waved him to silence, replying disdainfully, "Eponymous means an adjective relating to the person for whom something is named." I slipped out from under her arm. "And I think I know you well enough already."

"Oh, that's right. Your kind doesn't fancy women, do they?" She shrugged elaborately, then ran her fingers down the front of my tunic in what could have been a seductive gesture. "Too bad. Judging by the fancy clothes and that shiny red ring, you're pretty rich."

"Not by a long shot," I retorted, brushing away her hand. "Well-off, maybe. But I work hard for my dinars."

"Oh, I'll just bet you do, Sweetie." 

Everyone within hearing distance laughed at the interchange, but I was getting madder by the minute. I found "Sweetie" even more obnoxious than the ways she had purposely mispronounced my name.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you it's not polite to insult the person who's paying for your food and drink?" I replied icily.

"Insult you? I try to pick you up and you get all huffy about it? Ha, Euphorius, old boy, get a life!"

Damn her, she'd done it again! "Euphonius," I corrected patiently, as if to the village idiot. I was not going to let her know that she had gotten my goat.  
She just laughed and reached out toward me again. 

Iolaus caught her hand. "Siann, enough already. Leave him alone."

Their eyes met, and I saw the flash of something beyond just friendship. Unwanted jealousy flared in my heart. Siann and Iolaus? No, surely not!

But she backed off, whether in response to his words or just because she had had enough of teasing me, I didn't know. "Okay, buddy, okay," she told him lightly. "Eucalyptus here is just such fun to tease, that's all." 

As I bit my tongue so as not to respond to yet another deliberate insult to my name, Siann returned to her original place across the table, blew me an elaborate kiss, then flagged down the serving wench for another tankard of ale.

At least I was rid of her harassment for the present. My anger began to subside. As I took a few slow swallows of my own ale, I caught a bit of conversation from a couple of men sitting not far away, easily recognizing the speaker as the big man who had lifted Iolaus off his feet earlier on.

"Trojan War. Humph!" he was saying. "A waste of life. All those men dead, and for what? Because one king's wife ran off with another king. Never should have fought a war over that."

After all these years, they were still re-hashing the politics of the war? I stifled a yawn. How dreadfully boring! Iolaus didn't seem to be saying much. I had expected that he'd be more garrulous in the company of his old friends. Now that I thought about it, he had been rather guarded and withdrawn during the entire meal. Definitely not like him.

"Vachon, we were just soldiers," another man objected loudly, drawing my attention back to the discussion. "That wasn't up to us to decide."

"Then who is it up to, Myka? We fought, we died, and what happened? We came home, and no one wanted us around. They all just wanted to forget it ever happened." He held up his empty sleeve. "Well, how about me? Am I supposed to just forget this? By the Gods, I wish I could!" With his good arm, he pounded a fist down on the table. "Remember what Ajax said about the ones who didn't have the guts to fight beside us, but now had the nerve to spit on us? Well, he was right! Even here, the damn civilians in this town would be happy if we'd all just die of old age."

"That's not true," the other man objected. Myka had medium-dark skin, and long hair knotted behind his neck. He was tall, and impressive. I had the feeling that he had been extremely handsome in his youth, since he was still very attractive now. He looked maybe 35 years old, so he must have been quite young when he had fought at Troy. "The townspeople know that it's only fear of us that keeps Tellis' pirate gang away."

Pirates? Had I heard him mention pirates? And in the present tense? Alarmed, I kept a sharper ear on the conversation.

"Yeah, well," Vachon replied. "But I still remember how the Corinthians told us we'd been fighting for so long that we were nothing but a bunch of thugs, and that we couldn't leave the fighting behind."

Siann stopped her steady drinking to join in the dispute. "Well, isn't that true, to some extent? We're not civilians, and we don't think like civilians." She grinned. "After all, who'd want to think like them? Bunch of cowards and wimps!"

I thought I caught her looking at me out of the corners of her eyes as she said that. But I kept silent, telling myself I had too much dignity to respond to the insult of a drunken ruffian.

When Vachon griped again about the attitude of some of the folks of Gargatha, the talk turned toward the past, and the way the townspeople had once given them respect and honor for keeping pirates and bandits away. Eventually, they likened the present situation to what had happened in Corinth some years ago, when King Iphicles had given them trouble, throwing some of them into the prison of Golgoth. I knew the basics of the story, of course, so I found it pretty dull. I was listening for more mention of pirates. Hearing nothing, I finally grew impatient. I leaned over towards Iolaus and asked him in a low voice, "You know anything about Tellis the pirate?"

Unfortunately, I hadn't spoken softly enough, since Siann took it upon herself to answer my question.

"You're interested in Tellis, eh? Yeah, he's a pirate all right, and a nasty one. You'd better hope he doesn't decide to attack us while you're here, Euph. I don't think you'd like that at all."

I winced at being called by a shortened form of my name, but didn't bother to object. I was far too concerned about what she'd said. I turned once more to Iolaus. "You didn't tell me about this when you recommended we come here."

"How could I? I didn't know about it. I thought it was all in the past." He shifted his glance away from me, as if he really wasn't too happy about the situation. I'd have bet that his friends had told him already, but he had kept quiet, not wanting to worry me over something that was, after all, only an unlikely possibility.

"Don't worry," Myka said, scowling at Siann. "Nothing's going to happen. Tellis has enough sense to keep away from Gargatha. There are more than enough other towns for him to raid."

"Not too many as prosperous as we are, though," Siann put in, with a leering wink at me. "But don't worry, pal. Me and my buddies will protect you."

"Thank you," I told her coldly, before I addressed the others heartily, and possibly slightly sarcastically. "With such an illustrious gathering of heroes and warriors, I'm sure I have nothing to fear."

A laughing chorus of assurances greeted my remark. Vachon raised his ale and proposed a toast to their host, which I graciously accepted. 

Although the grin on Siann's face was less than respectful, she joined in with the cheers, then drained her tankard and waved for another one. And yet, she truly didn't act drunk. The annoying woman seemed able to down an incredible amount of alcohol without showing any obvious effects. Had I drunk that much ale, I'd have been passed out under the table.

Iolaus surprised me by reaching across to touch Siann's hand and saying, "Don't you think you've had enough?"

"I can never have enough," was the cold sober and very bitter reply.

"Why do you do it?" He waved at the empty tankards lined up neatly in front of her.

She shrugged and added one more to the lineup. "It's the only thing that keeps the nightmares away."

"I fought in the same war you did, and I don't have nightmares." He hesitated. "Well, not very often, anyway."

She fixed her eyes on his. "No two people ever fight the same war, Iolaus. You should know that. What I did, what you did, what Myka did, isn't the same at all."

"But --"

"There are no buts. You're free to come to terms with it however you can, pal, but let me do the same." She took more ale from the serving wench's tray and lifted it high. "This is what works for me."

Iolaus persisted. "Ajax once said that a good soldier never surrenders, but he always recognizes the enemy when he sees him, and sometimes, that enemy is within." He eyed the ale significantly. 

Siann didn't like that insinuation at all. "Give it a rest, buddy. I'm warning you." Then her tone changed, as she looked closer at the sincere concern in Iolaus' eyes, where she might have expected to see blame. She smiled a bit, to erase her threat. "No, sorry. But I am asking you. Leave it alone."

He gave up the argument. Siann drained the entire tankard, then got to her feet and walked out the back door of the tavern, almost certainly to visit the outhouse after all that ale.

As I frowned at her departing back, Iolaus asked me softly, "You don't like her, do you?"

I laughed. "Now, whatever gave you that idea?" 

"Siann's not bad, when you get to know her," he hazarded.

"That's what you say. To me, she's a rude, obnoxious bitch, and I want nothing more to do with her."

"If you knew what happened to her in the war, you might be more understanding."

I was having none of it. "Hmph! She's not the only one who can cry about her war wounds. Look at Vachon over there. He's not nasty, and he looks to have been hurt far more badly than Siann was."

"Euphonius, you really don't know what you're talking about."

"Why not?"

He dropped his voice even lower. "It isn't what was done to her that bothers Siann. What haunts her is what she did to others."

Well, that did throw a bit of a different light on her behavior, but it still wasn't a very bright light. "What did she do?" I asked, more out of curiosity than true caring.

Iolaus looked distinctly uncomfortable. "She never talks about it. Only a few of us know, and I don't think I have the right to say anything more than I have already."

"All right, granted that Siann did some horrible stuff. It was a war, and that happens. Other people learn to forget about it and move on. Why can't she?"

"Maybe -- because she cares too much," he replied unhappily.

That didn't make a lot of sense to me, so I changed the subject. When Siann returned, she spent the rest of the evening avoiding me, much to my relief.

By the time the feasting and drinking were over, Dari was curled up alongside me on the bench, asleep with her head in Iolaus' lap. He had to carry her up to our rooms. 

 

When I awoke next morning, Dari wasn't lying beside me on the bed the way she was supposed to be. However, it being fairly late, I assumed she had gotten up earlier and gone off somewhere.

Despite a fine breakfast at the inn, I was not in the best of moods and a bad headache from last night's drinking was doing absolutely nothing to help the situation. I ventured outside, wincing as the bright sunlight assaulted my poor eyes. I figured Dari had gone to the big field on the far edge of town that I had noticed as we rode in being used as a practice ground by our illustrious band of warriors. I dragged my unwilling feet in that direction, trudging past the shops and homes and up the rise.

Yep, there they were, people exercising in groups or alone, or whacking at each other with staves or swords. I thought I saw Dari's small figure in the crowd that was watching Siann beat the shit out of her hapless opponent with a heavy staff. The noise of the wood cracking together reverberated through the relentless pounding in my head. I took a deep breath, willing the pain to ease off before I had to go stop the girl from making a nuisance of herself.

Iolaus sat leaning against a tree, munching on some brown bread and sipping now and then from a bottle he held in his left hand. I walked over and plopped down alongside him. From his half-hearted smile, I guessed that his head wasn't doing too much better this morning than mine was. He broke off a chunk of bread and held it out to me.

"No, thanks. I ate already." 

He offered the bottle instead. "Here, try a bit of this then. You look pretty green around the gills."

"What is it? About the last thing I need is more alcohol."

"It's a herbal potion Siann mixed up for me. Cures hangovers, but it does take a little time to act, so be patient."

Without too much hope of a miracle cure, I took a swig from the bottle, then made a face. "Tastes awful."

"That's not the point. It works. Trust me."

"Iolaus, my dear man, considering all we've been through together, how could I possibly not trust you?" Perhaps the potion truly was working, since my thoughts had shifted from my own misery to the pleasure of being here with him.

"That's the spirit. Lean back and enjoy the fresh morning air."

"Umm." The fresh air wasn't what I was enjoying. Sitting here with him, now that I could enjoy. In fact, I had to be careful not to let myself enjoy it too much or risk embarrassing myself. Then the clash of wood on wood brought me back to the present situation with Dari.

"Well, your idea didn't work very well, did it?" I began.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that Dari hasn't decided not to be a warrior, despite seeing all these people. Just look at her." I waved my hand in their direction. "She's over there staring at Siann."

Iolaus glanced in the direction I had indicated. "There's something wrong with that?" he remarked at last.

"You know full well that there is!" I said, more sharply than I had intended. "This isn't the lesson she was supposed to learn!"

"Ever consider that we may have been trying to teach her the wrong lesson?" he said diffidently.

I sat up straighter, all thought of relaxation gone. "What are you talking about?"

"You're not gonna like this, but there's always the chance that she does have what it takes to be a warrior."

"Rubbish! She's a child."

"And how old do you think I was when I started training?"

I fell back on my last line of defense. "She's a girl."

"Say that one more time, my friend, and I'll hit you upside the head," he said with a grin. "Besides, Xena was a girl."

"Now you're starting to sound like Dari!" I exclaimed in exasperation.

"Euphonius --"

"No, no, no! Absolutely not! I won't let my little girl grow up like that."

"She's not your little girl," he replied gently. "She's Ysabel's daughter. In fact, in a few more years, she won't even be a child anymore. She'll be a woman, and she'll be making her own decisions."

"She's the closest thing to a daughter that I'll ever have." No sooner were the words out of my mouth than I realized they were true. I had always been distantly fond of the child, but these last few days in her company had brought us closer together, despite our clash of opinions. "I don't want her to get hurt, that's all," I concluded lamely.

"I know. But you can't choose her life for her. She's the only one who's entitled to do that."

I sighed wearily and closed my eyes, knowing I was getting the worst of this discussion. "So what do you suggest?"

"Ever hear of Cheiron's Academy?"

"Cheiron the Centaur?"

"Yeah, but he's dead. Jason runs it now."

"So I've heard. But that's not a proper school. It's a training ground for mercenaries."

"Well, not exactly. Herc and I went there when we were young, you know."

"No," I replied absolutely, already sure I knew where the conversation was leading. "That's not for Dari."

"But --"

"I said no!" 

Furious, I got to my feet and stomped off, but I didn't get far before I had to glance back over my shoulder to see what effect, if any, my leaving had had on Iolaus. All he did was take another swig of his herbal hangover remedy.

Shit! I wanted him so badly, but sometimes I just hated his guts. And maybe the second feeling was nothing more than a reaction to the first. Euphonius, you monumental asshole! 

Well, at least we'd be leaving Gargatha tomorrow. If things were no better with Dari than they'd been before, they were also no worse. And besides, my headache actually was beginning to subside, just as Iolaus had promised it would.

I strode around the practice field for a while, letting my anger fade away along with the pain in my head. When I had calmed down a bit, I went to gather up Dari, intending to take her with me as I went in search of good buys in the marketplace. She had done so well with Lucama that I was anxious to teach her more of the fine points of bargaining, and maybe a bit about judging the quality of gemstones.

I wasn't pleased to find her engaged in a serious conversation with Siann. As I drew closer, I could hear what they were saying and my displeasure increased dramatically.

"Please, Siann! Teach me how to fight," Dari pleaded.

"You're just a baby, child. Go home. Find yourself a different life."

"No, I want to be a warrior. Like you."

Siann shook her head. "You're too young to know what you want."

"I'm not. I can do it. I know I can."

By that time, I had gotten up next to them. "Take the lady's advice, Dari. She knows what she's talking about."

I had come up behind Siann's back, so she turned when she heard my voice and gave me a look. I took Dari's hand. "Come on with me and we'll go to the marketplace."

"No, I want to stay here." She pulled away from me.

I'm not too proud to stoop to a little bribery now and then. "Come with me and I'll buy you something nice."

"Will you buy me a staff?" Dari asked hopefully.

"Certainly not! I had in mind something nicer, like a ring or a necklace."

"Then I want to stay here."

Siann laughed. "Looks like you can't buy her off so easily, little merchant." Putting one hand on Dari's shoulder, she went on, "All right, girl, if you're so determined, I'll show you a few moves."

I got the distinct impression that the obnoxious woman had only offered to do it in order to spite me. 

"Very well," I replied shortly. Then I turned and stalked off by myself to the marketplace, muttering angry curses under my breath. This whole thing just wasn't working out as planned.

 

"Please, Uncle Euphonius! Just a few more days. Please?" Dari wheedled, as we sat eating a late dinner at the inn that evening.

"No. It's time we headed home. We've been here long enough."

"But I'm learning so much. I don't want to go yet. Just two more days?"

I glanced at Iolaus, hoping for some backup. He shrugged. "I wouldn't mind staying a little longer. There's plenty of time before I'm supposed to meet Herc."

"What about those pirates everyone was talking about?" I objected. "We don't want to be here if they decide to attack the town."

He just shrugged. "Tellis has more sense than that. The town's waterfront is pretty well fortified against attack. We're perfectly safe."

I threw up my hands in surrender, but the truth was I really didn't mind staying, even if it meant that Dari got to play warrior for a little longer. It also meant I could spend just that much more time in Iolaus' company. 

 

Next day, as I once again walked through the village that had been named for a prison, I wandered curiously away from the main thoroughfare and through the back streets. I saw a man without both legs, dragging himself around on a little wheeled platform. A woman passed me in the street, half her face twisted and destroyed by a burn scar. From a dismal little hut with a barred door, I heard someone screaming in the unmistakably accents of insanity. Outside the town, I stumbled upon an old graveyard and read the memorial stones, set up to honor comrades long dead. There were a lot of them, and the dates were from the time period of the Trojan War.

Looking at the names on the stones, and the occasional statue or face carved into the marker, I got a very clear feeling that I was walking through a country I could never understand in anything except an intellectual way. I had not been a part of the War. I had in fact never been a soldier of any kind. Oh yes, I had had a few adventures in my life and the face of death wasn't entirely unfamiliar to me. But I had never seen killing on a large scale, and never had to contemplate the blood on my own hands, only to wonder if it had been justified or not. Despite my expertise with a throwing knife and a certain amount of skill with a rapier, I had never been trained to use the weapons of a professional soldier.

I had never seen the face of my enemy up close, and realized, just before I killed him, that he was only a man like me. 

I had never laid my sword on Ares' altar and prayed for success in battle. 

I had never had to.

All these things, and more, had simply never been a part of my life. Perhaps I had been lucky in this regard. But it also made me a perpetual outsider in that world I now saw around me, reflected in the eyes of the men and women who had once stood before the walls of Troy and experienced, for ten long and endless years, the death and destruction of an ultimately useless war.

The only thing I could do was attempt to imagine it, while for them it lived on in their memories, and in their nightmares. I knew that now, from the conversations I had heard since I'd been in town. 

Peace can be very slow in coming, even after the battles are long over.

So all right, maybe these men and women deserved more sympathy and understanding than I had been willing to give them. Maybe they even deserved a bit of respect for what they had been through. But it was still nothing for a young girl to aspire to be, was it?

 

I was still thinking these melancholy and sobering thoughts when I passed the practice field and saw Dari out there sparring with Siann, with several other people gathered around to watch. I sighed and shook my head, and would have continued on towards the inn except that I saw Iolaus with the watchers. Just as I joined the group, Dari took a wild swing and missed her target completely, only to have her opponent whack her smartly across the back with her staff. Dari stumbled forward and fell face down on the ground from the force of the blow she had taken.

That was too much for me. Stepping in front of the fallen girl, I faced Siann and ordered angrily, "Stop it! You'll hurt the child."

Siann looked daggers at me. For a moment, I thought she was going to hit me with her staff also, but then she set one end down on the ground and leaned on it. "Don't worry, I won't do your precious little niece any real harm," she said with a slight sneer. "But I might hurt her a little, now and then."

"Well, that makes me feel just a whole lot better," I retorted sarcastically, holding my ground.

"You don't understand," Iolaus broke in, coming over to me. "Getting hurt is part of what happens. If Dari can't deal with that, she'll back out right now. If she can, then she'll learn what to expect."

"But --"

"I know, I know: she's just a little girl, right?"

"Right!"

Grabbing my arm, he turned me around to face Dari. "Look closer, buddy. Do you see a little girl?"

I looked. With blood oozing from her nose, she had stood up, retrieved her staff, and was once more in an on-guard stance, determined to continue the uneven fight.

"No, I do not see a little girl," I admitted unhappily to Iolaus as I wilted. "I see a warrior in training, and that doesn't please me at all."

While Dari smiled grimly, Siann raised her staff once more. With a glance at me, she asked scornfully, "What's the matter, Sweetie? Are you threatened by the idea of your little niece becoming more of a man than you are?"

I took a deep breath, stood as tall as I could, and tried to ignore her calling me "Sweetie" as I replied tightly, "You don't have to be a warrior to be a man."

"No?" She lifted one eyebrow. "Is that how you truly feel, or do you just have to say that to save your pride?"

I fixed her with a level look. "I'm not trying to protect my pride. I don't have to. I know who and what I am, and I'm not ashamed of it. Can you say the same?"

I had expected to nail her with that last comment, but I hadn't expected to succeed quite so well. A wildfire ignited behind her eyes and her lips twisted into that sick smile as she tossed her staff away. I never even saw her fist until it connected with my gut. As I doubled over, struggling to breathe, she hit me again in the jaw, rocking my head back and sending me sprawling on the ground.

As I tried to pull my wits together, I heard her shouting at me. "You despicable coward! How dare you say that to me?! Let me go! I'll kill that little misbegotten son of a sea whore!"

(So all right, maybe her actual words were a lot more descriptive than that, but I'm giving you the gist of what she said as politely as I can.)

As I finally managed to suck in some air, I saw that Iolaus was holding her back, along with two or three of the others. Dari knelt next to me, pleading for some assurance that I was okay. I took her hand and gave it a squeeze, which was about all I could manage at the time.

I glared at the furious bitch as Dari helped me sit up. Siann continued raving about what a wretch I was, while I continued trying to breathe. As soon as I could, I said in between gasps, "Oh sure, beat the shit out of me. That really shows how big and brave you are, doesn't it?" I was playing to Dari now. "Show everyone just what a brute and ruffian you truly are. Rage and violence. That's typical of your type, isn't it?"

Siann stopped struggling and went abruptly white in the face. When they let her go, she turned her back.

That freed Iolaus to rush over to me. "You okay?"

"I -- think so."

His fingers probed my midsection, looking for broken ribs. Then he turned my face up to him and gently explored the growing bruise on the right side of my chin, running his fingers along my jaw. "I don't think anything is broken," he concluded.

"No thanks to Siann, if it's not."

His eyes slid sideways for a moment in Siann's direction. "If she had wanted to kill you, buddy, you'd be dead," he said softly. "Do you think you can stand up? I'd like to get you back to your room so I can put a cold compress on your jaw before it swells up."

"Sure. I can stand. Just give me a hand."

He did. No sooner had I gotten to my feet than the world started turning black around the edges and I got that ringing in my ears that meant I was going to faint. My knees sagged, but I found myself gathered up into strong arms and held like a baby. Somewhere in the distance, a voice said, "It's okay, I'll carry him."

As my head cleared a little, I realized with dismay that it was Siann who held me. I would have protested, but I felt too dizzy. 

I heard Iolaus say, "Dari, go and practice with Vachon for a while, okay?"

"But Vachon only has one arm," Dari replied uncertainly. "What can he do?"

"More than most of us can do with both arms. Go on now and do as I say." 

The girl looked to me for confirmation. I could do little more than nod. 

Reluctantly, she obeyed.

"Come on," Siann said. "Let's get him back to the tavern."

 

Jogged around as I was, the trip seemed to take forever, but I was at last in my room, mercifully at peace and lying on the bed. Siann had taken out a small leather pouch and was sorting through it, as Iolaus held a cold cloth against my jaw.

When Siann approached the bed, I frowned and drew back. "No. Go away. You've done enough damage."

"Euphonius, she's trying to help."

"Don't care. Make her go away."

"I won't hurt you," Siann replied, with uncharacteristic tenderness. "If you put these leaves under your tongue, you'll feel better."

I glared at her suspiciously.

"I know what I'm doing." She looked away. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I over-reacted."

Still wary, I nodded and opened my mouth, wincing at the pain that shot through the side of my face. The leaves tasted terrible, but after a little while I really did start to feel better.

Siann disappeared briefly, then came back in the door with a cup in one hand and a bulging wineskin in the other. She held out the cup in my direction. "Here. It's nice cold water, laced with a bit of wine. It'll restore your spirits."

"My spirits were just fine, until you attacked me." I grabbed the cup and sipped a little. I was starting to feel like my old self again, but I was still pretty angry.

"Look, I said I was sorry."

I took another sip. "Sorry? And you think that makes it all well? Life doesn't work that way, lady."

I'd have sworn she winced at that. In fact, as I looked over the edge of the cup at her face, I saw a dreadfully bleak expression come into her eyes.

"I know," she said softly, turning away.

Iolaus glanced at me and shook his head briefly. Then he surprised me by going over to the woman and putting his arms around her, drawing her into a comradely hug. She overtopped him by a head, which seemed rather amusing to me at the time. 

"It's all right, Siann," I heard him murmur. "It's just that he doesn't understand, that's all."

Surprised, I thought I saw the glitter of a tear in her eye as she allowed herself to lean against him and rest her cheek on his shining hair. I was beginning to feel guilty about harassing her, until I saw her bend down a little and kiss him full on the lips. 

When the kiss went on far longer than it decently should have, I decided I was not feeling quite as guilty as I had before. Once again, I wondered if they had ever screwed around together. 

I debated the merits of just ignoring them as opposed to interrupting them. Interrupting won, hands down.

I cleared my throat loudly. "All right, you two. Enough of that."

Despite my pleasure at making them break off the clinch, I saw a dangerous gleam in Siann's eye.

"You mean you don't like to watch?" she asked archly.

"Not particularly." This whole thing was making me distinctly uncomfortable.

Still looking at me, she slid a hand under Iolaus' vest and ran her fingers mockingly down his bare chest to his belt buckle. "I think you'd just love to watch us. In fact, I think you'd love to do just about anything that involves my pretty blond buddy here, wouldn't you?"

She had read my feelings all too well. "Him, yes," I retorted. "You, no."

"Sure you won't change your mind about that, Sweetie?" Her hand strayed lower, reaching for the leather of his codpiece.

Iolaus had finally had enough. He grabbed her hand and moved it firmly away. Or at least that's what I think he was trying to do. Siann let him move her hand all right, but she kept ahold of his hand and pressed it squarely onto one of her breasts. I saw his eyes widen and he drew in his breath.

"Siann –-" he started to protest. 

With a wicked smile at me, she stopped his protest by kissing him again.

When Iolaus finally broke loose and came up for air, I was burning with anger. Or was it jealousy? Or, then again, maybe it was just lust? There was virtually nothing Iolaus could do in the way of sex that wouldn't turn me on, Siann notwithstanding.

"Wanna put this bed to better use than nursing a barely-injured man?" she asked him mockingly.

Damn the woman! She was watching me over his shoulder and grinning!

Iolaus pushed her away and held her at arm's length. "Cut it out. This isn't funny."

"Maybe it's not supposed to be funny," she replied. "Maybe it's supposed to be an invitation." She flashed me an even more wicked grin. "How about it, Sweetie? Maybe you'd like to lie there and watch us? Or maybe you're up for a little action yourself?"

By now I was indeed up for something, despite my bruised ribs and aching jaw, but I had no clue as to how to interpret her words. A mocking challenge, or a genuine offer? I decided to play into it. "Watching or acting, either one is fine with me," I replied, matching her arch tone.

The woman laughed, but Iolaus just shook his head. "Siann, do you mean this for real? Or are you just playing games?"

"Darling boy, have I ever passed up a chance to make love to you?" she answered sweetly.

"Well, no, but --"

Once again, she turned to me. "I'll leave it up to our rich little friend then. What do you say, Sweetie? Are we serious?"

"Oh yeah." I was more than willing to admit to my desire for Iolaus, but I tried to keep it at that level. No way did I want this vicious bitch to realize just how much he really meant to me. If she did, I knew full well she'd find a way to turn my feelings into a mockery.

Iolaus, on the other hand, knew how much I cared for him. I just prayed he wouldn't let her know, if anything came of this outrageous flirting. It was almost with relief that I heard him say, "Siann, I'm really not in the mood for all this right now."

"No?" Boldly, she placed her hand on his codpiece again. A startled look came over her face and she removed her hand. "You aren't kidding, are you?"

"No. I'm not."

"What's wrong?"

"I don't know."

"Yes, you do. What is it?"

"These last few days, being here, remembering so many things . . ." He let his voice trail off. "I just haven't felt very –-" He grinned a little. "—amorous."

Siann glanced over at me, almost conspiratorially. Then she sat down on the side of the bed. "I rather think we could fix that if we tried, don't you?"

Not sure what she was up to, I replied, "Uh -– perhaps."

"No perhaps about it, Sweetie."

I didn't bother to react to the name this time. I had more important things to think about. Was she actually trying to maneuver us all into bed together, or was I imagining things?

"What if we bury our differences and work together on this? How about it? Want to kiss and make up?"

"I'd sooner kiss a raw fish," I growled.

She looked at me disgustedly. "Ha! You think I want to get it on with you? You probably don't even know where to put it, with a real woman."

I couldn't let her get away with that. "You'd be surprised what I know about women," I replied haughtily.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really!"

"I suppose you think you could get me off? Come on now." 

I gave her a narrow-eyed glare. "If I wanted to, I'll bet I could. But if you think I want to, you've got another think coming."

She drew herself up and sneered. "The man doesn't live that I can't handle, and make him like it, too."

The tension between us fairly sparkled, as we faced off against each other. Siann glared at me, and I glared right back at her and growled, "Oh, you think so, do you?"

Iolaus laughed. "You know, you two are actually rather funny," he said.

We both deflated visibly at this comment. Siann was at a loss for words, but I managed to say, "Funny?!"

"Yep." He sat down on the bed. "Okay, since you both seem to be determined to make this into a contest, how about we set up some rules, huh?"

As we continued to stare at him, he explained further. "Euphonius, you don't like Siann very much and you don't usually screw women. Right?"

I nodded my head.

"And Siann, you enjoy teasing Euphonius, and don't particularly like him either. Yes?"

She nodded. 

"But you both think you're pretty good in bed?"

He looked at us. We both nodded vigorously, not to be outdone by the other.

"Okay then," he concluded, "you each get a chance to make the other come. Whoever is successful gets the prize."

"What's the prize?" I asked, almost sure I knew the answer.

He grinned. "Me."

By now, I had pretty much forgotten my bruises. This could just possibly turn into something good. However, remembering Iolaus' earlier reluctance, I asked, "You sure you want to do this?"

"Yeah, I think so." He shrugged and his grin turned rather sheepish. "Maybe I'm not quite so –- disinterested as I thought I was."

"I'm game if you are, then."

"Who goes first?" Siann asked warily.

"Flip a dinar?" Iolaus suggested.

We did. I won the toss. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad.

"Okay now, play fair," Iolaus admonished, moving over to perch cross-legged at the head of the bed. "And may the best man and/or woman win."

I heaved an exaggerated sigh and moved closer to Siann. "All right. Let's get this over with."

All she gave me in reply was a disdainful snort, as she crossed her legs and folded her arms across her chest. I could tell this was going to be a challenge of the first order, but if this was what I had to do in order to have sex with Iolaus, then so be it.

Deliberately keeping my body from touching hers in any way, I knelt behind her on the bed and began to gently massage her neck and shoulders. Now and then, I allowed a finger to stray toward her ear, or up into her hair, or around to the side of her face, always gentle and teasing. The woman had muscles that would make a man proud, but by the time I was finished, those muscles had lost a good bit of their tension. My hands grew bolder, moving further down her back and around to the front of her body, but only to her taut abdomen and never underneath her clothes. Softly, my lips brushed her neck. I cautiously nibbled an earlobe, checking to see if I could do so without hurting my bruised jaw. Yep. No problem there. Guess I wasn't hurt all that badly after all. I went on to kiss her cheek and the edge of her eyelid. I never kissed her full on the mouth, but I covered just about everything I could reach from my position behind her on the bed.

It was all coming back to me now. All the little tricks and touches I had learned long ago in my youth, during the time I had spent with the Widow Twanky. All the many things she had taught me about making love to a woman, and the ways to read a woman's desire. There was nothing hard about any of this, nothing any man couldn't do, if he was willing to be patient and ignore the urgings of his cock. In my case, there were no urgings to ignore, which worked entirely to my benefit.

I could tell I was achieving the desired results when she sighed and let her head fall forward, allowing me better access to her neck. That was when I allowed my hand to touch her breasts, moving from one to the other, holding, squeezing, rubbing the stiffening nipples through the rough fabric of her tunic, as she began to make little squirming motions, pushing her chest into my stroking hand.

Smiling secretly to myself, I simultaneously drew Siann back down onto the bed and deftly untied the drawstring on her trousers. She made no protest as I stripped her of her pants, leaving her tunic to cover most of her body, but exposing her crotch. I slid down to the floor, kneeling beside her legs, which still hung over the edge of the bed. At first, she kept her legs crossed, still trying to squelch her desire, but after my talented mouth had licked and sucked her thighs for a time, and my seeking fingers had probed as far as they could into her groin, she opened herself to me, eyes closed, head thrown back, lost in her own sensations.

I moved between her outspread legs, parting the folds of heated flesh and licking at her eager clitoris with light, teasing flicks of my tongue. As she thrust herself up into my face, I got more fully into it, sucking and licking more strongly, but still carefully. An occasional twinge of pain shot along the side of my face from my jaw, but I ignored it, too intent on winning the contest.

Oh yes, I know how to do this. I've always found it distasteful, but so are a lot of other things in life. Telling myself sternly that sometimes one must do what one doesn't particularly like to do, I bent all my efforts to bringing Siann to a climax, using my hands on her straining breasts as skillfully as I was plying my tongue on her nether regions.

It didn't take very long to produce the desired effect. She moaned, gasped, squirmed, and cursed at me, but she came, and she came hard.

I sat up, grinning at Iolaus. There was a hair wrapped around my tongue and I considered spitting, but decided that would be just too rude. Instead, I discreetly removed it by wiping my sleeve across my mouth.

Iolaus, meanwhile, kept a solemn and serious look on his face as he held up a finger and announced, "Score one for Euphonius. Your turn, Siann."

She was still catching her breath, but she gave me that mocking false smile and said, "I never thought you had it in you, Sweetie."

I fixed her with a smug glare as I got up off my knees. "Never assume that a man is incapable of doing something, just because he usually chooses not to do it." 

Her hand snaked out to my crotch, where she couldn't help but notice my limp cock. She shook her head. "Not even turned on, huh? Well, we'll have to do something about that."

Now it was my turn to cross my arms. I was pretty damn confident that no woman alive could make me hard, if I didn't want it to happen. "Go ahead. If you think you can."

But instead of trying to caress my sagging manhood into stiffness, she gave me a crafty look and moved up alongside Iolaus, who now sat tailor-style on top of the pillows at the head of the bed. She took hold of his vest and began sliding it slowly down off his shoulders.

"Hey!" I protested. "No fair! You're not allowed to touch him unless you win the contest."

"Look closer, Sweetie. I'm not touching him. I'm touching his clothes."

I glanced indignantly to Iolaus to render a verdict. He smiled and shrugged. Okay, so it was legal.

With a triumphant grin, Siann went on to remove his boots, at the same time tugging him down onto the bed so he was lying beside her. Very careful not to actually touch his skin, she unhooked his belt and began working his leather pants down over his hips.

I closed my eyes, determined that her ruse wouldn't work. Unfortunately, my imagination supplied the details, even if my eyes couldn't. This wasn't helping. I gave up, opened my eyes, and relented far enough as to sit down on the edge of the bed, partly to hide my growing erection.

I realized that Siann had stopped right where she was when she had seen me refuse to look, and was now taking up where she had left off. Still making an elaborate show of not quite touching Iolaus, she continued to pull his leather pants down over his hips. The little traitor even helped out by lifting his body up far enough to make things easier for her! I'd have been angry at him, if I hadn't been so entranced by the amused expression on his face, not to mention the tufts of blond hair already showing at his groin.

He gave a long sigh as the edge of his trousers cleared his erect cock. Or maybe I was the one who sighed. I'm not entirely sure. The only thing I was sure of was that my cock was by now just as hard as his. Score one for the scheming wench who stopped her efforts to undress Iolaus and smiled at me gloatingly.

"Come on, Sweetie. Lie down and get comfortable. You can take off your clothes yourself, or you can let me do it."

Bowing to the inevitable, I stripped quickly and laid down next to her, determined not to react to anything she might do. I willed my cock to stop being so eager, but, with Iolaus still lying half-naked on the far side of the bed, that was a losing battle right from the start.

For a long moment, Siann just sat there, raking my body with her eyes. "Not bad, for an old dude," she finally concluded.

"Hmph! I doubt I'm that much older than you are," I retorted.

"Perhaps not." The vicious creature continued to look at me, as I firmly squelched the impulse to squirm.

"Could use more muscle," she remarked at last.

I didn't even dignify that with an answer.

"Now, how do you like it, Sweetie?" she persisted. "Do you prefer to lead, or follow?"

Not wanting to make things any easier for her, I didn't answer that either.

"Cat got your tongue? Okay, guess I'll have to find out for myself."

With that, she swung her leg over me so she was sitting on my thighs, then grabbed my hands and pinned them down at my sides. As soon as I got over my surprise, I tried to pull loose, but I'm ashamed to have to admit that she was not only taller than I am, but also stronger. Of course, it doesn't take a whole lot to be stronger than me, but still –-

She leaned forward, and for a moment I thought she was going to kiss me. But she didn't. Instead, she did as I had done to her, licking and kissing at the unbruised side of my neck and shoulders. My cock was pressed between our bodies, and seemed to be enjoying its position, much as I insisted that it not do so.

When she latched onto one of my nipples, I couldn't suppress a moan. And when she discovered that I enjoyed having her bite and suck hard on my chest and shoulders, she went at it even more enthusiastically. Her tongue became a small darting flame, scorching everything it touched as she moved here and there, first licking and then attacking viciously.

My eyes were closed and my head thrown back against the pillow. I was still trying to will my cock to stop its eager straining when she raised herself up and sat down on top of it in one swoop.

All right, so I was fucking a woman, even if she was the one doing most of the work.

My mind still insisted that I would not come, but the rest of my body disagreed strongly. In the end, as you might have guessed, my body won the argument, especially since I was so very conscious of Iolaus' presence, and the knowledge that he was watching us. The best I could do was to refrain from making any sounds that might indicate enjoyment, even as I emptied myself into Siann.

Satisfied, she got off of me as if she were dismounting from a horse, grabbing for a towel that hung near the bed and wiping herself off quickly and efficiently. After that, she tossed the towel at me so I could do likewise. 

Doubtless as a result of post-orgasmic mellowness, I almost admired her deliberately nonchalant attitude towards the whole thing. Now that I thought about it, I realize it was only Siann's sexual pushiness that had landed us all in bed together in the first place. I'd never have come on to Iolaus so flagrantly myself.

"It's a tie," Iolaus declared cheerily. "Looks as if you both get the prize."

Siann and I looked at each other for a moment. Then, making common cause, we both pounced on Iolaus, dragging off his boots and removing his trousers completely. At that point, I must confess to being rather uncertain what to do next. I simply was not used to having a woman as part of the action. 

Siann, however, seemed to have some ideas. "So we both win?" she asked sweetly, as she moved up alongside Iolaus, kissed him hard on the mouth and simultaneously slid him down further towards the foot of the bed. Breaking off the kiss, she let her eyes wander down the length of his body thoughtfully. There was a strange tone to her voice as she said, "Now, how can we share a treat like you?"

"How about I just lay back and let you two have your way with me?" Iolaus answered cheekily, looking from one of us to the other. 

I was staring hungrily at his still-hard cock, not entirely happy with the situation.

"Go on," Siann encouraged me. "I like to watch sometimes, too." 

Well, performing for a woman wasn't my usual style, but it was far from the most outrageous thing I had ever done in my life. I moved between Iolaus' legs and ran my hand up and down his shaft. He closed his eyes and settled himself more comfortably on the bed. Slowly, while trying to ignore Siann, I tried to take his straining cock in my mouth, only to find that I couldn't open my mouth that wide without pain. With an apologetic smile, I went back to using my hand, along with my tongue.

"Oh, Euphonius, that is so good," Iolaus sighed, thrusting lightly with his hips. Siann leaned over, so he could take one of her breasts in his mouth. I was almost jealous as I watched him bite and tease the nipple. Siann made a happy noise, and leaned completely over him, taking hold of his wrists and raising his arms above his head.

As I worked harder on his cock, using my favorite twist and slide up over the head and back again, I was rewarded with a groan and another thrust of his hips. 

"Do you like that, buddy?" Siann purred. "Both of us together?"

She only got a groan in response as I weighed his balls in my other hand, gently squeezing the sensitive testes within. I was getting into it, almost able to believe that Siann wasn't there, until I felt Iolaus jerk against me and go completely tense.

"Siann, let me go," Iolaus demanded.

I heard her laugh, and looked up somewhat awkwardly. She had maneuvered him so far down on the bed that she could kneel above him, her hands locked hard over his wrists as she held his arms pinned down. For his part, Iolaus struggled against that inexorable grip, trying to free his hands. As he did so, the muscles in his arms and chest showed tautly under the skin. It was a rather nice view, from my position between his legs.

"Siann --" Iolaus warned. 

I left off my rhythmic stroking, wondering if he was really angry, or just pretending to be. My uncertainty must have shown in my face, because Siann said, "Don't worry, he enjoys it this way." She pointed with her chin to his cock, which was as hard as it had been before. Then she leaned over and bit his nipple, drawing a hiss and a groan from his lips. "There, you see?" she assured me. "Five minutes, Euph. If he's soft or still complaining, then I'll let him go. Deal?"

I looked at Iolaus, who was watching us but no longer struggling. I had to admit, seeing him held like that with his cock standing hard was a temptation that would be difficult to resist. I licked his cock and then ran my tongue around the head. He groaned and twisted, but the thing that gave him away was how he spread his legs when I did it.

I grinned at him. "You do like it, don't you?" 

"Sure he does," Siann answered for him, as she moved to his other nipple. 

That was when the real competition between Siann and I began. We both started seeing who could draw the greatest number of moans, groans, hisses or pleas from our helpless captive. It didn't take long before he was begging us to stop teasing and get on with it.

"Enough, you two! Please! I am not your private play toy."

"No, you're not," Siann agreed in a silky sweet voice as she pushed his head over and chewed on his neck until he moaned again. "You're the prize. So just lie back and enjoy the ride. Euph and I are gonna drive you nuts."

"Euphonius!" I corrected automatically. She just looked at me and grinned. 

"He's gonna do you now," she whispered to Iolaus, and I watched his cock jump just at her words. That was clearly my cue. I got up off the bed and retrieved the small vial of scented oil that I always carry with my travel supplies. Still a little unsure of myself, I held it up for Iolaus to see clearly. "You okay with this?" 

"Oh, fuck," Iolaus panted, but his squirming gave me my answer. No doubt about it, he was enjoying himself.

Coming back to the bed and leaning down, I kissed him, forcing my tongue deep into his mouth. I had never been this aggressive with Iolaus before. In fact, thinking back on the first time we'd met, he had usually been the one taking the initiative. There was something exciting about having him held down and displayed before me this way, and it was something that awakened uncomfortable feelings in the back of my mind. 

But I had no time to care about that now. I wanted him badly. I laid down on top of him. He squirmed again, clearly trying to rub his swollen cock against my groin. "Hold still," I ordered, and was almost surprised when he promptly obeyed.

For just this one brief moment, Iolaus was mine. He might never be so again, for who could know what life might bring? But for now, he was mine, and I kissed the supple skin of his chest, feeling hard muscle underneath. That's what I love about men: the hardness, the sharp edges, the power and strength. Not the mushy softness of a woman's curves and crevasses. Although I had to admit that there was precious little softness about Siann. Ah well, I reminded myself, she was the exception, not the rule.

When I was possessed by another man, I loved his power, his hunger, his need. And when I was the one doing the possessing, his strength was mine, his courage mine, his body mine. There would be no squalling infant nine months later, no tearful recriminations, no protestations of everlasting love. No, just a meeting of two equals, for pleasure, for lust, and maybe to strengthen the bonds between us, so we would be more than simply friends, but nothing less than fellow men. 

"You are being cruel, Euphonius," I heard him gasp.

Siann laughed darkly, and I found myself enjoying the game. I settled myself back between Iolaus' legs and pressed a finger against him. He relaxed, and as I entered him, Siann leaned forward to bite sharply at one of his nipples. Iolaus came off the bed, and nearly pulled completely away from me. 

"Darling, he ain't in the mood for wine and roses. Let's get this going," Siann stated crudely.

I almost balked, but then I went with it, and purposely pressed my finger on that spot deep inside a man that can cause such pleasure, as Iolaus writhed and twisted against my probing hand.

After several moments of this, Iolaus opened his eyes and for a moment I froze. I saw an anger there I hadn't seen since -- Dahok. 

"Fuck me," he ordered hoarsely.

"Do it," Siann said. I lifted his legs over my shoulders. Quickly slathering oil on my cock, I pushed myself into him without further ado. He cried out, which only served to encourage me further. His ass was hot and tight and I could feel him squeezing me.

It didn't take long for Iolaus to moan and spasm around my cock. And yet, the memories of Dahok continued to haunt me, even as I drove myself rhythmically into the willing body before me, struggling to reach my own release. That was then. This is now. This is Iolaus, not some monstrous embodiment of evil. This is Iolaus, a man I respect and admire with all my heart. This is Iolaus, for whom I would give my very life, if necessary. This is Iolaus, and he has offered himself to me. 

I cried out quietly as white lightning spread outwards from my cock.

When I came to myself, I was sitting back on my knees, while Siann leaned on her arms over Iolaus.

"You two are cruel and inhuman," he gasped and then started laughing. Siann and I joined him, as she finally released his arms.

As soon as we were off guard, Iolaus pounced. Grabbing Siann roughly, he flipped her over onto her back and rolled on top of her. "All right, woman," he growled menacingly, "From here on, you're going to do what I say. I know this was all your idea, so Euphonius can just sit there and watch you get what you deserve."

I thought sure she was going to toss him across the room, since she outweighed him considerably and had the strength to do it. In fact, I was prepared for just about any reaction from Siann except what she did. She relaxed in his grip and replied meekly, "As you wish."

"Hands above your head and keep them there," he said, then proceeded to arouse her with varying amounts of gentleness and pretended cruelty, until they were both going at it full force, with him on top for a change. 

I made a point of keeping any least hint of jealousy or resentment out of my face as I watched the two of them getting it on. I wanted to appear relaxed, maybe even happy, at seeing their mutual pleasure. The fact that I actually did find myself happy at observing their enjoyment took me by surprise. I really wasn't jealous. Could that be possible?

There was a couple of times that what they were doing almost but not quite bothered me, because it was just too close to things I'd seen Dahok do to other people while he'd worn Iolaus' body. I had to remind myself that Dahok had seldom had their full cooperation and consent, while this –- well, this was a game, as anyone with half an eye could clearly see. Nevertheless, it had turned me on then, and it turned me on now. I was soon avidly jerking myself off in time to their rhythm, and we all came again, pretty close to simultaneously.

Finally we collapsed limply together on the bed, catching our collective breath. It was only then that a terrible thought occurred to me. 

"Uh – Siann --" I began. "Is there any chance you could get –- I mean, we've both --"

She caught my drift and laughed. "Don't worry, I'm too old for babies, if that's what you're trying to say. Isn't that just like a man?" she asked the universe in general, shaking her head. "When it's all over, that's when they ask. As if there's anything they could do about it by then."

Iolaus and I tried our best to look sheepish and contrite.

She rolled off the bed. "I would like to clean up just a little, though. Where's the washbasin? Oh, never mind. I see it over there."

Fitting her actions to her words, Siann strolled across the room. She grabbed a towel, dipped it in the tepid water, and turned away from us in order to gain what little privacy she could, under the circumstances.

I slid closer to Iolaus and kissed him gently on the lips, then broke off the kiss, content to just smile blearily into his eyes. This would have been the time to say, "I love you", had it been something I wanted to say. It would also have been the time for him to say it to me, had it been what he felt.

He blinked, and the blue eyes loosed themselves from mine. "Uh – Euphonius --" he began softly, uncomfortably, a shadow crossing his face.

Deliberately, I put a finger on his mouth before he could say more. There were no "I love you's" here, and I knew it.

"No promises," I replied, more a matter of my lips forming the words than my voice actually saying them. None of this was anything I wanted Siann to hear. "But if you ever do need someone, I'll be there," I finished.

His lips tightened into that determined look he has. He nodded his head a fraction to show that he understood, just as Siann plopped down onto the bed again.

The sleepy daze of happy satiety fell over us then like a fleecy blanket, as we lay there entangled. Iolaus was the first to succumb and doze off, his head on Siann's shoulder while I was snuggled against his other side. The sore muscles where I'd been punched had begun to stiffen a little, now that I was in a condition to notice them again. I sighed.

Siann raised her head so she could see my face and said softly, "This isn't just screwing around, is it? You really care about him."

"Whatever gave you that idea?" I asked, still unwilling to make myself vulnerable to this woman.

"Oh, little things. Like the look in your eyes sometimes, or the way you touched him. Or the words that you seem to want to say, but don't."

"Okay, yes, I care. But he belongs to Hercules. I know that."

"So do I," she said, very seriously. "Too bad for the rest of us, eh?"

I sighed softly as I admitted, "Yeah. Too bad."

There was a thin film of sadness in her eyes as she said, "Maybe we do have something in common after all, huh?"

"Could be," I admitted. Then I couldn't resist adding impulsively, "Maybe more than you think. Look, I know I'm not a warrior like you are. But I've fought my own battles. I know pain, and I know what it's like to try to protect something, only to have it slip away no matter what I do." Dahok, my conscience whispered to me. Unwillingly, I added, "And I know what it's like to have to live with things I'm sorry that I've done."

She closed her eyes in what might have been a wince of pain, and nodded a fraction, then surprised me by reaching over and drawing a hand down my cheek in a gentle caress. "Go to sleep," she murmured.

I snuggled closer against Iolaus, enjoying the lazy, comfortable feeling that usually comes after sex. Even as I lay there, I couldn't help thinking just how very rare and precious this was. How often did I have his body close against mine, or feel the slight motion of his chest as he breathed, peacefully asleep and safe by my side? In that brief moment, I had all I ever wanted. But moments like that don't last, except in memory, and this one was no exception.

I was almost asleep when the urgent sound of a gong invaded my drowsy musings, repeated over and over. I tried to ignore it, but Siann's voice cried out, "Iolaus, get up! That's the alarm! There's trouble!"

Alarm? Trouble? Had I heard that right?

I sat bolt upright in the bed, no longer even the least bit tired. On either side, my companions were hastily pulling on their clothes and boots.

"What's going on?" I asked, searching belatedly for my own trousers.

Siann gave me her trademark mocking grin. "Why knows? Maybe it's those nasty pirates you were so worried about."

"Pirates?" I repeated stupidly.

"Yeah." She strapped her sword around her waist. "You know, those awful people who attack and raid nice little towns like ours?"

I turned to Iolaus, my eyes pleading for reassurance.

"Don't worry," he said. "It's probably nothing. You stay here while we check it out."

Then they were both gone, in a clatter of steel and boots going down the stairs.

As I got dressed, I thought about what Iolaus had said. But I didn't stay there, since I didn't know where Dari was, or what was going on. I splashed water into my face from the bowl on the nightstand, trying to force my muzzy brain to think faster.

The entire interlude had surely not lasted long. Outside the window, it was still light. Early afternoon, at the latest. Where would Dari be? That was easy: still hanging out with her heroes on the practice field. But they'd have gone to answer the alarm. Certainly, they'd have told her not to follow them, but would she have obeyed? I wanted to think so, but knowing Dari –

I set out to find the girl. People were running around the streets in a panic, women screaming for their children, and men and boys rushing this way and that, grabbing up makeshift weapons.

"What's going on?" I asked a boy, snagging him by the arm as he ran past.

"Pirates!" he gasped. "Tellis and his gang anchored their ship somewhere and are attacking us from the hills!"

He jerked his arm away and I let him go.

Cursing equally my own ill luck and my own stupidity in coming here, I fought my way along the street towards the place where I hoped to find Dari. I suppose I should have noticed that most of the townspeople were now running in the other direction, but I was too intent on my goal to pay attention.

The practice field was deserted as I stumbled up the rise, gasping for breath from the run. "Dari!" I yelled, in between trying to catch my breath.

A soft voice came from behind a nearby bush. "Over here, Uncle Euphonius. Quick!"

I discovered her squatting behind the bush, her staff across her knees and her eyes trained on the far end of the field, where I could hear shouting and the general commotion of a skirmish.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

"Shh," she hissed, not even glancing at me. "Vachon told me to hide and keep watch on their rear, then run to warn the town if things looked bad. Get down and out of sight."

Instead of taking her eminently sensible advice, I pulled her to her feet and started back towards the town. "We've got to get out of here."

But Dari dug in her heels. "Uncle Euphonius --"

"Come on! I don't want anything to happen to you."

"I can't just run away."

"Of course you can," I replied angrily, pulling even harder on her arm. "You're a child."

"No. I'm a warrior."

"Dari --"

I stopped when I saw a stranger appear from the side of the field, running toward us with a heavy club raised above his head.

Without thinking, I whipped the knife out of my boot and threw it at him. 

And missed. Oh yeah, I hit him, but only in the arm, not in the chest, as I had intended. An arm wound won't stop someone.

I was so surprised at my poor aim that I stood there staring at him for too long a moment before I turned to Dari, shoving her toward the town and telling her fiercely, "Run. No arguments. Go!"

I started to turn back to face our attacker, but something heavy and hard came down across my back, and I fell. As I rolled myself into a ball, the club smashed into the arm I had covering my head, then fell again and again. I could do nothing, under the fierce rain of blows. When it stopped, I fully expected to feel a sword thrust through my body.

 

Without warning, the pain was gone, and I seemed to be floating, looking down at myself, with an armored man standing over me, sword drawn. I wondered quizzically if I was dead yet, or just about to be. Then I saw Dari running at my attacker, shrieking like a banshee, her little dagger in her hand, held low in a proper fighting stance. "No!" I tried to say, but no sound came from my mouth. "Run! Run! You can't win!"

I struggled to move, but could only float motionless. Then it all began to spin around, faster and faster, and I found myself falling down a long, dark tunnel, panic-stricken. There was a faint light somewhere up ahead. I was moving toward it. With an effort, I fought down the panic and concentrated on the growing light. Images flashed through my mind, images from my life. They went so fast that I could hardly take it all in, but the most important moments seared themselves into my mind as they flew fast. Some part of me decided this was my life flashing before my eyes, and I was being asked to make a judgement of it. 

You'd be surprised at the things that turned out to be on the positive side of the ledger. And also some of the negative things. Not always what I had thought, if you'd asked me about it before all this happened.

I hit solid ground, rolled a bit, then came to a stop.

Cautiously, I climbed to my feet. I was in a dimly lit cavern of stone, with a dark river flowing sluggishly through it. I took a few steps forward, marveling at the stalactites hanging from the shadowy ceiling high above and the massive stalagmites jutting up from the ground. When nothing awful happened, I moved on towards the river. Hearing a strange noise from the direction of the water, I squinted out into the mist hanging just above the surface and caught sight of a weird boat approaching the shore, with an even weirder person pushing it along with a pole.

I stood frozen in amazement as he brought his boat alongside the bank and stepped ashore. He was even odder up close, with a greenish face, large hooked nose, black lips and broken teeth. A ragged black cloak and hood covered most of his body and head, but his hands were gnarled and claw-like. 

Noticing me, he frowned then gestured toward his boat, and said grumpily, "Well, don't just stand there wasting my time. Get in. And you'd better have a coin for me. I don't do this for the fun of it, ya know."

I still stood there staring, unable to make sense of his instructions.

When I didn't comply immediately, he shook his head in disgust and muttered to himself, "It ain't fair. It just ain't fair. I'm expected to work my fingers to the bone, and half these mortals don't even have the foresight to bring one little coin along with them, to repay poor old Charon for his trouble. I gotta talk to Hades about putting me on salary, then I wouldn't have to put up with all these passengers thinkin' I'll take them for free, just out of the goodness of my heart."

The truth was beginning to penetrate my unwilling mind. This was Charon, ferryman of the dead.

"I – I don't have a coin," I said uncertainly. Recalling the ruby ring I had bought, I slid it off my finger and held it out to him. "Would you consider this instead?"

He turned his baleful gaze onto my hand and retorted, "A ring with a shiny pink stone? What, do I look like Aphrodite or somethin'?

"Uh –- no. Not really."

"Then what would I want with your fancy jewelry?"

"Well, it's worth quite a bit --"

"It is?" He leaned in closer, then drew back. "Wait a minute." Much to my dismay, he took hold of my arm, squeezing it in his clawlike fingers. Then he sniffed at me experimentally. "Why are you wantin' to cross the Styx anyway? You ain't dead yet."

"I ain't? Uh – I mean, I'm not?"

He took another sniff, then shook his head. "Definitely not. Don't smell dead. I can tell." 

"You're sure I'm not dead?" I replied, more in surprise than relief. After all, my last glimpse at my body hadn't boded well for my survival. I wouldn't have been the least bit surprised if Dari turned up here soon also, judging by what had been going on.

Shaking his head impatiently, Charon retorted, "Nah. Close maybe, but not dead."

"Then how come I'm here?" I waved my hand at the rocky cavern surrounding us. Maybe I should delay a while, in case Dari did appear. 

"Dunno." He glowered at me, perplexed. Then he thrust his awful face close to mine. "OK, buddy. What are you trying to pull? What's a live mortal doing at my ferry landing? Is this some kind of surprise inspection the boss is pulling on me? Checking up on old Charon? What's the story, eh? 'Fess up."

I backed away. "I don't know. I'm as puzzled as you are. Really."

"You ain't working for Hades?"

"Oh, my goodness no! Never met the fellow." And don't particularly want to, although the God of the Underworld is said to be quite attractive.

Charon seemed stuck on that piece of information. Then he made a decision. "All right then, if you're not dead, you're wastin' my time. Go on now," he said, making a shooing motion with his hands, "Get outta here!"

"Where am I supposed to go?"

"Back where you came from. Shoo! Away with you!" 

He turned his back on me and started for his boat.

Frustrated and irritated, I grabbed his dingy black cloak and tugged on it insistently.  
"Wait a minute. I don't know how to get back." 

As he swung around to face me, strange visions danced through my head. Images of blood and battlefields that I had never known personally. The memory of being beaten, just before I found myself here. Faces of old warriors, blinded, mutilated, limbs missing, bodies twisted in constant pain. And the certain knowledge that there were fates worse than death, like living with your mind already dead, raving in a locked room, or just staring out at an empty world from an empty soul.

Maybe it would be wiser to quit while I'm ahead, now that I know there truly is some sort of existence after death. There was always the possibility that I had a good chance at the Elysian Fields right now, but who knows what could happen later in my life? If I went back, I might screw things up entirely, even if it turned out that I recovered fully from whatever wounds I had taken.

I shook off these unencouraging thoughts and added, to Charon, "I'm not sure I want to go back, even if I could."

"Huh? Why not, buddy?" Shaking his head, he muttered to himself, "Most mortals cry and carry on when they find themselves here, and this one doesn't want to leave." He tapped his head with a knowing gesture. "Crazy."

If I were to get any sort of help from the old man, I would have to explain my hesitation. 

"I was in the process of being beaten pretty badly when I found myself here. How do I know I won't go back and just have to suffer all kinds of pain and stuff, then just die again in a few days? Or worse, live as a demented cripple?" I shuddered at the thought of such a thing. "Maybe I'm better off out of it all, at this point."

"Yeah, sure. And you'll love it in Tartarus, I suppose?"

"I – was rather hoping for the Elysian Fields," I replied diffidently.

"Ha! They're all hoping for that, pal. But they don't all make it."

"Really? That seems rather unfair."

"Hey, I don't make the rules. I'm just the ferryman." Nevertheless, he seemed taken aback by my question. The twisted, blackened face contorted into an even more macabre expression that could have indicated a hidden pain. "You really want to know the truth about that?" he asked me, with what seemed an attempt at confidentiality.

"Yeah."

"There really ain't very many people in Tartarus. You haveta be pretty evil to earn that kinda punishment." 

"But what about all those stories --?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know all that. You mortals just love to exaggerate, don't you? Even so, didya ever actually count up how many people they're about?"

"Well, no."

"Not very many, I can tell ya that for sure." He glanced around, as if afraid of being overheard. "Don't tell no one, but Hades ain't a bad guy, for a God. He can be pretty merciful, if you ask him nice and don't piss him off."

"Thanks. I'll keep that in mind." I held my hand in front of me, ostentatiously examining the ruby ring I still held. If he liked coins and valuables, maybe a little bribery would get me even more information. "You don't happen to know who goes where, do you?" I asked casually.

"Me? 'Course not! Like I said, I'm in charge of transportation, not judgement."

"Oh." Clenching my fist around the ring, I stood there hesitantly. The Elysian Fields were supposed to be very nice, but still, could I be sure I wouldn't end up in Tartarus, even after what the old man had said about it being rather sparsely populated?

Much to my alarm, Charon put a hand on my shoulder, drawing me to the riverside to face his boat. "All right, make up your mind, pal. I don't have all the time in the world, ya know."

"But --"

"But, but, but!" He threw up his arms in exasperation. "Trouble with your kind is you think too much. It's very simple: you wanna stay here or you wanna go back? Which is it?"

The bloody images ran through my mind again, coupled with a vision of myself terribly mutilated, living out the rest of a short and wretchedly painful life. Or worse, living on for years with no real mind left, cared for only until my wealth ran out, then cast into the street to die a miserable death. 

I shrugged and tried very hard to keep any hint of self-pity out of my voice. "Maybe I should just stay, now that I'm here. There's really nothing to go back to. It's not like I have a family or anything. Nobody would miss me all that much."

Charon studied me, his eyes narrowed. 

With a gesture of one twisted hand, a scene flared into being next to us. Dari stood at my bedside, tears running down her face even as she attempted to put on a brave front. On the other side of the bed, Iolaus knelt next to my bandaged head, whispering in my ear, "Come on, buddy. Don't give up. You can make it." Were there tears shining in those blue eyes?

I heard Charon's voice, sounding almost kind now. "Nobody, huh?"

The pathetic picture dissolved, and I was standing once more on the shore of the River Styx.

Charon leaped down into his boat, waving up to me. "OK, sure, there's nothing for you to go back to. So you just hop on down here and we'll be off. I've wasted enough time on this one fare already. Got lots more work to do." 

I hesitated.

"Come on, then," he repeated. "Don't stand there goggling at me! Give me that fancy little ring of yours and we'll be off."

I thought again of Dari's tear-stained face, and Iolaus' words. If that had been a true vision, at least they were both still alive and well.

Could it be possible that Iolaus really did care a lot about me, even if it was nothing like what he felt towards Hercules? In my mind, I saw again his taut body, stretched out on the bed between me and Siann. He'd enjoyed the sex, no doubt about that. But was there anything beyond that? Yes, of course there was. There always had been, even if it couldn't be called love.

And Dari. Wouldn't it be great to watch her grow up, see what kind of a woman she was going to turn into? Well, but I could see that from the Elysian Fields, couldn't I? Yeah, but I couldn't help her along, couldn't be really there to advise her or provide for her or anything.

But if I were to go back to my life, and be nothing but a mindless vegetable? Did I really want Iolaus to remember me that way? And would I be any use at all to Dari? Was it worth the risk? 

Charon cleared his throat impatiently and I knew I had to choose, one way or another.   
"No," I said, stepping back away from the waiting boat. "I – I think I'll stay."

The ferryman shrugged elaborately, then pointed at the far end of the cavern. "Up to you, pal. Just head on back that way, and you'll get there."

As I turned and started walking, the world began to fade to black around me. The last thing I heard was that irascible voice behind me saying, "I lose more fares that way." A gruff chuckle. "Oh well, less work for old Charon. I can use the rest."

Then I saw before my eyes the bedside scene that Charon had showed me, and it felt as if I were being pushed back into my bruised and beaten body, being forced once more into a cramped and uncomfortable place.

The sudden pain in my head and in my right arm forced a groan from my lips. It took all my energy just to open my eyes, but when I did, I was rewarded by one of Iolaus' bright smiles and a sharp exclamation of joy from Dari. She fell on me, hugging me as best she could, while Iolaus' smile grew wider.

"Hi, buddy," he said.

I winced at the enthusiasm of Dari's hug on my bruised body, as things came into focus. My right arm was tightly bandaged and bound across my chest. If I had to make a guess, I'd say it was broken. I seemed to hurt all over. My head throbbed, and I could feel a bandage wrapped around it. But my thoughts seemed to be in good order, and all my fingers and toes moved when I tried to wiggle them. Relief washed through me like a flood.

"Hi, yourself," I replied weakly, as Dari's tears ran down onto my shoulder. I tried my best to smile.

Iolaus held a cup to my lips. "Here. Drink some of this. Siann left it for you, in case you came around. It'll help clear your head." 

I sipped dutifully, but my mind was on other things. "You'll never guess what happened to me. I was at the River Styx and I talked to Charon! I thought sure I was dead. I --"

I started to describe what had gone on, words tumbling chaotically over each other.

"Euphonius?" Iolaus interrupted, before I had fairly launched into my tale.

"What?"

"You're babbling," he said with the smile that could light up even Hades' dark domain.

"I am? No, you don't understand. It really happened that way."

"Sure, it did," he said in the same tone used to humor a madman.

"But –- but you've been there, haven't you? You've seen --"

The expression on his face warned me to drop it even before his voice told me, "Yeah, I have. But experiences in the Underworld are best kept to oneself. What happens there is for you alone to know, not anyone else."

"Oh."

Siann walked into the room, in the middle of my thoughtful silence. She placed one hand on Dari's shoulder, as she took in the fact that I was clearly back with them and in fairly decent condition.

"Dari saved your life, you know," Siann said. "She stabbed the guy who attacked you, then kept him occupied with her staff until Iolaus and I could get there."

"Are you serious? Dari beat that big lug who almost killed me? You have got to be kidding!"

"Uh-uh."

"But how could she --"

"She knew what she was doing; he didn't. No mystery there. Besides, he made the mistake of not taking a child seriously as an opponent."

"But she's so much smaller."

"Yeah," Iolaus broke in, smiling as always. "In case you haven't noticed, so am I."

He had me there.

"If you'd taken away that dagger, back when we found out she had it," he went on, "I doubt Dari would have been able to defend you with only her staff. You'd have been dead, buddy. You realize that, don't you?"

"Yeah," I was forced to conclude reluctantly. I looked at the girl with more appreciation. 

She beamed proudly at all the praise she'd heard, then laid her hand on the hilt of the knife at her belt. "This is going to be my offering for Ares, when we get to Corinth."

At that, Siann laughed loudly. "Ares? You'd give your only weapon to that son-of-a-bitch?"

Dari stared in surprise, but Iolaus just nodded sagely and suggested to me, "Speaking of Gods, as soon as you're up to it, I think we ought to make an offering to Athena, for our success against the pirates."

"Athena?" Dari exclaimed incredulously, then went on to ask the question that was on my lips also. "Why her? What's wrong with Ares?"

Siann gave another harsh laugh. "He's not the God of real warriors."

"But isn't he the God of War?" I pointed out.

"War and being a warrior don't always go together." Dari still looked puzzled, so Siann went on, "A warrior is someone who's trained and prepared to use force to defend what he or she thinks is right. That doesn't mean you can't be wrong, of course. It only means you have the training and physical power to do something. How you use that power is up to you." She gave the girl a questioning glance. "You with me so far?"

"Yeah," Dari responded, sounding rather disappointed.

"Trust me on this, kid. You're much better off to be following Athena than Ares, if you want to make the right decisions about how to use your skills. Ares is supposed to represent victory and defeat, valor and cowardice, but if you look at it closer, Athena embodies the idea of wisdom, which springs from power and deep experience, and is produced in love and fear and pain. She endures violent confrontation only as a means to peace, or in defense of the innocent." Siann smiled and shrugged apologetically, as if she realized the lecturing tone that had come into her voice. "Besides, under his façade of bravery, Ares is a coward and a kiss-ass. Remember the way he betrayed the other Gods to Dahok?"

Iolaus' lips thinned at the mention of Dahok, but he nodded. "Yeah. The big, bad God of War was willing to sell out everybody else in order to save his own hide. Real brave, huh? You want to be like that?"

"I guess not," Dari admitted unhappily. Then her face brightened and she smiled. "But I want to be like you. And like you, Siann. So if you both say we should make an offering to Athena, then Athena it is. I'll give her my dagger."

Siann clapped her on the back. "Good girl! We have a temple right here in town. It's not much, compared to the ones in the big cities, but it will do."

I almost objected, but then I thought better of it. If Dari truly was determined to follow this path in her life, I'd much rather see her emulating Athena than Ares. I knew too well what Ares was like.

"All right," I said with a long-suffering sigh. "As soon as I'm up and about, we'll go to Athena's temple."

"That's the spirit, Euphonius," the woman agreed.

"Euphonius? You actually called me by my proper name? Sure you didn't make a mistake there?"

"No mistake. Dari told me how you faced up to that guy who beat the shit out of you, trying to give her a chance to run away," she said grudgingly. "Guess you're not entirely a wimp at that."

"Gee, thanks," I replied, keeping a light tone. I had a fair idea of how very much such an admission cost a person like Siann, and I didn't want to rub it in. Turning away, she busied herself with one of her little pouches of herbs, then handed me some of that pain-killing leafy stuff.

"Hey," I said, trying to talk as I placed the crumpled leaves under my tongue, "what happened with the pirates, anyway? We obviously won, but how?"

Siann, Iolaus, and Dari all tried to tell me the tale at once. From the chaos of enthusiastic descriptions of heroic exploits and military maneuvers, I gathered that the man who attacked me had been an advance scout for a flanking movement, which failed when he didn't return to warn the rest of the pirates that Iolaus and Siann were there, ready and waiting for them, having been drawn by Dari's screams and the commotion of her battle. In the ensuing confusion, the pirates were soundly defeated, their ship captured and burned.

 

By the time a day had passed, I was feeling much better. I was still in bed, but probably could have gotten up, had I wanted to. As it was, I enjoyed Iolaus' frequent visits, and his solicitude. There can be definite advantages to being hurt and bed-ridden, so long as one isn't too badly hurt to enjoy them. 

That evening, he brought me a bowl of stew and a bottle of wine. 

"Oh, but that looks delicious!" I exclaimed cheerfully. When I made a show of struggling into a sitting position, he came over and helped me up, which I didn't mind at all. Gave me an excuse to have his arms around me, if only briefly. Before I let him go, I added, "It would be nice if these pillows were plumped up a bit higher behind me."

Iolaus promptly took hold of one of the pillows and swatted me with it, very gently.

"What did you do that for?" I asked. 

By now, he was laughing. "Because I think you're milking this for all it's worth."

"Oh, you think so, do you?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well," I began indignantly, reaching for the bowl of stew somewhat clumsily with my left hand, "it just so happens --" I changed my tone abruptly and finished with a grin "— that you're right."

He took a swig from the wine bottle as he sat on the side of the bed, suddenly serious. "You need to talk to Dari."

"Why? What's wrong?" My attention was mostly on balancing the bowl between my legs and feeding myself with my only good hand. No easy matter, I assure you.

"The man she stabbed with her dagger just died. She's been going by to see how he was doing ever since you started to recover, and she's taking it pretty hard."

I was so surprised that I dropped a chunk of meat into my lap. "I didn't know --"

"We didn't want to tell you, since you were in no very great shape yourself at first. But it was a nasty gut wound and his death was slow and painful. Dari saw some of that. I didn't discourage her, because I know how much you want her to realize the downside of being a warrior, so --"

I held up my hand. "Don't worry, you did right."

"Yeah, well, anyway, now she's pretty upset, but she won't talk to me or Siann about it. I think she's trying to show us how brave she is, or something. I thought maybe you'd have better luck."

I set my empty bowl aside and took a sip of wine. "I'm not sure she'll talk to me either, but I'll give it a try."

He stood. "I'll go find her and send her up."

I nodded, worried.

It wasn't long before the girl appeared, carrying a plate with some sliced fruit. 

"Hi, Uncle Euphonius," she said, more subdued than usual. She set the plate on the bed beside me. "Iolaus told me to bring this to you."

"Thank you, my dear. Here, why don't you sit down and have some yourself?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Well then, sit down and keep me company while I eat." I took a fig and popped it into my mouth, as she obediently perched on the edge of the bed.

After a few abortive attempts to start a conversation that had been met with a morose syllable or two, I reached over and snagged my money pouch from the chair beside the bed. Bringing out a shiny coin, I held it out to Dari and said invitingly, "A dinar for your thoughts."

"My thoughts aren't worth a dinar."

"They are to me. Here. Take it."

She did, then licked her lips hesitantly before she spoke. "I'm thinking that death isn't really a very nice thing," she said, with a bitterness in her voice that I had never heard there before. 

"No, it's not." I thought back to my experience with Charon. If that truly had been a visit to the Underworld and life continued on after death, that provided a certain amount of consolation. Even so, dying isn't a whole lot of fun, no matter how you look at it. 

"But you know that already, Dari," I went on. "You stood by my father's funeral pyre with me. And you've known other people who have died."

"Yeah." Her voice grew softer, barely audible. "But I wasn't the one who killed them."

"Ah! That makes a difference, doesn't it?"

She nodded. One hand strayed down to the dagger at her side and she ran her fingers over the hilt. "I – I think I understand a little of how Siann and some of the others feel."

"Your quick actions saved my life," I pointed out.

"I know. And I wouldn't do anything differently if I had to do it again. But he was still a human being, just like you. Or Iolaus. Or me."

"Everyone you kill will be just another human being. And if you follow the path you're on now, you will have to kill again, sooner or later."

She nodded again, fingers still playing with the knife that had taken a man's life. "But Uncle Euphonius, if I hadn't learned how to fight, you would be dead. And without Siann and the others, the whole town would have been taken over by pirates and lots of other people would be dead."

"Uh-huh. But is that what you want your life to be like? Do you really want to be the one who does the fighting? And the killing? And maybe the dying?"

"I think so. At least, I thought I did. I'm not sure." She turned anguished eyes on me. "Oh, Uncle Euphonius, I just feel so awful!"

I reached out and hugged her against me with my good arm. "There, there, my dear. If you didn't feel guilty, there would be something wrong with you."

She held tightly to me, but, much to my surprise, there were no tears. "I love you," she said at last.

"I love you too." Strange, but my father and I had said the same thing to each other, just before he died. Only now, I was the one making the reply. I smoothed her hair and kissed the top of her head. She held me for a second longer, then sat back.

Taking the wine bottle from the table by the bed, I held it out to her and said, just as I would have to another adult, "Here. You look as if you could use a drink."

She brightened at this grown-up treatment, then took a generous couple of swallows.

I looked at her, very straightforward and adult. "We'll be leaving for home in another day or so. Think about all of this carefully. You don't have to decide the course of your entire life just yet, you know. There's plenty of time."

"All right, Uncle Euphonius. I'll do that." A hint of a smile crossed her face. "May I have one of those figs now?"

I passed her the plate, entirely satisfied with the results of our little discussion.

 

The next morning, we went to Athena's temple, as planned. It turned out that we were not alone, since a good many of the other townsfolk were there, also intent on honoring the Goddess for their recent deliverance from the pirates. Iolaus had told me that the warriors who had actually fought in the battle had gotten their share of honors from the civilians as well, in the form of many feasts, celebrations, and individual monetary awards for valor.

As we stood amongst the crowd waiting to make offerings, Dari fidgeted nervously beside me, staring back and forth from the dagger at her waist to the statue of Athena behind the altar. I was pretty sure she didn't really want to give it up, whether to Ares or Athena. It had cost her a lot of hard work. It occurred to me that I could use that fact to my advantage. Offering a weapon to any God whose jurisdiction covered warfare was usually considered to be more of a commitment than other types of sacrifices, but I didn't think Dari realized that.

Awkwardly, because of my broken right arm, which was still strapped across my chest, I reached into my belt pouch and pulled out a gold coin. "Here," I whispered, slipping the coin into her hand. "Give this to Athena instead. It's worth a lot more than the dagger anyway."

She looked around from side to side to see if anyone had seen me give her the coin, then smiled and whispered back, "Thanks, Uncle Euphonius." 

As the line of worshippers moved slowly towards the altar, I congratulated myself on my success. Besides, I had also scored a point by showing myself to be sympathetic to her feelings. Maybe now she'd be more willing to listen to my advice in other matters. Maybe our little talk last night had eroded her desire to be a warrior. 

I said nothing more about it while we waited. Sometimes silence is the best policy. Let her convince herself that I was right after all. It could still happen. She could just make an offering to thank the Goddess for our safety, like everyone else was doing. It didn't have to mean anything more than that.

Iolaus and Siann were just in front of us in line, talking quietly to each other. I glanced around the crowd, seeing a few familiar faces. One-armed Vachon was easy to spot, towering above the others as he did. Myka stood next to him. 

Personally, I was rather bored. Athena isn't one of the Goddesses I usually deal with. Truth to be told, I try not to attract the attention of any of the Immortals most of the time. Much safer that way. 

By the time we finally drew near to the altar, my injured arm was throbbing unpleasantly and I felt just a bit unsteady on my feet. Too late, I realized I should have asked Siann for some more of those pain-killing herbs. However, not only was I determined to be here with Dari, but I also didn't want to show any weakness in front of Siann or Iolaus, so I said nothing about it except to wish that things would move along faster.

I couldn't hear Siann's prayer to Athena, but I saw her lay several gold coins on the altar. Iolaus, on the other hand, spoke loudly enough that I could make out several references to Xena and Gabrielle as he set down his offering. There were tears on his face as he turned away from the over-laden altar and joined Siann and me, where we waited beside Dari.

Our turn came next, much to my relief.

Without a moment of hesitation, Dari walked up and added her gold coin to the piles of other valuables already there. I expected her to move back quickly, so we could get out of there and I could go rest, but she stood for a moment, looking up at the statue of the Goddess behind the altar. The statue stared down at her sternly. Just life-size, it was a fairly realistic attempt to portray Athena, to my way of thinking. While beautiful, the oval face gave the impression of great dignity, not mere prettiness. She was depicted wearing a short skirt, with a tightly laced bodice above it, her hair done up neatly on her head. In her left hand, she held an ornate shield, while the other hand reached forward towards her supplicants. 

Much to my dismay, Dari placed her little dagger on the altar next to the coin.

Something changed in the atmosphere inside the temple. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, as if in response to some strange sort of energy. The statue shimmered with silver light, then seemed to come to life.

With a collective gasp of amazement, the crowd pulled back, leaving Dari staring open-mouthed at the Goddess of Wisdom herself. 

Out of all the riches piled before her, Athena took up the little dagger. Then her piercing gray eyes fixed on Dari, as she said, "Child, this dagger has tasted human blood. How has it been used? Have you dared to take a life at your age?"

The girl just stood there, too awed and scared out of her wits to answer.

"Forgive me, Lady," Siann said firmly, stepping forward to place herself next to the astonished child. "Dari has indeed killed, but only because she was forced to defend an unarmed man in danger of death, at the risk of her own life. Had Iolaus and I not arrived in time, the attacker might have killed them both."

"I see," the Goddess said slowly. Much to my relief, her face broke into a gentle smile as she turned her attention again to Dari. 

"Then you have acted properly, and with courage," she proclaimed. "Such a deed deserves a reward." 

Suddenly, the plain dagger in Athena's hand turned into something else: something longer and made of finer metal, with an ornate design on the handle. Next to it lay an embossed leather sheath, with a matching belt attached. 

Athena slid the knife into its sheath and held it out to Dari. "Wear this, child, as a symbol of your dedication to me."

Her face glowing, Dari took the offered gift, strapping it around her waist. "Thank you, Lady," she replied solemnly. "May I use it always in a manner acceptable to you." She glanced at Iolaus and Siann. "And may I never kill again, except in dire need."

I saw the conflicted look on Siann's face, as she heard Dari's words, and I thought I knew what she was thinking. Quickly, impulsively, I slid my ruby ring off my finger, stepped up to the altar, and laid it beside Siann's offering.

"Merciful Goddess," I said, "in your great wisdom, be mindful of another of your followers here and accept this in support of the battle she fights within her heart."

Athena apparently knew who I meant. Bending a stern and sorrowful gaze upon Siann, she leaned forward and addressed her so quietly that few others could hear. "My daughter, you know that there's no way to truly atone for the past. The dead cannot be brought back to life, the suffering cannot be undone, and the blood can never be truly washed from your hands." 

"Yes, Lady. I know that," was the sad reply.

"The only thing that can be done is to do good in the present, as best you can, in memory of the wrongs you have done in the past. Therein lies as much forgiveness as it is possible for a mortal to find."

A single tear ran down Siann's face. She nodded, but did not lower her eyes.

Athena's severe expression softened. She placed one hand on the woman's shoulder and said, so softly I had to strain my ears to make out the words, "You have done everything that could possibly be expected of you, Siann. Go in peace."

As the Goddess' form wavered, then solidified back into the statue, Siann looked up at me and smiled, a bright and genuine smile this time, not that mocking grimace she usually used.

I smiled back. Dari and Iolaus rushed over to hug her, but I stood aside, watching and thinking. No, the warrior life never had been, and never would be, mine. But did I have the right to so easily dismiss what the men and women of Gargatha had experienced, disdaining them as ruffians and trouble-makers, just because they reminded me of things I did not wish to know? Could I condemn their bitterness, their insanity, their violence, and their arrogance, when I had lived an easy and comfortable life while they were out there fighting to conquer Troy?

And if the war itself had turned out to be pretty useless, and the battles only dubious triumphs, did that detract from the courage they had shown and the hurts they had taken?

For what, after all, is a hero, if not someone who puts their life on the line in the service of something beyond merely himself, or herself, alone?

 

As we walked out of the temple together, I was turning something over in my mind as I listened to the talk going on around me. With the excitement over, I also found myself distracted by the renewed pain in my broken arm. I hugged it tighter against my chest with my good arm, wishing it would stop bothering me so that I could think clearly. I wanted nothing more than to return to my room at the tavern and rest, preferably with some of Siann's herbal medications to help me out.

Meanwhile, the conversation went on around me.

"Does Athena usually appear like that?" Dari asked, her voice still reflecting awe.

"Not usually, no. But now and then," Siann replied.

"But I'm just a little girl. Why would she bother with me?"

"Perhaps it's exactly because you are a little girl that she appeared," Iolaus suggested. "The rest of us – well, we chose our lives a long time ago. Athena knows us, but you're new to all this." Taking her by the shoulders, he turned her to face him square on. "Also, you're at a decision point. You've killed a man, Dari. You've had enough time to realize what that means. Do you truly wish to continue on the path you've started? Or would you rather go back and choose another life for yourself?"

This brought my attention firmly back to the present and away from my personal hurt. I held my breath as Dari bowed her head, then said softly with closed eyes and a catch in her voice, "I'll go on."

Not the answer I had hoped for. My hopes wilted. As Iolaus drew her into a hug, I sighed and gave in gracefully to the inevitable. "Iolaus, about that academy you mentioned a few days ago? The one Jason's running?"

Releasing the girl, he looked at me, a puzzled frown etching vertical lines between his eyes. "Yeah?"

"What would it take to get Dari into it?"

I saw Dari's eyes fly from the lovely new dagger at her waist up to my face.

"First of all, money for the tuition," Iolaus said guardedly.

"Not a problem."

His frown turned to surprise. "If you're serious, I'll be glad to give her my recommendation. I'm sure Siann would also."

Siann nodded.

"I'd appreciate that," I replied wearily.

"You mean it, Uncle Euphonius?!" Dari exclaimed. "Really?"

"Yes. As long as your mother agrees to it."

"Oh, she will! I know I can convince her." She threw herself at me, wrapping her arms around my waist and doing her best to squeeze the life out of my body, but still being mindful of my broken arm. "Thank you, Uncle Euphonius! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Don't thank me, my dear. Thank Athena. After all, who am I to disagree with a Goddess?"

Siann and Iolaus stood there, beaming at us and at each other. I think my face must have gone paler than usual, since Iolaus put his arm around my waist and said, "Come on. Let's get you back to the inn."

 

A couple of days later, as we prepared to leave, there were three horses awaiting our departure, rather than the original two. It seems that Siann and her friends had all chipped in to get Dari a mount of her own, now that it looked as if she'd need it to travel to and from the Academy. The new one was a gentle-looking grey mare, with a used but passable saddle. 

Dari was beside herself with joy when she saw her gift. I really thought I'd never get her calmed down enough for us to be on our way. She just kept hugging everyone and saying how she'd never forget them, not ever. Now and then, though, a different look would come into her eyes, a look that reminded me uncomfortably of the haunted expression I'd catch sometimes in Siann's eyes. My little Dari was an innocent child no longer.

No, I still wasn't overly pleased about the way things had turned out. But Dari was young. She might well change her mind ten times over about her future. And if she didn't? 

Well, if not, it was her life, not mine, wasn't it?

I sighed. If it was this hard for me to let go, how much harder must it be for the actual parents of a child? And yet, the child must be set free at some point, if it is ever to find its own true path.

Our plans were to stop at the Academy on our way to Corinth, since it wasn't far from the city. To that end, Siann had made up a scroll recommending Dari, while Iolaus would be with us to talk to Jason himself. If she were to be accepted, she would then go home and try to sell her mother on the idea. Dari was quite confident that she'd prevail, and I rather expected she might be right, especially with the evidence of a Goddess-given dagger and a new mare to back her up.

Iolaus swung up onto his horse, waving and whooping exuberantly at all his friends, who cheered back. 

I was about to mount up myself, hoping Dari would take the hint, when Siann strode over to me.

She measured me with her eyes for a moment, then slapped me heartily on the back, nearly hard enough to knock me down. "Hey, Euphonius!" she exclaimed. "Come back and see us sometime. Maybe I'll let you buy me another drink."

As I recovered my balance, I replied merrily, "Not a chance, you old battle-ax!"

"And since when is it an insult to be a battle-ax?" came the quick rejoinder. "It's a perfectly respectable weapon, you know."

We both laughed, then I looked doubtfully at my horse, wondering how I was going to get up into the saddle using just one hand. Realizing my problem, Siann laced her hands together, offering me a leg up. She didn't even make a remark about wimpy little merchants when she did it, but she damn near tossed me entirely over my horse in her effort to help.

Dari was still running about, hugging people and saying her good-byes. Iolaus caught Siann's eye, then jerked his chin towards the girl.

"I'll take care of it, buddy," Siann replied. I saw her trot over to Vachon and whisper in his ear, then he spoke to Myka. Before I realized what was happening, Dari had been lifted in the air and was being passed over the heads of the assembled crowd. With much hollering and cheering, they finally set her on top of her new mount. 

With a mischievous glance at Iolaus, Dari kicked her horse into a gallop and headed down the road. Accepting the challenge, Iolaus took off after her, while I followed at a more sedate pace.

As I watched them both disappear around a curve, it struck me that I wasn't hurting over Iolaus anymore. I still desired him with all my heart, but now I knew I hadn't lost him, not really.

I had to assume that he now believed I wouldn't hang onto him, or allow myself to be hurt by the fact that I wasn't the chief love of his life. After all, hadn't he freely chosen to have sex with Siann and me? Unlike several of our other encounters, it couldn't be written off as the result of drunkenness or desperation, since we had been neither. That meant it could well happen again, somewhere down the road.

Sure, there were no promises. But there are always possibilities.

Iolaus might well be with Hercules for the rest of his life, but even so, a part of him belonged to me, and always would.

I could be happy with that.

 

 

REMEMBERED A HERO

"You fought hard for your country, and you fought brave. You will always be remembered a hero."  
Hercules, in "War Wounds"

 

It all started when my housekeeper's young daughter came running into my room in tears, sobbing loudly.

"Dari, what is it? What's wrong?" I asked, wondering what could possibly have brought her to such a state. At all of thirteen years old, Dari was no crybaby. In fact, she was usually quite stoic and reserved, for a girl.

She threw herself into my arms, weeping against my shirt. "Oh, Uncle Euphonius! It's Xena and Gabrielle! They're dead!"

"Dead? How do you know? The last I heard, they were fine, and Xena had a baby."

"I was on my way home from school when I stopped to listen to a travelling bard. It must be true. He got the story from Joxer."

Half from curiosity, and half in an attempt to distract the child from her crying, I asked what had happened. Between sobs, she told me about how Xena and Gabrielle had been pursued by the remaining Gods. (Zeus and Hera had supposedly disappeared somehow, if you can believe that. I don't.) Finally, the two women had been driven over a cliff in a wagon, along with the baby girl. Gabrielle died in the fall, the infant when the wagon burned, and Xena, seeing what had happened, took poison and died in Ares' arms, despite the War God's efforts to stop her.

Assuming the tale to be true, Xena's death was a great loss to the world. She had always been a hero, fighting against injustice and cruelty, and inspiring hope in the common folk wherever she went. Pretty much like Hercules, in fact. But still, Dari's hysterics were a bit much, considering that Xena was a complete stranger.

"Why are you so upset, honey?" I soothed. "It's awful that such good people died, but you don't even know them."

Dari took a long and shaky breath, clearly trying to get her tears under control. "Xena's my hero. I want to be a warrior and fight monsters and bad guys, just like she did."

I'll be the first one to admit that I hadn't paid too much attention to my housekeeper's little girl over the years that she'd been with me, so I didn't know the child on much more than a superficial level. Not surprising, since I don't spend a lot of my time at home, given my profession as a travelling jewelry merchant. Now, however, what Dari said was beginning to worry me. She was a nice enough little kid, and I always figured she'd turn into a nice enough young woman, and then, someday, a wife and mother. Becoming a warrior just wasn't in the picture.

"I've fought a few bad guys and monsters myself, dear," I told her. "Believe me, it isn't all it's cracked up to be. It's pretty scary, not to mention just plain old hard work."

She pulled herself out of my arms and glared at me stubbornly. "I don't care. That's what I want to do."

I couldn't see letting her carry on with this absurd notion any longer.

"And what does your mother think of all this?" I asked reasonably.

She shrugged, as if Ysabel's opinion mattered little to her. "Mommy wants me to grow up to be like her, and learn to do all the things she does."

"So don't you think you'd be much better off doing as she says?"

"But, Uncle Euphonius, I thought at least that you might understand."

"I'm sorry, but I don't. Being a warrior isn't for girls."

"Xena did it, and she's a girl."

She had me there. "Let's just say that Xena was a very special girl. Most girls don't grow up to be like her."

"I will."

"I doubt it. Someday you'll find a nice young man and --"

"— and clean his house, cook his meals, and have his children, the way Mommy does for you." She stopped for a moment, considering. "Well, not having children maybe, but all the rest of it. I don't want to do that. It's boring."

What could I say? It did sound awfully boring, the way she described it. Not exactly what I'd want for my own life, but then, I'm a man.

"Your mother doesn't seem to mind," I replied lamely.

"I'm not my mother and I'm not gonna do it!" she retorted, hands on hips.

I fell back on that tired old cliché, which also just happens to be true. "You'll feel different about it when you grow up."

"No, I won't," she informed me emphatically. "Oh, you just don't understand!"

With that, Dari burst into tears once again and ran out of the room, much to my relief. I figured if I gave her a few days, she'd get over this silly notion.

 

I thought I had handled everything just fine, and was congratulating myself on being so good with a child who, after all, wasn't even my own, when she came up to me later that day while I was gathering things together for my travelling pack, looked me square in the eye, and asked, "Uncle Euphonius, you're going off again soon, aren't you?"

I nodded, wondering why she cared. Holding up my sea-green cotton tunic, I tried to decide between that and a heavier dark blue one.

"Where are you going?"

Definitely the cotton. Summer was coming and the days would only be getting hotter. "I've got to pick up a shipment of rubies, for a very special piece of jewelry I'm having made."

"Is that for the necklace you promised Aphrodite, after she helped you make that big sale?"

"Yep." I picked up the blue tunic and went over to hang it back in the closet.

"Why do you have to go get them yourself?"

"I want to make sure they're exactly right," I explained from inside the closet. "Pink rubies are difficult to find, but Lucama claims to have just what I want. He's an old man, not at all willing to make the trip here to Lydicea, so I'm going to him. If I like what I see, I'll deliver the jewels to the artisan on my way back."

"Will you be going near Corinth?"

As I came back into the main part of my room, I was sure she was driving at something with this persistent line of questioning, but I didn't know what it was. "Yes. That's where the craftswoman lives who'll be making the necklace."

"Will you take me along with you? I need to go to Corinth."

Ah! Now we’re getting somewhere!

"Why?"

"I want to make a sacrifice in Ares' temple."

"A sacrifice? Whatever for?"

"Ares is the God of warriors."

Oh, shit, not that again!

"No, dear," I corrected sharply. "Ares is the God of War. It's not the same."

"What's the difference? In the stories the bards tell, most of the warriors serve Ares, therefore he must be the right God for me." She crossed her arms and stared at me sternly, certain of her logic.

"Warriors aren't necessarily the same as soldiers, Dari." I sat down on the bed, all thought of packing gone from my mind.

"They both know how to fight, and they both have lots of courage," she replied firmly. "That's what I want to be. And I need Ares to help me."

"Uh –- you don't want to have anything to do with Ares. Trust me. I met him once, and it wasn't a real good experience."

Her eyes went wide. "You did? Wow! What did he do?"

I'd gotten her attention now, but I didn't particularly want it. Or, at least, not over this. "I can't tell you all the details, but it was pretty nasty."

"Uncle Euphonius!" she exclaimed in annoyance. "You can tell me. I'm a big girl now, not a baby."

"Yes, I know. But still --" I sighed, knowing I'd have to explain something about what had happened. "Remember Iolaus, from the other world, not the one in this world?"

"The cute little guy who gave my mother that fire-starting thingie, and later became a merman?" I nodded. "Yeah, I remember. I liked him."

"Well, Ares kidnapped him and -– uh –- hurt him."

"Really? How do you know?"

"I was with Iolaus at the time, and just sort of got kidnapped with him by accident."

Dari looked at me skeptically, then made up her mind. "If Ares hurt Iolaus, he must have had a good reason. The Gods know what they're doing, right?"

Now how could I answer that one truthfully, without destroying her faith in the Gods? And if I did that, her mother would be pissed off for sure. A pissed off housekeeper I did not need.

"Well, mostly they do," I temporized.

She nodded as if that decided the argument. "Then I want to go to Ares' temple in Corinth and ask him to help me."

I decided to try a different tack, since this one wasn't working. "Why do you need help from the God of War to be a warrior?"

Looking exasperated, she replied shortly, "Because I can't do it by myself."

"Why not?"

"How am I going to learn the fighting skills I need around here, in this silly little village? There's no one to teach me."

"You go to school in the village, Dari. That's what you should be studying, not how to hurt and kill people."

"I want to learn both." She crossed her arms and glared at me, the very picture of stubborn determination. "If you won't help me, I'm gonna run away."

Oops, this could be serious! I didn't want to have to scour the countryside looking for a lost child, especially when I was about to take off on an important trip. Besides, maybe taking her along would be a good idea. She was certainly old enough to start learning about the jewelry business. Possibly travelling with me would get her interested in it. She seemed dead set against marriage, so it wouldn't hurt if she acquired some firsthand knowledge of the outside world, since she might one day have to make her own way in it.

"Tell you what: if your mother agrees, you can come along, all right?"

"Great! And we can stop at Ares' temple on the way back?"

"Well, we'll see about that when the time comes. But no more talk of running away. Deal?"

She nodded and stuck out her hand. "Deal," she agreed as we solemnly shook on it. 

 

By the following day, everything was almost ready for us to leave. A message had been sent off to Lucama, advising him that I would soon be on my way. The blacksmith was putting fresh shoes on my horse. I had the supplies all packed, and the dinars I'd be carrying to make the payment if the deal went through were all carefully hidden in various places.

I was taking a well-earned nap when Dari knocked on the door to my room and announced, "You have a visitor."

Still groggy and half-asleep, I ran my fingers through my hair to smooth it into place, brushed the wrinkles out of my clothing, and stumbled out to see who it was that had disturbed my rest. As you may well imagine, I wasn't in the best of moods. Not until I caught sight of the man standing at the door, anyway.

"Iolaus! What a pleasant surprise!" I exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

He gave me his usual blinding smile and shrugged. "Visiting my mother for a few days. Thought I'd look you up while I was here."

Erytheia lived in Lydicea, the village just over the hill from my estate. In fact, I had first met Iolaus when he had stopped by to see his mother, many years ago.

I glanced around outside the door, expecting to find Hercules somewhere nearby. "Where's the big guy?" I asked with a smile.

"Oh, Herc promised Iphicles that he'd help him with some important negotiations that are going on over a peace treaty or something. Totally boring, and they don't need me. It'll probably take a couple of weeks, so I said I'd go off on my own for a bit, then meet him back in Corinth later on."

His voice was sunny and cheerful, so I don't know exactly what made me think there was more to it than he had so casually explained.

"Well, let's go to the tavern and have a bite to eat, shall we? I'd offer you something here, but my housekeeper had to go off to help one of the neighbor women, and I have no idea when she'll be back." I shrugged apologetically. "Ysabel's kind of taken over as the town midwife lately, since the last one died."

"The tavern's fine. Let's go."

"Wait a minute. I need to put on some nicer clothes. I just woke up and --"

He took my arm and dragged me out the door. "Don't worry, you look fine. Or at least no worse than I usually do. Come on. It's been a long time since lunch and I'm starving."

 

Several helpings of a spicy lamb stew and a few drinks later, we sat talking over old times at my favorite corner table at the small inn. Try as he might to sound cheerful, Iolaus had something bothering him. Underneath the bright smile, sorrow seemed to be lurking.

Eventually, he brought it up. "You heard about Xena and Gabrielle, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Real shame. My housekeeper's little girl is quite upset about it."

"Why?"

I shrugged carelessly. "You know how kids are. Xena was one of her heroes."

He thought that over for a minute. "You ever meet Xena or Gabrielle?"

"No, I'm afraid not."

"I did, many times."

"I know. I've heard the bards' tales."

He pressed his lips together. "Don't believe everything you hear. Sometimes the stories are grossly exaggerated. And sometimes, they miss things altogether."

"Care to let me know what they've missed this time? Or maybe what they've exaggerated? I've heard tell that you and Xena had a bit of a problem once."

"Yeah. But I forgave her for all that. Or at least, I tried to. It wasn't easy, watching her with Hercules, after what she'd done to me. But she had changed, and we did our best to get past that." He paused for a moment, and a vague smile came to his face, as if he were thinking wistfully of the past. "Gabrielle, now. There was someone I think I almost could have loved, if she hadn't been with Xena, and I hadn't been with Herc." He smiled up at me, securely back in the present. "It would have fit so well. You know, the two sidekicks of the two famous heroes, and all that? But Gabrielle was a sweet young woman, when I first met her. Life with Xena matured her, and made her different." He shrugged, trying to pass it off lightly. "Well, times change, and people change. It probably wouldn't have worked out, even if we'd both been free and interested enough in each other to have tried."

"So what's the problem?"

"What problem?"

"The one that's had you so down in the mouth ever since you arrived."

"I'm not –- I mean --" He scrubbed his hand over his face, then looked up at me. "Yeah, okay, I guess I haven't been my usual self, have I?"

"Not even close," I said. "Whatever it is, you can tell me about it."

He smiled slightly. "The news of Xena's death really got to Herc, even though they'd only been good friends for a long time now. I tried to console him, but it seemed like every time he looked at me, he remembered what had happened between Xena and me all those years ago. He never said anything, but I could see it on his face. That's why I was almost glad when Iphicles asked that Herc come and help him. I figured he'd get over it faster with something new to occupy his mind for a while."

"And maybe without you around to remind him of the past?"

"Yeah. That too."

"I see." I downed another draught of my ale, then went on heartily, "Well, Herc's loss is my gain. I'm sure glad to see you again. How long will you be staying?"

"Oh, just a couple of days. There are a few odd jobs my mother would like me to take care of. Pandion's a nice guy and a great poet, but he's not much of a handyman, I'm afraid. After that, I was going to go hunting for a bit and then sell the pelts. Herc may not worry about money too much, but I like for us to have a bit of cash when we're travelling." He nodded towards our savaged lamb stew and grinned. "Dinners are more reliable when you've got some dinars with you."

"I can well understand that." An idea struck me just then. "Maybe you'd like to come along with me on a business trip?" I suggested. "I've got to pick up some pink rubies, and would be very happy to have an escort on the way. I could pay you more than the worth of a few animal skins. Above and beyond your charming company --" I flashed him my best smile –- "I'd like to have you along for safety's sake. After that last little encounter I had with bandits, I'm being a bit more cautious than I used to be. If you and Hercules hadn't come along at just the right time, I'd've been dead."

"Yeah, I remember that." He changed the subject abruptly by asking, "So what are you going to do with pink rubies?" 

I got the feeling he was stalling for time, while he tried to make up his mind about my offer of employment, so I gave him the time he wanted. I told him about the rubies, and then had to recite the tale of my adventure with the other Iolaus and Nautica, and how they were happily living together in the ocean and already had a baby daughter.

"And that's how I came to owe a special gift to Aphrodite," I concluded. "Believe me, after the deal I struck with the ladies on Lesbos, I can well afford to have that necklace made up for her. The only problem has been finding enough pink rubies. I finally located a merchant who has what I need, but he lives in Gargatha --"

"Gargatha?" Iolaus interrupted me. "That seaport town a little ways beyond Epidaurus?"

"Yeah. You know the place?"

"Sure do. Got some old friends there, in fact."

"So come along with me, and you can visit them," I invited cheerfully.

"I don't know --" he replied, clearly hesitant to agree to what had seemed to me such an excellent offer on my part.

By now I thought I had figured out why. Things had gotten a little hot and heavy in the sex department, the last time I had been with him and Hercules. Maybe he was afraid I had designs on him, designs that he might not be particularly willing to draw. After all, inviting him to accompany me on a long trip, where we'd be alone together –-

Well, if that was the problem, I could fix it easily enough.

"Oh, did I forget to mention that my housekeeper's little girl will be going also? I'd really like to be sure she's safe."

Yeah, I was using Dari to try to convince him, but it was only the truth, after all. Iolaus and I wouldn't be alone together, since there would be a child with us. 

Whether or not I had guessed right, this consideration seemed to make a difference. Brightening up a bit, he asked, "How soon are you leaving?"

I revised my departure date quickly. "Three, four days from now. Will that give you enough time to finish what you need to do for your mother?"

"Yeah. Okay, count me in."

I raised my mug as if making a toast. He lifted his own, tapping mine and then drinking the rest of his ale. I did the same, and the sudden warmth in my heart wasn't only caused by the alcohol I had so quickly imbibed.

 

Four days hence, we were on the road. I had arranged for a horse for Iolaus also, so we were making good time. Dari rode behind me on my horse, her eyes wide with excitement as she started on her big adventure, but her mouth mostly closed by shyness in front of a strange man she barely knew, who nevertheless looked so much the same as the other Iolaus she had met and liked a couple of years ago. 

Dari's presence, combined with her unusual quiet, made the first day of travel somewhat strained and awkward, but she soon warmed up to Iolaus, who seemed to genuinely like children and did his best to draw her out, with a certain amount of success.

I found it a bit unsettling to watch the two of them together. It was clearly apparent to me that Dari was broadening her hero worship of Xena to include Iolaus also. This could be good or it could be bad.

 

By the second day, Dari had stopped doing such an excellent imitation of a clam. Now she was full of questions for her newfound friend. Wearying of her constant chatter, I let her ride behind Iolaus on his horse, instead of with me. At least that way one of us would get some peace.

When we made camp for the night, Iolaus went off to hunt game while I started the fire. Dari collected dry wood for me, then sat off by herself fiddling with something I couldn't quite see.

No sooner had Iolaus stepped out of the bushes carrying three fat rabbits than Dari leapt to her feet, holding a dagger in her upraised hand. With a playful grin on her face, she swung the knife at our returning hunter before I could stop her.

I don't believe he even recognized who it was, but simply reacted to something coming at him, dodging aside and grabbing Dari's arm. In fact, if he hadn't gotten a good look at her right then, he very likely would have gone on to break her arm. As it was, he merely took the dagger from her hand and released her.

"I was only kidding around," she said, staring up at the scowl on Iolaus' face.

"Shame on you, Dari. That's not how a true warrior acts," I chided her. 

Raising her head haughtily, she said to me, with a bit too much arrogance in her voice, "How would you know, Uncle Euphonius? You're not a warrior."

What could I say? It was true. I had fought no wars and won no victories –- or at least not the kind of victories she had in mind.

"Your uncle's right," Iolaus put in sternly, backing me up. "A real warrior doesn't launch a surprise attack unless she's prepared to follow through on it."

I gave Dari a "There! You see?" look as I asked her, "Where'd you get that dagger, young lady?"

"It's mine. Momma pays me to help her sometimes, especially when she has to go to a birthing." She looked at me warily, obviously afraid I was going to take it away from her. Clutching the knife tighter in her hand, she went on, "It took me a long time to get enough dinars, Uncle Euphonius. I worked hard for this."

My frown darkened. Iolaus laughed. "Hey, don't worry. There's nothing wrong with the kid carrying a dagger. Never know when it might come in handy, these days."

Even so, I debated confiscating the knife, then decided against it. Dari was a truthful child. If she said she had bought it honestly, then she had. It was not my right to take away something that belonged to her.

"Well, all right," I finally said resentfully. 

For his part, Iolaus asked the girl, "Know how to butcher a rabbit?" 

When she nodded, he pointed to the three rabbits he had killed and said, "Okay then, get busy. Let's see if you can handle that knife of yours."

Dari's smile lit up almost as brightly as Iolaus'. I don't think I've ever seen anyone skin and slice up rabbits with quite as much care and attention as she gave to the task that night, cheerfully demonstrating her skill with the sharp blade and beaming at any word of praise that came from her new hero's mouth.

When she was finished, she slid the dagger into a worn leather sheath and strapped it around her waist, glancing surreptitiously at me as she did so. I pretended not to notice.

 

Later on that evening, Iolaus and I sat around the fire together after Dari had reluctantly rolled up in her blanket and gone to sleep.

"Your niece is quite something," he remarked.

"She's not really my niece, you know. Just my housekeeper's daughter."

"Oh yeah. It's hard to remember that, when she keeps calling you uncle."

I shrugged. "She's done that for years. I never saw any reason to stop her."

"Oh no. No reason." He shook his head. "Feisty little kid, isn't she?"

"She's gotten it into her head that she wants to be a soldier. Xena's her hero." I glanced at him, and I suppose I looked as displeased as I felt. "If you haven't displaced Xena in her affections, that is."

"Nothing wrong with a kid having a hero," he replied with a disarming grin.

However, I was not ready to be disarmed just then. "Maybe not. But I don't want her growing up to be a warrior." 

"Why not? That's what I am," my companion pointed out. Whether or not he was insulted, I couldn't tell.

"No. You're a hero, and you travel around with Hercules."

"I don't see a whole lot of difference there, buddy," he replied.

"Well, I do." 

Wrapping my blanket around me, I lay down and closed my eyes, effectively ending the conversation.

 

It turned out not to be that easy to keep the conversation closed, however. Over the next few days, Dari took to spending all the time she possibly could with Iolaus, asking him about his adventures and hanging on his every word. Very quickly, it began to annoy me, but Iolaus didn't seem to mind. In fact, he appeared to be enjoying her admiration and attention.

Then it occurred to me that perhaps this was truly not hero-worship, but just a young girl's first crush on an attractive man. That notion made me a bit more satisfied, because it allowed me to dismiss the seriousness of this whole warrior business. However, it also filled me with a strange disquiet, and I couldn't quite put my finger on the reason. For me to be jealous of a child was patently ridiculous. If I wanted to be jealous, Hercules made a far better target.

The happy thought that Dari was really attracted to Iolaus and not to the idea of being a warrior didn't last very long. That very evening, we had barely dismounted when I caught the two of them apparently rough-housing together. My first impression was that Dari just enjoyed it because he was grabbing her and touching her, but then I saw them stop, and he began showing her how to do some of the moves. She listened with a sort of concentration I had rarely seen in a child, but her attention was clearly on the moves, rather than on the man.

"Dari!" I snapped. "Stop fooling around! There's a stream just through those trees over there. Go get washed. You're all dusty."

"But Uncle Euphonius, I'm busy now."

"Do as you're told, young lady."

With an exasperated glance in Iolaus' direction, she obeyed, heading for the trees as she stripped off her outer tunic.

Iolaus came over to me and started taking the saddles off our horses. "Something wrong?" he asked. "You're not usually so hard on the kid." 

Considering how I feel about Iolaus, I never thought that he could get me angry with him over anything. And yet, angry I was.

"You're encouraging her, damn it!" I replied. "You know I don't want her to be a warrior, but you're always egging her on."

"Since when?"

"Since you met her, for the Gods' sakes! Telling her all those stories of yours. Filling her head with ideas unsuitable for a little girl. Making her think she could do that kind of thing. And now even showing her how to do it."

"Hey, take it easy. Yeah, I've been talking about me and Herc, but have you heard all that I've been saying?"

"No," I was forced to admit. "She's always wanting to ride with you."

"Uh-huh. And you've been riding ahead or behind, so you didn't have to listen to all the chatter, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, for your information, I haven't just been telling her about the heroic and fun things. I've been giving her an accurate description of the downside of a warrior's life also: the danger, the fear, the pain, and the regret over some of the things you've done."

"Can't you just refuse to talk about all that? Try to discourage her completely?"

"Euphonius, my friend, you don't discourage something by refusing to discuss it. You know better than that," he replied gently.

"Yeah, I guess I do. I'm just so worried about her, and I don't know what to do."

"I've got an idea. How about if she meets some of my friends in Gargatha? Soldiers who fought in the Trojan War?"

"We won the Trojan War. Why let her meet the victors? I'd rather we show her some of the victims instead." I shook my head, having second thoughts. "But I guess that wouldn't work, would it? Troy is a long way away, and by now it's been rebuilt and everything. Oh well, so much for that idea."

"You're right about Troy, but you're wrong about Dari."

"Oh? In what way?"

"Showing her the killing and destruction probably wouldn't discourage her any more than my telling her about the disadvantages of a warrior's life. It would be far more effective to let her meet some of the victors instead."

"What good will that do?" I objected.

"Don't show her the losers. Show her the winners. Let her see what it is that she wants to be."

"Oh sure. So she can have even more heroes. I fail to see how that would help the situation."

Iolaus snorted and shook his head, as if he were amazed at my obtuseness. Then he asked, "You know anything much about where we're going?"

"Gargatha? What's that got to do with what we were talking about?"

"You don't know, then?"

"No, not really. Just that it's a small seaport town that's been growing quite rapidly in recent years. What else is there to know?"

"Ever hear of the infamous island prison that used to be not far from Corinth called Golgoth?"

"Yeah. So?"

"Well, Gargatha was deliberately given a similar name, so the events that took place at that prison wouldn't be forgotten."

"What events?"

Iolaus looked up to the sky and gave an exaggeratedly long-suffering glance before he replied. "Remember all the trouble King Iphicles had with some of the disgruntled veterans of the Trojan War, and how he finally decided to set aside land on his northern borders for them to make a new start?"

"Oh yeah, that nasty incident at the prison. But that was quite a few years ago."

"Uh-huh. Well, some of those vets didn't want to farm, but they did like the idea of a new life on the outskirts of civilization, so they set off for the southern peninsula instead, looking for a good spot to settle down near the sea. Just an out-of-the-way place where they could fish and maybe do a little trading along the coast, since some of them had had experience on ships during the war. Along that coast, there's always problems with pirates raiding the towns, but with this group of organized warriors there, Gargatha quickly gained a reputation as a good place to be left alone."

"You're telling me we're heading to a town full of belligerent ex-soldiers and marauding pirates?!" I exclaimed.

"Not exactly." He put a hand on my arm, trying to calm me down. "The pirates haven't been a problem for years. And once the vets got the town going, other people also decided to settle there, precisely because it was so safe."

"If I'd known all this, I'm not sure I'd have brought Dari along," I replied, uncomforted by his assurances.

"But this is an excellent chance for us to try to change her mind. Like I said, I know a lot of these ex-soldiers."

"Great! I should introduce her to exactly the folks that I don't want her to imitate. We've been over this already. I don't see the point."

Another long-suffering look from my companion. "This would show her what war does to people who seek it out, even when they win."

I was still thinking about that when he went on to ask the question I had managed to keep out of my mind until then. "Euphonius, are you really just upset over my encouraging Dari, or is there something else behind it?"

"Something else?" I asked, stalling for time to think. "What did you have in mind?"

"Oh, jealousy, for one thing."

"I am not jealous of a little girl," I replied stiffly.

He grinned and punched me lightly on the arm. "Yeah, you are. Come on, admit it. You'd rather that I be paying attention to you, not her."

"That's not true. I don't --"

"Sure you do," he interrupted.

And the worst part of it was that he was right. Yeah, there had been that night with him and Hercules, but that might have been just a fluke. I was scared to death that I'd never have him in my arms again.

"Okay, okay. I want you," I admitted. "I've wanted you from the moment I first saw you. So what? I know you're with Hercules. I know you don't love me, and never will. Again, so what? This is old news."

He stopped my impassioned outburst by putting his hand over mine. "I know. And I will be your friend, regardless of whatever else happens, or doesn't happen, between us." 

As always, he smiled and my heart melted. And my cock stiffened. The world turned into that timeless moment when you each stare into the others' eyes longingly, then lean forward for a passionate kiss –- 

Iolaus drew back, shaking his head. "No, not now. I just don't feel like it."

I wasn't willing to give up quite that easily. "What's wrong? Is it because of Hercules? You know I'll never try to take you away from him. Sure, I care a lot for you, but I'm not the happily-ever-after, forever-and-ever type. You should know that by now."

Despite my sincere protestations, he looked doubtful. "It isn't always easy to hold someone so loosely. I know. I've tried it at various times. If you really want something badly, you tend to hold onto it as tightly as you can."

"I'm not like that."

"You may think you're not, and you may say you're not, but when it comes right down to it --" He made a palms-up gesture, then fixed me with a somewhat sheepish smile. "Well, things aren't always the way we think they're going to be, that's all. I don't want to end up hurting you."

He was right, and I knew it. And yet I truly was willing to hold him just that loosely, as long as I knew I could hold him at all. I'd seen him and Hercules together, and I knew I couldn't break into that partnership. The Gods knew, I'd even helped get them back together not all that long ago, when guilt and misunderstanding had threatened to end their relationship. 

"If it came to a choice," I reassured him, "I'd rather have your friendship and respect than your gorgeous body." I said that last bit with a smile and a joking tone, so he wouldn't feel I was getting too heavy. "But I'd far rather have both, if possible. I can handle it. What you and Hercules have is special. I'd never want to come between you two, don't worry. You and I, we could never have that sort of relationship. I know that. Our lifestyles are too different. I'd never expect you to --"

He silenced me by holding up one hand. "It isn't just that. I just can't. Can you understand that?"

"Yeah," I admitted helplessly. Gesturing towards the river, I added, "Besides, Dari will be back any minute. This is bad timing right now anyway. But maybe some other time?"

"Maybe. I don't know." He sounded genuinely confused. "I don't want to promise --"

This time I was the one to stop him with a wave of the hand. "No promises. I'm not looking for promises. Only possibilities."

In silence, he nodded. And I had to be content with that.

 

Later that night, I tossed sleeplessly beneath my blanket. The ground seemed to get harder and more uncomfortable no matter which way I turned, so eventually I sat up and huddled a little closer to the glowing embers of our fire, moving as noiselessly as possible so as not to wake my companions. Iolaus lay facing away from me, distinguishable only by his light hair in the faint moonlight that filtered through the trees.

Did I love him? Yes. There was no question of that. Did I want him in my bed? Yes, just as often as he wished to be there. But did I want him as a permanent fixture in my life? No, not really. As I had tried to tell him, that isn't my style of love, and never has been. That's why I live essentially alone, and like it that way.

But that didn't prevent me from burning with desire every time I laid eyes on him. Nor did it stop the wistfully lusty thoughts that haunted me whenever he wasn't around. Nor, for that matter, did it stop the hard-on I had now, just from looking at him asleep over there.

But I'm not a young stud anymore, and these days my head is more likely to overrule my cock, rather than the other way around.

So why had he turned me down? He and Herc had never promised, nor practiced, exclusive monogamy. As I understood it, they were both free to have sex with others, male or female. Maybe he really just wasn't in the mood? Maybe our little disagreement about his friends in Gargatha had upset him? No, that would be just too trivial. He had to be worried that I'd become too possessive.

So how do you convince someone that you love him so much, you'll even let him go?

I curled up again and tried to fall asleep, mulling over that question in my mind.

 

The following day, I rode in front, but allowed my horse to slow down every so often in order to bring me closer to Dari and Iolaus, not trying to be too obvious, but wanting to know just exactly what he was telling her.

"I remember that other Iolaus," came her voice from behind me, "the one from the nasty universe. When I first met him, he wasn't much of a fighter, but he had courage. The bards say he became a hero, even before he became a merman, because Hercules helped him. If a little wimp like that can do it, I can too."

As far as I could tell, Iolaus didn't turn a hair at the reference to his alter ego as a little wimp. He just said, "You may think this is strange, but Aphrodite taught that other Iolaus more about fighting than Hercules did."

"Really?" When she answered him, she sounded very suspicious. "How do you know?"

"Herc told me."

"Aphrodite? That silly Goddess?"

Iolaus laughed. "You'd better not let her hear you call her silly, my young friend. She can be pretty serious, in her own inimitable way."

"I don't care. I don't like her."

"Why not?"

"Because my mother always wants me to go to her temple and make an offering. She thinks I need help from Aphrodite. You know, in the romance department?"

"Plenty of time for that when you grow up."

"Nah, not me. I'm not interested."

"You will be, one of these days. Trust me."

Satisfied that they were at least not talking about martial matters, I kicked my horse into a slightly faster walk as Dari staunchly defended her stand against love to an amused Iolaus.

 

That night, it was Dari who sought me out, while Iolaus was off hunting us dinner again. She came over to where I was working on the fire, looking strangely hesitant and nervous.

"Uncle Euphonius, can I ask you something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Were Xena and Gabrielle lovers?"

"I'm not really certain. Some bards say they were and some say they were just friends." I hit on an idea that would get me out of this possibly awkward situation. "Why don't you ask Iolaus? He knew them pretty well."

"I wasn't sure that was something I could ask him. I mean, I know about him and Xena and all." She looked up at me, meeting my eyes directly. "I also know about him and Hercules. And you."

"How --?"

"He told me. Oh, Uncle Euphonius, don't look so surprised. I've known about your preference for men for years. You know that. This isn't any different."

Gah! Now a child is more blasé about my sex life than I am!

"All right," I said slowly and calmly. Suddenly the little girl sitting next to me looked less like a child and more like a young woman. "If you want my opinion, and that's all it is, an opinion, then yes, Gabrielle and Xena were lovers."

She nodded in what appeared to be satisfaction, before saying very solemnly, "That's what I think also." Then her eyes turned tender and she touched my hand. "Thanks for being honest with me, Uncle Euphonius, and also for not treating me like a baby."

The fall of her light tunic in the firelight revealed the slight curves of a young girl's breasts. Funny how I had never noticed that before.

"You're certainly not a baby, my dear," I told her. "But you're not a grown woman yet either. Don't forget that."

"I won't," she promised. Then she kissed my cheek quickly and stood back, placing one hand on the hilt of the dagger at her waist. "But I'll get there soon, you know." With a short laugh, she ran off.

I shook my head, wondering what on earth had brought on that conversation. At any rate, it was an improvement over her usual subject. At least she was thinking of something else.

 

We arrived in Gargatha at mid-day. While I asked directions to Lucama's shop, Iolaus took the horses to the stables and went off to try to find his friends. Dari had wanted to go with him, but I made her stay with me instead, figuring she'd do better to learn a bit about buying merchandise than by hanging around Iolaus. She made a face, but obeyed without objection. Good. She was learning.

Besides, she had doubtless overheard me tell Iolaus to invite his buddies to a feast that night at the Victory, the best tavern in town, so she knew she'd get to meet them later.

 

I held the rubies up to the light and examined each one carefully. Two were fairly small, meant for earrings, while the other twelve were of a larger size, destined for Aphrodite's necklace. Although they all appeared to be of good quality, I shook my head and said to Lucama, "Well, I just don't know. They aren't quite the shade of pink that I had in mind." 

"Hey, what do you expect?" he objected, picking up one of the larger ones and waving it in my face. "Most rubies are deep red. I had to scour the earth for some that looked even a little bit pink. You should be glad I have any at all."

"All right, all right," I replied grudgingly. "How much do you want for these inferior gems?"

"Inferior?! You dare insult my merchandise?" He held the ruby up to the window. "Just look at the quality of the cut, the brilliance of the stone!" Clapping a hand on Dari's shoulder, he pulled her over to the proper angle to see the light coming through. "Here, girl, look at this. You just tell me if this isn't a lovely shade of pink."

She squinted her eyes and made a show of studying the stone from several angles. "Well, I guess it's pink enough. But it's supposed to be a gift to Aphrodite." She looked up at Lucama, all innocence. "Wouldn't she like more of a rose color?"

"The Goddess of Love?" the merchant replied, his thick eyebrows lifting upwards in surprise. "These are for her?"

Dari nodded, copying his wide-eyed expression, as if she herself was awed at the concept.

I had to stifle a grin at how well she was handling things.

"Well now," Lucama said, stroking his beard thoughtfully. "Since these rubies are meant for a Goddess, I might just have to give you a better deal."

When he quoted me a price, it was far more reasonable than I had expected. However, I couldn't let him know that.

"By Zeus' magnificent –-,"I started to swear, then stopped short, noticing Dari's presence and quickly changing the body part I had intended to mention, "Uh -- beard! Do you call that a proper price for these stones? You're insulting my intelligence, if you think I'll pay such an exorbitant amount." 

Of course, we went on from there, until we finally ended up with a price we could both agree on. It was mostly bluff and blunder, as is usually the way in business transactions. Nevertheless, I was entirely satisfied, especially since Dari's remarks had helped quite a bit. At last she had shown an aptitude for doing something useful. I even bought a nice ruby ring for myself, with the money I had saved on the other rubies.

As I counted out the dinars for Lucama, Dari asked softly, "Uncle Euphonius, may I go find Iolaus now?"

"All right. But don't forget about dinner at the tavern later on. And don't get in any trouble."

"Thanks, Uncle Euphonius! I'll behave," she said over her shoulder as she darted out the door.

Not too much later, the deal had been concluded and I had safely stowed the gems away with my things. I had strolled around the town, checking the place out, glancing into some of the shops and even making a few good buys here and there. Every so often, I happened to glance at my new ring, admiring it cheerfully. Like any good merchant, I love a bargain. And I do so much love shiny things.

It was just beginning to get dark as I headed for the Victory Tavern and the meal I was hosting for Iolaus and his friends. By now, I was having some serious misgivings about the wisdom of introducing Dari to what sounded like some pretty disreputable characters, but it was far too late to cancel the banquet. 

When I saw Dari coming up the street towards the tavern with Iolaus next to her, I was somewhat relieved, until a tall stranger holding a sword jumped out of an alley in front of them with a decidedly unfriendly shout.

Iolaus swung around, his sword rising to meet his opponent's. At the same time, he pushed Dari behind him, out of harm's way. The two men traded a few fierce blows, while I hurried forward, intent on getting Dari away from the fracas.

Iolaus tripped as he took a step backward, landing hard in the dirt. The stranger was on him immediately, the tip of his blade at my friend's throat.

I stopped abruptly, drawing out the throwing knife I keep in my boot. My arm was already back and in another heartbeat I'd have tossed the blade. Fortunately, I was now close enough to see them both clearly and to hear what they were saying.

The attacker had this funny sort of a smile on his face. His lips spread in a grimace so wide as to be almost a caricature of mirth, displaying clenched teeth. But the smile never reached his eyes, which stared with a kind of maniac glee, giving a definite impression of insanity.

Iolaus casually pushed aside the point of the sword. "Siann, don't smile like that, huh?"

"This smile is the last thing some people have seen," the madman replied calmly.

A shiver ran down my spine at the words, but the stranger broke the spell immediately by lowering the sword, pulling Iolaus to his feet, and hugging him tightly. As I watched the laughing and mutual back-pounding, I realized they had to be old friends, and the fierce swordplay had been play only.

Somewhat embarrassed at what I'd almost done, I slid my knife back into its accustomed hiding place and walked over to put a protective arm around Dari.

"You might have hurt the child with all that fooling around," I chided the two of them, eyeing the stranger coldly. He was taller than I am, which isn't saying a whole lot, and appeared to be about Iolaus' age. Short dark hair fell forward over a surprisingly delicate face. A somewhat stocky body, but not fat by any means. Not bad-looking, I decided, but nothing to cheer about.

The stranger favored me with a slight smile. He was clearly scrutinizing me also, as his eyes traveled up and down my torso, then landed on my face. "Don't be such a spoilsport," he said, in a voice far too high for his years. "We wouldn't have harmed the girl." Then he turned to Iolaus, draping one arm around his shoulders and clearly dismissing me from his thoughts. "C'mon, buddy. Let's go inside and have a drink. You did say you were holding a feast, didn't you?"

"Not me," Iolaus hastened to point out. "My friend Euphonius is paying."

"Just as long as it's free, I don't care. C'mon."

Iolaus didn't budge. "Siann, I think I'd better introduce you to our host." He glanced significantly at me. "Euphonius, I'd like you to meet Siann. She and I fought together in the war." 

I did a mental double take. She? By the Gods, this is a woman! I kept a totally neutral expression on my face, not wanting her to realize I had ever thought otherwise. If this was one of Iolaus' so-called friends, I was not impressed. Quite the opposite, in fact.

"Glad to meet you, Euphronius," Siann said, seeming not the least bit embarrassed by her faux pas.

"Euphonius, not Euphronius," I corrected automatically. I hate it when people mess up my name, since it means pleasing to the ear.

"Oh, sorry." She tried again, with almost sarcastic precision, "Eu-phon-I-us. What kind of a dumb name is that, anyway?" 

Have you ever met someone and taken an immediate dislike to them, whether or not later events proved you to be correct? If you have, then you'll know how I reacted to Siann. 

"My name literally means pleasing to the ears. My parents thought it sounded nice," I replied frostily. I wasn't sure if she even got the pun, but that's my standard answer to a question about my name.

"Let's go inside," Iolaus suggested, seeing us staring at each other in a less than friendly manner.

 

Once inside the Victory Tavern, I made sure that Dari was safely seated between Iolaus and me, still having serious doubts about the wisdom of hosting this little dinner party. If all of Iolaus' buddies were as uncouth as Siann, perhaps I shouldn't even have brought the child into this situation. But it was too late now. She clearly loved every minute of it, staring around wide-eyed at all of her "heroes".

Heroes indeed! I reflected, glancing around the crowded tavern. This ragtag bunch of scruffy, aging ex-soldiers didn't impress me in the least. However, I had no choice but to smile and act the part of the gracious host as Iolaus introduced a succession of his friends. There was much exuberant greeting and backslapping going on. One huge man caught Iolaus up in a fierce bear hug, actually lifting him clear off the floor. This was an even more remarkable feat when you considered that the man had only one arm. His other sleeve was folded up and pinned at the shoulder. Not only that, but he walked with a distinct limp.

Somewhat sheepishly, Iolaus introduced the one-armed giant as Vachon.

Once Dari had eaten her fill, she ran off and left me to sit and drink with the others. I saw her moving about the room, fetching food and ale for the various war heroes and listening raptly to their words. This wasn't working well at all. No, indeed. I should never have brought her here.

Siann had seated herself across the table from me. Woman she might be, but I noticed sourly that she had a man's appetite. She polished off the ale like a man also. Five empty tankards stood neatly in a line before her, and she was working diligently on draining the sixth.

"Hey, Euphorbia," she finally said, seeing me watching her. "How'd you get to be friends with Iolaus anyway?"

"Euphonius," I corrected sourly. The faintly mocking smile on her face told me clearly enough that she had deliberately screwed up my name, but I chose to pretend otherwise. "Euphorbia is a tropical plant."

"Oh, is it really?" she remarked innocently.

"Yes. And in answer to your question, I met Iolaus a number of years ago, when he came to my village to visit his mother."

Getting up from her place, she came around the table and sat down next to me. One arm draped around my shoulders, she played with a bit of my hair as she said, "So, Eponymous, you're kinda cute, I think. Whaddya say we get to know each other a little better?"

Surprised, I wasn't entirely sure if she was actually making a pass at me, or simply making fun of me.

"Siann --" Iolaus began warningly.

I waved him to silence, replying disdainfully, "Eponymous means an adjective relating to the person for whom something is named." I slipped out from under her arm. "And I think I know you well enough already."

"Oh, that's right. Your kind doesn't fancy women, do they?" She shrugged elaborately, then ran her fingers down the front of my tunic in what could have been a seductive gesture. "Too bad. Judging by the fancy clothes and that shiny red ring, you're pretty rich."

"Not by a long shot," I retorted, brushing away her hand. "Well-off, maybe. But I work hard for my dinars."

"Oh, I'll just bet you do, Sweetie." 

Everyone within hearing distance laughed at the interchange, but I was getting madder by the minute. I found "Sweetie" even more obnoxious than the ways she had purposely mispronounced my name.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you it's not polite to insult the person who's paying for your food and drink?" I replied icily.

"Insult you? I try to pick you up and you get all huffy about it? Ha, Euphorius, old boy, get a life!"

Damn her, she'd done it again! "Euphonius," I corrected patiently, as if to the village idiot. I was not going to let her know that she had gotten my goat.  
She just laughed and reached out toward me again. 

Iolaus caught her hand. "Siann, enough already. Leave him alone."

Their eyes met, and I saw the flash of something beyond just friendship. Unwanted jealousy flared in my heart. Siann and Iolaus? No, surely not!

But she backed off, whether in response to his words or just because she had had enough of teasing me, I didn't know. "Okay, buddy, okay," she told him lightly. "Eucalyptus here is just such fun to tease, that's all." 

As I bit my tongue so as not to respond to yet another deliberate insult to my name, Siann returned to her original place across the table, blew me an elaborate kiss, then flagged down the serving wench for another tankard of ale.

At least I was rid of her harassment for the present. My anger began to subside. As I took a few slow swallows of my own ale, I caught a bit of conversation from a couple of men sitting not far away, easily recognizing the speaker as the big man who had lifted Iolaus off his feet earlier on.

"Trojan War. Humph!" he was saying. "A waste of life. All those men dead, and for what? Because one king's wife ran off with another king. Never should have fought a war over that."

After all these years, they were still re-hashing the politics of the war? I stifled a yawn. How dreadfully boring! Iolaus didn't seem to be saying much. I had expected that he'd be more garrulous in the company of his old friends. Now that I thought about it, he had been rather guarded and withdrawn during the entire meal. Definitely not like him.

"Vachon, we were just soldiers," another man objected loudly, drawing my attention back to the discussion. "That wasn't up to us to decide."

"Then who is it up to, Myka? We fought, we died, and what happened? We came home, and no one wanted us around. They all just wanted to forget it ever happened." He held up his empty sleeve. "Well, how about me? Am I supposed to just forget this? By the Gods, I wish I could!" With his good arm, he pounded a fist down on the table. "Remember what Ajax said about the ones who didn't have the guts to fight beside us, but now had the nerve to spit on us? Well, he was right! Even here, the damn civilians in this town would be happy if we'd all just die of old age."

"That's not true," the other man objected. Myka had medium-dark skin, and long hair knotted behind his neck. He was tall, and impressive. I had the feeling that he had been extremely handsome in his youth, since he was still very attractive now. He looked maybe 35 years old, so he must have been quite young when he had fought at Troy. "The townspeople know that it's only fear of us that keeps Tellis' pirate gang away."

Pirates? Had I heard him mention pirates? And in the present tense? Alarmed, I kept a sharper ear on the conversation.

"Yeah, well," Vachon replied. "But I still remember how the Corinthians told us we'd been fighting for so long that we were nothing but a bunch of thugs, and that we couldn't leave the fighting behind."

Siann stopped her steady drinking to join in the dispute. "Well, isn't that true, to some extent? We're not civilians, and we don't think like civilians." She grinned. "After all, who'd want to think like them? Bunch of cowards and wimps!"

I thought I caught her looking at me out of the corners of her eyes as she said that. But I kept silent, telling myself I had too much dignity to respond to the insult of a drunken ruffian.

When Vachon griped again about the attitude of some of the folks of Gargatha, the talk turned toward the past, and the way the townspeople had once given them respect and honor for keeping pirates and bandits away. Eventually, they likened the present situation to what had happened in Corinth some years ago, when King Iphicles had given them trouble, throwing some of them into the prison of Golgoth. I knew the basics of the story, of course, so I found it pretty dull. I was listening for more mention of pirates. Hearing nothing, I finally grew impatient. I leaned over towards Iolaus and asked him in a low voice, "You know anything about Tellis the pirate?"

Unfortunately, I hadn't spoken softly enough, since Siann took it upon herself to answer my question.

"You're interested in Tellis, eh? Yeah, he's a pirate all right, and a nasty one. You'd better hope he doesn't decide to attack us while you're here, Euph. I don't think you'd like that at all."

I winced at being called by a shortened form of my name, but didn't bother to object. I was far too concerned about what she'd said. I turned once more to Iolaus. "You didn't tell me about this when you recommended we come here."

"How could I? I didn't know about it. I thought it was all in the past." He shifted his glance away from me, as if he really wasn't too happy about the situation. I'd have bet that his friends had told him already, but he had kept quiet, not wanting to worry me over something that was, after all, only an unlikely possibility.

"Don't worry," Myka said, scowling at Siann. "Nothing's going to happen. Tellis has enough sense to keep away from Gargatha. There are more than enough other towns for him to raid."

"Not too many as prosperous as we are, though," Siann put in, with a leering wink at me. "But don't worry, pal. Me and my buddies will protect you."

"Thank you," I told her coldly, before I addressed the others heartily, and possibly slightly sarcastically. "With such an illustrious gathering of heroes and warriors, I'm sure I have nothing to fear."

A laughing chorus of assurances greeted my remark. Vachon raised his ale and proposed a toast to their host, which I graciously accepted. 

Although the grin on Siann's face was less than respectful, she joined in with the cheers, then drained her tankard and waved for another one. And yet, she truly didn't act drunk. The annoying woman seemed able to down an incredible amount of alcohol without showing any obvious effects. Had I drunk that much ale, I'd have been passed out under the table.

Iolaus surprised me by reaching across to touch Siann's hand and saying, "Don't you think you've had enough?"

"I can never have enough," was the cold sober and very bitter reply.

"Why do you do it?" He waved at the empty tankards lined up neatly in front of her.

She shrugged and added one more to the lineup. "It's the only thing that keeps the nightmares away."

"I fought in the same war you did, and I don't have nightmares." He hesitated. "Well, not very often, anyway."

She fixed her eyes on his. "No two people ever fight the same war, Iolaus. You should know that. What I did, what you did, what Myka did, isn't the same at all."

"But --"

"There are no buts. You're free to come to terms with it however you can, pal, but let me do the same." She took more ale from the serving wench's tray and lifted it high. "This is what works for me."

Iolaus persisted. "Ajax once said that a good soldier never surrenders, but he always recognizes the enemy when he sees him, and sometimes, that enemy is within." He eyed the ale significantly. 

Siann didn't like that insinuation at all. "Give it a rest, buddy. I'm warning you." Then her tone changed, as she looked closer at the sincere concern in Iolaus' eyes, where she might have expected to see blame. She smiled a bit, to erase her threat. "No, sorry. But I am asking you. Leave it alone."

He gave up the argument. Siann drained the entire tankard, then got to her feet and walked out the back door of the tavern, almost certainly to visit the outhouse after all that ale.

As I frowned at her departing back, Iolaus asked me softly, "You don't like her, do you?"

I laughed. "Now, whatever gave you that idea?" 

"Siann's not bad, when you get to know her," he hazarded.

"That's what you say. To me, she's a rude, obnoxious bitch, and I want nothing more to do with her."

"If you knew what happened to her in the war, you might be more understanding."

I was having none of it. "Hmph! She's not the only one who can cry about her war wounds. Look at Vachon over there. He's not nasty, and he looks to have been hurt far more badly than Siann was."

"Euphonius, you really don't know what you're talking about."

"Why not?"

He dropped his voice even lower. "It isn't what was done to her that bothers Siann. What haunts her is what she did to others."

Well, that did throw a bit of a different light on her behavior, but it still wasn't a very bright light. "What did she do?" I asked, more out of curiosity than true caring.

Iolaus looked distinctly uncomfortable. "She never talks about it. Only a few of us know, and I don't think I have the right to say anything more than I have already."

"All right, granted that Siann did some horrible stuff. It was a war, and that happens. Other people learn to forget about it and move on. Why can't she?"

"Maybe -- because she cares too much," he replied unhappily.

That didn't make a lot of sense to me, so I changed the subject. When Siann returned, she spent the rest of the evening avoiding me, much to my relief.

By the time the feasting and drinking were over, Dari was curled up alongside me on the bench, asleep with her head in Iolaus' lap. He had to carry her up to our rooms. 

 

When I awoke next morning, Dari wasn't lying beside me on the bed the way she was supposed to be. However, it being fairly late, I assumed she had gotten up earlier and gone off somewhere.

Despite a fine breakfast at the inn, I was not in the best of moods and a bad headache from last night's drinking was doing absolutely nothing to help the situation. I ventured outside, wincing as the bright sunlight assaulted my poor eyes. I figured Dari had gone to the big field on the far edge of town that I had noticed as we rode in being used as a practice ground by our illustrious band of warriors. I dragged my unwilling feet in that direction, trudging past the shops and homes and up the rise.

Yep, there they were, people exercising in groups or alone, or whacking at each other with staves or swords. I thought I saw Dari's small figure in the crowd that was watching Siann beat the shit out of her hapless opponent with a heavy staff. The noise of the wood cracking together reverberated through the relentless pounding in my head. I took a deep breath, willing the pain to ease off before I had to go stop the girl from making a nuisance of herself.

Iolaus sat leaning against a tree, munching on some brown bread and sipping now and then from a bottle he held in his left hand. I walked over and plopped down alongside him. From his half-hearted smile, I guessed that his head wasn't doing too much better this morning than mine was. He broke off a chunk of bread and held it out to me.

"No, thanks. I ate already." 

He offered the bottle instead. "Here, try a bit of this then. You look pretty green around the gills."

"What is it? About the last thing I need is more alcohol."

"It's a herbal potion Siann mixed up for me. Cures hangovers, but it does take a little time to act, so be patient."

Without too much hope of a miracle cure, I took a swig from the bottle, then made a face. "Tastes awful."

"That's not the point. It works. Trust me."

"Iolaus, my dear man, considering all we've been through together, how could I possibly not trust you?" Perhaps the potion truly was working, since my thoughts had shifted from my own misery to the pleasure of being here with him.

"That's the spirit. Lean back and enjoy the fresh morning air."

"Umm." The fresh air wasn't what I was enjoying. Sitting here with him, now that I could enjoy. In fact, I had to be careful not to let myself enjoy it too much or risk embarrassing myself. Then the clash of wood on wood brought me back to the present situation with Dari.

"Well, your idea didn't work very well, did it?" I began.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that Dari hasn't decided not to be a warrior, despite seeing all these people. Just look at her." I waved my hand in their direction. "She's over there staring at Siann."

Iolaus glanced in the direction I had indicated. "There's something wrong with that?" he remarked at last.

"You know full well that there is!" I said, more sharply than I had intended. "This isn't the lesson she was supposed to learn!"

"Ever consider that we may have been trying to teach her the wrong lesson?" he said diffidently.

I sat up straighter, all thought of relaxation gone. "What are you talking about?"

"You're not gonna like this, but there's always the chance that she does have what it takes to be a warrior."

"Rubbish! She's a child."

"And how old do you think I was when I started training?"

I fell back on my last line of defense. "She's a girl."

"Say that one more time, my friend, and I'll hit you upside the head," he said with a grin. "Besides, Xena was a girl."

"Now you're starting to sound like Dari!" I exclaimed in exasperation.

"Euphonius --"

"No, no, no! Absolutely not! I won't let my little girl grow up like that."

"She's not your little girl," he replied gently. "She's Ysabel's daughter. In fact, in a few more years, she won't even be a child anymore. She'll be a woman, and she'll be making her own decisions."

"She's the closest thing to a daughter that I'll ever have." No sooner were the words out of my mouth than I realized they were true. I had always been distantly fond of the child, but these last few days in her company had brought us closer together, despite our clash of opinions. "I don't want her to get hurt, that's all," I concluded lamely.

"I know. But you can't choose her life for her. She's the only one who's entitled to do that."

I sighed wearily and closed my eyes, knowing I was getting the worst of this discussion. "So what do you suggest?"

"Ever hear of Cheiron's Academy?"

"Cheiron the Centaur?"

"Yeah, but he's dead. Jason runs it now."

"So I've heard. But that's not a proper school. It's a training ground for mercenaries."

"Well, not exactly. Herc and I went there when we were young, you know."

"No," I replied absolutely, already sure I knew where the conversation was leading. "That's not for Dari."

"But --"

"I said no!" 

Furious, I got to my feet and stomped off, but I didn't get far before I had to glance back over my shoulder to see what effect, if any, my leaving had had on Iolaus. All he did was take another swig of his herbal hangover remedy.

Shit! I wanted him so badly, but sometimes I just hated his guts. And maybe the second feeling was nothing more than a reaction to the first. Euphonius, you monumental asshole! 

Well, at least we'd be leaving Gargatha tomorrow. If things were no better with Dari than they'd been before, they were also no worse. And besides, my headache actually was beginning to subside, just as Iolaus had promised it would.

I strode around the practice field for a while, letting my anger fade away along with the pain in my head. When I had calmed down a bit, I went to gather up Dari, intending to take her with me as I went in search of good buys in the marketplace. She had done so well with Lucama that I was anxious to teach her more of the fine points of bargaining, and maybe a bit about judging the quality of gemstones.

I wasn't pleased to find her engaged in a serious conversation with Siann. As I drew closer, I could hear what they were saying and my displeasure increased dramatically.

"Please, Siann! Teach me how to fight," Dari pleaded.

"You're just a baby, child. Go home. Find yourself a different life."

"No, I want to be a warrior. Like you."

Siann shook her head. "You're too young to know what you want."

"I'm not. I can do it. I know I can."

By that time, I had gotten up next to them. "Take the lady's advice, Dari. She knows what she's talking about."

I had come up behind Siann's back, so she turned when she heard my voice and gave me a look. I took Dari's hand. "Come on with me and we'll go to the marketplace."

"No, I want to stay here." She pulled away from me.

I'm not too proud to stoop to a little bribery now and then. "Come with me and I'll buy you something nice."

"Will you buy me a staff?" Dari asked hopefully.

"Certainly not! I had in mind something nicer, like a ring or a necklace."

"Then I want to stay here."

Siann laughed. "Looks like you can't buy her off so easily, little merchant." Putting one hand on Dari's shoulder, she went on, "All right, girl, if you're so determined, I'll show you a few moves."

I got the distinct impression that the obnoxious woman had only offered to do it in order to spite me. 

"Very well," I replied shortly. Then I turned and stalked off by myself to the marketplace, muttering angry curses under my breath. This whole thing just wasn't working out as planned.

 

"Please, Uncle Euphonius! Just a few more days. Please?" Dari wheedled, as we sat eating a late dinner at the inn that evening.

"No. It's time we headed home. We've been here long enough."

"But I'm learning so much. I don't want to go yet. Just two more days?"

I glanced at Iolaus, hoping for some backup. He shrugged. "I wouldn't mind staying a little longer. There's plenty of time before I'm supposed to meet Herc."

"What about those pirates everyone was talking about?" I objected. "We don't want to be here if they decide to attack the town."

He just shrugged. "Tellis has more sense than that. The town's waterfront is pretty well fortified against attack. We're perfectly safe."

I threw up my hands in surrender, but the truth was I really didn't mind staying, even if it meant that Dari got to play warrior for a little longer. It also meant I could spend just that much more time in Iolaus' company. 

 

Next day, as I once again walked through the village that had been named for a prison, I wandered curiously away from the main thoroughfare and through the back streets. I saw a man without both legs, dragging himself around on a little wheeled platform. A woman passed me in the street, half her face twisted and destroyed by a burn scar. From a dismal little hut with a barred door, I heard someone screaming in the unmistakably accents of insanity. Outside the town, I stumbled upon an old graveyard and read the memorial stones, set up to honor comrades long dead. There were a lot of them, and the dates were from the time period of the Trojan War.

Looking at the names on the stones, and the occasional statue or face carved into the marker, I got a very clear feeling that I was walking through a country I could never understand in anything except an intellectual way. I had not been a part of the War. I had in fact never been a soldier of any kind. Oh yes, I had had a few adventures in my life and the face of death wasn't entirely unfamiliar to me. But I had never seen killing on a large scale, and never had to contemplate the blood on my own hands, only to wonder if it had been justified or not. Despite my expertise with a throwing knife and a certain amount of skill with a rapier, I had never been trained to use the weapons of a professional soldier.

I had never seen the face of my enemy up close, and realized, just before I killed him, that he was only a man like me. 

I had never laid my sword on Ares' altar and prayed for success in battle. 

I had never had to.

All these things, and more, had simply never been a part of my life. Perhaps I had been lucky in this regard. But it also made me a perpetual outsider in that world I now saw around me, reflected in the eyes of the men and women who had once stood before the walls of Troy and experienced, for ten long and endless years, the death and destruction of an ultimately useless war.

The only thing I could do was attempt to imagine it, while for them it lived on in their memories, and in their nightmares. I knew that now, from the conversations I had heard since I'd been in town. 

Peace can be very slow in coming, even after the battles are long over.

So all right, maybe these men and women deserved more sympathy and understanding than I had been willing to give them. Maybe they even deserved a bit of respect for what they had been through. But it was still nothing for a young girl to aspire to be, was it?

 

I was still thinking these melancholy and sobering thoughts when I passed the practice field and saw Dari out there sparring with Siann, with several other people gathered around to watch. I sighed and shook my head, and would have continued on towards the inn except that I saw Iolaus with the watchers. Just as I joined the group, Dari took a wild swing and missed her target completely, only to have her opponent whack her smartly across the back with her staff. Dari stumbled forward and fell face down on the ground from the force of the blow she had taken.

That was too much for me. Stepping in front of the fallen girl, I faced Siann and ordered angrily, "Stop it! You'll hurt the child."

Siann looked daggers at me. For a moment, I thought she was going to hit me with her staff also, but then she set one end down on the ground and leaned on it. "Don't worry, I won't do your precious little niece any real harm," she said with a slight sneer. "But I might hurt her a little, now and then."

"Well, that makes me feel just a whole lot better," I retorted sarcastically, holding my ground.

"You don't understand," Iolaus broke in, coming over to me. "Getting hurt is part of what happens. If Dari can't deal with that, she'll back out right now. If she can, then she'll learn what to expect."

"But --"

"I know, I know: she's just a little girl, right?"

"Right!"

Grabbing my arm, he turned me around to face Dari. "Look closer, buddy. Do you see a little girl?"

I looked. With blood oozing from her nose, she had stood up, retrieved her staff, and was once more in an on-guard stance, determined to continue the uneven fight.

"No, I do not see a little girl," I admitted unhappily to Iolaus as I wilted. "I see a warrior in training, and that doesn't please me at all."

While Dari smiled grimly, Siann raised her staff once more. With a glance at me, she asked scornfully, "What's the matter, Sweetie? Are you threatened by the idea of your little niece becoming more of a man than you are?"

I took a deep breath, stood as tall as I could, and tried to ignore her calling me "Sweetie" as I replied tightly, "You don't have to be a warrior to be a man."

"No?" She lifted one eyebrow. "Is that how you truly feel, or do you just have to say that to save your pride?"

I fixed her with a level look. "I'm not trying to protect my pride. I don't have to. I know who and what I am, and I'm not ashamed of it. Can you say the same?"

I had expected to nail her with that last comment, but I hadn't expected to succeed quite so well. A wildfire ignited behind her eyes and her lips twisted into that sick smile as she tossed her staff away. I never even saw her fist until it connected with my gut. As I doubled over, struggling to breathe, she hit me again in the jaw, rocking my head back and sending me sprawling on the ground.

As I tried to pull my wits together, I heard her shouting at me. "You despicable coward! How dare you say that to me?! Let me go! I'll kill that little misbegotten son of a sea whore!"

(So all right, maybe her actual words were a lot more descriptive than that, but I'm giving you the gist of what she said as politely as I can.)

As I finally managed to suck in some air, I saw that Iolaus was holding her back, along with two or three of the others. Dari knelt next to me, pleading for some assurance that I was okay. I took her hand and gave it a squeeze, which was about all I could manage at the time.

I glared at the furious bitch as Dari helped me sit up. Siann continued raving about what a wretch I was, while I continued trying to breathe. As soon as I could, I said in between gasps, "Oh sure, beat the shit out of me. That really shows how big and brave you are, doesn't it?" I was playing to Dari now. "Show everyone just what a brute and ruffian you truly are. Rage and violence. That's typical of your type, isn't it?"

Siann stopped struggling and went abruptly white in the face. When they let her go, she turned her back.

That freed Iolaus to rush over to me. "You okay?"

"I -- think so."

His fingers probed my midsection, looking for broken ribs. Then he turned my face up to him and gently explored the growing bruise on the right side of my chin, running his fingers along my jaw. "I don't think anything is broken," he concluded.

"No thanks to Siann, if it's not."

His eyes slid sideways for a moment in Siann's direction. "If she had wanted to kill you, buddy, you'd be dead," he said softly. "Do you think you can stand up? I'd like to get you back to your room so I can put a cold compress on your jaw before it swells up."

"Sure. I can stand. Just give me a hand."

He did. No sooner had I gotten to my feet than the world started turning black around the edges and I got that ringing in my ears that meant I was going to faint. My knees sagged, but I found myself gathered up into strong arms and held like a baby. Somewhere in the distance, a voice said, "It's okay, I'll carry him."

As my head cleared a little, I realized with dismay that it was Siann who held me. I would have protested, but I felt too dizzy. 

I heard Iolaus say, "Dari, go and practice with Vachon for a while, okay?"

"But Vachon only has one arm," Dari replied uncertainly. "What can he do?"

"More than most of us can do with both arms. Go on now and do as I say." 

The girl looked to me for confirmation. I could do little more than nod. 

Reluctantly, she obeyed.

"Come on," Siann said. "Let's get him back to the tavern."

 

Jogged around as I was, the trip seemed to take forever, but I was at last in my room, mercifully at peace and lying on the bed. Siann had taken out a small leather pouch and was sorting through it, as Iolaus held a cold cloth against my jaw.

When Siann approached the bed, I frowned and drew back. "No. Go away. You've done enough damage."

"Euphonius, she's trying to help."

"Don't care. Make her go away."

"I won't hurt you," Siann replied, with uncharacteristic tenderness. "If you put these leaves under your tongue, you'll feel better."

I glared at her suspiciously.

"I know what I'm doing." She looked away. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I over-reacted."

Still wary, I nodded and opened my mouth, wincing at the pain that shot through the side of my face. The leaves tasted terrible, but after a little while I really did start to feel better.

Siann disappeared briefly, then came back in the door with a cup in one hand and a bulging wineskin in the other. She held out the cup in my direction. "Here. It's nice cold water, laced with a bit of wine. It'll restore your spirits."

"My spirits were just fine, until you attacked me." I grabbed the cup and sipped a little. I was starting to feel like my old self again, but I was still pretty angry.

"Look, I said I was sorry."

I took another sip. "Sorry? And you think that makes it all well? Life doesn't work that way, lady."

I'd have sworn she winced at that. In fact, as I looked over the edge of the cup at her face, I saw a dreadfully bleak expression come into her eyes.

"I know," she said softly, turning away.

Iolaus glanced at me and shook his head briefly. Then he surprised me by going over to the woman and putting his arms around her, drawing her into a comradely hug. She overtopped him by a head, which seemed rather amusing to me at the time. 

"It's all right, Siann," I heard him murmur. "It's just that he doesn't understand, that's all."

Surprised, I thought I saw the glitter of a tear in her eye as she allowed herself to lean against him and rest her cheek on his shining hair. I was beginning to feel guilty about harassing her, until I saw her bend down a little and kiss him full on the lips. 

When the kiss went on far longer than it decently should have, I decided I was not feeling quite as guilty as I had before. Once again, I wondered if they had ever screwed around together. 

I debated the merits of just ignoring them as opposed to interrupting them. Interrupting won, hands down.

I cleared my throat loudly. "All right, you two. Enough of that."

Despite my pleasure at making them break off the clinch, I saw a dangerous gleam in Siann's eye.

"You mean you don't like to watch?" she asked archly.

"Not particularly." This whole thing was making me distinctly uncomfortable.

Still looking at me, she slid a hand under Iolaus' vest and ran her fingers mockingly down his bare chest to his belt buckle. "I think you'd just love to watch us. In fact, I think you'd love to do just about anything that involves my pretty blond buddy here, wouldn't you?"

She had read my feelings all too well. "Him, yes," I retorted. "You, no."

"Sure you won't change your mind about that, Sweetie?" Her hand strayed lower, reaching for the leather of his codpiece.

Iolaus had finally had enough. He grabbed her hand and moved it firmly away. Or at least that's what I think he was trying to do. Siann let him move her hand all right, but she kept ahold of his hand and pressed it squarely onto one of her breasts. I saw his eyes widen and he drew in his breath.

"Siann –-" he started to protest. 

With a wicked smile at me, she stopped his protest by kissing him again.

When Iolaus finally broke loose and came up for air, I was burning with anger. Or was it jealousy? Or, then again, maybe it was just lust? There was virtually nothing Iolaus could do in the way of sex that wouldn't turn me on, Siann notwithstanding.

"Wanna put this bed to better use than nursing a barely-injured man?" she asked him mockingly.

Damn the woman! She was watching me over his shoulder and grinning!

Iolaus pushed her away and held her at arm's length. "Cut it out. This isn't funny."

"Maybe it's not supposed to be funny," she replied. "Maybe it's supposed to be an invitation." She flashed me an even more wicked grin. "How about it, Sweetie? Maybe you'd like to lie there and watch us? Or maybe you're up for a little action yourself?"

By now I was indeed up for something, despite my bruised ribs and aching jaw, but I had no clue as to how to interpret her words. A mocking challenge, or a genuine offer? I decided to play into it. "Watching or acting, either one is fine with me," I replied, matching her arch tone.

The woman laughed, but Iolaus just shook his head. "Siann, do you mean this for real? Or are you just playing games?"

"Darling boy, have I ever passed up a chance to make love to you?" she answered sweetly.

"Well, no, but --"

Once again, she turned to me. "I'll leave it up to our rich little friend then. What do you say, Sweetie? Are we serious?"

"Oh yeah." I was more than willing to admit to my desire for Iolaus, but I tried to keep it at that level. No way did I want this vicious bitch to realize just how much he really meant to me. If she did, I knew full well she'd find a way to turn my feelings into a mockery.

Iolaus, on the other hand, knew how much I cared for him. I just prayed he wouldn't let her know, if anything came of this outrageous flirting. It was almost with relief that I heard him say, "Siann, I'm really not in the mood for all this right now."

"No?" Boldly, she placed her hand on his codpiece again. A startled look came over her face and she removed her hand. "You aren't kidding, are you?"

"No. I'm not."

"What's wrong?"

"I don't know."

"Yes, you do. What is it?"

"These last few days, being here, remembering so many things . . ." He let his voice trail off. "I just haven't felt very –-" He grinned a little. "—amorous."

Siann glanced over at me, almost conspiratorially. Then she sat down on the side of the bed. "I rather think we could fix that if we tried, don't you?"

Not sure what she was up to, I replied, "Uh -– perhaps."

"No perhaps about it, Sweetie."

I didn't bother to react to the name this time. I had more important things to think about. Was she actually trying to maneuver us all into bed together, or was I imagining things?

"What if we bury our differences and work together on this? How about it? Want to kiss and make up?"

"I'd sooner kiss a raw fish," I growled.

She looked at me disgustedly. "Ha! You think I want to get it on with you? You probably don't even know where to put it, with a real woman."

I couldn't let her get away with that. "You'd be surprised what I know about women," I replied haughtily.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really!"

"I suppose you think you could get me off? Come on now." 

I gave her a narrow-eyed glare. "If I wanted to, I'll bet I could. But if you think I want to, you've got another think coming."

She drew herself up and sneered. "The man doesn't live that I can't handle, and make him like it, too."

The tension between us fairly sparkled, as we faced off against each other. Siann glared at me, and I glared right back at her and growled, "Oh, you think so, do you?"

Iolaus laughed. "You know, you two are actually rather funny," he said.

We both deflated visibly at this comment. Siann was at a loss for words, but I managed to say, "Funny?!"

"Yep." He sat down on the bed. "Okay, since you both seem to be determined to make this into a contest, how about we set up some rules, huh?"

As we continued to stare at him, he explained further. "Euphonius, you don't like Siann very much and you don't usually screw women. Right?"

I nodded my head.

"And Siann, you enjoy teasing Euphonius, and don't particularly like him either. Yes?"

She nodded. 

"But you both think you're pretty good in bed?"

He looked at us. We both nodded vigorously, not to be outdone by the other.

"Okay then," he concluded, "you each get a chance to make the other come. Whoever is successful gets the prize."

"What's the prize?" I asked, almost sure I knew the answer.

He grinned. "Me."

By now, I had pretty much forgotten my bruises. This could just possibly turn into something good. However, remembering Iolaus' earlier reluctance, I asked, "You sure you want to do this?"

"Yeah, I think so." He shrugged and his grin turned rather sheepish. "Maybe I'm not quite so –- disinterested as I thought I was."

"I'm game if you are, then."

"Who goes first?" Siann asked warily.

"Flip a dinar?" Iolaus suggested.

We did. I won the toss. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad.

"Okay now, play fair," Iolaus admonished, moving over to perch cross-legged at the head of the bed. "And may the best man and/or woman win."

I heaved an exaggerated sigh and moved closer to Siann. "All right. Let's get this over with."

All she gave me in reply was a disdainful snort, as she crossed her legs and folded her arms across her chest. I could tell this was going to be a challenge of the first order, but if this was what I had to do in order to have sex with Iolaus, then so be it.

Deliberately keeping my body from touching hers in any way, I knelt behind her on the bed and began to gently massage her neck and shoulders. Now and then, I allowed a finger to stray toward her ear, or up into her hair, or around to the side of her face, always gentle and teasing. The woman had muscles that would make a man proud, but by the time I was finished, those muscles had lost a good bit of their tension. My hands grew bolder, moving further down her back and around to the front of her body, but only to her taut abdomen and never underneath her clothes. Softly, my lips brushed her neck. I cautiously nibbled an earlobe, checking to see if I could do so without hurting my bruised jaw. Yep. No problem there. Guess I wasn't hurt all that badly after all. I went on to kiss her cheek and the edge of her eyelid. I never kissed her full on the mouth, but I covered just about everything I could reach from my position behind her on the bed.

It was all coming back to me now. All the little tricks and touches I had learned long ago in my youth, during the time I had spent with the Widow Twanky. All the many things she had taught me about making love to a woman, and the ways to read a woman's desire. There was nothing hard about any of this, nothing any man couldn't do, if he was willing to be patient and ignore the urgings of his cock. In my case, there were no urgings to ignore, which worked entirely to my benefit.

I could tell I was achieving the desired results when she sighed and let her head fall forward, allowing me better access to her neck. That was when I allowed my hand to touch her breasts, moving from one to the other, holding, squeezing, rubbing the stiffening nipples through the rough fabric of her tunic, as she began to make little squirming motions, pushing her chest into my stroking hand.

Smiling secretly to myself, I simultaneously drew Siann back down onto the bed and deftly untied the drawstring on her trousers. She made no protest as I stripped her of her pants, leaving her tunic to cover most of her body, but exposing her crotch. I slid down to the floor, kneeling beside her legs, which still hung over the edge of the bed. At first, she kept her legs crossed, still trying to squelch her desire, but after my talented mouth had licked and sucked her thighs for a time, and my seeking fingers had probed as far as they could into her groin, she opened herself to me, eyes closed, head thrown back, lost in her own sensations.

I moved between her outspread legs, parting the folds of heated flesh and licking at her eager clitoris with light, teasing flicks of my tongue. As she thrust herself up into my face, I got more fully into it, sucking and licking more strongly, but still carefully. An occasional twinge of pain shot along the side of my face from my jaw, but I ignored it, too intent on winning the contest.

Oh yes, I know how to do this. I've always found it distasteful, but so are a lot of other things in life. Telling myself sternly that sometimes one must do what one doesn't particularly like to do, I bent all my efforts to bringing Siann to a climax, using my hands on her straining breasts as skillfully as I was plying my tongue on her nether regions.

It didn't take very long to produce the desired effect. She moaned, gasped, squirmed, and cursed at me, but she came, and she came hard.

I sat up, grinning at Iolaus. There was a hair wrapped around my tongue and I considered spitting, but decided that would be just too rude. Instead, I discreetly removed it by wiping my sleeve across my mouth.

Iolaus, meanwhile, kept a solemn and serious look on his face as he held up a finger and announced, "Score one for Euphonius. Your turn, Siann."

She was still catching her breath, but she gave me that mocking false smile and said, "I never thought you had it in you, Sweetie."

I fixed her with a smug glare as I got up off my knees. "Never assume that a man is incapable of doing something, just because he usually chooses not to do it." 

Her hand snaked out to my crotch, where she couldn't help but notice my limp cock. She shook her head. "Not even turned on, huh? Well, we'll have to do something about that."

Now it was my turn to cross my arms. I was pretty damn confident that no woman alive could make me hard, if I didn't want it to happen. "Go ahead. If you think you can."

But instead of trying to caress my sagging manhood into stiffness, she gave me a crafty look and moved up alongside Iolaus, who now sat tailor-style on top of the pillows at the head of the bed. She took hold of his vest and began sliding it slowly down off his shoulders.

"Hey!" I protested. "No fair! You're not allowed to touch him unless you win the contest."

"Look closer, Sweetie. I'm not touching him. I'm touching his clothes."

I glanced indignantly to Iolaus to render a verdict. He smiled and shrugged. Okay, so it was legal.

With a triumphant grin, Siann went on to remove his boots, at the same time tugging him down onto the bed so he was lying beside her. Very careful not to actually touch his skin, she unhooked his belt and began working his leather pants down over his hips.

I closed my eyes, determined that her ruse wouldn't work. Unfortunately, my imagination supplied the details, even if my eyes couldn't. This wasn't helping. I gave up, opened my eyes, and relented far enough as to sit down on the edge of the bed, partly to hide my growing erection.

I realized that Siann had stopped right where she was when she had seen me refuse to look, and was now taking up where she had left off. Still making an elaborate show of not quite touching Iolaus, she continued to pull his leather pants down over his hips. The little traitor even helped out by lifting his body up far enough to make things easier for her! I'd have been angry at him, if I hadn't been so entranced by the amused expression on his face, not to mention the tufts of blond hair already showing at his groin.

He gave a long sigh as the edge of his trousers cleared his erect cock. Or maybe I was the one who sighed. I'm not entirely sure. The only thing I was sure of was that my cock was by now just as hard as his. Score one for the scheming wench who stopped her efforts to undress Iolaus and smiled at me gloatingly.

"Come on, Sweetie. Lie down and get comfortable. You can take off your clothes yourself, or you can let me do it."

Bowing to the inevitable, I stripped quickly and laid down next to her, determined not to react to anything she might do. I willed my cock to stop being so eager, but, with Iolaus still lying half-naked on the far side of the bed, that was a losing battle right from the start.

For a long moment, Siann just sat there, raking my body with her eyes. "Not bad, for an old dude," she finally concluded.

"Hmph! I doubt I'm that much older than you are," I retorted.

"Perhaps not." The vicious creature continued to look at me, as I firmly squelched the impulse to squirm.

"Could use more muscle," she remarked at last.

I didn't even dignify that with an answer.

"Now, how do you like it, Sweetie?" she persisted. "Do you prefer to lead, or follow?"

Not wanting to make things any easier for her, I didn't answer that either.

"Cat got your tongue? Okay, guess I'll have to find out for myself."

With that, she swung her leg over me so she was sitting on my thighs, then grabbed my hands and pinned them down at my sides. As soon as I got over my surprise, I tried to pull loose, but I'm ashamed to have to admit that she was not only taller than I am, but also stronger. Of course, it doesn't take a whole lot to be stronger than me, but still –-

She leaned forward, and for a moment I thought she was going to kiss me. But she didn't. Instead, she did as I had done to her, licking and kissing at the unbruised side of my neck and shoulders. My cock was pressed between our bodies, and seemed to be enjoying its position, much as I insisted that it not do so.

When she latched onto one of my nipples, I couldn't suppress a moan. And when she discovered that I enjoyed having her bite and suck hard on my chest and shoulders, she went at it even more enthusiastically. Her tongue became a small darting flame, scorching everything it touched as she moved here and there, first licking and then attacking viciously.

My eyes were closed and my head thrown back against the pillow. I was still trying to will my cock to stop its eager straining when she raised herself up and sat down on top of it in one swoop.

All right, so I was fucking a woman, even if she was the one doing most of the work.

My mind still insisted that I would not come, but the rest of my body disagreed strongly. In the end, as you might have guessed, my body won the argument, especially since I was so very conscious of Iolaus' presence, and the knowledge that he was watching us. The best I could do was to refrain from making any sounds that might indicate enjoyment, even as I emptied myself into Siann.

Satisfied, she got off of me as if she were dismounting from a horse, grabbing for a towel that hung near the bed and wiping herself off quickly and efficiently. After that, she tossed the towel at me so I could do likewise. 

Doubtless as a result of post-orgasmic mellowness, I almost admired her deliberately nonchalant attitude towards the whole thing. Now that I thought about it, I realize it was only Siann's sexual pushiness that had landed us all in bed together in the first place. I'd never have come on to Iolaus so flagrantly myself.

"It's a tie," Iolaus declared cheerily. "Looks as if you both get the prize."

Siann and I looked at each other for a moment. Then, making common cause, we both pounced on Iolaus, dragging off his boots and removing his trousers completely. At that point, I must confess to being rather uncertain what to do next. I simply was not used to having a woman as part of the action. 

Siann, however, seemed to have some ideas. "So we both win?" she asked sweetly, as she moved up alongside Iolaus, kissed him hard on the mouth and simultaneously slid him down further towards the foot of the bed. Breaking off the kiss, she let her eyes wander down the length of his body thoughtfully. There was a strange tone to her voice as she said, "Now, how can we share a treat like you?"

"How about I just lay back and let you two have your way with me?" Iolaus answered cheekily, looking from one of us to the other. 

I was staring hungrily at his still-hard cock, not entirely happy with the situation.

"Go on," Siann encouraged me. "I like to watch sometimes, too." 

Well, performing for a woman wasn't my usual style, but it was far from the most outrageous thing I had ever done in my life. I moved between Iolaus' legs and ran my hand up and down his shaft. He closed his eyes and settled himself more comfortably on the bed. Slowly, while trying to ignore Siann, I tried to take his straining cock in my mouth, only to find that I couldn't open my mouth that wide without pain. With an apologetic smile, I went back to using my hand, along with my tongue.

"Oh, Euphonius, that is so good," Iolaus sighed, thrusting lightly with his hips. Siann leaned over, so he could take one of her breasts in his mouth. I was almost jealous as I watched him bite and tease the nipple. Siann made a happy noise, and leaned completely over him, taking hold of his wrists and raising his arms above his head.

As I worked harder on his cock, using my favorite twist and slide up over the head and back again, I was rewarded with a groan and another thrust of his hips. 

"Do you like that, buddy?" Siann purred. "Both of us together?"

She only got a groan in response as I weighed his balls in my other hand, gently squeezing the sensitive testes within. I was getting into it, almost able to believe that Siann wasn't there, until I felt Iolaus jerk against me and go completely tense.

"Siann, let me go," Iolaus demanded.

I heard her laugh, and looked up somewhat awkwardly. She had maneuvered him so far down on the bed that she could kneel above him, her hands locked hard over his wrists as she held his arms pinned down. For his part, Iolaus struggled against that inexorable grip, trying to free his hands. As he did so, the muscles in his arms and chest showed tautly under the skin. It was a rather nice view, from my position between his legs.

"Siann --" Iolaus warned. 

I left off my rhythmic stroking, wondering if he was really angry, or just pretending to be. My uncertainty must have shown in my face, because Siann said, "Don't worry, he enjoys it this way." She pointed with her chin to his cock, which was as hard as it had been before. Then she leaned over and bit his nipple, drawing a hiss and a groan from his lips. "There, you see?" she assured me. "Five minutes, Euph. If he's soft or still complaining, then I'll let him go. Deal?"

I looked at Iolaus, who was watching us but no longer struggling. I had to admit, seeing him held like that with his cock standing hard was a temptation that would be difficult to resist. I licked his cock and then ran my tongue around the head. He groaned and twisted, but the thing that gave him away was how he spread his legs when I did it.

I grinned at him. "You do like it, don't you?" 

"Sure he does," Siann answered for him, as she moved to his other nipple. 

That was when the real competition between Siann and I began. We both started seeing who could draw the greatest number of moans, groans, hisses or pleas from our helpless captive. It didn't take long before he was begging us to stop teasing and get on with it.

"Enough, you two! Please! I am not your private play toy."

"No, you're not," Siann agreed in a silky sweet voice as she pushed his head over and chewed on his neck until he moaned again. "You're the prize. So just lie back and enjoy the ride. Euph and I are gonna drive you nuts."

"Euphonius!" I corrected automatically. She just looked at me and grinned. 

"He's gonna do you now," she whispered to Iolaus, and I watched his cock jump just at her words. That was clearly my cue. I got up off the bed and retrieved the small vial of scented oil that I always carry with my travel supplies. Still a little unsure of myself, I held it up for Iolaus to see clearly. "You okay with this?" 

"Oh, fuck," Iolaus panted, but his squirming gave me my answer. No doubt about it, he was enjoying himself.

Coming back to the bed and leaning down, I kissed him, forcing my tongue deep into his mouth. I had never been this aggressive with Iolaus before. In fact, thinking back on the first time we'd met, he had usually been the one taking the initiative. There was something exciting about having him held down and displayed before me this way, and it was something that awakened uncomfortable feelings in the back of my mind. 

But I had no time to care about that now. I wanted him badly. I laid down on top of him. He squirmed again, clearly trying to rub his swollen cock against my groin. "Hold still," I ordered, and was almost surprised when he promptly obeyed.

For just this one brief moment, Iolaus was mine. He might never be so again, for who could know what life might bring? But for now, he was mine, and I kissed the supple skin of his chest, feeling hard muscle underneath. That's what I love about men: the hardness, the sharp edges, the power and strength. Not the mushy softness of a woman's curves and crevasses. Although I had to admit that there was precious little softness about Siann. Ah well, I reminded myself, she was the exception, not the rule.

When I was possessed by another man, I loved his power, his hunger, his need. And when I was the one doing the possessing, his strength was mine, his courage mine, his body mine. There would be no squalling infant nine months later, no tearful recriminations, no protestations of everlasting love. No, just a meeting of two equals, for pleasure, for lust, and maybe to strengthen the bonds between us, so we would be more than simply friends, but nothing less than fellow men. 

"You are being cruel, Euphonius," I heard him gasp.

Siann laughed darkly, and I found myself enjoying the game. I settled myself back between Iolaus' legs and pressed a finger against him. He relaxed, and as I entered him, Siann leaned forward to bite sharply at one of his nipples. Iolaus came off the bed, and nearly pulled completely away from me. 

"Darling, he ain't in the mood for wine and roses. Let's get this going," Siann stated crudely.

I almost balked, but then I went with it, and purposely pressed my finger on that spot deep inside a man that can cause such pleasure, as Iolaus writhed and twisted against my probing hand.

After several moments of this, Iolaus opened his eyes and for a moment I froze. I saw an anger there I hadn't seen since -- Dahok. 

"Fuck me," he ordered hoarsely.

"Do it," Siann said. I lifted his legs over my shoulders. Quickly slathering oil on my cock, I pushed myself into him without further ado. He cried out, which only served to encourage me further. His ass was hot and tight and I could feel him squeezing me.

It didn't take long for Iolaus to moan and spasm around my cock. And yet, the memories of Dahok continued to haunt me, even as I drove myself rhythmically into the willing body before me, struggling to reach my own release. That was then. This is now. This is Iolaus, not some monstrous embodiment of evil. This is Iolaus, a man I respect and admire with all my heart. This is Iolaus, for whom I would give my very life, if necessary. This is Iolaus, and he has offered himself to me. 

I cried out quietly as white lightning spread outwards from my cock.

When I came to myself, I was sitting back on my knees, while Siann leaned on her arms over Iolaus.

"You two are cruel and inhuman," he gasped and then started laughing. Siann and I joined him, as she finally released his arms.

As soon as we were off guard, Iolaus pounced. Grabbing Siann roughly, he flipped her over onto her back and rolled on top of her. "All right, woman," he growled menacingly, "From here on, you're going to do what I say. I know this was all your idea, so Euphonius can just sit there and watch you get what you deserve."

I thought sure she was going to toss him across the room, since she outweighed him considerably and had the strength to do it. In fact, I was prepared for just about any reaction from Siann except what she did. She relaxed in his grip and replied meekly, "As you wish."

"Hands above your head and keep them there," he said, then proceeded to arouse her with varying amounts of gentleness and pretended cruelty, until they were both going at it full force, with him on top for a change. 

I made a point of keeping any least hint of jealousy or resentment out of my face as I watched the two of them getting it on. I wanted to appear relaxed, maybe even happy, at seeing their mutual pleasure. The fact that I actually did find myself happy at observing their enjoyment took me by surprise. I really wasn't jealous. Could that be possible?

There was a couple of times that what they were doing almost but not quite bothered me, because it was just too close to things I'd seen Dahok do to other people while he'd worn Iolaus' body. I had to remind myself that Dahok had seldom had their full cooperation and consent, while this –- well, this was a game, as anyone with half an eye could clearly see. Nevertheless, it had turned me on then, and it turned me on now. I was soon avidly jerking myself off in time to their rhythm, and we all came again, pretty close to simultaneously.

Finally we collapsed limply together on the bed, catching our collective breath. It was only then that a terrible thought occurred to me. 

"Uh – Siann --" I began. "Is there any chance you could get –- I mean, we've both --"

She caught my drift and laughed. "Don't worry, I'm too old for babies, if that's what you're trying to say. Isn't that just like a man?" she asked the universe in general, shaking her head. "When it's all over, that's when they ask. As if there's anything they could do about it by then."

Iolaus and I tried our best to look sheepish and contrite.

She rolled off the bed. "I would like to clean up just a little, though. Where's the washbasin? Oh, never mind. I see it over there."

Fitting her actions to her words, Siann strolled across the room. She grabbed a towel, dipped it in the tepid water, and turned away from us in order to gain what little privacy she could, under the circumstances.

I slid closer to Iolaus and kissed him gently on the lips, then broke off the kiss, content to just smile blearily into his eyes. This would have been the time to say, "I love you", had it been something I wanted to say. It would also have been the time for him to say it to me, had it been what he felt.

He blinked, and the blue eyes loosed themselves from mine. "Uh – Euphonius --" he began softly, uncomfortably, a shadow crossing his face.

Deliberately, I put a finger on his mouth before he could say more. There were no "I love you's" here, and I knew it.

"No promises," I replied, more a matter of my lips forming the words than my voice actually saying them. None of this was anything I wanted Siann to hear. "But if you ever do need someone, I'll be there," I finished.

His lips tightened into that determined look he has. He nodded his head a fraction to show that he understood, just as Siann plopped down onto the bed again.

The sleepy daze of happy satiety fell over us then like a fleecy blanket, as we lay there entangled. Iolaus was the first to succumb and doze off, his head on Siann's shoulder while I was snuggled against his other side. The sore muscles where I'd been punched had begun to stiffen a little, now that I was in a condition to notice them again. I sighed.

Siann raised her head so she could see my face and said softly, "This isn't just screwing around, is it? You really care about him."

"Whatever gave you that idea?" I asked, still unwilling to make myself vulnerable to this woman.

"Oh, little things. Like the look in your eyes sometimes, or the way you touched him. Or the words that you seem to want to say, but don't."

"Okay, yes, I care. But he belongs to Hercules. I know that."

"So do I," she said, very seriously. "Too bad for the rest of us, eh?"

I sighed softly as I admitted, "Yeah. Too bad."

There was a thin film of sadness in her eyes as she said, "Maybe we do have something in common after all, huh?"

"Could be," I admitted. Then I couldn't resist adding impulsively, "Maybe more than you think. Look, I know I'm not a warrior like you are. But I've fought my own battles. I know pain, and I know what it's like to try to protect something, only to have it slip away no matter what I do." Dahok, my conscience whispered to me. Unwillingly, I added, "And I know what it's like to have to live with things I'm sorry that I've done."

She closed her eyes in what might have been a wince of pain, and nodded a fraction, then surprised me by reaching over and drawing a hand down my cheek in a gentle caress. "Go to sleep," she murmured.

I snuggled closer against Iolaus, enjoying the lazy, comfortable feeling that usually comes after sex. Even as I lay there, I couldn't help thinking just how very rare and precious this was. How often did I have his body close against mine, or feel the slight motion of his chest as he breathed, peacefully asleep and safe by my side? In that brief moment, I had all I ever wanted. But moments like that don't last, except in memory, and this one was no exception.

I was almost asleep when the urgent sound of a gong invaded my drowsy musings, repeated over and over. I tried to ignore it, but Siann's voice cried out, "Iolaus, get up! That's the alarm! There's trouble!"

Alarm? Trouble? Had I heard that right?

I sat bolt upright in the bed, no longer even the least bit tired. On either side, my companions were hastily pulling on their clothes and boots.

"What's going on?" I asked, searching belatedly for my own trousers.

Siann gave me her trademark mocking grin. "Why knows? Maybe it's those nasty pirates you were so worried about."

"Pirates?" I repeated stupidly.

"Yeah." She strapped her sword around her waist. "You know, those awful people who attack and raid nice little towns like ours?"

I turned to Iolaus, my eyes pleading for reassurance.

"Don't worry," he said. "It's probably nothing. You stay here while we check it out."

Then they were both gone, in a clatter of steel and boots going down the stairs.

As I got dressed, I thought about what Iolaus had said. But I didn't stay there, since I didn't know where Dari was, or what was going on. I splashed water into my face from the bowl on the nightstand, trying to force my muzzy brain to think faster.

The entire interlude had surely not lasted long. Outside the window, it was still light. Early afternoon, at the latest. Where would Dari be? That was easy: still hanging out with her heroes on the practice field. But they'd have gone to answer the alarm. Certainly, they'd have told her not to follow them, but would she have obeyed? I wanted to think so, but knowing Dari –

I set out to find the girl. People were running around the streets in a panic, women screaming for their children, and men and boys rushing this way and that, grabbing up makeshift weapons.

"What's going on?" I asked a boy, snagging him by the arm as he ran past.

"Pirates!" he gasped. "Tellis and his gang anchored their ship somewhere and are attacking us from the hills!"

He jerked his arm away and I let him go.

Cursing equally my own ill luck and my own stupidity in coming here, I fought my way along the street towards the place where I hoped to find Dari. I suppose I should have noticed that most of the townspeople were now running in the other direction, but I was too intent on my goal to pay attention.

The practice field was deserted as I stumbled up the rise, gasping for breath from the run. "Dari!" I yelled, in between trying to catch my breath.

A soft voice came from behind a nearby bush. "Over here, Uncle Euphonius. Quick!"

I discovered her squatting behind the bush, her staff across her knees and her eyes trained on the far end of the field, where I could hear shouting and the general commotion of a skirmish.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

"Shh," she hissed, not even glancing at me. "Vachon told me to hide and keep watch on their rear, then run to warn the town if things looked bad. Get down and out of sight."

Instead of taking her eminently sensible advice, I pulled her to her feet and started back towards the town. "We've got to get out of here."

But Dari dug in her heels. "Uncle Euphonius --"

"Come on! I don't want anything to happen to you."

"I can't just run away."

"Of course you can," I replied angrily, pulling even harder on her arm. "You're a child."

"No. I'm a warrior."

"Dari --"

I stopped when I saw a stranger appear from the side of the field, running toward us with a heavy club raised above his head.

Without thinking, I whipped the knife out of my boot and threw it at him. 

And missed. Oh yeah, I hit him, but only in the arm, not in the chest, as I had intended. An arm wound won't stop someone.

I was so surprised at my poor aim that I stood there staring at him for too long a moment before I turned to Dari, shoving her toward the town and telling her fiercely, "Run. No arguments. Go!"

I started to turn back to face our attacker, but something heavy and hard came down across my back, and I fell. As I rolled myself into a ball, the club smashed into the arm I had covering my head, then fell again and again. I could do nothing, under the fierce rain of blows. When it stopped, I fully expected to feel a sword thrust through my body.

 

Without warning, the pain was gone, and I seemed to be floating, looking down at myself, with an armored man standing over me, sword drawn. I wondered quizzically if I was dead yet, or just about to be. Then I saw Dari running at my attacker, shrieking like a banshee, her little dagger in her hand, held low in a proper fighting stance. "No!" I tried to say, but no sound came from my mouth. "Run! Run! You can't win!"

I struggled to move, but could only float motionless. Then it all began to spin around, faster and faster, and I found myself falling down a long, dark tunnel, panic-stricken. There was a faint light somewhere up ahead. I was moving toward it. With an effort, I fought down the panic and concentrated on the growing light. Images flashed through my mind, images from my life. They went so fast that I could hardly take it all in, but the most important moments seared themselves into my mind as they flew fast. Some part of me decided this was my life flashing before my eyes, and I was being asked to make a judgement of it. 

You'd be surprised at the things that turned out to be on the positive side of the ledger. And also some of the negative things. Not always what I had thought, if you'd asked me about it before all this happened.

I hit solid ground, rolled a bit, then came to a stop.

Cautiously, I climbed to my feet. I was in a dimly lit cavern of stone, with a dark river flowing sluggishly through it. I took a few steps forward, marveling at the stalactites hanging from the shadowy ceiling high above and the massive stalagmites jutting up from the ground. When nothing awful happened, I moved on towards the river. Hearing a strange noise from the direction of the water, I squinted out into the mist hanging just above the surface and caught sight of a weird boat approaching the shore, with an even weirder person pushing it along with a pole.

I stood frozen in amazement as he brought his boat alongside the bank and stepped ashore. He was even odder up close, with a greenish face, large hooked nose, black lips and broken teeth. A ragged black cloak and hood covered most of his body and head, but his hands were gnarled and claw-like. 

Noticing me, he frowned then gestured toward his boat, and said grumpily, "Well, don't just stand there wasting my time. Get in. And you'd better have a coin for me. I don't do this for the fun of it, ya know."

I still stood there staring, unable to make sense of his instructions.

When I didn't comply immediately, he shook his head in disgust and muttered to himself, "It ain't fair. It just ain't fair. I'm expected to work my fingers to the bone, and half these mortals don't even have the foresight to bring one little coin along with them, to repay poor old Charon for his trouble. I gotta talk to Hades about putting me on salary, then I wouldn't have to put up with all these passengers thinkin' I'll take them for free, just out of the goodness of my heart."

The truth was beginning to penetrate my unwilling mind. This was Charon, ferryman of the dead.

"I – I don't have a coin," I said uncertainly. Recalling the ruby ring I had bought, I slid it off my finger and held it out to him. "Would you consider this instead?"

He turned his baleful gaze onto my hand and retorted, "A ring with a shiny pink stone? What, do I look like Aphrodite or somethin'?

"Uh –- no. Not really."

"Then what would I want with your fancy jewelry?"

"Well, it's worth quite a bit --"

"It is?" He leaned in closer, then drew back. "Wait a minute." Much to my dismay, he took hold of my arm, squeezing it in his clawlike fingers. Then he sniffed at me experimentally. "Why are you wantin' to cross the Styx anyway? You ain't dead yet."

"I ain't? Uh – I mean, I'm not?"

He took another sniff, then shook his head. "Definitely not. Don't smell dead. I can tell." 

"You're sure I'm not dead?" I replied, more in surprise than relief. After all, my last glimpse at my body hadn't boded well for my survival. I wouldn't have been the least bit surprised if Dari turned up here soon also, judging by what had been going on.

Shaking his head impatiently, Charon retorted, "Nah. Close maybe, but not dead."

"Then how come I'm here?" I waved my hand at the rocky cavern surrounding us. Maybe I should delay a while, in case Dari did appear. 

"Dunno." He glowered at me, perplexed. Then he thrust his awful face close to mine. "OK, buddy. What are you trying to pull? What's a live mortal doing at my ferry landing? Is this some kind of surprise inspection the boss is pulling on me? Checking up on old Charon? What's the story, eh? 'Fess up."

I backed away. "I don't know. I'm as puzzled as you are. Really."

"You ain't working for Hades?"

"Oh, my goodness no! Never met the fellow." And don't particularly want to, although the God of the Underworld is said to be quite attractive.

Charon seemed stuck on that piece of information. Then he made a decision. "All right then, if you're not dead, you're wastin' my time. Go on now," he said, making a shooing motion with his hands, "Get outta here!"

"Where am I supposed to go?"

"Back where you came from. Shoo! Away with you!" 

He turned his back on me and started for his boat.

Frustrated and irritated, I grabbed his dingy black cloak and tugged on it insistently.  
"Wait a minute. I don't know how to get back." 

As he swung around to face me, strange visions danced through my head. Images of blood and battlefields that I had never known personally. The memory of being beaten, just before I found myself here. Faces of old warriors, blinded, mutilated, limbs missing, bodies twisted in constant pain. And the certain knowledge that there were fates worse than death, like living with your mind already dead, raving in a locked room, or just staring out at an empty world from an empty soul.

Maybe it would be wiser to quit while I'm ahead, now that I know there truly is some sort of existence after death. There was always the possibility that I had a good chance at the Elysian Fields right now, but who knows what could happen later in my life? If I went back, I might screw things up entirely, even if it turned out that I recovered fully from whatever wounds I had taken.

I shook off these unencouraging thoughts and added, to Charon, "I'm not sure I want to go back, even if I could."

"Huh? Why not, buddy?" Shaking his head, he muttered to himself, "Most mortals cry and carry on when they find themselves here, and this one doesn't want to leave." He tapped his head with a knowing gesture. "Crazy."

If I were to get any sort of help from the old man, I would have to explain my hesitation. 

"I was in the process of being beaten pretty badly when I found myself here. How do I know I won't go back and just have to suffer all kinds of pain and stuff, then just die again in a few days? Or worse, live as a demented cripple?" I shuddered at the thought of such a thing. "Maybe I'm better off out of it all, at this point."

"Yeah, sure. And you'll love it in Tartarus, I suppose?"

"I – was rather hoping for the Elysian Fields," I replied diffidently.

"Ha! They're all hoping for that, pal. But they don't all make it."

"Really? That seems rather unfair."

"Hey, I don't make the rules. I'm just the ferryman." Nevertheless, he seemed taken aback by my question. The twisted, blackened face contorted into an even more macabre expression that could have indicated a hidden pain. "You really want to know the truth about that?" he asked me, with what seemed an attempt at confidentiality.

"Yeah."

"There really ain't very many people in Tartarus. You haveta be pretty evil to earn that kinda punishment." 

"But what about all those stories --?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know all that. You mortals just love to exaggerate, don't you? Even so, didya ever actually count up how many people they're about?"

"Well, no."

"Not very many, I can tell ya that for sure." He glanced around, as if afraid of being overheard. "Don't tell no one, but Hades ain't a bad guy, for a God. He can be pretty merciful, if you ask him nice and don't piss him off."

"Thanks. I'll keep that in mind." I held my hand in front of me, ostentatiously examining the ruby ring I still held. If he liked coins and valuables, maybe a little bribery would get me even more information. "You don't happen to know who goes where, do you?" I asked casually.

"Me? 'Course not! Like I said, I'm in charge of transportation, not judgement."

"Oh." Clenching my fist around the ring, I stood there hesitantly. The Elysian Fields were supposed to be very nice, but still, could I be sure I wouldn't end up in Tartarus, even after what the old man had said about it being rather sparsely populated?

Much to my alarm, Charon put a hand on my shoulder, drawing me to the riverside to face his boat. "All right, make up your mind, pal. I don't have all the time in the world, ya know."

"But --"

"But, but, but!" He threw up his arms in exasperation. "Trouble with your kind is you think too much. It's very simple: you wanna stay here or you wanna go back? Which is it?"

The bloody images ran through my mind again, coupled with a vision of myself terribly mutilated, living out the rest of a short and wretchedly painful life. Or worse, living on for years with no real mind left, cared for only until my wealth ran out, then cast into the street to die a miserable death. 

I shrugged and tried very hard to keep any hint of self-pity out of my voice. "Maybe I should just stay, now that I'm here. There's really nothing to go back to. It's not like I have a family or anything. Nobody would miss me all that much."

Charon studied me, his eyes narrowed. 

With a gesture of one twisted hand, a scene flared into being next to us. Dari stood at my bedside, tears running down her face even as she attempted to put on a brave front. On the other side of the bed, Iolaus knelt next to my bandaged head, whispering in my ear, "Come on, buddy. Don't give up. You can make it." Were there tears shining in those blue eyes?

I heard Charon's voice, sounding almost kind now. "Nobody, huh?"

The pathetic picture dissolved, and I was standing once more on the shore of the River Styx.

Charon leaped down into his boat, waving up to me. "OK, sure, there's nothing for you to go back to. So you just hop on down here and we'll be off. I've wasted enough time on this one fare already. Got lots more work to do." 

I hesitated.

"Come on, then," he repeated. "Don't stand there goggling at me! Give me that fancy little ring of yours and we'll be off."

I thought again of Dari's tear-stained face, and Iolaus' words. If that had been a true vision, at least they were both still alive and well.

Could it be possible that Iolaus really did care a lot about me, even if it was nothing like what he felt towards Hercules? In my mind, I saw again his taut body, stretched out on the bed between me and Siann. He'd enjoyed the sex, no doubt about that. But was there anything beyond that? Yes, of course there was. There always had been, even if it couldn't be called love.

And Dari. Wouldn't it be great to watch her grow up, see what kind of a woman she was going to turn into? Well, but I could see that from the Elysian Fields, couldn't I? Yeah, but I couldn't help her along, couldn't be really there to advise her or provide for her or anything.

But if I were to go back to my life, and be nothing but a mindless vegetable? Did I really want Iolaus to remember me that way? And would I be any use at all to Dari? Was it worth the risk? 

Charon cleared his throat impatiently and I knew I had to choose, one way or another.   
"No," I said, stepping back away from the waiting boat. "I – I think I'll stay."

The ferryman shrugged elaborately, then pointed at the far end of the cavern. "Up to you, pal. Just head on back that way, and you'll get there."

As I turned and started walking, the world began to fade to black around me. The last thing I heard was that irascible voice behind me saying, "I lose more fares that way." A gruff chuckle. "Oh well, less work for old Charon. I can use the rest."

Then I saw before my eyes the bedside scene that Charon had showed me, and it felt as if I were being pushed back into my bruised and beaten body, being forced once more into a cramped and uncomfortable place.

The sudden pain in my head and in my right arm forced a groan from my lips. It took all my energy just to open my eyes, but when I did, I was rewarded by one of Iolaus' bright smiles and a sharp exclamation of joy from Dari. She fell on me, hugging me as best she could, while Iolaus' smile grew wider.

"Hi, buddy," he said.

I winced at the enthusiasm of Dari's hug on my bruised body, as things came into focus. My right arm was tightly bandaged and bound across my chest. If I had to make a guess, I'd say it was broken. I seemed to hurt all over. My head throbbed, and I could feel a bandage wrapped around it. But my thoughts seemed to be in good order, and all my fingers and toes moved when I tried to wiggle them. Relief washed through me like a flood.

"Hi, yourself," I replied weakly, as Dari's tears ran down onto my shoulder. I tried my best to smile.

Iolaus held a cup to my lips. "Here. Drink some of this. Siann left it for you, in case you came around. It'll help clear your head." 

I sipped dutifully, but my mind was on other things. "You'll never guess what happened to me. I was at the River Styx and I talked to Charon! I thought sure I was dead. I --"

I started to describe what had gone on, words tumbling chaotically over each other.

"Euphonius?" Iolaus interrupted, before I had fairly launched into my tale.

"What?"

"You're babbling," he said with the smile that could light up even Hades' dark domain.

"I am? No, you don't understand. It really happened that way."

"Sure, it did," he said in the same tone used to humor a madman.

"But –- but you've been there, haven't you? You've seen --"

The expression on his face warned me to drop it even before his voice told me, "Yeah, I have. But experiences in the Underworld are best kept to oneself. What happens there is for you alone to know, not anyone else."

"Oh."

Siann walked into the room, in the middle of my thoughtful silence. She placed one hand on Dari's shoulder, as she took in the fact that I was clearly back with them and in fairly decent condition.

"Dari saved your life, you know," Siann said. "She stabbed the guy who attacked you, then kept him occupied with her staff until Iolaus and I could get there."

"Are you serious? Dari beat that big lug who almost killed me? You have got to be kidding!"

"Uh-uh."

"But how could she --"

"She knew what she was doing; he didn't. No mystery there. Besides, he made the mistake of not taking a child seriously as an opponent."

"But she's so much smaller."

"Yeah," Iolaus broke in, smiling as always. "In case you haven't noticed, so am I."

He had me there.

"If you'd taken away that dagger, back when we found out she had it," he went on, "I doubt Dari would have been able to defend you with only her staff. You'd have been dead, buddy. You realize that, don't you?"

"Yeah," I was forced to conclude reluctantly. I looked at the girl with more appreciation. 

She beamed proudly at all the praise she'd heard, then laid her hand on the hilt of the knife at her belt. "This is going to be my offering for Ares, when we get to Corinth."

At that, Siann laughed loudly. "Ares? You'd give your only weapon to that son-of-a-bitch?"

Dari stared in surprise, but Iolaus just nodded sagely and suggested to me, "Speaking of Gods, as soon as you're up to it, I think we ought to make an offering to Athena, for our success against the pirates."

"Athena?" Dari exclaimed incredulously, then went on to ask the question that was on my lips also. "Why her? What's wrong with Ares?"

Siann gave another harsh laugh. "He's not the God of real warriors."

"But isn't he the God of War?" I pointed out.

"War and being a warrior don't always go together." Dari still looked puzzled, so Siann went on, "A warrior is someone who's trained and prepared to use force to defend what he or she thinks is right. That doesn't mean you can't be wrong, of course. It only means you have the training and physical power to do something. How you use that power is up to you." She gave the girl a questioning glance. "You with me so far?"

"Yeah," Dari responded, sounding rather disappointed.

"Trust me on this, kid. You're much better off to be following Athena than Ares, if you want to make the right decisions about how to use your skills. Ares is supposed to represent victory and defeat, valor and cowardice, but if you look at it closer, Athena embodies the idea of wisdom, which springs from power and deep experience, and is produced in love and fear and pain. She endures violent confrontation only as a means to peace, or in defense of the innocent." Siann smiled and shrugged apologetically, as if she realized the lecturing tone that had come into her voice. "Besides, under his façade of bravery, Ares is a coward and a kiss-ass. Remember the way he betrayed the other Gods to Dahok?"

Iolaus' lips thinned at the mention of Dahok, but he nodded. "Yeah. The big, bad God of War was willing to sell out everybody else in order to save his own hide. Real brave, huh? You want to be like that?"

"I guess not," Dari admitted unhappily. Then her face brightened and she smiled. "But I want to be like you. And like you, Siann. So if you both say we should make an offering to Athena, then Athena it is. I'll give her my dagger."

Siann clapped her on the back. "Good girl! We have a temple right here in town. It's not much, compared to the ones in the big cities, but it will do."

I almost objected, but then I thought better of it. If Dari truly was determined to follow this path in her life, I'd much rather see her emulating Athena than Ares. I knew too well what Ares was like.

"All right," I said with a long-suffering sigh. "As soon as I'm up and about, we'll go to Athena's temple."

"That's the spirit, Euphonius," the woman agreed.

"Euphonius? You actually called me by my proper name? Sure you didn't make a mistake there?"

"No mistake. Dari told me how you faced up to that guy who beat the shit out of you, trying to give her a chance to run away," she said grudgingly. "Guess you're not entirely a wimp at that."

"Gee, thanks," I replied, keeping a light tone. I had a fair idea of how very much such an admission cost a person like Siann, and I didn't want to rub it in. Turning away, she busied herself with one of her little pouches of herbs, then handed me some of that pain-killing leafy stuff.

"Hey," I said, trying to talk as I placed the crumpled leaves under my tongue, "what happened with the pirates, anyway? We obviously won, but how?"

Siann, Iolaus, and Dari all tried to tell me the tale at once. From the chaos of enthusiastic descriptions of heroic exploits and military maneuvers, I gathered that the man who attacked me had been an advance scout for a flanking movement, which failed when he didn't return to warn the rest of the pirates that Iolaus and Siann were there, ready and waiting for them, having been drawn by Dari's screams and the commotion of her battle. In the ensuing confusion, the pirates were soundly defeated, their ship captured and burned.

 

By the time a day had passed, I was feeling much better. I was still in bed, but probably could have gotten up, had I wanted to. As it was, I enjoyed Iolaus' frequent visits, and his solicitude. There can be definite advantages to being hurt and bed-ridden, so long as one isn't too badly hurt to enjoy them. 

That evening, he brought me a bowl of stew and a bottle of wine. 

"Oh, but that looks delicious!" I exclaimed cheerfully. When I made a show of struggling into a sitting position, he came over and helped me up, which I didn't mind at all. Gave me an excuse to have his arms around me, if only briefly. Before I let him go, I added, "It would be nice if these pillows were plumped up a bit higher behind me."

Iolaus promptly took hold of one of the pillows and swatted me with it, very gently.

"What did you do that for?" I asked. 

By now, he was laughing. "Because I think you're milking this for all it's worth."

"Oh, you think so, do you?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well," I began indignantly, reaching for the bowl of stew somewhat clumsily with my left hand, "it just so happens --" I changed my tone abruptly and finished with a grin "— that you're right."

He took a swig from the wine bottle as he sat on the side of the bed, suddenly serious. "You need to talk to Dari."

"Why? What's wrong?" My attention was mostly on balancing the bowl between my legs and feeding myself with my only good hand. No easy matter, I assure you.

"The man she stabbed with her dagger just died. She's been going by to see how he was doing ever since you started to recover, and she's taking it pretty hard."

I was so surprised that I dropped a chunk of meat into my lap. "I didn't know --"

"We didn't want to tell you, since you were in no very great shape yourself at first. But it was a nasty gut wound and his death was slow and painful. Dari saw some of that. I didn't discourage her, because I know how much you want her to realize the downside of being a warrior, so --"

I held up my hand. "Don't worry, you did right."

"Yeah, well, anyway, now she's pretty upset, but she won't talk to me or Siann about it. I think she's trying to show us how brave she is, or something. I thought maybe you'd have better luck."

I set my empty bowl aside and took a sip of wine. "I'm not sure she'll talk to me either, but I'll give it a try."

He stood. "I'll go find her and send her up."

I nodded, worried.

It wasn't long before the girl appeared, carrying a plate with some sliced fruit. 

"Hi, Uncle Euphonius," she said, more subdued than usual. She set the plate on the bed beside me. "Iolaus told me to bring this to you."

"Thank you, my dear. Here, why don't you sit down and have some yourself?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Well then, sit down and keep me company while I eat." I took a fig and popped it into my mouth, as she obediently perched on the edge of the bed.

After a few abortive attempts to start a conversation that had been met with a morose syllable or two, I reached over and snagged my money pouch from the chair beside the bed. Bringing out a shiny coin, I held it out to Dari and said invitingly, "A dinar for your thoughts."

"My thoughts aren't worth a dinar."

"They are to me. Here. Take it."

She did, then licked her lips hesitantly before she spoke. "I'm thinking that death isn't really a very nice thing," she said, with a bitterness in her voice that I had never heard there before. 

"No, it's not." I thought back to my experience with Charon. If that truly had been a visit to the Underworld and life continued on after death, that provided a certain amount of consolation. Even so, dying isn't a whole lot of fun, no matter how you look at it. 

"But you know that already, Dari," I went on. "You stood by my father's funeral pyre with me. And you've known other people who have died."

"Yeah." Her voice grew softer, barely audible. "But I wasn't the one who killed them."

"Ah! That makes a difference, doesn't it?"

She nodded. One hand strayed down to the dagger at her side and she ran her fingers over the hilt. "I – I think I understand a little of how Siann and some of the others feel."

"Your quick actions saved my life," I pointed out.

"I know. And I wouldn't do anything differently if I had to do it again. But he was still a human being, just like you. Or Iolaus. Or me."

"Everyone you kill will be just another human being. And if you follow the path you're on now, you will have to kill again, sooner or later."

She nodded again, fingers still playing with the knife that had taken a man's life. "But Uncle Euphonius, if I hadn't learned how to fight, you would be dead. And without Siann and the others, the whole town would have been taken over by pirates and lots of other people would be dead."

"Uh-huh. But is that what you want your life to be like? Do you really want to be the one who does the fighting? And the killing? And maybe the dying?"

"I think so. At least, I thought I did. I'm not sure." She turned anguished eyes on me. "Oh, Uncle Euphonius, I just feel so awful!"

I reached out and hugged her against me with my good arm. "There, there, my dear. If you didn't feel guilty, there would be something wrong with you."

She held tightly to me, but, much to my surprise, there were no tears. "I love you," she said at last.

"I love you too." Strange, but my father and I had said the same thing to each other, just before he died. Only now, I was the one making the reply. I smoothed her hair and kissed the top of her head. She held me for a second longer, then sat back.

Taking the wine bottle from the table by the bed, I held it out to her and said, just as I would have to another adult, "Here. You look as if you could use a drink."

She brightened at this grown-up treatment, then took a generous couple of swallows.

I looked at her, very straightforward and adult. "We'll be leaving for home in another day or so. Think about all of this carefully. You don't have to decide the course of your entire life just yet, you know. There's plenty of time."

"All right, Uncle Euphonius. I'll do that." A hint of a smile crossed her face. "May I have one of those figs now?"

I passed her the plate, entirely satisfied with the results of our little discussion.

 

The next morning, we went to Athena's temple, as planned. It turned out that we were not alone, since a good many of the other townsfolk were there, also intent on honoring the Goddess for their recent deliverance from the pirates. Iolaus had told me that the warriors who had actually fought in the battle had gotten their share of honors from the civilians as well, in the form of many feasts, celebrations, and individual monetary awards for valor.

As we stood amongst the crowd waiting to make offerings, Dari fidgeted nervously beside me, staring back and forth from the dagger at her waist to the statue of Athena behind the altar. I was pretty sure she didn't really want to give it up, whether to Ares or Athena. It had cost her a lot of hard work. It occurred to me that I could use that fact to my advantage. Offering a weapon to any God whose jurisdiction covered warfare was usually considered to be more of a commitment than other types of sacrifices, but I didn't think Dari realized that.

Awkwardly, because of my broken right arm, which was still strapped across my chest, I reached into my belt pouch and pulled out a gold coin. "Here," I whispered, slipping the coin into her hand. "Give this to Athena instead. It's worth a lot more than the dagger anyway."

She looked around from side to side to see if anyone had seen me give her the coin, then smiled and whispered back, "Thanks, Uncle Euphonius." 

As the line of worshippers moved slowly towards the altar, I congratulated myself on my success. Besides, I had also scored a point by showing myself to be sympathetic to her feelings. Maybe now she'd be more willing to listen to my advice in other matters. Maybe our little talk last night had eroded her desire to be a warrior. 

I said nothing more about it while we waited. Sometimes silence is the best policy. Let her convince herself that I was right after all. It could still happen. She could just make an offering to thank the Goddess for our safety, like everyone else was doing. It didn't have to mean anything more than that.

Iolaus and Siann were just in front of us in line, talking quietly to each other. I glanced around the crowd, seeing a few familiar faces. One-armed Vachon was easy to spot, towering above the others as he did. Myka stood next to him. 

Personally, I was rather bored. Athena isn't one of the Goddesses I usually deal with. Truth to be told, I try not to attract the attention of any of the Immortals most of the time. Much safer that way. 

By the time we finally drew near to the altar, my injured arm was throbbing unpleasantly and I felt just a bit unsteady on my feet. Too late, I realized I should have asked Siann for some more of those pain-killing herbs. However, not only was I determined to be here with Dari, but I also didn't want to show any weakness in front of Siann or Iolaus, so I said nothing about it except to wish that things would move along faster.

I couldn't hear Siann's prayer to Athena, but I saw her lay several gold coins on the altar. Iolaus, on the other hand, spoke loudly enough that I could make out several references to Xena and Gabrielle as he set down his offering. There were tears on his face as he turned away from the over-laden altar and joined Siann and me, where we waited beside Dari.

Our turn came next, much to my relief.

Without a moment of hesitation, Dari walked up and added her gold coin to the piles of other valuables already there. I expected her to move back quickly, so we could get out of there and I could go rest, but she stood for a moment, looking up at the statue of the Goddess behind the altar. The statue stared down at her sternly. Just life-size, it was a fairly realistic attempt to portray Athena, to my way of thinking. While beautiful, the oval face gave the impression of great dignity, not mere prettiness. She was depicted wearing a short skirt, with a tightly laced bodice above it, her hair done up neatly on her head. In her left hand, she held an ornate shield, while the other hand reached forward towards her supplicants. 

Much to my dismay, Dari placed her little dagger on the altar next to the coin.

Something changed in the atmosphere inside the temple. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, as if in response to some strange sort of energy. The statue shimmered with silver light, then seemed to come to life.

With a collective gasp of amazement, the crowd pulled back, leaving Dari staring open-mouthed at the Goddess of Wisdom herself. 

Out of all the riches piled before her, Athena took up the little dagger. Then her piercing gray eyes fixed on Dari, as she said, "Child, this dagger has tasted human blood. How has it been used? Have you dared to take a life at your age?"

The girl just stood there, too awed and scared out of her wits to answer.

"Forgive me, Lady," Siann said firmly, stepping forward to place herself next to the astonished child. "Dari has indeed killed, but only because she was forced to defend an unarmed man in danger of death, at the risk of her own life. Had Iolaus and I not arrived in time, the attacker might have killed them both."

"I see," the Goddess said slowly. Much to my relief, her face broke into a gentle smile as she turned her attention again to Dari. 

"Then you have acted properly, and with courage," she proclaimed. "Such a deed deserves a reward." 

Suddenly, the plain dagger in Athena's hand turned into something else: something longer and made of finer metal, with an ornate design on the handle. Next to it lay an embossed leather sheath, with a matching belt attached. 

Athena slid the knife into its sheath and held it out to Dari. "Wear this, child, as a symbol of your dedication to me."

Her face glowing, Dari took the offered gift, strapping it around her waist. "Thank you, Lady," she replied solemnly. "May I use it always in a manner acceptable to you." She glanced at Iolaus and Siann. "And may I never kill again, except in dire need."

I saw the conflicted look on Siann's face, as she heard Dari's words, and I thought I knew what she was thinking. Quickly, impulsively, I slid my ruby ring off my finger, stepped up to the altar, and laid it beside Siann's offering.

"Merciful Goddess," I said, "in your great wisdom, be mindful of another of your followers here and accept this in support of the battle she fights within her heart."

Athena apparently knew who I meant. Bending a stern and sorrowful gaze upon Siann, she leaned forward and addressed her so quietly that few others could hear. "My daughter, you know that there's no way to truly atone for the past. The dead cannot be brought back to life, the suffering cannot be undone, and the blood can never be truly washed from your hands." 

"Yes, Lady. I know that," was the sad reply.

"The only thing that can be done is to do good in the present, as best you can, in memory of the wrongs you have done in the past. Therein lies as much forgiveness as it is possible for a mortal to find."

A single tear ran down Siann's face. She nodded, but did not lower her eyes.

Athena's severe expression softened. She placed one hand on the woman's shoulder and said, so softly I had to strain my ears to make out the words, "You have done everything that could possibly be expected of you, Siann. Go in peace."

As the Goddess' form wavered, then solidified back into the statue, Siann looked up at me and smiled, a bright and genuine smile this time, not that mocking grimace she usually used.

I smiled back. Dari and Iolaus rushed over to hug her, but I stood aside, watching and thinking. No, the warrior life never had been, and never would be, mine. But did I have the right to so easily dismiss what the men and women of Gargatha had experienced, disdaining them as ruffians and trouble-makers, just because they reminded me of things I did not wish to know? Could I condemn their bitterness, their insanity, their violence, and their arrogance, when I had lived an easy and comfortable life while they were out there fighting to conquer Troy?

And if the war itself had turned out to be pretty useless, and the battles only dubious triumphs, did that detract from the courage they had shown and the hurts they had taken?

For what, after all, is a hero, if not someone who puts their life on the line in the service of something beyond merely himself, or herself, alone?

 

As we walked out of the temple together, I was turning something over in my mind as I listened to the talk going on around me. With the excitement over, I also found myself distracted by the renewed pain in my broken arm. I hugged it tighter against my chest with my good arm, wishing it would stop bothering me so that I could think clearly. I wanted nothing more than to return to my room at the tavern and rest, preferably with some of Siann's herbal medications to help me out.

Meanwhile, the conversation went on around me.

"Does Athena usually appear like that?" Dari asked, her voice still reflecting awe.

"Not usually, no. But now and then," Siann replied.

"But I'm just a little girl. Why would she bother with me?"

"Perhaps it's exactly because you are a little girl that she appeared," Iolaus suggested. "The rest of us – well, we chose our lives a long time ago. Athena knows us, but you're new to all this." Taking her by the shoulders, he turned her to face him square on. "Also, you're at a decision point. You've killed a man, Dari. You've had enough time to realize what that means. Do you truly wish to continue on the path you've started? Or would you rather go back and choose another life for yourself?"

This brought my attention firmly back to the present and away from my personal hurt. I held my breath as Dari bowed her head, then said softly with closed eyes and a catch in her voice, "I'll go on."

Not the answer I had hoped for. My hopes wilted. As Iolaus drew her into a hug, I sighed and gave in gracefully to the inevitable. "Iolaus, about that academy you mentioned a few days ago? The one Jason's running?"

Releasing the girl, he looked at me, a puzzled frown etching vertical lines between his eyes. "Yeah?"

"What would it take to get Dari into it?"

I saw Dari's eyes fly from the lovely new dagger at her waist up to my face.

"First of all, money for the tuition," Iolaus said guardedly.

"Not a problem."

His frown turned to surprise. "If you're serious, I'll be glad to give her my recommendation. I'm sure Siann would also."

Siann nodded.

"I'd appreciate that," I replied wearily.

"You mean it, Uncle Euphonius?!" Dari exclaimed. "Really?"

"Yes. As long as your mother agrees to it."

"Oh, she will! I know I can convince her." She threw herself at me, wrapping her arms around my waist and doing her best to squeeze the life out of my body, but still being mindful of my broken arm. "Thank you, Uncle Euphonius! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Don't thank me, my dear. Thank Athena. After all, who am I to disagree with a Goddess?"

Siann and Iolaus stood there, beaming at us and at each other. I think my face must have gone paler than usual, since Iolaus put his arm around my waist and said, "Come on. Let's get you back to the inn."

 

A couple of days later, as we prepared to leave, there were three horses awaiting our departure, rather than the original two. It seems that Siann and her friends had all chipped in to get Dari a mount of her own, now that it looked as if she'd need it to travel to and from the Academy. The new one was a gentle-looking grey mare, with a used but passable saddle. 

Dari was beside herself with joy when she saw her gift. I really thought I'd never get her calmed down enough for us to be on our way. She just kept hugging everyone and saying how she'd never forget them, not ever. Now and then, though, a different look would come into her eyes, a look that reminded me uncomfortably of the haunted expression I'd catch sometimes in Siann's eyes. My little Dari was an innocent child no longer.

No, I still wasn't overly pleased about the way things had turned out. But Dari was young. She might well change her mind ten times over about her future. And if she didn't? 

Well, if not, it was her life, not mine, wasn't it?

I sighed. If it was this hard for me to let go, how much harder must it be for the actual parents of a child? And yet, the child must be set free at some point, if it is ever to find its own true path.

Our plans were to stop at the Academy on our way to Corinth, since it wasn't far from the city. To that end, Siann had made up a scroll recommending Dari, while Iolaus would be with us to talk to Jason himself. If she were to be accepted, she would then go home and try to sell her mother on the idea. Dari was quite confident that she'd prevail, and I rather expected she might be right, especially with the evidence of a Goddess-given dagger and a new mare to back her up.

Iolaus swung up onto his horse, waving and whooping exuberantly at all his friends, who cheered back. 

I was about to mount up myself, hoping Dari would take the hint, when Siann strode over to me.

She measured me with her eyes for a moment, then slapped me heartily on the back, nearly hard enough to knock me down. "Hey, Euphonius!" she exclaimed. "Come back and see us sometime. Maybe I'll let you buy me another drink."

As I recovered my balance, I replied merrily, "Not a chance, you old battle-ax!"

"And since when is it an insult to be a battle-ax?" came the quick rejoinder. "It's a perfectly respectable weapon, you know."

We both laughed, then I looked doubtfully at my horse, wondering how I was going to get up into the saddle using just one hand. Realizing my problem, Siann laced her hands together, offering me a leg up. She didn't even make a remark about wimpy little merchants when she did it, but she damn near tossed me entirely over my horse in her effort to help.

Dari was still running about, hugging people and saying her good-byes. Iolaus caught Siann's eye, then jerked his chin towards the girl.

"I'll take care of it, buddy," Siann replied. I saw her trot over to Vachon and whisper in his ear, then he spoke to Myka. Before I realized what was happening, Dari had been lifted in the air and was being passed over the heads of the assembled crowd. With much hollering and cheering, they finally set her on top of her new mount. 

With a mischievous glance at Iolaus, Dari kicked her horse into a gallop and headed down the road. Accepting the challenge, Iolaus took off after her, while I followed at a more sedate pace.

As I watched them both disappear around a curve, it struck me that I wasn't hurting over Iolaus anymore. I still desired him with all my heart, but now I knew I hadn't lost him, not really.

I had to assume that he now believed I wouldn't hang onto him, or allow myself to be hurt by the fact that I wasn't the chief love of his life. After all, hadn't he freely chosen to have sex with Siann and me? Unlike several of our other encounters, it couldn't be written off as the result of drunkenness or desperation, since we had been neither. That meant it could well happen again, somewhere down the road.

Sure, there were no promises. But there are always possibilities.

Iolaus might well be with Hercules for the rest of his life, but even so, a part of him belonged to me, and always would.

I could be happy with that.

 

 

REMEMBERED A HERO

"You fought hard for your country, and you fought brave. You will always be remembered a hero."  
Hercules, in "War Wounds"

 

It all started when my housekeeper's young daughter came running into my room in tears, sobbing loudly.

"Dari, what is it? What's wrong?" I asked, wondering what could possibly have brought her to such a state. At all of thirteen years old, Dari was no crybaby. In fact, she was usually quite stoic and reserved, for a girl.

She threw herself into my arms, weeping against my shirt. "Oh, Uncle Euphonius! It's Xena and Gabrielle! They're dead!"

"Dead? How do you know? The last I heard, they were fine, and Xena had a baby."

"I was on my way home from school when I stopped to listen to a travelling bard. It must be true. He got the story from Joxer."

Half from curiosity, and half in an attempt to distract the child from her crying, I asked what had happened. Between sobs, she told me about how Xena and Gabrielle had been pursued by the remaining Gods. (Zeus and Hera had supposedly disappeared somehow, if you can believe that. I don't.) Finally, the two women had been driven over a cliff in a wagon, along with the baby girl. Gabrielle died in the fall, the infant when the wagon burned, and Xena, seeing what had happened, took poison and died in Ares' arms, despite the War God's efforts to stop her.

Assuming the tale to be true, Xena's death was a great loss to the world. She had always been a hero, fighting against injustice and cruelty, and inspiring hope in the common folk wherever she went. Pretty much like Hercules, in fact. But still, Dari's hysterics were a bit much, considering that Xena was a complete stranger.

"Why are you so upset, honey?" I soothed. "It's awful that such good people died, but you don't even know them."

Dari took a long and shaky breath, clearly trying to get her tears under control. "Xena's my hero. I want to be a warrior and fight monsters and bad guys, just like she did."

I'll be the first one to admit that I hadn't paid too much attention to my housekeeper's little girl over the years that she'd been with me, so I didn't know the child on much more than a superficial level. Not surprising, since I don't spend a lot of my time at home, given my profession as a travelling jewelry merchant. Now, however, what Dari said was beginning to worry me. She was a nice enough little kid, and I always figured she'd turn into a nice enough young woman, and then, someday, a wife and mother. Becoming a warrior just wasn't in the picture.

"I've fought a few bad guys and monsters myself, dear," I told her. "Believe me, it isn't all it's cracked up to be. It's pretty scary, not to mention just plain old hard work."

She pulled herself out of my arms and glared at me stubbornly. "I don't care. That's what I want to do."

I couldn't see letting her carry on with this absurd notion any longer.

"And what does your mother think of all this?" I asked reasonably.

She shrugged, as if Ysabel's opinion mattered little to her. "Mommy wants me to grow up to be like her, and learn to do all the things she does."

"So don't you think you'd be much better off doing as she says?"

"But, Uncle Euphonius, I thought at least that you might understand."

"I'm sorry, but I don't. Being a warrior isn't for girls."

"Xena did it, and she's a girl."

She had me there. "Let's just say that Xena was a very special girl. Most girls don't grow up to be like her."

"I will."

"I doubt it. Someday you'll find a nice young man and --"

"— and clean his house, cook his meals, and have his children, the way Mommy does for you." She stopped for a moment, considering. "Well, not having children maybe, but all the rest of it. I don't want to do that. It's boring."

What could I say? It did sound awfully boring, the way she described it. Not exactly what I'd want for my own life, but then, I'm a man.

"Your mother doesn't seem to mind," I replied lamely.

"I'm not my mother and I'm not gonna do it!" she retorted, hands on hips.

I fell back on that tired old cliché, which also just happens to be true. "You'll feel different about it when you grow up."

"No, I won't," she informed me emphatically. "Oh, you just don't understand!"

With that, Dari burst into tears once again and ran out of the room, much to my relief. I figured if I gave her a few days, she'd get over this silly notion.

 

I thought I had handled everything just fine, and was congratulating myself on being so good with a child who, after all, wasn't even my own, when she came up to me later that day while I was gathering things together for my travelling pack, looked me square in the eye, and asked, "Uncle Euphonius, you're going off again soon, aren't you?"

I nodded, wondering why she cared. Holding up my sea-green cotton tunic, I tried to decide between that and a heavier dark blue one.

"Where are you going?"

Definitely the cotton. Summer was coming and the days would only be getting hotter. "I've got to pick up a shipment of rubies, for a very special piece of jewelry I'm having made."

"Is that for the necklace you promised Aphrodite, after she helped you make that big sale?"

"Yep." I picked up the blue tunic and went over to hang it back in the closet.

"Why do you have to go get them yourself?"

"I want to make sure they're exactly right," I explained from inside the closet. "Pink rubies are difficult to find, but Lucama claims to have just what I want. He's an old man, not at all willing to make the trip here to Lydicea, so I'm going to him. If I like what I see, I'll deliver the jewels to the artisan on my way back."

"Will you be going near Corinth?"

As I came back into the main part of my room, I was sure she was driving at something with this persistent line of questioning, but I didn't know what it was. "Yes. That's where the craftswoman lives who'll be making the necklace."

"Will you take me along with you? I need to go to Corinth."

Ah! Now we’re getting somewhere!

"Why?"

"I want to make a sacrifice in Ares' temple."

"A sacrifice? Whatever for?"

"Ares is the God of warriors."

Oh, shit, not that again!

"No, dear," I corrected sharply. "Ares is the God of War. It's not the same."

"What's the difference? In the stories the bards tell, most of the warriors serve Ares, therefore he must be the right God for me." She crossed her arms and stared at me sternly, certain of her logic.

"Warriors aren't necessarily the same as soldiers, Dari." I sat down on the bed, all thought of packing gone from my mind.

"They both know how to fight, and they both have lots of courage," she replied firmly. "That's what I want to be. And I need Ares to help me."

"Uh –- you don't want to have anything to do with Ares. Trust me. I met him once, and it wasn't a real good experience."

Her eyes went wide. "You did? Wow! What did he do?"

I'd gotten her attention now, but I didn't particularly want it. Or, at least, not over this. "I can't tell you all the details, but it was pretty nasty."

"Uncle Euphonius!" she exclaimed in annoyance. "You can tell me. I'm a big girl now, not a baby."

"Yes, I know. But still --" I sighed, knowing I'd have to explain something about what had happened. "Remember Iolaus, from the other world, not the one in this world?"

"The cute little guy who gave my mother that fire-starting thingie, and later became a merman?" I nodded. "Yeah, I remember. I liked him."

"Well, Ares kidnapped him and -– uh –- hurt him."

"Really? How do you know?"

"I was with Iolaus at the time, and just sort of got kidnapped with him by accident."

Dari looked at me skeptically, then made up her mind. "If Ares hurt Iolaus, he must have had a good reason. The Gods know what they're doing, right?"

Now how could I answer that one truthfully, without destroying her faith in the Gods? And if I did that, her mother would be pissed off for sure. A pissed off housekeeper I did not need.

"Well, mostly they do," I temporized.

She nodded as if that decided the argument. "Then I want to go to Ares' temple in Corinth and ask him to help me."

I decided to try a different tack, since this one wasn't working. "Why do you need help from the God of War to be a warrior?"

Looking exasperated, she replied shortly, "Because I can't do it by myself."

"Why not?"

"How am I going to learn the fighting skills I need around here, in this silly little village? There's no one to teach me."

"You go to school in the village, Dari. That's what you should be studying, not how to hurt and kill people."

"I want to learn both." She crossed her arms and glared at me, the very picture of stubborn determination. "If you won't help me, I'm gonna run away."

Oops, this could be serious! I didn't want to have to scour the countryside looking for a lost child, especially when I was about to take off on an important trip. Besides, maybe taking her along would be a good idea. She was certainly old enough to start learning about the jewelry business. Possibly travelling with me would get her interested in it. She seemed dead set against marriage, so it wouldn't hurt if she acquired some firsthand knowledge of the outside world, since she might one day have to make her own way in it.

"Tell you what: if your mother agrees, you can come along, all right?"

"Great! And we can stop at Ares' temple on the way back?"

"Well, we'll see about that when the time comes. But no more talk of running away. Deal?"

She nodded and stuck out her hand. "Deal," she agreed as we solemnly shook on it. 

 

By the following day, everything was almost ready for us to leave. A message had been sent off to Lucama, advising him that I would soon be on my way. The blacksmith was putting fresh shoes on my horse. I had the supplies all packed, and the dinars I'd be carrying to make the payment if the deal went through were all carefully hidden in various places.

I was taking a well-earned nap when Dari knocked on the door to my room and announced, "You have a visitor."

Still groggy and half-asleep, I ran my fingers through my hair to smooth it into place, brushed the wrinkles out of my clothing, and stumbled out to see who it was that had disturbed my rest. As you may well imagine, I wasn't in the best of moods. Not until I caught sight of the man standing at the door, anyway.

"Iolaus! What a pleasant surprise!" I exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

He gave me his usual blinding smile and shrugged. "Visiting my mother for a few days. Thought I'd look you up while I was here."

Erytheia lived in Lydicea, the village just over the hill from my estate. In fact, I had first met Iolaus when he had stopped by to see his mother, many years ago.

I glanced around outside the door, expecting to find Hercules somewhere nearby. "Where's the big guy?" I asked with a smile.

"Oh, Herc promised Iphicles that he'd help him with some important negotiations that are going on over a peace treaty or something. Totally boring, and they don't need me. It'll probably take a couple of weeks, so I said I'd go off on my own for a bit, then meet him back in Corinth later on."

His voice was sunny and cheerful, so I don't know exactly what made me think there was more to it than he had so casually explained.

"Well, let's go to the tavern and have a bite to eat, shall we? I'd offer you something here, but my housekeeper had to go off to help one of the neighbor women, and I have no idea when she'll be back." I shrugged apologetically. "Ysabel's kind of taken over as the town midwife lately, since the last one died."

"The tavern's fine. Let's go."

"Wait a minute. I need to put on some nicer clothes. I just woke up and --"

He took my arm and dragged me out the door. "Don't worry, you look fine. Or at least no worse than I usually do. Come on. It's been a long time since lunch and I'm starving."

 

Several helpings of a spicy lamb stew and a few drinks later, we sat talking over old times at my favorite corner table at the small inn. Try as he might to sound cheerful, Iolaus had something bothering him. Underneath the bright smile, sorrow seemed to be lurking.

Eventually, he brought it up. "You heard about Xena and Gabrielle, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Real shame. My housekeeper's little girl is quite upset about it."

"Why?"

I shrugged carelessly. "You know how kids are. Xena was one of her heroes."

He thought that over for a minute. "You ever meet Xena or Gabrielle?"

"No, I'm afraid not."

"I did, many times."

"I know. I've heard the bards' tales."

He pressed his lips together. "Don't believe everything you hear. Sometimes the stories are grossly exaggerated. And sometimes, they miss things altogether."

"Care to let me know what they've missed this time? Or maybe what they've exaggerated? I've heard tell that you and Xena had a bit of a problem once."

"Yeah. But I forgave her for all that. Or at least, I tried to. It wasn't easy, watching her with Hercules, after what she'd done to me. But she had changed, and we did our best to get past that." He paused for a moment, and a vague smile came to his face, as if he were thinking wistfully of the past. "Gabrielle, now. There was someone I think I almost could have loved, if she hadn't been with Xena, and I hadn't been with Herc." He smiled up at me, securely back in the present. "It would have fit so well. You know, the two sidekicks of the two famous heroes, and all that? But Gabrielle was a sweet young woman, when I first met her. Life with Xena matured her, and made her different." He shrugged, trying to pass it off lightly. "Well, times change, and people change. It probably wouldn't have worked out, even if we'd both been free and interested enough in each other to have tried."

"So what's the problem?"

"What problem?"

"The one that's had you so down in the mouth ever since you arrived."

"I'm not –- I mean --" He scrubbed his hand over his face, then looked up at me. "Yeah, okay, I guess I haven't been my usual self, have I?"

"Not even close," I said. "Whatever it is, you can tell me about it."

He smiled slightly. "The news of Xena's death really got to Herc, even though they'd only been good friends for a long time now. I tried to console him, but it seemed like every time he looked at me, he remembered what had happened between Xena and me all those years ago. He never said anything, but I could see it on his face. That's why I was almost glad when Iphicles asked that Herc come and help him. I figured he'd get over it faster with something new to occupy his mind for a while."

"And maybe without you around to remind him of the past?"

"Yeah. That too."

"I see." I downed another draught of my ale, then went on heartily, "Well, Herc's loss is my gain. I'm sure glad to see you again. How long will you be staying?"

"Oh, just a couple of days. There are a few odd jobs my mother would like me to take care of. Pandion's a nice guy and a great poet, but he's not much of a handyman, I'm afraid. After that, I was going to go hunting for a bit and then sell the pelts. Herc may not worry about money too much, but I like for us to have a bit of cash when we're travelling." He nodded towards our savaged lamb stew and grinned. "Dinners are more reliable when you've got some dinars with you."

"I can well understand that." An idea struck me just then. "Maybe you'd like to come along with me on a business trip?" I suggested. "I've got to pick up some pink rubies, and would be very happy to have an escort on the way. I could pay you more than the worth of a few animal skins. Above and beyond your charming company --" I flashed him my best smile –- "I'd like to have you along for safety's sake. After that last little encounter I had with bandits, I'm being a bit more cautious than I used to be. If you and Hercules hadn't come along at just the right time, I'd've been dead."

"Yeah, I remember that." He changed the subject abruptly by asking, "So what are you going to do with pink rubies?" 

I got the feeling he was stalling for time, while he tried to make up his mind about my offer of employment, so I gave him the time he wanted. I told him about the rubies, and then had to recite the tale of my adventure with the other Iolaus and Nautica, and how they were happily living together in the ocean and already had a baby daughter.

"And that's how I came to owe a special gift to Aphrodite," I concluded. "Believe me, after the deal I struck with the ladies on Lesbos, I can well afford to have that necklace made up for her. The only problem has been finding enough pink rubies. I finally located a merchant who has what I need, but he lives in Gargatha --"

"Gargatha?" Iolaus interrupted me. "That seaport town a little ways beyond Epidaurus?"

"Yeah. You know the place?"

"Sure do. Got some old friends there, in fact."

"So come along with me, and you can visit them," I invited cheerfully.

"I don't know --" he replied, clearly hesitant to agree to what had seemed to me such an excellent offer on my part.

By now I thought I had figured out why. Things had gotten a little hot and heavy in the sex department, the last time I had been with him and Hercules. Maybe he was afraid I had designs on him, designs that he might not be particularly willing to draw. After all, inviting him to accompany me on a long trip, where we'd be alone together –-

Well, if that was the problem, I could fix it easily enough.

"Oh, did I forget to mention that my housekeeper's little girl will be going also? I'd really like to be sure she's safe."

Yeah, I was using Dari to try to convince him, but it was only the truth, after all. Iolaus and I wouldn't be alone together, since there would be a child with us. 

Whether or not I had guessed right, this consideration seemed to make a difference. Brightening up a bit, he asked, "How soon are you leaving?"

I revised my departure date quickly. "Three, four days from now. Will that give you enough time to finish what you need to do for your mother?"

"Yeah. Okay, count me in."

I raised my mug as if making a toast. He lifted his own, tapping mine and then drinking the rest of his ale. I did the same, and the sudden warmth in my heart wasn't only caused by the alcohol I had so quickly imbibed.

 

Four days hence, we were on the road. I had arranged for a horse for Iolaus also, so we were making good time. Dari rode behind me on my horse, her eyes wide with excitement as she started on her big adventure, but her mouth mostly closed by shyness in front of a strange man she barely knew, who nevertheless looked so much the same as the other Iolaus she had met and liked a couple of years ago. 

Dari's presence, combined with her unusual quiet, made the first day of travel somewhat strained and awkward, but she soon warmed up to Iolaus, who seemed to genuinely like children and did his best to draw her out, with a certain amount of success.

I found it a bit unsettling to watch the two of them together. It was clearly apparent to me that Dari was broadening her hero worship of Xena to include Iolaus also. This could be good or it could be bad.

 

By the second day, Dari had stopped doing such an excellent imitation of a clam. Now she was full of questions for her newfound friend. Wearying of her constant chatter, I let her ride behind Iolaus on his horse, instead of with me. At least that way one of us would get some peace.

When we made camp for the night, Iolaus went off to hunt game while I started the fire. Dari collected dry wood for me, then sat off by herself fiddling with something I couldn't quite see.

No sooner had Iolaus stepped out of the bushes carrying three fat rabbits than Dari leapt to her feet, holding a dagger in her upraised hand. With a playful grin on her face, she swung the knife at our returning hunter before I could stop her.

I don't believe he even recognized who it was, but simply reacted to something coming at him, dodging aside and grabbing Dari's arm. In fact, if he hadn't gotten a good look at her right then, he very likely would have gone on to break her arm. As it was, he merely took the dagger from her hand and released her.

"I was only kidding around," she said, staring up at the scowl on Iolaus' face.

"Shame on you, Dari. That's not how a true warrior acts," I chided her. 

Raising her head haughtily, she said to me, with a bit too much arrogance in her voice, "How would you know, Uncle Euphonius? You're not a warrior."

What could I say? It was true. I had fought no wars and won no victories –- or at least not the kind of victories she had in mind.

"Your uncle's right," Iolaus put in sternly, backing me up. "A real warrior doesn't launch a surprise attack unless she's prepared to follow through on it."

I gave Dari a "There! You see?" look as I asked her, "Where'd you get that dagger, young lady?"

"It's mine. Momma pays me to help her sometimes, especially when she has to go to a birthing." She looked at me warily, obviously afraid I was going to take it away from her. Clutching the knife tighter in her hand, she went on, "It took me a long time to get enough dinars, Uncle Euphonius. I worked hard for this."

My frown darkened. Iolaus laughed. "Hey, don't worry. There's nothing wrong with the kid carrying a dagger. Never know when it might come in handy, these days."

Even so, I debated confiscating the knife, then decided against it. Dari was a truthful child. If she said she had bought it honestly, then she had. It was not my right to take away something that belonged to her.

"Well, all right," I finally said resentfully. 

For his part, Iolaus asked the girl, "Know how to butcher a rabbit?" 

When she nodded, he pointed to the three rabbits he had killed and said, "Okay then, get busy. Let's see if you can handle that knife of yours."

Dari's smile lit up almost as brightly as Iolaus'. I don't think I've ever seen anyone skin and slice up rabbits with quite as much care and attention as she gave to the task that night, cheerfully demonstrating her skill with the sharp blade and beaming at any word of praise that came from her new hero's mouth.

When she was finished, she slid the dagger into a worn leather sheath and strapped it around her waist, glancing surreptitiously at me as she did so. I pretended not to notice.

 

Later on that evening, Iolaus and I sat around the fire together after Dari had reluctantly rolled up in her blanket and gone to sleep.

"Your niece is quite something," he remarked.

"She's not really my niece, you know. Just my housekeeper's daughter."

"Oh yeah. It's hard to remember that, when she keeps calling you uncle."

I shrugged. "She's done that for years. I never saw any reason to stop her."

"Oh no. No reason." He shook his head. "Feisty little kid, isn't she?"

"She's gotten it into her head that she wants to be a soldier. Xena's her hero." I glanced at him, and I suppose I looked as displeased as I felt. "If you haven't displaced Xena in her affections, that is."

"Nothing wrong with a kid having a hero," he replied with a disarming grin.

However, I was not ready to be disarmed just then. "Maybe not. But I don't want her growing up to be a warrior." 

"Why not? That's what I am," my companion pointed out. Whether or not he was insulted, I couldn't tell.

"No. You're a hero, and you travel around with Hercules."

"I don't see a whole lot of difference there, buddy," he replied.

"Well, I do." 

Wrapping my blanket around me, I lay down and closed my eyes, effectively ending the conversation.

 

It turned out not to be that easy to keep the conversation closed, however. Over the next few days, Dari took to spending all the time she possibly could with Iolaus, asking him about his adventures and hanging on his every word. Very quickly, it began to annoy me, but Iolaus didn't seem to mind. In fact, he appeared to be enjoying her admiration and attention.

Then it occurred to me that perhaps this was truly not hero-worship, but just a young girl's first crush on an attractive man. That notion made me a bit more satisfied, because it allowed me to dismiss the seriousness of this whole warrior business. However, it also filled me with a strange disquiet, and I couldn't quite put my finger on the reason. For me to be jealous of a child was patently ridiculous. If I wanted to be jealous, Hercules made a far better target.

The happy thought that Dari was really attracted to Iolaus and not to the idea of being a warrior didn't last very long. That very evening, we had barely dismounted when I caught the two of them apparently rough-housing together. My first impression was that Dari just enjoyed it because he was grabbing her and touching her, but then I saw them stop, and he began showing her how to do some of the moves. She listened with a sort of concentration I had rarely seen in a child, but her attention was clearly on the moves, rather than on the man.

"Dari!" I snapped. "Stop fooling around! There's a stream just through those trees over there. Go get washed. You're all dusty."

"But Uncle Euphonius, I'm busy now."

"Do as you're told, young lady."

With an exasperated glance in Iolaus' direction, she obeyed, heading for the trees as she stripped off her outer tunic.

Iolaus came over to me and started taking the saddles off our horses. "Something wrong?" he asked. "You're not usually so hard on the kid." 

Considering how I feel about Iolaus, I never thought that he could get me angry with him over anything. And yet, angry I was.

"You're encouraging her, damn it!" I replied. "You know I don't want her to be a warrior, but you're always egging her on."

"Since when?"

"Since you met her, for the Gods' sakes! Telling her all those stories of yours. Filling her head with ideas unsuitable for a little girl. Making her think she could do that kind of thing. And now even showing her how to do it."

"Hey, take it easy. Yeah, I've been talking about me and Herc, but have you heard all that I've been saying?"

"No," I was forced to admit. "She's always wanting to ride with you."

"Uh-huh. And you've been riding ahead or behind, so you didn't have to listen to all the chatter, right?"

"Yeah."

"Well, for your information, I haven't just been telling her about the heroic and fun things. I've been giving her an accurate description of the downside of a warrior's life also: the danger, the fear, the pain, and the regret over some of the things you've done."

"Can't you just refuse to talk about all that? Try to discourage her completely?"

"Euphonius, my friend, you don't discourage something by refusing to discuss it. You know better than that," he replied gently.

"Yeah, I guess I do. I'm just so worried about her, and I don't know what to do."

"I've got an idea. How about if she meets some of my friends in Gargatha? Soldiers who fought in the Trojan War?"

"We won the Trojan War. Why let her meet the victors? I'd rather we show her some of the victims instead." I shook my head, having second thoughts. "But I guess that wouldn't work, would it? Troy is a long way away, and by now it's been rebuilt and everything. Oh well, so much for that idea."

"You're right about Troy, but you're wrong about Dari."

"Oh? In what way?"

"Showing her the killing and destruction probably wouldn't discourage her any more than my telling her about the disadvantages of a warrior's life. It would be far more effective to let her meet some of the victors instead."

"What good will that do?" I objected.

"Don't show her the losers. Show her the winners. Let her see what it is that she wants to be."

"Oh sure. So she can have even more heroes. I fail to see how that would help the situation."

Iolaus snorted and shook his head, as if he were amazed at my obtuseness. Then he asked, "You know anything much about where we're going?"

"Gargatha? What's that got to do with what we were talking about?"

"You don't know, then?"

"No, not really. Just that it's a small seaport town that's been growing quite rapidly in recent years. What else is there to know?"

"Ever hear of the infamous island prison that used to be not far from Corinth called Golgoth?"

"Yeah. So?"

"Well, Gargatha was deliberately given a similar name, so the events that took place at that prison wouldn't be forgotten."

"What events?"

Iolaus looked up to the sky and gave an exaggeratedly long-suffering glance before he replied. "Remember all the trouble King Iphicles had with some of the disgruntled veterans of the Trojan War, and how he finally decided to set aside land on his northern borders for them to make a new start?"

"Oh yeah, that nasty incident at the prison. But that was quite a few years ago."

"Uh-huh. Well, some of those vets didn't want to farm, but they did like the idea of a new life on the outskirts of civilization, so they set off for the southern peninsula instead, looking for a good spot to settle down near the sea. Just an out-of-the-way place where they could fish and maybe do a little trading along the coast, since some of them had had experience on ships during the war. Along that coast, there's always problems with pirates raiding the towns, but with this group of organized warriors there, Gargatha quickly gained a reputation as a good place to be left alone."

"You're telling me we're heading to a town full of belligerent ex-soldiers and marauding pirates?!" I exclaimed.

"Not exactly." He put a hand on my arm, trying to calm me down. "The pirates haven't been a problem for years. And once the vets got the town going, other people also decided to settle there, precisely because it was so safe."

"If I'd known all this, I'm not sure I'd have brought Dari along," I replied, uncomforted by his assurances.

"But this is an excellent chance for us to try to change her mind. Like I said, I know a lot of these ex-soldiers."

"Great! I should introduce her to exactly the folks that I don't want her to imitate. We've been over this already. I don't see the point."

Another long-suffering look from my companion. "This would show her what war does to people who seek it out, even when they win."

I was still thinking about that when he went on to ask the question I had managed to keep out of my mind until then. "Euphonius, are you really just upset over my encouraging Dari, or is there something else behind it?"

"Something else?" I asked, stalling for time to think. "What did you have in mind?"

"Oh, jealousy, for one thing."

"I am not jealous of a little girl," I replied stiffly.

He grinned and punched me lightly on the arm. "Yeah, you are. Come on, admit it. You'd rather that I be paying attention to you, not her."

"That's not true. I don't --"

"Sure you do," he interrupted.

And the worst part of it was that he was right. Yeah, there had been that night with him and Hercules, but that might have been just a fluke. I was scared to death that I'd never have him in my arms again.

"Okay, okay. I want you," I admitted. "I've wanted you from the moment I first saw you. So what? I know you're with Hercules. I know you don't love me, and never will. Again, so what? This is old news."

He stopped my impassioned outburst by putting his hand over mine. "I know. And I will be your friend, regardless of whatever else happens, or doesn't happen, between us." 

As always, he smiled and my heart melted. And my cock stiffened. The world turned into that timeless moment when you each stare into the others' eyes longingly, then lean forward for a passionate kiss –- 

Iolaus drew back, shaking his head. "No, not now. I just don't feel like it."

I wasn't willing to give up quite that easily. "What's wrong? Is it because of Hercules? You know I'll never try to take you away from him. Sure, I care a lot for you, but I'm not the happily-ever-after, forever-and-ever type. You should know that by now."

Despite my sincere protestations, he looked doubtful. "It isn't always easy to hold someone so loosely. I know. I've tried it at various times. If you really want something badly, you tend to hold onto it as tightly as you can."

"I'm not like that."

"You may think you're not, and you may say you're not, but when it comes right down to it --" He made a palms-up gesture, then fixed me with a somewhat sheepish smile. "Well, things aren't always the way we think they're going to be, that's all. I don't want to end up hurting you."

He was right, and I knew it. And yet I truly was willing to hold him just that loosely, as long as I knew I could hold him at all. I'd seen him and Hercules together, and I knew I couldn't break into that partnership. The Gods knew, I'd even helped get them back together not all that long ago, when guilt and misunderstanding had threatened to end their relationship. 

"If it came to a choice," I reassured him, "I'd rather have your friendship and respect than your gorgeous body." I said that last bit with a smile and a joking tone, so he wouldn't feel I was getting too heavy. "But I'd far rather have both, if possible. I can handle it. What you and Hercules have is special. I'd never want to come between you two, don't worry. You and I, we could never have that sort of relationship. I know that. Our lifestyles are too different. I'd never expect you to --"

He silenced me by holding up one hand. "It isn't just that. I just can't. Can you understand that?"

"Yeah," I admitted helplessly. Gesturing towards the river, I added, "Besides, Dari will be back any minute. This is bad timing right now anyway. But maybe some other time?"

"Maybe. I don't know." He sounded genuinely confused. "I don't want to promise --"

This time I was the one to stop him with a wave of the hand. "No promises. I'm not looking for promises. Only possibilities."

In silence, he nodded. And I had to be content with that.

 

Later that night, I tossed sleeplessly beneath my blanket. The ground seemed to get harder and more uncomfortable no matter which way I turned, so eventually I sat up and huddled a little closer to the glowing embers of our fire, moving as noiselessly as possible so as not to wake my companions. Iolaus lay facing away from me, distinguishable only by his light hair in the faint moonlight that filtered through the trees.

Did I love him? Yes. There was no question of that. Did I want him in my bed? Yes, just as often as he wished to be there. But did I want him as a permanent fixture in my life? No, not really. As I had tried to tell him, that isn't my style of love, and never has been. That's why I live essentially alone, and like it that way.

But that didn't prevent me from burning with desire every time I laid eyes on him. Nor did it stop the wistfully lusty thoughts that haunted me whenever he wasn't around. Nor, for that matter, did it stop the hard-on I had now, just from looking at him asleep over there.

But I'm not a young stud anymore, and these days my head is more likely to overrule my cock, rather than the other way around.

So why had he turned me down? He and Herc had never promised, nor practiced, exclusive monogamy. As I understood it, they were both free to have sex with others, male or female. Maybe he really just wasn't in the mood? Maybe our little disagreement about his friends in Gargatha had upset him? No, that would be just too trivial. He had to be worried that I'd become too possessive.

So how do you convince someone that you love him so much, you'll even let him go?

I curled up again and tried to fall asleep, mulling over that question in my mind.

 

The following day, I rode in front, but allowed my horse to slow down every so often in order to bring me closer to Dari and Iolaus, not trying to be too obvious, but wanting to know just exactly what he was telling her.

"I remember that other Iolaus," came her voice from behind me, "the one from the nasty universe. When I first met him, he wasn't much of a fighter, but he had courage. The bards say he became a hero, even before he became a merman, because Hercules helped him. If a little wimp like that can do it, I can too."

As far as I could tell, Iolaus didn't turn a hair at the reference to his alter ego as a little wimp. He just said, "You may think this is strange, but Aphrodite taught that other Iolaus more about fighting than Hercules did."

"Really?" When she answered him, she sounded very suspicious. "How do you know?"

"Herc told me."

"Aphrodite? That silly Goddess?"

Iolaus laughed. "You'd better not let her hear you call her silly, my young friend. She can be pretty serious, in her own inimitable way."

"I don't care. I don't like her."

"Why not?"

"Because my mother always wants me to go to her temple and make an offering. She thinks I need help from Aphrodite. You know, in the romance department?"

"Plenty of time for that when you grow up."

"Nah, not me. I'm not interested."

"You will be, one of these days. Trust me."

Satisfied that they were at least not talking about martial matters, I kicked my horse into a slightly faster walk as Dari staunchly defended her stand against love to an amused Iolaus.

 

That night, it was Dari who sought me out, while Iolaus was off hunting us dinner again. She came over to where I was working on the fire, looking strangely hesitant and nervous.

"Uncle Euphonius, can I ask you something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"Were Xena and Gabrielle lovers?"

"I'm not really certain. Some bards say they were and some say they were just friends." I hit on an idea that would get me out of this possibly awkward situation. "Why don't you ask Iolaus? He knew them pretty well."

"I wasn't sure that was something I could ask him. I mean, I know about him and Xena and all." She looked up at me, meeting my eyes directly. "I also know about him and Hercules. And you."

"How --?"

"He told me. Oh, Uncle Euphonius, don't look so surprised. I've known about your preference for men for years. You know that. This isn't any different."

Gah! Now a child is more blasé about my sex life than I am!

"All right," I said slowly and calmly. Suddenly the little girl sitting next to me looked less like a child and more like a young woman. "If you want my opinion, and that's all it is, an opinion, then yes, Gabrielle and Xena were lovers."

She nodded in what appeared to be satisfaction, before saying very solemnly, "That's what I think also." Then her eyes turned tender and she touched my hand. "Thanks for being honest with me, Uncle Euphonius, and also for not treating me like a baby."

The fall of her light tunic in the firelight revealed the slight curves of a young girl's breasts. Funny how I had never noticed that before.

"You're certainly not a baby, my dear," I told her. "But you're not a grown woman yet either. Don't forget that."

"I won't," she promised. Then she kissed my cheek quickly and stood back, placing one hand on the hilt of the dagger at her waist. "But I'll get there soon, you know." With a short laugh, she ran off.

I shook my head, wondering what on earth had brought on that conversation. At any rate, it was an improvement over her usual subject. At least she was thinking of something else.

 

We arrived in Gargatha at mid-day. While I asked directions to Lucama's shop, Iolaus took the horses to the stables and went off to try to find his friends. Dari had wanted to go with him, but I made her stay with me instead, figuring she'd do better to learn a bit about buying merchandise than by hanging around Iolaus. She made a face, but obeyed without objection. Good. She was learning.

Besides, she had doubtless overheard me tell Iolaus to invite his buddies to a feast that night at the Victory, the best tavern in town, so she knew she'd get to meet them later.

 

I held the rubies up to the light and examined each one carefully. Two were fairly small, meant for earrings, while the other twelve were of a larger size, destined for Aphrodite's necklace. Although they all appeared to be of good quality, I shook my head and said to Lucama, "Well, I just don't know. They aren't quite the shade of pink that I had in mind." 

"Hey, what do you expect?" he objected, picking up one of the larger ones and waving it in my face. "Most rubies are deep red. I had to scour the earth for some that looked even a little bit pink. You should be glad I have any at all."

"All right, all right," I replied grudgingly. "How much do you want for these inferior gems?"

"Inferior?! You dare insult my merchandise?" He held the ruby up to the window. "Just look at the quality of the cut, the brilliance of the stone!" Clapping a hand on Dari's shoulder, he pulled her over to the proper angle to see the light coming through. "Here, girl, look at this. You just tell me if this isn't a lovely shade of pink."

She squinted her eyes and made a show of studying the stone from several angles. "Well, I guess it's pink enough. But it's supposed to be a gift to Aphrodite." She looked up at Lucama, all innocence. "Wouldn't she like more of a rose color?"

"The Goddess of Love?" the merchant replied, his thick eyebrows lifting upwards in surprise. "These are for her?"

Dari nodded, copying his wide-eyed expression, as if she herself was awed at the concept.

I had to stifle a grin at how well she was handling things.

"Well now," Lucama said, stroking his beard thoughtfully. "Since these rubies are meant for a Goddess, I might just have to give you a better deal."

When he quoted me a price, it was far more reasonable than I had expected. However, I couldn't let him know that.

"By Zeus' magnificent –-,"I started to swear, then stopped short, noticing Dari's presence and quickly changing the body part I had intended to mention, "Uh -- beard! Do you call that a proper price for these stones? You're insulting my intelligence, if you think I'll pay such an exorbitant amount." 

Of course, we went on from there, until we finally ended up with a price we could both agree on. It was mostly bluff and blunder, as is usually the way in business transactions. Nevertheless, I was entirely satisfied, especially since Dari's remarks had helped quite a bit. At last she had shown an aptitude for doing something useful. I even bought a nice ruby ring for myself, with the money I had saved on the other rubies.

As I counted out the dinars for Lucama, Dari asked softly, "Uncle Euphonius, may I go find Iolaus now?"

"All right. But don't forget about dinner at the tavern later on. And don't get in any trouble."

"Thanks, Uncle Euphonius! I'll behave," she said over her shoulder as she darted out the door.

Not too much later, the deal had been concluded and I had safely stowed the gems away with my things. I had strolled around the town, checking the place out, glancing into some of the shops and even making a few good buys here and there. Every so often, I happened to glance at my new ring, admiring it cheerfully. Like any good merchant, I love a bargain. And I do so much love shiny things.

It was just beginning to get dark as I headed for the Victory Tavern and the meal I was hosting for Iolaus and his friends. By now, I was having some serious misgivings about the wisdom of introducing Dari to what sounded like some pretty disreputable characters, but it was far too late to cancel the banquet. 

When I saw Dari coming up the street towards the tavern with Iolaus next to her, I was somewhat relieved, until a tall stranger holding a sword jumped out of an alley in front of them with a decidedly unfriendly shout.

Iolaus swung around, his sword rising to meet his opponent's. At the same time, he pushed Dari behind him, out of harm's way. The two men traded a few fierce blows, while I hurried forward, intent on getting Dari away from the fracas.

Iolaus tripped as he took a step backward, landing hard in the dirt. The stranger was on him immediately, the tip of his blade at my friend's throat.

I stopped abruptly, drawing out the throwing knife I keep in my boot. My arm was already back and in another heartbeat I'd have tossed the blade. Fortunately, I was now close enough to see them both clearly and to hear what they were saying.

The attacker had this funny sort of a smile on his face. His lips spread in a grimace so wide as to be almost a caricature of mirth, displaying clenched teeth. But the smile never reached his eyes, which stared with a kind of maniac glee, giving a definite impression of insanity.

Iolaus casually pushed aside the point of the sword. "Siann, don't smile like that, huh?"

"This smile is the last thing some people have seen," the madman replied calmly.

A shiver ran down my spine at the words, but the stranger broke the spell immediately by lowering the sword, pulling Iolaus to his feet, and hugging him tightly. As I watched the laughing and mutual back-pounding, I realized they had to be old friends, and the fierce swordplay had been play only.

Somewhat embarrassed at what I'd almost done, I slid my knife back into its accustomed hiding place and walked over to put a protective arm around Dari.

"You might have hurt the child with all that fooling around," I chided the two of them, eyeing the stranger coldly. He was taller than I am, which isn't saying a whole lot, and appeared to be about Iolaus' age. Short dark hair fell forward over a surprisingly delicate face. A somewhat stocky body, but not fat by any means. Not bad-looking, I decided, but nothing to cheer about.

The stranger favored me with a slight smile. He was clearly scrutinizing me also, as his eyes traveled up and down my torso, then landed on my face. "Don't be such a spoilsport," he said, in a voice far too high for his years. "We wouldn't have harmed the girl." Then he turned to Iolaus, draping one arm around his shoulders and clearly dismissing me from his thoughts. "C'mon, buddy. Let's go inside and have a drink. You did say you were holding a feast, didn't you?"

"Not me," Iolaus hastened to point out. "My friend Euphonius is paying."

"Just as long as it's free, I don't care. C'mon."

Iolaus didn't budge. "Siann, I think I'd better introduce you to our host." He glanced significantly at me. "Euphonius, I'd like you to meet Siann. She and I fought together in the war." 

I did a mental double take. She? By the Gods, this is a woman! I kept a totally neutral expression on my face, not wanting her to realize I had ever thought otherwise. If this was one of Iolaus' so-called friends, I was not impressed. Quite the opposite, in fact.

"Glad to meet you, Euphronius," Siann said, seeming not the least bit embarrassed by her faux pas.

"Euphonius, not Euphronius," I corrected automatically. I hate it when people mess up my name, since it means pleasing to the ear.

"Oh, sorry." She tried again, with almost sarcastic precision, "Eu-phon-I-us. What kind of a dumb name is that, anyway?" 

Have you ever met someone and taken an immediate dislike to them, whether or not later events proved you to be correct? If you have, then you'll know how I reacted to Siann. 

"My name literally means pleasing to the ears. My parents thought it sounded nice," I replied frostily. I wasn't sure if she even got the pun, but that's my standard answer to a question about my name.

"Let's go inside," Iolaus suggested, seeing us staring at each other in a less than friendly manner.

 

Once inside the Victory Tavern, I made sure that Dari was safely seated between Iolaus and me, still having serious doubts about the wisdom of hosting this little dinner party. If all of Iolaus' buddies were as uncouth as Siann, perhaps I shouldn't even have brought the child into this situation. But it was too late now. She clearly loved every minute of it, staring around wide-eyed at all of her "heroes".

Heroes indeed! I reflected, glancing around the crowded tavern. This ragtag bunch of scruffy, aging ex-soldiers didn't impress me in the least. However, I had no choice but to smile and act the part of the gracious host as Iolaus introduced a succession of his friends. There was much exuberant greeting and backslapping going on. One huge man caught Iolaus up in a fierce bear hug, actually lifting him clear off the floor. This was an even more remarkable feat when you considered that the man had only one arm. His other sleeve was folded up and pinned at the shoulder. Not only that, but he walked with a distinct limp.

Somewhat sheepishly, Iolaus introduced the one-armed giant as Vachon.

Once Dari had eaten her fill, she ran off and left me to sit and drink with the others. I saw her moving about the room, fetching food and ale for the various war heroes and listening raptly to their words. This wasn't working well at all. No, indeed. I should never have brought her here.

Siann had seated herself across the table from me. Woman she might be, but I noticed sourly that she had a man's appetite. She polished off the ale like a man also. Five empty tankards stood neatly in a line before her, and she was working diligently on draining the sixth.

"Hey, Euphorbia," she finally said, seeing me watching her. "How'd you get to be friends with Iolaus anyway?"

"Euphonius," I corrected sourly. The faintly mocking smile on her face told me clearly enough that she had deliberately screwed up my name, but I chose to pretend otherwise. "Euphorbia is a tropical plant."

"Oh, is it really?" she remarked innocently.

"Yes. And in answer to your question, I met Iolaus a number of years ago, when he came to my village to visit his mother."

Getting up from her place, she came around the table and sat down next to me. One arm draped around my shoulders, she played with a bit of my hair as she said, "So, Eponymous, you're kinda cute, I think. Whaddya say we get to know each other a little better?"

Surprised, I wasn't entirely sure if she was actually making a pass at me, or simply making fun of me.

"Siann --" Iolaus began warningly.

I waved him to silence, replying disdainfully, "Eponymous means an adjective relating to the person for whom something is named." I slipped out from under her arm. "And I think I know you well enough already."

"Oh, that's right. Your kind doesn't fancy women, do they?" She shrugged elaborately, then ran her fingers down the front of my tunic in what could have been a seductive gesture. "Too bad. Judging by the fancy clothes and that shiny red ring, you're pretty rich."

"Not by a long shot," I retorted, brushing away her hand. "Well-off, maybe. But I work hard for my dinars."

"Oh, I'll just bet you do, Sweetie." 

Everyone within hearing distance laughed at the interchange, but I was getting madder by the minute. I found "Sweetie" even more obnoxious than the ways she had purposely mispronounced my name.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you it's not polite to insult the person who's paying for your food and drink?" I replied icily.

"Insult you? I try to pick you up and you get all huffy about it? Ha, Euphorius, old boy, get a life!"

Damn her, she'd done it again! "Euphonius," I corrected patiently, as if to the village idiot. I was not going to let her know that she had gotten my goat.  
She just laughed and reached out toward me again. 

Iolaus caught her hand. "Siann, enough already. Leave him alone."

Their eyes met, and I saw the flash of something beyond just friendship. Unwanted jealousy flared in my heart. Siann and Iolaus? No, surely not!

But she backed off, whether in response to his words or just because she had had enough of teasing me, I didn't know. "Okay, buddy, okay," she told him lightly. "Eucalyptus here is just such fun to tease, that's all." 

As I bit my tongue so as not to respond to yet another deliberate insult to my name, Siann returned to her original place across the table, blew me an elaborate kiss, then flagged down the serving wench for another tankard of ale.

At least I was rid of her harassment for the present. My anger began to subside. As I took a few slow swallows of my own ale, I caught a bit of conversation from a couple of men sitting not far away, easily recognizing the speaker as the big man who had lifted Iolaus off his feet earlier on.

"Trojan War. Humph!" he was saying. "A waste of life. All those men dead, and for what? Because one king's wife ran off with another king. Never should have fought a war over that."

After all these years, they were still re-hashing the politics of the war? I stifled a yawn. How dreadfully boring! Iolaus didn't seem to be saying much. I had expected that he'd be more garrulous in the company of his old friends. Now that I thought about it, he had been rather guarded and withdrawn during the entire meal. Definitely not like him.

"Vachon, we were just soldiers," another man objected loudly, drawing my attention back to the discussion. "That wasn't up to us to decide."

"Then who is it up to, Myka? We fought, we died, and what happened? We came home, and no one wanted us around. They all just wanted to forget it ever happened." He held up his empty sleeve. "Well, how about me? Am I supposed to just forget this? By the Gods, I wish I could!" With his good arm, he pounded a fist down on the table. "Remember what Ajax said about the ones who didn't have the guts to fight beside us, but now had the nerve to spit on us? Well, he was right! Even here, the damn civilians in this town would be happy if we'd all just die of old age."

"That's not true," the other man objected. Myka had medium-dark skin, and long hair knotted behind his neck. He was tall, and impressive. I had the feeling that he had been extremely handsome in his youth, since he was still very attractive now. He looked maybe 35 years old, so he must have been quite young when he had fought at Troy. "The townspeople know that it's only fear of us that keeps Tellis' pirate gang away."

Pirates? Had I heard him mention pirates? And in the present tense? Alarmed, I kept a sharper ear on the conversation.

"Yeah, well," Vachon replied. "But I still remember how the Corinthians told us we'd been fighting for so long that we were nothing but a bunch of thugs, and that we couldn't leave the fighting behind."

Siann stopped her steady drinking to join in the dispute. "Well, isn't that true, to some extent? We're not civilians, and we don't think like civilians." She grinned. "After all, who'd want to think like them? Bunch of cowards and wimps!"

I thought I caught her looking at me out of the corners of her eyes as she said that. But I kept silent, telling myself I had too much dignity to respond to the insult of a drunken ruffian.

When Vachon griped again about the attitude of some of the folks of Gargatha, the talk turned toward the past, and the way the townspeople had once given them respect and honor for keeping pirates and bandits away. Eventually, they likened the present situation to what had happened in Corinth some years ago, when King Iphicles had given them trouble, throwing some of them into the prison of Golgoth. I knew the basics of the story, of course, so I found it pretty dull. I was listening for more mention of pirates. Hearing nothing, I finally grew impatient. I leaned over towards Iolaus and asked him in a low voice, "You know anything about Tellis the pirate?"

Unfortunately, I hadn't spoken softly enough, since Siann took it upon herself to answer my question.

"You're interested in Tellis, eh? Yeah, he's a pirate all right, and a nasty one. You'd better hope he doesn't decide to attack us while you're here, Euph. I don't think you'd like that at all."

I winced at being called by a shortened form of my name, but didn't bother to object. I was far too concerned about what she'd said. I turned once more to Iolaus. "You didn't tell me about this when you recommended we come here."

"How could I? I didn't know about it. I thought it was all in the past." He shifted his glance away from me, as if he really wasn't too happy about the situation. I'd have bet that his friends had told him already, but he had kept quiet, not wanting to worry me over something that was, after all, only an unlikely possibility.

"Don't worry," Myka said, scowling at Siann. "Nothing's going to happen. Tellis has enough sense to keep away from Gargatha. There are more than enough other towns for him to raid."

"Not too many as prosperous as we are, though," Siann put in, with a leering wink at me. "But don't worry, pal. Me and my buddies will protect you."

"Thank you," I told her coldly, before I addressed the others heartily, and possibly slightly sarcastically. "With such an illustrious gathering of heroes and warriors, I'm sure I have nothing to fear."

A laughing chorus of assurances greeted my remark. Vachon raised his ale and proposed a toast to their host, which I graciously accepted. 

Although the grin on Siann's face was less than respectful, she joined in with the cheers, then drained her tankard and waved for another one. And yet, she truly didn't act drunk. The annoying woman seemed able to down an incredible amount of alcohol without showing any obvious effects. Had I drunk that much ale, I'd have been passed out under the table.

Iolaus surprised me by reaching across to touch Siann's hand and saying, "Don't you think you've had enough?"

"I can never have enough," was the cold sober and very bitter reply.

"Why do you do it?" He waved at the empty tankards lined up neatly in front of her.

She shrugged and added one more to the lineup. "It's the only thing that keeps the nightmares away."

"I fought in the same war you did, and I don't have nightmares." He hesitated. "Well, not very often, anyway."

She fixed her eyes on his. "No two people ever fight the same war, Iolaus. You should know that. What I did, what you did, what Myka did, isn't the same at all."

"But --"

"There are no buts. You're free to come to terms with it however you can, pal, but let me do the same." She took more ale from the serving wench's tray and lifted it high. "This is what works for me."

Iolaus persisted. "Ajax once said that a good soldier never surrenders, but he always recognizes the enemy when he sees him, and sometimes, that enemy is within." He eyed the ale significantly. 

Siann didn't like that insinuation at all. "Give it a rest, buddy. I'm warning you." Then her tone changed, as she looked closer at the sincere concern in Iolaus' eyes, where she might have expected to see blame. She smiled a bit, to erase her threat. "No, sorry. But I am asking you. Leave it alone."

He gave up the argument. Siann drained the entire tankard, then got to her feet and walked out the back door of the tavern, almost certainly to visit the outhouse after all that ale.

As I frowned at her departing back, Iolaus asked me softly, "You don't like her, do you?"

I laughed. "Now, whatever gave you that idea?" 

"Siann's not bad, when you get to know her," he hazarded.

"That's what you say. To me, she's a rude, obnoxious bitch, and I want nothing more to do with her."

"If you knew what happened to her in the war, you might be more understanding."

I was having none of it. "Hmph! She's not the only one who can cry about her war wounds. Look at Vachon over there. He's not nasty, and he looks to have been hurt far more badly than Siann was."

"Euphonius, you really don't know what you're talking about."

"Why not?"

He dropped his voice even lower. "It isn't what was done to her that bothers Siann. What haunts her is what she did to others."

Well, that did throw a bit of a different light on her behavior, but it still wasn't a very bright light. "What did she do?" I asked, more out of curiosity than true caring.

Iolaus looked distinctly uncomfortable. "She never talks about it. Only a few of us know, and I don't think I have the right to say anything more than I have already."

"All right, granted that Siann did some horrible stuff. It was a war, and that happens. Other people learn to forget about it and move on. Why can't she?"

"Maybe -- because she cares too much," he replied unhappily.

That didn't make a lot of sense to me, so I changed the subject. When Siann returned, she spent the rest of the evening avoiding me, much to my relief.

By the time the feasting and drinking were over, Dari was curled up alongside me on the bench, asleep with her head in Iolaus' lap. He had to carry her up to our rooms. 

 

When I awoke next morning, Dari wasn't lying beside me on the bed the way she was supposed to be. However, it being fairly late, I assumed she had gotten up earlier and gone off somewhere.

Despite a fine breakfast at the inn, I was not in the best of moods and a bad headache from last night's drinking was doing absolutely nothing to help the situation. I ventured outside, wincing as the bright sunlight assaulted my poor eyes. I figured Dari had gone to the big field on the far edge of town that I had noticed as we rode in being used as a practice ground by our illustrious band of warriors. I dragged my unwilling feet in that direction, trudging past the shops and homes and up the rise.

Yep, there they were, people exercising in groups or alone, or whacking at each other with staves or swords. I thought I saw Dari's small figure in the crowd that was watching Siann beat the shit out of her hapless opponent with a heavy staff. The noise of the wood cracking together reverberated through the relentless pounding in my head. I took a deep breath, willing the pain to ease off before I had to go stop the girl from making a nuisance of herself.

Iolaus sat leaning against a tree, munching on some brown bread and sipping now and then from a bottle he held in his left hand. I walked over and plopped down alongside him. From his half-hearted smile, I guessed that his head wasn't doing too much better this morning than mine was. He broke off a chunk of bread and held it out to me.

"No, thanks. I ate already." 

He offered the bottle instead. "Here, try a bit of this then. You look pretty green around the gills."

"What is it? About the last thing I need is more alcohol."

"It's a herbal potion Siann mixed up for me. Cures hangovers, but it does take a little time to act, so be patient."

Without too much hope of a miracle cure, I took a swig from the bottle, then made a face. "Tastes awful."

"That's not the point. It works. Trust me."

"Iolaus, my dear man, considering all we've been through together, how could I possibly not trust you?" Perhaps the potion truly was working, since my thoughts had shifted from my own misery to the pleasure of being here with him.

"That's the spirit. Lean back and enjoy the fresh morning air."

"Umm." The fresh air wasn't what I was enjoying. Sitting here with him, now that I could enjoy. In fact, I had to be careful not to let myself enjoy it too much or risk embarrassing myself. Then the clash of wood on wood brought me back to the present situation with Dari.

"Well, your idea didn't work very well, did it?" I began.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that Dari hasn't decided not to be a warrior, despite seeing all these people. Just look at her." I waved my hand in their direction. "She's over there staring at Siann."

Iolaus glanced in the direction I had indicated. "There's something wrong with that?" he remarked at last.

"You know full well that there is!" I said, more sharply than I had intended. "This isn't the lesson she was supposed to learn!"

"Ever consider that we may have been trying to teach her the wrong lesson?" he said diffidently.

I sat up straighter, all thought of relaxation gone. "What are you talking about?"

"You're not gonna like this, but there's always the chance that she does have what it takes to be a warrior."

"Rubbish! She's a child."

"And how old do you think I was when I started training?"

I fell back on my last line of defense. "She's a girl."

"Say that one more time, my friend, and I'll hit you upside the head," he said with a grin. "Besides, Xena was a girl."

"Now you're starting to sound like Dari!" I exclaimed in exasperation.

"Euphonius --"

"No, no, no! Absolutely not! I won't let my little girl grow up like that."

"She's not your little girl," he replied gently. "She's Ysabel's daughter. In fact, in a few more years, she won't even be a child anymore. She'll be a woman, and she'll be making her own decisions."

"She's the closest thing to a daughter that I'll ever have." No sooner were the words out of my mouth than I realized they were true. I had always been distantly fond of the child, but these last few days in her company had brought us closer together, despite our clash of opinions. "I don't want her to get hurt, that's all," I concluded lamely.

"I know. But you can't choose her life for her. She's the only one who's entitled to do that."

I sighed wearily and closed my eyes, knowing I was getting the worst of this discussion. "So what do you suggest?"

"Ever hear of Cheiron's Academy?"

"Cheiron the Centaur?"

"Yeah, but he's dead. Jason runs it now."

"So I've heard. But that's not a proper school. It's a training ground for mercenaries."

"Well, not exactly. Herc and I went there when we were young, you know."

"No," I replied absolutely, already sure I knew where the conversation was leading. "That's not for Dari."

"But --"

"I said no!" 

Furious, I got to my feet and stomped off, but I didn't get far before I had to glance back over my shoulder to see what effect, if any, my leaving had had on Iolaus. All he did was take another swig of his herbal hangover remedy.

Shit! I wanted him so badly, but sometimes I just hated his guts. And maybe the second feeling was nothing more than a reaction to the first. Euphonius, you monumental asshole! 

Well, at least we'd be leaving Gargatha tomorrow. If things were no better with Dari than they'd been before, they were also no worse. And besides, my headache actually was beginning to subside, just as Iolaus had promised it would.

I strode around the practice field for a while, letting my anger fade away along with the pain in my head. When I had calmed down a bit, I went to gather up Dari, intending to take her with me as I went in search of good buys in the marketplace. She had done so well with Lucama that I was anxious to teach her more of the fine points of bargaining, and maybe a bit about judging the quality of gemstones.

I wasn't pleased to find her engaged in a serious conversation with Siann. As I drew closer, I could hear what they were saying and my displeasure increased dramatically.

"Please, Siann! Teach me how to fight," Dari pleaded.

"You're just a baby, child. Go home. Find yourself a different life."

"No, I want to be a warrior. Like you."

Siann shook her head. "You're too young to know what you want."

"I'm not. I can do it. I know I can."

By that time, I had gotten up next to them. "Take the lady's advice, Dari. She knows what she's talking about."

I had come up behind Siann's back, so she turned when she heard my voice and gave me a look. I took Dari's hand. "Come on with me and we'll go to the marketplace."

"No, I want to stay here." She pulled away from me.

I'm not too proud to stoop to a little bribery now and then. "Come with me and I'll buy you something nice."

"Will you buy me a staff?" Dari asked hopefully.

"Certainly not! I had in mind something nicer, like a ring or a necklace."

"Then I want to stay here."

Siann laughed. "Looks like you can't buy her off so easily, little merchant." Putting one hand on Dari's shoulder, she went on, "All right, girl, if you're so determined, I'll show you a few moves."

I got the distinct impression that the obnoxious woman had only offered to do it in order to spite me. 

"Very well," I replied shortly. Then I turned and stalked off by myself to the marketplace, muttering angry curses under my breath. This whole thing just wasn't working out as planned.

 

"Please, Uncle Euphonius! Just a few more days. Please?" Dari wheedled, as we sat eating a late dinner at the inn that evening.

"No. It's time we headed home. We've been here long enough."

"But I'm learning so much. I don't want to go yet. Just two more days?"

I glanced at Iolaus, hoping for some backup. He shrugged. "I wouldn't mind staying a little longer. There's plenty of time before I'm supposed to meet Herc."

"What about those pirates everyone was talking about?" I objected. "We don't want to be here if they decide to attack the town."

He just shrugged. "Tellis has more sense than that. The town's waterfront is pretty well fortified against attack. We're perfectly safe."

I threw up my hands in surrender, but the truth was I really didn't mind staying, even if it meant that Dari got to play warrior for a little longer. It also meant I could spend just that much more time in Iolaus' company. 

 

Next day, as I once again walked through the village that had been named for a prison, I wandered curiously away from the main thoroughfare and through the back streets. I saw a man without both legs, dragging himself around on a little wheeled platform. A woman passed me in the street, half her face twisted and destroyed by a burn scar. From a dismal little hut with a barred door, I heard someone screaming in the unmistakably accents of insanity. Outside the town, I stumbled upon an old graveyard and read the memorial stones, set up to honor comrades long dead. There were a lot of them, and the dates were from the time period of the Trojan War.

Looking at the names on the stones, and the occasional statue or face carved into the marker, I got a very clear feeling that I was walking through a country I could never understand in anything except an intellectual way. I had not been a part of the War. I had in fact never been a soldier of any kind. Oh yes, I had had a few adventures in my life and the face of death wasn't entirely unfamiliar to me. But I had never seen killing on a large scale, and never had to contemplate the blood on my own hands, only to wonder if it had been justified or not. Despite my expertise with a throwing knife and a certain amount of skill with a rapier, I had never been trained to use the weapons of a professional soldier.

I had never seen the face of my enemy up close, and realized, just before I killed him, that he was only a man like me. 

I had never laid my sword on Ares' altar and prayed for success in battle. 

I had never had to.

All these things, and more, had simply never been a part of my life. Perhaps I had been lucky in this regard. But it also made me a perpetual outsider in that world I now saw around me, reflected in the eyes of the men and women who had once stood before the walls of Troy and experienced, for ten long and endless years, the death and destruction of an ultimately useless war.

The only thing I could do was attempt to imagine it, while for them it lived on in their memories, and in their nightmares. I knew that now, from the conversations I had heard since I'd been in town. 

Peace can be very slow in coming, even after the battles are long over.

So all right, maybe these men and women deserved more sympathy and understanding than I had been willing to give them. Maybe they even deserved a bit of respect for what they had been through. But it was still nothing for a young girl to aspire to be, was it?

 

I was still thinking these melancholy and sobering thoughts when I passed the practice field and saw Dari out there sparring with Siann, with several other people gathered around to watch. I sighed and shook my head, and would have continued on towards the inn except that I saw Iolaus with the watchers. Just as I joined the group, Dari took a wild swing and missed her target completely, only to have her opponent whack her smartly across the back with her staff. Dari stumbled forward and fell face down on the ground from the force of the blow she had taken.

That was too much for me. Stepping in front of the fallen girl, I faced Siann and ordered angrily, "Stop it! You'll hurt the child."

Siann looked daggers at me. For a moment, I thought she was going to hit me with her staff also, but then she set one end down on the ground and leaned on it. "Don't worry, I won't do your precious little niece any real harm," she said with a slight sneer. "But I might hurt her a little, now and then."

"Well, that makes me feel just a whole lot better," I retorted sarcastically, holding my ground.

"You don't understand," Iolaus broke in, coming over to me. "Getting hurt is part of what happens. If Dari can't deal with that, she'll back out right now. If she can, then she'll learn what to expect."

"But --"

"I know, I know: she's just a little girl, right?"

"Right!"

Grabbing my arm, he turned me around to face Dari. "Look closer, buddy. Do you see a little girl?"

I looked. With blood oozing from her nose, she had stood up, retrieved her staff, and was once more in an on-guard stance, determined to continue the uneven fight.

"No, I do not see a little girl," I admitted unhappily to Iolaus as I wilted. "I see a warrior in training, and that doesn't please me at all."

While Dari smiled grimly, Siann raised her staff once more. With a glance at me, she asked scornfully, "What's the matter, Sweetie? Are you threatened by the idea of your little niece becoming more of a man than you are?"

I took a deep breath, stood as tall as I could, and tried to ignore her calling me "Sweetie" as I replied tightly, "You don't have to be a warrior to be a man."

"No?" She lifted one eyebrow. "Is that how you truly feel, or do you just have to say that to save your pride?"

I fixed her with a level look. "I'm not trying to protect my pride. I don't have to. I know who and what I am, and I'm not ashamed of it. Can you say the same?"

I had expected to nail her with that last comment, but I hadn't expected to succeed quite so well. A wildfire ignited behind her eyes and her lips twisted into that sick smile as she tossed her staff away. I never even saw her fist until it connected with my gut. As I doubled over, struggling to breathe, she hit me again in the jaw, rocking my head back and sending me sprawling on the ground.

As I tried to pull my wits together, I heard her shouting at me. "You despicable coward! How dare you say that to me?! Let me go! I'll kill that little misbegotten son of a sea whore!"

(So all right, maybe her actual words were a lot more descriptive than that, but I'm giving you the gist of what she said as politely as I can.)

As I finally managed to suck in some air, I saw that Iolaus was holding her back, along with two or three of the others. Dari knelt next to me, pleading for some assurance that I was okay. I took her hand and gave it a squeeze, which was about all I could manage at the time.

I glared at the furious bitch as Dari helped me sit up. Siann continued raving about what a wretch I was, while I continued trying to breathe. As soon as I could, I said in between gasps, "Oh sure, beat the shit out of me. That really shows how big and brave you are, doesn't it?" I was playing to Dari now. "Show everyone just what a brute and ruffian you truly are. Rage and violence. That's typical of your type, isn't it?"

Siann stopped struggling and went abruptly white in the face. When they let her go, she turned her back.

That freed Iolaus to rush over to me. "You okay?"

"I -- think so."

His fingers probed my midsection, looking for broken ribs. Then he turned my face up to him and gently explored the growing bruise on the right side of my chin, running his fingers along my jaw. "I don't think anything is broken," he concluded.

"No thanks to Siann, if it's not."

His eyes slid sideways for a moment in Siann's direction. "If she had wanted to kill you, buddy, you'd be dead," he said softly. "Do you think you can stand up? I'd like to get you back to your room so I can put a cold compress on your jaw before it swells up."

"Sure. I can stand. Just give me a hand."

He did. No sooner had I gotten to my feet than the world started turning black around the edges and I got that ringing in my ears that meant I was going to faint. My knees sagged, but I found myself gathered up into strong arms and held like a baby. Somewhere in the distance, a voice said, "It's okay, I'll carry him."

As my head cleared a little, I realized with dismay that it was Siann who held me. I would have protested, but I felt too dizzy. 

I heard Iolaus say, "Dari, go and practice with Vachon for a while, okay?"

"But Vachon only has one arm," Dari replied uncertainly. "What can he do?"

"More than most of us can do with both arms. Go on now and do as I say." 

The girl looked to me for confirmation. I could do little more than nod. 

Reluctantly, she obeyed.

"Come on," Siann said. "Let's get him back to the tavern."

 

Jogged around as I was, the trip seemed to take forever, but I was at last in my room, mercifully at peace and lying on the bed. Siann had taken out a small leather pouch and was sorting through it, as Iolaus held a cold cloth against my jaw.

When Siann approached the bed, I frowned and drew back. "No. Go away. You've done enough damage."

"Euphonius, she's trying to help."

"Don't care. Make her go away."

"I won't hurt you," Siann replied, with uncharacteristic tenderness. "If you put these leaves under your tongue, you'll feel better."

I glared at her suspiciously.

"I know what I'm doing." She looked away. "I'm sorry I hurt you. I over-reacted."

Still wary, I nodded and opened my mouth, wincing at the pain that shot through the side of my face. The leaves tasted terrible, but after a little while I really did start to feel better.

Siann disappeared briefly, then came back in the door with a cup in one hand and a bulging wineskin in the other. She held out the cup in my direction. "Here. It's nice cold water, laced with a bit of wine. It'll restore your spirits."

"My spirits were just fine, until you attacked me." I grabbed the cup and sipped a little. I was starting to feel like my old self again, but I was still pretty angry.

"Look, I said I was sorry."

I took another sip. "Sorry? And you think that makes it all well? Life doesn't work that way, lady."

I'd have sworn she winced at that. In fact, as I looked over the edge of the cup at her face, I saw a dreadfully bleak expression come into her eyes.

"I know," she said softly, turning away.

Iolaus glanced at me and shook his head briefly. Then he surprised me by going over to the woman and putting his arms around her, drawing her into a comradely hug. She overtopped him by a head, which seemed rather amusing to me at the time. 

"It's all right, Siann," I heard him murmur. "It's just that he doesn't understand, that's all."

Surprised, I thought I saw the glitter of a tear in her eye as she allowed herself to lean against him and rest her cheek on his shining hair. I was beginning to feel guilty about harassing her, until I saw her bend down a little and kiss him full on the lips. 

When the kiss went on far longer than it decently should have, I decided I was not feeling quite as guilty as I had before. Once again, I wondered if they had ever screwed around together. 

I debated the merits of just ignoring them as opposed to interrupting them. Interrupting won, hands down.

I cleared my throat loudly. "All right, you two. Enough of that."

Despite my pleasure at making them break off the clinch, I saw a dangerous gleam in Siann's eye.

"You mean you don't like to watch?" she asked archly.

"Not particularly." This whole thing was making me distinctly uncomfortable.

Still looking at me, she slid a hand under Iolaus' vest and ran her fingers mockingly down his bare chest to his belt buckle. "I think you'd just love to watch us. In fact, I think you'd love to do just about anything that involves my pretty blond buddy here, wouldn't you?"

She had read my feelings all too well. "Him, yes," I retorted. "You, no."

"Sure you won't change your mind about that, Sweetie?" Her hand strayed lower, reaching for the leather of his codpiece.

Iolaus had finally had enough. He grabbed her hand and moved it firmly away. Or at least that's what I think he was trying to do. Siann let him move her hand all right, but she kept ahold of his hand and pressed it squarely onto one of her breasts. I saw his eyes widen and he drew in his breath.

"Siann –-" he started to protest. 

With a wicked smile at me, she stopped his protest by kissing him again.

When Iolaus finally broke loose and came up for air, I was burning with anger. Or was it jealousy? Or, then again, maybe it was just lust? There was virtually nothing Iolaus could do in the way of sex that wouldn't turn me on, Siann notwithstanding.

"Wanna put this bed to better use than nursing a barely-injured man?" she asked him mockingly.

Damn the woman! She was watching me over his shoulder and grinning!

Iolaus pushed her away and held her at arm's length. "Cut it out. This isn't funny."

"Maybe it's not supposed to be funny," she replied. "Maybe it's supposed to be an invitation." She flashed me an even more wicked grin. "How about it, Sweetie? Maybe you'd like to lie there and watch us? Or maybe you're up for a little action yourself?"

By now I was indeed up for something, despite my bruised ribs and aching jaw, but I had no clue as to how to interpret her words. A mocking challenge, or a genuine offer? I decided to play into it. "Watching or acting, either one is fine with me," I replied, matching her arch tone.

The woman laughed, but Iolaus just shook his head. "Siann, do you mean this for real? Or are you just playing games?"

"Darling boy, have I ever passed up a chance to make love to you?" she answered sweetly.

"Well, no, but --"

Once again, she turned to me. "I'll leave it up to our rich little friend then. What do you say, Sweetie? Are we serious?"

"Oh yeah." I was more than willing to admit to my desire for Iolaus, but I tried to keep it at that level. No way did I want this vicious bitch to realize just how much he really meant to me. If she did, I knew full well she'd find a way to turn my feelings into a mockery.

Iolaus, on the other hand, knew how much I cared for him. I just prayed he wouldn't let her know, if anything came of this outrageous flirting. It was almost with relief that I heard him say, "Siann, I'm really not in the mood for all this right now."

"No?" Boldly, she placed her hand on his codpiece again. A startled look came over her face and she removed her hand. "You aren't kidding, are you?"

"No. I'm not."

"What's wrong?"

"I don't know."

"Yes, you do. What is it?"

"These last few days, being here, remembering so many things . . ." He let his voice trail off. "I just haven't felt very –-" He grinned a little. "—amorous."

Siann glanced over at me, almost conspiratorially. Then she sat down on the side of the bed. "I rather think we could fix that if we tried, don't you?"

Not sure what she was up to, I replied, "Uh -– perhaps."

"No perhaps about it, Sweetie."

I didn't bother to react to the name this time. I had more important things to think about. Was she actually trying to maneuver us all into bed together, or was I imagining things?

"What if we bury our differences and work together on this? How about it? Want to kiss and make up?"

"I'd sooner kiss a raw fish," I growled.

She looked at me disgustedly. "Ha! You think I want to get it on with you? You probably don't even know where to put it, with a real woman."

I couldn't let her get away with that. "You'd be surprised what I know about women," I replied haughtily.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really!"

"I suppose you think you could get me off? Come on now." 

I gave her a narrow-eyed glare. "If I wanted to, I'll bet I could. But if you think I want to, you've got another think coming."

She drew herself up and sneered. "The man doesn't live that I can't handle, and make him like it, too."

The tension between us fairly sparkled, as we faced off against each other. Siann glared at me, and I glared right back at her and growled, "Oh, you think so, do you?"

Iolaus laughed. "You know, you two are actually rather funny," he said.

We both deflated visibly at this comment. Siann was at a loss for words, but I managed to say, "Funny?!"

"Yep." He sat down on the bed. "Okay, since you both seem to be determined to make this into a contest, how about we set up some rules, huh?"

As we continued to stare at him, he explained further. "Euphonius, you don't like Siann very much and you don't usually screw women. Right?"

I nodded my head.

"And Siann, you enjoy teasing Euphonius, and don't particularly like him either. Yes?"

She nodded. 

"But you both think you're pretty good in bed?"

He looked at us. We both nodded vigorously, not to be outdone by the other.

"Okay then," he concluded, "you each get a chance to make the other come. Whoever is successful gets the prize."

"What's the prize?" I asked, almost sure I knew the answer.

He grinned. "Me."

By now, I had pretty much forgotten my bruises. This could just possibly turn into something good. However, remembering Iolaus' earlier reluctance, I asked, "You sure you want to do this?"

"Yeah, I think so." He shrugged and his grin turned rather sheepish. "Maybe I'm not quite so –- disinterested as I thought I was."

"I'm game if you are, then."

"Who goes first?" Siann asked warily.

"Flip a dinar?" Iolaus suggested.

We did. I won the toss. I wasn't sure if that was good or bad.

"Okay now, play fair," Iolaus admonished, moving over to perch cross-legged at the head of the bed. "And may the best man and/or woman win."

I heaved an exaggerated sigh and moved closer to Siann. "All right. Let's get this over with."

All she gave me in reply was a disdainful snort, as she crossed her legs and folded her arms across her chest. I could tell this was going to be a challenge of the first order, but if this was what I had to do in order to have sex with Iolaus, then so be it.

Deliberately keeping my body from touching hers in any way, I knelt behind her on the bed and began to gently massage her neck and shoulders. Now and then, I allowed a finger to stray toward her ear, or up into her hair, or around to the side of her face, always gentle and teasing. The woman had muscles that would make a man proud, but by the time I was finished, those muscles had lost a good bit of their tension. My hands grew bolder, moving further down her back and around to the front of her body, but only to her taut abdomen and never underneath her clothes. Softly, my lips brushed her neck. I cautiously nibbled an earlobe, checking to see if I could do so without hurting my bruised jaw. Yep. No problem there. Guess I wasn't hurt all that badly after all. I went on to kiss her cheek and the edge of her eyelid. I never kissed her full on the mouth, but I covered just about everything I could reach from my position behind her on the bed.

It was all coming back to me now. All the little tricks and touches I had learned long ago in my youth, during the time I had spent with the Widow Twanky. All the many things she had taught me about making love to a woman, and the ways to read a woman's desire. There was nothing hard about any of this, nothing any man couldn't do, if he was willing to be patient and ignore the urgings of his cock. In my case, there were no urgings to ignore, which worked entirely to my benefit.

I could tell I was achieving the desired results when she sighed and let her head fall forward, allowing me better access to her neck. That was when I allowed my hand to touch her breasts, moving from one to the other, holding, squeezing, rubbing the stiffening nipples through the rough fabric of her tunic, as she began to make little squirming motions, pushing her chest into my stroking hand.

Smiling secretly to myself, I simultaneously drew Siann back down onto the bed and deftly untied the drawstring on her trousers. She made no protest as I stripped her of her pants, leaving her tunic to cover most of her body, but exposing her crotch. I slid down to the floor, kneeling beside her legs, which still hung over the edge of the bed. At first, she kept her legs crossed, still trying to squelch her desire, but after my talented mouth had licked and sucked her thighs for a time, and my seeking fingers had probed as far as they could into her groin, she opened herself to me, eyes closed, head thrown back, lost in her own sensations.

I moved between her outspread legs, parting the folds of heated flesh and licking at her eager clitoris with light, teasing flicks of my tongue. As she thrust herself up into my face, I got more fully into it, sucking and licking more strongly, but still carefully. An occasional twinge of pain shot along the side of my face from my jaw, but I ignored it, too intent on winning the contest.

Oh yes, I know how to do this. I've always found it distasteful, but so are a lot of other things in life. Telling myself sternly that sometimes one must do what one doesn't particularly like to do, I bent all my efforts to bringing Siann to a climax, using my hands on her straining breasts as skillfully as I was plying my tongue on her nether regions.

It didn't take very long to produce the desired effect. She moaned, gasped, squirmed, and cursed at me, but she came, and she came hard.

I sat up, grinning at Iolaus. There was a hair wrapped around my tongue and I considered spitting, but decided that would be just too rude. Instead, I discreetly removed it by wiping my sleeve across my mouth.

Iolaus, meanwhile, kept a solemn and serious look on his face as he held up a finger and announced, "Score one for Euphonius. Your turn, Siann."

She was still catching her breath, but she gave me that mocking false smile and said, "I never thought you had it in you, Sweetie."

I fixed her with a smug glare as I got up off my knees. "Never assume that a man is incapable of doing something, just because he usually chooses not to do it." 

Her hand snaked out to my crotch, where she couldn't help but notice my limp cock. She shook her head. "Not even turned on, huh? Well, we'll have to do something about that."

Now it was my turn to cross my arms. I was pretty damn confident that no woman alive could make me hard, if I didn't want it to happen. "Go ahead. If you think you can."

But instead of trying to caress my sagging manhood into stiffness, she gave me a crafty look and moved up alongside Iolaus, who now sat tailor-style on top of the pillows at the head of the bed. She took hold of his vest and began sliding it slowly down off his shoulders.

"Hey!" I protested. "No fair! You're not allowed to touch him unless you win the contest."

"Look closer, Sweetie. I'm not touching him. I'm touching his clothes."

I glanced indignantly to Iolaus to render a verdict. He smiled and shrugged. Okay, so it was legal.

With a triumphant grin, Siann went on to remove his boots, at the same time tugging him down onto the bed so he was lying beside her. Very careful not to actually touch his skin, she unhooked his belt and began working his leather pants down over his hips.

I closed my eyes, determined that her ruse wouldn't work. Unfortunately, my imagination supplied the details, even if my eyes couldn't. This wasn't helping. I gave up, opened my eyes, and relented far enough as to sit down on the edge of the bed, partly to hide my growing erection.

I realized that Siann had stopped right where she was when she had seen me refuse to look, and was now taking up where she had left off. Still making an elaborate show of not quite touching Iolaus, she continued to pull his leather pants down over his hips. The little traitor even helped out by lifting his body up far enough to make things easier for her! I'd have been angry at him, if I hadn't been so entranced by the amused expression on his face, not to mention the tufts of blond hair already showing at his groin.

He gave a long sigh as the edge of his trousers cleared his erect cock. Or maybe I was the one who sighed. I'm not entirely sure. The only thing I was sure of was that my cock was by now just as hard as his. Score one for the scheming wench who stopped her efforts to undress Iolaus and smiled at me gloatingly.

"Come on, Sweetie. Lie down and get comfortable. You can take off your clothes yourself, or you can let me do it."

Bowing to the inevitable, I stripped quickly and laid down next to her, determined not to react to anything she might do. I willed my cock to stop being so eager, but, with Iolaus still lying half-naked on the far side of the bed, that was a losing battle right from the start.

For a long moment, Siann just sat there, raking my body with her eyes. "Not bad, for an old dude," she finally concluded.

"Hmph! I doubt I'm that much older than you are," I retorted.

"Perhaps not." The vicious creature continued to look at me, as I firmly squelched the impulse to squirm.

"Could use more muscle," she remarked at last.

I didn't even dignify that with an answer.

"Now, how do you like it, Sweetie?" she persisted. "Do you prefer to lead, or follow?"

Not wanting to make things any easier for her, I didn't answer that either.

"Cat got your tongue? Okay, guess I'll have to find out for myself."

With that, she swung her leg over me so she was sitting on my thighs, then grabbed my hands and pinned them down at my sides. As soon as I got over my surprise, I tried to pull loose, but I'm ashamed to have to admit that she was not only taller than I am, but also stronger. Of course, it doesn't take a whole lot to be stronger than me, but still –-

She leaned forward, and for a moment I thought she was going to kiss me. But she didn't. Instead, she did as I had done to her, licking and kissing at the unbruised side of my neck and shoulders. My cock was pressed between our bodies, and seemed to be enjoying its position, much as I insisted that it not do so.

When she latched onto one of my nipples, I couldn't suppress a moan. And when she discovered that I enjoyed having her bite and suck hard on my chest and shoulders, she went at it even more enthusiastically. Her tongue became a small darting flame, scorching everything it touched as she moved here and there, first licking and then attacking viciously.

My eyes were closed and my head thrown back against the pillow. I was still trying to will my cock to stop its eager straining when she raised herself up and sat down on top of it in one swoop.

All right, so I was fucking a woman, even if she was the one doing most of the work.

My mind still insisted that I would not come, but the rest of my body disagreed strongly. In the end, as you might have guessed, my body won the argument, especially since I was so very conscious of Iolaus' presence, and the knowledge that he was watching us. The best I could do was to refrain from making any sounds that might indicate enjoyment, even as I emptied myself into Siann.

Satisfied, she got off of me as if she were dismounting from a horse, grabbing for a towel that hung near the bed and wiping herself off quickly and efficiently. After that, she tossed the towel at me so I could do likewise. 

Doubtless as a result of post-orgasmic mellowness, I almost admired her deliberately nonchalant attitude towards the whole thing. Now that I thought about it, I realize it was only Siann's sexual pushiness that had landed us all in bed together in the first place. I'd never have come on to Iolaus so flagrantly myself.

"It's a tie," Iolaus declared cheerily. "Looks as if you both get the prize."

Siann and I looked at each other for a moment. Then, making common cause, we both pounced on Iolaus, dragging off his boots and removing his trousers completely. At that point, I must confess to being rather uncertain what to do next. I simply was not used to having a woman as part of the action. 

Siann, however, seemed to have some ideas. "So we both win?" she asked sweetly, as she moved up alongside Iolaus, kissed him hard on the mouth and simultaneously slid him down further towards the foot of the bed. Breaking off the kiss, she let her eyes wander down the length of his body thoughtfully. There was a strange tone to her voice as she said, "Now, how can we share a treat like you?"

"How about I just lay back and let you two have your way with me?" Iolaus answered cheekily, looking from one of us to the other. 

I was staring hungrily at his still-hard cock, not entirely happy with the situation.

"Go on," Siann encouraged me. "I like to watch sometimes, too." 

Well, performing for a woman wasn't my usual style, but it was far from the most outrageous thing I had ever done in my life. I moved between Iolaus' legs and ran my hand up and down his shaft. He closed his eyes and settled himself more comfortably on the bed. Slowly, while trying to ignore Siann, I tried to take his straining cock in my mouth, only to find that I couldn't open my mouth that wide without pain. With an apologetic smile, I went back to using my hand, along with my tongue.

"Oh, Euphonius, that is so good," Iolaus sighed, thrusting lightly with his hips. Siann leaned over, so he could take one of her breasts in his mouth. I was almost jealous as I watched him bite and tease the nipple. Siann made a happy noise, and leaned completely over him, taking hold of his wrists and raising his arms above his head.

As I worked harder on his cock, using my favorite twist and slide up over the head and back again, I was rewarded with a groan and another thrust of his hips. 

"Do you like that, buddy?" Siann purred. "Both of us together?"

She only got a groan in response as I weighed his balls in my other hand, gently squeezing the sensitive testes within. I was getting into it, almost able to believe that Siann wasn't there, until I felt Iolaus jerk against me and go completely tense.

"Siann, let me go," Iolaus demanded.

I heard her laugh, and looked up somewhat awkwardly. She had maneuvered him so far down on the bed that she could kneel above him, her hands locked hard over his wrists as she held his arms pinned down. For his part, Iolaus struggled against that inexorable grip, trying to free his hands. As he did so, the muscles in his arms and chest showed tautly under the skin. It was a rather nice view, from my position between his legs.

"Siann --" Iolaus warned. 

I left off my rhythmic stroking, wondering if he was really angry, or just pretending to be. My uncertainty must have shown in my face, because Siann said, "Don't worry, he enjoys it this way." She pointed with her chin to his cock, which was as hard as it had been before. Then she leaned over and bit his nipple, drawing a hiss and a groan from his lips. "There, you see?" she assured me. "Five minutes, Euph. If he's soft or still complaining, then I'll let him go. Deal?"

I looked at Iolaus, who was watching us but no longer struggling. I had to admit, seeing him held like that with his cock standing hard was a temptation that would be difficult to resist. I licked his cock and then ran my tongue around the head. He groaned and twisted, but the thing that gave him away was how he spread his legs when I did it.

I grinned at him. "You do like it, don't you?" 

"Sure he does," Siann answered for him, as she moved to his other nipple. 

That was when the real competition between Siann and I began. We both started seeing who could draw the greatest number of moans, groans, hisses or pleas from our helpless captive. It didn't take long before he was begging us to stop teasing and get on with it.

"Enough, you two! Please! I am not your private play toy."

"No, you're not," Siann agreed in a silky sweet voice as she pushed his head over and chewed on his neck until he moaned again. "You're the prize. So just lie back and enjoy the ride. Euph and I are gonna drive you nuts."

"Euphonius!" I corrected automatically. She just looked at me and grinned. 

"He's gonna do you now," she whispered to Iolaus, and I watched his cock jump just at her words. That was clearly my cue. I got up off the bed and retrieved the small vial of scented oil that I always carry with my travel supplies. Still a little unsure of myself, I held it up for Iolaus to see clearly. "You okay with this?" 

"Oh, fuck," Iolaus panted, but his squirming gave me my answer. No doubt about it, he was enjoying himself.

Coming back to the bed and leaning down, I kissed him, forcing my tongue deep into his mouth. I had never been this aggressive with Iolaus before. In fact, thinking back on the first time we'd met, he had usually been the one taking the initiative. There was something exciting about having him held down and displayed before me this way, and it was something that awakened uncomfortable feelings in the back of my mind. 

But I had no time to care about that now. I wanted him badly. I laid down on top of him. He squirmed again, clearly trying to rub his swollen cock against my groin. "Hold still," I ordered, and was almost surprised when he promptly obeyed.

For just this one brief moment, Iolaus was mine. He might never be so again, for who could know what life might bring? But for now, he was mine, and I kissed the supple skin of his chest, feeling hard muscle underneath. That's what I love about men: the hardness, the sharp edges, the power and strength. Not the mushy softness of a woman's curves and crevasses. Although I had to admit that there was precious little softness about Siann. Ah well, I reminded myself, she was the exception, not the rule.

When I was possessed by another man, I loved his power, his hunger, his need. And when I was the one doing the possessing, his strength was mine, his courage mine, his body mine. There would be no squalling infant nine months later, no tearful recriminations, no protestations of everlasting love. No, just a meeting of two equals, for pleasure, for lust, and maybe to strengthen the bonds between us, so we would be more than simply friends, but nothing less than fellow men. 

"You are being cruel, Euphonius," I heard him gasp.

Siann laughed darkly, and I found myself enjoying the game. I settled myself back between Iolaus' legs and pressed a finger against him. He relaxed, and as I entered him, Siann leaned forward to bite sharply at one of his nipples. Iolaus came off the bed, and nearly pulled completely away from me. 

"Darling, he ain't in the mood for wine and roses. Let's get this going," Siann stated crudely.

I almost balked, but then I went with it, and purposely pressed my finger on that spot deep inside a man that can cause such pleasure, as Iolaus writhed and twisted against my probing hand.

After several moments of this, Iolaus opened his eyes and for a moment I froze. I saw an anger there I hadn't seen since -- Dahok. 

"Fuck me," he ordered hoarsely.

"Do it," Siann said. I lifted his legs over my shoulders. Quickly slathering oil on my cock, I pushed myself into him without further ado. He cried out, which only served to encourage me further. His ass was hot and tight and I could feel him squeezing me.

It didn't take long for Iolaus to moan and spasm around my cock. And yet, the memories of Dahok continued to haunt me, even as I drove myself rhythmically into the willing body before me, struggling to reach my own release. That was then. This is now. This is Iolaus, not some monstrous embodiment of evil. This is Iolaus, a man I respect and admire with all my heart. This is Iolaus, for whom I would give my very life, if necessary. This is Iolaus, and he has offered himself to me. 

I cried out quietly as white lightning spread outwards from my cock.

When I came to myself, I was sitting back on my knees, while Siann leaned on her arms over Iolaus.

"You two are cruel and inhuman," he gasped and then started laughing. Siann and I joined him, as she finally released his arms.

As soon as we were off guard, Iolaus pounced. Grabbing Siann roughly, he flipped her over onto her back and rolled on top of her. "All right, woman," he growled menacingly, "From here on, you're going to do what I say. I know this was all your idea, so Euphonius can just sit there and watch you get what you deserve."

I thought sure she was going to toss him across the room, since she outweighed him considerably and had the strength to do it. In fact, I was prepared for just about any reaction from Siann except what she did. She relaxed in his grip and replied meekly, "As you wish."

"Hands above your head and keep them there," he said, then proceeded to arouse her with varying amounts of gentleness and pretended cruelty, until they were both going at it full force, with him on top for a change. 

I made a point of keeping any least hint of jealousy or resentment out of my face as I watched the two of them getting it on. I wanted to appear relaxed, maybe even happy, at seeing their mutual pleasure. The fact that I actually did find myself happy at observing their enjoyment took me by surprise. I really wasn't jealous. Could that be possible?

There was a couple of times that what they were doing almost but not quite bothered me, because it was just too close to things I'd seen Dahok do to other people while he'd worn Iolaus' body. I had to remind myself that Dahok had seldom had their full cooperation and consent, while this –- well, this was a game, as anyone with half an eye could clearly see. Nevertheless, it had turned me on then, and it turned me on now. I was soon avidly jerking myself off in time to their rhythm, and we all came again, pretty close to simultaneously.

Finally we collapsed limply together on the bed, catching our collective breath. It was only then that a terrible thought occurred to me. 

"Uh – Siann --" I began. "Is there any chance you could get –- I mean, we've both --"

She caught my drift and laughed. "Don't worry, I'm too old for babies, if that's what you're trying to say. Isn't that just like a man?" she asked the universe in general, shaking her head. "When it's all over, that's when they ask. As if there's anything they could do about it by then."

Iolaus and I tried our best to look sheepish and contrite.

She rolled off the bed. "I would like to clean up just a little, though. Where's the washbasin? Oh, never mind. I see it over there."

Fitting her actions to her words, Siann strolled across the room. She grabbed a towel, dipped it in the tepid water, and turned away from us in order to gain what little privacy she could, under the circumstances.

I slid closer to Iolaus and kissed him gently on the lips, then broke off the kiss, content to just smile blearily into his eyes. This would have been the time to say, "I love you", had it been something I wanted to say. It would also have been the time for him to say it to me, had it been what he felt.

He blinked, and the blue eyes loosed themselves from mine. "Uh – Euphonius --" he began softly, uncomfortably, a shadow crossing his face.

Deliberately, I put a finger on his mouth before he could say more. There were no "I love you's" here, and I knew it.

"No promises," I replied, more a matter of my lips forming the words than my voice actually saying them. None of this was anything I wanted Siann to hear. "But if you ever do need someone, I'll be there," I finished.

His lips tightened into that determined look he has. He nodded his head a fraction to show that he understood, just as Siann plopped down onto the bed again.

The sleepy daze of happy satiety fell over us then like a fleecy blanket, as we lay there entangled. Iolaus was the first to succumb and doze off, his head on Siann's shoulder while I was snuggled against his other side. The sore muscles where I'd been punched had begun to stiffen a little, now that I was in a condition to notice them again. I sighed.

Siann raised her head so she could see my face and said softly, "This isn't just screwing around, is it? You really care about him."

"Whatever gave you that idea?" I asked, still unwilling to make myself vulnerable to this woman.

"Oh, little things. Like the look in your eyes sometimes, or the way you touched him. Or the words that you seem to want to say, but don't."

"Okay, yes, I care. But he belongs to Hercules. I know that."

"So do I," she said, very seriously. "Too bad for the rest of us, eh?"

I sighed softly as I admitted, "Yeah. Too bad."

There was a thin film of sadness in her eyes as she said, "Maybe we do have something in common after all, huh?"

"Could be," I admitted. Then I couldn't resist adding impulsively, "Maybe more than you think. Look, I know I'm not a warrior like you are. But I've fought my own battles. I know pain, and I know what it's like to try to protect something, only to have it slip away no matter what I do." Dahok, my conscience whispered to me. Unwillingly, I added, "And I know what it's like to have to live with things I'm sorry that I've done."

She closed her eyes in what might have been a wince of pain, and nodded a fraction, then surprised me by reaching over and drawing a hand down my cheek in a gentle caress. "Go to sleep," she murmured.

I snuggled closer against Iolaus, enjoying the lazy, comfortable feeling that usually comes after sex. Even as I lay there, I couldn't help thinking just how very rare and precious this was. How often did I have his body close against mine, or feel the slight motion of his chest as he breathed, peacefully asleep and safe by my side? In that brief moment, I had all I ever wanted. But moments like that don't last, except in memory, and this one was no exception.

I was almost asleep when the urgent sound of a gong invaded my drowsy musings, repeated over and over. I tried to ignore it, but Siann's voice cried out, "Iolaus, get up! That's the alarm! There's trouble!"

Alarm? Trouble? Had I heard that right?

I sat bolt upright in the bed, no longer even the least bit tired. On either side, my companions were hastily pulling on their clothes and boots.

"What's going on?" I asked, searching belatedly for my own trousers.

Siann gave me her trademark mocking grin. "Why knows? Maybe it's those nasty pirates you were so worried about."

"Pirates?" I repeated stupidly.

"Yeah." She strapped her sword around her waist. "You know, those awful people who attack and raid nice little towns like ours?"

I turned to Iolaus, my eyes pleading for reassurance.

"Don't worry," he said. "It's probably nothing. You stay here while we check it out."

Then they were both gone, in a clatter of steel and boots going down the stairs.

As I got dressed, I thought about what Iolaus had said. But I didn't stay there, since I didn't know where Dari was, or what was going on. I splashed water into my face from the bowl on the nightstand, trying to force my muzzy brain to think faster.

The entire interlude had surely not lasted long. Outside the window, it was still light. Early afternoon, at the latest. Where would Dari be? That was easy: still hanging out with her heroes on the practice field. But they'd have gone to answer the alarm. Certainly, they'd have told her not to follow them, but would she have obeyed? I wanted to think so, but knowing Dari –

I set out to find the girl. People were running around the streets in a panic, women screaming for their children, and men and boys rushing this way and that, grabbing up makeshift weapons.

"What's going on?" I asked a boy, snagging him by the arm as he ran past.

"Pirates!" he gasped. "Tellis and his gang anchored their ship somewhere and are attacking us from the hills!"

He jerked his arm away and I let him go.

Cursing equally my own ill luck and my own stupidity in coming here, I fought my way along the street towards the place where I hoped to find Dari. I suppose I should have noticed that most of the townspeople were now running in the other direction, but I was too intent on my goal to pay attention.

The practice field was deserted as I stumbled up the rise, gasping for breath from the run. "Dari!" I yelled, in between trying to catch my breath.

A soft voice came from behind a nearby bush. "Over here, Uncle Euphonius. Quick!"

I discovered her squatting behind the bush, her staff across her knees and her eyes trained on the far end of the field, where I could hear shouting and the general commotion of a skirmish.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded.

"Shh," she hissed, not even glancing at me. "Vachon told me to hide and keep watch on their rear, then run to warn the town if things looked bad. Get down and out of sight."

Instead of taking her eminently sensible advice, I pulled her to her feet and started back towards the town. "We've got to get out of here."

But Dari dug in her heels. "Uncle Euphonius --"

"Come on! I don't want anything to happen to you."

"I can't just run away."

"Of course you can," I replied angrily, pulling even harder on her arm. "You're a child."

"No. I'm a warrior."

"Dari --"

I stopped when I saw a stranger appear from the side of the field, running toward us with a heavy club raised above his head.

Without thinking, I whipped the knife out of my boot and threw it at him. 

And missed. Oh yeah, I hit him, but only in the arm, not in the chest, as I had intended. An arm wound won't stop someone.

I was so surprised at my poor aim that I stood there staring at him for too long a moment before I turned to Dari, shoving her toward the town and telling her fiercely, "Run. No arguments. Go!"

I started to turn back to face our attacker, but something heavy and hard came down across my back, and I fell. As I rolled myself into a ball, the club smashed into the arm I had covering my head, then fell again and again. I could do nothing, under the fierce rain of blows. When it stopped, I fully expected to feel a sword thrust through my body.

 

Without warning, the pain was gone, and I seemed to be floating, looking down at myself, with an armored man standing over me, sword drawn. I wondered quizzically if I was dead yet, or just about to be. Then I saw Dari running at my attacker, shrieking like a banshee, her little dagger in her hand, held low in a proper fighting stance. "No!" I tried to say, but no sound came from my mouth. "Run! Run! You can't win!"

I struggled to move, but could only float motionless. Then it all began to spin around, faster and faster, and I found myself falling down a long, dark tunnel, panic-stricken. There was a faint light somewhere up ahead. I was moving toward it. With an effort, I fought down the panic and concentrated on the growing light. Images flashed through my mind, images from my life. They went so fast that I could hardly take it all in, but the most important moments seared themselves into my mind as they flew fast. Some part of me decided this was my life flashing before my eyes, and I was being asked to make a judgement of it. 

You'd be surprised at the things that turned out to be on the positive side of the ledger. And also some of the negative things. Not always what I had thought, if you'd asked me about it before all this happened.

I hit solid ground, rolled a bit, then came to a stop.

Cautiously, I climbed to my feet. I was in a dimly lit cavern of stone, with a dark river flowing sluggishly through it. I took a few steps forward, marveling at the stalactites hanging from the shadowy ceiling high above and the massive stalagmites jutting up from the ground. When nothing awful happened, I moved on towards the river. Hearing a strange noise from the direction of the water, I squinted out into the mist hanging just above the surface and caught sight of a weird boat approaching the shore, with an even weirder person pushing it along with a pole.

I stood frozen in amazement as he brought his boat alongside the bank and stepped ashore. He was even odder up close, with a greenish face, large hooked nose, black lips and broken teeth. A ragged black cloak and hood covered most of his body and head, but his hands were gnarled and claw-like. 

Noticing me, he frowned then gestured toward his boat, and said grumpily, "Well, don't just stand there wasting my time. Get in. And you'd better have a coin for me. I don't do this for the fun of it, ya know."

I still stood there staring, unable to make sense of his instructions.

When I didn't comply immediately, he shook his head in disgust and muttered to himself, "It ain't fair. It just ain't fair. I'm expected to work my fingers to the bone, and half these mortals don't even have the foresight to bring one little coin along with them, to repay poor old Charon for his trouble. I gotta talk to Hades about putting me on salary, then I wouldn't have to put up with all these passengers thinkin' I'll take them for free, just out of the goodness of my heart."

The truth was beginning to penetrate my unwilling mind. This was Charon, ferryman of the dead.

"I – I don't have a coin," I said uncertainly. Recalling the ruby ring I had bought, I slid it off my finger and held it out to him. "Would you consider this instead?"

He turned his baleful gaze onto my hand and retorted, "A ring with a shiny pink stone? What, do I look like Aphrodite or somethin'?

"Uh –- no. Not really."

"Then what would I want with your fancy jewelry?"

"Well, it's worth quite a bit --"

"It is?" He leaned in closer, then drew back. "Wait a minute." Much to my dismay, he took hold of my arm, squeezing it in his clawlike fingers. Then he sniffed at me experimentally. "Why are you wantin' to cross the Styx anyway? You ain't dead yet."

"I ain't? Uh – I mean, I'm not?"

He took another sniff, then shook his head. "Definitely not. Don't smell dead. I can tell." 

"You're sure I'm not dead?" I replied, more in surprise than relief. After all, my last glimpse at my body hadn't boded well for my survival. I wouldn't have been the least bit surprised if Dari turned up here soon also, judging by what had been going on.

Shaking his head impatiently, Charon retorted, "Nah. Close maybe, but not dead."

"Then how come I'm here?" I waved my hand at the rocky cavern surrounding us. Maybe I should delay a while, in case Dari did appear. 

"Dunno." He glowered at me, perplexed. Then he thrust his awful face close to mine. "OK, buddy. What are you trying to pull? What's a live mortal doing at my ferry landing? Is this some kind of surprise inspection the boss is pulling on me? Checking up on old Charon? What's the story, eh? 'Fess up."

I backed away. "I don't know. I'm as puzzled as you are. Really."

"You ain't working for Hades?"

"Oh, my goodness no! Never met the fellow." And don't particularly want to, although the God of the Underworld is said to be quite attractive.

Charon seemed stuck on that piece of information. Then he made a decision. "All right then, if you're not dead, you're wastin' my time. Go on now," he said, making a shooing motion with his hands, "Get outta here!"

"Where am I supposed to go?"

"Back where you came from. Shoo! Away with you!" 

He turned his back on me and started for his boat.

Frustrated and irritated, I grabbed his dingy black cloak and tugged on it insistently.  
"Wait a minute. I don't know how to get back." 

As he swung around to face me, strange visions danced through my head. Images of blood and battlefields that I had never known personally. The memory of being beaten, just before I found myself here. Faces of old warriors, blinded, mutilated, limbs missing, bodies twisted in constant pain. And the certain knowledge that there were fates worse than death, like living with your mind already dead, raving in a locked room, or just staring out at an empty world from an empty soul.

Maybe it would be wiser to quit while I'm ahead, now that I know there truly is some sort of existence after death. There was always the possibility that I had a good chance at the Elysian Fields right now, but who knows what could happen later in my life? If I went back, I might screw things up entirely, even if it turned out that I recovered fully from whatever wounds I had taken.

I shook off these unencouraging thoughts and added, to Charon, "I'm not sure I want to go back, even if I could."

"Huh? Why not, buddy?" Shaking his head, he muttered to himself, "Most mortals cry and carry on when they find themselves here, and this one doesn't want to leave." He tapped his head with a knowing gesture. "Crazy."

If I were to get any sort of help from the old man, I would have to explain my hesitation. 

"I was in the process of being beaten pretty badly when I found myself here. How do I know I won't go back and just have to suffer all kinds of pain and stuff, then just die again in a few days? Or worse, live as a demented cripple?" I shuddered at the thought of such a thing. "Maybe I'm better off out of it all, at this point."

"Yeah, sure. And you'll love it in Tartarus, I suppose?"

"I – was rather hoping for the Elysian Fields," I replied diffidently.

"Ha! They're all hoping for that, pal. But they don't all make it."

"Really? That seems rather unfair."

"Hey, I don't make the rules. I'm just the ferryman." Nevertheless, he seemed taken aback by my question. The twisted, blackened face contorted into an even more macabre expression that could have indicated a hidden pain. "You really want to know the truth about that?" he asked me, with what seemed an attempt at confidentiality.

"Yeah."

"There really ain't very many people in Tartarus. You haveta be pretty evil to earn that kinda punishment." 

"But what about all those stories --?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know all that. You mortals just love to exaggerate, don't you? Even so, didya ever actually count up how many people they're about?"

"Well, no."

"Not very many, I can tell ya that for sure." He glanced around, as if afraid of being overheard. "Don't tell no one, but Hades ain't a bad guy, for a God. He can be pretty merciful, if you ask him nice and don't piss him off."

"Thanks. I'll keep that in mind." I held my hand in front of me, ostentatiously examining the ruby ring I still held. If he liked coins and valuables, maybe a little bribery would get me even more information. "You don't happen to know who goes where, do you?" I asked casually.

"Me? 'Course not! Like I said, I'm in charge of transportation, not judgement."

"Oh." Clenching my fist around the ring, I stood there hesitantly. The Elysian Fields were supposed to be very nice, but still, could I be sure I wouldn't end up in Tartarus, even after what the old man had said about it being rather sparsely populated?

Much to my alarm, Charon put a hand on my shoulder, drawing me to the riverside to face his boat. "All right, make up your mind, pal. I don't have all the time in the world, ya know."

"But --"

"But, but, but!" He threw up his arms in exasperation. "Trouble with your kind is you think too much. It's very simple: you wanna stay here or you wanna go back? Which is it?"

The bloody images ran through my mind again, coupled with a vision of myself terribly mutilated, living out the rest of a short and wretchedly painful life. Or worse, living on for years with no real mind left, cared for only until my wealth ran out, then cast into the street to die a miserable death. 

I shrugged and tried very hard to keep any hint of self-pity out of my voice. "Maybe I should just stay, now that I'm here. There's really nothing to go back to. It's not like I have a family or anything. Nobody would miss me all that much."

Charon studied me, his eyes narrowed. 

With a gesture of one twisted hand, a scene flared into being next to us. Dari stood at my bedside, tears running down her face even as she attempted to put on a brave front. On the other side of the bed, Iolaus knelt next to my bandaged head, whispering in my ear, "Come on, buddy. Don't give up. You can make it." Were there tears shining in those blue eyes?

I heard Charon's voice, sounding almost kind now. "Nobody, huh?"

The pathetic picture dissolved, and I was standing once more on the shore of the River Styx.

Charon leaped down into his boat, waving up to me. "OK, sure, there's nothing for you to go back to. So you just hop on down here and we'll be off. I've wasted enough time on this one fare already. Got lots more work to do." 

I hesitated.

"Come on, then," he repeated. "Don't stand there goggling at me! Give me that fancy little ring of yours and we'll be off."

I thought again of Dari's tear-stained face, and Iolaus' words. If that had been a true vision, at least they were both still alive and well.

Could it be possible that Iolaus really did care a lot about me, even if it was nothing like what he felt towards Hercules? In my mind, I saw again his taut body, stretched out on the bed between me and Siann. He'd enjoyed the sex, no doubt about that. But was there anything beyond that? Yes, of course there was. There always had been, even if it couldn't be called love.

And Dari. Wouldn't it be great to watch her grow up, see what kind of a woman she was going to turn into? Well, but I could see that from the Elysian Fields, couldn't I? Yeah, but I couldn't help her along, couldn't be really there to advise her or provide for her or anything.

But if I were to go back to my life, and be nothing but a mindless vegetable? Did I really want Iolaus to remember me that way? And would I be any use at all to Dari? Was it worth the risk? 

Charon cleared his throat impatiently and I knew I had to choose, one way or another.   
"No," I said, stepping back away from the waiting boat. "I – I think I'll stay."

The ferryman shrugged elaborately, then pointed at the far end of the cavern. "Up to you, pal. Just head on back that way, and you'll get there."

As I turned and started walking, the world began to fade to black around me. The last thing I heard was that irascible voice behind me saying, "I lose more fares that way." A gruff chuckle. "Oh well, less work for old Charon. I can use the rest."

Then I saw before my eyes the bedside scene that Charon had showed me, and it felt as if I were being pushed back into my bruised and beaten body, being forced once more into a cramped and uncomfortable place.

The sudden pain in my head and in my right arm forced a groan from my lips. It took all my energy just to open my eyes, but when I did, I was rewarded by one of Iolaus' bright smiles and a sharp exclamation of joy from Dari. She fell on me, hugging me as best she could, while Iolaus' smile grew wider.

"Hi, buddy," he said.

I winced at the enthusiasm of Dari's hug on my bruised body, as things came into focus. My right arm was tightly bandaged and bound across my chest. If I had to make a guess, I'd say it was broken. I seemed to hurt all over. My head throbbed, and I could feel a bandage wrapped around it. But my thoughts seemed to be in good order, and all my fingers and toes moved when I tried to wiggle them. Relief washed through me like a flood.

"Hi, yourself," I replied weakly, as Dari's tears ran down onto my shoulder. I tried my best to smile.

Iolaus held a cup to my lips. "Here. Drink some of this. Siann left it for you, in case you came around. It'll help clear your head." 

I sipped dutifully, but my mind was on other things. "You'll never guess what happened to me. I was at the River Styx and I talked to Charon! I thought sure I was dead. I --"

I started to describe what had gone on, words tumbling chaotically over each other.

"Euphonius?" Iolaus interrupted, before I had fairly launched into my tale.

"What?"

"You're babbling," he said with the smile that could light up even Hades' dark domain.

"I am? No, you don't understand. It really happened that way."

"Sure, it did," he said in the same tone used to humor a madman.

"But –- but you've been there, haven't you? You've seen --"

The expression on his face warned me to drop it even before his voice told me, "Yeah, I have. But experiences in the Underworld are best kept to oneself. What happens there is for you alone to know, not anyone else."

"Oh."

Siann walked into the room, in the middle of my thoughtful silence. She placed one hand on Dari's shoulder, as she took in the fact that I was clearly back with them and in fairly decent condition.

"Dari saved your life, you know," Siann said. "She stabbed the guy who attacked you, then kept him occupied with her staff until Iolaus and I could get there."

"Are you serious? Dari beat that big lug who almost killed me? You have got to be kidding!"

"Uh-uh."

"But how could she --"

"She knew what she was doing; he didn't. No mystery there. Besides, he made the mistake of not taking a child seriously as an opponent."

"But she's so much smaller."

"Yeah," Iolaus broke in, smiling as always. "In case you haven't noticed, so am I."

He had me there.

"If you'd taken away that dagger, back when we found out she had it," he went on, "I doubt Dari would have been able to defend you with only her staff. You'd have been dead, buddy. You realize that, don't you?"

"Yeah," I was forced to conclude reluctantly. I looked at the girl with more appreciation. 

She beamed proudly at all the praise she'd heard, then laid her hand on the hilt of the knife at her belt. "This is going to be my offering for Ares, when we get to Corinth."

At that, Siann laughed loudly. "Ares? You'd give your only weapon to that son-of-a-bitch?"

Dari stared in surprise, but Iolaus just nodded sagely and suggested to me, "Speaking of Gods, as soon as you're up to it, I think we ought to make an offering to Athena, for our success against the pirates."

"Athena?" Dari exclaimed incredulously, then went on to ask the question that was on my lips also. "Why her? What's wrong with Ares?"

Siann gave another harsh laugh. "He's not the God of real warriors."

"But isn't he the God of War?" I pointed out.

"War and being a warrior don't always go together." Dari still looked puzzled, so Siann went on, "A warrior is someone who's trained and prepared to use force to defend what he or she thinks is right. That doesn't mean you can't be wrong, of course. It only means you have the training and physical power to do something. How you use that power is up to you." She gave the girl a questioning glance. "You with me so far?"

"Yeah," Dari responded, sounding rather disappointed.

"Trust me on this, kid. You're much better off to be following Athena than Ares, if you want to make the right decisions about how to use your skills. Ares is supposed to represent victory and defeat, valor and cowardice, but if you look at it closer, Athena embodies the idea of wisdom, which springs from power and deep experience, and is produced in love and fear and pain. She endures violent confrontation only as a means to peace, or in defense of the innocent." Siann smiled and shrugged apologetically, as if she realized the lecturing tone that had come into her voice. "Besides, under his façade of bravery, Ares is a coward and a kiss-ass. Remember the way he betrayed the other Gods to Dahok?"

Iolaus' lips thinned at the mention of Dahok, but he nodded. "Yeah. The big, bad God of War was willing to sell out everybody else in order to save his own hide. Real brave, huh? You want to be like that?"

"I guess not," Dari admitted unhappily. Then her face brightened and she smiled. "But I want to be like you. And like you, Siann. So if you both say we should make an offering to Athena, then Athena it is. I'll give her my dagger."

Siann clapped her on the back. "Good girl! We have a temple right here in town. It's not much, compared to the ones in the big cities, but it will do."

I almost objected, but then I thought better of it. If Dari truly was determined to follow this path in her life, I'd much rather see her emulating Athena than Ares. I knew too well what Ares was like.

"All right," I said with a long-suffering sigh. "As soon as I'm up and about, we'll go to Athena's temple."

"That's the spirit, Euphonius," the woman agreed.

"Euphonius? You actually called me by my proper name? Sure you didn't make a mistake there?"

"No mistake. Dari told me how you faced up to that guy who beat the shit out of you, trying to give her a chance to run away," she said grudgingly. "Guess you're not entirely a wimp at that."

"Gee, thanks," I replied, keeping a light tone. I had a fair idea of how very much such an admission cost a person like Siann, and I didn't want to rub it in. Turning away, she busied herself with one of her little pouches of herbs, then handed me some of that pain-killing leafy stuff.

"Hey," I said, trying to talk as I placed the crumpled leaves under my tongue, "what happened with the pirates, anyway? We obviously won, but how?"

Siann, Iolaus, and Dari all tried to tell me the tale at once. From the chaos of enthusiastic descriptions of heroic exploits and military maneuvers, I gathered that the man who attacked me had been an advance scout for a flanking movement, which failed when he didn't return to warn the rest of the pirates that Iolaus and Siann were there, ready and waiting for them, having been drawn by Dari's screams and the commotion of her battle. In the ensuing confusion, the pirates were soundly defeated, their ship captured and burned.

 

By the time a day had passed, I was feeling much better. I was still in bed, but probably could have gotten up, had I wanted to. As it was, I enjoyed Iolaus' frequent visits, and his solicitude. There can be definite advantages to being hurt and bed-ridden, so long as one isn't too badly hurt to enjoy them. 

That evening, he brought me a bowl of stew and a bottle of wine. 

"Oh, but that looks delicious!" I exclaimed cheerfully. When I made a show of struggling into a sitting position, he came over and helped me up, which I didn't mind at all. Gave me an excuse to have his arms around me, if only briefly. Before I let him go, I added, "It would be nice if these pillows were plumped up a bit higher behind me."

Iolaus promptly took hold of one of the pillows and swatted me with it, very gently.

"What did you do that for?" I asked. 

By now, he was laughing. "Because I think you're milking this for all it's worth."

"Oh, you think so, do you?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well," I began indignantly, reaching for the bowl of stew somewhat clumsily with my left hand, "it just so happens --" I changed my tone abruptly and finished with a grin "— that you're right."

He took a swig from the wine bottle as he sat on the side of the bed, suddenly serious. "You need to talk to Dari."

"Why? What's wrong?" My attention was mostly on balancing the bowl between my legs and feeding myself with my only good hand. No easy matter, I assure you.

"The man she stabbed with her dagger just died. She's been going by to see how he was doing ever since you started to recover, and she's taking it pretty hard."

I was so surprised that I dropped a chunk of meat into my lap. "I didn't know --"

"We didn't want to tell you, since you were in no very great shape yourself at first. But it was a nasty gut wound and his death was slow and painful. Dari saw some of that. I didn't discourage her, because I know how much you want her to realize the downside of being a warrior, so --"

I held up my hand. "Don't worry, you did right."

"Yeah, well, anyway, now she's pretty upset, but she won't talk to me or Siann about it. I think she's trying to show us how brave she is, or something. I thought maybe you'd have better luck."

I set my empty bowl aside and took a sip of wine. "I'm not sure she'll talk to me either, but I'll give it a try."

He stood. "I'll go find her and send her up."

I nodded, worried.

It wasn't long before the girl appeared, carrying a plate with some sliced fruit. 

"Hi, Uncle Euphonius," she said, more subdued than usual. She set the plate on the bed beside me. "Iolaus told me to bring this to you."

"Thank you, my dear. Here, why don't you sit down and have some yourself?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Well then, sit down and keep me company while I eat." I took a fig and popped it into my mouth, as she obediently perched on the edge of the bed.

After a few abortive attempts to start a conversation that had been met with a morose syllable or two, I reached over and snagged my money pouch from the chair beside the bed. Bringing out a shiny coin, I held it out to Dari and said invitingly, "A dinar for your thoughts."

"My thoughts aren't worth a dinar."

"They are to me. Here. Take it."

She did, then licked her lips hesitantly before she spoke. "I'm thinking that death isn't really a very nice thing," she said, with a bitterness in her voice that I had never heard there before. 

"No, it's not." I thought back to my experience with Charon. If that truly had been a visit to the Underworld and life continued on after death, that provided a certain amount of consolation. Even so, dying isn't a whole lot of fun, no matter how you look at it. 

"But you know that already, Dari," I went on. "You stood by my father's funeral pyre with me. And you've known other people who have died."

"Yeah." Her voice grew softer, barely audible. "But I wasn't the one who killed them."

"Ah! That makes a difference, doesn't it?"

She nodded. One hand strayed down to the dagger at her side and she ran her fingers over the hilt. "I – I think I understand a little of how Siann and some of the others feel."

"Your quick actions saved my life," I pointed out.

"I know. And I wouldn't do anything differently if I had to do it again. But he was still a human being, just like you. Or Iolaus. Or me."

"Everyone you kill will be just another human being. And if you follow the path you're on now, you will have to kill again, sooner or later."

She nodded again, fingers still playing with the knife that had taken a man's life. "But Uncle Euphonius, if I hadn't learned how to fight, you would be dead. And without Siann and the others, the whole town would have been taken over by pirates and lots of other people would be dead."

"Uh-huh. But is that what you want your life to be like? Do you really want to be the one who does the fighting? And the killing? And maybe the dying?"

"I think so. At least, I thought I did. I'm not sure." She turned anguished eyes on me. "Oh, Uncle Euphonius, I just feel so awful!"

I reached out and hugged her against me with my good arm. "There, there, my dear. If you didn't feel guilty, there would be something wrong with you."

She held tightly to me, but, much to my surprise, there were no tears. "I love you," she said at last.

"I love you too." Strange, but my father and I had said the same thing to each other, just before he died. Only now, I was the one making the reply. I smoothed her hair and kissed the top of her head. She held me for a second longer, then sat back.

Taking the wine bottle from the table by the bed, I held it out to her and said, just as I would have to another adult, "Here. You look as if you could use a drink."

She brightened at this grown-up treatment, then took a generous couple of swallows.

I looked at her, very straightforward and adult. "We'll be leaving for home in another day or so. Think about all of this carefully. You don't have to decide the course of your entire life just yet, you know. There's plenty of time."

"All right, Uncle Euphonius. I'll do that." A hint of a smile crossed her face. "May I have one of those figs now?"

I passed her the plate, entirely satisfied with the results of our little discussion.

 

The next morning, we went to Athena's temple, as planned. It turned out that we were not alone, since a good many of the other townsfolk were there, also intent on honoring the Goddess for their recent deliverance from the pirates. Iolaus had told me that the warriors who had actually fought in the battle had gotten their share of honors from the civilians as well, in the form of many feasts, celebrations, and individual monetary awards for valor.

As we stood amongst the crowd waiting to make offerings, Dari fidgeted nervously beside me, staring back and forth from the dagger at her waist to the statue of Athena behind the altar. I was pretty sure she didn't really want to give it up, whether to Ares or Athena. It had cost her a lot of hard work. It occurred to me that I could use that fact to my advantage. Offering a weapon to any God whose jurisdiction covered warfare was usually considered to be more of a commitment than other types of sacrifices, but I didn't think Dari realized that.

Awkwardly, because of my broken right arm, which was still strapped across my chest, I reached into my belt pouch and pulled out a gold coin. "Here," I whispered, slipping the coin into her hand. "Give this to Athena instead. It's worth a lot more than the dagger anyway."

She looked around from side to side to see if anyone had seen me give her the coin, then smiled and whispered back, "Thanks, Uncle Euphonius." 

As the line of worshippers moved slowly towards the altar, I congratulated myself on my success. Besides, I had also scored a point by showing myself to be sympathetic to her feelings. Maybe now she'd be more willing to listen to my advice in other matters. Maybe our little talk last night had eroded her desire to be a warrior. 

I said nothing more about it while we waited. Sometimes silence is the best policy. Let her convince herself that I was right after all. It could still happen. She could just make an offering to thank the Goddess for our safety, like everyone else was doing. It didn't have to mean anything more than that.

Iolaus and Siann were just in front of us in line, talking quietly to each other. I glanced around the crowd, seeing a few familiar faces. One-armed Vachon was easy to spot, towering above the others as he did. Myka stood next to him. 

Personally, I was rather bored. Athena isn't one of the Goddesses I usually deal with. Truth to be told, I try not to attract the attention of any of the Immortals most of the time. Much safer that way. 

By the time we finally drew near to the altar, my injured arm was throbbing unpleasantly and I felt just a bit unsteady on my feet. Too late, I realized I should have asked Siann for some more of those pain-killing herbs. However, not only was I determined to be here with Dari, but I also didn't want to show any weakness in front of Siann or Iolaus, so I said nothing about it except to wish that things would move along faster.

I couldn't hear Siann's prayer to Athena, but I saw her lay several gold coins on the altar. Iolaus, on the other hand, spoke loudly enough that I could make out several references to Xena and Gabrielle as he set down his offering. There were tears on his face as he turned away from the over-laden altar and joined Siann and me, where we waited beside Dari.

Our turn came next, much to my relief.

Without a moment of hesitation, Dari walked up and added her gold coin to the piles of other valuables already there. I expected her to move back quickly, so we could get out of there and I could go rest, but she stood for a moment, looking up at the statue of the Goddess behind the altar. The statue stared down at her sternly. Just life-size, it was a fairly realistic attempt to portray Athena, to my way of thinking. While beautiful, the oval face gave the impression of great dignity, not mere prettiness. She was depicted wearing a short skirt, with a tightly laced bodice above it, her hair done up neatly on her head. In her left hand, she held an ornate shield, while the other hand reached forward towards her supplicants. 

Much to my dismay, Dari placed her little dagger on the altar next to the coin.

Something changed in the atmosphere inside the temple. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, as if in response to some strange sort of energy. The statue shimmered with silver light, then seemed to come to life.

With a collective gasp of amazement, the crowd pulled back, leaving Dari staring open-mouthed at the Goddess of Wisdom herself. 

Out of all the riches piled before her, Athena took up the little dagger. Then her piercing gray eyes fixed on Dari, as she said, "Child, this dagger has tasted human blood. How has it been used? Have you dared to take a life at your age?"

The girl just stood there, too awed and scared out of her wits to answer.

"Forgive me, Lady," Siann said firmly, stepping forward to place herself next to the astonished child. "Dari has indeed killed, but only because she was forced to defend an unarmed man in danger of death, at the risk of her own life. Had Iolaus and I not arrived in time, the attacker might have killed them both."

"I see," the Goddess said slowly. Much to my relief, her face broke into a gentle smile as she turned her attention again to Dari. 

"Then you have acted properly, and with courage," she proclaimed. "Such a deed deserves a reward." 

Suddenly, the plain dagger in Athena's hand turned into something else: something longer and made of finer metal, with an ornate design on the handle. Next to it lay an embossed leather sheath, with a matching belt attached. 

Athena slid the knife into its sheath and held it out to Dari. "Wear this, child, as a symbol of your dedication to me."

Her face glowing, Dari took the offered gift, strapping it around her waist. "Thank you, Lady," she replied solemnly. "May I use it always in a manner acceptable to you." She glanced at Iolaus and Siann. "And may I never kill again, except in dire need."

I saw the conflicted look on Siann's face, as she heard Dari's words, and I thought I knew what she was thinking. Quickly, impulsively, I slid my ruby ring off my finger, stepped up to the altar, and laid it beside Siann's offering.

"Merciful Goddess," I said, "in your great wisdom, be mindful of another of your followers here and accept this in support of the battle she fights within her heart."

Athena apparently knew who I meant. Bending a stern and sorrowful gaze upon Siann, she leaned forward and addressed her so quietly that few others could hear. "My daughter, you know that there's no way to truly atone for the past. The dead cannot be brought back to life, the suffering cannot be undone, and the blood can never be truly washed from your hands." 

"Yes, Lady. I know that," was the sad reply.

"The only thing that can be done is to do good in the present, as best you can, in memory of the wrongs you have done in the past. Therein lies as much forgiveness as it is possible for a mortal to find."

A single tear ran down Siann's face. She nodded, but did not lower her eyes.

Athena's severe expression softened. She placed one hand on the woman's shoulder and said, so softly I had to strain my ears to make out the words, "You have done everything that could possibly be expected of you, Siann. Go in peace."

As the Goddess' form wavered, then solidified back into the statue, Siann looked up at me and smiled, a bright and genuine smile this time, not that mocking grimace she usually used.

I smiled back. Dari and Iolaus rushed over to hug her, but I stood aside, watching and thinking. No, the warrior life never had been, and never would be, mine. But did I have the right to so easily dismiss what the men and women of Gargatha had experienced, disdaining them as ruffians and trouble-makers, just because they reminded me of things I did not wish to know? Could I condemn their bitterness, their insanity, their violence, and their arrogance, when I had lived an easy and comfortable life while they were out there fighting to conquer Troy?

And if the war itself had turned out to be pretty useless, and the battles only dubious triumphs, did that detract from the courage they had shown and the hurts they had taken?

For what, after all, is a hero, if not someone who puts their life on the line in the service of something beyond merely himself, or herself, alone?

 

As we walked out of the temple together, I was turning something over in my mind as I listened to the talk going on around me. With the excitement over, I also found myself distracted by the renewed pain in my broken arm. I hugged it tighter against my chest with my good arm, wishing it would stop bothering me so that I could think clearly. I wanted nothing more than to return to my room at the tavern and rest, preferably with some of Siann's herbal medications to help me out.

Meanwhile, the conversation went on around me.

"Does Athena usually appear like that?" Dari asked, her voice still reflecting awe.

"Not usually, no. But now and then," Siann replied.

"But I'm just a little girl. Why would she bother with me?"

"Perhaps it's exactly because you are a little girl that she appeared," Iolaus suggested. "The rest of us – well, we chose our lives a long time ago. Athena knows us, but you're new to all this." Taking her by the shoulders, he turned her to face him square on. "Also, you're at a decision point. You've killed a man, Dari. You've had enough time to realize what that means. Do you truly wish to continue on the path you've started? Or would you rather go back and choose another life for yourself?"

This brought my attention firmly back to the present and away from my personal hurt. I held my breath as Dari bowed her head, then said softly with closed eyes and a catch in her voice, "I'll go on."

Not the answer I had hoped for. My hopes wilted. As Iolaus drew her into a hug, I sighed and gave in gracefully to the inevitable. "Iolaus, about that academy you mentioned a few days ago? The one Jason's running?"

Releasing the girl, he looked at me, a puzzled frown etching vertical lines between his eyes. "Yeah?"

"What would it take to get Dari into it?"

I saw Dari's eyes fly from the lovely new dagger at her waist up to my face.

"First of all, money for the tuition," Iolaus said guardedly.

"Not a problem."

His frown turned to surprise. "If you're serious, I'll be glad to give her my recommendation. I'm sure Siann would also."

Siann nodded.

"I'd appreciate that," I replied wearily.

"You mean it, Uncle Euphonius?!" Dari exclaimed. "Really?"

"Yes. As long as your mother agrees to it."

"Oh, she will! I know I can convince her." She threw herself at me, wrapping her arms around my waist and doing her best to squeeze the life out of my body, but still being mindful of my broken arm. "Thank you, Uncle Euphonius! Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Don't thank me, my dear. Thank Athena. After all, who am I to disagree with a Goddess?"

Siann and Iolaus stood there, beaming at us and at each other. I think my face must have gone paler than usual, since Iolaus put his arm around my waist and said, "Come on. Let's get you back to the inn."

 

A couple of days later, as we prepared to leave, there were three horses awaiting our departure, rather than the original two. It seems that Siann and her friends had all chipped in to get Dari a mount of her own, now that it looked as if she'd need it to travel to and from the Academy. The new one was a gentle-looking grey mare, with a used but passable saddle. 

Dari was beside herself with joy when she saw her gift. I really thought I'd never get her calmed down enough for us to be on our way. She just kept hugging everyone and saying how she'd never forget them, not ever. Now and then, though, a different look would come into her eyes, a look that reminded me uncomfortably of the haunted expression I'd catch sometimes in Siann's eyes. My little Dari was an innocent child no longer.

No, I still wasn't overly pleased about the way things had turned out. But Dari was young. She might well change her mind ten times over about her future. And if she didn't? 

Well, if not, it was her life, not mine, wasn't it?

I sighed. If it was this hard for me to let go, how much harder must it be for the actual parents of a child? And yet, the child must be set free at some point, if it is ever to find its own true path.

Our plans were to stop at the Academy on our way to Corinth, since it wasn't far from the city. To that end, Siann had made up a scroll recommending Dari, while Iolaus would be with us to talk to Jason himself. If she were to be accepted, she would then go home and try to sell her mother on the idea. Dari was quite confident that she'd prevail, and I rather expected she might be right, especially with the evidence of a Goddess-given dagger and a new mare to back her up.

Iolaus swung up onto his horse, waving and whooping exuberantly at all his friends, who cheered back. 

I was about to mount up myself, hoping Dari would take the hint, when Siann strode over to me.

She measured me with her eyes for a moment, then slapped me heartily on the back, nearly hard enough to knock me down. "Hey, Euphonius!" she exclaimed. "Come back and see us sometime. Maybe I'll let you buy me another drink."

As I recovered my balance, I replied merrily, "Not a chance, you old battle-ax!"

"And since when is it an insult to be a battle-ax?" came the quick rejoinder. "It's a perfectly respectable weapon, you know."

We both laughed, then I looked doubtfully at my horse, wondering how I was going to get up into the saddle using just one hand. Realizing my problem, Siann laced her hands together, offering me a leg up. She didn't even make a remark about wimpy little merchants when she did it, but she damn near tossed me entirely over my horse in her effort to help.

Dari was still running about, hugging people and saying her good-byes. Iolaus caught Siann's eye, then jerked his chin towards the girl.

"I'll take care of it, buddy," Siann replied. I saw her trot over to Vachon and whisper in his ear, then he spoke to Myka. Before I realized what was happening, Dari had been lifted in the air and was being passed over the heads of the assembled crowd. With much hollering and cheering, they finally set her on top of her new mount. 

With a mischievous glance at Iolaus, Dari kicked her horse into a gallop and headed down the road. Accepting the challenge, Iolaus took off after her, while I followed at a more sedate pace.

As I watched them both disappear around a curve, it struck me that I wasn't hurting over Iolaus anymore. I still desired him with all my heart, but now I knew I hadn't lost him, not really.

I had to assume that he now believed I wouldn't hang onto him, or allow myself to be hurt by the fact that I wasn't the chief love of his life. After all, hadn't he freely chosen to have sex with Siann and me? Unlike several of our other encounters, it couldn't be written off as the result of drunkenness or desperation, since we had been neither. That meant it could well happen again, somewhere down the road.

Sure, there were no promises. But there are always possibilities.

Iolaus might well be with Hercules for the rest of his life, but even so, a part of him belonged to me, and always would.

I could be happy with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short blurb here. In addition to fanfiction, I also write original ebooks under the name of Karl Five for erotica and as KL Schaefer for science fiction. They are all free, since I'm more interested in readers than dollars. Those ebooks may be found on Smashwords, Barnes & Noble, and iBooks, but not on Amazon, since they won't allow an author to list all of their works as free.


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